Wow, I might be late on the Super Mario movie, but I'ma be straight up honest, that was my least favorite movie of the last five years, roughly. Sorry to be negative right after praising John Wick, Dungeons and Dragons, and Power Rangers, but man did this rip me down to Earth after that high point. This was a boring, predictable slog with mediocre performances (Jack Black included), a script with zero thought, and the worst humor I've seen in an animated movie in years.
I think there are exactly two things I liked about it: that it was colorful, and that it included plentiful references to Nintendo properties that were often used as creative camera shots, e.g. a side-scrolling camera setup. But even then, the references lack soul. If the panned "Epic Movie" pair of Friedberg and Seltzer taught us anything, it's that you can't just throw blatant references at a screen and assume everyone will eat it up. There has to be subtlety or humor to it. Chip and Dale got this right by using tons of properties and using them sparingly with quick, rapid-fire jokes that subvert your expectations about how cartoons would work. The references in Mario don't have that humor or nearly that much creativity. It seems as if the writers made a list of references ahead of time and sloppily wrote a script around it.
The script, incidentally, feels like it was written by an AI, or perhaps a child that never watched anything past 2000s Nickelodeon. It is so riddled with tired tropes and cliches that I was mouthing the lines ahead of time, before they were spoken. It's so formulaic that you can tell exactly how each character will respond to anything before the line comes out of their mouth. I've seen kid-oriented movies and shows that do this, but never to this massive extent. I was practically predicting every single plot point before it happened so absolutely nothing surprised me.
I tried to find some excitement in the action and set pieces, but even those were dull to watch and predictable. There were so many instances of slow-mo a la Zach Snyder, that it ultimately just felt arbitrarily thrown in, and broke up what fun there was to be had. Even the Rainbow Road kart sequence was chaotic and uninteresting. Maybe this all would be forgivable with some humor, but my god, I didn't laugh a single time. There were so many opportunities to put something funny into the script, and all were wasted. Often times they come close to being funny, but end up sucking out the humor by having Donkey Kong do a Seth Rogen laugh in response, or having another character yell at them, as if to say, "that was a joke, please laugh."
The performances weren't even enough to amuse. I can say that Renfield wasn't a hilarious movie, but Nic Cage's performance was so well done and entertaining that it was still laughable, so I know that Mario could potentially make up for lack of humor with entertaining performances. Unfortunately, the characters have no chemistry and feel like they're there only to deliver lines in sequence and nothing more. Jack Black was clearly brought in to ham it up with no direction, as he wastes time singing a boring song about Peach, which they apparently thought was so funny that they had him sing it twice in the movie. Even Jim Carrey, the king of annoying ham, didn't ham it up when playing Dr. Robotnik across two Sonic movies as much as Black did while playing Bowser. Keegan Michael Key as Toad is, dare I say it, reminiscent of Jar Jar Binks. He's completely useless, even causing much of the conflict in the third act, is pretty much always ignored when he delivers terrible one-liners, and has a voice that I'm certain was modified to be higher and to make it more annoying. Chris Pratt has phoned in his performances for the last 4 years or so, and this isn't that much different, albeit not one of his worst performances, as he at least attempts a Brooklyn accent. Anya Taylor Joy is a great actress but has a low, dark voice that's meant for drama, and not for a feminine cartoon princess. Her performance as Peach is sadly mostly monotone.
I'll finish by bringing up the whole argument about how Peach is handled as a character, because I do have a stance on this. I expected that it was hated by right-wingers for being too feminist by making her strong, but it actually ended up being worse than I expected. Aside from maybe Mario's mom, she's the only named female character in the movie, and Bowser's evil plan is nothing more than to marry her, which basically puts this at the writing level of a movie written the same year as the NES game's release. Thus, the writers needed to make her strong for female representation to counteract the outdated plot, but ended up completely failing at feminism and empowerment by making her flawless to an uninspiring degree, and with no personality, charisma, or chemistry with other characters. I feel in their attempt to be feminist, they backfired and showed how little they understand female characterization.
It's amazing how nearly every single aspect of this film disappointed me, even as someone who preaches that the video game adaptation curse has been over for 5 years. I went in expecting something middle of the road, so I don't think I was influenced by any preconceived notion of how it would be. It boggles my mind that this is now the highest grossing animated film of all time. I can understand this being catered to young kids, but if Sonic can be fun for the whole family, and even Minions can be funny at times, was this just made for literal toddlers? That's the only excuse I can think of. Sorry again to be so negative, but I'm really quite rattled by this movie, and with how badly animation is being disrespected by film companies, I feel this is only going to reinforce that disrespect, and I need to express that.
