#They're not awkward just not good at making friends lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

inkskinned · 1 year

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it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.

anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."

just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.

i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.

when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.

but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.

i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?

most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.

now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.

and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.

go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.

#something something toxic relationships notwithstanding #(re: the friends stuff)#most people love you. automatically. for being alive. like people are just MADE that way.#and the reason kms jokes don't always land is bc people fucking love you and are like - ahhh how do i help #let them help you!!!!!!

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ln444 · 6 months

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my english love affair

cw: MDNI+18, f!reader, strangers to lovers, soulmates au, fluff, smut, maybe slight angst? depends on how you see it lol, fingering (f), penetration, soft dirty talk, a lot (like a lot) of kissing and sharing long gazes, whipped lando again bc im obsessed sorry.

now playing: english love affair by 5sos, let me by zayn.

notes: omg this took so long 😭 i'm not really confident abt my smut, i feel like i'm writing fluff way better but i hope you like it!! i might write a part 2, let me know if you like this one! enjoy🤍

requested by anon | requests open!

______________________________________________

“when the lights go out, she's all i ever think, i can't forget my english love affair, today i'm seven thousand miles away”

the thought of finally going back to his f1 driver life fills lando with excitement. sure, lando loves england — it's his home, after all. but nothing can compare to the rush he feels when he's in an f1 car, traveling all around the world and meeting his fans.

for his last night town, lando's friends convinced him to hit the club. normally, he prefers staying in to rest before the start of the season but a little fun doesn't hurts, right? he won't have much time to do it during the grand prix.

despite his fame, lando still gets surprised when someone recognizes him, especially at the club. he knows he's known for his looks, and he's aware of the attention from admirers, but it still catches him off guard in real life. sometimes, the attention can be overwhelming, especially when he just wants to have a good time with his friends and ends up with some overly clingy girls.

lando decides to excuse himself, seeking some fresh air. the pressure of the coming season is getting to him, and the situation doesn't help. he finds a quiet spot with a few people smoking and making out, leans against the wall, and closes his eyes for a moment, letting out a relieved sigh.

suddenly, a voice startles him from his thoughts, "did your friends force you to come here too?" his head jerks towards you, and you're standing beside him, out of nowhere. he takes time to answer, surprised by your unexpected presence. after realizing that he left you without any response, he clears his throat, a bit confused, "nah, just needed some fresh air" he mumbles, a small smile forming on his lips. you chuckle slightly, and comment "not surprised, having so many girls fawning over you must be exhausting", there's a small hint of tease in your voice that makes lando's smile grows.

finally, as he turns to study your features under the soft glow of the night lights, lando finds himself entranced by your captivating beauty, the grace of your features leaving an indelible impression on him. he can't help but get lost in your eyes shining in the dim illumination, making it difficult for him to look away. it takes him a good minute to quickly look away, thanking the night for hiding his rosé cheeks.

he gazes at the sky, trying to think of something to say that doesn't sound awkward — and also trying to get his shit together. he suddenly feels the need to make a good impression. "i mean, it's not that i don't appreciate the attention, but wow, they can be quite persistent."

his hands find their way into the pockets of his jacket, and his eyes avoid meeting yours, fearing he might get lost in them again. "yeah, i know. they're my friends," you say with a small chuckle, not because he's making fun of them, but more because of the use of the term 'friends.'

lando's eyes widen, and he turns to you, 'i'm sorry, i didn't mean to-' but he stops himself, looking down, feeling too embarrassed to find the right words. you laugh softly and move closer to him, your shoulders brushing and lando can feel his body tense up due to the closeness.

"hey, it's okay. i don't really consider them my friends, anyway," you say nonchalantly and lando lets out a sigh of relief, a smile slowly spreading on his face. "wow, that's nice for them", you both laugh and lando doesn't miss the way you subtly lean into him, your shoulders finally touching. he turns his head away from you, clearing his throat once more, trying to control the warmth spreading through his body.

"hey", you suddenly call out after a minute of tranquil silence and lando dares to meet your gaze, instantly regretting when he's captivated by your radiant eyes. he finds himself unable to look away and you both share an intense, unspoken connection, as if you've known each other for years. everything feels perfectly right at this moment.

"wanna get out of here?" you finally suggest, your words barely more than a whisper, your focus entirely on lando's mesmerizing eyes. you take his hand, both fitting perfectly like two puzzle pieces and you let him drag you in the dark streets.

after a walk filled with stolen gaze and silly conversations, you found yourself on lando's couch, engrossed in his f1 souvenirs and you have never felt so much passion, feeling your heart soften every time your see that sparkles in his eyes. lando never thought that his night will end up like this. sure, he might ended up with a girl from the club like he usually do, but this time was different. he never really experienced this; having sweet and innocent conversations with a stranger from a club. the atmosphere is tranquil yet there's a subtle tension in the air.

lando couldn't help but be his flirty self, playfully teasing you from time to time. however, your responses makes him somewhat nervous — it's a new sensation to him, having a girl making him feel this way. perhaps it's the way you gazes at him with patience and attention, your lovely smile that you share generously with him or how closely you listen to his random f1 stories. lando and you end up scrolling through photos in his phone, with him recounting the stories behind each one. he couldn't help but feel his heart melt your reactions; your smiles, your laughs, and your curiosity as you ask for more details and share your own anecdotes.

a soothing silence descended, and the two of you sit beside each other, thighs and shoulders lightly touching. lando struggles to contain the fluttering feeling in his stomach when you turn to look at him. he dares to meet your gaze, trying to focus on your eyes rather than your enticing lips. lost in each other eyes, you can't tear your gazes away. a brand new emotion envelops both of you, one that's strangely familiar yet undeniably unique, as though destiny has brought you together in this very moment and lando can't help but wonder if soulmates might actually exist.

you finally speak, after what feels like an eternity, in a soft voice, "you can kiss me, lando", you whisper like it's a secret. lando stomach tighten and he don't even take the time to answer, gently placing his hand on your cheek to pull you for a shy kiss. your lips discover each other, timidly and your hands instinctively slides around his neck to pull him closer.

you can't seem to get enough of each other, savoring every moment as you explore each other's mouths. lando's hand venture on your hips, and the chill of his touch sends shivers down your spine, as you suppress a soft moan in your throat. the kiss grows more intense, both of you yearning for more. without the need for words, you share an unspoken understanding of each other's needs, as if you've been intimately connected for ages. out of breath, you both finally pull away, foreheads touching, sharing a playful gaze, giggling and blushing like teenagers experiencing their very first kiss.

after one last sweet peck on the lips, lando takes your hand and stands, guiding you towards the bedroom, careful not to stumble due to both your impatience and the lingering dizziness of that passionate kiss.

not wasting time, he gently guides you onto the bed, positioning himself on top of you. he can't resist the urge to pause and admire you, your eyes shimmering in the soft glow of the dim lights. before he gets lost in that gaze, his eyes roam to study every detail of your face, causing you to blush and squirm beneath him. your arms tighten around his neck, and you chuckle, bringing lando back to the present. "like what you see?" you whisper, stealing a smile from him as he draws closer, his lips teasingly brushing against yours. "oh, absolutely," he murmurs before capturing your lips in a kiss. this time, it feels different; electrifying.

lando's hands slips, beneath your dress, and this time a whimper escapes your lips, making lando smirk through the kiss. his hands dares to explore the skin of your thighs, creating an unusual feeling in your stomach — and making your pussy slightly throb. your fingers finds their way into his curls, gripping onto them as the kiss becomes messier; your tongues dancing together.

"just take it off already" you huff and puff, seeing lando struggling and he lets out a chuckle "damn, someone is impatient", he says, teasing you, before finally taking your dress off. his eyes travel your body, and you've never felt so vulnerable, your cheeks burning. lando let out an unwanted groan, completely loving the view and he stares a bit too long until you pull him for another kiss to put him out of his thoughts. he takes a moment to kiss you back and it's your turn to slide your hands beneath his shirt, playing with the lines of his abdomen, making him moan softly against your lips.

after a good minute of kissing and touching, you finally take off his shirt and his pants, on the way, leaving you both in your underwear. lando leaves kisses along your jawline, going down to your chest, his hand sliding in your back to unbutton your bra and the way your boobs bounce out of it makes lando groan, feeling his erection grows. your grip on his hair gets tighter as you watch him play with your nipples, flicking it and licking it and the view drives you crazy.

you moan his name softly, pulling on his hair to make him look at you and you share a long stare, full of lust, both craving for more. you pull him for a sloppy kiss, trying to show how impatient you are and lando gets the message, pulling down your panties and getting rid of his boxers.

lando's mouth leaves yours and is replaced by his fingers, stealing a whimper from you. your eyes meets his as you suck on his fingers and, if they could, his eyes would burn holes into yours. lando found himself getting more and more impatient, the way you suck on his fingers with that irresistible look making it harder for him to contain it.

pulling out his fingers out of your mouth and without leaving your eyes for a second, his two fingers found your hole, slipping gently in it and you throw instinctively your head backwards, a moan escaping your mouth. lando take a good look at you in that position before taking the opportunity to leave kisses on your exposed neck, fighting the urge to suck on it to not leave marks, not wanting to overstep your boundaries.

