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starillusion13 · 8 months

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Keep it a secret (Teaser)

Pairing: stepbrothers! Jeno and Jaemin x f!reader

W.C: main plot is 13k(around)

Genre: SMUT, YANDERE, STEP-CAST

Warnings: The main plot will have all the necessary warnings. Teaser has some possessive behavior, restraining hint, manhandling(?). You can expect the main plot with Yandere details and smut warnings(obvio).

Network: @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated 😭. Applause to the ones who come up to me to interact and they know how friendly I am. Okay enough!

MINORS LETS BE INNOCENT AND NOT INTERACT!Okay?🔞

*under the cue*

“Where do you think you are going?”

Only one more step and you would have been out of the house but not today. Gulping, you clutched the door handle tightly in your fist and turned around to face the owner of the voice. It’s not like the person is anyhow unfamiliar to you or someone you are scared of. Well, yeah the person who you want to avoid rather you should unless you want to be in a big trouble. Turning around on your heel, you kept your gaze on the floor, suddenly finding it the most beautiful and appreciable thing in your life. You could feel the approaching footsteps but not daring to look up because why will you when you are damn aware of the person before you. Your panic state didn’t go unnoticed by the approaching person. Now, you could smell the cologne of the man and the close proximity between you two was making your mind scream loudly inside. Two fingers brushing your cheeks sliding down to your chin and grabbed it, forcing you to look up. Due to the sudden impact, you closed your eyes, still could hear the chuckle left from his lips. Even when your eyes are closed, you could still feel the well built muscular body towering over you. Another hand brushed your hairs and tugged them behind your eyes. Your heart racing and mind screaming but you just wanted to run away from the current situation.

“Open your eyes baby.”

No. Please let me go out. You were mentally begging him to let you go but nothing was coming out of your throat and so you just gulped the lump. Not reacting to his words, he gripped your jaw tightly and you could feel his breath fanning over your lips. You tried to bend backwards but his other hand placed on your lower back pulled you closer towards him.

“Didn’t you hear what I said? Open your eyes. Let me see the pretty eyes of my baby.”

His voice was a lot more dominative than before and you didn’t want to make him mad so you slowly parted your eyelids. Eyes couldn’t focus on his face due to the fact that you were closing them so tightly previously and also this man being so close to you that lights couldn’t make up the image properly for your eyes. Flattering your eyelashes , you were then staring to those attractively seductive eyes as it could hipnotiza you. Anyone could have felt weak for these eyes and him in such situation including you but not when he being your brother. Well, correctly stepbrother. You were damn aware of the treatment that a step brother should have for his little sister but in your case, nothing was near to that fact check. You were literally living with two damn tease who constantly stir up every situation to flirting and teasing.

“Did you ask us before leaving?”

“I- I was just going to tell you.”

“Really? It doesn’t look like that. It was as if you were going somewhere else to avoid us tonight. Is there any reason?”

You were trying to voice out some words but the way his fingers were brushing over your lower lips. Oh gosh! It’s not helping your condition.

“Answer him.”

Okay! Time to leave now. The only thing I have to do is to push the man in front of me and quickly run out of the door before the other one can descend the stairs. Eyes dancing on their forms, mentally you counted to three and you pushed him. He got startled due to your sudden action but was quick to catch your hands.

“Step one more. You will regret it later so much.”

“Someone is being a stubborn today, you know.”

“Where was she going Jaemin?”

You could see him smirking on his brother’s question before replying to him, he winked at you with lips sending a flying kiss to you. The biggest tease in the household. You glared at him and when you looked at the other one, he was already glaring at you darkly with clenched jaw. But you were getting distracted how his biceps were well reflected under the bright lights because of his black sleeveless tee.

“I was asking her that before you made your entry on our private time. Jeno got no jam.”

“Shut up Jaemin. You are literally standing at the entrance in a massive hall and saying private time.”

“But there is no one around.”

“I am here. Well, getting back to her. It’s past curfew time and where is she going even all dolled up.”

Both of them expecting an answer from you, waiting for your reply but you chose to remain quiet. You tried to wiggle your hand out of his grip but he held it tighter and Jeno was satisfied with his brother’s act. You stared at the older one who had already seated himself comfortably on the sofa and staring back at you both, gesturing his brother to pull you towards him.

“I was just going somehwere.”

“Where?” Jeno asked with a lot more husky voice.

“T-to to meet someone.”

“Now?” Jaemin with a frown on his face turned towards you.

“Yeah….”

“Who?”

You looked towards Jeno before thinking twice as it would be safe to tell them or not but you chose death.

“My boyfriend.”

“Since when do you have one?”

“We are just going to meet today to get along with each other so he invited me to his house for a sleepover. He is my old friend.”

“And you thought without telling us, it would be fine for you to just sneak out of the house and have fun.”

“No Jeno look I-“

You didn’t notice when Jaemin went behind and wrapped his arms around you to hold you flushed to him. His nose snuggling into your wavy locks on your shoulder and neck.

Whispering ‘baby’ ‘pretty’ ‘princess’ in your ears, breathe tingling over. But the next thing he whispered made your eyes went wide.

“Tell him you can’t make it today.”

Jeno read your actions precisely and noticing how you pressed your legs together, his brother’s every little action was getting a reaction out from you. Honestly, he was enjoying the view more than he could describe but the moment your eyes went wide, the corner of his lips rose on knowing what was the possible reason behind that. Moreover, he found everything cute.

“Do it. What ever he is telling you, work it.”

“No no I can’t.” Jaemin’s grip was strong and the way both of them hit the Gym, you were well aware that you couldn’t stand any chance in front of them.

“You can do this but you can’t go out.”

“Please.”

“Call him yourself or I’m going to do it. What do you want?”

Snatching your purse from the hand, he hurriedly rummage into it to find your phone. Found it, unlocking the phone, he went through all your contacts and text messages until he found out your precious friend. How come he knows my password?

Dialing the number, he kept the phone in front of you with speaker on. You could see your reflection with your stepbrother on that tiny screen. Suddenly the screen turned on, and someone spoke from the other side.

“Hello?”

“Hey! Jongho….”

Even when you were talking with your friend, you made a straight eye contact with those daring eyes of jeno in front of you holding your phone. Jaemin was still in his world, inhaling your body scent as if you were a drug he was missing out all these days. Your voice cracked when you felt him leaving kisses over your exposed shoulder.

“When are you coming Y/N?”

Before you could reply, jeno mouthed you to say what they wanted to hear from you. He raised his eyebrows when you remained quiet.

“Sorry but I don’t think ......I can go today.”

“What happened? Is everything alright? Do I need to come over for help?”

“No no it’s just mild headache. You don’t have to worry much.”

Jeno came closer to you and tracing his fingers through your face before pressing them on your lips. You averted your eyes away.

Jaemin whispered in between biting your earlobe, “eyes on him baby.”

You somehow managed to do so until the third voice interrupted.

“Please take care and let me know if you need something.”

You replied with a low ‘hmm’ before he cut the line and tossing the phone on the sofa.

“Now leave me. Let me go.”

“Now where are you planning to go? Didn’t Jeno said earlier it’s already past curfew time?”

“Both of you have already ruined my night. Now Atleast let me go to my room. So move!”

Both of them chuckled on your reply and you creased your eyebrows in confusion, wiggling under their hold and gaze. Finding your actions cute, they started laughing.

“Why are you laughing?”

“You said you can’t make it tonight so let us make that excuse valid. Right Jaemin?”

“Of course, Jeno.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can do this all night baby, Make a wish.” Jaemin licked and whispered in your ears, biting the earlobe before retreating his mouth.

Jeno leaned down to match your eye level.

“Let’s keep it a secret before you can unfold what’s coming in your way.”

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

OUT NOW

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Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @vvshere @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @eriny123 @jaehunnyy

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longsleeveleper · 10 months

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Can’t put into words what finding Nurgle meant to me

Not long after Halloween I got chronically sick and was confined to my room with naught but my computer to keep me company. During that time I fell into Warhammer 40k via a let’s play of Dark Crusade and as a Warcraft 3 kid oh man love at first sight. I’d fall in love with fantasy later but that’s another story.

The funny thing is chaos isn’t my favorite faction, though it is one of them. My favorite faction is Orks. And the Death Guard aren’t my favorite chaos warband, it’s the Night Lords (yes yes edgelord I’m aware it’s what I’m here for). So I don’t really identify with Nurgle on a tribal level, I don’t love him because my favorite character or faction is Nurgle. I identify with Nurgle on a philosophical level, because of the value they had to me metaphysically.

Now let me clarify, I don’t want everyone to die of super-mega-pneumonia. Quite the opposite I want nobody to ever be sick because I now know for an absolute fact being sick SUCKS. But, I am sick, and I have been told I will be sick forever. This is where the value of Nurgle to me enters the picture.

