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#I have been writing fic since before most of you were born jfc
pepperf · 1 year
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@mylittleredgirl I finally had a chance to go digging in my dad’s attic for my vintage fic file. I couldn’t find the REALLY old one (grey folder with a rainbow square on the front), but I did find my slightly-more-recent one, mostly from secondary school. Only a couple of pieces had dates, the earliest was a Blake’s 7 fic from March 1992.
Also inside were fics for: Sapphire and Steel, the Man from U.N.C.L.E. (the original 60s one), several attempts to write a Georgette Heyer novel, a surprising amount of Three Musketeers fic, Labyrinth fic, my Bryan Adams self-insert fics, my obvious crushes on Lou Diamond Philips and Roger Taylor, my GCSE results, a bunch of X-Files fic (including printouts of other people’s fic - once I discovered that other people wrote fic too, my productivity took a steep dive!), and this gem of a list of potential character names for my DragonLance Mary Sue fic:
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Shoutout to teenage!me, who once seriously considered naming a character “Amoeba”. 🤣🤣🤣😭
ETA: proof!
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skinsharpenedteeth · 3 years
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a03 tag game
I stole this from @catboyadamparrish bc I want some of y'all to play with me here!
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1. How many works do you have on ao3?
50! (holy shit, that's half of 100)
2. What’s your current AO3 wordcount?
549,342 words (jfc)
3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
On Ao3, just two. I started the fanfic life writing Hanson fanfic back before most of you were born. (*bones creak ominously*)
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
all of these are Teen Wolf fics, which makes sense since they've been on Ao3 for 5-6 years.
Can't Be Seen Alone (teen wolf fic)
Mating Moons (teen wolf fic)
Alpha and His Good Boy (Teen Wolf)
Oh, what a nice surprise! (Teen Wolf)
Sterek Song (Teen Wolf)
***Also going to post the top 5 kudos in the fandom i'm currently active in bc why the fuck not? If Vlamis has taught me nothing, it's be shameless in your self-promotion. LOL***
Can I Stay? (RNM fic)
Like A Hearse You'd Die To Get In Again (RNM fic)
A Working Title (RNM fic)
Michael Guerin is a Grower (RNM fic)
Kinktober 3 (RNM fic)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not.
Yes and no. I respond if I think I have something to say? Or if my brain is letting me. I want to be the person that responds to all comments and responds to all fics I read, but (esp with responses) I tend to drop the ball a lot. I just feel like sometimes I sound disingenuous saying the same "thanks for reading and commenting!" over and over and over in my comments section? like it's an auto-response and someone else looking at that might be like "oh, well they never really comment back, they just like thank you and go" and i don't want anyone to feel like that? Like, better to just stay silent? Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it's my anxiety and depression talking. LOL. If I haven't responded to you, it's not because I don't appreciate your comment, it's because I don't know what to say besides Thank You. But Thank You. Seriously. Keep responding to fics. It sometimes is the only thing that can keep my fingers moving over the keys.
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
Oh uhm... probably either Wash the Guilt and Longing from His Limbs or you are the reoccuring kind. (damnit, now I'm singing that stupid Bright Eyes song again. Hello angst my old friend)
7. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve ever written?
I don't! And I don't usually read them either? I think people who do write them are amazing, but I like my peas and carrots not to touch? I dunno. They've just never appealed to me. (That being said, I like AU's based on movies/books, but I just don't want Elizabeth Darcy and Elizabeth Ortecho to hang out and be friends?)
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
I haven't! (Thank God) I see other people who do and I'm always flabbergasted why anyone would take the time to read something in its entirety just to yell that they didn't like it? There's a back button, my dude. There is an exit button. There is free will and all that. Curate your own fandom experience. If you don't wanna see things that upset you, then quit reading and find something you do wanna see?
9. Do you write smut?
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Yes.
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
No! Or at least if I have, I'm not aware of it.
11. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
No I haven't! I don't even know how that works, tbh. Like, part of me would like to try and part of me is like.... scared of being the Bossy One in a group project.
12. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Malex. Followed by pynch and then sterek. TW became such a shit show by the end it kind of tainted my love for them.
13. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
Hanson!
14. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Next question... Oh wait, we're finished!
I'd like to tag @pastelwitchling, @pippsmcgee, @thep0rnfairy, @im-the-punk-who, @lambourngb, @jocarthage, @flightspathfic, @malzysaur, @stayextrafrosty
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spockandawe · 3 years
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BingYuan~
Ooh, interesting! I’m guessing this is distinct from bingqiu, since I already tackled that one. I assume it uses non-transmigration shen yuan? So I can tell you that the biggest downside is that I’ve put very minimal thought into this ship before now, but let’s see what we get!
Downsides: 
My lack of interest in this ship is... a lot drive by the fact that I’m rarely looking for an opportunity to have less fantasy in my stories, and most bingyuan I’ve seen takes place in a modern setting :X 
It’s not a dealbreaker, and like, for example Iove the yi city coffee shop au, but fantasy-story-with-less-fantasy is almost never something I will seek out, it’s something I have to be persuaded into trying. I do love the silly, questionably-constructed universe of PIDW, especially with the conceit that it was constructed by Shang Qinghua, which I can identify with as an author who is sometimes forced into worldbuilding. The modern world? I live there, I don’t dislike it, but it’s a very familiar environment, while ancient fantasy china is very novel to me.
And honestly, I get much less invested in binghe and shen qingqiu/shen yuan without that ‘oh boy, my teacher who i want to please more than anything stopped hating me and started loving me instead.’ Binghe’s damage and the way that his damage affects the way he interacts with the people in my life is one of my favorite, FAVORITE parts of svsss, and dropping a shen yuan into his life after those formative childhood years... it’s just not going to have the same OOMPH as the canon body stealing situation.
Upsides: 
Now, you can get some really fascinating aus working with this situation, ones that had plain never occurred to me until someone presented it as a bingyuan scenario. Portal fantasies for binghe to show up in the modern world are fine, but don’t grip me as much of some of the more inventive ones. Two specific fics that pop out off the top of my head are feynite’s homemaker au one-shot (binghe exists in the modern world.... as well as his extended demon family, which interferes with his desire to be a nice quiet house husband), and pandaflower’s great and terrible oz series (binghe has been ruling the world for a very time, and is not terribly.... balanced, then shen yuan is born into the world, and binghe thinks he recognizes his old shizun reincarnated)
Those are both wild! I never would have thought of them myself, because honestly, aus are not typically my forte, but they are delicious. WIth the feynite one-shot, you get a bingyuan dynamic with a very bingmei flavor to it, and in the pandaflower series, binghe is very bingge, and it’s delicious and tense. Not having shen yuan as a fish out of water trying to integrate himself into a new place does take away some things that I like a lot about the original canon, but it introduces some really lovely new character dynamics to play with, and gives you a lot of room to explore.
And... oh........
Anon, I may have accidentally lied to you.
‘I’ve put very minimal thought into this ship’, I type, as I alt+tab over to my writing window, where I returned to working on (one of) my bingyuan wip(s) this morning.
Okay, yeah, I’ve got... 3.5 bingyuan aus (in one of them it’s not a good situation, but his original marriage was with a bingge, which went..... badly). Now, most of these are aus-of-aus situations, and explaining them is probably more words than I want to put into this ask meme, but like..... ‘I’ve put very minimal thought into this ship’ jfc
My main priority in these is that I love shen jiu, deeply, despite his many, many flaws, and his death breaks my heart. First au! Qijiu is a thing, Shen Yuan shows up mysteriously, lost and sick, dressed in modern clothing, and looking very much like Xiao Jiu as a child. He’s adopted into their family despite Strong protests from Shen Jiu, and then Shen Jiu gets attached. Second au! Binghe (bingge lite) is working on building his harem, and one of his new husbands is a certain Sha Yuan, who transmigrated into Sha Hualing’s younger brother at a very young age and basically (re)grew up in the PIDW world. 2.5th au! Binghe (true bingge) married Sha Yuan, things were.... Not Good, and anyways, Bingge died(?), the harem fell apart, and now Sha Yuan is kind of on the run with Mobei-jun and..... Xue Yang. I swear it makes sense, but what if i... don’t explain.
And, final au, what if Liu Mingyan and Liu Qingge were swapped, and she grows up to be the Bai Zhan Peak Lord and Shen Jiu copes less badly with her than her brother because [men] are a lowkey trigger for him, doesn’t spitefully recruit Luo Binghe to Qing Jing Peak, and little Liu Qingge drags Luo Binghe off to go train with his sister. Then........ also Shen Yuan as Shen Qingqiu’s little mini-me protege. All of these are technically bingliuyuan aus (except the 2.5th one) because I love Liu Qingge and can’t stand to see him sad or heartbroken, but yes, apparently I have spent a lot of time thinking about bingyuan and love it very much :V
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raymondshields · 4 years
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19 through 25? :0
19. Is there something you always find yourself repeating in your writing? (favourite verb, something you describe ‘too often’, trope you can’t get enough of?)
Hmmmm.... Honestly, not that I can think of? I mean characters in my head sometimes walk up and inform me they’ve committed incest again, but that doesn’t usually make it to AO3. (Shoutout to Rhada for informing me of a whole lot of shit he did with Sisyphus, who is related to him in Mirrorverse on a fucking technicality, jfc. But also Rhada’s been committing incest by way of sleeping with Gordon, aka Minos’ son, since the bronze age so.) 
I mean, I probably overuse Toby quotes, but tbh I actually can’t think of something I overuse too much. Huh.
20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)
I’ve already done this a lot (I’m actually answering this last because I’m trying to think of my favourite here), and. Hmmm. Honestly, I’m gonna go with IKM Minos, because while I have rambled about him before, only in DMs, and I haven’t talked about IKM much yet.
The thing is, I know as much about him as y’all who follow the series do. He’s very quiet in my headspace, and only ever comes out when I sit down and write him. But he’s four things. Four things, completely at odds with each other, and yet completely in harmony. He’s a griffon, he’s a Spectre, he’s noble, he’s feral. And everything he is can be summed up in those four traits.
He’s a griffon, to start. Half cat, half bird. All the casual arrogance of cats, all the flock behaviour of a bird, all the loyalty, all the insistence to guard. That’s what griffons do. They guard. And that’s his fundamental beginning: he’s a griffon, once you strip everything else away from him.
On top of that, he’s a Spectre. He’s casually cruel and vicious, very traumatized (how, I don’t know, he won’t tell me), he’s a strategist, he prioritizes his own survival but looks out for the others in his division, and he’s very very choosy about who he trusts to not hurt him, who he trusts he won’t hurt on purpose.
Then, his demon star, Nobility. This comes from the Age of Myth. He’s at ease with humans, can interact well with them, can slip around their social etiquette with grace, despite being nothing like them. He’s a little bit chivalrous, has honour enough, tries not to get too messy, actually does have a moral compass of sorts.
Lastly, he’s feral. Wild. Untethered and unforgiving and free. This is the opposite of his demon star, yes. But it is what he is, and he has no issues stripping free of his fancy clothes and running naked through the mud with nothing but fur to cover him and howling at the moon as he rips through prey with his teeth. 
Seems contrary, and indeed, he’s a very contrary person. The real joy in how those go together.
A griffon Spectre means he’ll guard his division. He doesn’t need to love them to have no option but to guard and protect them. He’s the leader of the flock, and he’ll do what needs doing. He’s cruel, he’s responsible, and he does what he needs to. This ties in well with Nobility, his star, because he has enough of a moral compass to know when he has to sacrifice someone, and how to feel bad about it, while his Spectreness allows him to not feel as bad about it as he could.