"feeling okay?" he whispers softly, his breath hitting your skin, making it difficult for you to fight the whimpers escaping your mouth. lando takes a minute to look at you, to make sure that you don't feel any pain or discomfort.

"mmh'yes, you can move, please oh my god" you desperately says and lando can't help but pull you for another messy kiss. his fingers start moving in you, stretching your walls and you become a moaning mess, your eyes closing and lando takes advantage of it to admire you, his moves getting faster and faster.

"are you close, princess?" he murmurs close to your lips, feeling your body trembling and hearing the way your moans gets louder. you can only shake your head; feeling the bottom of your stomach getting warmer and the nickame almost make you choke on your moans. lando slows down to make scissors movements, his thumb rubbing your clit to help you reach your climax. he can't take off his eyes of you, inspecting every aspect of your face; the way your face crunches and your mouth is slightly open to let multiple sounds out of it. he could almost come just by this sight, his own crotch getting bigger.

with a loud and long moan, you finally climax, arching your back and lando plant soft pecks on your neck, whispering sweet words to you and telling you how good you're doing. breathless, you absently stroke his hair and close your eyes for a moment trying to calm the beat of your heart but lando makes it hard; his hands traveling your body and his lips attached to the skin of your neck.

the sudden emptiness when lando pulls out his fingers make you whimper and he lift his head to meet your gaze — he lost count of how many times he got lost in your eyes tonight. your hand make its way to his cock and the sudden touch makes lando slightly startle, a groan leaving his mouth. before you start stroking it, his hand comes to stop you immediately and you look at him, confused and with a hint of worry; silently asking him if you did something wrong.

"wanna fuck you now or i might go crazy", he says, almost whimpering and you slightly laugh, pulling his face closer to yours. "someone is impatient huh", you tease, a small smirk forming on your lips and he can't help but mirror that smirk. "how can i not when you look at me like that?" he takes your bottom lip between his teeth before kissing you again, his body getting closer and his cock brushing on your pussy makes you both moan through the kiss. you take his dick, once again, in your hand to guide it through your hole this time. and slowly, he penetrates you, a long groan escaping his lips at how tight you feel around him and you break the kiss to moan loudly.

"so fucking tight, baby, just for me", he mumbles close to your lips and you can't even answer, too overwhelmed by the way he's filling you — and his dirty words. when you finally adjust, he doesn't waste any minutes and start moving. you both moan in unison, holding into each other like your life depends on it. he watches you go crazy over his cock; the way your eyes gets watery, the way you hold into the sheets — your other hand too busy pulling his hair —, the way you can't control the continuous moans, his name slipping out of your mouth from time to time and encouraging him to go deeper into you. and he does go deeper, slowing down the pace to thrust into you as deep as he can, reaching your sensitive spot.

"right here? like that, baby?" he moans, feeling you tightening around him. his voice makes it harder for you to hold your growing orgasm. your hand leaves the sheets to hold onto his shoulder, your nails crawling into his skin. lando suddenly feels the urge to look at you in the eyes — maybe because his orgasm is getting close too. his hand finds a way to your neck, his fingers wrapping around it gently "look at me, angel", he says in a husky voice that could make you come at any moment. struggling to keep your eyes open, you try your best to hold his gaze, the way he's looking at you making you insane.

his thrusts gets faster and you can't control the sounds escaping from your mouth anymore. you look away for a moment, too overwhelmed and lando's hand travels to your face, cupping it gently to keep it straight "eyes on me, love". you obey, meeting his gaze and it's all too much for you.

you don't even have to use words for lando to understand that you're getting close, the way your eyes gets watery and your body shakes is enough. with his hand going back to your throat, lando accompany you into your orgasm, enjoying the way you scream his name and you manage to hold his gaze. his own orgasm comes a few minutes after yours and he makes sure to pull out before ejaculating, his groans echoing in the room. he immediately falls besides you and you both just stay like this: his leg over yours, your hand still in his hair as you try to catch your breath. lando uses his last drops of strength to grab a tissue from the nightstand and clean his fresh cum on your stomach.

he pulls you close again, linking your legs together and letting you play with his hair. the silence is so peaceful; the warm of your bodies making you both relax immediately. a smile unconsciously forms on lando's lips at the sight of your tired face, your eyes shining in the almost dark atmosphere of the night. you look back at him, smiling back and giggling, making lando raise an eyebrow in confusion.

"what's so funny?" he says, fighting the smile growing on his lips. "i just slept with the lando norris", you tease and lando groans, hiding his face in his arm. "i knew you were a fan!" he replies playfully, playing along. you laugh in sync and lando's heart feels at peace; all the worries about the incoming season completely forgotten. your hand gently plays with his curls as you absently stare at the ceiling, an unbeatable smile on your face.

lando, on the other side, can't take his eyes off you, watching you slowly fall asleep and enjoying your fingers in his hair. and just before you completely close your eyes, you turn to him, offering him a last kiss; so tender and passionate that your hearts both might burst out of your chests. pulling out, lando watches you fall asleep, not fighting the smile on his face anymore.

he usually struggles to sleep before an important day but this time, his mind is only filled with you and this night spent by your side. and just like that, it's lando's turn to meet the sandman.

with a groan, lando struggles to reach and silence the blaring alarm. the morning sunlight aggressively shines through the curtain, making him shield his face with his arm, staying in half asleep state for a minute as he gradually gets out of it.

then it suddenly hits him; you're no longer beside him.

lando suddenly starts to panic, jolting him into full wakefulness. he springs out of the bed and desperately search for any signs of you in every room of his apartment but you're nowhere to be found. he mutters curses under his breath, passing a hand to his messy hair — the thought of you messing his hair last night making him even more frustrated. defeated, he returns to the bedroom, his gaze falling on the tousled sheets where everything happened. as lando realizes that he didn't even ask for your name, frustration festered within him, causing him to clench his hair.

however, amidst his self reproach, a small piece of paper on the nightstand catch his attention, and he immediately rushes to it.

"we will meet again, i promise. you're going to kill it, lovely boy. y/n, x"

lando can't even fight the smile creeping on his lips, his heart softening — it was beating way too fast just by the thought of not even knowing your name. he sinks back onto the bed, your smell immediately hitting him and making him even happier. he reads those few words repeatedly and his hands falls onto his chest, holding the paper close to his heart as he whispers your name again and again, savoring its melodious sound. lando can't help but tell himself that soulmates might exist.

"i am going to kill it,", lando murmured to himself, a foolish grin etching on his face.

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part 2?:p join the tag list here!

masterlist

#lando norris x reader #lando norris #f1 x reader #f1 #f1 fluff #f1 imagine #f1 angst #f1 smut #lando norris smut #lando norris fluff #lando norris imagine #lando norris drabble #lando norris fanfic

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simpjaes · 4 months

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pizza delivery guy!jake delivering reader an extra large sausage pizza 🤗

i hate how funny this is but also

pizza delivery guy jake:

tags: implied sex (not rly super detailed), reader is assumed to be vegetarian lol

Jake looks forward to his saturday night shifts for a lot of reasons, but none as good as you. The girl who orders for her group of friends at eleven at night on the dot, always two veggie pizzas, and always with a big tip.

You were a regular, of course, who he would jump to deliver to solely to see a room full of pretty girls batting their lashes at him despite his minimum wage status.

It got to the point even, that you'd request for him to deliver your food each time you order. Each tip got bigger, bigger, and bigger, up until Jake pulls up with your measly two veggie pizzas in a new car. With a new jacket, and a pretty smile.

What the pretty deliver driver didn't know? The fact that your friends hype you to try and get his number every single time he delivers.

The fact that sometimes you guys get a bit rowdy and tipsy, and go as far as making jokes about corny porno scenarios where he comes in with a large sausage for you, and oh no! you don't have money to pay! what ever shall you do?

It would stay as a funny little joke if it wasn't for the four plus hours of your friends hyping you. Saying, "come on, you never order a sausage pizza, he'll definitely pick up the hint. And if he rejects you, just play it off like a joke!"

You did. You did order that sausage pizza and, well, Jake did pick up the hint.

Driving to your house in silence, wondering why you suddenly added a winky emoji after his name in the delivery requests. Wondering why you suddenly ordered a pizza with an ingredient that resembles a dick. Wondering why he pulls up and you're alone when you answer the door in a scantily clad outfit and a shy smile on your face.

He's stunned to look at you tonight, to be honest, as he dips his head into your doorway with a confused face.

"Where are your friends?" He asks casually, leaning back and attempting to push your pizza forward and into your hands.

