#IM SO SORRY I EVER DOUBTED

[donutdisturblivball]

i cannot believe the gabriel/beelzebub shippers were RIGHT. they went off of like a minute long interaction in s1 and RAN WITH IT and their characters got to run off together into the sunset because heaven is wherever they are and hell is wherever he is and THEY WERE RIGHT

#good omens s2 spoilers #good omens s2 #good omens spoilers #good omens #i actually dont know their ship name #ineffable bureaucracy #WOO FOUND IT #anyway im never judging people for shipping characters like that again YALL R JUSTIFIED #IM SO SORRY I EVER DOUBTED

[chirpsythismorning]

Thinking about the what if El was never interested in Mike romantically, she just assumed she was discourse on the tag today and how it's very possible what could make El fully realize this, is when in s5 she see's Will's love for Mike in real time, for the first time, and she's just like damn! That is not me!

#byler #no but arguably that already happened.. #remember that! you're the heart #el listening: you're the what now?? im sorry but that's corny as hell. could not be me! #i feel like this could be how el confronts will in s5 about lying to mike #i think it's interesting they had that talk with will and el about her lying to him with will calling her out #if to not circle back to it in some way for her to be like hypocrite much? #tho i doubt that's how it would happen #i have a feeling el is going to understand in will's case in contrast to her and mike's argument #like will and el are siblings so yeah they fight #but i just get the feeling she's going to sense something is up with them (already does) #and something big will happen and i feel like she's going to see the truth before they're able to #and i think will is probably going to realize last because he really does not think it could ever happen now #and also because of el i think will would feel like its wrong unless he was confident she would be okay with it #so i could totally see will not allowing himself to be happy in that sense even if he realized mike could return his feelings #but by then mike's already made his peace with el and they're good #UGHHGHHG s5 arrive now! #no but isn't it kind of side eye that they've never shown us el be confronted with mike and wills friendship at all? #like in s1 and s3 at the end Mike mentions will in his plans with el #and that's about where it ends #we have not seen her exposed to their dynamic and like reacting to it before #UNTIL THE END OF S4!!!

[buwheal]

BEACH OUTFIT 💥💥💥💥

He used to surf the web back in 98'.

#the clothes were so difficult for no reason i kept having to edit them #i actually really like this one lol #cunty uncle type thing going on #Also i love the HC that he as a plush tummy thats so cute and im stealing it #i was about to give him flipflops until i realized he cant do that #He had a dolphin print shirt but it looked ugly with the shorts and i really wanted the striped shorts lol #deltarune spamton #spamton #spamton g spamton #spamton fanart #deltarune #deltarune chapter 2 #i think it looks fine but still i hope it comes across he's resting his right arm on an invisible prop for the pose lol #there was a small little fella in the back of my mind who wanted to put him in a two piece but i couldnt sorry lmfao #edit: I forgot to write this out but I wanted to put it on any post bc i dont want to post a txt post just for this #but honestly he's gotta be some flavor of queer. #It doesnt matter to me which type all that much but I HC that even though he probably is #he has never been in a relationship and i dont think he ever will #he is so full of himself and he's kind of an ass tbh. That and i doubt he trusts anyone with what he's gone through #even if he got time to heal i dont think he'd ever trust someone enough to make a real relationship that way #Thats it thanks for coming to my ted talk #if you opened the tags here's your secret paragraph & im not sorry #BuwheArt

[snow-and-saltea]

something about titles for stories that sound utterly generic but it ends up being a masterpiece you binge read for two days straight. i love it so much. go read "my in laws are obsessed with me" on webtoon

rambling under the cut; some spoilers but nonspecific and vague

i fkn love so much the show not tell element in this story, it never feels like i'm being spoonfed information by having five speech bubbles in one panel. characters rarely say what they truly think or feel, atmosphere and mood are set solely by composition and art, some of the most heartbreaking and scared ive felt reading this manhwa had NO speech bubbles at all and there was no fancy effects or sfx you'd normally see in comics. the world goes on normally while you see a character in pain, full body wailing with grief at the ache of heartbreak. i teared up and i didnt even know what her voice sounded like, i didnt know what thoughts were going through her mind or the overwhelming bodily sensation of emotional pain that must've wrecked her. the build up of seeing an adaptable, grounded and sometimes cute and awkward person you've gotten to know over 50 ish chapters, only to then see her doubling over in pain and screaming, soundlessly to my ears. one of the most visceral experiences ive had recently.

i don't even care if i sound like im being biased or gassing this manhwa up btw Who Give A Shit bc not me!! i will talk about the things i like about bc i like them!

