The Clan of the Cave Bear (1986). A young Cro-Magnon woman is raised by Neanderthals.
Not even sure what to say about this one other than it's a mess from start to finish. It feels pretty transparently like an attempt to capitalise on the success and cultural legacy of Quest for Fire five years earlier, but Michael Chapman is no Jean-Jacques Annaud. It's clunky, misogynistic, and the worst thing cinema can be - boring. 2/10.
It’s not really that horrific to me. But the thing that really spooked me was how deep and wide they cut themselves up drawing blood from their thumbs.
The Thing is a 1982 American science fiction horror film directed by John Carpenter from a screenplay by Bill Lancaster. Based on the 1938 John W. Campbell Jr. novella Who Goes There?, it stars Kurt Russell, with A. Wilford Brimley, T. K. Carter, David Clennon, Keith David, Richard Dysart, Charles Hallahan, Peter Maloney, Richard Masur, Donald Moffat, Joel Polis, and Thomas G. Waites.
The Thing was a pretty good movie. I went into this movie knowing the general idea of it. An alien disguises itself as the people it's around and tries to kill the rest of them.
You may be familiar with some certain games that use this concept, but The Thing came out first.
I did enjoy the movie though. I actually didn't know Keith David was in it so hearing his voice was kind of a surprise.
I also enjoyed that you never really saw the alien itself. The only time you did see the alien was when it had already become part of one of the people so it was some weird amalgamation of human and alien.
It was less of an actual alien like the Yautja or the Xenomorphs and more like a parasite that takes over the body.
It's an interesting take on the alien movie genre.
However, I thought the movie overall was pretty slow and just kind of boring.
Obviously, it had some great scenes and was a great idea, but the movie itself I thought was just kind of boring to sit through, even the ending battle.
I felt like a lot of the movie felt the same, a lot of accusing, burning, etc, and all of it was really slow to boot.
The effects were really great, I do love some practical effects, but I just don't think that can save this movie from being nothing more than lackluster.
I don't think this gets talked about enough, but the noises that the Windows-Thing makes when he gets torched will ALWAYS hurt my feelings. It sounds like he wasn't fully assimilated and was still partly human when he died. Our poor mans 😭💔
Windows looks like a doll. He has really straight white teeth that don’t look real and his features just. Seem like the kind you’d find on a porcelain doll.
a thorough investigation of thomas bordeleau’s smile so that i do not fall asleep on my breaks at work today
^^^ my sleep paralysis demon keeping me awake
research question: is thom’s fake smile crooked? is his real smile crooked? is he bad at posing in photos he himself does not take?
1. we are starting with photos of thom i already have on my phone, the number of which is probably going to be embarrassing but i can only have 10 on a post at a time. hopefully i don’t have more than that
this was easier than i thought because i forgot i had video of thom being giggly & embarrassed by podcast hosts—for sure a real smile, for sure real crooked. woof ✊😔
however i feel like this is cheating because the original smile in question was photographed, which leads me to:
2. more photos of borde on my phone
are you only showing half your mouth because the other half is crooked? this is the start of the evidence that borde is incredibly particular about angles & very aware of what he looks like on camera
real hot girls have italian summer boyfriends 😜 crooked smile is in full display but we don’t get the full eye crinkle—obviously a posed photo but likely caught in the middle of actually smiling and being happy, so the pearly whites are out [also: real wh*res wear their necklaces so that the pendant sits in the divot of their collarbone. speaking from experience bords i’m gonna ki** you]
more italian summer boyfriend posting, increasingly more photo op posed, evidenced by the closed mouth smile. this is the most relatable picture of him i have ever seen because i too am gay and do not know how to pose without throwing up a ✌️and awkwardly smiling without my teeth when forced to take a picture. unfortunately i don’t have an italian summer boyfriend wearing little white short shorts to gently touch elbows with :(
this is not a smile but it’s still crooked and i’m mad about it, and i also am 99% sure i saved this for matty looking good in the background before i even cared about thom but now that i’m unhinged this is good arm tattoo content (have been wondering about the little one on his left arm, clearly says “faith” here) and nose scar? scratch? freckle? it’s endearing 😡
3. this is still just more photos from my phone but i can’t have a list with two things on it so we’re all pretending like this is a valid bullet point
blanks my adopted blorbo 🥺🥺 this is a photo caught in motion of bords really smiling, unaware of the camera, which i’m using as evidence to say that thom real smiles w/ teeth. he looks overjoyed to see blanks & i can’t fault him (we are not discussing the kj tag now)
4. I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING TO GOOGLE SO I CAN STOP SCROLLING THROUGH MY CAMERA ROLL
thom looks like he inherited half of his mouth from his dad and half of it from his mom split down the middle (please see the chart)
assuming that this is baby thom, the smile has forever been tilted which is possibly even worse than the formation of a habit or a slant caused by injury or like. dip lip. nooooo borde has ALWAYS been like this
to conclude: i forgot what the question was but now you have a ??? masterpost ??? of borde’s crooked mouth 🤧