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adhd-merlin · 9 months

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Merlin S1 rewatch: episode 5

here we go! again!!

today we are watching the Lancelot episode. just a few random comments because. I am so very sleepy and I deleted the first draft by accident.

A nice little episode all in all. Nice set up for an incredibly sexy recurring character. Some nice foreshadowing. What's not to like?

• I like how this episode opens. Merlin picking mushrooms, looking so baby. Eyes full of awe and wonder. Looking like... like he's never seen a mushroom in his life, in fact. Anyway, something very cottagecore about this. Fairy vibes.

• Also he's scarfless? For much (most?) of the episode? It looks like early in the series they weren’t so obsessively attached to Merlin’s neckerchief as part of his character design

• I love how Merlin doesn’t even try to use magic against the Griffin. He just falls on his back, shuts his eyes and goes, “Welp, guess I'll die”

• HOW DID MERLIN CARRY LANCELOT BACK TO CAMELOT

• “Ever since I was a child I've dreamed of coming here. It's my life's ambition to join the knights of Camelot.” -> Guy who's spent his whole life dreaming about becoming a knight of Camelot doesn’t know the first thing about the job requirements

• (No but really, the funniest thing about this episode for me is Lancelot’s utter shock at finding out only noblemen can be knights. That's, like. The first thing about the knights of Camelot, it seems like. You’d think he would have done some basic research beforehand. But that's also how I apply to jobs so I won't make fun of him too much)

• Merlin is such a hype man, “LANCELOT THEY'RE GOING TO LOVE YOU!!” This is literally what he says! He’s adorable.

• Merlin's acting like a kid who's found a stray puppy on the side of the road and is trying to convince his dad to keep him. “He’s great, you’ll love him, I promise. He won’t be any trouble I’ll walk him every day”

• MERLIN: “He's saved my life” / ARTHUR: “That's blown it for starters” -> ARTHUR IS FUNNY. I just feel the need to point out that Arthur is funny, actually. Especially when he’s being a cunt.

• MERLIN: “You're not a nobleman by any chance, are you?” / LANCE: “haha, good lord, no” -> someone didn’t read the job description 👀

• The way Gaius pointedly glares at Merlin after telling Lancelot he’s sorry he can’t be a knight… Like, he knows his son might be tempted to do something stupid about it (commit crime)

• I did not remember Lancelot’s tragic Origin Story!

When I was a boy, my village was attacked by raiders from the northern plains. They were slaughtered where they stood, my father, my mother. Everyone. I alone escaped. I vowed that day that never again would I be helpless in the face of tyranny. I made sword craft my life. Every waking hour since that day, I devoted to the art of combat, and when I was ready, I set forth for Camelot.

"Every waking hour since that day, I devoted to the art of combat" -> Yeah that sounds like a sane and healthy way of dealing with the trauma of losing both your parents and your entire village in one go, well done my boy

• Merlin looks SO proud of his little fraud scheme! BE GAY DO CRIME

• Seriously he is such an instigator! He says, “DAMN THE RULES, THE RULES ARE WRONG”! But he can see Lancelot’s obvious reluctance so he’s like, “We're not breaking the rules, we're bending them” HE’S SO SNEAKY I LOVE HIM

• This is such a basic narrative trope (if it even is a trope) but I love first meetings of characters who are going to become famously important to one another. I'm talking, like, Holmes and Dr. Watson. Or yes, Merlin and future King Arthur. There’s just something about it that I find delightful. "They don’t even know!! They have no idea. But I do!" This is about Gwen and Lancelot.

• Such a cute Meet Cute™. I love the way it plays with what we know is going to happen. Even if we don’t exactly know how it's going to happen in the series, Guinevere and Lancelot’s romance is the stuff of legends. I love their obvious and immediate mutual attraction. The slight awkwardness. The foreshadowing! “I'm not a knight yet, my lady” / “And I’m not a lady.” NO YET, BUT YOU WILL BE!! AAAAAH

• I didn’t pay much attention to it the first time I watched this episode but Lancelot speaks in such a formal, lofty way compared to everyone else. He literally sounds like he walked out of a book of chivalric romance. "I faced it myself, Sire. Some days past. I struck it full square. I wondered how it endured"; "Arthur stands in mortal peril", like WHO TALKS LIKE THIS. BE NORMAL. But it never crosses the line into being obnoxious, and I love how his character is defined through his speech as well as by his behaviour. Well done, writers.

• LANCELOT: "Are you two...you know" -> Lancelot wastes no time in checking if Gwen is on the market. GOOD FOR HIM. (I like how Merlin finds the idea of dating Gwen literally laughable. Bit harsh, that).

• “She seems lovely. Guinevere.” / “Oh, yeah. Yeah, she is. And the best seamstress in Camelot, I promise” -> MERLIN THIS MAN DOES NOT CARES ABOUT GWEN'S SKILL AS A SEAMSTRESS OPEN YOUR EYES YOU SILLY CHILD

• (But no, to be fair to him, he did notice)

• Arthur just... just BITCH-SLAPPING Lancelot out of the blue is actually hilarious. He's a comedian and he doesn't even know it.

• Merlin still acts like a bit of a teenager with Gaius in this ep. When Gaius discovers his forgery of the seal of nobility, Merlin tells him, “if you wanna punish me for it, go ahead” and then walks off! I’m sorry, this is a teenager acting out against his dad.

• Merlin does seem to be still testing boundaries with Gaius, but in a way that's an obvious request for reassurance, too – later in the episode he asks him: “Do you even care what happens to me?” (!!) And back in episode 1x02, when Gaius said, "What do I do if you get caught?", Merlin asked: "what would you do?" Insecure teen behaviour. Please Gaius just tell him you love him!! (He does tell him here, thank God).

• The broomstick fight scene. Much has been said about it already. The rituals are, indeed, intricate. Something so homoerotic about Arthur’s attempts to poke Lancelot in the chest with his stick. What I want to know is – did they know? Did they know when they were filming it that it would look like this. Like, was it deliberate

• @sapphickittykatherine it’s not much but there are some hints of Morlance in this ep. During Lancelot’s knighting scene, Morgana looks at him with obvious interest and asks “Who is this man?” And also later at his celebration (I’ll get to it).

The celebration scene! I love it! I’m gonna break it down into parts:

• “You played God, Merlin" -> I like this line. I think Gaius put his finger on an important character trait of Merlin’s here. He always means well, but he can be manipulative and controlling. Not so much here, perhaps, but it does emerge more in later eps.

• Not Arthur looking at Morgana with incestuous intent 💀💀💀

• “Tell me, do you think her...beautiful?” / “Yes, Sire. I do.” -> Another favourite trope of mine – two characters talking to each other but having two entirely different conversations. A bit like that cursed scene in the Disir, and with Arthur just as much oblivious (actually, could someone tell the poor guy what's going on. just once)

• Meanwhile, Morgana’s making sexy eyes at Lancelot while biting into a… cherry? I can’t tell. Some kind of sexually-connoted fruit, that’s for sure. I love how she also looks murderous while doing it. Praying mantis energy.

• Merlin and Gwen’s conversation is so cute. I’ve said it before but it’s giving girlie-and-her-gay-best-friend vibes. Look at them! They are a woman and her gay friend sitting in a bar, exchanging notes about the men around them. Over drinks. The way Merlin encourages Gwen to commit mischief too! “OH YOU ARE NO FUN GWEN. COME ON, JUST PLAY ALONG. WHO WOULD YOU RATHER F—”

• Arthur or Lancelot? I think I know what Merlin’s answer would be. At least at this point in the series. (Hint: it's not Arthur).

• “I think our Sir Lancelot might have eyes for you, Gwen” -> Merlin playing matchmaker already. I love that he’s noticed, and that he’s trying to push these two together because LOVE MUST TRIUMPH. He’s such a romantic.

~ END OF THE CELEBRATION SCENE ~

• Oooh no, Lancelot’s ruse has been discovered, SIR YOU’RE UNDER ARREST

• “You are not worthy of the knighthood bestowed upon you. You never were. And you never will be” -> possibly the worst thing anyone could’ve said to Lancelot, SIR PLEASE STOP YOU’RE BREAKING HIM. CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S ABOUT TO CRY.

• All I can think about when I see gifs of Merlin talking to imprisoned Lancelot is, “it’s okay hun”

• It’s interesting to see S1 Uther so unwilling to accept that the creature they’re trying to defeat might be magic when later in the series he will relish the chance of accusing anything and anyone of being magic. ...Growth?

(The bisexuality of this scene. Off the charts.)

• It seems to me like they were setting up Lancelot to be more of an important character that he ended up being? I mean, he was important, just by virtue of being Lancelot, but he was in a grand total of 6 episodes. But, I love that we can see Arthur’s obvious attachment (for lack of a better word) to him already. A bit like with Gwen and Lancelot, it hints at what’s to come – he is destined to become Arthur’s favourite knight (I know people like to say that it's Leon, but I think it was Lance. And after Lancelot's death it was Mordred, eventually. If you must know.) I love it, foreshadowing. You can feel the future hanging heavy in the air.

• I didn’t remember that Gwen and Lancelot met again and she begged him not to go and I think they should have kissed here

• It’s so funny that while Merlin’s trying to master the spell to defeat the Griffin, Gaius goes, “Don't worry Merlin, we have plenty of time” GAIUS NO YOU LITERALLY HAVE LESS THAN 2 HOURS

• Actually this is a thing Gaius does a lot, telling Merlin he can make it when the chances of success are pretty slim, which on one hand is very sweet, like I get it he's being a supportive dad, but on the other hand it's also... setting Merlin up to be HUGELY DISAPPOINTED if he fails? I don't know, just something I've noticed in other eps.