You shrug, pretending that they're not just around the corner listening.

"No one showed up tonight, I'm lonely." You play off the scenarios in your head, entirely because you really could just play it off like a joke.

"O- oh." Jake tries to smile at you, letting the puzzle pieces click together in his head. He really thinks you're implying right now. "I, um, I get off work at midnight, you know. If you're bored."

"Wait, really?" You ask, shocked that he doesn't appear to find this corny at all, but understanding far more as to why he offered when you note his eyes staring straight at the sheer pajama top you're wearing....with no bra.

"Um, yeah...if you want." He asks for your confirmation. "I could probably get off early too, it's slowed down a lot."

You smile, nodding to him as you take the single large sausage pizza.

"Okay then..." You say, kind of awkward and shy because you seriously can't believe that worked. "I'll see you in an hour then?"

He nods with a smile, clasping both hands in front of himself as if to hide the semi-hard on in his pants that you definitely notice.

And then he's gone, and you're standing there with a sausage pizza, a shocked face, and three girls rushing to giggle beside you.

♡♡♡♡

Naturally, and against the will of your friends, you have them pack up and leave the typical girl's night with a very sober uber as you sit in wait for midnight to strike.

And when it does? Jake shows up much as he said he would, in a plain t-shirt rather than his uniform, with a curious look in his eye because it does feel weird that he's here without a pizza exchange.

"So..." He says, rubbing the tip of his shoe into the frame of your door.

"So," You echo him, leaning against the frame yourself as you look at him.

"How lonely are you tonight?" He boldly asks.

You stay silent as you back up and flick your head to invite him in, still in your scantily clad pajamas with no underwear on.

"Lonely enough to order a fucking sausage pizza to get your attention?" You laugh, pointing to the uneaten pizza.

He lends you a laugh at that, which is a very nice sound.

"Was the sausage thing for real?" He finally asks when he sits on your couch with you.

"What do you mean?" You try to avoid the question, feeling dumb for even going this route to do this.

"Like, are you asking me to fuck you or do you actually just want to hang out?"

Well.

"Oh, um," You look away from him with a smile. "Could we not work it out to have both?"

Jake nods with a smirk, hand immediately landing against the button of his jeans as he looks at you.

"I think we can manage that."

And well, you do. Both of you do manage that.

You recall the events to your friends the next day, over how good he worked his tongue between your legs, over how good you worked your tongue on him.

They stopped listening around the time when you described the way you rode him right here, in the very spot on the couch they're sitting.

But their ears perked up a bit more at the description of how big his cock was, and how good it felt to have it split you open. Even better when he filled you up time and time again, until about four in the morning when he finally went home.

The best part about this? You don't even have to order a pizza to look at him next time. All you needed to do was snap a titty pic and Jake was risking his job to rush into your house just to fuck you up and against the little table in your entry way.

It's fun really, giving your little pizza delivery hook-up a quickie before his next delivery that will definitely come a bit later than it's supposed to.

#harthots #jake smut #enhypen smut #ask #anon #.jake

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yesimwriting · 3 months

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I feel like the reader in best friend!Felix is actually really smart, heck, let's say genius even, but is really oblivious when it comes to sentiment. The reader gives off nerd vibes, but they're so smart to the point it's a cool kinda thing. And if this was before Felix met Oliver, I feel like reader, like Farleigh, would get bad vibes from Ollie too but would be too shy? I guess, to say anything cause hey, they're new and stuff. I like the fic:) It's nice to read something like that, without the explicit content, I mean:D

A/n: omg love this,, definitely doing a bestfriend!felix blurb on this concept later, i just wanted to explore character dynamics for a second lol

fun fact: i originally pictured bestfriend!reader as a literal genius with -3 street smarts, it's just info that didn't make it into the fic!!

also i could see reader as being so smart they skipped a grade (if we want to add to the power/social imbalance by making reader a little younger, but not like weirdly younger) open to thoughts on this !

i picture bestfriend!reader as having an elle woods quality to their intelligence in terms of awareness (and maybe aesthetic, it is the early 2000's lol),, reiterating the most complicated parts of a lecture perfectly during a study session while half focused on applying lip gloss, aces exams while hungover (bc felix insisted on going out), and never registers how impressive all of it is

very much "what? like it's hard" but as literal as that statement could be

which could add to reader's shyness/uncertainty bc she forgets she's a little intimidating

okay but the potential of reader getting bad vibes from oliver if she became close friends with felix a little after oliver did?? too good

reader doesn't want to alienate oliver, he's the only one around felix that's also an outsider, that should make it easier to bond

but!! because reader is that smart, she has this gut feeling that tells her to keep him at arm's length,, but bc she's not the best at picking up on feelings, it's basically just that 6th sense thing that girls have that tells them when a guy has weird/unsafe intentions

bc reader can't articulate their concern, or understand it, they try to be nice, but oliver can tell that there's this distrust there

it drives him crazy

first of all, reader should be the easiest one to win over bc she's not one of the elites and she's a little awkward from time to time, it's frustrating that there doesn't seem to be a crux for him to use to weasel his way into reader's heart

oliver's aware that he can get close to felix without the others liking him as long as they tolerate him enough in public, but with reader, oliver knows more about felix's real feelings for them than felix does

that adds this timing element to the situation that’s stressful, because as soon as felix realizes how he feels about the reader, that will be that

meanwhile, reader is a little worried about being dropped bc of the tension between her and oliver, but oliver doesn’t fully notice that, he’s too distracted by his feelings

it's not fair, oliver "had" felix first, but oliver's perfectly capable of adapting to the situation, so he accepts it and looks at it practically

oliver knows that there is no fully "in" with felix unless you like him, so despite any resentment and jealousy he feels towards you, he decides that he'll do whatever it takes to get it

#bestfriend!felix #saltburn x reader #felix x reader #felix catton x reader

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fear-is-truth · 1 month

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The Evans

their reactions when meeting their partner's friend who flirts with them.

warnings: violence. mentions of sex. cursing. good ol’ murder. the usual

requested by : anon

“the evans meeting one of the readers friends and that friend tries to flirt with them? like the reader is like "hey this is my friend" and the friend immediately starts flirting with them, even tho they know they're in a relationship. like how would they react?”

Tate Langdon

flat out ignores their advances.

he won’t even hesitate to call out your friend’s behavior.

“I think your friend here wants me to fuck her. so obvious that it’s kinda sad, really.” in a deadpan tone.

proceeds to roast the hell out of them.

“You remind me of my mother.. ugly, unwanted and a total whore,”

bro is a savage. your friendship pretty much ruined at that point. (mission accomplished)

pre cult! Kai Anderson

boy would be a mess and kinda freak out like he’d have no idea what he did to get this attention.

avoids eye contact.

follows you around like a puppy cuz he does not want to be left alone with your annoying friend and make things super awkward.

blue hair!pre-cult Kai would simply lose his temper and slap them. dude has zero chill.

cult leader! Kai Anderson

okay first of all what kind of dumb bitch would even have the audacity to flirt with this guy?

as if his ego couldn’t get even more inflated-

he’d wouldn’t flirt back, but he’ll allow it to happen just to see your reaction.

smug as hell.

if you kill the slut, he’d get so horny and fuck you then and there.

“shit.. you killed her?”

“…”

“attagirl.”

James Patrick March

I imagine two possible scenarios:

a.) he’d call your friend a “filthy harlot with no shame or self respect” right to their face then kill them.

b.) he’d put on a very polite facade and then kill them.

either way, they end up dead.

he’ll make sure that you watch (or participate) the torture and process of the murder.

because you are his goddess and he’s your no.1 simp.

makes sure that they die outside the hotel, too.

“perhaps you should be more careful about what sort of crowd you associate yourself with, dear,”

frat boy!Kyle Spencer

point blank refuses to flirt back.

finds ways to include you into the conversation, like what you guys are planning to do after college, that cool ice cream shop you two tried out on a date etc.

the type of guy who says “no, I have a girlfriend,” instead of “sorry, I have a girlfriend,” that’s a huge difference y’all, jot that down!

franken! Kyle

don’t even worry about it. sweet boy only has eyes for you.

worry about your friend. you know what happened to madison lol

Kit Walker

laughs along politely but refuses any physical contact.

lowkey annoyed as hell.

stays close to you at all times, casually holding your hand or flirting with you in hopes that your friend would get the hint.

the second your friend leaves, he’d roll his eyes, smile at you and breath a sigh of relief.

Jimmy Darling

he’d smile and wink, not in a flirty way but like in a friendly good-natured way.

kinda backfired because who can resist the jimmy darling wink™?! your dumb friend actually thought they had a chance.

he’d feel super guilty about accidentally leading them on and even more guilty at upsetting you.

gets super handsy and affectionate. lowkey panicky that you’d get mad.

becomes frustrated if your friend keeps on with the flirting. won’t try to hide his annoyance.

might raise his voice slightly.