Nurgle and Nurglite worshippers are the first time I can recall truly see people with diseases being represented with strength. It definitely want the first time such a thing was presented to me, but Nurgle is such a strong and repeated example of it that it I couldn’t ignore it. Because illness is strength for those who worship Nurglites. They are some of the most stubborn damn near impossible to kill just straight up fuck you try me durable. In mechanical terms being a nurglite will make you tougher to kill. Because they are sick, because being sick is a gift from their god to make them stronger. WOW!

There are so many further layers to my love of Nurgle. For one, Nurglites are described as being able to feel no pain. Now pain has an important biological function, but let me tell you, I have way too damn much of it. I haven’t been without pain for 13 years, I haven’t fully relaxed in 13 years, I haven’t been able to think without a dagger in my head in 13 fucking years. So the notion of feel no pain has quite the appeal to me, even if on a rational level I understand that feeling no pain would be it’s own dire problem.

There’s also how the Death Guard fall to Nurgle, where so much pain and suffering is inflicted on them to the point they begged on someone anyone to take the pain away. And yeah Nurgle is the guy who made them feel away, he is evil remember. But hey I’ve been there! I have begged and pleaded and prayed to doctors to please do something anything to make the pain stop, to make me feel better. And you know what? At least the death guard got a fucking answer. I’m still in pain! No one’s answered my prayers. So I understand the utter desperation of a situation like that.

But speaking of what Nurgle does let’s talk about him! Grandfather Nurgle, that’s his title, because that’s his demeanor. He’s a doting fatherly god who loves and cares for his worshippers, giving onto them lovely gifts. Sure, those gifts are horrific diseases. But he’s one of the few deities to show anything close to benevolence in the entire setting of 40k. A lot of his followers follow suit as well. Whether it be the jovial Great Unclean Ones, the feral shitkid nurglings, the Beasts of Nurgle who are literally described as puppylike, or an amicable friendly cultists who smiles at you through rotting teeth a lot of Nurgle’s followers are *happy*. The notion of finding happiness even in a setting as terribly horribly bleak as 40k inspires me to hope I can find happiness in our much happier reality.

There are many, many things I love and adore. So many things that have meant the world to me, that have taught me something that isn’t irreplaceable. But when I chose to get a tattoo I picked the Mark of Nurgle. Because to me, that symbol means love, but it’s also something that will never ever not be a part of me. It means acceptance of where I am and who I am. It’s an attempt to salvage what strength I can from a situation that has rendered me weak. So whenever I need to remind myself of that meaning I touch my tattoo, and I try to embody what Nurgle means to me. My illness isn’t something I can beat. But it’s something I can endure.

#nurgle #warhammer fantasy #warhammer 40k #chronically ill #chronic pain #sickness #illness tw #physical illness #disease

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icey--stars · 7 months

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Golden Fire

Part three of the "i want to break these bones 'till they're better" series where literally, it's just smut. Except- oh no, there are emotions, whatever shall they do?

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

Day 7 of @erisweek2023 (Free Day)

a/n: at last, the cliffhangers are over lmao. DIRECT CONTINUATION OF PT. 2

WARNINGS: THIS IS ALL NSFW! MINORS DNI, 18+

{ ao3 } "i want to break these bones 'till they're better" series: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

And quite literally too. Eris was about to be fucked.

Azriel forced Eris to his feet and and turned Eris toward the desk again, swiftly moving the ink, quill and letter he was writing far away so they wouldn’t disturb it. Then he forced Eris to lean down over it, pulling his hands behind his back in a move that completely immobilized Eris and seemed much too easy for Azriel.

“You sick fuck,” Eris growled. “What is with you and restraining me?”

“You are incapable of staying still on your own,” Azriel answered with a bored tone that annoyed Eris to no end. “And I have a feeling if I don’t, you’re going to find some excuse to burn my face off.”

“I will burn your face off regardless.”

“Wonderful,” Azriel muttered and then forced Eris’s pants down to his ankles and pushed his hands into the small of his back harshly as the male went down to his knees behind him.

Eris couldn’t lie that he wasn’t turned on from how Azreil seemed to have complete control over him. “If you don’t fucking touch me soon, I’m going to-”

He was caught off guard when Azriel suddenly licked a stripe up from his taint to his hole. “Fuck,” he swore, shutting his eyes tightly.

Azriel chuckled behind him. “You’re so easy,” he purred.

“I am not, you sick fuck-”

Azriel cut him off uncaringly, “Do you have lube in here?”

Eris rolled his eyes. “I am going to kill you,” Eris growled as he shook one of his hands free from Azriel’s hold to open the drawer on his right. He reached into it, past the ink and toward the back where he had a container of oil stored. He pulled it out and set it on the table.

“Oh, but who would make you feel good?” Azriel teased. “I doubt anyone has ever made you feel as good as I can.”

The competitive, overconfident fuck just happened to be right. The previous two times they’d fucked (once in that inn and once before the Blood Duel) it might’ve been quick, but sadly, he couldn’t deny it was some of the best sex he’d ever had.

“Just fuck me you asshole,” Eris growled impatiently.

“Uh uh.” Azriel tutted disapprovingly. “Did you already forget? You’re going to tell me the truth you keep trying to hide.”

Eris blanched. How had he forgotten so easily? Even he didn’t know the answer, however. (He did, he just had it buried deep inside.)

“You forget I’m well versed in surviving torture,” Eris growled and instantly regretted it.

Azriel paused and pulled away. “Who tortured you, Eris?”

Eris rolled his eyes and instead wiggled his hips against the edge of the desk. “You’re more stupid than I originally thought,” Eris said.

“Beron?” Azriel guessed.

Eris remained silent, not wanting to bring up those memories during a moment like this. “Yes,” he muttered quietly. “Now get back to what you were doing. I’ve thought about my late father too much already as of recently.”

Azriel seemed to huff before he resumed exploring the skin around Eris’s hole. He pulled away only for a split moment to say “I’m glad that bastard is dead.” Then he dove back in with more vigor than when he began.

Eris gasped into the wood of his desk, groaning when Azriel pushed past his rim with that addicting tongue of his. Who knew the shadowsinger would be so good at eating ass?

He felt his hands being released, and settled his palms down on the desk, unable to even think about moving away from the pleasure he was being given.

“Stop fucking teasing,” Eris managed to get out, his eyes shut tight against the sensation.

Azriel pulled away for a moment. “Beg,” the shadowsinger demanded.

Eris is about ready to snarl and turn around but Azriel puts a gentle, scarred hand on his lower back. “Or, you can tell me the truth.”

“I am a High-“

“And I have you bent over a desk,” Azriel cut him off. “Beg, or tell me.”

“I fucking hate you,” Eris growled.

After a moment to breathe and convince himself to not break to tell that damn truth but still not lose his mind over how hot this is, he began. “Please,” he gritted out.

“You can do better than that, High Lord,” Azriel said. He trailed that hand up his spine, leaving only brushing, gentle touches as if Eris was a lover. (but he wasn’t and he had to get that through his stupid head.)

“Please stop teasing me and stick your damned fingers in my ass,” Eris said impatiently. “Or I will throw you out of this office.”

“That’s a threat, not begging.”

“I am going to make good on that threat if you don’t-“

Azriel suddenly slapped his ass hard and Eris reeled, gasping loudly. “Motherfucker,” he swore under his breath.

“Try again, Eris. I know you have it in you.”

“Please touch me,” Eris said, wiggling his ass backwards.

“It seems that you have something to practice, Eris. I will take nothing less than begging in return for my touch. But I’ll be merciful this time.”

Eris rolled his eyes and heard Azriel snap the bottle of oil open.

Then he felt the lubed fingers around his ass and grit his teeth to stop himself from moaning at the touch.

“Say please,” Azriel ordered.

Begrudgingly, Eris replied with a “Please.”

“Good boy,” Azriel praised and slid a finger in at last. Eris gasped into the wood of his desk, feeling Azriel thrust that finger inside and curl it slightly. Not too long after, Azriel added a second finger.

“Look at you, bent over the desk for the Night Court’s spymaster. What would people think?” Azriel said haughtily.

Eris tries to snarl something right back at him, but he cuts himself off with a loud moan and Azriel directly massages his prostate to pleasure him into submission. Sadly, it worked quite well.

Eris clenched his hands into fists as Azriel continued, moaning even against clenched teeth to try and keep it contained.

Azriel reached up with his open hand and squeezed Eris’s cheeks, forcing his teeth apart. “Come on, let me hear those pretty noises.”

Eris has half a mind to bite him, but holds back. Apparently, the praise from before and chance for more had him more obedient than usual.

Azriel adds a third finger and begins to relentlessly thrust against his prostate, however, and cuts off all his thoughts. Eris moans loudly, trying to breathe but so utterly and perfectly overwhelmed that he just can’t.

He feels himself getting close to finishing and selfishly decides to not gasp out a warning to Az.

However, his body must have more tells than he thought because the male stops right at the cusp of his orgasm. Eris groans in frustration and anger.

“Aw, was the poor baby close?” Azriel teased. “Poor you. If you’d just tell me the truth, I may have let you come then, but you’re being stubborn so you don’t get to come. At all.”