• The scene of Lancelot killing the Griffin is actually pretty cool? I like the glowing blue spear (how did Merlin think Lancelot wasn’t going to notice) and THE SOUNDTRACK!!

• Merlin's PURE JOY after Lancelot's killed the Griffin is SO adorable, you just feel so happy for him. YES BABY YOU DID IT!!

• I love the parallel “You did it!” scenes with Arthur & Lancelot, Gaius & Merlin, and Arthur & Uther. Very nice, big fan of symmetry

• Gaius’s pride when Merlin comes back victorious is so heartwarming. I’ve said it before but I'll repeat it, Merlin and Gaius’s relationship is possibly my favourite in the show. I think Gaius doesn’t get enough credit for being Merlin’s main source of love and hugs during his Camelot years.

• “The Code bends for no man” / “Then THE CODE IS WRONG!” (!!) -> SAY IT LOUDER MY MAN!! S1 Arthur is so vocal with his father about what he believes is right and wrong, we love to see it

• Lancelot saying he must prove himself worthy of being a knight – of course, he might have been holding the spear that killed the Griffin but he wasn’t the one who actually defeated it, and this will not do. He must now abandon his life-long dream of being a knight and go fight strangers in a cage for money. It’s the only logical next step.

• LANCE I LOVE YOU BUT WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

THE END!!

next episode is... one no one really cares about, but I really really liked it the first time I watched it so. hopefully it will live up to what I remember :3

#there. i've re-written it pretty much.#*me; tears in my eyes* “I do this for fun”#“actually i can just go” < now lives in my head as a lancelot phrase and it cracks me up #you'll find i go on about merlin and gaius quite a bit in these #that's because i love them #they mean a lot to me *taps own bio*#merlin's body count: still 1 #< disappointing actually. like he killed a witch in ep 1 and then 4 eps of nothing. DO BETTER #rewatch1.jls

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some-pers0n · 11 months

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Happy New Year!!

Fandom: TF2

Characters: Engineer, Medic

CW: Drinking. A lot of drinking.

Summary: It's New Years Eve and the pair decided to go out for a drink or two. Thirteen hours later and with the other mercs joining in as well, they're still at the bar. It's fun, definitely, but Engie can't help but feel something a bit...off when looking at Medic.

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: Violently sobbing and pounding my fist against the ground. I finally got to the part of my fic where this stupid chapter/scene happens. This has been rotting in my brain since December. Anyways, this is an excerpt from the most recent chapter of my longfic. You don't need to read it to understand anything. Enjoy.

Engie watched in awe as Medic pounded back his twenty-second glass of beer. By god it was impressive.

They'd been in here for a long while now. How long? To Engie, maybe an hour. But, he knew damn well it's been longer than that. He can see the light outside, or more accurately the lack thereof. They'd gotten here at ten and now it's deep into the night. He'd look at a clock, but things were rather hazy and hard to read now.

He wiped the residue from his lips. "Yet another one down, haha!!" he yelled. A quirky thing with him was how he lost any and all control of his voice the minute he got slightly intoxicated. Doesn't matter. The music's loud and Engie couldn't care less. The hangover and hearing loss was a problem for tomorrow.

Tonight? Why not have some fun? Relax. Kick his feet back and enjoy. He deserves it after all that nonsense back at the base. A nice full day out at the bar, bleeding the owner out of all of their supply.

Engie clapped in response. "Hell yeah! Number twenty-two! Think you could go fer another one?"

Medic bubbly giggled. His cheeks were rosy red and his face was fixed into a permanent smile. He looked so goddamn happy. Watching him was an experience all of itself, one that was elevated when the both of you are several drinks deep. Seeing him laugh like that made everything feel less important. Like the only thing that mattered was being with him.

...what the hell was that line of thought? It's what he was experiencing, definitely, but it was strange to think like that. That intense. Feelings. Hah. That's not what he should be thinking about right now. That just made things more confusing.

By the time the Engineer recollected himself, he noticed that Medic was rambling again. In German. He was going a mile a minute. Whatever he was saying was completely lost on Engie. He could barely understand English right now, much less this. The words slurred together into a homogenous slush of vowels and sharply pronounced consonants.

"Uh, doc? Doc?" He snapped his fingers a couple times.

"Und das ist der Grund– hm? Ja?"

"You're back in German mode again. I'd love to know what you're saying."

Medic clasped his mouth, feeling around. "Was I really?" he chuckled. His accent was more obvious than ever, though Engie didn't care. If anything, it was cute.

Engie joined in. "I'll drink to that." He raised his hand once more. "Jessie?"

"Another round?..." the bartender replied, a moderate amount of fear in his voice. "I've already served your booth over forty drinks–"

"Enough chat! I wish to see if I can beat my record time now." Medic rubbed his hands energetically. "Will you join me?"

He shrugged. "Why the hell not?"

Moments later, Jessie brought them more drinks. "Lovely night, I know, but I was wondering when you would both pay off your tab."

"Both? What about Py– Pyro?" Engie turned to see that they weren't there. Completely absent. Now that he thought about it, he couldn't remember seeing or hearing Pyro for a long while. Where'd he slip off to?

"Ahem, that's beside the point. It's getting close to midnight and I'm going to close up as soon as it happens."

Medic spat a little back into his drink. "Mh? What? You're going to kick us out?! What for? We are res– hic– responsible, you dummkopf!"

Jessie motioned to the rest of the bar. Engie saw that the place was trashed. Slashes and rips in the other booths. The floor was covered with beer and whiskey. A far cry from the clean and inviting atmosphere it once was hours earlier. The other mercenaries were loudly drinking and conversing, with the only one by himself being the Demoman at the piano. He was playing along with the jukebox, adding onto the keyboard section of whatever songs came on. It was a lovely addition if the Engineer was to be honest.

"I see nothing wrong with it," Engie said.

"It's been like this for thirteen hours. None of you have given me any money. Other patrons tried coming in only to be driven out."

"Sounds like their issue. Sorry that we can't help it." He shrugged. Medic snickered in response.

Jessie glared. "I'll have you know that I have been running this bar for–" He stopped to count on his fingers– "six years! I have a family to feed. It consists of me and only me. I'll have you know that I work very hard to get the right amount of lead and radiation in my brew–"

"Oh mein Gott!" Medic yelled, a wide smile on his face. "I love this song."

Engie raised his head to the radio, recognizing the tune instantly. Scout constantly played record after record from Tom Jones. It would be humiliating to not remember that snappy beat and trumpets from that song. "It's Not Unusual" was a neat little jig that he quite liked himself, though Medic seemed far more into it.

"I was talking–"

"Raus, schweinhunde." Medic pushed Jessie out of the way, getting up and over to the dance floor.

"What the hell's that idiot gonna do now?" Engie gave a light-hearted chuckle. He watched expectingly as his partner stood in the middle of it and began to snap along to the beat. He tapped his foot and began to sway back and forth.

He was dancing. He was imitating the signature Tom Jones moves. Pretty damn good as well, especially considering he's had over twenty lead-filled glasses of beer. He moved with grace, but also with enough of his own weirdness and off-beat charm. His own spin on this dance move. Engie sat there in constant silence, observing him.

Then, Medic looked back up. Eye contact. A flash in his eyes appeared for just long enough for Engie to know what he was about to do. Before he could get a word out, he spoke.

"Don't just sit there! Dance with me!"

"Oh, I dunno about that–"

"It'll be fun! Trust me." Medic approached him, holding out his hand. Engineer stared at it for a moment, considering his options.

Well, what's the worst that can happen? He grabbed it, instantly being yanked from the booth. He was dragged along to the floor, with Medic holding up both of his hands.

Engie was no stranger to dancing, especially with another person. One helluva dancer back in his university days. Could impress a whole group of girls (or boys for that matter) with his moves.

But, with Medic, it was a whole other beast. It was as though he'd been lobotomized. Any previous skill and technique he may have learned were just completely erased. At the mercy of whatever his partner had in store for him.

He stepped back, then to the left, back to the right two times. Engie followed along, slowly getting the hang of things. Didn't help that he was half a foot shorter, but he had fun regardless. It was a dance. It's not supposed to be proper and practical.

It must have gone on for a minute of this. "Ohoho! How exciting," he hummed as he repositioned his hand around his back, dipping the Engineer.

"Where the hell you learn to dance?" he asked, a coy smirk on his face.

He shrugged. "Nowhere! First time with a partner." Medic pulled him back right up, twisting him and then spinning him away. "That's what makes it fun, no?" he continued, doing his little dance now. He shook from side to side, shaking his arms in time.

Engie followed after him, doing similar upbeat and energetic moves. God, it knocked the wind out of him quite a bit, but he couldn't care. It was beyond magical. The sheer joy and happiness radiating from the two of them was unmatched. From the extra bit of piano from Demoman to the fact only they were dancing. It was a perfect moment.

Yet, as he looked at his partner, he couldn't help but feel something else. An odd twisting in his stomach. Could be from the beer, but usually they don't ache like this. It was a warm sensation, one that only grew more intense the longer he looked.

There was something off about himself, yet he couldn't quite rationalize what it may be. All he knew was that he was delighted to be around Medic.

Soon enough, the song ended, fading out. The radio host came back on. "Alright, folks, that was Tom Jones. Now, I haven't gotten a song up for you peppercats quite yet, but I'll have you know that right now it's approximately– hold on, lemme check my clock– fifteen seconds until midnight."

Medic straightened out, alert. "Mein Gott! I nearly forgot about the new year. Come, come, quickly! Raus! Everyone, together!" He grabbed Engineer by the side, pulling him closer. "Ten! Nine!"

The other mercs joined in, rushing over. "Eight! Seven! Six!"