i love the mc / fl most of all because of how she's such... a neat vessel to the world. not spoiling it about her backstory and disposition and such, but the way she, on paper, sort of fits into that niche of people who don't know how much they matter to people around them. usually in regression / revenge stories with an insecure low self esteem FL, they start out really defensive, angsty / edgy, and then mellow out as they receive love. but our FL is reasonable, even-tempered and logical - that her emotional "insecurity" in regards to being tethered to people around her is mostly rooted in her own "seeing is believing" mentality and understanding, somewhat sympathetically, why people wouldn't / don't like her, and she doesn't really take it to heart.

what's funny is that even when people are subtly showing adoration and love for her, she doesn't know how to take it to heart, and she gets uncomfortable and awkward about it. not in a usually fluffy "this is so moving that i cant respond sensibly" way, the way most loved FLs usually pass by as a marker to Growth, but because it puts her in an awkward situation and she doesn't know what to do about it. she gets a little embarrassed but doesn't overreact, because she probably doesn't realise the depth of their affection and doesn't attribute it to herself directly, but rather by other people's kindness. multiple times she's been surprised at when someone (who didn't before but has now warmed up to her) responds kindly to her inquiries, and while i understand her surprise, it's still funny and a little sad to me that she was prepared to take it in stride if people STILL didn't like her after all the ways she's benefitted them.

in other words pereshati you're my queen and i love you. literally who would not love her. her ease and understanding at being distrusted makes her ironically easier to trust because she doesn't hold anything against you and understand that you need to form your own judgement, even if it doesn't turn out well for her. literally who is doing it like her. queen

#yuu rambles #yuu reads #ougjfhdhfjdhfhfjfj I LOVE THIS MANHWA A LOT. SOMEONE READ IT WITH ME #my in laws are obsessed with me #initially got reading it being like oh wow cheesy ass title but i see it get recommended all the time #and now im like. im so sorry i ever doubted you girl. this is one of the best manhwas ive read this year #granted its only like march but still #SOMEONE TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS MANHWA PLEASE

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

STARS OF THE SHOW

#I FEEL SICK #I FEEL ILL #IM GONNA THROW UP #I GET IT NOW.... I UNDERSTAND..... #AUGHHJJJH #shirachuu baby im so sorry i ever doubted you at all youre everything #caps cw

[jingerhead]

Kazuki returning to the apartment after coming to terms with moving on from his wife's death was just one step away from

#buddy daddies spoilers #buddy daddies #random thoughts from jinger #i joke but poor rei really wasnt prepared ;-; #he did his best #this was such an important episode for the both of them #everything about it was amazing #karin im so sorry i ever doubted you sweetie why did they make you look so creepy and scary in that endscene #youre literally the most sweetheart i wanna hug you #this episode was kazuki taking the first steps to heal from his trauma and rei the fun dad finding fun and responsible balance #this poor man didnt know where the hospital was jfc #buddy daddy spoilers

[sneez]

the other day i was looking through the drawings on my old laptop and found this self-portrait art challenge thing i did at some point several years ago, so i thought it would be interesting to update it with my current self for old times' sake :-) i don't know why i felt the need to be so mean to myself in all the descriptions but i have tried to be at least slightly nicer this time around. sorry past me [id under cut]

[id: a series of four full-body digital drawings of a pale-skinned person at different ages. the first three depict me in 2007, 2013, and 2017 under the heading 'George'; the fourth, in a different art style, depicts me in 2023 under the heading 'Ned (I changed my name)'.

the first drawing shows a young child with long hair wearing a fluffy pink jumper, a pink skirt, and pink shoes. bullet points above read:

annoying

copies other people constantly

draws cute animals

arrogant

cries when told off

maybe 1 friend

the second drawing shows a young teenager wearing a hoodie and trainers and looking uncomfortable. bullet points above read:

anxious

listens to Simon and Garfunkel exclusively

bad under pressure

anime

writes bad fanfiction

draws bad fanart

the third drawing shows a smiling teenager wearing a plaid shirt, jeans, and brown boots. bullet points above read:

what the HELL is a Self Esteem

really into 60s music

cries a lot

0 fashion sense

usually dissociating

thinkin about trees

the fourth drawing shows a young man with messy brown hair, a striped brown shirt, a beige woollen tank top, and burgundy plaid trousers; he is leaning on a wood-textured folding cane and holding the strap of a brown leather satchel with his other hand. bullet points above read:

still no self-esteem but medicated now

significantly worse handwriting (wrist knackered)

I haven't changed much to be honest

RBF so severe I get followed around by the security guards at the supermarket

autism

end id.]