#FAVCRITECRIIME; an indie multi canon divergent rp blog for muses from various fandoms such as WOLF PACK, TVDU, SPN, TW & more; slow & selective; written by nini; +28, she/her, CET ( this is a sideblog to frxgmcnts ) — beta editor user / personal blogs DNI! - ~ low activity ~
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I've watched three movies today. First time since probably the last time i went to the theater with my kid sister to see Black Panther II, that i could actually chill out and enjoy a film (or three) like this. The last five months have been a straight up clusterf*ck and I'm just glad there is a sense of normalcy to my life again. Seriously, between getting “evicted”, having to stress about moving, getting “fired”, and then starting this new job, i feel like this is the first time in a long time, I've had the opportunity to just breathe. To just relax. o be honest, I'm still a ways off from actually getting back to the theater in person for proper releases, mostly trying to save for a new car and furniture right now, but we’re getting there. Hopefully by the time The Marvels drops, I'll be good to go but we’ll see. In the meantime, here’s a bullet points of the films i watched today and how i flt about them.
Renfield
I liked this one. It was fun and a genuinely unique take on the Dracula myth. It plays as kind of a sequel to that old Bela Lugosi outing but it works. Like, it really works. Obviously, the star of this thing is Nic Cage’s take on the Prince of Wallachia but Holt’s Renfield was fun and i even enjoyed Awkwafina in small doses. It’s weird that she keeps getting pushed as the romantic interest to me, though. They did it in Shang-Chi and they did it in this. It’s like, there’s this romantic tension, a subtext of attraction, but they never really let that sh*t evolve. She’s just the plucky sidekick who very obviously has feelings for the protagonist but they never get together. I dunno if that’s by choice of the fact that she isn’t “classically attractive” or whatever. Personally, i think she’s gorgeous and i adore her voice so this sh*t is just bogus in my eyes but whatever. Overall, Renfield is a fun, campy, over-the-top gory, pseudo-capeflick that has a lot of heart and great fight scenes. That said, Ben Schwartz is criminally underused and the whole Lobos gang angle needed more time in order to really have weight. Still, if you have an hour and a half to kill, it’s a good watch.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie
This new Mario movie is boring. I know it's "for kids" but that's not really an excuse, is it? The Lion King is for kids. Shrek is for kids. The Iron Giant is for kids. Kids films can be good. They can be entertaining. This was not. It wasn’t even a bad movie. There are things to love about this flick. Seth Green as Donkey Kong. Jack Black was excellent casting as Bowser. All of the little callbacks and easter eggs. That climax. All of that sh*t was great. Everything else was f*cking mid and i am offended that they think kids are so unsophisticated that they would just accept this mediocre sh*t. But, apparently, they did because this motherf*cker is the first billion dollar movie of the goddamn year and it ain’t even close! Like, Ant-Man III is the next highest grossing film and the motherf*cker can’t even cracked half a bil. F*cking how? Like, where was this enthusiasm for, say, Puss in Boots II? THAT sh*t was f*cking fantastic! You people should have spent your money on that because all this is saying to Hollywood is that you want derivative adaptions of existing IPs. That’s it. I want to be clear here: The Super Mario Bros. movie is not bad but ain’t ain’t good, either. It’s nothing. It’s a nothingburger of a film and the public at large should be ashamed for making it as successful as it is. Unless i get a Metroid flick out of this. Then i will suffer this billion dollar foolishness, no problem.
Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
This movie has no right to be as good as it is. Seriously, i had the best goddamn time with this thing. It is, unironically, one of the best fantasy outings i have ever seen in my life and is sitting at the top of my list of best film release this year. I was shocked by how dope this movie turned out to be. Seriously, there is just so much to like in this thing. From the adherence to the lore, the DnD easter eggs, detailed world-building, and accurate class attributes. I didn’t think this movie could cover so much ground and keep me interested but it did just that. The performances, from top to bottom, were fantastic. There was real chemistry among this actors and it made this film all the better for it. Look, I'm old as f*ck, right? i can say, with all certainty, that the DND film franchise was a joke until Honor dropped. Some of the worst movies i have ever seen were DND adaptions. Hell, even that old Eighties cartoon was dog sh*t. Not this movie, though. This thing was brilliant!
I've watched three movies today. First time since probably the last time i went to the theater with my kid sister to see Black Panther II, that i could actually chill out and enjoy a film (or three) like this. The last five months have been a straight up clusterf*ck and I'm just glad there is a sense of normalcy to my life again. Seriously, between getting “evicted”, having to stress about moving, getting “fired”, and then starting this new job, i feel like this is the first time in a long time, I've had the opportunity to just breathe. To just relax. o be honest, I'm still a ways off from actually getting back to the theater in person for proper releases, mostly trying to save for a new car and furniture right now, but we’re getting there. Hopefully by the time The Marvels drops, I'll be good to go but we’ll see. In the meantime, here’s a bullet points of the films i watched today and how i flt about them.