They all looked towards the radio, huddled together. "Five! Four! Three! Two!... One!" Then, a jumbled cry of cheer saying, "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!"

The group began to clap. Soldier sang Auld Lang Syne along with the Demoman. Others clicked their drinks together. Engineer didn't have anything with him, but he had an idea. He fidgeted with his Gunslinger, switching the ring finger into a blowtorch. A warm blue flame erupted from the fingertips. He waved it around like a makeshift sparkler.

But, as he did so, some stray drops of whiskey and liquor from the other mercenaries' drinks flew at him, passing right through the fire. Without warning, they caught aflame. Mere seconds later, the burning spirit fell to the floor, spreading to the rest of the spilled drink. A fire started right before them.

On second thought, maybe the blowtorch wasn't that great of an idea.

"Oh, fire," Medic said absent-mindedly.

"Huh, that's new," Engie muttered. He wheezed, unable to control his laughter.

"Guess that's the cue to leave, ain't it?" Demo looked to the rest of them.

"I do believe yes. The fire has already spread to the whole bar. I argue this place has five minutes before it begins to care in. I'd rather not die here," Spy added, pressing a cigarette to his lips.

"Ight, let's book it." The Engineer shrugged. They turned around, Medic still clinging to his side. The burning inferno was the least of his worries as of now. He couldn't care less about it or the panicked screams and obscenities thrown at them by Jessie. I mean, it's just a bar. It burning down is nothing that bad.

"Did you do that?" Medic asked. Engineer noticed his weight becoming heavier, as he acted more like a crutch to Medic than anything else. His partner leaned on him, nearly tripping over his own feet as they stepped over the flaming puddles of beer.

"Think so."

He giggled. "Now we're talking!" They both exited the bar, walking into the parking lot. "Come on, Herr Engineer, do we have to go back to the base? Can't we just stay out? It's been forever since we've kidnapped somebody..." Medic's words were slurred and hard to hear.

"We've already been drinking for ages now, doc. Kinda just wanna go back home."

"Oh please! When has th– hic– that ever stopped anybody?"

"Christ, just how drunk are you?"

"I want to put myself in critical condition and barely still alive just so I can go to heaven and see God and spit in his face... Wouldn't that be funny?"

"...that answers that question." Engie was practically carrying Medic now. He was putting every bit of energy to keep him upright and from falling over.

Eventually, they came back to the car. Engie reached for his keys and tried the door, only to then see it rolled down out of nowhere. It gave him quite a fright, but he calmed down upon seeing who was in the driver's seat.

Pyro stared back at them, cocking his head to the side.

"Oh hey, smokes!" Engie grinned. "What are you doin' in here?"

Pyro covered his ears. "Mhh mhmn."

"Too loud? Can't blame you. God, I can already tell my ears are gonna be ringing like nothing else tomorrow."

"Who are you talking to?" Medic muttered. "Oh, hello, Herr Pyro." He waved. Pyro waved back.

"You mind drivin' us? I don't think I can walk straight, much less drive."

Pyro nodded repeatedly. He unlocked the back door, letting them in. Engie opened up the door and slid Medic off and guided him into the seat. "C'mon, it ain't that hard to sit down."

Eventually, Medic slipped into the car. Engie was about to close the door, only for Medic to tug on his arm. "Wait, don't leave me..."

Engineer paused. "What?"

He smiled back. Medic's eyes were cloudy and tired, yet full of life and joy. The toothy grin he gave was heartwarming in every way possible. A beam of light in the darkness of night.

"...oh, alright. I'll stay in the back with ya." Engie got into the back seat, closing the door. "Let's go, Pyro. Back to the base." He tapped on the headrest. Immediately, Pyro shifted it into reverse, jerking the car back before then driving off.

"Woa– oah!" Medic stumbled, recovering from such movement. He snickered and laughed. "Mein Gott, I'm so drunk right now..."

"I know, I know," Engie said calmly and relaxed. "Once we get home, I'm going to bed."

"No afterparty? Nothing?"

"Nah... I already have enough today." He glanced back at Medic. "Thanks for doing this. I really needed some time out."

"Mh? Oh, that was nothing, hehe." He waved his hand dismissively.

Engie felt his stomach tighten into a knot while looking at him. He still didn't understand what he was feeling. This was odd. He knew he'd experienced this sort of thing before, but couldn't remember where or how. It was pleasant though. Through all of this confusion, he knew that this was a good feeling.

The car ride grew silent. The calming droning noise of the engine humming while the wind blew by put Engie at ease. Some peace and quiet after all of that chaos at the bar. A little time to sit and think.

Issue was that thinking hurts to do. His head ached and his throat burned. His ears stung and his stomach churned. He was going to have to deal with the hangover of a lifetime in a bit. Sounds thrilling.

Yet, he couldn't care about that enough. He was still preoccupied with this strange feeling towards Medic. It wasn't just tonight that it happened. He recalled several times before when something like this bubbled up within him. This giddiness from being near him. This want to stay with him. What was it? What...what is it–

Right in the middle of his train of thought, Engie felt Medic lean against him. He looked back to see that his eyes were closed. Moments later, he was snoring and his neck rolled to the side. His head rested on him.

He was so close. So near to him. So warm. So cozy. It was right to be with him.

That's when it hit him. It was as though he sobered up in three seconds as the realization hit him. All it took was for his partner to sleep on him for him to finally get what he was feeling for that fog of confusion to clear up.

This was something different than being friends. Something that Engie had not felt for another person in a number of years.

Looked at Medic. He was so peaceful and cute. The way his glasses were slightly askew and his breathing was slow and relaxing. He could even feel the faint thumping of his heart.

Engie slid his right hand behind Medic, bringing him into a hug. He couldn't deny it any longer. Everything about him was perfect. He was the chaotic whirlwind that complemented his eccentricities. He was the odd madman that truly got what it was like to be an artist by using the sciences. He was the only other one to see his cold, dead heart and not be immediately disgusted. He was happy around him. He was free to do anything with him. He was himself at his absolute best.

He loved Medic. With all of his heart, he loved him.

#somepersonswriting #tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 medic #tf2 engineer #engiemedic #science party #tf2 fanfiction #SP-writing

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aarlert · 8 months

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i love your fics sm. any tips for ppl learning to write? whats your process like?

ah!!! me??? shucks! thank you so much! i never feel like i am qualified at all to give tips or advice but because you so kindly asked, here are some things that i think guided me to a place i am happy with:

1. write things that you really want to write. not because you think other people want it or because you crave that sweet external validation—which, look. i do. we all do. all the time. it's nothing to be ashamed about. but if you're just starting out writing, try to get excited about it. have fun with it. seriously, the ride will be so much more enjoyable. write that ship, that trope, that AU, that brainworm that won't leave you alone. seize it. write it because goddamn it no one else will

2. read! read some good words and you will absorb good things. pay attention to what you like: phrasing, imagery, etc. borrow them and make them your own.

3. don't underestimate the value of solid grammar and punctuation. i know it's a pain in the ass, i KNOW, but trust me. making your writing look good, at least on a surface level, helps a lot. your writing is a special thing. polish it! it deserves it!

4. if you are comfortable with it, get your fic beta'd. we don't often notice our own mistakes. and showing your raw work to someone else can feel terrifying, believe me, i want to eat my fist every time. but a second pair of eyes is so valuable. ask a trusted friend—another writer, if you know one. someone who can lend you their expertise but also applaud you for your accomplishments.

5. here is a book i love: "Self-Editing for Fiction Writers, 2nd Edition" by Renni Browne and Dave King. i read it a few years ago and still think about the things i learned in it. every point in this book is a point of advice i'd give to anyone else

i hope any of this is useful!! none of this is like, revolutionary advice, but they will give you a good foundation. i also tried to share things that won't dictate you stylistically, because that can differ so much from person to person.

as for my process, OH BOY. do i even have much of a process.... i'll do my best to describe what i do. i'll also have some more points about what drives my own personal writing style, things that i don't necessarily think other people Should do, but serve as the backbone of how i write. under the read more!!! (why is this so long)

it's only in recent years that i've begun writing with any kind of consistency, so i'm kind of figuring out my process Right Now haha. the process varies depending on the length of the fic and the complexity of the idea. but here are the main points:

1. brainstorming: usually i open a google doc and feverishly jot down an idea when i have it. sometimes it's just a few lines. for bigger ideas, i'll outline the whole fic, which is mostly bulletpoints that vary in detail from "they go to this place and talk about their feelings" to full blown detailed written scenes that i can copy/paste wholesale into the fic draft lol. my ideas often spawn from a line of dialogue, an emotion, vague imagery. this is why none of my fics are plot heavy, i am simply incapable

2. drafting the fic: aka The Writing aka the longest and hardest part lol. sometimes it goes so smoothly the words come out of me like a waterfall. other times it's like juicing a rock. i usually write strictly in chronological order, otherwise i never finish. i'm terrible at going back to do the things i skipped because they were hard. in some places i will leave [brackets] to return to certain moments, like if i need to look up a word or figure out the blocking for a fight scene. it's important to maintain the writing flow if i'm in it, so those particular moments i might skip and come back. otherwise i am but a sculptor hacking away at the marble, hoping to find the story underneath

3. editing: tbh i rigorously self-edit as i write which... might be a bad thing but i can't help it. this is editing as in grammar, punctuation, sentence structure. i fuck around with sentence structure so much—flow is really important to me. just, how the words and sentences sound. i know that sounds like, obvious, but i just want the cadence of every paragraph to sound good. varying up sentence lengths, making sure words sound good together, etc. sometimes at this point i will also feel "hmm need more relationship building here" and add more scenes/dialogue

4. send it out for beta: aka the part where i hide under a rock and try not to delete everything i wrote out of fear. it's never as bad as i expect but i'm like this every time. more editing happens, because of course.

