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winchesterbrotherstan · 4 years

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SPN- Playthings (2.11)

Pairing: Olive Winchester (sister OC)

Summary: After a month of searching for Ava with no results, the siblings accept a case from Ellen. Sam spirals after a secret is revealed, Olive plays caretaker, and Dean makes a promise he can’t keep.

Warnings: uh, like a ghost, the word gun is in there one time (wow), uh there’s some cursing, DOLLS ARE FUCKING CREEPY OKAY, uhh, olive says the word milf, uh like, idk?? mentions of dead ppl??

Word Count: 6079

“Yeah. Okay. Thanks, Ellen.” Sam hung up the phone as I unlocked the door, pushing it open with my foot.

“What’d she have to say?” Dean shut the door behind him.

“Oh, she’s got nothing.” Sam sighed. “Me, I’ve been checking every database I can think of. Federal, state, local. No one’s heard anything about Ava. She just… into thin air, you know?”

Dean sighed and handed Sam one of the coffee cups. Sam looked over at us with hopeful puppy eyes.

“What about you?”

Dean and I shared a look. I shook my head and turned back to Sam.

“Nothing yet. I’m sorry, bubs.”

Sam sighed. “Ellen did have one thing.”

“What was it?” Dean sat down at the table.

I dropped onto Sam’s bed and began to work at my shoes.

“A hotel in Cornwall, Connecticut. Two freak accidents in the past three weeks.”

Dean looked at me. I shrugged.

“I’m confused, what’s this have to do with Ava?”

Sam shook his head. “No, it’s just a job. A lady drowned in the bathtub, then a few days ago a guy falls down the stairs. His head does a complete one-eighty. Not exactly normal, you know. I dunno, guys, it might be nothing, but I told Ellen we’d think about checking it out.”

Sam looked at us. I shrugged again.

“Sounds good to me.”

“Wait, you did?” Dean furrowed his eyebrows.

“Yeah.” Sam frowned. “Why do you seem surprised?”

“Well, it’s just… you know…” Dean scratched the back of his neck. “Not the uh, patented Sam Winchester way. Is it?”

Sam raised an eyebrow.. “And what way is that?”

“Oh, you know, I just figured that after Ava, there’d be, uh… ya now, more angst and droopy music and staring out rainy windows and-”

Sam shot Dean a bitchface, and he chuckled.

“Okay. I’ll shut up now.”

“Look.” Sam huffed. “I’m the one who told her to go back home. And now her fiancé’s dead and some demon snatched her and took her God knows where. But we’ve been looking for a month now, and we’ve still got nothing. I’m not giving up on her, but I’m not gonna sit by and let other people die either. We’ve gotta save as many people as we can.”

“Wow.” Dean blinked. “That attitude is just way too healthy for me. I’m officially uncomfortable now. Thanks.”

Sam ducked his head and laughed. I shuffled from the bed to stand behind him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and leaned over him. He patted my arm with a smile.

“Alright.” Dean huffed dramatically. “Call Ellen, tell her we’ll take it.”

***

I yawned as Dean put the Impala in park. We had stayed in the car for the night, and with Jinx and my most recent growth spurt, it proved to be more difficult than we had remembered. I kicked Dean in my sleep, and my leg had twisted up weird.

“Dude, this is sweet.” Dean grinned as we poured out of the car. “I never get to work jobs like this.”

“Like what?”

“Old school haunted houses, you know? Fog, secret passageways… sissy British accents. Might even run into Fred and Daphne while we’re inside.” Dean closed his eyes with a smile and a soft sigh. “Mmm, Daphne. Love her.”

I shook my head as we started up the porch stairs.

“Hey, wait a sec.” Sam held a hand out, stopping us both short.

I turned back down the steps, staring at an urn on the side of the stairs. Dean stopped walking and looked at us over his shoulder.

“I’m not so sure haunted’s the problem.”

“What do you mean?”

“See the pattern?” Sam squatted next to the urn and tapped a five point symbol engraved in a sun. “That’s a quincunx.”

“A five-spot.” I hummed.

“Five-spot.” Dean repeated.

“Yeah.”

“That’s used for hoodoo spellwork, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. You fill this thing with bloodweed and you’ve got a powerful charm to ward off enemies.”

“Yeah, except I don’t see any bloodweed.” Dean smacked his lips. “Don’t you think this place is a little too, uh… whitemeat for hoodoo?”

Sam huffed as we looked around. “Maybe.”

We filed into the inn one by one. Dean caught the front lady’s attention, and Sam and I took our sweet time closing the door, observing the old timey interior.

“May I help you?”

“Hi, yeah, I’d like a room for a couple of nights.” Dean smiled.

Sam and I shared a look before he stepped into the lobby. A little girl wearing an old school-uniform bumped into Sam’s legs as she ran across the room. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up straight, and Jinx barked. I knelt next to her and shushed her, smoothing her fur out.

“Hey!” The lady shouted before looking at Sam. “I’m so sorry about that.”

Sam shook his head, a dismissive frown on his face. “No problem.”

“Well, um, congratulations. You could be some of our final guests.”

“Well. Sounds vaguely ominous.” Dean huffed.

“No, I’m sorry. I mean we’re closing at the end of the month.” The lady looked over the two. “Let me guess. You guys are here antiquing?”

Dean looked back at Sam with a why not look before turning back. “How’d you know?”

“Oh, you just look the type.”

I could sense Dean’s discomfort. Sam stepped forward.

“Sorry, uh, are you guys pet friendly? She’s well trained, we just didn’t have anywhere to leave her.”

“Normally we’re not, but since we’re so close to shutting down, it’s fine.”

Sam nodded at me and I slowly brought Jinx in.

“So, uh, one king-sized bed?”

“What?” Sam blinked.

“Oh, oh, oh, uh, no. No, no, no.” I shook my head, popping in between the two. “No, two singles.” I circled my finger around the three of us. “We’re just siblings.”

“Oh.” The lady’s eyes widened. “Oh, I’m so sorry.”

Dean tilted his head. “What’d you mean that we look the type?”

She stared down while looking for something to say. Sam cleared his throat.

“You know, speaking of antiques, you have a really, really interesting urn on the front porch. Where’d you get that?”

“Oh, I have no idea.” She smiled, grateful for the out. “It’s been there forever.”

She handed Dean a room key. “Here you go, Mr. Mahagov.”

Dean gave her the classic white-people smile and took the key. “Thanks.”

The lady rang the bell on the counter. “You’ll be staying in room 237. Sherwin, could you show these fine folks to their room?”

Dean and I turned to see an old, balding man dressed formally shuffling up behind us. “Let me guess. Antiquers?”

The three of us bit our tongues as Sherwin took Dean’s bag from him and began to lead us up the stairs. Sam and I opted to keep ours on our shoulders. Sam scooped Jinx off her feet and held her to his chest as we followed Sherwin. Dean’s duffel bag wouldn’t stop clunking, and I was horrified a gun would somehow go off. Dean scratched the back of his neck.

“I could give you a hand with that bag.”

“I got it.”

“Okay.” Dean licked his lips and gave me a look.

I patted his arm. Sam cleared his throat.

“So, the hotel’s closing up, huh?”

“Yep. Miss Susan tried to make a go of it, but the guests just don’t come like they used to. Still, it’s a damn shame.”

“Oh, yeah?” Sam spoke in a tell-us-more tone.

“It may not look it anymore, but this place was a palace. Two different vice-presidents laid their heads on our pillows. My parents worked here, I practically grew up here. Gonna miss it.” Sherwin sighed as he unlocked our room and pushed the door open. “Here’s your room.”

He handed Sam the key and nodded as we shuffled into the room. Dean turned to shut the door, only to see that Sherwin was standing there, hand out.

“You’re not gonna… cheap out on me. Are you, boy?”

Dean sighed as he pulled out his wallet.

***

Sam ran a hand through his hair as he skimmed over the paper in his hand. I yawned and put down the paper I had just finished reading. Dean was pacing. He let out a dry chuckle, then a mumble of curses.

“What?” Sam and I didn’t look up.

“That’s normal.” Dean huffed.

I looked up as he stood next to me, arms crossed over his chest. There was an old wedding dress pinned up to the wall. I sucked in air through my teeth as Dean moved to sit on one of the beds.

“Why the hell would anyone stay here? I’m amazed they kept in business this long.” He dropped onto the bed, which sunk further under him.

“Alright, victim number one.” I spoke up, waving the paper. “Joan Edison, forty three years old. Realtor handling the sale of the hotel. Victim number two?” I looked over at Sam.

“Larry Williams. Moving some stuff out to Goodwill.”

“Well, there’s a connection. They’re both tied up in shutting the place down.”

“Yeah.” Sam hummed. “Maybe somebody here doesn’t wanna leave, and they’re using hoodoo to fight back.”

“Who do you think our witch doctor is? That Susan lady?”

“Nah.” Sam shook his head. “Doesn’t seem likely. I mean, she is the one selling.”

“Maybe Sherwin?” I offered.

“I don’t know.” Sam shrugged.

“Of course, the most troubling question is why do these people assume we’re gay?”

“Well…” Sam hummed. “You are kinda butch. Probably think you’re overcompensating.”

I snorted. “It’s cause you’re a bottom and Sam’s not.” I mumbled.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” I mumbled again.

“Ha fucking ha.” Dean narrowed his eyes at me with a huff.

***

“This place is weird.” I stuck to Dean’s side as we poked around the hallways.

“Hey, look.” Sam pulled another urn off a table. “More hoodoo.”

Dean made a face before looking around. He stalked off toward a door marked PRIVATE and knocked. Sam put the urn down and we crowded Dean in the doorway, eyes wide as we looked around.

The door opened, revealing Susan. “Hi.”

“Hi there.” Dean gave his charming grin.

“Everything okay with your room?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Oh, yeah everything’s great.”

“Well-”

“Well, I was, I was just in the middle of packing.” She cut Dean off as the three of us talked over each other.

“Hey!” Dean’s face lit up as he looked past her. “Are those antique dolls? Cause this one,” he turned and picked his victim. “Sammy here’s got a major doll collection back home. Don’t ya?”

He gave Susan a polite smile that, hopefully, screamed murder to Dean. “Big time.”

“Big time. You think he could come, or we could come in and take a look?”

Susan shifted. “I don’t know…”

“Please?” Dean begged. “I mean, he loves them. He’s not gonna tell you this, but he’s uh, he’s always dressing em up in their tiny little outfits, and uh,” he shrugged, “honestly, you’d make his day. You- she would, huh?” He turned to Sam with a grin.

Sam looked sick. “It’s true.”

“Okay.” Susan stepped aside. “Come on in.”

“Alright! Alright.” Dean slapped Sam’s back as we trudged into the room.

Sam gave him another death glare and I pushed myself between the two as we looked around the room.

“Wow.” Dean hummed. “That’s a lot of dolls.” He feigned a smile. “I mean, they’re nice, ya know.” He looked down at me and mumbled. “Not super creepy at all.”

Susan laughed. “Yeah, I suppose they are a little creepy. But they’ve been in the family forever. A lot of sentimental value.”

“What is this?” Sam was on the other end of the room, walking around a huge dollhouse. “The hotel?”

“Yeah, that’s right.” Susan smiled. “Exact replica, custom built.”

Sam frowned and picked something up off the ground. “His head got twisted around.” He held a doll up so Dean and I could see.

Dean and I shared a look before turning to Susan.

“What happened to it?”

“Oh, Tyler, probably.”

We forced understanding smiles, and the second Susan turned her back, we gave each other bug eyes.

What the fuck?

“Mommy!” Tyler ran in. “Maggie’s being mean!”

“Tyler, tell her I said to be nice, okay.”

“Hey, Tyler.” Sam came over with a soft smile on his face. “I see you broke your doll. You want me to fix it?”

“I didn’t break it.” Tyler pouted. “I found it like that.”

“Oh.” Sam smiled wider. “Well, maybe Maggie did it.”

I sighed. Sometimes it broke my heart to know he’d never have a family of his own.

“No.” Tyler shook her head. “Neither of us did it. Grandma would get mad if we broke them.”

“Oh, Tyler.” Susan hummed. “She wouldn’t get mad.”

“Grandma?” Dean took a step forward.

“Grandma Rose. These were all her toys.”

“Oh, really?” Dean looked around. “Where’s Grandma Rose now?”

“Up in her room.”

“You know, I’d, I’d, uh, I’d really love to talk to Rose about her incredible doll-”

“No.” Susan cut Sam off. “I mean, I’m afraid that’s impossible. My mother’s been very sick and she’s not taking any visitors.”