“I hate you so fucking much,” Eris growled into the desk.

“You’ve established that,” Azriel said, likely smirking wide. “This is your opportunity to tell me the truth, Eris. Don’t make me turn you into a brainless, pleasure-searching fool for it.”

Eris remained stubbornly silent.

“Your choice,” Azriel said.

Then the other male’s cock entered him suddenly and Eris was left gasping in shock and moaning in pleasure from the pain and feeling together.

“If you need to stop, say some place from the Night Court,” Azriel said as he leaned over Eris to plant his hands on the other side of the male’s shoulders, whispering into his pointed ear. “I don’t particularly care which.”

Eris moaned as Azriel immediately set to work. The feeling felt even more intense than the last two times. Azriel’s cock, apparently, was utterly perfect for nailing his prostate every time. Or perhaps it was Azriel’s skill in the bedroom. Eris didn’t particularly care when it felt like this.

Azriel suddenly reached up and grasped tightly onto a fistful of Eris’s hair, causing him to gasp loudly. It was just so much. Azriel was relentless and the pain mixed with his pleasure worked to make a heavy cocktail of sensation. “Shit,” Azriel grunted as Eris suddenly tightened around him as he pulled his hair sharply once again.

Cauldron, Eris was falling apart. He felt so good. It was a perfect way to forget all about the day’s worries, even if it was him getting speared by his enemy’s cock. Or was Azriel really even his enemy anymore? At this point, Eris wasn’t sure. He was just silently hoping not to lose this hate-fucking relationship so soon. (He refused to admit to anything, even to himself, because of that risk.)

Just as Eris began to build toward his orgasm again, right as he was beginning to feel that heat sliding down his spine– Azriel stopped. Stopped fucking him. Stopped pulling his hair and the only place he was touching him was the heavy cock still inside of him.

Eris let out an involuntary whine. “Aww… are you feeling overwhelmed?” Azriel taunted, laving both of his hands over Eris’s ass before smacking it again. Eris jerked forward, eyes still screwed shut.

“If you just told me the truth over why you were so goddamn snarly over me, I would’ve let you come,” Azriel pointed out. He rubbed his hands over the stinging flesh of his ass again. “Just one truth, Eris. You can do it.”

“Never,” Eris gritted out.

“Oh, how you will pay for that stubbornness, Eris.” Azriel sighed. “I can go all night like this, Eris, but I doubt you can.”

Eris didn’t reply, but he also knew that Azriel wasn’t lying about giving him blue balls for the rest of the night.

When Eris remained silent, Azriel sighed and began again.

By the fourth time Azriel had edged him, he was beginning to feel his mind slip away from him. Whines, moans and whimpers escaped his jaws, but not once did he think about telling Azriel to stop.

“Come on, Eris,” Azriel cooed into Eris’s pointed ear. His warm, soft breath made Eris shiver slightly. “Tell me the truth and you can come.”

Eris whined again, drool slipping from between his lips. He opened his mouth to answer, desperate beyond anything. “Because-” He choked as Azriel licked up his ear.

“Yes?” Azriel purred.

“Because I care about you,” Eris whimpered out. He was so overwhelmed.

Azriel paused for a moment and suddenly, dread filled Eris that Azriel was about to leave. But then, he started to thrust gently again and Eris gasped loudly for breath. The movement felt almost gentle, but Eris was in no state to say anything about that.

“Good boy,” Azriel cooed. “Now that that’s over with, I can finally let you come.”

Eris moaned as Azriel thrust slightly harder. His eyes went flying open when Azriel yanked him up to his feet above the desk, leaning back against the shadowsinger. “Look at you,” Azriel purred, “So perfect and compliant for once. All those pretty noises escaping you. You should’ve just told me the truth, baby. I could’ve been treating you the way you deserve from the beginning.”

Eris didn’t know what the hell that meant, but he was in no state to question it as Azriel took the opportunity of Eris being so much closer to start nipping and sucking on Eris’s neck. And holy fuck. Eris knew he was going to have some nice bruises there tomorrow. He was going to be extremely sore regardless.

Eris felt his orgasm creeping toward him as all his muscles tightened in anticipation. Azriel only increased his speed and Eris felt like he was about to shatter and explode at the same time.

“You’re mine,” Azriel snarled possessively. “Say it.”

Eris didn’t have time to question the implications of that as he felt golden fire burn in his chest, yanking impossibly hard before settling as a string of golden fire connecting him to the male behind him. It felt so much different than the fire from before that had almost burned him alive. This fire felt like it was an integral part of him, like he couldn’t exist without it. Not death fire, not the fire he wielded, but golden fire as if it healed. It was beautiful. It felt… like it was important. Like Azriel was important. Like he was Azriel’s and Azriel was his.

“I’m yours,” Eris managed to get out.

It hit him suddenly, so suddenly that Eris didn’t feel his orgasm until the pleasure ripped through him. He screamed his way through his climax, feeling his come spurting from his dick onto his stomach and probably onto his desk too. It felt so good. Azriel continued to thrust, only prolonging the overwhelming pleasure. He felt heat suddenly explode from inside of him and gasped in elation at the feeling.

It seemingly took an eternity to come down from that climax. He was panting loudly, trying to catch his breath and calm down. Distantly, he felt someone almost lovingly rubbing him over his shoulders, back and chest to ground him.

“That’s a good boy,” Someone whispered into his ear. “So good for me.”

Eris whined incoherently in response.

He whimpered as he felt the cock inside of him slide free. He felt so empty.

“Shh…” Someone cooed comfortingly. “I’ve got you.” That someone scooped him off the ground with ease by the backs of his knees and back, carrying him somewhere. It felt nice. Like he was being cared for, for once. His mother tried all the time, but it was always Eris in the end.

He heard running water and perked up out of his daze, slowly opening his eyes. Azriel was holding him. Azriel was taking care of him. “Where…?” Eris questioned through a broken voice. “What…?”

Azriel turned to look down at him. “There you are,” the shadowsinger said. “I thought I fucked you silly.”

Eris let out a slow breath, closing his eyes again briefly. “What happened?” Why was he doing this? He thought silently, was what he really wanted to ask.

“I’ll explain after you bathe,” Azriel said. “You came pretty hard.”

“I feel like I just ran from the Spring Court all the way to the Night Court in a day,” Eris admitted, groaning. “Put me down.”

Azrel set him down on the table near the running bath water. Then he stood back, hands on his hips as if he was surveying Eris, making sure he was alright.

Eris finally recognized the space causing him to be slightly worried over how long it took him to recognize his own bathroom. His ass was sore and he for certain that he wasn’t going to be able to walk tomorrow.

“Sore?” Azriel questioned after a wince. Eris wasn’t sure why the shadowsinger was even here. This hate-fucking relationship definitely didn’t include caring aftercare. (Loving, some might even say.)

“Why?” Eris asked suddenly.

Azriel grimaced a little. “It seems we have a mutual care for each other, and good thing for that or I’d have to keep the mating bond a secret.”

Eris is suddenly reminded of that feeling right before his climax: the golden fire that formed a string connecting him to Azriel. That was the mating bond? How did he not realize what it was?

“Mating bond?” Eris choked out. “That’s what it was?”

Azriel seemed to hesitate to answer. “How about we talk after you’re all clean?” He suggested.

“You promise?” Eris asked, glaring up at the male.

“I promise,” Azriel assured him. “Now, are you sore and want the massage I’m about to offer you to help, or do I drop you in the tub to deal with yourself?”

Eris’s lips tightened as he hesitated to choose the option he most definitely did want. But, luckily for him, the need won out eventually. “Okay,” he whispered.

“Okay, as in massage?” Azriel checked.

Eris nodded. Azriel gave him an almost gentle smile and Eris felt enraptured by it. The shadowsinger smiling so genuinely like this, he learned over the years, was extremely rare. It was always mocking smiles and confident smirks.

“I’m going to pick you up again,” Azriel warned, leaning down over Eris. With no protest from either of them, Azriel picked up carefully and moved to set him down in the tub of warm water. Azriel was very strong, Eris observed.

He had to admit the water was the perfect temperature, though. He hummed in contentment, leaning back against the bath wall for a few seconds.

“Do you want that massage now or later?” Azriel asked. Eris opened an eye to look at the shadowsinger. He almost looked nervous.

Eris sighed and then scooted forward and then looked pointedly at Azriel, inviting him wordlessly. Azriel seemed to sigh out some of his anxious energy as he climbed in behind Eris in the bath. Eris scooted a bit more as he spotted Azriel’s wings being held awkwardly.

Azriel seemed content as Eris leaned back against him, wrapping his arms under Eris’s to hold him close. Surprisingly, (or maybe not so surprisingly…) he felt so safe and comfortable like this, laying against his old enemy’s chest in a warm bath. (Enemy no longer. Azriel was his mate.)

“Good?” Azriel rumbled from behind him. Eris murmured incoherently in response, but the meaning was positive. Azriel seemed to smile behind him and then pointed to the soaps lined up on the edge of the bath. “Which ones do you use?” Azriel asked.

