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maximwtf · 6 months

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izzy x reader fluff plpease. maybe first kiss????. i am thinking maybe starts off in angst where the reader is rly tired and distancing themself but izzy finds them and is really nice and supportive and shit. bonus points if reader runs off at some point to hide in stede's closet.(idk i find the idea of reader who wears black all the time secretly fucking loving stede's pastels to be amazing) sorry if this made 0 sense

Izzy Hands x Reader

Words: 2440

Google docs pages: 4

Warnings: self doubt, drinking, that’s about it?

Opening: You’re doubting your skills as a pirate, making you distance yourself from anything that reminds you of the life given to you. Izzy notices this, and tries to change your mind.

AN// Reader can be any gender. Thank you so much for this request! A good ol’ angst with comfort at the end !! I’ll probably take a small break from ofmd after this because the urge to write a couple of genshin fics is high because I can’t find anything else but smut for that fandom. And while I can certainly live with that, I must add some angst into the mix (as I usually do :”D) Requests are only open for genshin for a bit !^^

“Skilled enough to keep running…”

Being a pirate wasn’t just a title given to some that automatically turned you into the stereotypical barbarian. While it did sometimes awfully seem like some were born to a life such as this, you felt more like a scared mouse at times. That was an underestimate, not even at times. Most of the time. Sailing, cleaning the decks, cooking, sharpening swords and all the other small tasks you usually took were easy. But whenever a more serious situation came about, you froze. You were useless.

What kind of a pirate doesn’t know how to hold a gun properly without having your hands shake like you were going through an internal earthquake? Or one that didn’t know how to have a proper grip of their sword, so that the opponent could just smack it out of your hands? All of that and more was the norm for you. And no one even dared to tell you how useless you were.

You would have left this life a long time ago if you could have. But where would have you even gone? You had no home, other than the sea. And you couldn’t be at the sea without a ship. And a captain you could never be, you barely survived as a crew member. At times it felt like the others just pitied you, making them not want to tell you that they saw the way you struggled to even handle a sword. And it wasn’t like you hadn’t asked for lessons for both guns and swords. But even those hadn’t helped. Something in you told you to keep running whenever something bad was about to unfold.

So you scurried away like a mouse whenever you felt useless or when the rest of the crew handled a battle perfectly fine without you fiddling with a sword in their way. Without even noticing you started doing this even when there was no need for it.

The evenings usually spent with the crew; talking, drinking, and laughing turned into you sitting at the bow of the ship alone. Watching as the waves hit the ship and as the droplets joined back into the huge body of water. The nights usually spent with Izzy, arguing over who would eventually take the look out shift, when both of you knew you’d sit in the crowsnest together the whole night turned into you hiding away until he gave up looking for you before making your way to the mast. At least you were in no one's way.

And oddly enough, most of the changes didn’t bother you. After all, it felt like this was how things were meant to be. But those look out shifts became something you soon started to miss. Especially when you had to wait for him to stop looking for you before going to the mast. You could hear him search for you, even if he was never loud with it. You knew the first mate would never admit to willingly spending those hours with you. So it hurt to ignore him like this.

But as time went on, the man became more persistent, a trait you admired. Of course he had noticed that your absence wasn’t simply exhaustion from the small tasks you always insisted on doing, saying that it was the least you could offer. Which he never understood, because in his eyes you had potential. Like raw marble that hadn’t been shaped into a statue yet. But every time he had tried to teach you, you had shied away.

So he took it upon himself to catch you and ask what was going on. Not only for his own sake, but the captains had been asking about you and what kind of a first mate would have he been if he didn’t know where the crew was. Especially when one of them had seemingly disappeared, apart from the cleaning still being magically done. Knowing it was you.

So another night, he looked for you as had become a habit. And as per usual tradition, you were nowhere to be found. No amount of lantern light on the murky deck would have given out where you could have been, and searching the whole ship at such an hour would have been a waste of time. But this time you made a mistake.

While trying to shift positions in the comfort of a deep shadow, you slipped onto the wet deck. Not badly, but enough to make a noise. If it hadn’t been for the lantern in the first mate’s hand, you wouldn’t have been able to tell that he was coming towards you. His clothes blended so well into the night. But so did yours, something you thought was boring. Though, it gave an advantage and allowed you to slip away for a moment, still aware that the first mate wasn’t stupid. He’d sniff out your tracks like a bloodhound in no time. Especially with where you were now.

Stede’s quarters, the lights now dim and the soft snoring of the other captain audible every now and then. Izzy wouldn’t have to do more than peek through the small window to see you here. The dim lights even cast a shadow on the wooden flooring, determining your presence.

Your heart was pounding, just like it always did when you fled from a fight. And you did so now even when you knew the person after you was someone you should have had respect for. Pouting, you realised you should have never stepped a foot on a ship. Who by accident disrespects the privacy of their captain and the commands of a first mate?

Biting your bottom lip to keep the thoughts at bay and the tears far away, you pushed a closet door open, slid between the soft fabrics and closed the door the best you could. You crouched down, sitting alone in the closet like a scared child. A fast breath escaped, determined not to call it a sob. That would have been the last straw for you, if you cried now they might as well have you thrown overboard tomorrow morning.

But even if the tears never came, the sob was heard. The door opened, but no one stepped in. He was smart enough not to barge in, unlike you. After what sounded like he had determined safe entry, the first mate finally stepped in. He called you silently by name, knowing the outcome but still tried. To his usual style, a few curses left him as Stede’s breathing pattern changed momentarily. Soon the dim light of the lantern shone right towards the closet, a straight line of light making its way right beside you through a crack. You didn’t feel like trying to run anymore. “Fucking, get out of there.” A snappy whisper came from the other side of the door, making you hug your knees. What a stew you’d brewed for yourself.