We were promptly ushered out of the room, and the door was shut behind us.

“What do you guys think?” Dean began. “Dolls, hoodoo, mysterious shut-in grandma?”

“Boys, I hate to say it, I really do. But I think we’re in a horror movie.”

Sam ran a hand over his face and Dean gave me a gentle push. “Every time you say that, something goes terribly wrong. Have you realized that?”

I frowned. “No. I just kinda say things.”

Sam sighed. “Okay, well dolls are used in all kinds of voodoo and hoodoo. Curses, binding spells…”

“Yeah, maybe we’ve found our witch doctor. Alright, I’ll see what I can go dig up on booming granny. You go get online, check old obits, freak accidents, that sort of thing. See if she’s whacked anybody before.”

***

“Jesus Christ.” I hissed as I shut the room door behind me, leaning on it.

Sam looked up, teary eyed. “What happened?”

“Uh… lawyer. He hung himself.”

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose and looked down. His shoulders began to shake, and I felt my heart soften.

“Sammy…”

He looked up, tears falling down in streaks. “Jessica was pregnant.”

I stopped cold. “What?”

He pushed his hair out of his face. “She was pregnant. Becky called me.”

“Becky… Becky from a year ago?”

He nodded. “She knew, and she never said a thing.”

“Hold on, Sammy…” I trailed off as I sat down on the table. “When?”

He looked away. “When…” He licked his lips and let out a strangled sob. “When she died.”

He began to weep, and I scrambled to my feet, pulling him into my chest. He gripped fistfuls of my jacket, and I ran a hand through his hair as the other held his shoulders tightly.

“Sammy, I’m so sorry.” I whispered.

“I couldn’t save the lawyer. I couldn’t even save Jess.” He whimpered.

“Sams, neither were your fault.”

“I was gonna be a dad.”

“I am so sorry, Sammy.” I pressed a long kiss to the top of his head and bit back my own tears.

“I should’ve done something.”

I rubbed his back. “Sams, there is nothing you could’ve done.”

He pulled back and wiped his face. “I dreamt about it! I could’ve done something! I could’ve saved her! What if something happens to you? O-o-or to Dean? I’m useless.”

My heart shattered, and I cupped his face, bending down so that we were nose to nose.

“You are not useless. You’re my brother. Dean and I need you.”

He shook his head, pushing my hands away. “I’m gonna go for a walk.”

He stumbled to his feet, and I sighed as his breath hit my face. I grabbed his wrists and pulled him back.

“Sams, you’re drunk.”

“So? You think I won’t be able to go on a walk?” He challenged.

“No.” I whispered. “But I’m not gonna let you go out into a haunted hotel while you’re wasted.”

He huffed. “I just-”

“Do you need to be alone?”

He nodded.

“Okay.” I tugged him back toward his chair. “Stay here. I’ll go for a walk.” I glanced at my watch. “I’ll be back in half an hour. Okay?”

He nodded again as he dropped into his seat. I cupped his face again.

“I love you. Okay?”

He nodded.

“I’ll be back soon.” I kissed his head again before grabbing Jinx’s leash and calling her over.

She bolted out the door and sat in the hall. I looked over my shoulder to see Sam with his head in his hands. I sighed and shut the door.

***

Jinx yawned as she dropped to her stomach. I had walked her around the neighborhood, which was, like the hotel, creepy. It was picturesque, but the antique feeling was everywhere, and it was one I didn’t like.

Somebody started up the stairs, and I didn’t look up as I scooted over, trying to give them more space to walk.

“Sweetheart?”

I looked up to see Dean. I sighed.

“What happened? Where’s Sam?”

“Um…” I stood and avoided eye contact.

“Ol.” Dean craned his neck to catch my eye. “Why did I see a coroner’s van-”

“A lawyer hung himself.”

“Jesus.” Dean huffed.

“Look… Jess was pregnant.”

“What?”

“Jessica. When she died. She was pregnant. Sam just found out.”

Dean’s eyes bugged out of his head. “Wh…”

“Just cut him some slack. Okay?”

Dean huffed. “Fine. Come on.”

We trudged up the stairs and into the lobby in silence.

“Uh, hey.” Susan caught our attention. “I’m sure you heard about the lawyer… look, if you’d like to check out, I can give you a full refund.”

I shook my head. “No. Thanks.”

“We don’t scare that easily.” Dean pulled me to keep walking.

He led the way up the stairs and pushed the door open.

“There’s been another one. Lawyer hung himself.” He called into the room.

“We know.” Sam grunted.

I shut the door and flicked the lights on.

“We’ve gotta figure this out, and fast.” Dean huffed. “What’d you find out about Granny?”

“You’re bossy.” Sam snorted out.

I cursed to myself as Dean spun around. “What?”

“You’re bossy. And short.” Sam let out a sloppy laugh.

A glare formed on Dean’s face as he looked my way, then back at Sam. “Are you drunk?”

“Yeah.” Sam laughed again. “So? Stupid.”

Dean looked around and spotted the empty bottles. His shoulders fell and he shook his head at me. I looked down at the ground.

“Dude. What are you thinking? We’re working a case.” Dean barked out.

Sam stared down at the ground, tearful again. “That guy who hung himself. I couldn’t save him.”

“What are you talking about? You didn’t know. You couldn’t have done anything, Sam.

“That’s an excuse, Dean.” Sam huffed. “I should’ve found a way to save him. I should’ve saved Ava, too.”

Dean made a face, and I grabbed his wrist. “Hey. Slack. Remember? We’re cutting him some slack.”

Dean sighed and took a few steps toward Sam. “Well, you can’t save everyone. Even you said that.”

“No, Dean, you don’t understand!” Sam slammed the table. “The more people I save, the more I can change!”

My heart fell to my stomach.

“Change what, Sam?” Dean shook his head.

“My destiny, Dean!” Sam leaned forward, his hands on his chest

Dean sighed. “Alright. Time for bed. Come on, Sasquatch.” He pulled Sam up by the shoulders. “Come on.”

“I need you to watch out for me.” Sam huffed as Dean pushed him toward the bed.

“I always do.”

“No! No, no, no. You have to watch out for me, alright? And if I ever…” Sam huffed again. “Turn into something that I’m not…”

My skin began to crawl, and Dean tilted his head.

“You have to kill me.” Sam looked over Dean’s shoulder, at me. “Either of you.”

“No!” I spat.

“Sam.” Dean’s tone was dismissive.

“Dean! Dad told you to do it, you have to.”

“Yeah, well, Dad was an ass.” Dean snarled.

Sam frowned, confusion washing over his face.

“He never should have said anything. I mean, you don't do that, you don't, you don't lay that kind of crap on your kids.”

“No. He was right to say it! Who knows what I might become?” Sam whined. “Even now, everyone around me dies!”

“Yeah, well, Olive and I aren’t dying, okay?”

“And neither are you.” I hissed as I helped Dean maneuver Sam onto the bed. “Come on, Sams.”

He sat on the bed, but he wouldn’t lay down. He grabbed Dean’s jacket and pulled him close. “No, Dean, please!” Sam whined again. “You’re the only one who can do it. Promise.”

“Don’t ask that of me.” Dean shook his head.

“Dean, please.” Sam begged. “You have to promise me.”

Dean looked away, and I caught his eye. I shook my head, eyes wide and full of tears. Dean sniffled, tears collecting in his own eyes.

“Don’t.” I hissed.

He looked back at Sam. “I promise.”

“Thanks.” Sam reached up to grab Dean’s face. “Thank you.”

Dean batted Sam’s hand away. I climbed onto the bed and pulled Sam to lay down as Dean lifted his legs onto the bed. Sam turned and planted his face onto my chest, wrapping both of his arms around me. I hugged him back and glared at Dean as he ran a hand over his face.

***

“Oh god.” Sam’s voice was hoarse.

“Sams?” I whispered.

He slowly rolled onto his back with a huff. “Oh fuck.”

“Hey.” I sat up and pushed his hair out of his face.

“I’m gonna be sick.”

“Oh. Oh god, oh no.” I hissed as he scrambled off the bed, stumbling his way to the bathroom.

He barely made it as he threw up. I groaned. Taking care of the boys while they were black out drunk was one thing, but hungover and throwing up was another story.

“Oh, bambi.” I whispered, helping him settle on his knees. “Come on, let’s take your jacket off.” I eased the denim fabric from his shoulders.

“Shit.” He groaned.

“Come on. Shoes, too.” I rubbed his shoulders.

“You don’t have to take care of me.” He fussed as he kicked his shoes off.

“You always take care of me.” I knelt by his side and brushed a thumb over his cheek. “Let me take care of you.”

He gave me a soft smile, but it fell. His face drained of color, and he turned back to the toilet. I sighed as I rubbed his back. He spat into the toilet again. I shushed him soothingly.

“How are you feeling, Sammy?” Dean all but shouted as he entered the room, out of view.

Sam groaned before dry heaving. I stood up and crouched behind him, pulling his hair into a small ponytail. I tucked what didn’t stay behind his ears.

“I guess mixing whiskey and Jäger wasn’t such a gangbuster idea, huh?”

Sam ignored him.

“I’ll bet you don’t remember a single thing from last night, do you?” Dean asked, hope in his eyes.

I shot him a glare, and he cleared his throat. Sam only huffed before letting out another groan.

“No, I can still taste the fucking tequila.”

A relieved smile grew on Dean’s face, and I sighed as I rubbed Sam’s back again, sitting on the edge of the tub. He leaned down on his feet with a groan. I pulled the hand towel off the ring and wiped the sweat off his forehead. He dropped onto his butt and leaned into me, head hitting my chest. I cooed as I pushed stray hairs from his face.

“You know, there’s a really good hangover remedy.” Dean cracked a devilish grin.

“Dean.” I warned.

“It’s a, uh, it’s a greasy pork sandwich served up in a dirty ashtray.”

“Oh, I hate you.” Sam popped back to his knees to throw up.

“I know you do.” Dean laughed. “Hey, turns out when Grandma Rose was a tyke, she had a Creole nanny who wore a hoodoo necklace.” He leaned in the doorway and huffed, waving the air in front of his nose. “God, it fucking stinks in here.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me.” I grumbled back.

“Whew.” Dean hummed. “Sometimes I forget you have better senses than we do.”

“Okay, you think the nanny taught Rose hoodoo?”

“Yes I do.” Dean crossed his arms over his chest.

“Alright.” Sam stumbled to his feet. “I think it’s time we’ve talked to Rose, then.”

His breath hit my face and I held back my own gag. “Oh, Sams.” I stepped back. “You’ve gotta brush your teeth first.”

***

“I’ll see you guys later.” I pressed a kiss to Sam’s cheek, then to Dean’s.

“See you, baby.” Dean grinned.

“Love you, bug.” Sam gave me a kind smile.

“Love you guys too. Be safe.”

“Always, you too!” Dean called as I shut the car door and started across the parking lot.

I tugged on the straps of my backpack as I walked up the steps and into the school. I fished the crumpled schedule from my back pocket and sighed.

World geography.

“Hey.”

I looked up to see a blond boy my age smiling at me.

“Hi.” I feigned a smile back.

“Need help finding your classes? I moved here a few years ago, I’ve got the building pretty much down.” He chuckled.

I shrugged. “Sure, why not?”

“Adam.” He held his hand out.

I shook it. “Olive.”

He chuckled. “Nice name.”

I rolled my eyes with a smile. “Thanks. My brothers love food.”

“Brothers?” He repeated as we walked. “Yikes.”

I shook my head. “Nah. They’re good. You got any siblings?”

“I’m an only child.”

I let out a low whistle. “Sucks.”

***

“See ya around, Olive!” Adam waved.

I put a hand up. “See ya.”

“Hey, kid.” Dean grinned as he pulled up, windows down.

“Hey, De. Hi, Sams.” I slid into the backseat.

Jinx was curled up, and our bags were on the floor. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“What happened?”

“Oh, uh…”

“We got kicked out.”

“What?” My eyes widened as I looked up. “How? Why?”

“Susan caught us trying to talk to Rose.”

“Oh god.” I rolled my eyes.

“Look, she had a stroke. There’s no way she was practicing hoodoo.”

I sighed and leaned forward as Dean drove off. “Then what’s happening at the hotel?”

The boys shook their heads. I sighed again.

“Let’s go back.”

“What?”

“We can’t, sweetie.”

“Yes we can.” I scoffed.

“How?” Dean eyed me in the rearview.