Austin Sommers

bro casually flirts with everyone.

all genders, for that matter.

it’s all part of his sparkling personality.

but no worries. he’s just playing with his supper. gotta fix the ‘hungies’

TAGLIST @acidbrainstorm @evanpetersmybf @alittlesil @kaiandersonsdevotedwife @ellaaaaa44 @newwavesylviaplath @warrenlipkaswife @slvt4jamesmarch @kaismanwich @maddaline @evpeters87 @lacucarachapisser @howtobesasha @lissasharp @feefymo @night-prowler666 @nickrhodeslittledarling @bluerthanvelvet444 @r8ttenapples @nahoyasboyfriend @kai-slut @lak3cityqui3tpills @coentinim @doll3tt33 @taintandviolent @babygorewhore @stveharringtn @violet1737 @sukirosiac @slutforgarlogan @90sbr1descake @the-ultimate-theatre-kid

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goldflinches · 3 months

Text

so. Dream gets cursed by an spurned admirer/ex/random vindictive magic user which he pays absolutely no mind to because he's definitely been cussed out worse than that.

But suddenly anyone and everyone he encounters becomes a simpering mess/fawning idiot around him. in the Dreaming, everyone acts so horrendously out of character that it becomes so so awkward for him. absolutely tanks his productivity. the earthquakes (dreamquakes?) may or may not facilitate in some necessary physical distancing. someone lobs the L word at him and he nearly rips a hole through space and time to get away. it's better/worse in the Waking world. he doesn't know these people trying to seduce him. but they are still trying to seduce him so he does the Endless version of power walking away from this problem.

and he makes his way to The New Inn where he knows Hob is. he has absolutely no idea what Hob can do but going to a friend is a better alternative to just going from realm to realm, power walking away from a collection of people convinced they are in love?? with him????

Hob is definitely at his usual place in the New Inn and can absolutely feel the change in atmosphere the moment Dream enters. suddenly everyone zeroes in on Dream and Hob...has never seen that expression on his friend's face. like a cornered animal, if only in the form of a more than a god, no less than a goth that is Dream of the Endless. so Hob manages to shoo away the crowd from Dream, using his extraordinary powers of being the owner of the inn everyone is in to good use.

they hole up at Hob's place and try to figure out what the actual fuck is going on. Hob concludes that yes Dream, someone saying that "your lack of understanding of love is obviously caused by the scarcity of it in your life," and "that can be solved easily," is at the v least a red flag and at most the reason why there is a horde of people on your walking aphrodisiac ass rn. Dream points out that it's mild criticism not a curse. Hob does not have the training or time to unpack that one today.

hijinks that occur while they're trying to uncurse Dream:

call in Constantine for back up. the house call goes very badly for everyone involved. there was a sultry come on. a creature older than humanity lowkey scrambling up the kitchen shelves. an immortal testing his immortality by throwing a hissing magic user out the door. anyway. the consultation goes on much better on the phone. everyone promises never to talk about this incident ever again.

Dream contemplating on whether he should call on his siblings because they might know something about this or even causing it. but what they also get affected by this curse. would Dream be able to handle that?? and his thoughts spin out of control until Dream wordlessly just lies down on Hob's living room floor. Hob panics because is this the next part of the curse??? no it's just Dream borrowing trouble which is it's own curse but one at a time please and thank you.

Hob fighting off a delivery person who nearly breaks the door down when they catch a glimpse of Dream still on the living room floor. no one was hurt, no dumplings were forsaken, a huge tip was placed on the delivery person's face before closing the door.

the nature of love is discussed over dimsum. it's mostly how Dream deserves to be loved and respected (Hob) vs huh what a concept (Dream)

Matthew tries to sneak in so Hob and Dream have to find new hiding places in the Hob's place. the current favorite is under a blanket with a flashlight on

At some point Dream realizes that Hob is just. the way he usually is around Dream. no throwing himself af Dream or flowery declarations or anything??? Dream concludes (wrongly) that Hob's immortality might be making him immune. Hob is just sitting there, wondering if going "lol no, it's too late for that!! i've been down bad for you for centuries!!!" would be an appropriate response. it's not but god is he tempted. he gives in to his other temptation and lets Dream think that "yes immortality has anti-curse properties i guess, you really do learn something new everyday (cue nervous laughter)" 👀👀👀

#dreamling #TBC because im down to 5% battery lmaoo #but yea the curse is obsession at first sight and it goes away when Dream is out of sight #because that's what the curser felt about Dream and it reflected in the curse #vs Hob caring and loving (and definitely at least a lil bit obsessed) about Dream #even if it has been defined by the 100 years apart as much as the meetings themselves #thoughts have been thunk

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hopelesslyromanticshark · 2 months

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Since you write for Connor and for solange platonic, could you do a fem! Reader x Connor where the reader is friends with solangelo and the two of them set the reader and Connor up together.

⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚ The Love Doctor Is In !!

content: connor stoll x daughter of apollo! reader warning: language, very brief reference to sexual stuff, blood??? author's note: so, i did tweak the request a little, making the reader a daughter of apollo, so that they'd have a reason to be in the infirmary and what not. hope that's okay!! i also decided to make it a full fic bc i felt the idea i had for it was pretty good and i had a title, which i don't give to hcs or blurbs. so...yeah lol

"hey, will, could you..." connor trailed off as he walked into the infirmary, holding up his bloody hand. will frowned, crossing his arms as connor offered him a sheepish smile.

"y/n, it's for you!" will called back without taking his eyes off connor.

"what?" y/n questioned, peeking out from behind a curtain before her eyes fell on connor, who seemed to brighten as the girl came into view, his bloody hand seemingly forgotten.

"connie?! again?! that's the third time today!" the girl cried, indignantly, as she stomped up to the boy, pulling his hand closer so she could inspect it. connor flushed red at the nickname, pulling his free hand up to rub at the back of his neck.

"you know me, so clumsy," mused connor with a charming smile, y/n fighting off her smile.

"if i didn't know any better, i'd say you're just desperate to hang out with me," y/n murmured before quickly shooing the boy towards one of the med bays, shaking her head as she went, hoping none of her siblings would notice her blush. but one did, his frown deepening.

"they're gross. are we like that?" a voice called from the corner, a body seemingly materializing after. nico left the shadows, easily pulling himself up onto a counter and sitting there, his feet swinging slightly below him.

"nah, not that bad, at least," will replied with a shrug of his shoulders.

"wrong, on like, so many levels," insisted kayla as she walked past, earning her glares from both of the teenage boys.

"ugh, they just need to get together. move past that whole awkward phase," nico muttered, getting distracted by his chipping black nail polish, completely missing the way will's eyes lit up. will spun, pressing a kiss to nico's cheek.

"you're a genius!" he cheered and nico rolled his eyes, pretending to ignore the subtle pink taking over is cheeks

"yeah. but, for what?"

"The love doctor is, officially, in!" will replied, his smile growing as nico's slowly slipped off his face, knowing he'd get harassed into helping play matchmaker.

"oh, no."

"oh, yes."

will had asked y/n to stay late that night, apparently it was her turn to rewrap all the bandages. she could have sworn she did it earlier in the week but whatever. so there she was, alone in the infirmary and daydreaming about connor stoll. oh yes, she had a crush on him, alright. a big, fat, stupid crush that wouldn't leave her alone. and what made it all that much worse is that she was certain the boy didn't like her back. y/n sighed, picking up the rewrapped bandages and moving towards the storage closet that they belonged in. there was the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps, causing y/n to look over her shoulder at the doorway of the small closet. connor then came skidding around the corner, huffing in breaths as he approached the girl, worry coating his face.

"are you- nico, he-"

slam! y/n yelped as they both turned to the door, which had slammed shut mysteriously. connor had instinctively reached out and grasped her hand, the girl easily wrapping her arms around his arm.

"gods, that damn near gave me a heart attack," y/n breathed out, unwrapping one of her hands away from connor and pressing it to her rapidly beating heart. which couldn't entirely be blamed on the door, but rather partly on the boy beside her. connor hummed in agreement before pushing against the door, which should have just opened, but he was met with resistance. now y/n was frowning as connor continued to try before giving up with a slap of his hands against the door.

there wasn't much room in the closet, no matter where they stood some part of their bodies would be touching. connor was desperately trying not to hyper focus on her skin brushing against his, already having enough problems on his hands.

"should we, like, try calling for help?" connor offered, glancing down at the girl who just frowned.

"why were you in the infirmary?" she asked and connor ducked his head, hoping she wouldn't see his reddening cheeks

"nico said something about you getting banged up during archery. wanted...wanted to make sure you were okay," admitted connor, rocking on the balls of his feet. then he jumped as the daughter of apollo rapidly banged her fist against the door.

"let us out, you bastards! will, i know what you're trying to do but knock it off! I am not some experiment! let us out!" she yelled, shrilly, stepping back and kicking her foot against the door, which didn't even budge.