A groan rumbled from Izzy’s throat as he slowly opened the closet door, shining the light in only to find the person he’d been looking for at the bottom of it. He wanted to be mad, to tell you that he wasn’t a nanny and you weren’t a child. But the sight of you made him hold back slightly, offering you a hand. “Get up.” He said silently, you staring up at him before taking his hand.

He led you out on the main deck, making sure to close the cabin door silently not to wake up Stede. He stayed silent until he’d brought you to the railing to which he leaned on, as a deep sigh left him. He brushed back his hair, leaning back ever so slightly as he turned to look at you. You held yourself, gaze avoiding his, not sure if he was mad at you.

He’d always been better at you at the whole pirate thing, not that you’d known him for more than a year at maximum. But for some reason he chose to spend time with you. Which you’d never understood. Wouldn’t have it been more entertaining for him to talk to someone who understood him? “You know, I’ve fucking hated being here too.” He started, breaking the silence with a comment he was hoping to land somewhere near the reason why you’d been avoiding him. And the attempt somewhat worked, gaining your attention as your eyes finally moved to his form. “After Stede came along, and his…crew” He left the terms ‘fucking useless’ out for now, adding them in only in his inner monologue. You took a step closer, leaning on the railing, copying his mannerisms. “But you’re not useless.” You sighed, turning to look at the water, not wanting to see how he looked at you after. “I was to Edward for some time.” He replied, turning to one of the wooden containers on deck, rummaging through it, knowing there were a few bottles at the bottom of it. And he was right, of course. “You don’t need someone to be useful. I can’t even be useful to myself.” You shrugged, feeling somewhat better now that you were talking to him again, though still tense. “What use is an unused first mate?” He asked, giving you a look as he seemed to notice you weren’t picking up on what he meant, now that he’d finally caught up with the problem. It had been the fact that you kept fleeing after every minor failure. The first mate opened the bottle, the cap of it falling somewhere on the deck, the sound of it slowly rolling away as the ship swayed audible for a moment.

You turned to look at him once more. “But you’re still skilled. Surely there is someone who’s in need of someone like you.” Izzy sighed, wanting to groan out of slight frustration because he wasn’t used to comforting people, but he kept that to himself. And he told himself that it was simply because you intrigued him, still a part of him knowing it was because he actually cared. But that was an emotion yet unknown to him. “At some point in sailing with the same crew, they become too close to leave behind. No matter how they treat you.” ‘That's family for you’, you thought to yourself, not having many other family dynamics to compare this to. But then again, he was correct. And something in you had known that this whole time. That’s why you hadn’t left the crew, but instead turned to hiding away. Because the crew had formed into a family.

You fell into a silence, a comfortable one. Izzy followed along, offering you the rum bottle to drink from, not knowing many other ways to ease the feelings he knew all too well. He hadn’t been born with a sword in hand either, and he had the scars on his back as a reminder of who he had had to become in order to survive and live the life he’d been given. But if he could offer you an easier way to ease into this life, he could try. Wouldn’t have been the first time for him to find someone who just needed a little sharpening.

You took a swig, placing the bottle on the railing, still holding the neck of it. You saw the crew in a better light now. Being able to kill someone wasn’t something that gained you respect and made you useful, that was only a skill most here knew only to survive and protect the family they’d found. The more you thought back to what you usually did for others, they always seemed to be thankful. It was the small tasks, the ones that no one else bothered to do that made the crew respect you as one of their own. But one thing was still unclear. Why did Izzy care?

You handed the bottle to him, tilting your head. “Why do you care? Care enough to come look for me now..?” You asked, confused. Sure, you’d spent time with him and he was by far the only person from the crew you knew this well, but by the way he acted towards others you would have never guessed he would have been the person to come looking for you so persistently. The first mate took the opportunity to shut himself up before anything slipped past him by taking a long swig from the bottle. Though, eventually having to put it down. He cleared his throat, extending his time to think of an answer even he didn’t know. The air was tense now that he’d used all his getaway cards.

A breath of the cool night air and he spoke. “Because I feel something for you”, shattering the silence from earlier. You stared at him, watching him take another swig, all words gone from your mind. Your mouth hung agape, wanting to tell him you felt the same but none of that came out. He’d helped you enough for tonight, you didn’t want to watch the poor man suffer any further.

You took a hold of his hand, the one grasping the bottle oddly tight. Your touch eased the hold, making him turn to you. “And if you still want, I can-” He attempted to escape, but you knew by now how that always ended up. No one could run for forever, no matter how skilled they were. You gently took a step closer, awkward but still somehow leading. He wasn’t resisting, so you got closer. Still no words in mind, you thought this would have told him more than any of your stuttered words could. You kissed him, awkwardly, but it was the meaning behind it that mattered. It didn’t last long, not as long as similar actions in the future did. Yet he would continue to look at you with the same expression he had on his face now. One of melancholic surprise, like he was sad yet still caring. Confused. You both had something to work on, together.

AN// Shoutout to clocks and time fr, it’s 5am again :”D Anyway I’ve healed from a fever and what I think was a sinus infection or still is??? Not sure man but I’m still holding on, trust. We'll see whatever ache attacks me next :"DD If this was proof read funny, I apologise. I'm tired xd

#Izzy Hands #izzy hands x reader #israel hands #ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd x reader #our flag means death x reader #x reader #fanfic #izzy hands beloved #yar har i love pirates

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