Eris sighed and then reached forward to grab the washcloth and then his cinnamon scented body wash.

Azriel was swift in grabbing both those items. “Let me,” he ordered gently.

Eris was much too tired to protest and simply watched as Azriel lathered the washcloth in the body wash and then began to gently swipe it over Eris’s chest, shoulders and back. Eris took to taking care of legs with Azriel mumbling that he sadly couldn’t reach those limps. Eris had chuckled a little at that.

“Hair?” Azriel questioned, placing the body wash back and washcloth after rinsing it.

Eris’s eyelids were close to falling shut as he reached forward for the shampoo, not letting Azriel take it this time and instead squeezing a good amount into the shadowsinger’s palm and scooting forward only to lean back and wet his hair in the water.

Azriel began to massage the shampoo into Eris’s scalp. Eris let out a groan at the feeling. It felt like pleasure, but was different. It just felt good to have someone else massaging his scalp and running their hands gently through his hair. It felt like eternity.

“Rinse,” Azriel rumbled softly. Eris promptly dunked his hair under the water and Azriel’s hands continued to run through the auburn locks, drawing out every bit of shampoo before gently supporting Eris’s head and pushing it back up above the water.

“Conditioner?” Azriel requested, holding out a palm.

Eris reached forward in a daze for his conditioner, giving Azriel a small amount before putting it back and settling back into the comfortable silence of Azriel just… taking care of him. He was much too tired to be questioning that right now. The exhaustion was wearing heavy on his limbs as Azriel helped him rinse once again.

Then Azriel began to rub his thumbs over the back of Eris’s shoulders where he was surprisingly holding a lot of tension. Eris groaned in contentment as the shadowsinger’s hands confidently began going through each knot in his shoulders, neck and back.

“Good?” Azriel questioned.

“Good,” Eris replied tiredly, his eyes closed. He felt like he was going to fall asleep as Azriel continued his movements. He slumped against the side of the bath for support, yawning.

After an uncertain amount of time, Azriel’s hands returned to his shoulders and Azriel leaned forward to press a gentle kiss on Eris’s nape and then the area between his shoulder and neck.

“You want to go to bed?” Azriel asked.

Eris only yawned again.

Azriel huffed a little laugh and then, supporting Eris gently, he climbed out of the tub and then lifted Eris out, setting him on the same table as before as he went in search of towels while also taking the chance to drain the tub.

“Cabinet,” Eris murmured tiredly. “Top left.”

“This one?” Azriel questioned, scarred hand poised on the handle of the correct cabinet. Eris nodded, yawning.

Azriel pulled out two towels and wrapped one around Eris first before quickly, messily drying himself off before assisting Eris.

“Do you want boxers?” Azriel questioned as he walked into Eris’s bedroom.

Eris shook his head. He normally slept in the nude, if even to keep people from waking him up in the morning.

“Alright,” Azriel said and set him on the bed. “I’ll be right back.”

Eris yawned again and nodded, managing to get under the covers, laying his head against a pillow. He was almost asleep when the bed dipped and Azriel climbed in beside him.

“Sorry,” the shadowsinger apologized. “I wanted to make sure to clean up that mess on your desk before morning.”

Eris just yawned.

“Do you want to sleep or for me to explain?” Azriel asked.

Eris sighed, cracking open his eyes to look at the shadowsinger across from him. “Tell me,” he ordered. “But you may have to repeat some details later.”

“Right,” Azriel said as if preparing himself. “What did you feel?”

“Referring to the mating bond you mentioned?” Eris asked tiredly, forcing away his tiredness for just a little bit to pay attention the best he can.

“Yes.”

“Golden fire, tethering me to you.”

Azriel sighed, closing his eyes. He almost looked relieved. “That’s the mating bond,” he explained, opening those hazel eyes again. Eris remembered the firelights in the room and reached for the fires without even half a thought to turn them down to mere embers.

“So, you’re saying we’re mates?” Eris asked. “How odd that the Mother decided upon us.”

Azriel chuckled a little in the low light. “I suppose so.”

“Did you know before?” Eris asked.

“No, it snapped for me then too. I just happen to have brothers who are already mated and have told me what it feels like.”

Eris hummed in acknowledgement. “Well then, what do you do with your mate then, Azriel?”

Azriel seemed to be taken aback by the actual use of his name versus something like “shadowsinger” as usual as he shifted on the bed.

“I’m much too exhausted to stay up much longer, Azriel, so you will either answer or at least stay still so I can fall asleep before I have to deal with the hell of my court in the morning.”

Azriel sighed. “I would kiss my mate and then keep them close for the rest of the night.”

Eris felt a zing go up his spine in anticipation. “Well then, aren’t you going to then?”

Azriel shifted closer, and then even in the low light of the room, managed to press his lips to Eris’s. However, this kiss was different from any of the other’s they’d shared. Rather than battling for dominance, it was sweet. Soft, even. When Azriel pulled away, he wrapped an arm around Eris’s torso and then pulled him closer.

Eris sighed in contentment, resting his head gently against Azriel’s arm and the pillow.

“You like this,” Azriel whispered aloud.

Eris’s lips tugged upwards. “I do, but we are both going to sleep before I die of sleep deprivation.”

Azriel laughed and he felt the movement of his chest against his chin. Azriel tucked him even closer and tangled their legs together before suddenly, there was something dark and warm encircling them both.

Eris popped his eyes open in curiosity and ran his finger along the edge.

Azriel hissed and went to gently grab his hand and settle it back down. “Not right now, High Lord.”

“The rumor about Illyrian wings is true?” Eris asked, grinning.

“Yes,” Azriel muttered. “And just like you, I need my sleep. Not your fingers running over my wings.”

“Would you let me do that?” Eris questioned.

“Only if you’re good,” Azriel rumbled. “Now sleep.”

Eris wanted to ask more cheeky questions, but he settled again, reducing the embers in the firelights down to nothing before closing his eyes and shifting just a little bit closer to Azriel and settling down.

“I will never hurt you again,” Azriel vows into the silence.

And with that, Eris finally fell victim to his exhaustion.

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

TAGLIST HERE! - see post for specifics <3

@bunnymallowo, @officiallyunofficialperson, @margssstuff, @rebloggiest-reblogger, @inpraizeof, @graciereads, @eos-princess, @bubybubsters, @thegirlintheshadows101, @fieldofdaisiies,

(please let me know if you'd rather not be tagged in Eris Week or would like to!!)

#erisweek2023 #eris vanserra #eris acotar #acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar fanfic #pro eris vanserra #azriel #azris #azris fanfiction #azris supremacy #azriel x eris #high lord eris #acotar smut #smut #mywriting

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thegeminisage · 2 months

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ok! it's time for a ds9 update. last night we squeezed in "move along home" and "the nagus."

move along home (ds9):

i am Informed this is a divisive episode but honestly i had fun w it!!

nice 2 see jake always. every time jake is on screen w his dad sisko my best friend sisko get to exude good dad energy. love that.

like. please. he's gonna give jake the talk? at 14??? 14 is too late. he knows everything. also lmao the fact that nog there ferengi where women don't wear clothes told him everything. i'm choosing to ignore my annoyance with ferengis as a whole and find that funny because of sisko's reaction

reasonably funny antics between quark and odo here. i am getting a little tired of odo not getting anything to do besides flirt with quark, but then i have to remind myself that odo had an episode all to himself quite literally six episodes ago, it's just our insane watch order + bad batch and natla coming out that makes it feel longer to me

quark like screaming on his knees begging not to have to put someone to death when nbody was gonna die anyway was actually really funny, but i do like the nuance in his kneejerk reaction when he found out the pieces were people, which was to forsake pride and ask odo to play for him. he could have gotten defensive for the bit, which he did do later, but his first reaction was to be scared which is like completely normal and went a long way towards humanizing him in an otherwise VERY silly episode

my favorite moment of this episode, besides the part where they hotboxed the shap, was when those little balls of light were coming towards them and sisko was like FIND COVER and julian bashir, instead of finding cover, stood directly aainst the wall they were aiming at, ass first. and then died. i want that twink obliterated.png

the nagus (ds9):

thank you to whomstever warned me about this episode

it was not good and it did suck bad. i think this was the first real dud ds9 gave us (i'm not counting the q one cuz that was basically a tng episode in disguise). i feel like it would be sooo easy to walk back some of the really awful elements of the ferengi but instead of doing that we have chosen to crank them up to 11. sexism, antisemitism, etc etc...

my other problem is that. and before anyone gets mad i have a touch of faceblindness. I CANNOT TELL THOSE FERENGI APART. they gave two of the ferengi the same nose and i was totally lost trying to follow the plot.

quark holding the idiot ball. he's dumb in his own way because everyone on that space station is using their last brain cell but he's also very shrewd. so it just felt off. and again odo had nothing to do except flirt with him but that's a me problem