I shrugged. “Easy. I’ll just tell her you guys forgot to pack some of my stuff. She seemed to like me. She’ll let me back in.”

The boys shared a brief look, and Dean sighed. “Fine. Ten minutes, in and out.”

I grinned. “Works for me.”

***

“Is that…” Sam squinted and leaned forward.

“Shit, Dean, stop the car!” I squeaked.

He slammed the brakes, and I pushed the door open before taking off in a sprint, tackling Susan out of the way. The car crashed into the tree on the edge of the playground and Susan panted as we sat up.

“You okay?” I asked.

“I think so.”

“Come on, come on.” Dean and Sam came scrambling.

I got to my feet, and my knee slipped out from under me. I crashed onto my ass with a grumble. Dean sighed and plucked me off the ground as Sam helped Susan up.

“Inside, let’s go.”

Sam led the way, guiding Susan by the shoulders. She huffed as we walked into the dining room.

“Whiskey.” She sat down.

“Sure.” Sam scoffed. “I know the feeling.”

Susan looked up as Dean eased me into a seat at the table. I hissed as he knelt down, rubbing my knee.

“What the fuck happened out there?” Susan demanded.

Sam and I blinked, and Dean popped my knee. I let out a curse as I shot up straight, tears in my eyes.

“You want the truth?” Dean asked.

“Of course!”

“Well, at first we thought it was some sort of hoodoo curse, but that out there?” Dean let out a whistle. “That was definitely a spirit.”

Sam handed her a glass of whiskey before sitting down next to me.

Susan stared. “You’re insane.”

“Yeah, it’s been said.” Dean hummed.

I shifted in my seat, trying to straighten my leg out. “Look, I’m sorry, Susan, but we don’t exactly have time to ease you into this. We need to know when your mother had the stroke.”

“What does that have to do-”

“Just answer the question.” Sam cut her off.

“Uh, about a month ago.”

“Right before the killings began.” Sam mumbled before looking at me and Dean. “See? So what if Rose was working hoodoo, but not to hurt anyone. To protect them.”

I sighed. “She was using the five-spots to ward off the spirit.”

“Right.” Sam nodded. “Until she had a stroke and she couldn’t anymore.”

“I don’t believe this.” Susan shook her head.

“Listen, sister, that car didn’t try to run you down by itself, okay? I mean, I guess it did, technically, but, but the spirit can… forget it.”

“Look, you can believe whatever you the fuck you want to. But the fact is that you and your family are in danger. Okay? So you need to clear everyone out of here. Your employees, your mother, your kids, everyone.”

“Uh… I only have one daughter.”

Sam squinted. “One?”

“I thought Tyler had a sister named Maggie?” Dean tilted his head.

Susan scoffed. “Maggie’s imaginary.”

Sam’s jaw twitched, Dean’s eyebrows furrowed, and I buried my hands in my head.

“Mother fucker.”

“Where’s Tyler?”

Susan’s eyes went wide before she bolted. We scrambled over each other’s feet, following her up the stairs and to her private room. She struggled with the door before pushing it open.

“Tyler!”

The floor was littered with broken dolls. Sam and Dean gave each other a look.

“Oh my god. Tyler!” Susan ran through another door, calling for her daughter.

I ducked, checking under furniture as the boys tore through the closets. Susan came back, running.

“She’s not here!”

“Okay, okay. Susan. Susan.” Sam grabbed her by the shoulders. “Tell us what you know about Maggie.”

“Um, not much. Tyler’s been talking about her ever since Mom got sick.”

“Okay, did you ever know anyone by that name?”

“Uh, no!”

“Think, think.” Dean pressured. “I mean, somebody that could’ve lived here?”

“Maybe someone who passed away?” I offered.

“Oh my god.” Susan’s face drained of color. “My mom. My mom had a sister named Margaret. She barely spoke about her.”

The three of us shared a look.

“Did Margaret happen to die here when she was a kid?”

“Yeah, she drowned in the pool.”

Dean made a face as he began to move. “Come on.”

***

Dean ran ahead, and Sam and I followed, Susan only a few steps behind. The dead garden seemed more eerie now than it had before. Sam reached the door first, trying to unlock it. It didn’t budge. Tyler was on the edge of the balcony inside, only a slip away from falling into the pool.

“Tyler!” Susan called.

Dean and Sam pounded on the glass, trying to break it.

“Mommy!” Tyler squealed.

She fell in with a scream.

“Tyler!”

“Is there another entrance?” Dean asked.

“Around back.”

“Okay, come on.” Dean pulled Susan away before turning to us. “Keep working.”

Sam and I continued to elbow the door, and I let out a grunt as I slammed my shoulder against the frame. It didn’t budge. Sam groaned, looking around. He stopped before grabbing something. He pushed me aside before slamming a pot into the door. The glass began to crack, and Sam began to work harder. He finally got through, the door shattering. He jammed himself through and, without hesitation, leapt over the railing, into the pool.

“Sam!” I squeaked as I ran in, leaning over the railing.

He wasted no time pushing past the plastic cover. I watched as he swam toward Tyler before scooping her up in his arms. I bolted down the steps, reaching his side. I pulled Tyler from his arms and set her down on her side. Sam clambered out of the pool as Dean and Susan burst in. I patted Tyler’s back, and she coughed. Sam helped me push her up to sit, and Susan pulled her into a bear hug.

“Mommy.” She whined.

“Yeah, baby. I’m here. I’m right here.” Susan cried.

“Tyler, do you see Maggie anywhere?” Sam gave her sympathetic eyes.

“No, she’s gone.” She snuggled back into Susan. “Mommy.”

***

“Don’t worry, honey, we’re leaving in two minutes. We’ve just got to get Grandma.” Susan cooed as she held Tyler against her side, moving up the stairs.

“I don’t get it.” Dean hissed. “Did Maggie just stop?”

“Seems like it.” Sam shrugged, hair dripping.

“Well, where the hell did she go?” I asked.

Susan screamed from upstairs. Sam reacted first, bolting up the steps. Dean and I followed. Sam busted through the door. Susan was holding Tyler against her side, crying. The three of us sighed when we saw Rose slumped in her wheelchair.

She was dead.

***

“Paramedics said it was another stroke. Do you think… Margaret could’ve had something to do with it?” Susan asked.

“We don’t know.” Dean shrugged.

“But, it’s possible.” I followed up, tugging on Jinx’s leash so that she would sit.

Sam sighed. “Susan, I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “You have nothing to apologize for. You’ve given me everything.”

Tyler came down the steps, dressed in regular clothing. She had a small smile on her face as she joined her mother. Susan rubbed her back, and Tyler bent down to pet Jinx.

“Ready to go, kiddo?”

“Yeah.”

“Now, Tyler.” Dean bent down to be eye-level with her. “You’re sure Maggie’s not around anymore?”

“I’m sure.” Tyler nodded. “I’d see her.”

“I guess whatever’s going on must be over.” Dean shrugged as we followed Susan down the steps, to her taxi.

Sam held the door open for her, and Susan ushered Tyler into the cab.

“You two take care of yourselves, alright?”

Susan turned and pulled Sam into a hug, resting her head on his chest. Dean snorted, and I wheezed, pulling on a serious face and rubbing my nose when Susan pulled back.

“Thank you.” She looked at Sam, then at Dean and I. “All of you.”

We nodded as she shuffled into the taxi. Sam shut the door behind her and I laughed, covering my mouth.

“Dude, you could’ve just gotten some total MILF action.” I giggled as we began to walk.

“Ew, Ollie-”

“No, seriously, bud, I think she liked you.”

“Yeah.” Sam scoffed. “That’s all she needs.”

“Well, you saved the mom, saved the girl.” I patted Sam’s arm. “Not a bad day, bubs.”

“Course, I could’ve saved them myself, but I didn’t want you to feel useless.” Dean teased.

My heart sank as I remembered what Sam had said last night.

“Appreciate it.” Sam gave Dean a bitch face.

He sensed my shift in attitude and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, tugging me into his side.

“Feels good getting back in the saddle. Doesn’t it?” Dean grinned and pulled out the car keys.

“Yeah.” Sam sighed. “Yeah, it does.” He took his arm back and braced his hands against the top of the car. “But it doesn’t change what we talked about last night, Dean.”

My chest clenched and tears immediately welled in my eyes. I looked down and away, taking a shaky breath. I opened the back door and let Jinx settle in.

“We talked about a lot of things last night.” Dean tried to change the subject.

“You know what I mean.” Sam shook his head.

“You were wasted.” Dean scowled.

“But you weren’t. And you promised.” Sam shot back.

They looked at each other for a beat. Sam pulled the passenger door open first, and I slid into the middle seat, wrapping my arms around myself. Sam got in, slamming the door shut as Dean closed his, gently.

He started the car and glanced Sam’s way. Sam kept his eyes straight ahead as we pulled away from the inn.

Previous Ep: Hunted (2.10)

Next Ep: Nightshifter (2.12)

taglist: @i67

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rosieshipper · 4 years

Text

The mother of Evangeline

Summary: Rose has been a single mother for almost a year. After her ex left her shortly before she gave birth, she was forced to raise her daughter, Evangeline, alone. After moving back to her home to New York, she bumps into some old friends of hers

Rose yawned softly as she walked into the small coffee shop. She had just dropped off her daughter at daycare and was planning on grabbing some coffee before she headed into work. As she stood in line, she could feel herself starting to nod off. Evangeline kept her up all night the night before with her crying. It wasn’t until around four a.m. that she finally went to sleep.

Rose’s head suddenly snapped up when she felt a tap on her shoulder. When she looked up, she saw that the line ahead had gotten shorter. “Shit, I must be holding up the line.” She thought to herself. Quickly stepping ahead, she stopped behind the guy in front of her. Trying her best to rub the sleepiness out of her eyes, Rose walked up to the counter when it was her turn.

“Hi, I would like a-“ Rose was suddenly cut off by a familiar voice. “Rose? Is that you?” Looking up, her eyes locked with some old familiar brown ones. “John?” She whispered in shock. “Holy shit! Look at you! It’s been so long!” John exclaimed with a wide grin on his face. Rose smiled a little at his outburst. “Still as rowdy and cheerful as we were in high school.” She thought.

“Hey listen, I’m about to go on break, we should chat then. Sound good?” John grinned at her to which she nodded with a small smile of her own. After she ordered her drink and paid for it, she walked over to a small table in the corner of the cafe and waited. A few minutes later, John walked up to her table with her drink in hand. “One large vanilla coffee, my dear.” John grinned as he handed her her drink. “Thanks John.” She smiled as she took a sip.

“So what are you doing back in New York? Are you visiting?” John asked first and foremost as he sat down across from her. As he sat, he took in her features. She looked different from the last time he saw her. She looked more tired and may have gained a little bit of weight, not that he was judging her. In other words, it looked like she had been through something big. “No, no. I’m here to stay.” Rose told him, taking another sip of her coffee.

“What? I thought you were moving to Vermont with Charles.” John looked at her in confusion. Rose scoffed almost disgustedly at the mention of her boyfriend. “Yeah, that’s what I thought too.” She sighed, looking down at the table. “What happened?” John asked softly, a concerned look on his face. Rose contemplated telling him what happened or not, but in the end she just sighed before taking a big swig of her coffee.

“A few months after I moved in with Charles, he… he uh.. knocked me up.” Rose started, cringing as she remembered the experience. When she looked at John’s face, she saw that he was starting to get a little angry. Rose knew that he never liked her boyfriend and she could now see why. “A few weeks after that, I found that I was pregnant. I thought everything would be okay after that. But maybe a month before I was due to give birth, he just… up and left me.” Rose looked down at the table as she hissed out the words.

“The fuckbag did what?” John growled, a look of hatred on his face. “He left me. Just packed his bags one night and left me in our apartment. Turns out that he was seeing someone else the entire time I was pregnant. He just decided that she was better than me.” Rose sighed, running a tired hand through her hair. “I am gonna kill that shitstick.” John cursed, malice in his words. “Don’t bother, he’s not worth your time and effort. Besides, I already got back at him.” Rose hummed, taking another swig of her coffee.

“What did you do?” John asked her with a raised eyebrow. “Told his parents what he did. And they believed me.” Rose grinned a little at the look on John’s face. “That’s my girl!” He laughed loudly. “So what happened after that?” He asked her after he calmed down. “Well a month later, I gave birth to a beautiful little girl. I named her Evangeline after my late grandmother.” Rose smiled softly as she recalled the night of her daughter’s birth.