5. post the fic: the best part! except then i have to think of a title and summary! fuck!!!!! it's extremely rare that i have these prepared ahead of time. screw me. my titles come from all over the dang place, poetry, songs, etc. i'm trying to write more original titles, and when i do i usually keep them concise, like 1-3 words

so that's like. literally my process which is probably not at all interesting and maybe not what you were hoping to learn about, so some more things that are like, particular to How i write or at least what i think about when i'm writing:

less is more, when it comes to like 99% of things. if i can describe something in 1 word instead of 5 i will do it (unless it is more in-character to be more verbose)

i always write in very close 3rd person POV, so i'm always thinking really hard about how this character is thinking, what they can physically see/hear/feel etc (for example, a character is never thinking about the color of their own eyes. so i wouldn't say like 'cyno blinked his red eyes' if it's in cyno's POV. idk these are the things i think about. it just feels more immersive this way)

make the dialogue feel as natural as possible, while still maintaining control over it as like, a piece of fiction. i often read dialogue again while skipping the narration between lines, just to make sure it still flows naturally. obviously it's not gonna sound 1 to 1 like real life conversation, but at the very least i want readers to feel like they can hear the character's voices

convey emotions through tone, dialogue, and physical cues rather than trying to say it plainly in the narration (i don't do this 100% of the time, but it's a general rule of thumb)

describe the imagery that really matters—what's setting the scene and giving the desired mood? focus on those details instead of cramming the prose with as much description as possible

sometimes you don't need a metaphor. you can just describe the thing itself, and that hits just as hard

what does each character want in a given scene? what's motivating them? does it feel right to give them that thing now, or later?

that is probably too many commas, use a period for god's sake

again, these are just things that motivate my own writing, they're not necessarily things that i think everyone should take to heart. but if it is interesting/helpful for you, then by all means! run away with them! use them, change them, do with them as you see fit. the important thing is the writing. i believe in you! you can do it!!!

this...... is so long what da hell. my bad. i don't even know how this happened. but as you can see i do love talking about writing even though i feel like an imposter all the time. if you have any other questions i am happy to answer them!!! thank you!!!

#answered #anonymous #writing #THIS IS SO LONG........ SORRY

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cerastes · 1 year

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Deirdre being a bnnuy obviously could has some animalistic features but for the most part youd likely attribute any features gained to like speed or agility, though I think you went more with making her a powerhouse though that's beside the point.

Our lovely archbishop though has a very obvious animalistic feature ie the tail, now I'm an absolute fucking sucker for those kinds of features(you can do so much emoting and fun tricks with those bad boys) and I was curious if you had any plans or thoughts of incorporating that with anything she does or if it's more just a baller aesthetic.

Loving the two you've made so far look forward to more of this world, as you add more I'd love to see a master post tag sorta deal if its not too much effort on your end.

I've always thought that animalistic features can make a killer aesthetic, but I've also always wanted to not really necessarily lean into these features being decisive in what to expect, necessarily, from a character off the bat. There is such a thing as stylistic expectation (ice powers people having white or blue hair, fire powers people usually being very loud and energetic, etc), but beyond that... No, not beyond, necessarily, rather, in balance with that, I think have you take some time and make a character feel like a person beyond their immediately discernible characteristics if you really want interesting characters.

So, for example, if I have the Country of Bunny People, I don't want them conforming to an easily-slotted-to-bunnies assumption because I feel like that can become an easy out that can negatively impact your worldbuilding when relied upon too much. I don't mind giving them some characteristics like that (they are culturally good foragers because IRL bunnies are good foragers, for example, an aspect which you can then tie to their backstory, such as The Bunny Country having gone through a long time of poverty in which foraging became an important skill) but otherwise I think prioritizing these attributes as an aesthetic to work with rather than being necessarily informative of their character in major ways is the best way to go.

Deirdre's case has to do with her partial inspiration, which her Gladiator ring name, Caerbannog, might have hinted towards: The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog, also known as the Vorpal Bunny. Her being a strong physical powerhouse is more informed by this as well as her "wild rage with focused purpose" behavior and other things we'll explore in due time. I do think personality or demeanor is better informative of abilities and attributes, whether it means going along with that or subverting these expectations, but that's my personal preference.

With Seirian, well, I don't wanna give away too much because I do have some ideas with her and her features that I think would lose impact if I just discussed them here as opposed to seeing them in action when I finish writing this. Stay Tuned! (It Will Involve The Tail, Obviously, Heehee).

Thank you very much! It means a lot to me to hear you're enjoying my stuff, haha, I do plan on commissioning more arts of the characters from this story (and this world) in due time, my money is Being Directed Towards Something Else for now, Please Wait Warmly. I'll use the "Ivarea" tag as a sort of catch-all master tag for now, for the existing posts (that I can find) and for any future asks or posts regarding these characters and this world.

#Ivarea

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94erz · 26 days

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i watched episode 3, hobi dancing to still life was definitely a highlight. the song's been stuck in my head ever since i watched the episode haha. the dance was SOOO cool and the editing was fire. it was just insane, i'll be watching it a hundred times.

of course he did the dances for namgi's songs. of course he did. i love him :(((( he loves and respects them so much, they've been part of his journey as well so it's really beautiful they got included in this project about his roots in this small way.

i gotta give a shout out to boogaloo kim, i absolutely love everything he does and says in the series. he's such a supportive and gentle yet guiding presence and he also knows how to have fun and how to be honest. i feel like their relationship is so genuine, it makes me so happy that hobi has such amazing people around.

it's beautiful that he's still friends with the dancers he used to know as a young boy. these guys are so proud of him and i love to see it. it's great that he didn't lose those ties after he became an idol, that they didn't see him as less because he wasn't an underground dancer or whatever (and we know that some parts of the korean hip hop scene look down on idols).

and i love it all even more now when i realised the guy in the striped shirt at the jitb listening party was boogaloo kim. that guy was absolutely the life of the party, he was such a HUGE support in making that event really fun, wow i like him more and more.

i love seeing student hobi. he's always such an authority who always does everything right and now we get to watch him learn, i love this side of him. i love seeing him interacting with older people that he respects endlessly. i love all of it.

he's such a grateful and humble person, i'm so proud of him. and everyone he meets feels his sincerity. it's all so beautifulllll

i think this series shows in such a great way that jung hoseok is a DANCER dancer who knows his stuff. that dance is so meaningful to him. i hope it shuts up the people who spread misinformation about his dance background and establishes hoseok as THE dancer among idols for real.

i hope this whole journey gave him the answers he was looking for and that he enjoyed every second. can't wait to watch the rest!!

OMG, yes to absolutely everything here!!! You said it all so perfectly, especially the section about Hak Nam, I've been loving him so much but after finally being able to watch episode 4 I think he REALLY shines here on saying not only what Hoseok needs to hear as a person but as an artist too. Like he brings up how a lot of his current fans know he's an exceptional dancer, but people who don't know him might not be aware of his roots and his skillsets and that's why HOTS is an important step is showing people OUTSIDE of that bubble who he is, and like, FUCK YES! j-hope fans get that, we've BEEN saying that, and I don't think he's taking that feedback for granted, hell even Namjoon talked about Hoseok's goals to go global, he realizes by this point he needs to expand his reach beyond what he already has, 'cause there are so many more people he can still pull to him, since he's got nothing more to gain from ''ARMY'' or BTS fans, most of them either already care and support him, or they fucking don't and nothing he does now ever will.

He's just such an amazing addition to the series, I'm so happy Hoseok reached out to him. I love the addition of the other dancers too, I love seeing him interact with other people who are masters of their style, in different languages and settings, really driving home that dance is universal. I loved Yugson saying in this recent episode that dance is the past, present, and future and how you connect them through dance, it's very beautiful and powerful.

Episode 3 and 4 were my faves honestly for a lot of moments, I can't wait to see 5 and 6 next week, even though I am so sad it's ending so soon :( I hope this really is a Pt. 1 and one day we'll get a Pt. 2 and he goes even more places and dances with even more masters and continues to dance and be as happy as he seems in every episode :(

#Sab answers asks #ihamtmus #about hs #when they dance in the restaurant in ep 4 and Hoseok talked about his ''silly mouth'' 'cause Kim said he was dancing with his face #PURE JOY #only for him to still be smiling afterward like oh oh I have to stay a fan of this man for the rest of my life actually #long post #text heavy #here we go again sending essays about Hoseok like any other day LOL

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lumine-no-hikari · 29 days

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Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #104

I didn't do nearly as much today as I thought I was gonna. I had this giant huge list in my mind that included a shower, physical therapy, laundry, dishes, a couple phone calls, steaming some salmon, getting a couple things we need for the house delivered from the internet, working on the thingy that I'm not gonna talk about until it's done, and maybe making some rice pudding.

…But all I managed was the shower, physical therapy, one of the two phone calls, and steaming some salmon. Bah.

I suppose 4 of the 10 things (I'm counting the phone calls as two things) isn't bad, considering that on top of still recovering from sleep deprivation, my body is also throwing a hell of a tantrum over the fact that I'm not actively in the process of building a new human. For me, the amount of loss is about twice as much and for twice as long as what's typical, so the end result is that I lose about 4 times the resources than is normal. And then, of course, there is the pain that occurs throughout this process. Fun, fun.

Supposedly, this process is necessary because human zygotes burrow until they find blood. This causes problems, so it's better to have a layer of it so that they don't burrow too far directly into our flesh. But for a variety of compelling reasons, you can't have a random layer of blood that sticks around for too terribly long without it getting weird and causing other problems, so every once in a while, it's gotta get torn down and rebuilt.