Naturally, most of the time, he’s noble, a bit fussy and imperious, likes his poetry as a way of speaking. But the more he’s hurt, the angrier he is, the more upset he is, that stripes away into his feral nature. His nobility is a mask and a shield for his true nature: simply a wild griffon, untethered by any rules and unforgiving to any that meet him. I’ll explore this part a bit further later on as this is the part of him that Alba really falls in love with, but this is where his personality begins to really shine. That duality between his noble, imperious nature and his honest, wild self.
He’s a hard as fuck character to write. But oh, I love the results. 
21. What other medium do you think your story would work well as? (film, webcomic, animated series?)
As answered previously, I Have No Fucking Idea But Probably Anime.
22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them?
As also answered previously, yes, because I have no other choice if I want to see my damn rarepairs most of the time, and I enjoy doing so because I like most of my fics. 
23. What’s the story idea you’ve had in your head for the longest?
I answered last time as Rose’s story, but I checked my spreadsheet for what I’d forgotten and gold star me, I forgot about one I really do want to talk about: the TLC version of Seanan McGuire’s Every Heart a Doorway as a long fic! Harry Potter AUs are out. Wayward Children AUs are in as fuck.
What I know is that Aiolos and Aiolia run a school like Eleanor does. It may be located not far from Sagiverse’s Saint Shion’s University, probably Academia Terrestria. Most of the cast is TLC, Golds and Spectres mostly. It follows the adventures of one young Sasha, kicked out of her world by Hades himself after going mostly all the way through the plot of TLC itself, as she deals with coming back without her brother - a possibility she’d already made peace with - but with him still in Sanctum Greece, out and committing mass murder - the part she isn’t cool with.
She walks in during the first few chapters to meet Aiolia just as Minos - from a high Nonsense, high Wicked world where everything is the theatre and the rules make you think it’s Logic and it’s not - bolts across the room, swings a grappling hook around the chandelier, and scales the wall in the nick of time before Pandora throws her trident at him. They’re roommates. Pandora’s from Prism, Kade’s world, as the Goblin Princess so she is understandably wanting Minos dead here.
Sasha blinks, immediately goes on the defensive because hello, two Spectres, but neither know who the hell she is. Lia takes her with him as he negotiates getting Minos into the tower room with Albafica, from the Moors where he and his dad fend off vampires with a strain of woody rose poison they put into their blood, and then puts Sasha in with Pandora, who helps her figure out that just because she knows all of these faces and names doesn’t make them the same people. (This is after watching her freak out over Minos and Alba sharing a room, because she watched them kill each other.)
And then like two weeks later Alone shows up, immediately throws himself at the Dragon Prince Rhadamanthys, who is sixteen and doesn’t know how to handle a small child without a tail and shares the attic with Aiacos, who lived in a world of fire and brimstone and light and wind, moderate Virtue, moderate Logic. Sasha freaks out, Pandora sits on her, and it is discovered not that long later that Alone brought Hades with him.
I have no idea what the plot is past that point. I figure I’ll be asking Zander or another system how I should best write Alone and Hades, which is a standard possession that I want to be thinly-veiled multiplicity, because really those two things are the damn same from where I’m standing and that would be cool.
I’ll write it when I’ve got a plot. Gah.
24. Would you say your writing has changed over time?
Oh abso-goddamn-lutely. I finally figured out how to show and not tell so much, and how to vaguely fix my biggest problem that I had forever: expanding individual threads so I didn’t rush everything. Now that I’ve figured out how to do that, I’m pretty sure I could redline for another writer struggling with the same thing. One of the bits of advice someone said that really fixed my writing was the idea of one, ‘always name at least two sensory details in every paragraph’, and two, ‘for the next six months never write ‘they saw that’ ‘they felt like’ ‘they wanted to’ etc etc, and find a way to say that without saying that, take no shortcuts and never say it outright’. Once you understand why they’re telling you to do that, you can go do it again and avoid the purple prose, but it teaches you how to expand things.
Instead of just going ‘he was sad’, if you can’t say that, then what ends up happening is that you quietly restate he was sad by referencing it in his every action. Body language. Tone of voice. Show don’t tell is advice that works great with examples. Take out every ‘they were’ ‘they saw’ ‘they felt’ and you have no choice but to show it without telling it. And it makes your writing so much stronger.
Another thing I learned was that a Mary Sue isn’t a level one character, they’re a level twenty in a level-three-recommended story. Their backstory is their plotline. This one I learned from Betsy Lee, with No Evil versus Brother Swan- specifically, Ozma Angeline. Look at her child form. Now look at her adult. Her adult is the perfect idea of an edgy Mary Sue. But it’s clear the moment you see her child form, that her every adornment was gained after she first appeared. She wasn’t born that way. Every mark she has is a part of her story. I first met Angel in NE, and I got to know her. Then I saw her in BS and I was like “is that fucking Angel???” and suddenly everything made sense. That’s a well-written character. Sure, we see fuckall of her arc, but that’s when I finally understood how to write a powerful character without making them a Mary Sue. Because nothing stands in the way of a Mary Sue, they never struggle. You set the Mary Sue as their endgame, twenty years after the series ends, and you’re golden.
The last thing I really learned that helped me so much owes itself to Seanan McGuire, of course the Toby books. Specifically: Luna Torquill. This is where I learned that allies become enemies offscreen if they want to, and how to give your side characters a true arc without ever giving them the spotlight. Toby characters don’t feel like they’re just waiting for Toby herself to check in with them. They go do their own stuff when she’s not there, and actively get more development offscreen without ever feeling out of character. Luna is the most obvious example, but Sylvester, Antigone, Tybalt, and Cass all do it too. Actually, the only one who didn’t was Connor and he died and I didn’t like him anyway. Luna really showed me how to bring my side characters to life, and in that understanding helped me really get how to write a character arc.
25. What part of writing is the most fun?
Sneaking in metaphors and foreshadowing and recurring motifs and parallels, and doing so accidentally because I’m just that good. /lh No really, I love having parallels and shit in my writing that make me look smarter than I am, because most all of them are accidental and I only notice after someone points it out. I look like a genius. I’m bullshitting it the entire way. But when I do actively do it, and it works out, I like it even more. I love hiding little things that reinforce the storyline and atmosphere and add a deeper meaning to my work.
Like, for example. In Aeternum, specifically As We Watch The Hourglass, Tsuko pointed out that the state of the boiler room perfectly represents Minos’ mental state. She’s fine, she’s fixing things, and then outside circumstances causes her to fall apart and Alba just attempts to patch it up enough that it’s vaguely safe enough to work with, but still very very fragile and prone to collapsing at any second. Add in that she’s an engineer and this is her specialty and biggest talent, and it seems like a super cool parallel to do, especially since I really like reflecting my characters in the world around them.
It was completely accidental. I wanted to show that her sadism that canon Minos has is in there, that she isn’t totally OOC and just hasn’t yet become more like her canon form (he’s more traumatized and has gone down a path she’s only inching onto at the moment), but I also wanted them to get a damn bath so Alba could bitch about his hair, while showing that Minos is actually surprisingly useful. In order to do that, I needed the boiler room, I needed to show her fragility, and then I needed to show what was underneath that. And then I needed the threat gone so they could do other shit. In order to make that realistic, I forced her to not panic about it even though she really wanted to, and Alba did a shoddy job because we gave him like an hour and he’s running on little food and less sleep. That was it, that was my entire thought process. And on the page, there’s symbolism that makes me look smart.
When I go to rewrite Aeternum, I’ll be showing more of their early relationship, so she actually is useless onscreen for a bit, so the scene has more oomph when surprise, she has talents after all. (Later those talents will prove very important, but I haven’t written that part yet and won’t for a while.)
So yeah. Accidental symbolism. I love doing that shit. 
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kae-karo · 5 years
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things i’m grateful for
okay preface: i hate the reason thanksgiving was invented ofc but i do love the concept of taking a day to sit back and remind myself of the things in my life that i’m grateful for so here we go (and pls i encourage y’all to take some time and do the same) anyway feel free to read below the cut if y’all want way too much insight into my personal life lmao
my friends
without question, my experience both in the phandom and like in life in general has so massively improved thanks to these lovely people and i can’t say i’d be as happy a person as i am without them
of course my incredible gcs (jolly best friends and dickmates, “moderate sex references”, we have goldfish memories, katashen, and the gc that always changes names lmao) and the lovelies in them @thereisnobearonthisisland @philsroots @uselessphillie @daliensgrandads @severaltortillascollector @dnptrqsh @dip-and-pip-trash @transhowell @dreamdilddy @hey-itskxt @dreamdilddy @freckliephil @philsdrill @phloridas @lovestillaround @legdabs @amczingphil @phantasieslide @maanjha @manialester @sleeplessnightwithphan @phandumb @imnotinclinedtomaturity @auroraphilealis @ineverywordisay @glitterydanandphil @kerasines @workinprogress91 @merridewhoo @natigail @swissfuckingcheesegdi @phastelpink​ @stick-it-to-the-phan @phanarchy
my dearest friends irl with whom i never spend enough time and often bail on bc i’m tired of existing around people, but who never fail to be lovely and kind and wonderful friends anyway. i’ve known them for eight years now and i am so lucky to have found them and to still be friends with them
a very good friend of mine who taught me everything i know about customer service and just being a diligent person (she’s also literally the reason i link everything so uhh thank her lmao) who i consider my lesbian big sister and who i’ve been so so lucky to get to reconnect with and will get the opportunity to work with starting in december and who even remembered one of my fave bands like after literally two years when i only mentioned them one time i love her
my family
whomst thank fuck are not on this hellsite but i love them all dearly
my sister who’s like still figuring her life out and doing a way better job of deciding what she enjoys doing than i ever did and like she’s younger than me but it’s a constant lesson that hey look it’s good to be true to yourself and do what you want. and i’m so grateful that we don’t fight the way we used to, that we’re like partners in crime and that she actually likes spending time with me and thank god she’s not gonna see this bc she thinks i get too sappy sometimes but i gotta make up for hiding her glasses when we were younger and literally forgetting about them for two weeks okay <3
my parents who have always been steadfast supporters even when they don’t love my choices. without them, i wouldn’t be where i am today, i wouldn’t have the level of independence i do today, and honestly i wouldn’t have learned to find the strength to follow my own path. i also can���t thank them enough for supporting even when they don’t understand, like they literally do not understand dnp but my dad found out they were doing ii and asked if i would want tickets for christmas and my mom always asks about my writing
my grandma who, bless her soul, has been completely alone without my grandpa for two years now, after having been with him since she was sixteen, who reminded me (unintentionally) that people who are suffering from mental health issues (she’s had depression for years now) can so greatly benefit from having someone reach out. i’m grateful for our weekly calls where we just catch up, because sometimes i go for a year without seeing her in person (usually just for the holidays) and it’s good to know how things are going with her. i’m also eternally grateful to her for reminding me that people are just people. my parents often talk about her as if she’s some one-dimensional character who only has a handful of (negative) personality traits, and it’s nice to get to know her on my own
the rest of my extended family, who, although i’m not nearly as close to, are still always fun to see during the holidays, and i’m immensely grateful that i don’t have the kind of family that i dread seeing. there’s always entertainment, overflowing alcohol (not that i partake, but everyone else has a fuckin blast with it), and laughter and although i occasionally feel a bit outside the circle (lots of cousins getting married/in relationships/etc and uhhh can’t relate lmao) i never fail to look forward to seeing everyone
y’all
yeah ik it’s cheesy but i do really appreciate y’all so much? like. i just read this note i made to myself abt something unrelated a year ago but i’d offhand mentioned that i was so so thrilled to have almost a hundred people following me. like it just blew my mind that so many people were interested in what i had to say, in my writing at the time, etc. and now,,,,,i mean. jfc i can’t even begin to fathom what i must’ve done to deserve all of y’all, and to deserve you all being so kind. like since the minute i joined tumblr i saw/heard horror stories of mean anons, of people being rude for the sake of it, etc etc. and like. of the literal thousands of asks i’ve gotten, i can count on one hand the number of even vaguely unkind ones. it just makes me so immensely happy to know that such lovely, kind people want to participate in this blog. so please know that i appreciate the existence of every single one of you not just uwu bc u follow me and that’s what i’m supposed to say or w.e but bc you’re out here making a positive impact on the world and on me, and you’re the kind of lovely person that i’m so glad i have the pleasure of existing alongside
dnp
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ u knew it was coming, but honestly i am grateful to them as people
they set such fantastic examples for how to be good humans, constantly donating their time to good causes, reminding us to take care of ourselves, and doing their best to figure themselves out which yes is so incredibly important bc it’s this amazing example of how people aren’t any perfect shiny version of themselves, they’re real and raw and imperfect and that’s why we love them???? and by extension, that teaches us self love and love for others
that’s another thing i really didn’t realize at first - how much self-hatred i was harboring, how much internalized homophobia (toward myself! never others) and how much i just accepted about the world (heteronormativity, misogyny, the lack of diversity in media, the list goes on) and a lot of things said by both dnp and by the phandom have helped open my eyes to things like that. and dnp helped me realize that being ace isn’t a bad thing??? which was such a horrible thing i’d held onto for years and years
so i’m so grateful to dnp for existing, for being who they are and how they are and for encouraging the wonderful kindness and acceptance that they want to see in the world
my therapist
and to daniel and depression for convincing me to see one. i’ve let go of a lot of the baggage i was holding onto over the time i’ve been seeing my therapist and i’m grateful to her for, well, doing her job. and for doing it well, and for asking the questions that i didn’t think to ask, to get at things i didn’t think about before. and for reminding me (not directly, but by virtue of her existence) that honesty is one of the most important things to me
my job
or just generally the jobs i’ve had over the years that force me to interact with people, because it’s taught me that nobody’s ever angry or upset for no reason, and that people who are angry or upset and mean are not mean because they’re actually trying to be vicious but because they’re suffering in some way. so it’s a daily reminder to treat everyone with kindness and not take things personally, because ultimately most people are not intentionally vicious people. and i’m grateful to my job for reminding me how meaningful it is to me to help others
#privilegecheck
i think it’s important at this point that i stop and remind myself that i was born with a lot of privilege that makes my life immensely easy compared to others. i’m grateful for my upbringing and the ways that i’ve benefited from my privilege, but i need to acknowledge that i have benefited. not everyone is as lucky, and i need to be mindful of that in the things i do and say, and in the actions i choose to take, and - when i can - i should be using my privilege to help others
and finally, my greatest of thanks goes out to the fic writers, the gif makers, the edit makers, the phan artists, and all the other lovely people who make this community so wonderful
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maddieson-san · 6 years
Note
2, 7, 13, 15, 16, 17, 18, & 19. :D
JFC NIKKI. 