“I tried to make ends meet after that. I was working two jobs just so I could be able to pay bills and be able to feed myself. But after nearly five months, I couldn’t handle it anymore. After our lease was up, I packed all my things into my car and drove me and my daughter all the way back to New York.” Rose explained to John as she looked up at him. “Wow, that must have been so much for you to go through. Where are you living now?” John asked, resting his elbows on the table. “In a one bedroom apartment somewhere downtown. I got a job at a local goodwill and I drop Evangeline off at a daycare every morning before I go to work.” Rose explained before finishing off her coffee.

“Wait shit!” She suddenly exclaimed before looking at the clock on her phone. “Shit, I’m sorry John, I have to go. I have to be at work in ten minutes.” She apologized as she gathered her things. “Hey, it’s alright. Listen, do you need any help? You know with you and your daughter?” John asked as he stood up from his chair. Rose looked at him for a moment before sighing a little. “I think I could use a little help. We can meet up at the daycare and talk more then?” Rose offered as she wrote down the address of the daycare on a small piece of paper and giving it to John.

“Of course, we’ll be there.” John smiled and nodded as he took the paper. “We’ll?” Rose asked, raising a brow at him. “Yep! Don’t think I’m not keeping your other three best friends from seeing you.” He grinned at her. “You mean, Alex, Laf, and Herc?” Rose smiled a little as she remembered John’s boyfriends and her best friends. “Yep, they’ll be ecstatic to see you again.” John said cheerfully. Rose chuckled softly before grabbing her bag. “I can’t wait. I’ll see you around five John.” She called, waving goodbye as she walked out the door. “See you then!” John called as he waved back.

Rose’s body ached as she drove to the daycare. That day had been particularly rough for her. She had to deal with four rude customers and had to be alone for most of her shift. She was just glad that she could finally pick up her daughter and go home. When she pulled into the daycare’s parking lot, her heart almost jumped into her throat when she saw them. John, Alex, Lafayette, and Hercules standing by their car, talking to each other.

Pulling up into the parking spot behind them, Rose stopped her car and stepped out, closing the door behind her. The first thing she heard was Alex’s exciting call. “There she is!” Next thing she knew, Rose was almost knocked over when she was suddenly hugged by Alex. When the initial shock melted away, Rose smiled and hugged him back. But then a few seconds later she was being hugged on all sides by all four guys. “I missed you all so so much.” Rose whispered with a small smile on her face, she even found herself starting to tear up a little.

“We missed you too, mon ange.” Laf smiled down at her. “I’m guessing John told you guys everything?” Rose hummed, looking at them all. “Yep, and I just wanna say this before we go into the daycare, fuck your ex.” Alex told her as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Leave it to you, Alex, to make a nasty comment about my shitty ex.” Rose laughed softly. “Alright, enough fooling around, we gotta head inside and get the little tyke.” Hercules told them all. Rose nodded in agreement and started heading inside.

Once they were all inside, Rose walked up to the front desk. Her sister, Eliza, was behind the desk. Just before Rose moved away with Charles, her sister opened up a daycare. Rose knew how much this job meant to her, she loved children. “Hi Rose.” Eliza smiled when she saw her. “I’m guessing you’re here for Evangeline?” She hummed. “Yep, I sure am.” Rose smiled back at her.

Eliza smiled and led her back into the nursery while the boys waited by the door. A few minutes later, Rose came back with her child in her arms. She said her goodbyes to Eliza and walked out to the parking lot with the boys. “Oh my god, she is just the cutest little thing.” Alex gushed softly as he looked at Evangeline. “Do you guys want to hold her?” Rose offered, readjusting Evangeline in her arms. “Yes! Absolutely!” Alex beamed, a wide grin on his face.

Rose laughed before gently placing Evangeline in Alex’s arms. All the others boys immediately crowded around Alex, talking and cooing at Evangeline in soft and high pitched voices. The gesture only made Rose’s heart swell with happiness. Rose wouldn’t admit this that day, but she always had a secret crush on the four boys since they were in high school together. She thought she didn’t have a chance with them in high school so she didn’t tell how she felt so she ended up getting with Charles. And now seeing the four boys fawn over her little daughter made those feelings resurface.

“Hey, why don’t you guys come over for dinner? I can fix us all up a nice meal.” Rose offered to them. Hercules looked over at her. “Are you sure, Rose?” He asked her as he walked over to her with Evangeline in his arms, handing her back. Rose nodded as she took her daughter into her arms. “Of course. It’s my treat.” She smiled at him before walking over to her car and placing Evangeline in her car seat.

After a bit of driving, Rose made it to her apartment building, the boys right behind her. Walking inside with them, Rose led them to her small apartment. “Please don’t mind the mess, I haven’t really had a chance to clean around here.” Rose told them as she walked inside. To say the apartment was small was an understatement. The first room they were in was a mixture of the kitchen and the living room. There were only two other doors on the back wall, which they assumed were the bathroom and Rose’s bedroom.

“Go ahead and make yourselves comfortable, I’ll get started on dinner.” Rose hummed as she placed Evangeline in her playpen in the living room. “And would you mind keeping an eye on her?” She asked as she walked into the kitchen. “Of course, Rosie.” Alex smiled at her before walking over and sitting on the couch with his boyfriends.

Rose got started on dinner while the boys were busy playing with Evangeline or watching TV. As Rose went about cooking, she found herself messing up more so than usual. She was just trying to make spaghetti and garlic bread. But she ended up burning the bread, overflowing the pasta and the sauce ended up getting everywhere. Rose was a mess. She was trying her best to try and remake dinner, but she ended up slipping on some water on the floor, spilling pasta sauce all over her and the floor. Hercules and Lafayette came running in when they heard the clatter.

“Rose! Are you okay?” Herc exclaimed as he ran over and helped her stand up. “I’m sorry guys, I tried to make us a nice dinner and I just kept messing it up. I’m so sorry.” Rose whimpered, her voice cracking as tears slid down her cheeks. “Non, Non mon ange. It’s okay.” Laf told her softly, a sympathetic look in his eyes. “Listen, you go and jump in the shower, me and Laf will clean up, and John and Alex can order us all some pizza. Sounds good?” Herc hummed, his hands on her shoulders.

Rose nodded and sniffed, wiping away her tears. “Thanks guys. I would hug you right now but as you can see I’m covered in pasta sauce.” She joked. They all laughed and Rose went to go take her shower. Around thirty minutes later, Rose walked out into the living room. Herc and Laf were still cleaning in the kitchen but Alex and John were sitting on the floor playing with Evangeline. Alex had her on his lap while John was playing a game of peek a boo with her. The sound of her loud giggling warmed Rose’s heart.

“Hey Rose.” Alex smiled up at her as she walked over and sat down next to them on the floor. “Hey, what are you three up to?” She asked with a smile. “Oh nothing, just playing around with this cutie pie here.” Alex grinned, blowing a small raspberry on her cheek and making her laugh. Rose smiled warmly at the three of them, her heart fluttering with warmth. God she was so in love with these boys. They’ve been more nice to her in a few hours then Charles was in two years. Rose decided inside her head that she’d tell them how she felt after she put Evangeline down for the night.

About half an hour later, the pizza arrived and they all started to eat. Half way through dinner though, Evangeline started to get fussy. Standing up from the couch, Rose picked her up and carried her into the kitchen to get her a bottle. Grabbing a bottle from the fridge, she placed it into the microwave to warm it up a little bit. As she stood there, lightly bouncing Evangeline as she cried softly, Rose looked over when Laf walked in.

“Here, mon ange. Let me feed her.” He offered as he walked over to her. “No, it’s alright Laf. I can feed her.” Rose told him, shaking her head. “You need to eat. You’ve been so busy taking care of your daughter that you hardly have time to take care of yourself.” He told her softly. “Please let us help you.” Rose sighed softly before gently handing Evangeline to him. “There we go, there’s mon petit agneau.” Laf smiled down at Evangeline.

Rose sighed softly as she walked back out to the living room and joined the other boys on the couch. The three of them talked for a bit before Laf eventually came back into the room, Evangeline still cradled in his arms as he sat down next to Rose. The five of them chatted and mused about old high school memories before Rose eventually stood up again, Evangeline in her arms. “Alright boys. I’m gonna change her and lay her down for the night. I’ll be right back.” She hummed. “Mind if I come, Rose?” She looked back when Hercules stood up. She smiled warmly at him and nodded.

The two of them walked into Rose’s bedroom and she gently laid Evangeline on her bed. Herc kept Evangeline preoccupied while Rose grabbed a new diaper and some pajamas. Walking back over to the bed, Rose began taking off her daughter’s onesie and began to change her. Once she was fully changed and in her new pjs, Rose picked her up and grabbed a pacifier off her bedside table, popping into Evangeline’s mouth.

“You know, Rose, you’re a really good mom.” Herc hummed as he watched her lay Evangeline down in her crib. “Heh, no I’m not. Half of the time I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be doing. I’m winging it most of the time.” Rose said softly, shaking her head. “But you are. Look at Evangeline. She’s perfectly happy and healthy. You may not think you’re a good mom but we’ve all seen it here tonight. You put your daughter before anything else. You are a wonderful mom.” Herc told her softly, pulling her into a hug.

Rose felt her heart race as she hugged him back. “Thank you, Herc.” She whispered. The two of them slipped out of the room quietly once Evangeline was fast asleep. Rose could feel her heartbeat kick into overdrive, it was showtime. Following Herc back into the living room, Rose watched as Herc sat down on the couch. “It’s now or never.” Rose thought to herself before sighing quietly.

“Boys, can I talk to you about something important?” She asked them. “Of course, Rosie, go ahead.” John smiled warmly at her. Rose let out a quiet shaky sigh. “Well, for starters, I want to thank you all for helping me out today. You all have been so kind to me and it’s the most kindness I’ve felt in the past two years. You four really make me feel so special.” She whispered firstly, her eyes already tearing up a little. “And I want to tell you all something I never had the courage to tell you in high school. After seeing you all interact with my daughter today, I realized how I truly feel. I..I-I love you. All four of you. I love you all so so so much. And I want you keep helping me raise Evangeline. She’ll never know her real horrible father, but I want her to look at all of you and see you all as wonderful fathers in her life.” Rose finished her speech with tears rolling down her cheeks.

All four boys were quiet for a moment, making Rose’s heart ram against her chest with anxiety. Suddenly, John stood up and walked up to her. Without saying a word, he leaned in and kissed her lips softly, making her gasp. “You have no idea how long we’ve waited for you to say those words.” John whispered as he slowly pulled away. “W-What?” Rose stammered, her cheeks red as she looked up at him. “We’ve felt the same way about you since high school, darling.” Alex told her as he walked up beside John and kissed her cheek. “Y-You did?” Rose blushed deeply at their sudden affection. “Oui, mon ange. But when you announced that you were with Charles, we wanted you to be happy, so we didn’t tell you.” Laf explained as she walked up beside her, taking her hand and kissing her temple lovingly. Herc stood up lastly and hugged Rose from behind. “We would absolutely love to raise Evangeline with you, princess.” He whispered, kissing her shoulder.

Rose let out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding. She then allowed herself to freely cry for the first time in what felt like forever. “I love you guys so much.” She said with a true smile on her face. “We love you too.” The boys said in unison.

Tags: @aricka-and-her-fictional-others @astralshipper @kittyselfships @nougatships

#otp: my boys #poly hamilsquad #hamilton #self ship #self ship community #self shipping #alexander hamilton #john laurens #marquis de lafayette #lafayette #hercules mulligan #just a neat little single mother au i came up with when i listened to this song #Spotify

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riichardwilson · 4 years

Text

Google’s search terms move will make millions in ad spend invisible to advertisers

This morning, I negated a word that cost a campaign more than $3 for the one click it received in a brand campaign last week. I didn’t add the whole query, just one irrelevant word that triggered a brand keyword. Going forward, I might not ever see that type word or know if it showed up across multiple low-volume queries.

As we reported yesterday, Google has notified advertisers the search terms report will “only include terms that were searched by a significant number of users.” It has given no details about what “significant” means. The company told us the reason for the change is “to maintain our standards of privacy and strengthen our protections around user data.”

Unsurprisingly, the move has angered advertisers.

Is it too much to ask that they define “significant” and give some sort of acknowledgement to what this does to the people who work in the platform daily?

I may not make a huge impact, but I can direct spend off their platform.