"hey, hey. it's okay, y/n," connor soothed, reaching his hands out and rubbing her shoulders, which were heaving with the effort she just put in.

"it's not okay. it's not fair, they don't know what they're doing," the girl murmured, on the verge of tears.

"what do you mean?" questioned connor, his brows furrowing and a frown settling over his lips. the girl sighed, squeezing her eyes shut before looking up at connor.

"they...they locked us in here to get me to confess to you that...that i like you. like, a lot. even though you're super clumsy and tell the dumbest jokes. but, it's okay, i know you don't like me back, so we can just go out there and-"

"woah, woah. what makes you think i don't like you?" connor cut in, unable to stop his hands from cupping her face, forcing the girl to look at him.

"did you honestly think i was that clumsy?"

"i dunno."

"y/n. i'd purposefully trip or slam into doors or get cut during training. every opportunity to see you was worth the pain. i just...i just wanted to see you- no, be with you," confessed connor, looking into her eyes to make sure she saw this as the truth.

without a second thought, y/n jolted forwards and smashed her lips against his. her hands found his hair and his neck, pulling him closer somehow. connor didn't mind, one hand continuing to rest on her cheek while the other roamed her waist and ass. they parted, breathing heavy as their foreheads rest together.

"no more accidents. doctor's orders," the daughter of apollo ordered and connor smiled, pressing a kiss to the corner of her lips.

"yes, ma'am."

"DID WE DO GOOD?? NOT TOO GOOD, THOUGH, KEEP IT PG IN THERE!!" will called through the door, earning bashful laughs from the couple.

"HOW'S RATED R?" connor called back with a smirk and a pointed squeeze to her ass. the door swung open, nico and will both glaring now.

"too far. get out," they spoke nearly in unison, both connor and y/n scrambling out of the closet and infirmary.

"the love doctor is now retired," will mused as nico slung an arm over his shoulder.

"thank the gods."

"hey!"

author's note cont. : nothing more to say on the matter lol!! hope everyone is having a good day so far and also i appreciate this request not being for percy, who i love, but like...he's flooding my LEO page yall i cannot let this continue

#postcards from covey ౨ৎ #all my love ౨ৎ #pjo #heroes of olympus #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo fandom #solangelo #connor stoll #connor stoll x reader

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pensbridge · 2 months

Text

Master Post Bridgerton Live Event Season 3

Let me just say so much of what they said leans into exactly how I pictured it.

○ Some words to describe the season: Shonda-"intimate" / Jess B-"confidence" / Luke Newts-"unexpected" / Nicola-"romantic" / Luke Thom-"zoom in"

○ They talk about Colin's words last season and say it was a good place to start in the story/journey; confirm apology will come

○ Pen has 1 main suitor besides Colin who takes a real interest in her (Spoiler: it's Lord Debling)

○ Julia Quinn said it is a good friends to lovers story. She sounded so excited!

○ Someone (either Shonda, Julia or Jess) said they have some good awkward banter.

○ Julia Quinn really confirmed the Colin-Pen hand scene (1st real emotional and physically intimate scene for them)

○ How Jess B talks about Colin (again) gives me hope for his personal journey-mentioned about the 3rd son "not knowing his place in the world" & more

○ Protective El of Colin confirmed (we get El and Colin scenes), but she still loves Pen; Luke N. called it a non-romantic love triangle between the 3

○ Benedict takes roles of Anthony; he can fall into different roles very well, but who is he and what does he want?

○ Will and Alice acquire a new title this season; Martins talked about how they are "drawn out of the shadows"

○ Adjoa talked about how Lord Ledger affected her; called that romance "life-changing"; QCABS enriched Lady Danbury story coming into season 3

○ Lady D. personal journey-she's "shook" at an arrival that happens 👀

○ Golda-How do you do private intimacy in the view of the public (George and QC)? / she loves the Brimsley relationship

○ When talking about QC picking the diamond of the season said she's bored of what's going on and is "searching for something different"

○ [Other tidbit-they're hosting a Bridgerton wedding for a lucky real-life couple.]

○ Shonda quote about Bridgerton always "finding a way to give female characters agency" and Pen has a good way of coming into this in this season

○ Nicola-"so much happens" in their story

○ They talked about how the show has changed their lives-Claudia said she always walks away proud of what she's done and essentially there's not one part of the job she's unsatisfied with. aww; Adjoa said "a space for everyone"

○ Season 3 is "for the wallflowers"- Adjoa [they mentioned this a lot; the interaction on this between Adjoa and Nicola just made it seem like there is Lady Danbury-Pen relationship]

○ Nic and Newts recreated the pic in the mirror with candle stick!! what?! / They also watch fan edits and send them to each other

○ Easter egg in almost every episode according to Jess B. and they are "raising the bar on visuals"- "even brighter and more spectacular than ever"

○ Superlatives: most like character-Luke Newton; least-Golda; most bloopers-Johnny Bailey or Claudia (and I think she was offended at first, lol)

○ Chaos in Featherington fam because Pen steps out (Portia doesn't like when Pen changes from her citrus dresses)

○ Nicola "didn't expect to be as emotional as it was" from the first 2 episode screening

○ Adjoa said things will make you laugh then quickly after cry

○ Claudia said people make mistakes and people fall..., etc.

○ Theme: "Find your light." -Jess B.

○ The line in QCABS "We are untold stories" is what this season is about

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bloodynereid · 5 months

Note

Hi can I please request a Jordan x reader . Reader has power that glitch & saves Jordan. Reader hey I am lucky that I didn’t get stuck in between a wall.

Thank you.

Flying Grand Pianos - headcanons

pairing: jordan li x gn! reader

tw: cursing, mentions of uncontrolled powers, cate and sam went to prison (i'm sorry okay! they're my pookies but for this fic to work i had to do something), uh nothing much ig? unless u have a phobia of falling pianos... then maybe don't read this??

description: your powers come in handy in the weirdest situations.

a/n: hiii hopefully u enjoy this! i literally did not mean to make this as insane as it ended up being but hey i'm sick and running on like too little sleep, i hope it's still entertaining tho cause i had sm fun writing this lol. i tried to integrate everything you said into headcanons cause it felt more apt ? ig... anyways requests are open & lmk ur thoughts <3

It was your final year at God U, somehow you had actually made it through the insanity that happened during junior year. You had even come out of the whole situation with a whole new group of friends… even if Cate and Sam sort of had to be locked away because of all the shit they did.

Thank whoever had decided to call the FBI because you had no idea how the entire situation might have turned out if Homelander showed up instead.

So life had turned back to normal towards the end of junior year, mostly because Vought was able to keep most of the situation quiet. Now you were only a step away from becoming an actual superhero… which was a strange situation to think about.

Your powers weren’t all that noteworthy but were insanely useful in battle and to get out of awkward conversations… especially since you were able to mostly control them.

You had the ability to glitch, which essentially meant you could manipulate the fabric of reality around you and mess with it (always with a limit of course, you weren’t an all-powerful magician). You mostly used it for teleportation or to mess with people, something that was always sooo worth it.

You also were kind of insanely good at dealing with actual glitches in computers, which made absolutely no sense but it did help adding to your skill set for your major.

There was probably one specific time where your powers worked in your favor in the best way possible. Over the past few years you sort of developed a tiny little miniscule (HUGE) crush on Jordan Li and now that you were actually able to call them your friend that tiny little crush grew into something way bigger.

What you weren’t aware of was that Jordan felt the same way, they always viewed you as this pretty incredible supe but never really had the chance to talk to you… until the whole The Woods situation. After that it almost made it harder for them to just ask you out on your date… because you had created such a tentative but strong friendship - something that Jordan hadn’t had since Luke. Something that they weren’t sure they would be able to walk away from again.

It was a few months into your senior year when the incident happened. It wasn’t something crazy like Homelander suddenly massacring the school instead it was an incident that belonged in the halls of a supe school… one of the new freshmen had somehow conjured up a piano in the middle of the damn sky and was unable to make it disappear.

The one problem with this piano was that it was falling... and falling really fucking fast.

You had been drinking one of your favorite drinks from Jitter Bean when you were surprised (and very concerned) to see a piano making its way towards Jordan - a very distracted Jordan who was talking, or rather yelling into their phone.

It barely took you a second to make the decision before you dropped your drink and glitched in Jordan’s direction - thank whatever all powerful force was out there for actually having it work because a moment later you reappeared next to Jordan and grabbed their arm before glitching again.

Suddenly you were standing in your room and Jordan was looking at you like an insane person before a loud crash and a whole bunch of yelling was heard outside the window.

Jordan shot a confused look before darting over to the window, only to find that a huge grand piano now stood (well not really it was sort of everywhere) where they had just been standing a moment ago.

You shot them a sheepish smile as they turned around to look at you with a dropped jaw.