2. What’s next on your ‘to-read’ list? (Fan fiction or otherwise)
Sadly, fanfiction wise, I’m all caught up I think? (cough/wantmorekogkagfics/cough). Book wise? My god, I’ve been so crazy busy… I’m looking for recs!
7. What’s the last thing you read that made you cry?
Honestly, that’s not even fair. EVERYTHING makes me cry now, haha. Hm, let me see. It was probably when I read such a pretty girl. It is not the time for me to be reading stuff like that.
13. Exes or established relationship?
I think I’ve done more established relationships… and I’ve never done like exes. DONT GIVE ME PLOT BUNNIES WOMAN. GOD. No. NOPE. So you know what, I’ll just say established relationship. So I can ruin them.
15. Post the last line you wrote without context.
“Did you just try to use your birthday as an excuse to have sex?”
16. Describe your WIP that currently has the highest word count.
Woman, all of have are WIPs. Haha. Hm, let’s see. We’ll go with this one:
College girl moves next door to a hot cop. She literally cannot keep her hands off him. 
Is that good enough? Ahaha. YOU KNOW I SUCK AT THIS. 
17. Describe a fic that is still in the ‘ideas’ stage.
Ya see, this is a bad idea. Because you know I’m well known for just having a bunch of WIPs all over the freaking place. Ugh. Why do you do this to me?
OKAY, well I watched a movie and then I really wanted to do this BUT IT WILL NOT SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY.
Inuyasha is Kouga’s half brother. He’s younger than Kouga. Kagome is his best friend. They share the same birthday. They’ve known each other since they were born. He lost his mom, she lost her dad. They had inseparable. But they are just friends. They are each other’s most important person, and Inuyasha doesn’t have many friends because he’s Inuyasha and he doesn’t let others in easily. Kagome is more sociable. And hm, she has a hard core crush on Kouga. Whom Inuyasha hates. (Because older brother complex, plus he’s a full youkai). So he’s off-limit to Kagome. Which wouldn’t matter - if it weren’t for the fact that she accidentally kissed him during a house party and now she can’t get him out of her head. (He replaces the guy for 7 mins in heaven, and its dark she cant tell its him, shes never kissed anyone.) His relentlessly pursue ain’t helping either.
18. Do you have a fic reading/writing routine?
I wish I had a writing routine. Then maybe I would be more productive. But usually, I get most of my writing done if I can isolate myself, but some headphones and have a lot of room to mimic my character’s physical actions (grunting, etc.) Reading? I can read anywhere; upside down in a bus, under the desk at the office, ahaha. It doesn’t matter where I am, I get lost in my reading. 
19. What’s your favorite character headcanon?
Hm. I’m pretty sure it’s like, Kouga slowly taking over all the wolf packs (you know before youkais go extinct), and showing them a way of life where they don’t eat humans no more. So for the rest of life, Kagome is there, in the back of his head, always the reason why he changed his whole life and the life of all the wolf youkais. 
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end-o-the-line · 7 years
Text
A Captain America: the First Avenger Timeline for Fic Writers
(I’m so sorry I erased the original post I’M SO SORRY! You can read this without the visual aids on AO3.)
March 10, 1917 - James Buchanan Barnes is born, and we were all officially fucked.
July 4, 1918 - Steven Grant Rogers is born, and somewhere in Brooklyn Bucky's mother wept . . .
June, 1924 - Steve's mother is bedridden from illness associated with Tuberculosis.
September, 1930 - 12-year old Steve and 13-year old Bucky meet for the first time in Hell's Kitchen, where Bucky scares off bullies trying to steal Steve's money. What were they doing in Hell's Kitchen? No one knows. Steve tells Bucky he's been living in the orphanage 'on 8th' since his mother's death. Which is odd since Bucky was apparently at her funeral when they're both legal adults in a flashback scene from the Winter Soldier. For the purpose of this timeline, info from the movies will take precedent over info from the various tie-ins. Meaning Sarah Rogers is basically Schrödinger's Ma for the next 6 years.
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1936 - Shrodinger's Ma finally actually dies fo sho of Tuberculosis. Bucky breaks everyone and their mother's heart with his 'til the end of the line' line. (Also, per MCU canon, Bucky's 'folks' are still alive . . . and own a car.)
February ish, 1940 - Colonel Phillips first approaches Howard Stark, in Los Angeles, about working for the SSR. (Stark Industries was formed in 1939, and 'a year later' Howard is at a nightclub in West Hollywood called Ciro's, demonstrating the properties of Vibranium. Ciro's opened in January of 1940. So keeping in line with the MCU canon and with real world history, as you do, January 1940 is the absolute earliest that Howard could have been recruited.) They're pursued and Stark deploys rockets from the ass-end of his car to escape them because Howard Stark.
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Agent Margaret "Peggy" Carter, aka Agent 13 is already in deep cover working for Schmidt as a maid in his personal mansion.
November, 1940 - Peggy rescues Dr. Erskine from Schmidt's mansion two days after Johann Schmidt forces him to inject the experimental serum, proving that we all could have saved a lot of time if Peggy had done that three fucking days earlier, Jesus.
May 25, 1941 - Steve goes to the Dodgers-Phillies game at Ebbets Field. Was Bucky with him? We don't fucking know. It was a Sunday, so maybe. It’s not like Steve knew other people . . .
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December 7, 1941 - Steve and Bucky are in an art class - like . . . how can anyone write these two as dirt poor when they're fucking around on their Sundays at baseball games and art classes? By this point the economy was booming as the work force was being drafted left and right, these two would not have been in need of jobs. And two Irish-Catholics (honestly, Bucky is probably Scottish, lbr) skipping church? tsk tsk - when the class is informed by a runner that Pearl Harbor has been attacked.
Okay real talk here, for a second. The draft officially started in 1940, pulling men 21 years of age and older. In 1940, Bucky was 23. He was single, no kids. He absolutely could not have given conscientious objector status as a way to avoid it because if he had, when he was drafted later on he never would have seen combat. He should have been drafted in '40 or '41. The only reasons he wouldn't have been was if he was a student, or if both his parents and/or his siblings were considered his dependents. Since some sources say both Bucky and Steve were orphans, then it is entirely plausible that both Bucky's parents died close to the time Bucky turned 19 or 20, in which case he could have become the legal guardian of his younger siblings.
PS: Bucky is not an orphan in the MCU (nor is he poor in that suit, jfc):
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So either Bucky was working like a damn dog supporting his family, in which case the fuck are you doing in an art class, kiddo? Or he was actually a student at a college or university.
.....he could also have, during the years the US was gearing up in case they were forced into the conflict, held a job that was considered vital to the coming war effort. This sort of deferment was limited to jobs in war production, and jobs that involved national 'health, safety, or interest'. Literally the only job I can think of without actually like . . . researching it, that Bucky could have been in where he would have been skipped the first few times but taken in '42, is if he had been a police officer. That would fit very well with his ability with a gun, plus explain why he made sergeant so fucking fast, with prior training other inductees would not have had.
Considering what a golden child Bucky was in Brooklyn, all three of those scenarios would be a perfectly valid reason for Bucky to have avoided the first several waves of conscription. Just thought that was interesting.
Anyway! Steve wants to enlist right away, so Bucky (a three-time YMCA welterweight boxing champion, suck it) trains him for two whole weeks because Bucky is apparently of the opinion that Steve is an idiot who won't get in anyway so why fucking bother going hard.
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*at the time, under the regulations of the New York State Athletic Commission, welterweight was a weight class of 147 to >160 pounds. Meaning post-war Bucky gained about 40 pounds of pure muscle after getting the serum....dude.
December 24, 1941 - Bucky is right and Steve's first attempt to enlist fails so hard. Go to Midnight Mass, Steven.
March, 1942 - Red Skull fucks shit up in Tønsberg, Norway and finds the Tesseract.
September 21, 1942 - Bucky receives his draft card, and takes it to an intake facility and enlists in the US Army. The following dates are literally nowhere in canon, but I have research to back up what is essentially pure speculation on my part. His serial number is 32557038. There is a real world counterpart who actually had this particular serial number, and he was enlisted on this date. So, in order for Bucky to have gotten to the number before this guy, Bucky probably woke up early Monday morning to get shit done.