BUGS FOR DINNER. i hated this episode in more ways than one

THAT SAID. we finally got to see o'brien again! and shockingly i really really really really liked the b plot

i did go blind with rage when nog got pulled out of school. yes. but the rest of it.

first of all it's really funny that jake is running around with nog all the time and their families are both going DON'T!!! and sisko is like Oh No My Son Has Discovered Girls when there is every evidence he is even now discovering boys

SECONDLY sisko reminding o'brien that one day his adorable little three year old will be 14 and the light leaving o'brien's eyes

but my favorite part is that jake wasn't being late to curfew because he's a bad kid or falling under a bad influence. he's a GOOD kid doing an AWESOME thing. idk, it was really sweet that like, even when sisko was like "yeah racism's bad but with ferengi it's different" jake was like "is it? :/" and then went right on teaching his buddy how to read. and now he's earned dad's permission to hang out with nog finally. it was a fun little subplot that i didn't realize was going anywhere and then it did. a very pleasant surprise and kept the episode from being a complete drag.

also, dax coming it and daintily sampling sisko's soup or whatever, then deftly getting rid of sisko so she could help herself to a giant heap lmao. queen

anyway, even though that's definitely been the worst ds9 ep so far, it wasn't NEARLY as bad as some of tng's duds. i'm thinking specifically of "code of honor," "violations," etc. like it could have been so much worse. i'm not going to delude myself into thinking we're past all the clunkers just yet, but i was still expecting a solid hour of agony and what i got was not that. not good by any means but not tng. whew!

TONIGHT: "starship mine" and "lessons" from tng. thots and prayers🙏

#personal #star trek blogging #ds9 lb

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01mishchelle · 6 months

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What I’ve learned so far about ‘manifesting’

i find it extremely idiotic how people believe that they have to do this and that to get their desire. believe me, i used to be like that too. 2-3 years ago i joined a shifting community and let me tell ya, everyone overcomplicated the basics. thats when i gave up and left.

a few weeks ago when i was in a negative, heartbroken state and was begging to have my sp back, a manifestation video came up from this user called hyler. i followed her instructions and even sammy ingram’s.

that’s also where i discovered neville goddard for the first time.

i found it quite odd that we had to do affirm all the time, and thats what i did. i still felt weird, unaccomplished. i did get results, the negatives and the positives. i kept on holding on those results as a proof my sp loved me. but deep inside i knew what i was doing was completely wrong. if they tell you to live in the end, why would i affirm 24/7 to have that desire?

+also adding this, i’ve heard about the void state everywhere in pinterest and here and let me tell ya, after the experiences i’ve had in the shifting community, i stayed the (language) fuck away from that. yes sorry for the people who do the void state, yes cool if you do it if it works for you but for me i just hate doing methods.

it didnt make sense for me. i decided to listen to myself and found out more about neville goddard and edward art.

these two gentlemen made me open my eyes for the first time. this is what ive been missing. ive missed the whole point, everyone missed the whole point.

please study edward art’s works and his i am meditation.

anyways, the whole point is that you literally don’t have to lift a finger to have that desire you want. i’ve made some notes for myself when reading edward art:

“If you lived in a world where all things are possible, and you could create anything you want, would you choose to create a situation and then worry about it? No you would not. You only do because you are identifying yourself with your Outer-man! When I start to feel afraid, or worry, or feel pressure that causes me anxiety, I realize that I AM the INNER MAN CREATING that in the WORLD OF IMAGINATION.”

“I want you to stop worrying about HOW or WHEN it is going to happen and instead FEEL secure KNOWING this 3D world reflects what your INNER SELF HAS AND IS WITHIN.”

“In order to actually lose yourself in the imaginal act, one must accept it is real and let go entirely of the outer-world.”

“One must suspend rational thinking, and just accept it is real. They will free themselves that way in their mind.”

“You cannot be afraid anymore to feel and imagine what you want.”

“When I speak of feeling I do not mean emotion, but acceptance of the fact that desire is fulfilled.”

everything is all YOU. everything comes from YOU. YOU are the reason why things are like this. there’s legit no Universe telling you what you have to do. there isn’t anyone you have to follow to have what you want. no. that isn’t the point. the point is that you have been following yourself. everything has been you all along.

so basically about having that desire in imagination….. i know that you don’t have it physically in 3D but that does not matter. the thing you desire is the FEELING. please you must be very (excuse for my language) fucking stupid if you want it in the 3D.

imagine you already have your sp in the 3D, youve done the hard work and he’s/she’s yours now. great. you don’t feel anything, do you?

why do you want to be with your sp? ask yourself that.

im probably thinking that you want to be loved, yes?

bingo, that is the exact thing you desire. YOU desire to be loved. and guess what?

you are already loved. you legit don’t have to do anything to be loved. you are already loved. and i know, how tf am i loved when i’m single?

get that ‘single’ off your vocabulary. what’s important here that the 3D does not define you. put it inside your head. repeat that. remind yourself that.

the 3D is a reflection of your 4D. the 3D wouldn’t exist if the 4D never existed. the 3D lives off of the 4D (your imagination basically)

see? don’t tire yourself out by worrying about the 3D that you cannot change. it’s all in place, you cannot change it. the only way you can change it is by changing yourself.

no i do not want you to change your sp’s behaviour (remember eiypo) i want you to change your behaviour.

how?

well, how would you act and feel if you’re dating your sp?

would you still be worrying about the 3p? would you keep on checking his status if he’s online? would you be wondering if he loves you? would you be questioning on why he hasn’t came back?

all of that is useless! you’re basically still embodying as someone who’s desiring their sp. that is not what you want.

it is easy. you wouldn’t do all of those things. you already embody as someone who is in a happy relationship with your sp. you already know that you are loved. you never have to worry about them. you never feel stressed at all. you’re happy.

that is what’s important. you don’t have to be in the same state all the time btw, if you get reminded or get extremely anxious; just STOP FOR A SECOND.

don’t start affirming or start visualizing. don’t ask yourself if you’re doing it right. what is the point????? of asking that??????

instead, all you have to do is ‘know’ you already have them. leave it be. don’t meddle with it. trust that it has already happened. spoiler: it did ;)

don’t even think about the 3D, the 3D instantly changed because you changed. there is no such thing about waiting for the 3D to conform. there is no such thing about the 3D being your slave and has to obey you (let me tell ya i was confused when i saw those affirmations) the 3D and the 4D go by hand in hand. that’s the thing here.

so yeah.

i’ve read edward art’s works (plus other ppl) like few days ago so this is all the things i’ve learned. just in few days, how crazy is that lmao.

anyways, i hope you learned something from here, i also learned some new stuff while writing this.

bye 🫡

#law of assumption #neville goddard #sp #manifesting #manifestation #edward art #i hope it helped you ehehe

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arcplaysgames · 1 year

Text

Actually, no. lemme recap now because I bet once I meet the Big Bad and beat them it'll be like 2 hours of cutscenes and dialogue.

Where did I leave off-- REALLY? THAT LONG AGO? FUCK ME.

Okay SOMEONE remind me LATER to sum up Empress, because I completed it. Note to self, it's around 12/2 in your screencaps.

So Shido wins the elections because it turns out that no one saw the Thieves' big calling card for him, and those who did didn't remember it. There is obviously Some Shit going on with people's mass apathy syndrome.

Because Persona only has one theme and it's "people will be too lazy to pay attention to the truth, fucking sheeple," I guess.

/clucks tongue. I'm not really impressed by this turn of the story, I'm kinda Over the slow increase in apathy that winds up being the undoing of the world until we beat up a god and save everyone. This is the third time, I would have shaken shit up by having the Hidden Big Bad send the Thieves a calling card, demanding they come protect their Treasure, and then you meet the Big Bad and just gimme a villain with a motive, goddamn. It's a supernatural story, the sky's the limit!

I shouldn't kvetch too much yet. Anyway, Shido admits to his crimes, but the populace doesn't seem to care and still supports him.

Shido's lackeys basically go "okay Shido had a major meltdown buuuuuut we can still carry his agenda forward bc if we don't, we're all going down with the ship here."

Excellent question. In P4G I had a pretty strong idea what was doing that and here I do not, can y'all drop some hints?

Morgana points out that the general public has a Palace and has a Treasure. It's Mementos. So if the crew wants to force a mass shift in the world's perception, they can do that. But like all other Palaces, when the Treasure is taken, Mementos will collapse, to be replaced with new, corrected cognition.

In the process, the crew will lose their powers. Oh and Morgana is gonna die.

The game hasn't said that part yet but if they didn't kill Ryuji, they're gonna kill Morgana, fucking bet.

I love you, Morgana Notacat.

This was actually where I got my idea of what Morgana is. Morgana's upgraded Persona is Mercurius/Hermes. Yanno, the god of messages, of thieves, of swiftness, and well-known classic psychopomp.

Morgana keeps remembering himself being born in Mementos. He's without a doubt some manifestation of humanity's rebellion against systems, the literally cognitive patron saint of Phantom Thieves. He's a mascot in the most literal sense, an emblem of good luck for the Thieves' work.