— Amalia Fowler (@amaliaefowler) September 3, 2020

To be clear, maintaining and respecting user privacy should be a priority for tech companies like Google as well as for marketers. Google should keep personally identifiable information (PII) and otherwise sensitive queries that could be tied to someone out of search terms reports and it’s other platforms (the amount of PII that gets passed through to Analytics is a topic for another day). But, Google’s oblique communication about this change has left the door open for skepticism about its motives.

The “not provided” privacy issue is nearly a decade old

Next fall will be the 10th anniversary of “not provided.” Google started limiting visibility into the search terms that drive organic traffic to websites in 2011 for users logged into Google, again citing privacy. The so-called “not provided” issue (how that traffic appears in Analytics reports) has frustrated site owners ever since. For whatever reason — Google’s never been clear about it — the company has continued to surface that data to advertisers in the search terms report.

Is it hypocritical and self-serving to give this data to advertisers and not to others if privacy is behind the decision? It’s hard to deny. Limiting search term data would have undoubtedly hurt Google’s ad business, though advertisers have had a pretty good argument that they’re paying for the clicks and should have access to be able to eliminate wasted ad spend and optimize their campaigns. When “not provided” happened, keyword buying was the only way to buy search ads, and the way keywords matched to search queries was relatively straightforward.

So why make this change to ad search terms now?

We don’t have clear answers on why now. Google’s not saying.

We can either take Google’s statement at face value:

That there was suddenly a privacy epiphany about this data, or that there were enough specific scenarios detected to raise attention, or that this is a reaction to the increase in data privacy regulation and anti-trust scrutiny. We don’t know if there was a specific trigger. GDPR went into effect in 2018. CCPA went into effect Jan. 1 of this year, enforcement started Jul. 1. We know Google had CCPA on its radar because it introduced its solution for advertisers last November (unlike Facebook which waited until July).

Or we can be more skeptical:

Google isn’t providing responses to follow up questions we’ve asked. Regardless of Google’s intentions, there are millions, if not billions, of dollars in ad spend reflected in this longtail data. It’s no wonder advertisers are looking for more answers and clearer communication.

Last quarter, Google’s Search business was hit hard by advertisers pulling back amid the pandemic. The company generated $21.3 billion from Search and other properties such as Maps, a 10% drop year-over-year. (Total revenues were off 8%, marking the company’s first year-over-year decline.) I’d like to think this isn’t a revenue-incentivized decision, and it is certainly reflective of the trend toward automation (more on that later), but it’s nearly impossible not to view this kind of decision, at least in part, though this lens.

Does this longtail search query data really matter? What’s the big deal if a keyword only ever gets one click?

All that data adds up to big money and important insights for advertisers. Based on what some are seeing, advertisers could lose visibility into the search terms that account for a quarter or more of their ad spend.

There’s this:

I’m going to flip what @sengineland‘s @GinnyMarvin suggested in the email this morning. Don’t look at search terms with CLICKS <5. Look at IMPRESSIONS <5. I filtered impressions <2 for the past 14 days; 35.44% of my spend came from those terms. #ppcchat

— Eric Heiken (@EricHeiken) September 3, 2020

And this:

It is entirely possible that we’re losing data for at least 51% of ad spend. At a minimum it’s going to be at least 30% of ad spend.

Google taking this data away from us will have an absolutely staggering impact on accounts big and small.

This is an absolutely outrageous.

— Collin Slattery (@CJSlattery) September 2, 2020

Digital agency Seer looked at the initial impact of this change and calculated that Google Ads now “hides search terms for ~28% of paid search budgets and removes search term visibility of 20.4% of PPC clicks.” Meaning:

For every $100K you spend on Google search, you get search term data for $71,000 of it.

For every 100K clicks you get, you see search term data for 77,900 of those clicks.

Source: Seer

The irrelevant word that showed up in that $3 search term I negated this morning could be sprinkled across many other low-volume (again, we don’t know what the threshold is) search terms and make a substantial dent in that company’s marketing agency budget. And, nobody would be the wiser.

The implications for small businesses, in particular, are huge.

Moving away from keywords — All aboard the ML train

Search advertising was built on keyword targeting. Then came Facebook and it’s audience targeting power with pinpoint “people-based marketing agency” capabilities.

And at the same time there have been massive advancements in machine learning and AI.

Google has subsequently marched toward audience targeting and away from keyword targeting, diluting match types and introducing campaign types that don’t use keywords at all. As I wrote last year, when Google extended same-meaning close variants to phrase and broad match modified keywords:

The days of zero-keyword search campaigns have long been predicted as machine learning has taken over and audiences have come into play. In fact, those days are already here with automated campaign types such as Local campaigns, Smart campaigns and App campaigns.

https://searchengineland.com/is-Google-prepping-to-phase-out-etas-339964A more recent example of this shift to machine-learning powered audiences: In July, Google introduced audiences based on new predicted purchase and churn metrics in Google Analytics. (On the ads front, Google is making its automated responsive search ad format the default in a current test.)

This requires more trust than Google has earned

I’m no Luddite when it comes to automation, machine learning and AI. If it means better results and less work, bring it on. But, we aren’t at a point where marketers can take our hands entirely off the steering wheel.

Let’s say we put aside the argument that advertisers should have access to (non-PII) search query data because they are paying Google for those clicks. For advertisers to be remotely comfortable with this change, they need to trust that the algorithms that match query intent to keywords are as good as Google would like us to believe they are.

No doubt, the algorithms are getting better. But, the proof that they are far from perfect is in … those search terms reports.

Google hasn’t said this, but I can imagine the response now: “Our data show that .000001% of advertisers actually act on that data and add negative keywords.”

Whatever the number, it doesn’t matter.

What’s next?

“We’re continuing to invest in new and efficient ways to share insights that enable advertisers to make critical business decisions,” Google said in its statement to us. We’ll have to wait to see what this means.

In the meantime, advertisers will continue to feel like they’re yelling into the void. This move also potentially squanders the goodwill the company garnered by issuing ads credits to businesses hurt by the pandemic. As we head into the critical fourth quarter, more critical than ever given the pandemic, advertisers will be forced to navigate without visibility into a sizeable share of their ad spend — or look elsewhere.

About The Author

Ginny Marvin is Third Door Media’s Editor-in-Chief, running the day to day editorial operations across all publications and overseeing paid media coverage. Ginny Marvin writes about paid digital advertising and analytics news and trends for Search Engine Land, marketing agency Land and MarTech Today. With more than 15 years of marketing agency experience, Ginny has held both in-house and agency management positions. She can be found on Twitter as @ginnymarvin.

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/googles-search-terms-move-will-make-millions-in-ad-spend-invisible-to-advertisers/ source https://scpie.tumblr.com/post/628322108149235712

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scpie · 4 years

Text

Google’s search terms move will make millions in ad spend invisible to advertisers

Unsurprisingly, the move has angered advertisers.

Is it too much to ask that they define “significant” and give some sort of acknowledgement to what this does to the people who work in the platform daily?

I may not make a huge impact, but I can direct spend off their platform.

— Amalia Fowler (@amaliaefowler) September 3, 2020

The “not provided” privacy issue is nearly a decade old

So why make this change to ad search terms now?

We don’t have clear answers on why now. Google’s not saying.

We can either take Google’s statement at face value:

Or we can be more skeptical:

Does this longtail search query data really matter? What’s the big deal if a keyword only ever gets one click?

There’s this:

— Eric Heiken (@EricHeiken) September 3, 2020

And this:

It is entirely possible that we’re losing data for at least 51% of ad spend. At a minimum it’s going to be at least 30% of ad spend.

Google taking this data away from us will have an absolutely staggering impact on accounts big and small.

This is an absolutely outrageous.

— Collin Slattery (@CJSlattery) September 2, 2020

For every $100K you spend on Google search, you get search term data for $71,000 of it.

For every 100K clicks you get, you see search term data for 77,900 of those clicks.

Source: Seer

The implications for small businesses, in particular, are huge.

Moving away from keywords — All aboard the ML train

Search advertising was built on keyword targeting. Then came Facebook and it’s audience targeting power with pinpoint “people-based marketing agency” capabilities.

And at the same time there have been massive advancements in machine learning and AI.

This requires more trust than Google has earned

No doubt, the algorithms are getting better. But, the proof that they are far from perfect is in … those search terms reports.

Google hasn’t said this, but I can imagine the response now: “Our data show that .000001% of advertisers actually act on that data and add negative keywords.”

Whatever the number, it doesn’t matter.

What’s next?

About The Author

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/googles-search-terms-move-will-make-millions-in-ad-spend-invisible-to-advertisers/

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laurelkrugerr · 4 years

Text

Google’s search terms move will make millions in ad spend invisible to advertisers

Unsurprisingly, the move has angered advertisers.

Is it too much to ask that they define “significant” and give some sort of acknowledgement to what this does to the people who work in the platform daily?

I may not make a huge impact, but I can direct spend off their platform.

— Amalia Fowler (@amaliaefowler) September 3, 2020

The “not provided” privacy issue is nearly a decade old

So why make this change to ad search terms now?

We don’t have clear answers on why now. Google’s not saying.

We can either take Google’s statement at face value:

Or we can be more skeptical:

Does this longtail search query data really matter? What’s the big deal if a keyword only ever gets one click?

There’s this:

— Eric Heiken (@EricHeiken) September 3, 2020

And this:

It is entirely possible that we’re losing data for at least 51% of ad spend. At a minimum it’s going to be at least 30% of ad spend.

Google taking this data away from us will have an absolutely staggering impact on accounts big and small.

This is an absolutely outrageous.

— Collin Slattery (@CJSlattery) September 2, 2020

For every $100K you spend on Google search, you get search term data for $71,000 of it.

For every 100K clicks you get, you see search term data for 77,900 of those clicks.

Source: Seer

The implications for small businesses, in particular, are huge.

Moving away from keywords — All aboard the ML train

Search advertising was built on keyword targeting. Then came Facebook and it’s audience targeting power with pinpoint “people-based marketing agency” capabilities.

And at the same time there have been massive advancements in machine learning and AI.

This requires more trust than Google has earned

No doubt, the algorithms are getting better. But, the proof that they are far from perfect is in … those search terms reports.

Google hasn’t said this, but I can imagine the response now: “Our data show that .000001% of advertisers actually act on that data and add negative keywords.”

Whatever the number, it doesn’t matter.

What’s next?

About The Author

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/googles-search-terms-move-will-make-millions-in-ad-spend-invisible-to-advertisers/ source https://scpie1.blogspot.com/2020/09/googles-search-terms-move-will-make.html

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oldnintendonerd · 7 years

Text

Pickup post #4 - It’s Sony weeks

So the last couple weeks were slow after the last GameCube find at work. Very slow, so much so I didn’t even find anything else Nintendo related. I am talking to someone about a GameCube game on OfferUp, so we’ll see how that goes. There is also a possible small NES and Game Boy game lot from another co-worker that is in discussion. So I have some things simmering, hopefully I’ll have something more to post about soon, but no more Nintendo finds. Everything I found in the last couple weeks was at a Goodwill, and was Sony related.

I have no problem with this, while not really collecting for Playstation per se, I do have some fond memories of playing many Playstation games growing up. Twisted Metal 2 was fantastic both one player and two player. I would play with friends, my dad, my brother, it’s just a great game. The sound effect you get when you get a kill is so satisfying. Will never get old.

Another series of games I spent a ton of time with was the Gran Turismo series. I had the original one first, as most did, and really enjoyed the experience. Starting from the bottom, buying cars, winning races, upgrading your cars or buying new ones and moving up the ladder. I eventually bought the second one and enjoyed it just as much. Essentially a racing game RPG.

All three of the items I’m going into now were picked up across the end of the month of May, and the first week or so of June. I was hitting dozens of garage and yard sales, combing OfferUp and LetGo. Nothing. I literally hit at least 12 yard sales in an hour span one day and got “Nope, my son took all those” as an answer at 3 of them when asked if they had any older video games.

This was why I couldn’t pass it up when I spotted Gran Turismo 4 on the PS2 at a Goodwill. Just needed to get something, anything to have a find at this point, and I was so fond of the first two. So I bought it. I don’t even have a PS2.

This game is near mint. Only a couple minor dings on the outer case, still very shiny. Manual is in very good condition, and the disc looks like it’s never been taken out of the case.

Snagged this one for $2.99.

Just immaculate condition, I was stunned for a $3 game sitting in a thrift store. I mean just look at the disc, look at it! Absolutely pristine.