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Desperate Historian's Note: I always assumed that since he was a Sergeant when he first shipped out, Bucky had been in service for at least a year and a half, which is still pushing it within the constraints of the timeline. Most NCO's at the start of US involvement in the War, Corporals and Sergeants, already had years of Army service under their belts. But no. 9 months. So. Bucky basically kicked ass and took names to become a Sergeant in 9 months of non-combat training (which took place at Camp McCoy, Wisconsin btw). That, or every NCO in his regiment came down with a sudden case of the Deads and he got promoted.....Bucky would have needed a special recommendation from the company commander - TWICE in 9 months - to reach that rank. Jesus. It is canon fact that Bucky was indeed an absolutely phenomenal soldier (and leader) . . .
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He would have been sent to basic training and been gone for ten weeks, meaning it would have been over by the 1st of December, 1942, or thereabouts.
December 1, 1942 - Give or take a week or two, maybe, depending on how quickly he was whisked away after enlistment, Bucky would have been given a week's furlough after training at Camp McCoy ended.
December 8, 1942 - Since he is a designated marksman (not a sniper, the US Army didn't have those in WWII. A designated marksman was just a guy in a regiment who was an excellent shot and stuck with their regiment at all times and was used situationally, never went off alone to shoot people in the head and stuff), he absolutely would not have been sent to any sort of sniper training because, again, the US did not have those in WWII. He wouldn't have stayed in NYC, though.
He would have been on an Army base somewhere, with the occasional week-long furlough to return home. There were 114 mobilization camps by 1942, and only three of those in New York state; Madison Barracks, Camp Upton, and Pine Camp, with three more in New Jersey; Fort Dix, Fort Monmouth, and Camp Shanks. 17 were in California, 14 in Texas. Anyway. So, before Bucky leaves for war, he and Steve wouldn't have seen a whole lot of each other for the year before that, either.
June 7, 1943 - Bucky probably arrives in NYC on a final week's furlough before being sent to War. With the way Steve looks at him when he sees the uniform later on, and Bucky's cocky little head tilt, it's probably safe to say Bucky received his sergeant's chevrons not long before this furlough. (Honestly . . . I have never understood this part. Bucky damn well knew he was 107th from the moment he reported, and Steve should have as well. Also, ‘getting his orders’ had nothing to do with his uniform, soldiers were required to wear that shit everywhere they went. Unless Steve knew he’d gotten his orders simply because he was there and shouldn’t have been....whatever, movie exposition, blah blah)
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June 14, 1943 - Steve's fifth attempt to enlist fails spectacularly because he had to claim to be from New Jersey. He then goes to get the shit kicked out of him in an alley behind a movie theater, that's what you get for saying you're from Jersey, Steven. He and Bucky attend the Stark Expo that evening, where Steve ghosts like an asshole - even though for all he knows this is literally the last time he will ever see Bucky alive!! - and is chosen by Dr. Erskine as a candidate for Project: Rebirth.
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June 15, 1943 - Bucky and the 107th ship out for 'England'. Now, the troop transport Queen Mary left NYC on June 1, 1943, heading for Gourock, Scotland and carrying the 1077th Signal Company Service Group. It took 5 days; they arrived on June 6, 1943. On July 16, 1943, the Edmund B. Alexander carried 5,000 replacement troops to Liverpool, England. That journey took ten days; they made land on July 26, 1943. Maybe. The records are full of literal question marks, so I dunno. That's the closest thing I can find to Bucky's stated journey. Most of the troops leaving from NYC at this period were actually heading for Africa, landing in Casablanca, Morocco.
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I know Bucky says he's shipping out for England in the morning, but it makes so much more sense that the 107th would have been sent to Africa and then swept up into Italy in the next four months of fighting, where Steve finds them later. It would be easy to deal with this by either saying Bucky's an idiot, or (my recommendation) that Bucky knew exactly where he was heading and he just wasn't telling Steve that he was being sent into the heart of the brutal African and Italian campaigns rather than a nice balmy Liverpool in the summer. The journey from NYC to Casablanca, Morocco would have been anywhere from 11-15 days.
June 20-25, 1943 - Bucky would have hit Liverpool, England right around this time, if that's the way he was sent.
June 25-30, 1943 - Bucky would have docked in Casablanca, Morocco, if this is the way it went instead. So I guess you could safely say he made landfall in the European Theater on June 25, 1943? Haha right in time for Mussolini to get his ass arrested and the Italian Fascist government to fall.
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June 22, 1943 - Steve is injected with the super-soldier serum, right Steven? (Meaning he only had a week of basic training, at most, and everything else he knows about being a soldier he taught himself with all those books he brought to Camp Lehigh with him.)
September, 1943 - Ugh, okay, history nerds cover your ears, because there is just no way to make the real invasion of Italy match up with the MCU invasion of Italy. Unless the 107th just said fuck those guys and marched right into German territory past the . . . bombs and stuff. On September 9, there were Allied landings at Salerno and Taranto, Italy, and they didn’t enter Naples until October 1. I mean, is it really all that shocking that they got their asses kicked in Azzano? NO. But having a fucking USO show that deep into Italy means the MCU said fuck it, so you too can say fuck it when it comes to the real WW2 timeline in Italy, idfc. This is apparently what the MCU lines looked like at this point in time, and let me just tell you, see that bulge there, right under the Hydra flag? Those fuckers would have been surrounded and cut off so fast, so fast, just like in Bastogne. Assholes....anyway.
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October, 1943 - The Battle of Azzano results in Hydra declaring war on anything that moves, including Nazis, and takes prisoners from various different regiments that historically were either still in training or in the Pacific Theater at this point, but that's fine. Prisoners are taken over 120 km away to a Hydra weapons factory in Kreischberg, Austria, where their Hydra captors separate the men into cages according to their nationality and other factors. The purpose of this is for the bickering hodgepodge of Allied soldiers to keep each other busy with in-fighting so the Hydra guards can forget to train and get beat up by Captain America in a month or so.
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Dum Dum Dugan almost immediately makes a joke while Cage Team Howling Commando is introducing themselves, and a brawl breaks out. As you do.
In Bucky's cage are the following:
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Jacques "Frenchie" Dernier, French Resistance, born January 2, 1911 (32). The fuck was your French ass doing in northwestern Italy, son? To my knowledge the French Resistance kind of worked mainly . . . in France. The Italian Resistance was very active in this period, so they could have been collaborating, but that's not what the Resistance did, mostly. So the only logical conclusion we can come to with Frenchie is that he was captured somewhere in France by Hydra and transported to the factory as labor. He lived in Marseilles before the War, and likely would have stayed close to it.
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Major James Montgomery "Monty" Falsworth, born January 2, 1914 (29), of the British 3rd Independent Parachute Brigade, which historically first saw action in June of 1944, ha. Anyway, Monty was from Birmingham, England and was known in the comics as Union Jack, and the pin on his beret is a nod to that. Teeeechnically? Monty outranks Steve, but since they're not even part of the same Army, that's kind of a moot point. He winds up with the rank of Brigadier, which wtf, that means he outranked Colonel Phillips when the war ended . . . four for you, Monty.
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Private Gabe Jones, born August 14, 1918 (25), was 92nd Infantry Division, a segregated unit that historically first saw action in September of 1944, haha. Gabe was from Macon, Georgia and was fluent in French and German thanks to pre-war studies at Howard University. Just as proficient in hand-to-hand as the others, he was often part of the team’s frontal assaults, as well as handling the radios . . . and he boned Peggy Carter in the comics.
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Corporal Timothy 'Dum Dum' Dugan, born April 11, 1912 (31), was a member of the 69th Infantry Regiment, which is also known as the 165th or Fighting Irish, recruited solely from NYC, who were making landfall in the Pacific right about now. Frustrated historian's note: Had he been a real boy, Bucky Barnes would have been enlisted into the 69th Infantry as well, just like Dugan. Canon-wise it makes sense that Bucky and Dugan were from the same unit, even though canon thinks they weren't because canon made up the WWII-era 107th? Anyway, the fact that both Dugan and Bucky were in the same foxhole when the Hydra tank hits in the cut scene from First Avenger is all fucked up because you don't put your NCOs where they can be blown up together, okay. It's bad strategy. Add to that the fact that Dugan calls him Bucky like they've been buddies for a while, but the tie-in comic is still on 'Jimmy' and also states that Dugan and Barnes were in the same company after all, that cut scene is frustrating. Or I guess the comic is frustrating? Something's frustrating, anyway. I think the best way to deal with this is just to say that the 107th IS the Fighting Irish regiment because fuck it. Dugan will eventually take over leading the team when Steve goes splat, leading the Howling Commandos and being involved with SHIELD, and Nick Fury personally, well into the Cold War.
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Private Jim Morita, born October 20, 1919 (24) - also, Happy Birthday here's a Hydra weapon NOW ASSEMBLE IT - wasn't in the same cage as the others, but he served in the US Army's Nisei Squadron as a Ranger, aka the 442nd Regimental Combat Team. Their real fight in the European Theater began in June of 1944, so who the fuck knows how his ass wound up in Austria. And since the whole unit was made up of men of Japanese descent, it's safe to assume there's a 50/50 chance Morita was given the choice back in Fresno between enlisting and an internment camp. A lot of fics write Morita as the team medic, but I'm not entirely sure why. In WWII, medics held a rank of Private, Private First Class, or Technical Sergeant. So, the medic would either have needed to be Morita or Gabe Jones in keeping with this. But there is literally no canon mention of him being any better at triage than any of the others, and he is definitely not a medic by trade. None of them are. The more likely scenario here, because none of them wear the insignia of a combat medic, is that all of the team were equally trained and capable at the most basic of field triage, but the team itself probably flew without a safety net and used the medics from whatever regiment they were shadowing at the time.
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Sergeant James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes (26) - who you will notice is literally the fourth James in a team of 7 men - contracted what can only be assumed to be walking pneumonia on the battlefield of Azzano, and as his condition gets progressively worse in captivity, hastened by the hard labor of the weapons facility, he eventually becomes so weak that he drops several components in front of the officer in charge of the Facility, identified only as Colonel Lohmer. Lohmer beats Bucky like a rented mule, and when he's deposited back in his cage, the other four realize that if he's made to work again the next day, he'll die. They devise a plan to kill Lohmer, which would put one of the kinder Nazi assholes in charge who would allow Bucky to remain in the cages until he was able to recover. Their plan works, crushing Lohmer under a ton of machinery and symbolism and signifying the first time the soon-to-be Howling Commandos had worked together successfully. The soldiers return everyone to their cages after the accident to keep order, and Dugan tells Bucky that he's safe from Lohmer now, with the only punishment being a reduction of the POWs food rations for a week since there was no one specific to punish. Bucky is an ungrateful dick and not only asks Dugan to stop calling him "Jimmy", but graces him with the nickname Dum Dum in the process. Bucky is saved from dying on the manufacturing floor only to be singled out by Arnim Zola and taken to the 'examination rooms'. And we all know what happens there.
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August to Early November, 1943 - Steve Rogers sings and dances his way through over 200 shows and makes several badly conceived films while his best friend is slogging his way through Italy.
November 3, 1943 - Steve disappears behind enemy lines to go find his Bucky.
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November 8, 1943 - The Man With A Plan dramatically re-enters the Allied base camp where Colonel Phillips is fixin' to tear Peggy Carter a new one for losing Captain America over enemy territory. If the Battle of Azzano happened on a goddamn Earth map at the real Azzano in the Province of Udine, and assuming the Allied camp was somewhat close to that area, the march from the factory back to the Allied base camp would have been well over 120 kilometers as the crow flies. Those prisoners were metal af.