#artwork #two posts in two days what is happening to me. ive been possessed #i think i did a decent job at capturing my likeness this time around :-) i doubt i'll ever post another picture of myself here (sorry i am #a nervous creature now) so hopefully this will suffice. i kind of look like [gestures] #i really like patterns. and stripes especially. also brown. if you couldnt tell #i am actually doing much better recently! i had what i think in retrospect was a nervous breakdown a few weeks ago but i am ok now. all gud #it was very contextual i had just got myself into a very stressful situation and basically just self-destructed for a few days until it was #resolved. the resolution was very satisfactory though so im mostly back to normal now #also i started taking antidepressants a couple of months ago and i think they have finally started working so i am in a much better place #than i have been for a while :-) yippee! #it's pretty neat to see how much my art style has changed too. i love using gouachey watercoloury brushes these days #anyway i hope you are all doing well my friends! it is my birthday tomorrow im going to be 8 million years old

[bloodsbane]

You know you’re so right with the whole Laios’ desire thing and tbh? It never say right with me that the other characters never really accepted or embraced his traits. They were always quick to judge and voice their distaste for his quirks all the way up to the end. I’m not criticizing the creator of course but mainly addressing the character flaws that are present in the characters and how tbh is reflected in even the fandom now that the anime adaptation is rolling out. Peak autism experience😭

yeah, it's just a bit rough, being such a fan of him! and i didn't mean to imply there's no broad acceptance of laios, because obviously we see everyone become close and (particularly near the end, after the Big Events but before the Big Dinner), there's that moment where everyone demonstrates they care about laios and are glad he's safe and alive, even if they could be mad for all the trouble that got caused by his actions.

i do think, in the end, his friends understand him better than they did. they might not click with all aspects of him, but it doesn't mean they don't care. still, it's difficult to see laios express himself so earnestly and it constantly be treated with bemusement at best and outright disgust or aggression at worse

idk maybe it's a thing to hope for in his future... maybe with time it's something that could change

#baneanswers #i cannot remember so i may be wrong - i haven't reread the latter half of the manga yet #but i wanna say there is not ever a moment where anyone apologizes to laios to his face about thinking the worst of him? #like even just that much. 'im sorry i never tried really understanding where youre coming from or how this might be making YOU feel' #i feel like falin is the only one who even tries to be tuned into laios' thoughts and feelings and gives him the benefit of the doubt #and that's only bc she actually knows him obviously!

[astranauticus]

the rwd season 4 qna inspired me to start thinking about college au headcanons except a lot of these are gonna be really specific to my school and y'all are just gonna have to deal with that <3

Kyana feeds some of the school cats. she would feed all of them if she could

Dani smuggled Plug (the scrawniest black cat you've ever seen) into her dorm room illegally and somehow management hasn't caught her yet (based on a true story) (Kyana visits to see Plug all the time)

Finbar keeps an updated tier list of every canteen in the school with breakdowns of the best stalls/dishes for each

A senior from the school of engineering once said to me 'all the engineering people dress like rats cuz our classrooms don't have aircon' (context: tropics) anyway that's Dani

Kyana would probably be involved in a lot of freshman orientation events from second year onwards. she just likes talking to the new kids and giving them advice like she would be the kind of orientation group leader who'd get messages from her freshies asking about all kinds of random nonsense because she's made sure they know they can always contact her with questions

VR-LA is The Guy you go to for textbook pirating resources

(this is more of a 'wouldn't that be funny' but VR-LA is just Veerle's discord handle)

Docent is the name of VR-LA's old laptop that broke down so he gave it to Cassimere (computer engineering major he met once at a networking event) to fix except Cassimere got everything off the hard drive and then somehow managed to fuck it up Even More so he had to get a new laptop (and named it Emi)

Roy has gotten food poisoning from his dorm meal plan at least once (based on at least one true story)

The heap trio + Mandy would be those friends constantly playing majong in the dorm lounge and if all the majong tables are taken they just play in one of their dorm rooms on a towel to dampen the tile shuffling noises (it was Mandy's idea)

Every morning Dani goes to the drinks stall at her faculty and orders one iced coffee to the point where the stall owner starts preparing an iced coffee whenever they see her approach (based on my true story)

Roy would be one of those people who goes clubbing every other week and every time he tries to drag the rest of the heap trio and Egan almost always goes and Dani would go if she didn't have a good excuse but always begrudgingly. anyway Roy would always be the only one having a good time until Egan gets drunk enough to start having fun

Finbar actually uses the dorm kitchens instead of just buying canteen food and it always makes the hallways smell really good

Vhas also uses the dorm kitchen sometimes but like. one time i walked into the pantry on my floor and someone had left cut sweet potatoes and 2 eggs in an inch of water in a pan on the stove. that's Vhas

Kyana's constantly applying for overseas exchanges and international summer/winter school programmes. the world is large and she wants to see it!