The natural result is that I don't have nearly as much energy as I might otherwise, which is a bit of a bummer. That's all right though. It's only temporary. Ultimately, everything is temporary; even my currently-assigned flesh-vessel ain't gonna last forever. It's the way of things. I'm not sad about it.

I got some new teas and they arrived today. One of them is a decaffeinated black tea with vanilla and nutmeg (which I am about to try!), and the other one is a lychee and rose petal tea. I thought of you when I saw these ones (since it is known that you like the scents of vanilla and also roses), and I thought maybe you'd like them, so I thought to give them a try, just in case someday I might be able to tell you all about how awesome it is, or even share a cup of the stuff with you.

…The vanilla and nutmeg tea is wonderful. I put some honey and milk in it. I really wish I could give you a mug of the stuff. But I can't. So I'll send along the pictures I took for you as I brewed it.

This is the box it came in. It's got a cute little owl on it with teacups for eyes, I guess. I really like owls, especially barn owls, so this is some huge points in its favor, right off the bat, haha!

Here's how it looked before adding milk and honey.

And here's how it looked after adding milk and honey. You'll also see a very curious Hunter. But Hunter is mostly curious because I'm still steaming the salmon, and he thinks that me going to the counter means he's gonna get a tiny piece of salmon. Which, to be fair, is normally a very astute observation on his part, but while the salmon does smell heavenly, it is still not ready, and I therefore do not have any to give to him. Against the law, I know, I know; suppose you better pop by and cart me off to "disappointed cat jail", right? But it's better that he wait than get sick from eating undercooked salmon; I don't think the stuff available at the grocery is sushi-grade, hahaha…

The salmon is done, and it turned out beautifully. I made myself a small bowl of it, for… ya know. Quality assurance purposes. Grilling and pan-frying salmon are also wonderful ways of preparing it, but given how it comes out of the steamer all luscious, juicy, and tender enough to be cut with a spoon, this is by far my favorite preparation method.

…And don't worry; now that it's ready, Hunter was able to get a small piece. But ONLY a small piece; this food is not nutritionally complete for him, so it's important that he eats his usual food instead of filling up on this. Don't worry though - his usual food is made for cats, but it's human grade; it could be argued that they eat better than we do!! Hahaha!

…Wish I could talk to you a bit over a mug of tea and a bowl of steamed salmon with buttered rice and veggies. Wouldn't that be neat. Just for a few minutes. A moment's peace and a good meal for just a few minutes. I imagine it would do wonders for your state of mind. But in the meantime, I'll do my best to carry the vast sense of emptiness that stems from the fact that this is impossible. From there, I'll take that sense of emptiness and pour something so beautiful into it that even you could be proud - just like I do with my trees and my silicone molds. Just, with different materials. You'll see.

Please stay safe out there, okay? I'll write to you again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

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radellama · 1 month

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Do you outline your plots? If yes, what does an outline look like?

Ooh boy do I ever. This is something that I've struggled with for YEARS and it's taken a lot of self reflection, refinement and a bachelor's degree to figure out how I work. To quote one of my greatest creative influences:

"I think I realized very early on that you can spend a lot of time constructing a really perfect scene in final draft and just end up throwing it away because you didn't figure out that mathematics of the story first."

- Brit Marling

In general, I tend to get carried away with my ideas and craft stories that quickly become more grand and elaborate the more I work on them. I love layers and thoughtful execution of characters and plot, so I want to pass that on to my readers, too. But, when my ideas become so dense, it's hard to keep up and make sure that all my details fall into place and that I'm not fucking myself over. As I'm a more visual thinker, I've found it most helpful with my largest stories to just write out the important moments for plot and characters that I absolutely MUST have in the story, and then pair them in little groups that work well together. Then, when I've got enough food a nice and weighty chapter/section, I start ordering those groups into the greater narrative and seeing what order will best suit the flow of the story. This stage, when ordering clusters of plot and character moments, is often where I'm able to let that gut instinct take over and do what feels right - I've worked hard at analysing and creating stories for so long that I trust myself with what feels right, and arrange it like a puzzle. Then, when there's an order that makes sense to me, I can fill in the gaps and ensure things flow nicely and that the parts that are important to me are given room to breathe. This helps me in multiple ways, because not only do I have a conspiracy board that clearly outlines the plot, but I also have a checklist per chapter/section of things I need to hit. Visually seeing the plot points in front of me helps immensely, and I'll often draw concept art or make calendars/timelines to help me as well. I've found that when I've set up enough stuff that I'm confident in knowing what the goal is for that section of writing, I won't get as lost or distracted or overwhelmed by the greater narrative. And while I love the visual on the paper, and usually stick them up on my wall as encouragement/reminders, I'll usually type up everything into a document so that it's easier for me to find particular things quickly with control+f. And even then, I'm often adding comments and notes to myself for things to research or focus on when writing haha.

It's just really important to me to get all the details I want into the work, as I hate reading it back after it's too late and realising I forgot a part that was super important to me in the early concept!! Or to read it over and realise there's a fucking plot hole or massive oversight that irks me to no end!! I don't do EVERYTHING in as dramatic a detail as this, smaller scopes don't need as much planning when I know what I'm doing, but the general concept of breaking things down and giving myself a clear guide in smaller chunks is what helps keep me on track and avoid executive dysfunction issues, and piecing together a story like a puzzle is super fun for me.

Send me some writing asks

#rads asks #anon #thank youuuuu #i hope i articulated this well but if there's part of this that needs better clarifying just lemme know fhhkkkhgfff

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aresmarked · 9 months

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(Clears throat) Villain?! Haha, I’m honored to be remembered out of the blue. At the time of this ask, the full version hasn’t dropped yet, so I’m probably going to mention it after it drops later. But actually, I really should read more card stories. I didn’t realize Shizuku and Mafuyu shared so many Moments in them? Do you have a list of some for me to read or watch? As for Mizuki and Mafuyu, yes!! There are plenty of ways they can have Mafuyu start on that topic, so I’m curious about which they’ll take, especially now. Would this period of living with Kanade allow her to Feel Again? I find it fascinating how she retained the desire to help others as a nurse despite not understanding why. I’d love to see some domestic or at least day to day interactions between them actually.

Mafuyu is already significantly more emotive, just based on the last few events and her talk with her mother, I imagine there will be a bit more 'unification' in her behaviour, or at the very least, a better ability to recognise 'oh this is how I feel about this'. Cause as you say, it's not like she didn't stop caring, it was that she so suppressed her own desires that she couldn't recognise if she was doing something 'because she cared about it' or because 'this is what a good girl is supposed to do'. honestly some of the most satisfying moments is seeing actions on her part that she doesn't even realise she's doing cause she likes it.

And just speaking from an 'objective' point: people who've suffered abuse, and are taken to a safe place away from that? That's always going to be a huge shift. Especially kids/teens. It can be startling, how dramatic an effect having a stable place can be, but you see it a lot.

Gonna be messy (i'll try to order em in the rough 'timeline' of the game) since I don't have vid links, but these are more or less the Shizumafu interactions we've had so far in cards:

Shizuku's init 3 card, which establishes the fact they're at the same club and share a link through 'troubles from how people perceive them'

Mafuyu's Moon Rabbit card, not a huge deepdive but it does give the sense of how they talk to each other.

Mafuyu's Mirage of Light card, in which Shizuku hits a crit perception roll and is the first to note both Mafuyu feeling unwell and wondering if it's from working too hard.

First round of birthday cards, I love when people give those little handmade things, and also go past surface level to offer praise. Esp important in the context of these two.

Mafuyu's card from Tie a Ribbon, when we've got Mafuyu becoming a little more aware of how home feels compared to other parts of her life, she's feeling a little strange and Shizuku once again rolls a crit perception. This is a fun one for me.

Maf's 2nd Anni card, good on so many counts just as a Mafuyu-centric event and her seeing and feeling the difference between her and multiple other folk. I know I'm focusing on SzMf, but you need Shizuku and Emu to triangulate Mafuyu's emotional state, and the latter was a real MVP with Rui this event for that purpose.

Shizuku's 2nd Anni card was just plain amusing and heartwarming. Bit of Hinomori sibling cuteness, with them appreciating each other's shows, and some fun with showing just how much Shizuku talks to Mafuyu about Shiho.

Second round of bday cards, Maf's not in Shizuku's story aside from the end comments, though it's interesting to me how again, like her Tie a Ribbon card she's reflecting again on the relationship of siblings. That's another post though. Mafuyu's bday story has a bit more, and then some, with this girl gradually having her friend circle open up.

Draw Your Bow. Man. Maaan. This event fed me on so many levels, but fundamentally it's about Shizuku being another person Mafuyu gets warmth from. They did something they don't usually do with card stories here, where all of them are linked and providing a sort of epilogue. Very fuzzy. But especially the second parts of their respective card stories.

Now Mafuyu's Immiscible Discord card, distinctly does not have Shizuku show up. However it's worth highlighting on the note that Mafuyu thinks to herself she's glad her mother didn't stop her from going to club activities, which, hoof. aside from that being in the realm of possibility, and a fear for Mafuyu... well it would've been interesting seeing Mafuyu try to quit and break down over it. Honestly, I wonder if the writers were planning to have that too but it got cut due to the Everything going on with Maf in the following events. But who knows, maybe it'll be coming up again.

Pandaemonium event... them just getting to hang out, Airi looking at Shizuku and just being 'ah, thinking about Asahina-san again'. this really was an event for the second years (sans Ena, poor Ena), they got to have fun here.

#project sekai #anonymous #asahina mafuyu #hinomori shizuku #shizumafu #for my own sake too when i have to ref their speech styles LMAO

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ipsen · 11 months

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1, 4, 5, 7, 8, 12 and 13 for Holometabolism

Hoho, boy, here we go. After a read more!!