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I'm getting that date from the assumption that walking over 120 km back to (supposedly because in reality they'd have needed to walk to goddamn Naples) Allied territory with 400 sick and wounded men would take a few fucking days. An American unit in Sicily in WWII (30th Infantry Division) marched 54 miles in 33 hours across country. But it's safe to assume that the company Steve rescues from Kreischberg would not be moving at top speed, but rather a steady pace that would keep them moving, but not fucking kill them.
The closest thing I can get to this incident is in July of 1944, when the German armies began a forced march of POWs across Germany to delay their liberation by the approaching Red Armies. Groups of 250 to 300 men marched over bombed out roads in a meandering route because they were forced to skirt around various battles, kind of like what our POWs would have to do in enemy territory. The groups would march between 20 to 40 kilometers a day, with very little food, clothing, shelter or medical care to speak of. Using 30 km/day as our benchmark, that's at least 4 days that it would have taken to get back to the Allied encampment. If the Hydra factory went boom on the night of November 3rd, and Steve flounced into camp in daylight, November 8th is a very safe bet.
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November 15, 1943 - Steve pinpoints the Hydra facilities on the map in the SSR bunker in London (which was located in the Cabinet War Rooms in Whitehall) and is given permission to form his own elite special ops unit. Sidenote, the Howling Commandos were never called the Howling Commandos until after the War ended, they were merely called the 107th Tactical Team. Another nickname bandied about in 'non-canon because it contradicts the movie ahahahahahah' was The Invaders, which is probably what other soldiers would have known them as when encountering them. Neither Steve nor Bucky would know what the fuck a Howling Commando even is until they read up on history, and even then neither of them would likely ever think of himself as a Howling Commando.
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Now, in trying to find this date, my inner frustrated historian has begun to weep, because I just cannot find a base in Italy that makes sense for any of these damn movements to have been based out of. The Allies hadn't even gotten through the Gustav Line at this point, which ran across the boot and through the town of Cassino, south of Rome. For them to be in Northern Italy close to the Austrian border, dude. WTF were they doing there? And how did they get in and out?? I mean was anyone really surprised when their straying asses got pounded by enemy forces deep in enemy territory??
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I have no idea how to judge how long it would have taken for the future Commandos to get to London and drink in a pub because there is literally no rational logic to pinpoint their starting location, and therefore no way to guess what modes of transport were even available to them so close to enemy territory. The easiest way to find this date would have been to find out what date Captain America was awarded his Medal of Honor, but . . . even I'm not that good, apparently, 'cause I can't dig up shit. The Medal of Honor ceremony that happens at the same time as this scene would have been at least a week and probably more from the action on the night of November 3rd simply because it took that long for the paperwork to travel back to Washington. It was usually months before soldiers received their Purple Hearts, for instance. But let's assume this was fast-tracked because it's Captain goddamn America. Let's also assume they didn't have Howard Stark fly them back to London in his plane and tell the other 400 POWs to go make like a leaf and fuck a tree or something.
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So the trip back to London probably took at least 7-10 days. We also need enough time to have passed that they expected Steve to get from the front lines all the way back to DC for the ceremony. My first instinct is to say up to a month could have passed when this scene comes around, but a month just seems way too long when looking at the context of the scenes, from the celebratory pub crawl of the POWs to the fact that Steve is being debriefed here, which would have been literally the first concern of an agency whose job is gathering intelligence.
TL:DR version, this could be anywhere from a week to a month later, idfk.
It's safe to assume this is also the night of the pub when Bucky reveals how heterosexual he is not by asking if Steve is going to keep his stage suit for no apparent good reason.
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Mostly I'm putting this date here because it is the day the Allied Expeditionary Force for the invasion of Europe is officially formed. Having the SSR gearing up for - or as a result of - that meeting seems to make a lot of sense.
November 15, 1943 to March 4, 1945 - Steve and the Invaders, often along with other military forces, plow through HYDRA factories like an enraged ex with a John Deere tractor and a bottle of Jim Beam, and also join the larger battle against the Axis Powers on the Western Front. Essentially this period is Band of Broooos: Howling Commandos Edition. This period is where you can really have your fic fun, because canon doesn't tell us fuck all about it.
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Well . . . that’s not necessarily true, though. Through the (paltry imo) Howling Commando montage of the movie, we see at least 10 distinct missions, and in clips from TWS there are hints of a few more; as many as 15 total. There are 6 Hydra facilities on the board, labeled 1-6. #4 was never taken during Steve’s time. But we can assume at least 5 of their missions were blowing the rest up. One was ‘in Poland, near the Baltic’, the other was ‘30-40 miles west of the Maginot Line’, thanks Steve. That doesn’t give us shit, son. But I will try.
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1. A Hydra facility raid, #2. This is the one 30-40 miles west of the Maginot Line, labeled #2 on the map. West, in fact, of Liechtenstein, and southeast of Innsbruck, in a town that begins with RES. I think this is Resia, Italy, and the Reschen Pass (Resia Pass in WW2), which would make sense, tactically. I’d like to point out that they show Bucky entering with the team, show the team running out, show Steve riding out on his motorcycle, and then the place blows up. No Bucky. Take better care of your marksman, boys . . .
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2. An approach with additional military forces through a forest, in the snow. Look at those BAMF motherfuckers. I got no clue what this mission could be, though. This has the feeling of a patrol, rather than a directed attack on anything. Bucky doesn’t even have his rifle.
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3. A direct attack through a forest of exploding trees . . . no snow. This is probably a frontal attack intended to push at the enemy lines. With mortars like that coming at them as they advance, there’s no way whoever they were facing wasn’t dug in on a forward line.
4. This is most likely a harassment mission. They’re shown disturbing the lines of supplies to somewhere, and taking care to be covert, which is . . . not usually how Steve rolls, lbr.
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5. Another Hydra base raid, Base #5. This is shown through only film, with Steve planning an approach to somewhere and a whole shitload of troops mobilizing with them. From where they are, he’s pointing south. God help me. Looking at the map he’s pointing to, the best guess I have based on the coastline is that it shows the northern bits of Belgium, and he’s pointing toward Hydra base #5, which is somewhere in the northeast corner of France, right below the border of Luxembourg.
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6. Seek and destroy mission. This was another battle, not a base. Despite the fact that they’re in rubble, but then . . . most of Europe was rubble at this point, lbr. Peggy pulls a ‘Hydra battle lines’ flag from the map after this mission, so this was about pushing the forward line back. And we know this was the Hydra line, not the Nazi line. The scene we see was likely after the battle itself was over, when the search for the wounded and intel begins; that’s when enemy snipers made their last stand, like the one seen stalking Steve’s oblivious star-spangled ass. Bucky almost kills Steve for saluting at him and giving away his carefully chosen position.
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7. A pitched battle in a town, somewhere. Steve is seen kicking ass and stuff.
8. Cool guys don’t look at explosions . . .  The only reason I am separating these three clips is because the middle one is obviously in a forest, where the other two are in towns. We’ll call them three separate skirmishes. I would imagine all three of these are about pushing back that forward line.
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9. The mega huge tank in the middle of town. I can see the team being sent out just to take care of this thing. Historian sidenote; the Nazis did indeed cook up some monster tanks. Hitler had a size kink. The Tiger II, or as the American GIs called it, the King Tiger, was . . . I mean, you were fucked if one of these rolled up into your path. They were damn near indestructible and they carried a big fucking stick. The problem with a heavy tank is that a Europe that has been bombed back to Creation for several years is a muddy Europe . . . if that Hydra tank wasn’t stuck in 5 feet of mud it was made of aluminum or something.
10. A last Hydra base raid, Base #?. This is shown only through the resulting smoking husk of a destroyed base and Red Skull being a diva. I don’t know which one this was, other than knowing it had to be #1, or #6. I hate to tell Steve, but I’m not sure any of the flags on this map are in Poland near the Baltic Sea, my dude. It would have to be #6 that he was talking about, though. #1 is just northeast of Lübben, Germany, in what appears to now be Briesensee nature preserve.
The only other hints we get at their missions are the clips of footage from TWS. 
11. Hydra Facility #3. #3 is in the south of fucking Greece, near the northwestern tip of the body of water called Maliakos Kopos. There’s a marina in that area, Agia Marina, that would make a very convenient Hydra facility if I do say so myself. Now, this looks like a water landing! And it’s not an ocean landing, so that marina at facility #3 might be the ticket.
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12. I’m going to call this a Hydra Facility Raid. Look at him go. There he go. Again, this is either #1, or #6. idfk anymore.
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13. Prisoners. Cap is seen escorting surrendered German soldiers, It’s notable that they’re not Hydra, so that would be one of the ‘regular’ missions they ran with other troops. It could be part of any of the above missions, though.
14. Clearing out a town left by retreat. Those soldiers are not particularly the kind of alert that possible enemy combatants in the weeds will make you, so that town has probably been cleared.
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15. Troop Transport/Advancement. This is notable because it’s a bridge, and not a little stone bridge, either, it’s a big one. In fact, this is the Ludendorff Bridge over the Rhine. (You can learn more about the capture of this bridge by looking up the Battle of Remagen.) Bridges were kind of a big deal at this stage when the German army was pulling out all the stops trying to prevent the Allied advance. Bridges large enough to convey heavy artillery got blown up but quick. This bridge in particular was front page news when it was captured by the Allies. Unfortunately, we can’t place Steve and his team at the Battle of Remagen, or at the Ludendorff Bridge, because this happened just days after Steve nosedived into the Arctic. So. We’ll call it an MCU bridge! This was either coming back from the front and they were deeper in Allied territory, or more likely after a battle, but on the way to the new front lines, as established by the winning of the goddamn bridge. Doubt this was a Hydra mission, either.
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All in all, Bucky and Steve have 16 months of battle side-by-side. Bucky would have had 20 months total of combat service in the War.
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I'm going to list some real events from the War during this time that the team might have been involved with or nearby for that could fill in some of those non-Hydra missions above, and some things they would definitely have at least talked about. You can skip these if you like, just scroll down to the next bolded bit. I am copying and pasting these because I can:
December 2, 1943: The Germans conduct a highly successful Air Raid on Bari, Italy. One of the German bombs hits an Allied cargo ship carrying mustard gas, releasing the chemical which killed 83 Allied soldiers. Over 1000 other soldiers died in the raid.
January 17, 1944: The first Battle of Monte Cassino begins when the British X Corps attacks along the Garigliano river at the western end of the German Gustav Line.
January 20, 1944: The U.S. Army 36th Infantry Division, in Italy, attempts to cross the Gari River but suffers heavy losses.
January 22, 1944: Allies begin Operation Shingle, the landing at Anzio, Italy. The Allies hope to break the stalemate in south Italy, but they are unable to break out of the beachhead and the line holds until late May.
February 15, 1944: The second Battle of Monte Cassino begins with the destruction of the historic Benedictine monastery on Monte Cassino by Allied bombing. The Allies believed the grounds were used as an observation post by the Germans
February 16, 1944: Germans launch a major counter-attack at Anzio, threatening the American beachhead.
March 15, 1944: The third Battle of Monte Cassino begins. The small town of Cassino is destroyed by Allied bombers.
April 27, 1944: The Slapton Sands tragedy: American soldiers are killed in a training exercise in preparation for D-Day at Slapton in Devon.