Maxim's the definition of a hall phantom. you know he lives on your dorm floor because you pass him by in the hallways sometimes and literally nowhere else. sometimes you're not convinced that he actually exists

VR-LA and Maxim's friendship stems from them being from wildly different faculties (VR-LA's in STEM, Maxim's doing anthropology so arts/social sciences) but also having lots of weird interests they cant really bug anyone in their home faculties about

Elyse is in student government and every once in a while Finbar receives a series of angry texts about the newest idiocy she's had to put up with

MR-SN and AS-TR start a stargazing club together. other notable members include AS-TR's girlfriend E-DN, MR-SN's friend C-RA (the one who always volunteers to carry the heavy ass telescopes) and MR-SN's friend K-LB who he pestered into coming to fix one of the wonky scopes even though K-LB's actually in electrical engineering but he's the only engineering person MR-SN (an arts student) knows

oh and of course VR-LA joins because he genuinely just likes space (developing a crush on his club chairperson was not on his bingo card)

Kyana and E-DN were MMA sparring buddies at one point which is how she found out about the stargazing and joined immediately

honestly i can probably think of more but this post is fuckin long LMAO

#rolling with difficulty #'do not let the internet turn you into an american' i say as i make posts that can be understood by me and me only #i mean im not sorry about it this is my house #like my experiences are just gonna be extra incomprehensible because my countrys fuckin tiny so the target audience really is me and me onl #too bad! you think its hard to read my posts? i gotta live like this! #if i sound extra confrontational i got 5 hours of sleep for the whole week unfortunately so just know its all /lh more or less #really tempted to make some kind of business major joke for roy even though obviously the heap trio would all be in engineering #bc its just common knowledge in my school that business majors are the ones with the most free time to go clubbing all the damn time #and *also* theyre the faculty that dresses the best which also tracks?? #didnt really nail down specific majors for everyone (besides the obvious ones like food science for finbar and mech eng for dani) #but i kinda like the idea of cs for VR-LA because of that 'programmers are real world wizards' joke and also.. projecting #cs with focus area in AI would even make sense bc of docent and emi. if i want to make the projecting Even Worse! #also if i ever do human designs for the old crew (doubtful cuz i find drawing robots more fun than drawing humans) #look up sally hansen hypnautical nail polish bc i wanna give human AS-TR that as a nod to her original design #didnt really get into the fashion of it all bc again i live in the tropics so nobody really dresses well here #the goal is to dress to not sweat more often than it is dress to look good #hands down my favourite line in the cqna was noir's i thermoregulate through my forearms #so in the middle of summer i still wear all black and just roll up my sleeves #like thats ME. except its summer ALL YEAR ROUND #walao #asto speaks

[edmeedame]

Meeting the other githyanki you don't realize how nice Lae'zel is actually

#holy shit theyre so mean #and for what #lae'zel im so sorry i ever doubted you #and youre telling me shadowheart infiltrated a creche? #damn #lae'zel #baldurs gate 3 #edme things

[transmechanicus]

putting myslef on blast for no reason but i've only had one major relationship and it was for like 3 years from high school into the first semester of college and then in like a 2 month window they cheated on me with like 3 ppl simultaneously and then tried to spin it as forming a poly relationship, as if that's something you can just Do without any kind of input from your Current Long term partner and the sting of that betrayal is never gonna heal imo, like in my more forgetful moments i'll be like "Oh if I'd done X maybe they'd still be in my life and they could see how good I'm doing rn" and i have to remind myself that actually everything i've achieved has been directly in spite of them and the 2 year crushing depression they left me in right at the start of my college education, this concludes the Erika secret lore dump <3

#my stuff #like im willing to own up in court that they probably started cheating bc i was busy as hell with school and work and unable to give them- #the attention they wanted #but they sucked massive dong when it came to communicating at all and i retroactively understand they were manipulative as hell #so me not being a Perfect Angel due to a Massive Increase In Responsibilities was just an excuse #also steams me like a lobster that one of the ppl they cheated on me with was liek... literally a younger. prettier version of me #like i could've been siblings w that person they were just like 2 years younger and objectively more of a femboy #i doubt it would ever happen but i low key wonder if my popularity on this site has ever brought me onto their dash like #lmao they would not recognize me at this point i am so utterly improved in every way #like no no no me circa 2016 is not a gf. THIS (insert transgender explosion) IS A GF #sorry for ranting i will now be killed by firing squad <3