I’ll be honest, I’ve never been a huge fan of the PS2, even badmouthed it on numerous occasions. Maybe even right here in this blog saying I’d never collect for it. It all stemmed from when I played Twisted Metal Black back in 2001, and the steering for driving in reverse was backwards from the first 4 games on the PS1. I loved those games. However, on Black I got so frustrated going the wrong way every time I tried to back up. I’d try to turn one way, the car would go the other and screw up what I was trying to do. Did you ever see those videos of the guy trying to learn how to ride a bike when the steering is inverted? It’s a Smarter Every Day episode. Click here if you are curious. Essentially what it comes down to is muscle memory. You’ve done something so much you now no longer THINK about having to do it, you just do it. While not as complicated as riding a bike, doing a rookie turn in Twisted Metal was something I’d done over and over again. It was automatic. Having it reversed, completely broke the game for me to the point where I almost couldn’t function. I know backing up is maybe 20% of the time in that game, but that still puts me at 80% effectiveness, because I was useless backing up. You have to be able to move in reverse, and aim at the same time. Not easy with steering opposite from everything you’ve known for the last 5 or 6 years in a series.

It crushed my love of the Twisted Metal series. The developers completely ruined the game with one simple direction change that was counter intuitive. Turned me off completely. Never had a desire to buy a PS2 after that. Because that was the ONE game at the time I was anticipating on the system.

Now though, heh...

In the thick of a retro gaming hunt, I figured there was a real possibility I could eventually get one, if for nothing else, to play my old PS1 games, and test any PS1 or PS2 games I pick up and intend to flip. I thought it couldn’t hurt to have a few choice games in the collection for the PS2, it was the best selling game system of all time for a reason.

Don’t get me wrong I am still a Nintendo fan boy at heart, and the vast majority of the content you should see in the blog will still be for Nintendo, but, good games are good games. Might as well enjoy them. If I find a good deal on a system or game that is not Nintendo, I’m going to go for it, whether I intend to sell it or keep it I’ll still post it up here for everyone to read about. Heck, I’d even be willing to give Twisted Metal Black another play if it comes along for cheap. Overall, I am game hunting, and Nintendo is not the only manufacturer and developer of video games. So with that out of the way, on to the next bit of the find.

Next up is Hot Shots Golf 3, I have played the earlier ones on the PS1 back in the day. They are good. Not blowing anyone away, but good fun games.

It is essentially a platform agnostic Mario Golf. So I figured it couldn’t hurt to have. I love my copy of Mario Golf Toadstool Tour. This one reminds me of that a lot, right down to the “Nice Shot!” it says after getting the markers lined up for a swing. When the girl at the Goodwill rings you out at the DVD price of $1.99, instead of the video game price of $2.99, no complaints here either. Especially since it was a little bit of a gamble. Admittedly, because it was pretty scratched. But I didn’t see any real deep ones, so it should play. If it doesn’t, eh, it was $2. Still, it was complete, and in good shape otherwise. Would I have bought it had I not been on a dry spell? Probably not.

Lastly, the Goodwill by my work had a PS1 on the shelf in the electronics section. If you read my blog regularly I have mentioned this one before as being the more robust in the video game department of the two I normally visit. Had the PS1 come into the one by my house it probably would have went in the auction case. If it was cheaper I may have picked it up, but it was a relatively high $14.99. This for a stand alone PS1, just the system, no cables, no games, no included controllers, no guarantee it works, nothing. However, it did have a dual shock 1 controller sitting there with it, with its own price tag of course. The sticks and buttons all felt great, tight and responsive. So I snagged it.

$3.99.

I took it home, cracked it open, and cleaned it up. It was in really good shape under a bit of the grime that was there. I hooked it to my PS1 to USB adapter and tried it with ePSXe on the PC. Works fine. Even the joys don’t have any grooves worn in them or anything. They did have that plastic “dust” under them that comes from use, but it cleaned up and looks fine.

The shoulder buttons are responsive and clean as well. Just an all around good controller. I couldn’t pass it up.

So $9.61 total for two games and a controller.

Apparently Goodwill is charging tax where I live. I’ve seen it be no tax before, but I think it depends completely on the region they are in. Wish it was tax free here, but alas it is not.

Kind of terrible that it took almost a full two weeks of hunting just to come up with that. I’m struggling for content on this blog as far as hunting goes. But, I’ll take what I can get. I’m going to keep at it, I’ll keep hitting yard sales, garage sales, flea markets and thrift stores as often as time allows. Obviously when winter hits, yard and garage sales wont be options. Those will certainly be slower months. Though, to be perfectly honest, I haven’t found anything at a yard sale or garage sale yet, so, what difference do those make, at least thus far? Dozens of sales this season under my belt with not a single find at even one of them. The prices are always much higher on other avenues, like OfferUp or LetGo. Everyone always checks eBay before listing anything, and usually wants close to that number.

The luck I’m having with co-workers and Goodwill I may just stop going to yard/garage sales.

I’m kidding, you won’t know whats there until you get there. So I won’t stop going when the opportunity arises.

Official business:

$11.09 - $9.61 = $1.48 game hunting money remaining.

YIKES!

Knowing we were very low on funds, like critically low, I sold the Game Boy Player from the last find. The auction was running when I bought Hot Shots Golf 3 actually, so I had a plan for funds. Even though we never actually went negative. YAY!

I had to use eBay, I had no other choice. Here’s the completed auction.

As you can see, it sold this weekend and it went for $67.00, plus $3.99 shipping. Totaling $70.99. Ebay is kind of terrible to sell on, you really feel like you get fee’d to death. But it works for quick sales on desirable items. Generally you get a little more than you could do in cash face to face with someone so it evens out somewhat. Not all the way, but somewhat. I figure if I sold this to someone locally for cash, I would get somewhere between $45 and $50 since they will likely want to haggle. On the auction, it sold faster than it would to find a buyer on a local site, and after Paypal took their fees, eBay took their fees, and I shipped it, I actually walked away with $52.88. So a couple bucks more than I figure I would have gotten. It feels like you are getting bent over, but in most cases the prices are higher BECAUSE of how much you get bent over and it sort of evens out. Lets put that back into the game hunting money...

$1.48 + $52.88 = $54.36

Whew! Close one, almost went negative. I mean I don’t mind if we go negative. You can’t know what’s going to happen though, if the right deal comes along, it may force your hand. As long as there is something to sell in that lot, or on hand from a past one to bring it positive again, I’m OK with extending myself some credit if I have to.

$54.36 game hunting money remaining. Happy June guys. Hoping to find something else soon so I can post some more content.

2017.06.14

#sony #playstation #ps2 #ps1 #playstation2 #game hunting #retrogaming #granturismo #granturismo4 #gameboy player #video games

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tundaycapital · 5 years

Text

How We Started Selling on ebay

A few months ago I had the itch to do start something myself that was separate from the normal career path. I listen to a lot of the success type podcasts that led me think I could try and sell things online to make a little extra cash. Initially the goal was to set up a used book business on Amazon. Unfortunately, Amazon didn’t pan out because they revoked my selling privileges for reasons never explained to me after multiple attempts to regain the ability to sell. So after that first blow, I focused my attention on ebay. This business would have to be larger than just books as anything goes on ebay. Reading a bit more into and listening to a few more podcasts, we decided to choose garage sales as our primary source for items. This is because we don’t have a ton of cash and it is actually quite interesting. We never know what we’ll find. The following is a step-by-step guide of sorts for how anyone could do this starting next weekend. It will be similar to more popular ones, but it’s our process nonetheless.

1. Download the Yard Sale Treasure Map App and the Ebay App

This app is a necessity as it sources all listed garage sales from Craigslist and their locations so that you can plan your routes accordingly.

Aside from this app, if you see a sign on a street post, pull over and check it out. At least half of the garage sales we go too are from signs along the route.

2. Go to the Garage Sales

Easier said than done. Back in the day garage sales started at 6AM and everything would be gone if you were late. Nowadays in our local areas the garage sales seem to start around 8 or 9AM and they highly discourage “early birds”. Luckily for all it makes garage sailing much more accessible.

3. Look for Interesting items

This simply means find things that look like they may be worth something. Think of branded clothing (Nike, Levi’s, Lucky Brand, The North Face). These sell well if you are in the right price range, which I will cover further down. Also look for things that you know are valuable or interesting to other people. I know the value of bags and books reasonably well but need my lady for women’s clothing and shoes. If you know the intricacies of toys or purses or anything for that matter then search for those specifically. Be careful with kitchen products as those haven’t been very hot for us.

4. Search the Sold Listings

This part takes time and frankly looks awkward to do at garage sales, but just go for it.

Go to the ebay app on your phone and type in the item description to the best of your knowledge. Be somewhat specific with sizes and colors and brands but not so much styles. Under filter, hit the Sold Listings to on and try to find either the exact item or one similar. See the price range for the item you’re searching for.

When you have a range you’ll need to do a quick mental calculation to determine if it’s even worth buying. If there are no results it is a bad sign, avoid the item unless it is a niche/vintage product you really believe would sell. The formula would go as follows:

Avg. Sold Price(on ebay, including shipping) – Estimated Shipping -Purchase Price = Gross Profit

Estimated Shipping has a large range. $3-6 for books depending on their weight. Otherwise determine how heavy and estimate lighter items to be $6-10 and heavier $10-20, as you can always use a flat rate box if it is too heavy.

The purchase price is up to you. Try to get as low as you can, but be willing to walk away if the owner is being ridiculous. $1 is a favorite, but be willing to pay if the item is worth it.

Example 1: Monopoly: Disney My Villains Collector’s Edition

Avg. Sold Price(including shipping): $60

Purchase Price: $2.99 at the local Goodwill, call it $3

Estimated Shipping: $15

Gross Profit = $60 – $3 – $15= $42

That happened in less than a week as I bought the item only a couple of days before it sold. I knew it would be a hit online since it’s a Disney Collector’s Edition with a little supply on ebay.

The next example will show poorer fortune.

Example 2: Carter’s Baby Jacket

Avg. Sold Price(including shipping): I DIDNT EVEN CHECK, after review 5-12-20, Let’s say $12

Purchase Price: $0.50

Estimated Shipping: $7

Gross Profit = $12 – $0.50 – $7 = $4.50

Unfortunately, things didn’t work out so hot when the item sold and the real numbers came out.

The sale price was 50% lower than I anticipated from the sold comparisons. Shipping was more as well by about 50%. This combined with ebay+paypal fees ended up with us LOSING $5.10. Not the best strategy, but it happens sometimes.

5. Buy it all

Or what you think is most worthwhile.

6. Go home and List.

Open up the ebay app and head to the selling tab, click the list an item button. Type the title of the item. This will take a moment to learn how to be concise yet descriptive. Follow the procedure from there and add photos and a description as best you can. List the item and it is ready to roll.

A quick shortcut to the listing would be to go through Step 4 again but instead click on the item you are selling and a button should be at the top saying sell one like this. Click that and adjust as you need. This saves a little time in crafting the listing.

We keep track of prices, listing and sold items on Google Sheets so we make sure we aren’t losing money.

7. Get paid, but be patient.

Selling doesn’t happen immediately. Some items sell in the same week and some a few months later. We have so far had a 46% net profit margin over the past 3 months, meaning out of the sales we pocket $46 for every $100 sold. This may not sound like a lot but considering many items are bought for $1 or less, the return on investment is phenomenal. Be patient but keep doing this in your free time and you will make some cash on the side.

Here’s a video of random thoughts garage sailing:

youtube

Additional links: https://www.garyvaynerchuk.com/find-easy-products-to-sell-on-ebay/

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thecoroutfitters · 6 years

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Written by R. Ann Parris on The Prepper Journal.

Editors Note: Another article from R. Ann Parris to The Prepper Journal. As always, if you have information for Preppers that you would like to share then enter into the Prepper Writing Contest with a chance to win one of three Amazon Gift Cards with the top prize being a $300 card to purchase your own prepping supplies!

The weather has finally broken for most of North America, which has advantages alone. Fewer bugs and less heat make any work we have to do a little easier and if it hasn’t yet, we’re right on the verge of plants dying down, cutting some of our workload and making getting around a bit easier.

The season has more to offer, though, blessed as many of us find it. From the holidays around the corner to seasonal trends, autumn can give us nice boosts to our preparedness.

We don’t have a lot of time left for Halloween (totally my bad) but some of them will be available through Thanksgiving here in the U.S. Others are based solely in the changing of seasons and we have more time yet.

Straw bales, Corncobs, & Squashes

Autumn means we commonly see some decorations that can help us out, especially if we have livestock. Fewer still do it, but there are still neighborhoods and houses that go all out celebrating harvests and holidays.