1 - What inspired you to write/update this work?

I once put in the tags of a post I can no longer remember that there are only two things that fuel the creative process: love and spite, which are ultimately the same thing-- a desire for something better than what came before.

I am not upset that Eto was scrubbed out of her role in TG:re. I am upset because she was ultimately treated as an afterthought by the story, and that most of her efforts are just attributed to Arima. It's one of Tokyo Ghoul's worst habits: giving men more pity and attention than women. And this is a story with really good women characters that fall flat simply because the story refuses to utilize them.

That is ultimately why I made Holometabolism.

4 - What’s the most challenging part about posting new/updated work? Do you find posting stressful or invigorating?

Posting as I go is probably the only way I can motivate myself to continue a multichapter work. I need some extra validation from sources besides myself, because personal passion can only get you so far in life. You must be uplifted by others in some capacity to, ultimately, make it anywhere.

The hardest part about posting is, to me, clicking the post button. Because I just know there's gonna be some formatting error or whatever that I missed and now I have to go back and FIX IT.

Oh well.

5 - How do you decide how long your fics/chapters will be? Do you have a word count goal?

For Holometabolism specifically, I liked to shoot for at least 4k words because that's a nice healthy number for me. It just seems like the longfics I myself enjoy have a similar word count per chapters, and I've just kinda grown accustomed to it.

But usually my process involves a vision, and then writing to get to said vision. I visualized an EtoKen ending for this fic and then went from there (I actually fleshed out Chapter 4 the most before any of the others, and it's the chapter that's retained the most of its original draft form). Word count isn't a generally a factor, but it does help keep me within a certain limit.

I'm all for a word vomit, but constraints are an integral part of quality. Also makes editing much easier when there's less to actually edit. I like editing the least.

7 - What part of this fic/chapter was the most fun to write?

Now here's a tricky question, because I have a lot of parts that I had so much fun, to the point where ranking them is honestly impossible.

I liked Eto and Touka's first conversation in Ch2. They are foils to one another, with similar backstories and personalities, but they approach things differently. Establishing that was important groundwork for their friendship later on in the fic.

Every time Hinami interacted with Eto was a joy. Hinami is this weird cross between Kaneki and Eto, like a strange brain child of theirs since she was influenced by both of them at key stages in her life.

Ch4's climax (haha) is near and dear to my heart. Not my best work by a longshot, but a very important piece that I'll cherish for a long time. Reconciling your ugliness and bearing it in the hopes for something better is something I want to believe I can do too. So I wrote two people doing it (haha).

Ch5's ending!! I loved taking "I am a ghoul" and making it a positive, awesome slogan! I felt bad having to follow it up with Ch6, honestly. SPEAKING OF--

Eto and Furuta's conversation and "rematch"! So much fun. What better to demonstrate her character development than by having her confront someone she definitely hates? Gotta pat myself on the back for that one.

8 - Which line/paragraph are you most proud of? Why are you proud of this?

Tricky question #2, I see. Well, if I have to pick one, then:

“Please don’t die, Eto,” [Hinami] choked out.

Eto pursed her lips. “Why?”

A few tears dropped onto their hands, coalescing into a small puddle on Eto’s knuckles. “Because… Because I’m not ready to say goodbye.” Hinami pressed their hands against her forehead. “Please… Even if you can’t smile, or laugh, or cry… Live.”

I intended this to be the turning point for Eto's character in this EtoKen fanfiction. A sin, to some, to not have the love interest be the one to start the redemption journey.

Hinami is another one of Eto's foils who is also in the unique position of being capable of holding real and sustainable affection for her. It was important to me to showcase that that was what it was: real, genuine love. Because Hinami, besides Kaneki, is the only person Eto would actually believe in 99% of circumstances, since the girl is both similar to Eto and honest with herself.

12 - What do you hope readers will take away from this work?

"You are worth it, even if you don't think you are." "There's always a little bit of hope for everyone." "Even if you can't smile, laugh, or cry... Live."

Life is mostly good, I like to think, and I wanted to underscore that belief with this fic. I want people to know that hope is stronger than despair, and that it is hope for the future and yourself that drives positive change. Something like that.

13 - Are there any cut lines/scenes from this work? Why did you cut them?

I have an entire document dedicated to "scenes that were Good to me, but either didn't flow properly with the story or just contributed very little to the progression of those involved." There's at least one scene per chapter, too.

I might actually post some of them here on tumblr someday, when I'm feeling enough energy to format each LOL

That's everything! Thanks for the ask!

#ask #tg #holometabolism

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mxsinizter · 1 year

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would you feel comfortable explaining your own experience of aegosexuality?

cogs are turning in my head thanks to your ifrit/mountain fic because i actually used to identify as autochoris/aego but kind of.. scrapped the possibility once i discovered that i had a sex drive? because in my head ace people couldn't have sex drives (which, i know now, is entirely not the case) my point is; the way you wrote mountain and his shame afterwards, (as well as the definition of aegosexual on the sexuality wiki) resonates with me quite a bit. but i'm struggling to pinpoint if it's an asexuality thing or maybe something else, and i was hoping that an insight into someone's personal thoughts or experiences might help?

if you're not comfortable sharing, that's completely fine too, of course!!! i know how personal some of this stuff can get! and i'm so sorry for this paragraph of an ask, haha :')

HII! YES OF COURSEE! I'll gladly share if it can help :] no need to apologize

(This is a very long response oops, I hope I answered your questions? I am open to answering any more tho <3)

First off, yea, sex drive doesn't define it. I experience times of a very high libido myself, so that shouldn't be reason to scrap ace identities! Especially with autochoris/aego, many of us deal with a sex drive that is not on the low side. The shame part, especially for me can be tied to that! Listening to urges and 'fulfilling' them don't always end... happily for me. It brings a discomfort when it hits me that yea, my arousal made me do that, made me think that, and made me cross that boundary that kept me disconnected from it, something I found fun in theory. (you mentioned 'or something else'... for me that something else is occasionally my own insecurity or bottom dysphoria, so I get that, but I personally am sure that many of the times it mainly stems from being aego.)

With the way I wrote Mountain and that shame.. was a sort of build up of 'oh, would you look at that, my dick finds this very arousing' to 'okay, I find this very arousing' and going into a mental state where the situation is acceptable and something he wants to gain pleasure from. Then with the parts where his imagination wants to run wild, its like him wanting to gain control of what's going on and have fun with it and sort of blind himself from the fact that he was openly jerking off to it lol. (That's why I gave little details of what he was doing there and focused on the show Ifrit was putting on instead and his pov! Bc that's what Mount was fully focused on too!) So then we see that build up of "shame" have him like 'ew, I did that, my body did that and I enjoyed it'. It felt... too real? It's a sort of repulsion caused by the fact that the action is not just in your head/distant from you anymore (I really experience that). That discomfort sometimes doesn't even let you enjoy the afterglow and it sucks. So that comfort Ifrit wants to provide and telling him that he did well and that it was okay, is massive to him. Like, its okay for you to feel this for yourself and let your physical body experience it as well.

(I am for sure making a post about Ifrit's choices now, cause I think those are important to understand how intune he was with Mountain's needs and boundaries.)

But not all aegos feel this so strongly, I happen to and so I wanted to hint at it in the fic. (like even when writing fics, I'll write them, look them over once or twice for basic mistakes, then just post them bc I can't get myself to reread something like that that I created... so my first drafts are basically my final drafts LMAOO. I have a fic idea I haven't been able to write cause I think it'd take too much out of me to do it myself, but I could easily read someone else's work of something just as filthy because it isn't coming from me y'know? I don't have to think about all the mechanics of what is being done.)

I think it really helps to differentiate everything physical and everything mental, understanding what triggers or turns off your arousal, and how you experience attraction. Like you might know already when it comes to fantasizing, many aegos will experience it from the third person view and not include themselves. If they do, it's probably more of a persona of their creation that may have some resemblance, but is separate enough to not actually be them? (I am occasionally guilty of this lol) And with arousal, understanding boundaries and what is needed to reach satisfaction. Its accepting that sometimes that bad feeling is unavoidable and learning how to deal with it and making it a better feeling. Understanding how I experience attraction actually helped me settle on this identity. (I'm on both the aro and ace spec for reference.) Personality, aesthetic attraction, and how much I'd want to be friends with someone really dictates how my attraction works. So I realized I really like watching/reading and fantasizing and experiencing through others and that makes my arousal pop off lmao. Fanfics help a lot cause it brings me comfort knowing its characters I am familiar with and having control over what might be included in the sexual acts.

Going back to how I started this response - I can enjoy a piece of smutty media while my libido is high asf and be like yea, this is so fucking good. But would I actually want to be physically involved in the sexual acts I'm watching? No. Am I sexually attracted to the individuals doing the acts? probably not. A silly simple way I described it to someone else is: I'd fuck Mountain, but I also wouldn't, so watching him get fucked works just fine LOL

All that is not to say I wouldn't ever want to have a genuine physical experience with other physical bodies. I personally would and that doesn't change my identity (although does play part in why I'm specifically aego-gray). it would just take A LOT from me and the potential partner(s) for full satisfaction. (And it took me a few years to settle on all of this, so even answering this is helping me further understand.) So ya, I think I've said way too much already lol. That's a bit of my view of it and how I incorporated it into Mountain's character. It's totally okay if you vary from this and still identify with the same label. It's not a race to put a label on oneself either. I hope this insight was at least a bit helpful and interesting to read <3

#THANK YOU FOR THE ASK AAHH #I had to pull out my crappy laptop for this :D. MY KEYBOARD SUCKS SO BAD. the fucking E key is terrible. so sorry if I missed any missing E #I have no thoughts left in my brain. I woke up. saw the ask and hav been just working on a response #this was really fun to think about and help with tho. i lov it. thank you #anons for zephyr!#thats my name by the way lol. feel the need to clarify cause of zephyr ghoul..