Even the fact he's a cat kind of fits in nicely. Cats are free spirits who opt-into being it other people. They are creatures of choice.

I'm gonna be big sad when Morgana fucking dies lemme tell you. I'm pretty sure he's, like, sustained by Mementos and the plan is to collapse it? Yeah, Morgana is fucked.

Goddamn HERMES, that's so cool. Morgana, our psychopomp into the bowels of the collective unconsciousness.

GODDAMIT NOTIGOR WHAT DO YOU WANT, IT IS CHRISTMAS FUCKING EVE, YOU BETTER GIMME PRESENTS.

I know that you know that we all know that this isn't Igor but sometimes it fucking floors me how much he isn't Igor, jesus fucking christ. Who tf is this guy. I hope he's the Big Bad somehow bc there ain't anyone else at this point.

Please don't pull another It Was The Gas Station Attendant, Persona, I'm fucking on my knees begging you.

lmao i love the game poking the player to ensure they noticed Morgana is acting odd

Deep in Mementos is... this..... uh..... thing. A bunch of otherworldly veins flowing down into the core.

/looks nervously around

so uh. is it a hot take to say that, uh, the last segment of this game here, the Mementos Depths, is the ugliest place in the game? Just wondering because wow working through this place, I was struck by how completely aesthetically unappealing all of this is. It should be mysterious and eerie but mostly I am finding it.... blurgh. I thought Kaneshiro's Palace was pretty unappealing too, but this is bad enough I feel the need to remark on it.

/gestures at screen. What is all this????? oh god it reminds me of the Collector Base in Mass Effect 2. Except that game came out in 2010 for the previous generation console. /winces

Anyway.

The Depths of Mementos is a prison of complacency.

All of the Shadows the Thieves defeated are in the prison cells. They are relieved to be there, where they don't have to think. Everything is taken care of for them.

Man, remember back in Persona 3 when it turned out that defeating all the Full Moon shadows was actually the thing that doomed the world? Wouldn't it be hilarious is the Thieves fucked all this up the whole time? l m a o.

I honestly don't know if that's what's happening here yet, I haven't reached, like, the Explanation, but it does feel a bit like alllllllll the way back at the start of the liveblog when I was contending with the ethics of the entire idea of stealing someone's heart and what it does. The game went out of its way to justify doing it with Shido's attempted suicide, but the bridge to far for me (and thankfully for Ann too) was killing these people.

But now what happens seems to be akin to ego death instead, and.... I dunno, man, is that much different than murder?

SIGHS LOUDLY

okay is that true or is this another fucking situation where Izanami is like "WELL REALLY when you THINK ABOUT IT all I'm doing is giving humanity what they really want soooooooooo it makes you think huh, doesn't it make you think"

MAYBE THE GAME WILL PROVE ME WRONG, I DUNNO YET.

oh my god. oh my god.

IGOR!!!!!!!! IGOR IS IN THERE!!!!

LEMME IN!!!!!! LEMME IIIIIIIIN I NEED TO SEE HIMMMMM I NEED TO TALK TO HIM I MISS HIM sobs

yeah no, bet, it's igor's cell. which means Notigor locked him up? maybe Notigor is the final boss, that'd be great, it'd slot in perfectly with this place being a prison and Reverie having been stuck in the shitty Velvet Prison this whole time.

please igor help me, i'm so tired of the edgelord execution shit.

PSYCHOPOMP MORGANA!!!!!!!!!!

me pressing my face against the bars whispering I'll be back for you igor i love you

lol what if it isn't even igor in there can you imagine

#p5 #persona liveblog

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safetycar-restart · 2 years

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omega!max is known to be super grumpy around the paddock when alpha!reader isn’t there but when reader is there he melts like butter! so sweet and cuddly and clings to them! i’m talking sitting on their lap, playing with their hands and cuddling into their neck and god forbid anyone try to take him away… he will literally scream and cry until you calm him down again

Oh god you’re so right!! I never thought I’d be obsessed with soft omega max but honestly... I really am. This ended up being so long because I am Obsessed™️. Send me more clingy omega!max thoughts, I beg you.

So I think the main reason max has always been a grumpy omega is that he’s always trying to resist his instincts? The only way he’s managed to do that is just to be the most unapproachable person ever because if he’s nice, then he might accidentally purr or nuzzle or, heaven forbid, ask someone to nest with him.

So he chooses to be grumpy and mean instead, because that’s safer. There’s no chance of him embarrassing himself that way.

The problem is, he can’t do that with you. He’s never been able to resist his instincts around you, from the moment he met you he became a classic needy omega.

At first he was absolutely mortified about that and tried his best to avoid you. But you weren’t about to let him slip through your fingers.

It would take max a long time to be comfortable with having you come to race weekends with him, because he knows he won’t be able to control his instincts around you.

But eventually it reaches a point where max can’t stand race weekends because he has to be away from you. He truly is a very needy omega, wanting your reassurance and touch and scent all the time.

Maybe he asks you to come with when it’s a triple header all away from Europe? So he knows he won’t be able to see you at all during those three weeks and the thought alone is enough to make him panic because he knows he can’t do that long, he just can’t.

Of course you agree to come with, you’ve hated not seeing max for those few days every weekend too, but you’ve tried not to pressure him because you know that pressuring max would make him run away, and you don’t want that.

So you go to your first race weekend with max and even though you keep very much in the background, max still finds you and clings to you.

The entire paddock is in shock because they can’t believe how happy max is?? He smiled at the merc guys when he entered the paddock because he was holding your hand, the poor mechanics nearly had several heart attacks.

And his own team don’t know what to do either, Christian very nearly called the medical team in when Max showed up to a briefing early and happy.

He’s always at your side, or more accurately, you’re always at his. He’s always looking for you, making sure that he knows exactly where you are if he can’t be right next to you.

The moment the team realises that you make make max so much easier to deal with, they don’t bother trying to get max to attend strategy meetings on his own. He’s going to tell you everything they discuss anyway, so they may as well let you join them and have a happy max.

Max loves sitting on your lap!! He sits on your lap, talking happily to the strategy team and listening attentively to the brief from the marketing team and even begging through a speech from Marko without complaint all because he was sitting on your lap, could lean back and get nuzzles whenever he wanted them.

Of course there are times when you can’t be with him, when he’s in the car or doing media or the drivers parade. But before he does those things, he tucks you away in a nest? He basically hoards you.

And the nest must be perfect!! He works so hard on it because it’s for you. And you MUST stay in the nest the entire time. He’ll be so upset if he comes back and you’re not in the nest.

Even during races, he still wants you in a nest in his drivers room, not in the garage. Cause no! You’re his alpha!! His!! You must stay in his nest!! You can come outside with him when he gets back, he’ll take you anywhere in the paddock that you’d like to see.

And yeah, no one can try to take you away. He will simply not be able to function. Nevermind grumpy max, it will be sobbing and screaming max, begging for his alpha.

Needless to say, the team begs you to come with every weekend.

#omega!drivers #omega!max #mv #gn!reader #soft soft vibes

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what-do-1000-swords-look-like · 2 years

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The Sandor/Sansa conversation - 8x04

For me, this dialogue serves a dual purpose:

youtube

I know that hated line is in there (I still can't believe they wrote that but yeah) and it's meant to show how far Sansa has come (especially with "There was a time you couldn't look at me") but for me, this part right here caught my attention and showed me how it connected to something else, specifically Jonsa:

Sansa: "She could have made you happy for a little while."

Sandor: "There is only one thing that will make me happy."

Sansa: "What's that?"

Sandor: "None of your fucking business."

We know Sandor is talking about the revenge he wants to get on Gregor. That's the one thing he lives for, the thing he mentions when talking Arya out of hers in 8x05. But what struck me here is the wording and where it's happening.

We have the Dany/Jon 8x04 bedroom scene where it starts out as something possibly sexual but turns into something else, nothing romantic. We see that before this scene with Sandor, Tormund had been upset that Jaime had followed Brienne out of the room. We know he's got a thing for Brienne, wants to "make babies with her", but she never gives him the time of day. She has feelings for Jaime, while he has feelings for her, never really gets over Cersei and ends up leaving to go save her, despite Brienne's begging him to stay. We see Tormund pair off with a Northern girl, and in the background of this scene, we see Podrick go off with two Northern girls. We even see Gendry wondering where Arya is to which Sandor tells him "You can still smell the bodies burning and that's where your head is at." We then see that when he finds Arya, he instead confesses he loves her and proposes to her, which she kindly declines. We even have Tyrion bringing up the fact that Brienne is a virgin in their game. This part of the episode was all about sex, which makes sense after they survived this massive battle. It makes sense that they would feast, make merry, celebrate, and enjoy others' company. Tormund (the rejected) still had a thing for Brienne, that didn't change. Brienne (the rejected in the end) still had feelings for Jaime, that didn't change. Jaime still had feelings for Cersei, that didn't change. Podrick enjoyed himself immensely. Gendry still had feelings for Arya, that didn't change. Dany (the held off) still had feelings for Jon, that didn't change.