Straw bales and stuffing from the porch and dooryard scarecrows are sometimes too far gone for animal bedding, but it can be useful stuff as mulch.

Make sure to spread that straw in walkways or stash it for areas of the lawn that end up boggy and muddy, trails our pets and family tear up, and places we want to re-seed with a cereal or different lawn grass. Straw – like hay – has increasingly been treated with Roundup. The herbicide doesn’t hurt monocots, but it will affect broad leaf plants. That means it’s a no-go for pretty much all our veggie garden areas, just in case.

If people are carving jack o’ lanterns, they may be too far gone Nov. 1 for livestock, but it might be worth a peek. Other decorations may include Indian corn and all those fancy/fugly gourds, though, and those are most likely still good for our critters.

Stash the gourds as long as possible if you have chickens. They can be valuable entertainment as well as fresh foods and the boosts of the mature seeds inside if the birds start developing cabin fever.

Goats can have those gourds smashed or split* and will munch them as well. Most domestic game birds aren’t really grazers, but they’ll happily poke through for the seeds.

*Indulge in fun here: Pop them up to entertain nephews with baseball bats or set up a backstop and lead catch for some target practice.

Corn can be ground or soaked for our critters. Or, we can hang it out piecemeal to keep our future-need squirrel farm going.

We could just drive around and scan for any hanging out of garbage bins, but consider leaving a short note ahead of time if you see those decorations.

“I noticed your lovely decorations, and was wondering what you plan to do with them after the season. I’ll pick them up if you plan to dispose of them,” can be fit on a business card or printed 8-12x on regular letter paper. (Sign it if you print it off – personalization can make a difference.)

If you don’t have a drop phone to give a number, create a generic email just for pop-up contacts. It doesn’t even have to reference preparedness, but it’s a good idea to have one (or twelve) for all kinds of networking.

After-Season Sales

The stores that sell that Indian corn and those gourds will usually drop their prices once they’ve been sitting out a while, and you may be able to ask a clerk when the display is coming down for an idea of when to see if they’ve just been tagged by a distributor/merchandiser and then pitched in a dumpster.

Somewhere approaching or just after Christmas those big bins of mixed nuts will also go on sale.

If you buy butter, your season, too, is coming. Hold out just a little longer and make some room in your freezer, because you may be able to find it for $2-$2.50 a pound again during the big baking seasons.

Finding candy on deep discounts even the day after is pretty rare where I am now, and even decorations and other goodies are getting harder to find with the fast swing between holiday promotions, but your area may be different and online you may find yourself a nice goldmine.

Of all places, Mill’s Fleet Farm has been a crazy good source for post-season sales and feeding somebody’s hard-to-find seasonal favorite for me.

Party supply stores like Oriental Trading Co. also regularly run free shipping promotions with no restrictions on order size and amount, and include discounted items. That runs from inexpensive and cheap (two different things) toys, ornaments, and activities as well as goodies to stash away in canning jars for a bad day.

I also sometimes see those goodies and the seasonal attire, decorations, tableware, candles/lamp oils, and activities at deep discounts in Tuesday Morning type second-chance stores the next week.

Consignment Shops & Classifieds

The change of seasons has a couple of benefits that will reach through to well after Christmas. Here in North America fishing and gardening season is winding down and suppliers sometimes have sales. We may not dive on those, but others do.

Those others sometimes recoup part of an upgrade by selling off their old gear, clothing to bows and reels, ATVs and boats to trailers and tree stands. That can net us supplies for pennies on the dollar.

We might hit flea markets and yard sales for some of those, but keeping an eye on local seller websites and doing quick cruises through Salvation Army, Goodwill, or thrift stores tends to be more productive (unless you just like people, want to get some extra exercise in, or have a dog to socialize – then, go for it all).

We can sometimes luck into really good gear donated solely because it didn’t fit anymore at the start of hunting season or really cold weather, or because a Christmas present led to making extra room.

I tend to keep an eye out specifically for the growing boys’ boots and hunting, camping, packing, and cold-weather gear, but it applies to regular street clothes as well. Some parents also have kids donate some portion of their old clothes and toys after the holiday bonanza, so it’s worth keeping an eye out if you have a little one or a particular interest.

(Thank you Walt!)

Leaves Fall Down

Leaves are a big boost for those of us who can snag them from our own yards and neighbors.

Trees have nice deep roots, see, and all kinds of lovely micro-nutrients end up in those leaves. That makes for a really excellent compost (leaf mold), whether we bag them, add them to heaps/tumblers, or use them as mulches.

We can mow over them with a bagger (or strategically placed tarp or trash can) to get a head start in breaking them down, and they will deliver those nutrients even faster. Chipping or mowing them also makes them even better for use in worm bins and trenches.

Leaves can also help us protect young trees and tender perennials from the coming cold season. Sometimes we can just pile them up. Other times we may want to build a string or mesh cage around larger plants to help keep the leaves exactly where we want them.

In our own yards, leave some strategic piles and light layers here and there. Lots of beneficial insects use them for protection as the weather shifts.

So do slugs, though, which means we have to be mindful of where we use leaves as mulch.

The slugs and bugs are a benefit if we want to make a pile for covering our poultry runs, though. Pretty much all birds are delighted to rifle through leaves (and other mulches) looking for yummy hideouts.

Pre-Pre-Pre-Black Friday & Cyber Week

You won’t get me into a shopping area starting mid-November and I see fewer and fewer online sales that are all that good, but if you need to make a big-ticket purchase, it may be worth making an appearance on the Day(s) of Craze.

Maybe it’s a chipper-shredder to take more advantage of autumn pruning around the home, or maybe it’s the year you’re taking the plunge into solar or a generator. It might be as little as a couple of gas cans using the Harbor Freight coupon, or stocking up on pet food from Tractor Supply. Whatever it is, big or small, sometimes you can really make that trip into madness pay off.

Just stay extra alert for exhausted, drunk, and hungover people rushing to save money on the roads and in the lots.

You can also go out later on Black Friday afternoon. I got dragged out once about 10-12 years ago and it wasn’t as bad as I expected. Clerks look like they’re war-zone evacuees, it’s badly picked over, but the stupidity has largely died down to average weekend if not even weekday afternoon activity levels. Anecdotal evidence suggests it’s still so. (It’s apparently also still a really bad time to go to the movies, though.)

For online shopping, start tracking the price of things you might be interested in, from that low-price air gun to the new computer or mattress. Don’t hesitate to ask here and on subject-matter forums what others have paid.

Especially if it’s going on credit or a budget is tight, what seems like a great sale might not be.

If we know it’s only a difference of X or has hit that level six times previously in the last eighteen months, we can better prioritize if it’s worth the interest or hit to savings, or if we’ll be better served waiting a bit. Autumn has too much to offer for free and discount to blow budgets or get deeper in debt unnecessarily.

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thefamilyineverknew · 6 years

Text

Turning 47: pt. IX

“Rocky Mountain Way”

21 May 2018

Monday morning at the Double Bar “L” farm and I am seeing my folks and aunt off. Before they go, my dad advises wisdom, should any meeting take place. “She probably has a lot more to risk than you, keep this in mind. Are you ready for this?”, he asks. I say that I am, and believe that I am.

One final farewell and my dad climbs into the minivan with my mom and aunt, and utters the phrase that has punctuated the beginning of all the road trips we had as a family, “We’re off like a herd of turtles!”, and they set off on their 12 hr journey back to their small town in Minnesota.

Traveling long distances by car is the way my family has always made their way to far-away destinations. The thought of flying to a place rarely, if ever, enters into the equation. Whether it is too extravagant, modern, or would relinquish the feeling of hands-on control, it is not something that they do. I have this same bug in my system. I love driving hours on end, marathon road trips, like the one I am on. Nature or nurture, I don’t know, but I love it. And for the month following my arrival back to Sweden, my dreams will consistently be of me in a car driving behind the wheel.

The drive ahead of me is not so long, 6-7 hrs, but promises to be dramatic, landscape-wise. But more on that later. For now, I say goodbye to my uncle John, thanking him for all the hospitality, food, and remembering to bring me a knife at meals (after living abroad, I am completely lost eating with solely a fork and fingers. Who knew?).

And I head out, off like a herd of turtles.

My plan is to be in Colorado until Sunday the 27th at the latest. That is the slimmest margin I can afford to return to Minnesota in time to catch my flight back to Göteborg on the 30th. This will give me a week to be in the vicinity should Arla be up to meet, a general sketch I describe to her via email. Whether or not she is game, I will be there. How could I not?

Man, is this part of the country, western Kansas, is beautiful to me. Flat forever on the horizon, semi-trucks barreling by, wide open skies, fields of grain extending as far as the eye can see; corn, wheat, soybeans, alfalfa, sunflowers, rows creating a visual rhythm as I zoom by, cruise control set to 75 mph. Having experienced it all from the backseat growing up makes being behind the wheel all the more enjoyable.

So what would it be like to meet my mother, my birth-mother? I have always pictured the emotion of it overwhelming me, with deep guttural yawps I had never heard before. Over the years here in Sweden, my mother-in-law (now ex-mother-in-law), Eva, has been bent on getting me on this television show, “Spårlöst” (means “without a trace”). The show’s premise is to follow and assist adoptees in Sweden search to find their families. Though I am touched that she would want this, I have absolutely no desire to make my meeting with these mysteries being unveiled a broadcast event. No way, no how. I can only imagine wailing uncontrollably like a buffoon on camera, and this is not how I wanted to be presented to the public. She would return to the idea again and again.

NOW, if a meeting were to happen, it would be in private and, hopefully, in the right conditions.

The only blood relatives I had ever met were my children, August and Esther. There are certain attributes and personality quirks, in both, that I can see come directly from me, (but then, from whom before? I wonder. How deep does this go?). August is lean and goofy, Esther is observant and hilarious. In fact, she is the most naturally funny person I’ve ever known. So quick witted. Years ago, shortly after their mother and I divorced, we were sitting at the dinner table, eating and talking, when August or I said something awkward that stopped the conversation. Esther looked up, as if toward a camera, and said, “We’ll be right back”, as if we were on air. She was 7. I must have laughed for 3 minutes straight. A real watershed moment. August and I share an interest in cars, though his far outpaces mine. We’ll be out and he’ll say, “Dad! Dad! Did you see that?” I’m like, “What?” “That! Over there! It’s a Mazda XBGDHTVFX-3! There are only TWO of those in Sweden! I can’t believe I’m seeing this!” I am excited for him to be starting auto mechanic school in the autumn. So, this is the extent to which I have been in touch with my bloodline, and whatever traits there might be in this shared DNA. What would await?

I cross the Kansas/Colorado state line. The landscape is exactly the same, flat, though a bit more arid and wild. I pull off to the first rest stop a couple miles in. It’s completely vacant; a perfect setting for a scene in a David Lynch production. I skype with Sara, my girlfriend back in Sweden, to just show her the area where I’m standing. Both the US and Colorado state flags are waving strong and proud in the gusting wind. It’s good to talk to her in this unassuming, nearly off-the-grid location. I am wishing she could be with me on this road trip. Skyping is the next best option. Thank you, internet.

I get back on the road, and will stay on this path for the next few hundred miles.

Musically, I alternate between my CD collection (thankfully brought a sleeve from home and purchased dozens at Goodwill back in Chicagoland), and the radio. Now, when you’re on the road, away from your local pre-set channels, you are at the mercy of the strength of the radio signal. You might find a station playing the perfect music or news, only to have it start to crack and fizzle as it loses it’s reach. Then you have to scan for another. I do like it, though, getting to know the culture of a given area via the radio options. During these stretches, one can reliably count on three radio flavors; Country, Christian, and Classic Rock. And you can find multiple versions of only these three, all within the same market. It started me sketching out a song in my head about this.

The miles wear on, the music plays at volume, and I’m singing along heading into the unknown. Then I see them; the Rocky Mountain range peeking up at the horizon. Faintly visible, just a touch of ultra-marine blue, added to copious amounts of white is how I would mix the paint. The feeling of seeing this has never changed since I was a kid, a feeling of power, possibility, adventure, and wonder. I have never gotten over it, and am exhilarated to know this, just this sight, still sends me. Every time I have been to Colorado, I am aware that this is where I came from (because that’s what the birth certificate says). And every time I think, I MUST have family here. This time I know for sure.