May 8, 1944: D-Day for Operation Overlord set for June 5.
May 11, 1944: The fourth battle of Monte Cassino begins led by general Anders of the 2nd Polish Corps.
May 18, 1944: The Battle of Monte Cassino ends in Allied victory. Polish troops of the 2nd Polish Corps led by general Władysław Anders capture Monte Cassino. German troops in west Italy have withdrawn to the Hitler Line.
June 4, 1944: Allies enter Rome, one day after the Germans declared it an open city. German troops fall back to the Trasimene Line. Meanwhile, Operation Overlord is postponed 24 hours due to high seas.
June 5, 1944: Operation Overlord commences when more than 1,000 British bombers drop 5,000 tons of bombs on German gun batteries on the Normandy coast in preparation for D-Day. And the first Allied troops land in Normandy; paratroopers are scattered from Caen southward.
June 6, 1944: D-Day begins with the landing of 155,000 Allied troops on the beaches of Normandy in France. The Allied soldiers quickly break through the Atlantic Wall and push inland in the largest amphibious military operation in history.
June 10, 1944: At Oradour-sur-Glane (a town near Limoges), France, 642 men, women, and children are killed in a German response to local Resistance activities.
June 13, 1944: Germany launches a V1 Flying Bomb attack on England, in retaliation for the invasion. The V-1 attacks will continue through June.
July 3, 1944: The Allies find themselves in the "battle of the hedgerows", as they are stymied by the agricultural hedges in Western France which intelligence had not properly evaluated.
July 24, 1944: Operation Cobra is now in full swing: the breakout at St. Lo in Normandy with American troops taking Coutances.
August 15, 1944: Operation Dragoon begins, marked by amphibious Allied landings in southern France. Elsewhere, the Allies reach the "Gothic Line", the last German strategic position in North Italy.
August 19, 1944: The French Resistance begins an uprising in Paris, partly inspired by the Allied approach to the Seine River.
August 25, 1944: Paris is liberated. The German military disobeys Hitler's orders to burn the city.
September 2, 1944: Allied troops enter Belgium.
September 6, 1944: The "blackout" is diminished to a "dim-out" as threat of invasion and further bombing seems an unlikely possibility.
September 9, 1944: The first V-2 rocket lands on London.
September 17, 1944: Operation Market Garden, the attempted liberation of Arnhem and turning of the German flank begins.
October 18, 1944: Hitler orders a call-up of all men from 16 to 60 for Home Guard duties.
November 1, 1944: "Operation Infatuate", an Allied attempt to free the approaches to Antwerp begins; amphibious landings take place on Walcheren Island. It would become a major supply port for the Allies by the end of the month.
November 20, 1944: Hitler leaves his wartime headquarters at Rastenberg, East Prussia, never to return; he goes to Berlin, where he will soon establish himself at the bunker.
December 16, 1944: The Battle of the Bulge begins as German forces attempt a breakthrough in the Ardennes region. The main object of Hitler's plan is the retaking of Antwerp.
January, 1945 - The only mission the MCU gives real details about comes from the Smithsonian Exhibit's interview with Peggy Carter (which you can watch in its entirety btw). The 'difficult winter, 1945' has to be January, and they were outside Stalingrad, Russia. During - or possibly in the aftermath of - a blizzard, Steve (and presumably the Commandos but fuck those guys amirite Agent Carter?) fight their way through a Hydra blockade that had been there 'for months', and saved half a battalion, over 1,000 men, who'd been penned down behind German lines. That's literally all we've got for mission details, and none of that makes any sense. Like any. At all. Why the fuck were they near Stalingrad?? How did they get to the Eastern Front, STEVEN???
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February 1945 - Bucky falls from a goddamn train in the Alps. There is no resource to tell us how much time passes between Bucky's fall and Steve's supposed death in the Valkyrie. So let me get my history on for a second. On February 17, 1945, the British Special Air Service executed Operation Cold Comfort, a parachute drop raid near Verona, Italy with the objective of blocking the main rail lines through the Brenner Pass by landslide. The Brenner Pass is a mountain pass through the Alps which forms the border between Italy and Austria. Sounds familiar, right? (It's also featured on one of the Captain America covers, Captain America No. 33, 1943).
The operation would ultimately be a failure, but since Schmidt wouldn't have known that, hearing rumors of this operation, or even word that it had been attempted and fearing a second try, this could have been the inciting incident behind why he had Zola hauling his evil ass along that railway at a speed described as 'moving like the devil'. So we can safely put Bucky's fall between February 15 and February 25th. You could also stretch and say it was February 14th, if you are the reborn incarnation of Satan.
Now, by the end of February, the Red Army was sweeping through the northern regions of Poland toward the German border, moving north and west. It's a Russian soldier who finds Bucky in the Alps, so either that patrol was way the hell out of their lane, or . . . Bucky laid there for a while, folks. Seriously, the Red Army didn't even sniff the border of Austria until March 31, 1945 with the Upper Silesian Offensive. Which leads one to postulate that, a. the Russians who found Bucky were lost as fuuuuuck, b. the Russians who found Bucky were a rogue group who defected to Hydra after Hydra declared itself a separate entity from the Axis forces (doubt it), or c. neither Steve nor any of the rest of the team ever actually looked for Bucky's body, even after Steve went down in the Valkyrie, and he laid there for weeks. I honestly choose to believe one of the former, since the latter is just . . . I can't.
[No, you know what? Fuckin......frustrated historian meta addition.]
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It's always bothered me that they might never have looked for Bucky's body, y'know?
I always assumed the arm got ripped off when he hit the side of the ravine. Like maybe he grabbed for or hit a ledge and the speed/height of his fall was just too great and it got ripped off. Because it's not crushed like it would be if he'd landed on it, it's a traumatic amputation. It almost had to have happened during the fall. Which could mean he'd have landed close to the edge, or maybe like hit higher up and tumbled until he was at the bottom instead of freefalling the whole way?
In his flashback, you can see he's still bleeding as the soldiers are carrying him. Bleeding a lot. If he'd been in the water or motionless in the snow for any amount of time, the bleeding would have at least become sluggish. He'd be hypothermic; his body would route blood away from his extremities to protect his vital organs, plus the blood vessels in the wound would be constricting due to the cold. But, if he'd been moving under his own power trying to get to help, it would explain why he's still bleeding; his movement kept the blood circulating where it would otherwise have clotted up.
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In this gif, it looks almost like the blood trail starts just a few meters away. If we take a leap and assume that when they started moving him it jogged him awake, then this scene shows where the Russians found him. Those are trees, aren't they? Meaning he moved under his own power after he landed. Meaning he got the fuck up after falling off that train, and walked through that ravine toward help. What a fucking badass, jfc.
Two things I think we can say with certainty; one, the Russians were definitely searching for someone. He's on a stretcher, which wasn't something a normal patrol would've been carrying, especially over rough terrain. They had it with them for a reason. And two, the Russians weren't there because of Zola. Between Bucky falling and Gabe taking the control room, he had very little time to get off a communication with sitrep and location. And even if he was able to, it would have been to Hydra troops, who would have shown up wearing Hydra gear. And Russians are almost certainly not part of Hydra at that stage in the War.
Those Russian soldiers were probably an Allied search party that was sent out to find Bucky. That would tick off a lot of problem boxes, wouldn't it? It would mean someone - the SSR, the Army - did order a rescue/recovery for a damned war hero like a fallen Howling Commando, and Allied Russian troops were closest or something. It would explain why Russian soldiers were in such a remote area, with a stretcher, when they had zero other reason to be there! It would explain why Bucky is listed as KIA instead of MIA even though they obviously never found his body. It would also explain why Bucky didn't struggle as they were carrying him off; he thought they were on his side, rescuing him.
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My theory after writing all this up? He lost the arm in an impact with the side of the ravine, but contacting the ravine walls also slowed his landing and put him on dry ground. He then got up like a BAMF and moved, either until he found shelter under some trees, or he simply collapsed from shock or trauma or exposure or all of the above. An Allied rescue/recovery party found him, but they were Russian, and they reported him KIA and kept him because they knew he must be enhanced to have survived that sort of fall, cold, and blood loss, and they wanted their own Captain Comrade.
March 4, 1945 - The SSR and other forces raid the secret Hydra bunker and Steve Rogers boards the Valkyrie on his way to getting fridged, literally haha, so Peggy Carter can become a hero . . . good job Captain Cannonball.
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March 15-24, 1945 - The Commandos assist in Operation Undertone, which was part of the Allied invasion of Germany by the U.S. Seventh and French 1st Armies of the U.S. Sixth Army Group. It was a very real operation, so info is easy to find about it if your heart is still in your chest after watching both our boys plummet to their supposed deaths.
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Some time in April probably?? 1945 - Dugan and Morita head to the last known HYDRA facility, Facility #4 bitches!, known simply as the Fortress, located some the fuck where in Austria, with Peggy Carter. They capture HYDRA General Werner Reinhardt and take possession of the first known classified 084, the Obelisk. We don't see the Obelisk again until Agents of SHIELD.
May 8th, 1945 - VE-Day. The remaining five members of the team gather in a pub to toast 'the Captain', suggesting that they did indeed just leave 'the Sergeant's' body rotting in the Alps somewhere, fuck that guy. (It is notable that one of the tie-in books for the movie states explicitly that they toast to both 'the Captain' and 'the Sergeant', so it's probable that they gave each man his own, individual farewell. We just didn't see it.)
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(If you want more timeline! Trying to track the Winter Soldier through both canon and history.)
4K notes · View notes
callunavulgari · 6 years
Text
Scrapbook 2018
Scrapbook for 2018! A reminder, for myself and others-
Italicized titles = enjoyed muchly, bold titles = love, titles with an asterisk* = OBSESSION and titles in (brackets) are re-watches/re-reads. And lastly, strikethough = DISLIKE.
Goals are: read forty-five new books this year, finish six video games, write either 30 fics or 70k total, finish the damn Sabriel AU, and write something original. 