So that then brings me to the two people, the two main characters in this "love triangle" scenario, who didn't go to anyone for that type of company: Jon and Sansa.

Let's start with Jon. Jon doesn't go to anyone (including Dany). Instead, the first time we see him outside of the feast is him in his room, looking exhausted and almost worrying about something. Then Dany knocks on the door and that scene plays out. They don't end up having sex and she leaves.

Then we have Sansa. Sansa who is watching things play out between Sandor, Tormund, and the girls. This is literally coming right after Tormund had been telling Sandor how upset he was that Brienne went off with Jaime. So there is a connection to Brienne to Sansa here (which will come in later). And we get those lines above. But here's where those particular lines stood out to me: Littlefinger literally asks Sansa in 7x01 about what would make her happy:

Sansa: "What do you want, Lord Baelish?"

Littlefinger: "I want you to be happy. I want you to be safe."

Sansa: "I am safe. I'm at home surrounded by friends. I have Brienne to protect me from anyone who would harm me."

(as she says this, we get this scene playing out below)

Littlefinger: "What about happy? Why aren't you happy? What do you want that you do not have?"

Sansa: "At the moment, peace and quiet."

Littlefinger loved Sansa in his own screwed up way (which she says as much in 7x07), but not above his ultimate goal: the IT. Dany loves Jon in her own way, but not above her ultimate goal: the IT/her destiny. Not only is this another parallel for Jon and Sansa & more proof in the pudding that Jon was very much in Sansa's shoes with his own Joffrey, but it also connects them together, through Brienne and somewhat through Jaime and Tormund (in their own ways).

Because when you have the Brienne/Jaime scene, you have Jaime in her room under the guise of wanting to continue the game. "You didn't drink." "This is not a game. This is only drinking." "Suit yourself."

The scene has now been clarified that whatever happens next is not a game or a passing fancy. It's not sex for the sake of sex.

Brienne takes the cup and drinks. (she's open to it)

Jaime gets slightly nervous and starts to talk about the heat and there is some discussion about the North which turns into Jaime saying "I don't want things growing on me. How about Tormund Giantsbane? Has he grown on you? He was very sad when you left." (he takes a drink at this moment)

Brienne: "You sound quite jealous."

Jaime: "I do, don't I?"

Then he gets a bit nervous again and talks about the heat again, then continues trying to undress. Brienne helps him and then he starts to do the same for her. In the end, they are both topless. (this is all in front of the fireplace/open flames btw)

Jaime: "I've never slept with a knight before."

Brienne: "I've never slept with anyone before."

Jaime: "Then you have to drink. Those are the rules."

Brienne: "I told you--" (it's not a game)

Jaime kisses her. (Jaime knows it's not)

Scene ends with them passionately kissing and this is the next shot:

The beginning of the Jon/Dany scene.

Which ends and goes into the scene where we see Brienne sleeping peacefully and Jaime looking at her but also looking regretful or worried maybe. This is literally right after Jon and Dany discussed Sansa and how the truth about Jon will destroy Dany and Jon. He insists they can all live together which Dany doesn't like (because she requires absolute devotion from her followers/believers even if that means separating you from your family and isolating you), especially since he won't deter away from telling Sansa and Arya the truth about who he is.

The only parallel between these two scenes is that both relationships aren't sitting right with both men, for different reasons. But then when you watch the Jaime leaving scene:

youtube

We get lines like "You're not like your sister. You're not. You're better than she is." (remember Sansa's line to Tyrion earlier "What if there's someone else? Someone better?" & Jon's line to Tyrion in 8x06 "If the words of our houses were stamped on us at birth then I'd be fire and blood, too"?)

"You're a good man and you can't save her." (that whole 8x06 scene where Jon defends Dany's actions to Tyrion, besides being the writers vs the audience & then Jon giving Dany one last chance in the throne room scene)

"You don't need to die with her." (Sansa saying to Tyrion 8x04 "I don't want Jon to go down there.")

Jaime: "I would have murdered every man, woman, and child for Cersei." (not saying that the KL massacre is Jon's fault or that he did it for this similar reason but he was culpable - I don't think this wording is coincidental, especially after Brienne tells him in this scene that they know KL is going to be destroyed)

"She's hateful and so am I." (the way Nikolaj delivers this line made me immediately think of Jon's constant line of "She is our queen" * again makes me think of that Jon line "Then I'd be fire and blood, too")

He leaves without looking back and we see Brienne sobbing. She doesn't watch after him. (Jon leaves Winterfell this episode & we never see a goodbye between him and Sansa, not even one like the one they had in 7x02; when we see Sansa, her back is towards the gate Jon went out of and she's watching Dany as she flies overhead)

Braime has been paralleled to Jonsa before (so has Gendrya with other parallels) with the wave/looking back both do (which is a common romantic trope). But here's where I found it absolutely fascinating. Remember the drinking scene where Sansa encourages Jon to take the ale from Tormund?

Granted, this is not a drinking game, but just drinking to excess to celebrate. But they have Tormund offering the drink to Jon (very purposeful) and Sansa being the one to tell Jon that she believes in him (which involves her in some way). While this is meant to show how comfortable Sansa is with the wildlings (aka the True North as Tormund calls it) and where Jon is most comfortable (with the wildlings and his family), there is definitely a purposeful theme here. Not to mention when Tormund instead toasts Dany and then Dany toasts Arya, we get this shot right here:

We didn't need to see Sandor's reaction to the toast by Dany. It has nothing to do with Arya and Sandor's dynamic. So why show it? Because it all comes back to the undercurrent theme at this feast besides Dany's increasing anger/paranoia: Sansa and Jon, the other two sides to this love triangle.

It's only when Dany leaves the feast that we get the drinking game where Brienne's status is mentioned & Brienne leaves and then Jaime, Tormund cries to Sandor, then the Sandor/Sansa scene, the Gendrya scene, then the Braime scene, then the Jonerys scene. Back to back to back to back and so on.

Annnnd when Tormund goes to follow Brienne when she leaves, Jaime purposely gets up to block Tormund and then follow her himself. (where we saw Sansa get up to leave due to seeing Dany's smile at Jon & then Jon's distraction by Sansa leaving) We also see Tyrion pour wine into Tormund's horn, where he has been drinking ale or goat's milk all night. The same type of wine that Brienne and Jaime have been drinking in the game.

Where literally:

They have them all drinking/holding wine in their hands. And it's Tyrion who gives the wine to Tormund, Tyrion who said to Brienne "Because it's my game", was the one to comment on Brienne's status, and was trying to lay the groundwork for Jaime to be able to take a step further with Brienne (not just meaning sexually) and away from his unhealthy relationship with Cersei.

And we have Brienne leaving with Jaime following. We have Sansa leaving with no one following (not really leaving the feast). We have Dany leaving with no one following. We have Gendry leaving the feast to find Arya (a la Jaime).

So while no one follows Sansa or Dany, we do have one slight difference between the two:

Jon turns in the direction Sansa was once in, distracted by the movement behind him. He never turns back towards Dany, and in the next scene we even see he has his back to Dany still, and only looks over once when Tormund says what he says, and then turns back.

Having Kit do this movement here is very purposeful. Not only is it very apparent who Jon is and where he feels most comfortable, but they literally chose to turn him in Sansa's direction not once, but twice, in a sequence of scenes with others couples in this episode. We never once see this with Dany and Jon. As a matter of fact, we see Dany leave twice, once with the feast and once in the bedroom, and we never see Jon follow after her or go to find her.

It's all connected. Jonsa was very much a thing. That other line of the love triangle was very real. And it wasn't just Sansa having feelings with absolutely no return. Otherwise, Sansa would have been paralleled to Tormund more heavily here rather than Brienne. Brienne wouldn't be the connecting link for her period. When Arya (who is heavily paralleled to Jon with "I'm not a lady" with "I don't want it") turns Gendry down, she wouldn't have kissed him to let him know how much she still cares for him. Jon would have never turned in her direction when she turns to leave. He would never have been sitting opposite her on the table the way he was. If Sansa was truly an annoyance to him 24/7, we wouldn't have seen him enjoying himself with her at the very center of the group.

Jonsa was there all along.

#jonsa #jonsa meta #jon x sansa #got #game of thrones #gotposts #sorry this got long #but such good stuff #metaposts #jonsaposts

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stranger-rants · 1 year

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i wanna just say that i like the idea of billy being a dom mainly for the reasons that it fits the canon narrative in so far that a. it's what a lot of people would expect because he's masculine presenting etc etc etc, and b. because of societal pressures billy would be like 'fuck it, I'll dom' only to then repackage what a dom is in his image and do the most egregious brat things he can possibly muster, and c. it's a complete and utter facade that he's (sub)consciously begging someone to poke holes in. (which i realize is not really him being a dom at all but still....)

finding himself bored and/or disappointed every time he presses someone's buttons or pushes a boundary only for it to never be challenged. and then one day when it does? it's like those moments when two people are roughhousing and the character who's so used to being top dog suddenly gets tossed on their back and you see this wave of shock and awe wash over their face. it's that. where billy finally has someone push right back. and he goes, 'oh? ohhhhh. this right here.'