I stop to grab a bite to eat and check my messages and social. Arla has replied. She says that circumstances are such that we would not be able to meet this time, but that we most certainly will at some point in the future. Unfazed, I write back to say that there is no pressure, since the revelation of existence has already jumped us from 0-100, but that I will still be staying in Colorado this week if circumstances happen to change. I also emphasize that my being in the states is actually a rare event and that sometimes there is never a best time for things. Sent.

Sandwich and email finished, I celebrate with a strawberry shake and an extra shot of insulin.

See the transitions in landscape here>>>> https://youtu.be/q-eIu1qM2SE

You will pass the farm, Double Bar “L”, at 01:35. (Double Bar “L” is the family branding sign, used to brand livestock. It’s a capital L with two bars underneath. )

Below, you can see the Rockies come no into view.

#colorado #rocky mountains #journey #mountains

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furilia · 6 years

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How to Move like a Pro: Moving Tips and Checklist

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How to Move like a Pro: Moving Tips and Checklist

In the past 5 years, we’ve moved to 5 different cities and learned a few things about the art, or shall we say, pains of moving. We’ve lightened our load as we moved into smaller and smaller spaces and made some pretty stupid mistakes along the way too. Hopefully, these tips will teach you how to move like a pro and help your move go smoothly.

HOW TO MOVE LIKE A PRO

WHAT WE COVER [ CLICK LINKS TO SKIP AHEAD ]

Questions to Ask Yourself

Movers – Pros and Cons

Moving Pod – Pros and Cons

DIY – Pros and Cons

Best Ways to Purge

Tips for Packing

More Tips for the Week and Day Of

Moving Checklist Timeline

BEFORE YOU MOVE

Before starting anything, figure out your moving strategy. Here are some questions to ask yourself:

What’s your budget? Is a company paying for it or is it out of pocket?

Do you have the time and energy to do everything yourself or should you get movers?

What kind of vehicle are you taking? How are you transporting your cars (driving, towing, shipping)?

What’s your timeframe?

Are there any other considerations like kids or pets?

Whether you’re trying to do everything on your own or hiring someone to do it all for you, there are pros and cons to each. Generally, movers cost more than pods, pods cost more than renting a truck, and trucks cost more than driving your own car. But unless you are hiring a company to do it all for you, you’ll probably be looking at doing a hybrid of DIY and renting.

MOVERS

Movers are the best option if you are limited on time but not constrained by a budget. This is going to be the most expensive option and will also come with a whole set of choices to make. You can hire a moving company that does everything for you, including packing up and unpacking your stuff or just hire them to move everything from point A to point B.

PROS

Less stressful and time-consuming for you.

Most companies come with insurance in case anything gets damaged (although you should read the fine print carefully).

They typically know how to best pack your items into a truck.

They might provide you with packing materials and supplies.

They can typically store your items if there is a lag time between move out and move in date.

You don’t need to ask people for favors.

CONS

No one else cares about your stuff more than you do.

You won’t always know where all your stuff will be when you arrive. Even if it’s well marked, they may leave it in a different room.

Although they have a delivery date, things are out of your control, and the delivery may be delayed.

If you don’t have much, your belongings may be moved along with other people’s stuff.

Moving Scams

There are moving scams out there and you’ll have to do the research the be sure you find a reputable company. Here are some red flags: They refuse to visit your home to give a quick estimate, they don’t have a website or local address, they demand cash or a large deposit, and/or their vehicles are unmarked.

Don’t forget to photograph the condition of your belongings before the move in case there are any disputes. Communicate with your movers as often and thorough as possible so that there are no surprises. Read through your contract carefully so you know what is included and what they cover. These companies exist to help you move but also to be profitable, so they will ultimately be looking out for themselves. Not necessary, but it’s good to treat your movers well, keep them hydrated, and perhaps provide food and snacks.

MOVING POD

This is a relatively newer way to move and there are multiple companies doing this now, but it’s basically when they drop a container off at your property, you pack it up, then they ship it to your new location. Once it’s there, you are responsible for unpacking it. Typically this will be cheaper than full-service movers, but will probably cost more than doing it on your own.

PROS

You can take your time loading and unloading the pod.

You don’t have to be home to accept the delivery (assuming you’re allowed to leave a container lying around).

There are different sizes depending on your needs.

Your pod can be stored if there is a time gap between move out and move in.

CONS

Not all locations will allow a container to sit on their property.

You may still need help to load and unload your larger items.

Shipments can be delayed, which is out of your control.

You have to guess how much space you’ll need and may not know the optimal way to pack everything in.

DIY: MOVING TRUCK, YOUR OWN CAR, OR RENTING A MINIVAN?

This is what we have the most experience in. We’ve moved in a big truck, in just our sedan, and we’ve rented a van for our most recent move to NYC. This will typically be the cheapest option of the three but also the most labor intensive.

Depending on how much you have, look into regular rental cars as well (like minivans). They may be cheaper and more gas efficient than moving trucks, and also much more comfortable. Those seats in moving trucks are not comfortable especially for longer distances.

PROS

Move on your own timeline.

You can make a trip out of it. It’s easiest if you have a moving truck towing a car where you can leave it in a safe parking lot and unhitch your car to get around. Though, from our experience, it’s not easy as easy as you would think. You have to worry about all your valuables, and you have to consider things like makeup melting in hot weather. We’ve driven 36 hours straight so that we don’t have to worry about this.

Be in control of your stuff and know where everything is when you pack and unpack.

Typically the lowest cost option, but remember there may be hidden fees like labor, gas, hotels along the way etc.

CONS

It can be intimidating driving a big moving truck if you’ve never done it before. You also have to drive incredibly slow, so I hope you like driving!

Depending on what time of year, you may run into inclement weather.

You will need help loading and unloading.

You have to guess how much space you will need for the rental.

If you are moving over multiple days, you have to think about where to park the truck.

You have to deal with finding space to park your truck at your destination.

If something goes wrong, you can’t blame anyone but yourself.

To Bring Your Mattress or Not To Bring Your Mattress

Disclosure: Leesa provided us with a mattress to be included in this post. All opinions are our own. Thank you for supporting the brands that make Local Adventurer possible.

On our first 3 moves, we rented a big moving truck, primarily because we wanted to bring our king-sized mattress with us that we got as our wedding gift. Everything else we probably could have fit into something much smaller. It was the single most difficult item to move, and on our third year, we were finally able to let go.

Now, each time we move, we get one shipped to our new home. There are a few options, but we have a Leesa® mattress, which comes compressed in a box directly to your door, and it’s easy to move it to your bedroom before you let it expand. It doesn’t get easier than that. No need to figure out how to get it up the stairs and squeeze it through tight spaces anymore.

Most importantly, the 10″ hybrid foam mattress is super comfy! I know that everyone has their own preferences, so if you’re skeptical, they even have a 100-night sleep trial so you can give it a go at no risk to you.

How to Move with Your Pets and Kids

We have two cats, and because we’ve never flown with them before, we typically like to drive whenever possible (P.S. here are some tips for traveling with cats and traveling with dogs). Some of our friends with both kids and pets told us when they move cross country, it’s easier to hire movers and drive with the family since they need to take their cars anyways. Just make sure you have enough entertainment for the kids the whole way.

If you’ve moved with your kids and/or pets, leave us a comment below. We’d love to hear more tips from you!

PURGE & PACK

Each year we moved, we learned to make our load a little lighter.

BEST WAY TO PURGE

Make Four Piles: 1. Keep 2. Donate 3. Trash 4. Maybe. You can do a quick pass and then be more critical in subsequent rounds.

What to do with your donate pile: you can sell it online, do a garage sale, donate to Goodwill or a local organization that actually cares about their employees, give freebies for friends who help you move, list them on craigslist or freecycle, or get a junk service to pick it up (P.S. broken electronics can still sell for a decent amount on eBay – just be sure to disclose that it’s just for parts).

Box away what’s remaining in your maybe pile, and mark a date on it to open in 3 months or one year. Chances are you probably won’t use them again. When you see that you haven’t used those items, it will make purging through that pile on the next round easier.

Sleep on it and see if you have a change of heart.

Keep purging as you go. Unlike, Marie Kondo in the Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, I like to purge in phases and do different challenges throughout the year to keep things interesting too. Here are a couple projects we’ve done in the past: 100 Days of Less (Spending, Your Rules), and Project 333 (3 months with 33 pieces in your wardrobe). We also like to use the rule of when you buy one thing, get rid of one thing. One day, we’ll work towards the 100 Things Challenge.

7 THINGS YOU CAN DONATE OR TOSS

Something you can’t remember the last time you’ve used.

Multiples. Only keep the best one.

Things you’re keeping ‘just in case’ (like that partially used roll of ribbon you plan on wrapping someone’s future gift in). You can always buy it again if you actually need it.

Things that are broken. Those items you keep around because you plan on fixing them probably won’t get fixed if they haven’t gotten to it already.

Gifts you’re keeping out of guilt.

Collections. Consider digitizing nostalgic things like photos, cards, books, CDs, DVDs, and VHS. Hold onto a few that are near and dear, but you can get digital copies of most of them.

Specialized items or equipment that you use only once a year. Find things that are multipurpose you can use more often or you can rent equipment as you need them. This was our hardest struggle because we have a lot of random hobbies.

TIPS FOR PACKING

Packing and unpacking can be daunting and it’s easy to procrastinate.

Start with the easiest room, then the next easiest, then the next. If a room feels too big, start with a drawer. When you can start checking rooms off your list, it will motivate you to keep going.

Where to Get Boxes: Ask stores at the end of the day (good options are liquor stores, bookstores, and grocery stores), friends who recently moved or who get a lot of packages, schools, your workplace, craigslist, freecycle, or lastly, you can buy them at shipping or office supply stores.

Plastic bins are a great alternative (we use 50-80 Qts) plus they can be used as storage or stacked (if you have all the same kind). Since we move so often, we actually prefer these over boxes. Plus, they have handles that make them easier to move.

Use your backpacks and suitcases to pack. They are made to carry stuff and you can easily move a bunch of them at once.

Don’t pack huge boxes in hopes to consolidate. On our first move from Atlanta to Los Angeles, we used some MASSIVE boxes thinking it would be easier since it took fewer trips to unload. Unfortunately, it made these boxes hard to move and daunting to unpack. Use small boxes for heavy items.

Mark your boxes on all sides. Include both the room they belong to and what is in them to make it easier to find things.

Keep some clothes out for fragile items. This will save you from buying bubble wrap and reduce waste. We usually set aside some blankets too.

Keep your valuables in one place and easy to access. For us, that’s computers, hard drives, and camera gear. We try to keep it all together so that on the road we can bring those boxes into the hotel.

When you’re done with your boxes, don’t just toss them. See if someone else needs them too.

MORE TIPS FOR THE WEEK OF AND DAY OF

Pack a separate overnight bag of things you’ll need: change of clothes, toiletries, meds, etc. Refill your medication.

Don’t Forget to Hook Up Essentials: Know what utilities need to be transferred so that when you arrive, your new home is ready for you. That’s also true with cable. Cable companies usually need time to set up the internet, so be sure to take this into considerations.

Forward Your Mail: Don’t forget to the change your address for important bills, credit cards, and info. Also, don’t forget to forward your mail.

Take Photos Before and After Your Move: If you’re in an apartment, take photos before and after you move your stuff. It’s good to have the documentation in case there are any disputes with the landlord.

Set aside the things you want ready in your own home when you arrive. The last thing we want to do when we arrive at our new place is run to the store for supplies, so we bring a few things with us: cleaning solution, trash bag, toilet paper, paper towels. I want to make sure the place is clean before I start unpacking. We also like bringing a shower curtain. The last thing you want to worry about after a long day of moving is figuring out how to have a nice hot shower with no curtain.

Be a Good Host: Whether you have friends helping you move or you’re hiring movers, it’s good to have drinks and snacks for them provide them with plenty of fluids and nourishment. And don’t cheap out on them. It’s a big favor to ask people to move and you want to treat them right. It’s not a necessity, but it’s definitely nice. We’ve come across a few situations where we assumed that the company who hired the movers would provide simple things like water for a hot day, but some don’t.

Create a Packing Playlist: I know this sounds ridiculous but having some good jams really helps the time pass as you get things done. Music is a powerful motivator sometimes. If you’re driving to your new home, make a road trip playlist too!

MOVING CHECKLIST AND TIMELINE

Click image for full PDF

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Have you moved before? What are some things that helped with your move?

ESTHER + JACOB

Esther and Jacob are the founders of Local Adventurer, which is one of the top 50 travel blogs in the world. They believe that adventure can be found both near and far and hope to inspire others to explore locally. They explore a new city every year and are currently in NYC..