MOVIES
January
(Guardians of the Galaxy 2)
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
February
(LOTR: Fellowship)
(Wonder Woman)
Black Panther
Annihilation
March
The Ritual
Cloverfield Paradox
Pacific Rim Uprising
A Wrinkle In Time
(Star Wars: The Force Awakens)
(IT)
(Star Wars: The Last Jedi)
April
Wolf Children
Moonlight
The Red Turtle
Europa Report
Avengers: Infinity War
May
A Quiet Place
Alien
Deadpool 2
The Conjuring
BOOKS
January
A Tale For The Time Being | Ruth Ozeki
La Belle Sauvage | Phillip Pullman [Fin]
London Falling | Paul Cornell
A Swiftly Tilting Planet | Madeline L’Tengle [Fin]
In Other Lands | Sarah Rees Brennan [Fin]
They Both Die In The End | Adam Silvera [Fin]
Thunderhead | Neal Shusterman [Fin]
The Sun and Her Flowers | Rupi Kaur [Fin]
The Paper Magician | Charlie Holmberg 
February
A Tale For The Time Being | Ruth Ozeki [Fin]
The Diviners | Libba Bray [Fin]
The Paper Magician | Charlie Holmberg [Fin]
We Were Liars | E Lockhart [Fin]
Lair of Dreams | Libba Bray [Fin]
The Tropic of Serpents | Marie Brennan
The Goblin Emperor | Katherine Addison
I Am: Seventeen Brushes With Death | Maggie O’Farrell [Fin]
Norse Mythology | Neil Gaiman [Fin]
Phasma | Delilah Dawson
Caraval | Stephanie Garber
March
The Tropic of Serpents | Marie Brennan
The Goblin Emperor | Katherine Addison [Fin]
Phasma | Delilah Dawson [Fin]
Caraval | Stephanie Garber [Fin]
Tess of the Road | Rachel Hartman [Fin]
Clariel | Garth Nix [Fin]
Seraphina | Rachel Hartman [Fin]
Before The Devil Breaks You | Libba Bray
April
Before The Devil Breaks You | Libba Bray [Fin]
The Tropic of Serpents | Marie Brennan
Salt to the Sea | Ruta Sepetys  [Fin]
The Wicked Deep | Shea Ernshaw  [Fin]
Hamlet | William Shakespeare  [Fin]
Fangirl | Rainbow Rowell [Fin]
The Scorpion Rules | Erin Bow [Fin]
The Thief | Megan Whalen Turner [Fin]
Hear The Wind Sing | Haruki Murakami [Fin]
May
The Tropic of Serpents | Marie Brennan [Fin]
Only Human | Sylvain Neuvel [Fin]
World War Z | Max Brooks [Fin]
The Queen of Attolia | Megan Whalen Turner [Fin]
The Stand | Stephen King
Shadow Scale | Rachel Hartman [Fin]
London Falling | Paul Cornell [Fin]
Goldenhand | Garth Nix [Fin]
PODCASTS
January:
N/A
February
N/A
March
The Bright Sessions (Eps 30-41)
Wolf 359 (Eps 5-8)
King Falls AM (Eps 5-6)
April
The Bright Sessions (Eps 41-52)
Wolf 359 (Eps 8-13)
King Falls AM (Eps 6-7)
Penumbra Podcast (Episode 1)
May
Wolf 359 (Eps 14-49)
The Bright Sessions (53-55)
TV SHOWS BY SEASON
January:
Planet Earth II
Devilman Crybaby
Steven Universe s4
Brooklyn Nine-Nine s1
RWBY s5
(Stranger Things 2)
The Orville
(The X-Files)
The Flash s3
February
The Flash s3
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
The Gifted
The Good Place
The Runaways
AP Bio
March
Voltron s5
(Soul Eater)
Battlestar Galactica
(Sailor Moon)
Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Cards
Bride of the Ancient Magus
Kabaneri of the Iron Fortress
April
Battlestar Galactica
Legion
The Flash
AP Bio
(Yu Yu Hakusho)
Persona 5 Animation
Westworld s2
May
Westworld s2
Legion
The Flash
Lost In Space s1
Persona 5 Animation
Siren s1
Steven Universe s5
VIDEO GAMES
January:
Prey (18 hrs)
Horizon Zero Dawn: The Frozen Wilds (20 hrs, FIN)
Monster Hunter World (8 hrs)
February
Monster Hunter World (25 hrs)
Kingdom Hearts BBS (1 hr)
March
Monster Hunter World (25 hrs) 
Witcher 3 [FIN JFC]
Stellaris
Life Is Strange
April
Life Is Strange
Final Fantasy 12: Zodiac Age
Dragon Age: Inquisition (Dany - 98 hrs; Brienne - 5 hrs)
May
Dragon Age: Inquisition (Dany - 138 hrs - FIN; Brienne - 5 hrs)
SOMA
Witcher 3: Hearts of Stone DLC
DELIGHTFUL FIC
January:
Just the One, Two by Panny | Jessica Jones | Jessica/Trish | 10k They say you should never meet your heroes, but what about when you've been sort of in love with them since they broke your mother's marble sink? 
Daylight by @notbecauseofvictories | Star Wars | Rey/Luke | 3k “Can I ask what you think it is you’re doing?” Luke says. His voice is only a little strangled. The silence that falls in its place is awkward, thick as sand. “Oh,” Rey stutters out. “Is that not—?” “No,” Luke grits out. “Please put your clothes back on.”
run all the lights by @fahye | Captive Prince | Damen/Laurent | 8.5k He’s a slim, too-pretty boy of twenty, and the men of this particular underworld talk about him as though he’s an open flame, a sparking engine near a pool of gasoline: volatile, and not to be handled. Kid’s got balls of sheer fucking steel, Damen’s contact said. Which must be true, because having just lost a race against Damen for pink slips, Laurent looks him straight in the eye and says, “Double or nothing?” in a voice like vodka poured straight from the freezer.
They Say It's Mighty Fine by apocryphal | Teen Wolf | Sterek | 23k "Hello. This is Alpha Vernon Boyd, calling from Camp Remus about—""Derek?" Talia asks, confused. "You're calling about Derek? Is he okay? What happened?""Oh, boy." Melissa blows out a breath. "All right. Is he hurt?""He's been there for two hours, what could he possibly have—" John pauses. "Hang on, Camp Remus? Like the werewolf camp?"
León de mi Corazón by clockheartedcrocodile | The Exorcist | Tomas/Marcus | 16k | Not for the first time, Marcus wishes he were a poet. Tomas drinks up beautiful words like wine, practically thrives on them. He thinks of his own clumsy attempt at a letter, begun and re-begun until the whole thing had been consigned to the rubbish bin. It was laughable.Besides, he thinks, Tomas and Jessica wrote letters because they could not have each other.“You have me,” he says, quiet enough that Tomas won’t wake.
Things Worth Knowing by Femme (femmequixotic) | HP | Drarry | 163k After the Battle, Harry thinks he's left Hogwarts for good, but Minerva insists that all students return for an Eighth Year if they wish to sit for NEWTs in the spring, and Harry needs those NEWTs to go into the Aurors. Draco's just grateful not to be in Azkaban. Or the Manor. He's hoping he can steer clear of Potter this year and grapple with his own problems.
Under the Covers by ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 72k Steve is (maybe) a little bit still in love with Nancy Wheeler and (maybe) trying to figure himself out-- between the night terrors and the babysitting and the general weirdness that is Hawkins, Indiana-- before he graduates.Billy Hargrove fits in there somewhere (probably).
the party never ends by brawlite | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 7k Billy wants a fight from Steve Harrington. He'll do just about anything to get it, too.
February
what a wicked game you played (to make me feel this way) by brawlite, ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | WIP | Billy knew Steve Harrington would ruin him. Steve knew Billy Hargrove was nothing but trouble.They never expected it to end up like this.
don't just stand there by brawlite | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 3.5k Steve kisses a stranger in a club in a desperate attempt to spurn an advance from an unwanted admirer. Turns out, it's not really a stranger at all.
there's nothing wrong with me (loving you, baby) by ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 4.6k | “Mr. Hargrove,It has come to HR’s attention that you have, once again, used company property incorrectly. Please refrain from using the break room as a work out facility during your lunch hour. If you are in need a gym recommendation, I'm happy to provide you some. Remove your weights from the lower cabinets at your earliest convenience.Regards, S. Harrington”This isn’t the first ridiculous email Steve has had to send to Hargrove, and Steve sincerely doubts it will be his last.
in waves by lymricks | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 45k Plant your feet, Billy wants to scream at him. I’m going to bowl you over.
can't you see them? (can't you feel them?) by ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 8k | They're breathing down your neck.
Little Pockets of Upturned Loneliness by SeptemberEndings | Stranger Things | Gen | 5k | Months pass, and nothing bad happens to Will.
isizathu by black_nata | Black Panther | T’Challa/Erik | 8k |  "What do you want?" T'Challa whispers. Almost like he's pleading. All Erik wants to do is wrap his fist around that smooth throat and make him beg some more.
falling for you in hawkins, indi-fucking-ana by LazyBaker | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 31k | Billy gets his shit together. Steve figures some stuff out. They fall in love.
thank god you see me the way you do by LazyBaker | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 6k |  Five times Billy has had sex and one time he made love.
Secrets Make This Town by Oop | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy/Hopper | 5k | Hopper knows that Billy Hargrove sucks cock like he was born for it and he knows Steve Harrington is hung like a pornstar. He knows these by accident.
March
another city (better than this one) by notbecauseofvictories | Star Wars | Gen, Ben Solo & Lando | 6k | “You really should be more creative with your aliases,” Lando says mildly. “I’ve had every anagram of ‘Skywalker’ flagged since the first time you tried to run away from home.”
his hands so cold they shake by plinys | FBAWTFT | Percival/Credence | 4k |  A soul mate is meant to be a blessing, but Percival feels anything but blessed.
We Keep Meeting by scioscribe | Hamilton | Hamilton & Burr | 4.5k |  In which Hamilton finds himself a little more non-stop than even he expected, and Burr doesn't know why he's surprised that even death can't make Alexander Hamilton lie down and be quiet.
There Aren't Any Stars in the Sky by Ambrosia | Star Wars | Reylo | 4k | “Why are you here?” Rey asks. She appears to be meditating. Even his muscles remember the basics. Her eyes are peacefully closed.“Your mind is most open when you Jedi meditate, ‘letting everything go’,” he tells her, striding around in a vicious, predatory circle. “Which you would know if you had an at least halfway-competent teacher.”
Found Wanting by sellertape | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 2k | It didn’t take superpowers to know what Mark wanted him to say. He wanted him to lie. It didn’t take superpowers to get Damien to do what you wanted.
pull out the insides by SpineAndSpite | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 4k | “Stop,” Damien says again, more insistent this time.“I’m not doing it on purpose.” Mark's heart pounds in his ears and he sees Damien’s hands shaking. God. They shouldn’t have started talking about sex. Shouldn’t have filled in the colors and shadows to this pencil outline of a sketch forming between them. They shouldn’t have given it a name.
Life Is Not A Love Song by DetectiveJoan | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 4k |  “Oh, you know the old saying — once bitten, twice mildly paranoid that everyone you’ve ever met is secretly working for the shady government agency that kidnapped you.” Mark's voice is sing-song through the dressing room door.
I Want You To Want Me by Ryuutchi | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 4k | Food, scotch, sex-- I don’t know, Damien; there's a lot of good things in life.
(coming for the king, that's) a far cry by lipgallagher | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 17k |  billy and steve 'pretend' to be gay boyfriends in love for what is essentially just extremely small-time personal gain.
all these to me by lymricks | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 9k |  Three times Steve and Billy share (a bed, a meal, the truth) and one time they share (a virus).
Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches by Reiya | Yuri On Ice | Yuuri/Viktor | 197k | ‘…Of all the rivalries in the world of sports over the years, perhaps none has become so legendary as that of Russian figure skater Viktor Nikiforov and his rival, Japanese Yuuri Katsuki…’
no need to say goodbye by smolsarcasticraspberry | Voltron | Allura/Shiro | 13k | The juniberry tree blossoms every seven years, and when it does, a gateway opens up to another world - a world that Shiro first explores as a child. There, he meets Allura.
(shoot the lights out, hide) till its bright out by lipgallagher | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 50k | The most dangerous thing walking around Hawkins goes by the name Billy Hargrove. And he fucking knows it.
April
so this guy walks into a bar by MasterOfAllImagination | Pacific Rim | Newt/Hermann | 2.5k | “Bourbon,” Hermann says, hooking his cane on the edge of the bar and sliding by degrees onto a stool.“Straight up?” the bartender asks.“Please.” Does he look like the kind of man who enjoys having his nostrils fumigated by undiluted whiskey? “On the rocks.”
Seeing in Color by what_alchemy | Pacific Rim | Newt/Hermann |  The Dr. Geiszler Hermann had found in the publications — printed pages worn with constant handling and tucked into his briefcase for easy access — was an eloquent scientist whose work functioned at a level far above almost anyone else Hermann had ever encountered in the field, and yet he neither patronized his readers nor expressed himself in the inexplicable jargon which so infected much academic work.