See, I am asexual but I am still a brat around people. So, I base a lot of this on myself I guess...

I get bored easily when I'm being a brat or play fighting and the other person doesn't push back, and growing up I was always viewed as the leader, the one you didn't mess with, the rough and tumble bruiser, et cetera and though I identify as agender and I was assigned female, I was always referred to as more masculine than the boys.

...but like, I want people to fight me. I want them to push back. I want people to tell me what to do, and I want someone who can match my energy or even surpass it. A lot of my friends who get that about me will literally pull me into their lap or tackle me or buy me stuff or whatever. Like, it's really funny.

Sure, Billy will act dominant but I don't think that's who he truly is 😁

I also go back to us both being Aries, and Aries are notoriously treated as dominant even though we're all brats who actively seek worthy "opponents" b/c we get bored EASILY. When Billy was introduced and he kept "bullying" Steve? That's just Billy seeking out a potential partner. He's SO HAPPY when Steve fights him back because that's what he wants. He wants a challenge, and if he doesn't get it then he gets pissed off.

(It's like for anyone who has watched/read MHA, Bakugou gets pissed when he wins especially when he wins easily because he wants a bigger challenge)

Don't ask why we're like this I do not know. It's a fun way to be, though. Never a dull day.

#asks #aries billy

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spectrum-spectre · 2 years

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ok but i Desperately want a ghost!eddie fic using the song Ghosts by Muse (my special interests are overlapping, send help)

"Now and then, my mind drifts to a place where I find you. Lost in my head, there are unsolved feelings that haunt me. It's too late to heal, I'll lay them to rest." Steve has nightmares about the void (where El goes sometimes to find people) and sees Eddie's ghost begging Steve to bring his body back so that he can finally rest.

"How can I move on when everyone I see still talks about you? How can I move on when all the best things i have we made/built together?" Eddie being talk of the town for being accused of satanic murders, going missing after the "earthquakes" and having his posters graffitid? The Party mourning another innocent victim of the upside down who died too soon; their friend? Feeling immense guilt for leaving his body and never being able to bury him?? Steve was originally jealous that the party had a new mentor/babysitter/big brother figure until he saw just how much Eddie loved and cared for the kids and how much they loved him back? He helped raise them, even if it was only for a little bit, and he taught them more about D&D, which aided in their fight against Vecna.

"Here's to letting go, but I am trapped in a void with your ghost and our memories" Steve being crushed because he doesn't know if his visions are real, let alone if he wants to lose Eddie again, because he just got him back in a sense and he feels so selfish for wanting to finally have some kind of relationship with the man who sacrificed himself to save their his kids.

"Lest we forget the great reset" Eleven closed all the gates, right?? but Vecna still finished the ritual, and all those cracks are now open in their world. it looks like the Upside Down is bleeding through into their dimension. what if the veil between their realities is thin enough for Eddie's ghost to slip through, long enough to pass along a message to the last person he was thinking about before he died?

"If I could bring you back, there are truths and confessions I'd tell you. I'd set things straight, and I believe that you would love and forgive me. I know it's too late, I need to let go." Steve never felt this way for a man before, let alone a literal dead man. but what if? what if he could Finally open himself up, to someone who he knew he could trust, and who wouldn't even be able to tell another soul about his feelings? He has Robin, sure, but he's too ashamed, too confused, too afraid to tell anyone else. what if this is the straw that breaks the camels back, and the kids don't love him anymore? what if Robin gets offended at him being a "fake gay?" or Nancy gets offended, because 'if you like guys, is what we had even real?' It's terrifying!

"How can I sleep with this coldness inside me? I know I can't bring back your love" But he wants to, he so desperately wants to know what it's like to hold Eddie in his arms and know that this is ok, this is real, and it's ok, that they'll be okay.

And what if? Oh so many what-if's run through his mind. What if he isn't able to open the gate again, and Eddie's soul will be trapped in the Upside Down for eternity, a limbo and a hell. But what if he brings Eddie's body back to their dimension, and his soul is able to come back with it? What if instead of passing on, Eddie returns to the living, like no time has passed, because we know time passes differently in that frozen hellscape underneath the Hawkins lab.

So what if he dares to hope? To believe that Eddie will come back to him, come back for him, bat bites healed up and scarred over. Proof that he fought, and that he lived, and that he's not going back down so easily next time (heaven forbid there be another next time). They'll have matching scars, their souls branded on each other's skin, showing the world that they belong to each other, and that nothing can separate them, not even hell, not even death.

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robin-in-the-tulip-tree · 7 months

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The Haunting of Skyhold: a Dragon Age Inquisition Fic

prologue:

Perhaps the scariest ghost stories are the ones where nobody’s dead.

A/N: please excuse any typographical errors; I am writing this with the assistance of a rambunctious puppy and he can’t read. I don’t have the heart to tell him he’s not helping. There will be swearing. There might be smut. I don’t entirely know how this will go; I haven’t done fanfic since I was a teenager, and I am an old. To hell with caveats, however. Let’s ride.

The air in Skyhold lacked its usual purposeful hum, and Lyn Trevelyan was relieved as hell about it. For one thing, the dawn was still in its infancy, crawling over the crest of the Frostback Mountains. It was too damn early by half for all but the gentlest of sounds. For another it had been a whirlwind tour of nightmares, at times in a very literal sense. Lyn was exhausted, but mercifully every living soul in that keep (and Cole) were exhausted as well. Between stopping a demon army in both the Western Approach and Adamant Castle, and literally, physically, plummeting off a crumbling battlement straight into the Fade itself, there was a raw, numb, hung-over feeling throughout the Inquisition’s forces that only a serious time of rest and recuperation could fix.

The final shock of the week however, she bore alone.

Well, not entirely. But in every way that mattered.

When she awoke to find an empty bed and a note pinned to the carving he was working on, Lyn was very clearly alone. And throughout the crisis that saw the man she loved, no matter what his name was, arrested and sentenced to hang, she was still very much alone. Leliana had obliged when Lyn begged her to come up with a plan, but by the looks that were exchanged around the war table, there was a palpable disappointment, a visible loss of respect.

Thom Rainier had returned to her still chained, with a shiner that matched his gambeson, and a beard that was far more crazed than usual. He spent that night in Skyhold’s dungeons, partially for his own safety. He was thankful for the iron bars between them when Lyn had come down to yell at him. If not for the firmly locked door, it was more than likely she would have thrown her staff down and personally beat his ass. Which he thoroughly deserved.

She had said some regrettable things to him, anyway. Cursed him for a son of a bitch for lying to the Inquisition, and then again for lying to her, and then a few more times. Then she turned it around on herself.

“How could I have believed you? How did anyone believe you? But especially me! I met some jackass in the woods calling himself a Grey Warden and I decided, gee, what a wonderful thing to do with my time, how about I fall for him. Great fucking idea. Best I’ve had since signing up to go to that Maker-damned Conclave. And that was before I found out that everything you told me from the word ‘go’ was a bald faced lie.”

All he had to say for himself was “That’s fair.”

“And it’s not the killing, dammit. Everyone on this shitty mountain has a kill count. Josephine’s killed before! It wasn’t what you did, it’s that you fucking had to lie about it. And you were just going to disappear into the night, be arrested, and eventually hanged instead of looking me square in the eye and owning up. You’re no kind of man.”

Lyn didn’t know whether to hold him or hex him, kiss him or slap that damn lugubrious hound-dog look off his face. But he was back. And before she could do any of those things, she’d have to put him on trial. In public. In front of the Maker, Andraste, and everyone. The very thought made Lyn feel queasy.

It was hard enough to carry the burden of her authority on any ordinary occasion, whether “banishing” an Avvar chieftain to Tevinter for lobbing goats at her walls, or sentencing the mayor of Crestwood to life in prison in Denerim for drowning half his town. In the end, she was only a woman, after all, who had lived for 43 quiet years as an unremarkable mage, and four very wild months figuring out how to be a big damn hero. So taking the throne to yield justice with all of Thedas watching, especially with Blackwa--Thom, excuse me, was the defendant, seemed beyond the beyonds. Would she be forgiven by her people for not being perfectly, stoically impartial? And more importantly, did she give a damn? She at least had to pretend to, right?

There was a small tendril of smoke rising to the sky from a valley not far away, barely visible through the mist. Lyn noted it with some curiosity. Not many came through this part of the Frostbacks on purpose, especially alone. She imagined she smelled woodsmoke, but it was probably bacon being charred beyond recognition by the cook. Skyhold would be stirring soon enough. Stirring slowly, she hoped. Lyn would have paid any amount of money for just one blessed uneventful day.

#blackwall x inquisitor #blackwall x trevelyan #dragon age inquisition #fanfic #prologue #fine dammit i hope you're all happy #boss makes a dollar i make a dime #so i write fanfic on company time

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