[pawphin]

i finished hxh earlier todau and im a sopping wet pathetic mess

#i dont have the words #but. genuinely i think its the best thing ive ever watched #im so fucking sorry for doubting you chimera ant arc you are by far my favorite #i think my ranking is 1. chimera ant 2. election arc 3. hunter exam 4. yorknew 5. heavens arena 6. zoldyck family estate 7. greed island #and for comparison i fucking love greed island #this show is so fucked up and and and and and and #i cant watch the 6th opening and 5th ending without crying

[saturnisfallingdown]

"Why are you doing this?"

"Charlotte is my friend."

"That's it?"

"... Yeah."

you dont get it this is everything. It's telling the audience that they're friends and that is enough to motivate OW. they're friends!!!

#HE LOVES HER SO MUCH!! FRIENDSHIP IS REAL AND IN DBDPOD #death by dying im so sorry i ever doubted you and feared that charlotte and ow would end up a romance i never shouldve doubted you #death by dying spoilers #death by dying

[todayisafridaynight]

youre so right omg literally barely see anybody talking abt mine and Daigos special bottle of sake like that’s so ???? tragic????? it’s so sad and gut wrenching in a way i can’t explain like it’s probably still there in shellac collecting dust on the shelf……. they make me feel SICK

i cant stress how special Kirin's Dream is to me, like genuinely it's probably my favorite rggo story bar mine and daigo's goofy bar date gone wrong because it makes me so indescribably emo after reading it

#snap chats #every day i think about how daigo was adamant on not drinking from it because mine didnt want to drink without him #like daigo i cant speak for your romantic capabilities but that was the most romantic shit i ever read in my life #at the very least definitely something id read in a romance/tragedy or some shit no wonder kashiwagi yoinked that for his sob story #IN ANY CASE NO LIKE ...... the fact even the bartender thought mine and daigo's memories were special enough to keep going #im gonna be sick thinking of that bottle collecting dust for decades with no intention of ever opening it #this is why i love minedai though its a tragedy. theres no stopping it. daigos distraught and no one can help him #ACTUALLY goodbye i cant have anyone look at me #every time i think of daigo calling mine an idiot at the end of the story i do think of bakamitai im so sorry #i know the singer's calling themselves an idiot but nevertheless.... daigo bakamitai when so i can throw up #im allowed to think daigo blames himself or feels guilty about doubting if mine loved him (romantically or platonically) #i have to post this now before i just ramble for twelve years

[frecklystars]

i dont know what's wrong with me but i always feel so sad and heartbroken when i see Colt.

like i feel so overwhelmed with love for him but i really cannot imagine him loving me back. like. like. he's everything. and i'm just keri. y'know.

augh. it feels... impossible. like i am not Good Enough for him. he would not look twice at me. i didn't used to have this problem until i was abused for so long and now it's like... i cannot imagine receiving love unless if it is through violence. oogh. hurts my heart like a motherfucker. i miss the old me.

#before this year happened i was always SO 100% ready to self ship #i would look at ANYONE. any any ANY character in the WORLD #and i'd be like. oh they'd love me!!! no doubts in my mind whatsoever. they LOVE me!!!! even the worst villains ever!!! #BUT nowadays im constantly like. ok i am not good enough. i am not pretty enough #i am not [insert word here] enough no matter what i'd do to change my appearance or personality to fit someone's desires #i *never* used to look down on myself THIS often and to THIS degree #now i genuinely believe that i cannot be loved unless it is through violence #or that im only desirable if im in a vulnerable position where im in pain or hurting bc i was told it made me 'cute' #and like?? it's stupid? they're fictional? why can't i just... stop thinking that lowly of myself? #my abuser is gone so why am i still believing all of the things they said to me?? #i want Colt to love me for Me. i want Ken to love me for Me #but i also feel like. im unlovable to them unless if im useful or... bleeding or beaten up or something. christ #TF f/os are gone. out the window. i lost them. and im so scared of losing my Ryan F/Os too when i need them so badly #idk how to be myself bro i dont know where the old me is!!! #im being stupid im sorry i just gotta throw this into the void 😭 #vent #delete later #abuse mention