Strong Enough by therealraewest | Pacific Rim | Newt/Hermann | 4k |  "I would like to speak to Newt."
Laying Siege by astolat | GOT | Jaime/Brienne | 8k | “Marry me instead,” Jaime said.
Fool by astolat | GOT | Jaime/Brienne | 15k | Jaime didn’t really expect things to go well when he rode north, but after all, they hadn’t been going well otherwise, so it wasn’t that much of a change.
heartstrings by taylortot | Miraculous Ladybug | Marinette/Adrien | 60k |  one of marinette’s rare unlucky days turns into something treacherous. thanks to a certain cat, the real danger passes, but there are other things to be more afraid of. her heart, for example, might be one of them.
Words by astolat | GOT | Jaime/Brienne | 10k |  “So we’ll look for you in the North," Robb Stark said, "coming to pay your debt."
ashes to ashes, dust to dust by romanoff | Marvel | Tony/Steve | 2k | Series | Steve and Tony seek closure with a conversation.
nanna by biggrstaffbunch | Thor | Thor/Loki | 1k |  Thor, after.
just in it for the game by grim_lupine | Thor | Thor/Loki | 6k |  “It's excellent rehabilitation for my image,” Loki says, widening his eyes. “They love you, and because of that they'll trust me. You wouldn't ruin this for me, would you?” 
May
these fragments by Wildehack (Tyleet) | Avengers | Loki/Valkyrie | 4k | “Someone has to survive this day,” Thor grinds out, pressed briefly close to her by the fight.“Someone will,” she tells him.
Make Me by Ajaxthegreat | Star Wars | Hux/Ben Solo | 52k | A genocidal megalomaniac Emperor and a very slutty smuggler/occasional Resistance spy walk into a bar.
cherry pie by brawlite, ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 61k | illy Hargrove lives for summer. Endless sunshine, heavily chlorinated pools, roaming ice cream trucks, and unencumbered freedom? There’s nothing better.Even being stuck in Hawkins can’t ruin the summer for him. He eats it up, devouring every day whole.***
the ghost and good queen val by Wildehack (Tyleet) | Thor | Loki/Valkyrie/Thor | 8k |  “Oh my god,” Korg says. “You did! You saw a ghost!”
Suspicious Minds by astolat | DA | Iron Bull/Dorian, Inquisitor/Solas | 4k | “Hm,” Bull said, thoughtfully. “Something I’ve been curious about. Solas.”“You want to talk about another man now?” Dorian said.
  By The Still Waters by emilyenrose | DA | Fenhawke; Inquisitory/Solas | 83k | Hawke was left in the Fade. Fenris goes looking for him. He doesn't go alone.
Some Things Are Certain by cupiscent | Star Wars | Anakin/Obi-Wan | 7k | Detained far from where he should be by random chance, Obi-Wan meets an unusual slave.
For Better or Worse by DragonBandit | The Bright Sessions | Damien/Mark | 22k |  Wherein Damien and Mark are soulmates, and this changes enough.**
killing me to love you by mostlikelydefinentlymad | The Bright Sessions | Damien/Mark | 2k |  Mark waits by the phone.
give my reflection a break by autoeuphoric (FreezingRayne) | The Bright Sessions | Damien/Joan | 5k | When the bell rings, she almost doesn’t answer. She hasn’t ordered anything and it’s too early for carolers. She does not speak to her neighbors, and she’s not about to start today.Joan gets up and answers the door anyway. Because she wants to.
Try, Try, Try Again by anticyclone | The Bright Sessions | 8k | Joan gets mugged. Damien interrupts. Interrupting is kind of his thing.
sharp shock to your soft side by agivise | The Bright Sessions | Mark & Damien | 22k | The universe is a cruel, unforgiving bitch, and honestly, he's a little sick and tired of it. Sure, he deserves it or whatever, but still, totally uncool, universe. Real poor timing.
Scarier Things by starkraving | The Bright Sessions | Mark & Damien | 5k |  Mark drags Damien back across the country in what amounts to the most karmic reverse kidnapping in history, but stopping to take hipster pics of scenic overlooks will not protect you from the scary stuff lurking in the liminal space behind highway truck-stops.
Patient Intake by starkraving | The Bright Sessions | Joan & Damien | 9k |  ssume Joan takes a less passive approach to Damien’s influence in her life. Assume she’s sitting in her car with the engine running and he’s on the sidewalk in front of her. Assume there’s six months between this moment and the moment she first met him.  
Artifice by buttpatrol | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Hera | 23k | A story told in parts about colour palettes, identity, robot uprisings, sensational trials, space, and messy love.
blow your mongrel mind by endquestionmark | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Jacobi | 13k | The first time Eiffel sees Colonel Warren Kepler — shockingly real, after so many days spent somewhere between delusion and despair — what strikes him most is how still Kepler is.
Calling Out My Name by vlasdygoth | Wolf 359 | Jacobi/Kepler | 2.5k | Five times Kepler called Jacobi a pet name, and one time Jacobi managed to pull it off on him.
and twice as bright by endquestionmark | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Hera | 6k |  “Eiffel.” Very quiet, hardly audible through the echoes. “What is it like?” 
DELIGHTFUL FANVIDS
January:
2017 [Multifandom Mashup]
MCU Films // ♫Can't You Hear Me Knocking (12 Strong trailer version)♫
Arya & Brienne // The Rules Were Wrong
play with fire [Black Butler]
kylo ren & rey【 In a Dream, in a Nightmare 】TLJ spoilers
Stranger Things || Above and Below
Jim Hopper || Do you ever feel cursed?
Stranger Things || Sweet Dreams
February
Stranger Things || Time After Time 
Darth Vader // The Force is strong with you
Game of Thrones || We Live In A Beautiful World
Allison Argent | Look What You Made Me Do
Kylo Ren and Rey l Hearts A Mess
►Stranger Things | Stay Alive
not alone | stranger things
Will Byers || You're home now
March
Voltron | Cosmic Love 
Voltron | Broken Crown
River, MARVEL. [2k]
Voltron | Radioactive
S O L D I E R ll Voltron AMV
Loki // Hustler
a morphine toast
Bucky x Steve || Brooklyn (Go Hard)
Fullmetal Alchemist || Brother
Anime Mix - Legends Never Die [AMV]
Death Parade AMV - Feeling Good
AMV - Crucible of Souls - Bestamvsofalltime Anime MV ♫
[AMV] Transmutayshun - FullMetall Alchemist: Brotherhood
AMV Dazzling Inferno
April
kylo ren || animal
FLESH || Yuri on Ice
Roman&Peter || Piece by piece
◼️ quentin&eliot; give me love
Hannibal/Will - Take Me Back
Kylo Ren // In The End
(Marvel) Avengers | The End
Thomas & Newt ✘ Could I have saved him?
Multifandom || Wake Up
The Avengers | The Final Curtain
(SW) Darth Vader | A Light In Darkness
loki laufeyson | saturn (+ragnarok)
Loki - Birthright
May
Infinity War | I Was Here 
Avengers: Infinity War
MARVEL || Bohemian Rhapsody
River, MARVEL. [2k]
The Expanse || A War Built On Lies
Avengers || Together
MARVEL || Lions Inside (collab w/ djcprod)
COMIC FILMS - Bohemian Rhapsody
Pixar: The Complete Supercut (2018)
Let Us Be Brave
👑black panther👑 
X-Men || Revolution (ft. Ruelle)
DELIGHTFUL MUSIC
January:
Choir & Crickets | Jeff Russo
Black Lung Heartache | Joe Bonamassa
Undiscovered First | Feist
Tribe Society - Kings
MIX - MAURICE RAVEL Bolero
Never Give Up | Sia
Silvertongue | Young the Giant
Vikings Soundtrack
February
Sweet Dreams | Mark Hadley
A Hazy Shade of Winter | The Bangles
White Rabbit | Jefferson Starship
Stranger Things Theme | Kyle Dixon
Go To War | Nothing More
Does Your Heart Break | The Brilliance
Please Speak Well of Me | The Weepies
Smallest Light | Ingrid Michaelson
Flying | Cody Fry
My Friends | Oh Wonder
New Rules | Dua Lipa
Young As The Morning Old As the Sea | Passengers
Never Be The Same | Camila Cabello
Slow Down Love | Louis the Child
Come Together | Gary Clark Jr.
Don’t Think Twice | Utada Hikaru
Your Tongue Like The Sun In My Mouth | Sophie B. Hawkins
&Run | Sir Sly
Giver | K.Flay
Black Panther Soundtrack
March
Daddy Issues | The Neighbourhood
Whatever It Takes | Imagine Dragons
Carry Me Back To Her Arms | Jessica Curry
The Healing | Gary Clark Jr.
These Days | The Black Keys
No Roots | Alice Merton
Susanne Sundfør | The Golden Age
The Blue Whale | Steven Price
Everywhere' by J2
Sinners | Barns Courtney
Sam Tinnesz - Play With Fire (feat. Yacht Money)
Here | Junna
Robert DeLong - Favorite Color Is Blue (Lyric Video) ft. K.Flay
Steve James | Warrior
Hold My Liquor | Kanye West
Sweatpants | Childish Gambino
April
The Sailor Song | Autoheart
Steve James - Warrior (feat. LIGHTS)
Mother Mother - Reaper Man
Hello | Via Audio
Beyoncé | Back to Black
James Brown - It's A Man's Man's Man's World
Emeli Sande - Daddy
Nathan Angelo - Leigh
"In The End" Linkin Park Cinematic Cover (feat. Jung Youth & Fleurie)
May
Black Space/Stand By Me | Imagine Dragons
Dear God | Lawless
Sinners and Saints | Andrea Wasse
Ghost | Natasha Blume
Peter Gundry - Tales of the Night
Metal Gear Solid V Medley: Quiet's Theme / Sins of the Father | Freya Catherine
SOWULO - Yule
WOLVEN STORM ORCHESTRAL COVER (Witcher 3 - Priscilla's Song)
Amulet | Copal
Holding Out for a Hero | Nothing But Thieves
WRITTEN FIC
January:
N/A
February
Everybody's Looking For Something | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 4,790 words | On the third weekend of May during their last year at Hawkins High, Steve Harrington throws a party.Billy crashes it.
taste you on my tongue | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 2,290 words | “You’ve never felt pleasure like it, Steve,” an old girlfriend had told him once, her eyes bright with memory. Steve shrugged. “No vampires here, though.” 
March
Home | Star Wars | Reylo | 1,670 words | “Rey,” he says into the quiet. “Just drive.”
April
hits like a drum | Stargate Atlantis | Mcshep | 3,507 words | “Believe it or not, having something with sharp teeth breathing down your neck is not actually conducive to one’s thought process.” John barks out a loud, abrupt noise that might be laughter, his breath tickling the hairs at the base of Rodney’s neck. “I’d have thought it would be good motivation.”
feed the hunger | Stranger Things | Steve/Billy | 1,792 words | “Thought you wanted to fuck me, Hargrove,” Steve whispers, and presses a sweet kiss to the hinge of Billy's jaw. “Now's your chance.”
Apotheosis | Marvel - INFINITY WAR | Thor/Loki, Steve/Pepper/Tony | 4,450 words | Grief, a story told in three parts.
May
N/A
FANMIXES/GRAPHICS
January
2018
February
We Could Be Heroes
Daddy Issues
March
N/A
April
Newmann 
May
danien: back in black
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