“I actually can’t believe that worked, I’m lucky I didn’t accidentally get us stuck between a wall.”

lol i have no idea what this is but i like it anyways.

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hunterbunter3000 · 11 months

Note

Okay so, since Krueger is obsessed with Sweetheart. Does that make him a Yandere? I mean like after he first met her and is with her like lost puppy. Does one of the men’s notice his behavior?

Oh damn... I guess so? 🫢🫢🤔🤔🤔🤔 he does have yandere tendencies. Wow I guess I made him a Yandere 😭😭 BUT LIKE-- HE WOULDNT KILL JUST BECAUSE?? like "just because you talked to Sweetheart I wouldn't kill you immediately, I would just threaten you and be intimidating so you can back off and not make a move on my future wife." But if you hurt Sweetheart then yeah you're done. DONE.

And he isn’t the type to be “if I can’t have you, no one can” and kill off Sweetheart, or be the type to lock her in the basement or have sadistic punishments. GOD NO

He would throw up if he ever tHOUGHT of hurting Sweetheart like that. (He has gotten on his knees, legit sobbing like he lost a family member, and apologizing to her because he slapped her when she accidentally startled him— it was a reflex and Sweets understood but Kruger did not stop crying. And then he bought her a designer purse 💀) he’s just a really big love drunk guy that treats his future love like a fucking goddess.

He listens to Sweetheart only, (and Graves I guess because thats his boss) so whatever she says goes. She says to leave her alone? Alright I'll give you some space. (Even tho he would be crying) she says to beat up that guy cause he disrespected her capitan? Done and done. She says to stop threatening strangers that come up to her? ...eehhhh that's gonna be hard, but I'll do it.

He does it because he wants to please her. Like a lot.

It’s unhealthy how attached he is to her, but he’s still respectful. He doesn’t want to lose her, but he also doesn’t want to be alone anymore. Does that even make sense lol

But yeah, I guess he is a yandere. BUT LIKE A SOFT YANDERE WHO UNDERSTANDS SOME BOUNDARIES

And good lord, everyone notices every time Krueger is around. Especially König (since they're step-brothers in this) König has always seen Krueger act like this, but not to a person, so it was shocking to see that happen.

He's so restless and snappy when Sweetheart isn't around and always asks where she is and why she isn't here yet. And one time, Ghost is like "Calm down mate. She's just running some errands." And Krueger just tenses, and you can see in his body language that he's getting angry. "By herself? You let her go by herself!? Where? Which store!? Fuck!" And he storms out of the lounging area. That was when they all knew that Krueger had a different kind of love for Sweetheart. And was waaayyyyy different than them. They feel a bit awkward with him because they know he's unhinged and a bit psycho, especially when it comes to Sweetheart. He's a very skilled soldier and will not hesitate to rip and tear everyone that is around her in a heartbeat. And they know Krueger's distain towards them, except with Ghost, Roach and König, Krueger just toys around with him like the annoying big brother he is. With Ghost, he's kind of friends with because he knows that Ghost will sacrifice everything for Sweetheart just like him. And they also have somethings in common- like torturing people and watching football. (soccer) With Roach, Krueger likes him because he's quiet and has sadistic tendencies when it comes to fighting enemies.

(He doesn't like when Roach hangs off of Sweetheart tho)

He gets jealous and irritated easily when he doesn't get his way when Sweetheart is around them. Like with Soap, he HATES Soap so much omfg- that is his enemy. He sees how close they are to each other and sees how Soap touches her and vice versa (he has many violent fantasies when it comes to Soap. König knows about this and purposely makes him avoid the two when they are together) those two butt heads CONSTANTLY

Like one more word from that Scottish dumbass and he will put him under bro 💀

They see how clingy Krueger is when she gets back from a mission, especially a solo mission omg

He would just hug her from behind and sway back and forth, his hood draping over her head as well as his (the hood that she made him is huge) and Soap can hear him whisper praises to her and her giggles. He can also hear Krueger kissing Sweetheart. Where? He doesn't know. Hopefully, not on the lips. WHY ARE THEY SO CUTE TO ME WTFF

And Krueger will not. Let. Her go. AT ALL. Like if he comes over to their side of the base, Krueger takes allllll of the attention from her (I talked about this before) especially if they're taking a nap together, like he's sitting on the couch with Sweetheart cradled in his lap, asleep on his broad shoulder as his arms hold her. Gaz fucking hates when they take naps together, especially when he sees their breathing in sync (Like FUCK OFF) So one time, Gaz was sick of it. He reaches for Sweetheart but Krueger tightens his hold on her, and he growls so fucking low and animalistic like a damn rabid dog protecting its owner-- it legit scared him. (Especially when you can't see his face 💀) And Krueger just says, "mine." In the lowest voice Gaz has ever heard-- he just backs up and leaves (AND WASN'T HE SUPPOSED TO BE ASLEEP??? LIKE IS HE MAGICAL-)

Krueger is something else yall 💀 can't wait to write more of him with Sweetheart 🤭🤭

#hes delulu yall #and a soft yandere too i guess LOL #DIDNT EVEN NOTICE IT AT FIRST TBH #sebastian krueger x reader #krueger x reader #call of duty #sebastian krueger #black fem reader #cod x y/n #141 sweetheart #141 sweetheart x krueger #hunter's ask lounge ☕️

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thefiery-phoenix · 1 month

Text

YANDERE EUNTAE LEE(VASCO) HEADCANONS

Words cannot describe how much I adore this cinnamon roll and simp for this man. Cue the pterodactyl hyper fangirling and screeching from my side for him lol. One picture wouldn't do this buff cinnamon roll justice so I had to go all out for him

Look, he's an absolute cinnamon roll. He's also a romantic at heart. When he lays his eyes on you, that's when he realizes you're the one. He's a bit awkward and shy around girls but with you, he's all the more shy. It's almost adorable how flustered he gets when someone mentions you to him. Yet he's at a conflict with himself, he's worried that if he confesses to you you'll end up rejecting him. Which is why he has his loyal Burn Knuckles gang members to help him back him up. Vasco as a yandere would be extremely clingy, over protective, obsessive and possessive

He can't stand it when people look down on others. He can't stand bad guys. So what does he do when he sees you getting bullied or harassed by someone? He doesn't hesitate to jump into a fight to be your knight in shining armor despite all the bruises and wounds he's received. He just wants to protect you, keeping you safe and protecting you is always his number one priority. When you thanked him with that cute and adorable smile of yours, he swore he felt his heart stop beating and visions of you both getting married and having a little golden retriever as a pet and having a family together flashed in his mind. Which probably explained why he was so flustered and kept blushing like a tomato the whole time

He'll stare at you like you've descended from the heavens when you compliment him on his tattoos. You actually like them? Oh, you like his hair and his style too? Are you even a real person? You're an angel in his eyes. An angel who can do nothing wrong. Now, his mind will be occupied with you and of course his right hand man Jace would obviously know something is up with him. When he realizes Vasco's feelings of love for you exceed the usual and normal feelings of love, he calls an emergency meeting with the rest of the Burn knuckles members. Not because they're worried about his obsessive feelings of love for you that are getting out of control, rather, because they need to make sure you belong to Vasco no matter what. They're his loyal friends and family who'll be willing to follow him to the ends of the earth, you really think they wouldn't do whatever it takes to make him happy by ensuring you're with Vasco?

The Burn Knuckles members take their job quite seriously in making sure you're Vasco's. "Hey Jace...who's that lousy moron hitting on them?'' asked Ira Oh as he kept staring at you being hit on by some random jerk. Jace narrowed his eyes. "He obviously needs to be dealt with" said Jace as he and the rest of the Burn knuckles members would surround the guy and ask him to leave you the hell alone. Vasco won't be the one stalking you, his members will, to find out everything about you and to ensure you don't break their dear leader's heart

The first time you and Vasco went out together the Burn Knuckles members followed secretly after you both and stalked you guys during the whole thing. Vasco still might be a little awkward around you but that doesn't mean he doesn't love you. You're always occupied in his mind and heart. You'll be the only one to have that special place in his heart. If you end up tripping over something this chivalrous cinnamon roll here would catch you instantly. He's a shy yet chivalrous gentleman to you. However when it comes to other people hurting you, yeah...he'll ensure they get sent to the hospital. He doesn't care if he gets hurt, his motto is to protect. To protect you no matter what. He doesn't care if you're a good fighter or whatever, he will not allow you to join a fight at any cost. If you end up getting hurt he'll feel extremely guilty and seeing a wound or an injury on you will just end up breaking his soft heart. He's driven by the passion to protect you and keep you safe and he does it seriously

He likes giving you cute little gifts that he knows you might like. His heart flutters in joy whenever you smile at him and thank him. He likes giving you chocolate milk too everyday. If someone else makes the mistake of giving you chocolate milk, he'll just get pouty and sulky for a while and get grumpy about it and he'll buy some more chocolate milk for you and hand it to you while the rest of the Burn knuckles have a 'friendly' chat with the guy. He'll always cherish and treasure whatever you've made for him. You gave him a handmade card once and he almost cried from pure joy, it was like the gods answered his prayers. He'll always treasure your little gifts, they're made with affection and love for him. What sort of man would he be if he couldn't cherish the gifts of his future spouse?