Renfield
I liked this one. It was fun and a genuinely unique take on the Dracula myth. It plays as kind of a sequel to that old Bela Lugosi outing but it works. Like, it really works. Obviously, the star of this thing is Nic Cage’s take on the Prince of Wallachia but Holt’s Renfield was fun and i even enjoyed Awkwafina in small doses. It’s weird that she keeps getting pushed as the romantic interest to me, though. They did it in Shang-Chi and they did it in this. It’s like, there’s this romantic tension, a subtext of attraction, but they never really let that sh*t evolve. She’s just the plucky sidekick who very obviously has feelings for the protagonist but they never get together. I dunno if that’s by choice of the fact that she isn’t “classically attractive” or whatever. Personally, i think she’s gorgeous and i adore her voice so this sh*t is just bogus in my eyes but whatever. Overall, Renfield is a fun, campy, over-the-top gory, pseudo-capeflick that has a lot of heart and great fight scenes. That said, Ben Schwartz is criminally underused and the whole Lobos gang angle needed more time in order to really have weight. Still, if you have an hour and a half to kill, it’s a good watch.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie
This new Mario movie is boring. I know it's "for kids" but that's not really an excuse, is it? The Lion King is for kids. Shrek is for kids. The Iron Giant is for kids. Kids films can be good. They can be entertaining. This was not. It wasn’t even a bad movie. There are things to love about this flick. Seth Green as Donkey Kong. Jack Black was excellent casting as Bowser. All of the little callbacks and easter eggs. That climax. All of that sh*t was great. Everything else was f*cking mid and i am offended that they think kids are so unsophisticated that they would just accept this mediocre sh*t. But, apparently, they did because this motherf*cker is the first billion dollar movie of the goddamn year and it ain’t even close! Like, Ant-Man III is the next highest grossing film and the motherf*cker can’t even cracked half a bil. F*cking how? Like, where was this enthusiasm for, say, Puss in Boots II? THAT sh*t was f*cking fantastic! You people should have spent your money on that because all this is saying to Hollywood is that you want derivative adaptions of existing IPs. That’s it. I want to be clear here: The Super Mario Bros. movie is not bad but ain’t ain’t good, either. It’s nothing. It’s a nothingburger of a film and the public at large should be ashamed for making it as successful as it is. Unless i get a Metroid flick out of this. Then i will suffer this billion dollar foolishness, no problem.
Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
This movie has no right to be as good as it is. Seriously, i had the best goddamn time with this thing. It is, unironically, one of the best fantasy outings i have ever seen in my life and is sitting at the top of my list of best film release this year. I was shocked by how dope this movie turned out to be. Seriously, there is just so much to like in this thing. From the adherence to the lore, the DnD easter eggs, detailed world-building, and accurate class attributes. I didn’t think this movie could cover so much ground and keep me interested but it did just that. The performances, from top to bottom, were fantastic. There was real chemistry among this actors and it made this film all the better for it. Look, I'm old as f*ck, right? i can say, with all certainty, that the DND film franchise was a joke until Honor dropped. Some of the worst movies i have ever seen were DND adaptions. Hell, even that old Eighties cartoon was dog sh*t. Not this movie, though. This thing was brilliant!
Oh, I don’t know. It’s not a life for kids anymore this, Seth. Not when there’s no mother in the house.
Paddy checks on Jack’s livestock as Jack opens up about potentially losing the farm (can’t imagine not waking up to all of it). Jack tries to put off paying Paddy (he has more than ‘one bill sat there’) until the end of next week, no excuses, as he just doesn’t have the money. Jack meets with Paul Renfield (the letter showed Renenfield in the prior episode) regarding cost efficiencies/returns for the land (‘there’s not much room sentiment left in this game’). Jack has a chat with Seth about the farm and what he’s gonna do with himself, maybe a 9 to 5’er. Seth can’t see it, Jack’s an old dog, just like him (‘no one’s as old as you’ Jack remarks 😂).
Chris Pine is in negotiations to star in a reboot of “The Saint,” a globe-trotting franchise-starter based on the 1920s novel series written by Leslie Charteris.
The movie follows Simon Templar, better known as The Saint, a Robin Hood-esque criminal and thief for hire who goes on a globetrotting adventure.
Dexter Fletcher (“Rocketman”) will direct the film and Seth Grahame-Smith wrote the script. Lorenzo Di Bonaventura (“Transformers,” “G.I. Joe) is producing along with Brad Krevoy and Mark Vahradian. Robert Evans, who served as a producer on the original film and died in 2019, also helped produce.
Paramount and Pine have had strong ties for many years. Their relationship goes back to 2009 when the studio hired him to play Captain Kirk in the latest “Star Trek” franchise, launching his career as a leading man in the process. While the fourth “Star Trek” film is still being developed, the studio saw “The Saint” as the perfect role for Pine as they wait for that script to be finished.