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 1 year

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Hi Rachel! Hope things are going well for you! I was wondering, since this is a frequent topic on your blog/channel, how do you still enjoy your work while letting go of perfectionism? Enjoying what I write is super important to my process and with keeping me going, but the constant over-worrying and embarrassment of what I put down really slows me down and leaves me feeling terrible lol... I know I need to learn to think differently of my own work but I’m a bit uncertain of where to start and what else I could try and appreciate instead. Sorry if this is too vague or broad of a question! No pressure to come up with a solid, one answer or anything. Just hearing your thoughts/experiences would be helpful!

This is a really, really good question! I wrote THIS ask that sort of addresses this too, if you haven't already seen it!

I think at the end of the day, loving your writing despite perfectionism all comes down to graceful self-compassion. Not every day is going to be perfect. Sometimes I still hate my writing (me! right! now!), and it's good to know that ahead of time. If I'm aware I'm not always going to like my work (which is realistic for me), I can then also tell myself that it doesn't make sense to harp too long on things I don't like when my opinion will inevitably change.

Some days it's really about gritting your teeth and pretending you like the work (also! me! right! now!). Find words or lines or images you like and focus your energy there!

One of the mistakes I made when first endeavoring on my writing self-love journey was making goals that were too big. I remember when I wrote Moth Work, the goal was "let's just dump all my shit writing here and see where that goes" and where that went was me developing severe perfectionism LOL. I then went alllll the way to other extreme and was like "okay well let me make all this writing perfect" which is literally an impossible task! Eventually I found the middle.

Now, I'm able to write something like Seventh Virtue and be like "ah yes, let me dump all my shit writing here" because the project also demands different things. For MW, it made no sense to ask myself of that when a HUGE part of what I enjoyed about writing that book was the actual prose itself (I mean makes sense, it's literary fiction). For SV, the prose is important, but not THE most important thing, so my goal of "don't care what happens I just want to have fun" is more feasible within those genre constraints.

So perhaps look at the project you're writing & see where you can create a realistic goal for yourself? I find asking what I like about the project helps inform those goals. So as I said, I liked the pretty prose in MW, so I wanted to retain that. The goal then became, "alright, I'll draft what I can in the moment, and I'll accept that at points, I'm not going to feel comfortable and I will feel cringe and I will feel embarrassed. But after my drafting session, I'll come back and tinker with the draft if needed" (this is actually how I'm currently writing BODY BACK haha).

For Seventh Virtue, I'm quite sensitive to the plot being causally warranted, so the goal is "okay, I'll try to draft each scene from the previous so a firmer causal chain is created, but I will miss scenes, write scenes that aren't needed, etc, and that's fine because I can address that later."

When I realized I could tailor my goal for the specific project, things really opened up for me because it showed me I didn't need to stick to one writing process. On here, y'all get basically first draft Seventh Virtue (99% of it hasn't been touched since coming out of my brain), but get a franken first draft-ish (sometimes 2nd or 3rd) of BB because I cycle through phrasings in my mind while I write (which I don't do in SV LOL). Those are two different drafting processes, so they deserve two different goals so I can better enjoy them.

Also I would say... don't be afraid of discomfort. Writing is so uncomfortable sometimes. I mean look at me in 2020--I HATEEDDD MW! And now it's like... the best thing I've ever written, IMO. We're not objective critics of our own work when we go into it hating it so much (or being embarrassed/ashamed by it, etc, whatever emotion fits your current situation). So that shows us the feelings we're having are feelings, not facts. And feelings are good to have! But they don't have to dictate everything forever. Feel them, and then *try* to accept them and move on. That might not be easy, but the more you do it, the easier it becomes.

I used to STRESS so much when a sentence/scene/paragraph wasn't working. Is that how I explain the 30-60k of each novel I cut between 2018-2020? Yep! Now I stress a little less. And I hardly cut things until I get to the actual revision process (~2k/project).

Okay finally, I've been meaning to use this analogy and this is the perfect timing for it. I've been learning the fun fingerstyle guitar in Jeff Buckley's version of Corpus Christie Carol for almost two months now. When I first started learning that song, LOL, I couldn't play ANYYYY of it. It confused me. I was frustrated. But, I genuinely knew that if I kept practicing, it'd sound 100% better a couple months from now. And now I can almost play it well haha.

It's funny how writers (me included!) forget that practice and failing and sounding bad and writing nonsense is a very important part of the process, but how in other art forms, it's just a given. My brother is an incredible musician and I would never expect him to play a riff perfectly on the first go when he's only heard it once or twice. When he makes mistakes when playing, I either don't notice at all or don't care because it's a given. I just KNOW that as a musician, if I keep practicing, I'll eventually get it (and I almost always do--in some cases, it's too hard and I quit, and that's fine to do too).

I'm actually learning a new song on guitar rn, I'll record it and put it in a video as a visual haha. The amount of times you play the exact same note over and over again... The amount of times you KNOW you're playing the wrong thing but keep playing it wrong anyway because it hasn't quite clicked... It's all part of it! I still enjoy that practice, because it's fun! We can apply that to writing too.

#asks

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bonesandthebees · 2 years

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stars ch 8!!!!

loved it!!! i was so excited when i saw that there was a new chapter!!!

no lengthy analysis or theories today, just a few short questions:

did wilbur leave his glasses on eldingvegr??? it’s briefly mentioned in ch 1 that he wears glasses and then there’s no mention of them again (ik it’s probably bc it’s such a small detail to remember and isn’t that important to the overall story) but it’s fun to imagine the ways that could’ve gone down on zephys iv, like would he have asked about it while he was getting clothes that fit or is he so stressed that he forgets he needs them until it’s very obvious he does (i don’t wear glasses so idk what i’m talking about). also it would highlight the tragedy of their escape, they showed up on zephys iv in their sock feet and pjs and wil didn’t even have time to grab his glasses and had to fly a shuttle like that. (so much for this not being a long ask)

second question: several times you’ve mentioned tommy’s freckles glowing ink the dark; is this a subtle siren trait??? if so can you share some other traits the boys share with sirens???

thanks for everything!!!

- 💜

aaa ty i'm so glad you enjoyed!!

ok. ngl. i read "did wilbur leave his glasses-" and immediately went NOOOOOO out loud because i was PRAYING that no one noticed that. i'm gonna be 100% honest, I forgot I gave wilbur glasses after the first chapter and didn't remember it till I was literally in the middle of writing this chapter. like. i straight up forgot to mention the glasses again so that's entirely a mistake on my end. i was writing this chapter and went to reread something from chapter 1 and noticed the glasses and went oh fuck i haven't mentioned his glasses in like 7 chapters. so uhhh haha?? I'll probably make it a point to mention them next chapter, I think he lost them during the escape from Eldingvegr but he's just been dealing with so much other shit it got pushed to the back of his mind. his vision isn't that bad without his glasses, he can still function for the most part but I will probably just mention that he gets a new pair of glasses on Zephys IV lmao

and yes tommy's freckles glowing in the dark is a siren trait!! wilbur's freckles glow as well! I believe I mentioned that a bit in chapter 2 or 3 but I can't remember for sure. it's one of their only really distinctive 'siren' traits they inherited from their mother, and one of the only ways you could tell the boys were part siren if you didn't already know. wilbur looks a tad more siren-esque than tommy does, but it's extremely subtle. his ears are just slightly pointed, and his teeth and nails are a tad sharper than a normal humans would be, but again it's subtle enough that most people wouldn't notice unless they already knew he was part siren. tommy has the slightly sharper teeth, but his ears and nails are normal. there's no real reason for the difference, they're both half human half siren, but it's just the way the genetics worked out (y'know, how sometimes you look more like one parent than the other just by chance)

#ask #purple-heart anon #the stars and their children

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m0e-ru · 2 years

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You gained a power beyond humans. Do you remember that time? "Power beyond humans"? Huh, you mean that thing…? What do you want with it? I intend to summon that power. But… it needs to be tamed. Minazuki's eyes waver like red flames. …Hm, I see. Looks like he's been given "power," just like me. For that, I require your assistance. You will cooperate with me. You have no choice in this. Minazuki points his katana at me again. With my power, I didn't have much control. I was taken over by some mysterious force and had no memory of it. He's poked around my personal profile, but he's missing the most important part? I guess he's just some brat after all; he can't do his research. To be honest, I really don't want to get involved in this, but the right choice is to act like I'm interested and get as much information out of this kid as possible. Depending on how things go, this guy might become a hindrance to me. I'll decide how to make my move once I've heard what he has to say. After I make an interested face, he surprisingly tells me the full outline of his plan. He's going to gather Shadows until he has a giant collection of them, like a pile of sculpting clay. Using that as a "vessel," he plans to summon what he called "power beyond the bounds of man" to inhabit it. But in order to pacify such a powerful being, he apparently needs "Persona fragments" that are created when Personas use their powers on one another. So he thought up the idea of creating a one-on-one tournament between Persona-users, calling it the "P-1 Climax." Plus, he's made some exact duplicates of people out of Shadows in order to force them into fighting one another. I have to admit, he made an effort. In addition, he's already taken some Persona-users belonging to an organization called the Shadow Operatives hostage. He's definitely planned for this, though I don't really get the point of crucifying his captives on those tacky crosses. Anyway, blah blah blah, I've been "called in" to help him collect the fragments and help him get a hold of that power within the giant Shadow. It all sounds pretty stupid, really, but Minazuki is deadly serious. He really intends to go through with this. Ugh… How did he manage to come up with a plan that's such a convoluted pain in the ass? Maybe it's just because I haven't been around for a while, but I'm actually impressed at how ridiculous this scheme of his is. Haha… Just… for curiosity's sake… How were you planning to use me…? Hahahahaha! I think you're misunderstanding me! You know the whole "taming" business…? I wasn't planning to rely on your knowledge to begin with, moron! All I need… is your Persona! I was gonna rip off your Persona, turn it into a Shadow, slam it into the gathered Shadows, and prrresto! Adachi's part is done. He was going to turn my Persona into a Shadow and fuse it with the Shadows he was collecting? I don't have a clue what he's talking about. As I lie there, confused, Sho holds his stomach and laughs merrily. Hyaaahahahaha! Ooh, I love that stupid look on your face! It's so great, I'm gonna let you in on some more secrets. Seems like the power left in you interferes with the thing I'm planning to absorb! I guess that "power beyond humanity" clashes with each other? But when that happens, that thing won't be at its full strength! So, if you think about it the other way around, using your power stops that thing from doing whatever it wants! And then I get to tame it! So, in order to control the "power" he was going for, he has to counter it with even more power, huh? I think I see a flaw in that reasoning, but given that we're talking about a "power surpassing the realm of man" here, logic might be going out the window. Once everything was ready and I cut up the rest of them, I was going to kill you slow! Still… aI at least gave you the chance to have some fun, you piece of sh