He wouldn't do something too extreme like kidnapping you but he will do whatever it takes to ensure you're his. He can't lose you, he doesn't want to lose you to someone else. With all the nonsense he's had to endure in his past, he knows someone as innocent and fragile and angelic like you would simply get chewed out and spat out and used by the world. Let him be your protector and knight in shining armor

Would definitely love to have a family with you one day. If someone dares to snatch away that dream from him with you, he'll get quite mad. He'd like to come home to you hugging him and greeting him and having cuddle sessions on the couch with each other, as you run your fingers through his hair while the golden retriever puppy of yours naps on the couch next to you both. Married life with him would be so blissful, like heaven on earth. He'll be the best husband for you, along with his possessive and obsessive tendencies of course

You're the cute and innocent little thing he's sworn to protect. And a true man always abides by his word and promise no matter what and what sort of man would he be if he couldn't protect the one that resides in his heart?

#yandere vasco #yandere vasco x reader #yandere vasco headcanons #yandere vasco scenarios #yandere vasco oneshots #yandere vasco imagines #yandere euntae lee x reader #yandere euntae lee headcanons #yandere euntae lee oneshots #yandere euntae lee imagines #yandere lookism #yandere lookism x reader #yandere lookism characters x reader #yandere lookism characters #lookism #lookism x reader

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batneko · 4 months

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I'm forced to listen to Christmas music all day at work, so here's a Last Christmas bowuigi idea for your enjoyment featuring everyone's favorite* trope: misunderstandings!

*(lol nope)

Bowser has unintentionally achieved "friendly rival" status, and is invited to a big lodge to go skiing and snowboarding for a week. He still feels awkward around everyone, but they're all pretty welcoming, and he's not even the only former antagonist invited. Still, he's not quite willing to mingle with the whole crowd, and finds himself spending more and more time with fellow wallflower Luigi.

Luigi is a good listener. So good, in fact, that Bowser finds himself opening up a lot more than he meant to. So good that even Bowser realizes he's been dominating all their conversations. By the end of the week he thinks they're getting along well enough that he might actually call Luigi a friend.

Then, on the last day, he gets a note from Luigi asking him to meet in private. He's happy to do it. Looking forward to it, even. Maybe he can make things more balanced between them by listening to whatever it is that's so important. It had to be preceded with a note.

Then Luigi confesses that he has feelings for him. And Bowser doesn't believe it.

He's certain that this is a prank, and furious that Luigi would toy around with him like that. So he tears into him, breaking down all the reasons he would never even consider a relationship with him. He gets mean. He gets personal.

By the end both of them are heartbroken and convinced they were wrong about each other.

A year passes. Bowser is still sort of kind of friends with the others, and still gets invited to things, but he doesn't talk to Luigi at all. Bowser doesn't know who else was in on the "prank," so he's back to being cautious about who to trust.

Luigi and Mario are close, but they don't tell each other everything about their dating lives, so Mario doesn't press when a depressed Luigi says he got rejected and he'll get over it eventually.

He does, mostly, but seeing Bowser doesn't help, especially since the crush never quite goes away. There's a part of him that knows - even if he thinks it'll never happen - that if Bowser changed his mind Luigi would jump at the chance.

Next winter there's another trip to the ski lodge, and Bowser is invited, and Luigi resolves to put it all behind him and move on. Ask someone else out. Someone... safe.

But Bowser sees that Luigi has his eye on somebody else, and all the anger he thought he'd gotten over rises up again. How dare he act like nothing happened? How dare he think he can just have a normal holiday fling, as if he didn't use that exact premise to shatter Bowser's heart last year?

So Bowser starts blatantly flirting with Luigi whenever they're in a group. Compliments, playful teasing, one or two double-entendres. Whenever Luigi tries to talk to Bowser alone, Bowser walks away and refuses to say a word, but the rest of the gang think that Bowser is Staking His Claim.

The plan works, and Luigi's hopes of a new relationship are dashed before they can really start. The worst part is that the first time it happened Luigi had almost fallen for it. If he hadn't seen the glare Bowser shot him when nobody was looking, he might have done something foolish. Like flirt back.

It's a week of torture, but finally on the last day Luigi manages to corner Bowser and confront him. Ask him why he's doing this, why he feels like he needs to ruin Luigi's chances.

"Are you kidding? After what you did to me last year? You think I'd just forget?" "What I did to you?" "You didn't think I fell for that, did you? I don't know if you were recording it or if someone was waiting to jump out and laugh at me, but-" "You thought it was a prank?" "Yes! ...wasn't it?"

It takes some time (and some more yelling) but eventually Bowser accepts that Luigi wasn't lying, and they both have to re-think the entire last year... as well as what they know about each other. Bowser realizing that he was right the first time about how nice Luigi is, and that he could have had something great if he hadn't jumped to conclusions. And Luigi realizing that if Bowser thought a genuine confession was a cruel joke he's probably not nearly as confident as he acts.

"Give me a second chance," Bowser blurts out. "You're interested? After everything you said about me last year?" "I was mad, I was ranting, I don't even remember what I said." "I do." "Give me... a third chance."

Luigi says he needs time, Bowser (reluctantly) says okay, but also says he will do anything to make it up to Luigi. Favors, public humiliation, anything.

"If you still think I'm the kind of person who wants you to publicly humiliate yourself, you really don't understand me at all."

Neither of them sleeps well. In the morning while everyone is packing up, Bowser sees Luigi step into a quiet corner with the person he'd been planning to confess to this year. He's practically steaming from jealousy, but Bowser forces himself to stay away. He's not going to get a fourth chance.

But as he's about to leave, Bowser is stopped by Luigi. He hands him a scrap of paper with his phone number, and beckons him closer.

"Kiss me." "You sure?" "My brother is watching. So is the princess. You know what it'll mean if you do it, so..."

Bowser doesn't have to be asked twice.

He does get punched thirty seconds in as soon as Mario puts everything together, but it's worth it.

#bowuigi #luigi #bowser #super mario bros #luwser #bowigi #green shell

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chaotic-archaeologist · 9 months

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got a question for ya regarding sex and online safety.

Background; I am an adulty adult. I have been able to and have voted in more than 3 elections. [I know you take interactions with minors seriously]. I am also ace and autistic. as a result I have never felt the urge to date and I normally don't mind having friends close by.

However, I also just moved for the 4th time since 2019 and would like to meet people.

So I downloaded Grindr. already got my first dickpic lol. I have also been chatting with a fellow who I like and would like to be friends with and I also wouldn't mind exploring my kinks with people... but I have never had to worry about safe online sexy stuff before so I don't know the basics beyond normal internet safety.

What do I do‽‽‽

Okay first, thanks for clarifying the adulty part. This is an awesome question, and here's the advice/steps that I personally follow for situations like this.

Have your first meeting in a public place. Go for coffee or ice cream or lunch or dinner or whatever. But don't meet them alone. This way, if you get uncomfortable with anything that's happening, they're much less likely to continue with that behavior after you attempt to extricate yourself.

Make sure there are no expectations. Plan not to have sex on the first date/meet up. Grindr often tends to ignore this rule since it's very hookup centric, but you're absolutely within your rights to insist on taking things as slowly as you want to.

Don't rely on the other person for transportation. If you choose to meet someone, get yourself there and plan to get yourself back. Walk, bike, drive, public transportation, unicycle, it's all good. But there's much less room for pressure if you're not depending on them for a ride home. This segues nicely into my next point:

Do not tell them where you live. At least, not right now. Plenty of people on Grindr are willing to "host" meaning you can come to their place. That's fine for them, but I err on the side of never giving anyone my address until I've had a thorough chance to assess their character and meet them a few times.

Tell someone where you will be. Let someone who cares about you know that you're going out, where you'll be, and what time you expect to return. Establish a time to check in when you're going home/if you choose to extend the meeting. There are also apps like Noonlight that can function similarly.

Be careful about what you consume. If you're going to enjoy and mind alternating substances, be very, very careful. This goes for anything from getting drinks at a bar to any and all of the recreational drugs on the market.

Be prepared for a little bit of awkwardness. Meeting someone in person is often very different than chatting online. If the conversation is awkward or halting, that's okay. Give it a little time (but also don't be afraid to trust your gut if it's telling you something is wrong).

Communicate clearly. If you have any needs—which can range from an allergy, not being able to stand for long periods of time, needing them to speak loudly so you can hear them, safety concerns—the best way to get those met is to be upfront. You don't need to disclose the reason why you need something if it makes you uncomfortable, just state what you need. People worth spending time with will respect that. The same thing goes for your wants.