With the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic shutting down almost all film and TV projects, it’s unknown when “The Saint” would go into production. It seems likely that this would mark Fletcher’s next film with Pine’s commitment. The director had been developing several films since finishing “Rocketman,” including the Dracula pic “Renfield” at Universal, but this seems to be in first position now that Pine is attached.
“The Saint” is based on a 1920s book series of the same name by Leslie Charteris and was turned into a film in 1997 starring Val Kilmer. In addition to the Kilmer film, it inspired a 1960s TV show starring Roger Moore. Paramount sees the reboot as the potential start for a long-running movie series.
Pine is coming off the TNT limited series “We Are the Night,” which earned him strong reviews from the critics. He can be seen next reprising his role of Steve Trevor in “Wonder Woman: 1984,” which bows on Aug. 14. He most recently wrapped production on “Violence of Action” by Tarik Saleh.
Pine is repped by CAA, John Carrabino Management, Gendler & Kelly.
THE SAINT Remake Will Be Helmed By ROCKETMAN Director Dexter Fletcher
Dexter Fletcher, the director behind Rocketman, Bohemian Rhapsody, and Eddie The Eagle, has been hired by Paramount Pictures to direct their remake of Val Kilmer’s 1997 action thriller, The Saint. The film is based on the globe-trotting 1920s adventure novel series written by Leslie Charteris.
The script for the film was written by Seth Grahame-Smith (Dark Shadows, The LEGO Batman Movie), while it is being produced by Lorenzo Di Bonaventura (Transformers, G.I. Joe).
The movie follows Simon Templar (a.k.a. The Saint), a Robin Hood-esque criminal and thief for hire. While Paramount’s attempt to launch a film franchise in the ‘90s didn’t really work out, the studio “sees renewed potential for a long-running movie series.”
It’s been so long since I’ve seen the original movie, I don’t even remember if it was good or not. The fact that it didn’t make a lasting impression must say something.
Fletcher is also set to direct a Universal monster movie that focuses on the Dracula character, R.M. Renfield, an inmate at a lunatic asylum who was thought to be suffering from delusions, but is actually a servant of Dracula.
What do you think about Paramount trying to reboot The Saint? Do you remember the original film? If so, did you like it?
Nuovo post su italianaradio https://www.italianaradio.it/index.php/dexter-fletcher-dirigera-il-remake-de-il-santo/
Dexter Fletcher dirigerà il remake de Il Santo
Dexter Fletcher dirigerà il remake de Il Santo
Dexter Fletcher dirigerà il remake de Il Santo
Dopo il successo del film biografico su Elton John, Rocketman, la Paramount ha scelto il regista Dexter Fletcher per dirigere un altro progetto di alto profilo per lo studio.
Fletcher dirigerà Il Santo, un riavvio del thriller d’azione del 1997 con Val Kilmer. L’avventura, in giro per il mondo, si basa sulla serie di romanzi degli anni ’20 scritta da Leslie Charteris.
Seth Grahame-Smith ha scritto la sceneggiatura del film, mentre Lorenzo Di Bonaventura (Transformers, G.I. Joe) sta producendo insieme a Brad Krevoy e il compianto Robert Evans, che firmerà postumo il progetto.
Il film segue Simon Templar (a.k.a. Il Santo), un criminale alla Robin Hood e ladro a noleggio. Il personaggio del libro ha anche ispirato uno show televisivo degli anni ’60. Mentre l’adattamento cinematografico degli anni ’90 non ha dato il via a un franchise come sperato, lo studio vede un potenziale nel per una serie di film di lunga data.
Il Santo sarà il prossimo lavoro di Fletcher, dopo che il regista avrà firmato Renfield, un progetto della Universal che tenta ancora di rivitalizzare il suo Monsterverse. Il film sarà infatti incentrato sull’omonimo personaggio presente nella storia di Dracula. I dettagli della trama sono attualmente sconosciuti, anche se si ritiene che il film sia ambientato ai giorni nostri.
Si tratta di un momento d’oro per Dexter Fletcher, che dopo aver ereditato Bohemian Rhapsody dal licenziato Bryan Singer, ha confermato il suo folgorante successo con Rocketman.
Fonte: Variety
Cinefilos.it – Da chi il cinema lo ama.
Dexter Fletcher dirigerà il remake de Il Santo
Dopo il successo del film biografico su Elton John, Rocketman, la Paramount ha scelto il regista Dexter Fletcher per dirigere un altro progetto di alto profilo per lo studio. Fletcher dirigerà Il Santo, un riavvio del thriller d’azione del 1997 con Val Kilmer. L’avventura, in giro per il mondo, si basa sulla serie di romanzi […]