#kommento #// shoutout to the fucking dialogue ever #// im going to bed (its 3pm

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bldcatlog · 10 days

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yap session 4eva

How does one even study for English? I think I'm actually finished. My exams tomorrow and fuck LOL maybe I should've tried studying.

Yesterday, I worked. Enough said. Nah let me rant actually! Holy shit it was so busy god dam! Makoto kept fucking up and saying he's hungry and it's the funniest shit ever. We had a 30 minute lunch at 2pm (we started at 7:45).

I was talking to my co worker and I'm glad for him. He showed me the girl he might be marrying in the upcoming years and that's lovely for him and I hope it goes really well. He told me that I'm invited ONLY if I do my shahada LOL. He told me how his parents would've invited me to his house for Iftar if he had told them that I was interested in it earlier. I think next ramadan I'll try to go to a few group Iftars.

After I worked out and then Aaron and Kaz asked to hangout. I was like uhhh fuck it why not (as it was around 7:30 by now and I was a bit tired). It was a 30 minute drive to Southside oh my days. But I'm genuinely glad I went. I never hanged out with them properly outside of school and it was very fun. We chilled at Aaron's and played some games. Aaron talked about the trauma and work ethic of being a ex Irish dancer and god I gotta respect it a lot. That's so much dedication and effort to achieve as much as he did. It's very sad to hear how it physically and mentally damaged him. I did some breakdancing and played the guitar a little bit with them. Kaz talked about taekwondo and how he used to do piano recitals when he was younger. We also talked about how fucked we've been from burnout LOL. None of us showed up to some classes for like two months HAHAHAHAHA. We all took off all our shirts and flexed in his home gym it's actually so hilarious thinking of it. I need to get a little more in shape. We then drove to Walmart ( I showed a little zoom zoom) and get a basketball and played at the park near by. god how nice is the Southside really? it's genuinely so pretty. the sky was abundant and the stars were glistening. We played playground tag aswell but it was so dark and we could not touch the ground. That was genuinely the most fun activity I did in so long HAHA!

If I move Southside fr I wonder how I'd grow as a person? Living in the basement suite with my own kitchen and laundry and entrance. Will I achieve a new sense of freedom the nI already have? or will I form new connections from this exclusivity ? I'd love to invited friends over and cook food and talk and talk and yap! I'd do it bi-weekly weekends and I'd film it aswell. I'll be a niche home chef tiktoker. SLUT! Joking of course, I want to strengthen my relationships with the people I've met throughout this year.

I keep waking up in a cold sweat. Maybe my blankets are too warm now.

I was talking with Xiadani in the work group chat and I think I must be hated in the group chat the way I tweak out LOLOL. I don't think I've been in bbw a few months now HAHAHAHA. I hope I don't get fired. I loved the work gossip.

I feel like a fundamental part of me is my individuality and self-expression. I think with Islam I felt like I was giving up parts of myself that I felt so important. I understood that sacrificing some aspects of your life for a the grand scheme is something everyone does but I felt tethered to my connections I've made. I felt at a point it made me wonder am I really seen as a sin in this religion? Although, I felt as if I had done nothing wrong? Can someone really be judged for actions that are not made from the same foundation another's is? I sort of felt that all I was, was a temptation. I think it's because the things I heard were "haram" I saw the good and love in them and of course the bad in the over indulgence in them. and I guess for a moment it made me very hesitant to pick the Qur'an back up. I don't wish to fight someone for an answer but rather seek guidance and seek to understand.

I'll start studying now.

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rebelyelll · 29 days

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Chapter 13 Author's Note

I am so sorry if this update came across as cringey in any way, shape, or form. I was having fun, okay? 😭 That line Tenmei makes on the way to the heist was something I just made up. However, I didn't know what a #0 hex machine screw nut was until this moment lmao. Ahhh, the joy of researching for fics, am I right?

Also, yes. That was a "deez nuts" reference he made... lol.

I'm not too proud with the display of one bit of the lore. The soap opera. Omg... I don't know, I don't watch soaps. Although I do faintly recall that being all there was on TV back when I was in school. I had this dinky-ass Zenith in my old bedroom growing up, and it was an antenna TV. Literally the only channels I had were 3, 12, maybe 9 on a good day, 24, and 32 sometimes. AUX was also one, obviously. Probably my most favorite of all of them if I'm being honest, because I always hooked up the SNES any chance I got.

Yeah. I'm that old. Surprise! 90s kids - if you know, you know.

Anyways, back to the soaps talk. I did NOT enjoy watching that shit. Even if I didn't sit there and consume a lot of it, I recall the fact I just couldn't get into them. So, if the soap opera scene in Chapter 13 is janky and weird, that's partially why lmao. It's because I know next to nothing about them. I didn't like writing that, but I felt like it would be a neat opportunity to expand a bit on the lore a little. In a way it serves as a little joke about the Days of Our Lives never ending.

And then there's the Gendarmes segment. Oh boy. This one is based on a personal memory of mine from when I was around 2 or 3 years old. If you are familiar with the show Cops, then yeah. You get it. My dad used to watch that show ALL the time. My mom would tell me about how every time the theme song came up on the TV, toddler me would run through the house going "bad boys, daddy, bad boys."

Sometimes I like to imagine how that scenario played out. The way my mom talked about it, I wish I could remember something like that. It's a sentimental thing between me and my dad, so it is immortalized now!

Oh right! Another thing I keep forgetting to bring up is the French translations in the fic. No, I don't have anyone as a translator. Let me explain lmao. I research the hell out of translations. Punching things in google translate and going "good enough" isn't the extent of it, either. I dig deep. I need to know it's the right one. I've taken some French courses on Duolingo, but I'm not the best at it retaining what I've learned sadly. (That's with most anything I learn about mind you.)

It's funny because it's always the trivial knowledge that sticks; seems like it's never the important stuff lmao. Learning languages is pretty hard. I'm okay with Spanish. I took a high school course and learned how to conjugate verbs and the use of pronouns. Fun fact about my school: we USED to have a French class, but that got replaced with the Spanish one for some reason. I don't know why. I'm glad I got to learn Spanish, because I've memorized quite a bit (curse words included). But I really wish we could've kept the French courses. That would have been pretty useful and fun.

I keep swearing I'll go far for writing research, too. Especially for Whiplash. To the point I'm like "I'm going to France to learn to speak the language." But I ALREADY know that if I did that, with the little knowledge I've got, it'll boil down to me saying: "bonjour! comment ça va?" and the other person will utter unfamiliar words in a long sentence or two and, I just stand there frozen. "Huh...?" lmao.

Damn, that would be cool if I could do that, though. Oh, well! lol.

I can't remember if the fic states this or not in the narrative, but Canneberge's name is French for Cranberry. I said to myself: "what if I pulled a Golden Wind and named a character after a fruit, haha". Well, that was part of the naming scheme with them, the other reason they are named that is after the band, The Cranberries. I won't go too in depth with this character's stand or character concept just yet, because the fight between them and Tenmei continues in Chapter 15. So, I'll just save that information for that author's note when the time comes. Recurring characters like Husselhoff and Tiny Dancer are back. Their dynamic's one of my favs. I do worry though that people will read it at some point and say: "Ughhh, this trope is cliche and dumb." I wish my brain would shut up, man...

If you've ever played any of the older Final Fantasy games, you may recall a couple characters named Biggs and Wedge that make cameos throughout the series. Husselhoff and Tiny Dancer are loosely based on that, because that was something I always got a kick out of when I'd play the FF games. 6 and 9 being the two that really stood out. Never played 7, so I can't say for sure if they make an appearance there. 8, I don't remember?? But I think they did? It's been years since I played FF8. Since I played any of them lmao!

I want to say 4 had a Biggs and Wedge as well, but.... ehhhh...?

References

The Chapter title, Keeper of the Seven Keys -- a reference to a song by a power metal band called Helloween.

the soap opera characters, Edith and Marko -- Edith is named for Edit Piaf, a French singer. Marko is named after the bass guitarist of Nightwish, Marko Hietala (omfg I hope I spelled that correctly...) Note: HIS VOCALS ARE KILLER IN THE BEST WAY

(I can't think of any others right now, so that probably sums it up there.)

#author's note #whiplash riot

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