Use protection. Maybe this isn't applicable for you specifically, but I think it belongs on this list. Condoms. Dental dams. Gloves. Someone on an app telling you they're negative for any number of things is not an actual guarantee they're not lying to you. Not wanting to use protection (not just for anal/vaginal intercourse, but for oral sex as well) is a huge red flag. Decide in advance what your boundaries are and stick to them.

If it sucks, hit da bricks. Fundamentally, you owe this person nothing. There is no consequence for saying "you know what, I'm not feeling this and I'm going to leave." Be as polite as you want to, but put yourself first.

At the end of the day, the only thing you have control over is you. How you react, where you meet this person, what you do—that's what you control. Hopefully any meet ups will be fun and relatively safe, but just in case, set yourself up for success by maintaining what control you can.

From one adult to another, these are all suggestions rather than rules. Many people on Grindr choose not to follow various ones, and that's fine. Take some time to think about what you're comfortable with and make your decisions accordingly.

Also, best practice for someone sending an unsolicited dick pic (if you don't want them) is just to block that person. But sending a return picture like this one is a hilarious option.

-Reid

#he speaks #sex advice #sex education #internet advice #life advice #grindr #internet etiquette #internet brother

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things-arent-what-they-seem66 · 4 days

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I have a fluffy idea for once! No prompts from the list, just brain thoughts:

Adam has been staying in the hotel for a few months, very reluctant to participate at first, but slowly warming up to it. Him and Lucifer had a long conversation about Eden at some point, and since then they've gotten increasingly domestic with each other. While they're not openly in a relationship, they'll sleep in the same bed, have movie nights together, cook together, and be generally affectionate. They try to be subtle about it, but Husk and Angel both picked up on it rather quickly, choosing to keep it between the two of them that they knew.

Cut to the moment: Charlie set up a bonding activity for hotel residents! Ballroom dancing, to build teamwork, trust, and coordination. They switch partners a few times, but of course Luci and Adam end up together eventually. The two of them, having both been important figures in heaven at some point, definitely have ballroom dancing experience, and it shows when they dance with each other. Once the music reaches its end, they're so caught up in each other that they end it with a kiss... in front of everyone. Ensue dramatic reveals, probably some flustered Adam, Charlie being baffled, momentarily angry, and then just really enthusiastic. Them finally getting to be saccharinely domestic with others present :))

Feel free to do with that what you will, I just wanted some domestic fluff <3

Indigo (aroace, lonely, and coping through fictional ships)

AHHHHH I LOVE THIS!!! IT'S SO FLUFFY IM GONNA DIE! LOL

At first Adam was only at the hotel for salvation, to not be murdered a million times over by blood thirsty sinners who wanted revenge.

He tolerated Charlie and her stupid exercises, he was present for them but never really participated. Until one day he said to Hell with it and gave one of them a try. It wasn't bad, but still dumb in his opinion.

At some point he had befriended the porn star Angel Dust and by proxy his boyfriend Husk. Turns out they had a lot more in common than Adam originally thought. They would go out drinking and shoot the shit, it was nice to have friends.

Lucifer was an issue in and of himself. He sold his soul to the guy in exchange for protection and it had been awkward being around him in the beginning.

It's been six months now and Lucifer said he wanted to talk to him. Adam has thought he was in trouble for something he might have done.

But no. The king wanted to talk about Eden. REALLY talk about Eden. He even apologized for his role for the downfall of the garden. They sat on Lucifer's bed talking for hours about Eden, the good and the bad. When he even apologized about taking Lilith, Adam told him not to worry about it. It took him leaving the garden to realize she wasn't his type.

They talked so long they fell asleep. That was the first time they shared a bed and from then on, it felt weird NOT to. So they just shared a bed, it just kind of happened.

Adam remembers the first time they cooked together, it was breakfast with the works. That's kind of how he found out he is shit at cooking. So instead he would hand Lucifer the ingredients and the King would cook the food. He remembers when Lucifer placed his hands on his hips to sneak by and how the touch made Adams heart race.

Adam and Lucifer shared lingering touches that lasted a moment or two too long. How their eyes would lock and they would share gentle smiles when they thought no one was looking.

Angel and Husk saw all of this but didn't say a word. The couple would go public when they were ready.

One thing Adam could make was microwave popcorn. Which him and Lucifer shared as they watched horror movies, snuggled up on the couch, sharing a blanket with their fingers laced together underneath. Adam's head would rest in the crook of Lucifer's shoulder. Sometimes Adam would fall asleep and wake up in their bed.

They weren't exclusive with a defined label, but what they did have was nice.

Today, Charlie wanted to do a new trust exercise. "We'll be doing ballroom dancing! It's a great way to build trust and have fun at the same time. Now, everyone grab a partner. We'll trade off every now and then."

"Piece of cake." Adam said, he had lots of dancing experience from being in heaven. What he didn't expect was to be teamed up with Alastor first. "Keep your fucking hands where I can see them, asshole."

"Trust me, I don't want to touch you any more than you want me touching you." The music started and they began dancing. Adam saw Alastors eyes look over his shoulder, that's when the radio demon brought him in closer. His hand on Adams waist, the fallen angel thought he might be sick. "But if it pisses him off, I suppose I can suck it up."

Adam creased his brow and looked over his shoulder behind him. If looks could kill, Lucifer would have had the deer demon explode into chuck sized pieces. His face softened when he saw Adam looking at him.

"Switch!" Charlie called out.

Now Adam was dancing with Vaggie, much better than that freak. They didn't speak the whole time, which was fine.

"Switch!"

This time, finally Adam was pulled into Lucifer's arms. He smiled at him as they swayed together in perfect harmony, the music moving them. "Hey."

"Hey, did that asshole hurt you?"

Adam snorted. "No, that was just to piss you off." He felt Lucifers arm tighten around his waist bringing him closer. "But if I said yes, would you beat that fucker up?"

"I'd do it just because he touched you." Lucifer meant it, he didn't need a real reason to go deer hunting, but if that fucker laid a hand on Adam he'd kill him.

Adam felt his heart flutter, butterflies danced in his stomach. "I feel so special."

Lucifer twirled Adam outward and pulled him back in. "You are special. To me especially."

They stared into each other's eyes, Adam could get lost there forever. It's like nothing else existed but them. The music stopped but they didn't let go of one another. Adam and Lucifer kept eye contact a few moments more before Adam felt a hand in his hair, with half lidded eyes he looked at Lucifer's lips as he looked at Adam's. The hand in his hair guided him closer until their lips met in a tender kiss.

Adam opened his mouth when Lucifer's tongue licked at his lips asking for entrance and deepening the kiss. Adam sighed softly as the hand in his hair grazed the base of his horns, his own hands clung to Lucifer's shoulders holding him close.

"Dad what the fuck!?"

Adam and Lucifer pulled apart like they had been burned. Oh no! Everyone fucking saw them makeout like a couple of teenagers. They shared looks of shock. They never slipped up like this. They turned to see everyone looking at them with varying degrees of emotions.

"I fucking called it." Angel said looking smug, Husk handed him a twenty.

Adam felt like his face was on fire, embarrassment starting to set in. He was getting uncomfortable with everyone looking at him like a fucking zoo exhibit.

"Charlie I can explain." Lucifer started.

"Explain what? That you've been seeing Adam behind my back and didn't tell me? Cause that was a very passionate kiss."

Adam wanted to die a third time. He put his face in his hands. He was sure all the blood in his body was in his face. "God dammit." He swore under his breath.

"Charlie, dear. Don't be mad, I didn't want to say anything to you until I was sure how I felt."

"How do you feel?" She asked.

Lucifer removed one of Adams hands from his face, Adam looked at him and swore he melted at how gentle that look was. "I, I care a lot about him. Adam makes me happy in a way I haven't felt in a long time."

Adam felt the same way. "So do I." It came out just above a whisper, just for Lucifer to hear. His smile was so wide it hurt his face.

Charlie looked at them and her temper simmered away into nothing. Oh. "I'm glad you're happy dad. I just wish this wasn't how I found out about you guys."

"I'm sorry Char, we kinda, got lost in the moment."

"Like right now?" Angel chimed in. "For the record, you guys dance amazing together. I can only imagine what it looks like when you fu- ow! Husk!"

Husk had pinched him. "No one wants that mental picture."

"Are you mad?" Adam finally asked.

Charlie sighed. "All I want is for my dad to be happy. If that's with you, then so be it. Just don't hurt each other." That would be one hell of a break up.

"Thank you, Charlie." Lucifer said. He pulled Adam back in for another kiss, this one sweet and soft. Adam's heart raced and thrummed with joy.

"Get a room you two!" Angel yelled.

That they could definitely do.

#adamsapple #lucifer x adam #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lucifer #ask

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