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#I am definitely having a bruh moment right now
bigwishes · 2 years
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Can I have a wish? I love stereotype transformations. Can you use your magic to make me the biggest parody of frat bro? The whole life of partying, beer drinking, working out and horrible manners. The only thing I request is to be DUMB. Like the definition of fucking idiot. Unable to think without someone commanding me like the dumb animal I am.
Well of course. So you wanna be a frat boi? well you'll need to join a frat to do that and I know some guys who are looking for new members, if you'd like to meet them?
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The three blokes standing right in front of you are Danny, Dan and Daniel. You were a little intimidated by the three hulking hunks but when they started talking they were a lot more welcoming than you thought.
"hey bro, looking to sign up to a frat?" "yeah bro, signing up can do awesome stuff like cut your fees down" "hu hu hu hu" "don't mind Daniel, he's errr" "Hungover!" "Yeah hungover!" "hu hu hu hu" "So wanna sign up?" "we'll even chuck in a free body transformation"
You took a moment to think but slashing fees down AND getting someone help get you into shape! That's a deal you were willing to take. You follow Danny through the crowd to the sign up station. You see Dan grab Daniel by the hand and drag him along too. You reached the sign up station and had a board pushed into your chest by Danny. You hesitated staring at Daniel stopped, slouching into Dan drooling all over his chest.
"Don't mind my boyfriend, he has messy hangovers" "mmmm lov yoouuuuuuu"
You were trying to read over the conditions of the sign up but couldn't focus over Danny yelling to bros walking by and the sounds of Dan dealing with his slurping slobbering boytoy. You just signed thinking if there were any issues you'd deal with them in the semester break. As you dotted your signature everything felt strange, the world spun and you fell forward into a wall of solid muscle.
"wo-ah bro, I got you" you felt thick fingers running through your hair as you passed out. ________________________________________
You came too in a dark basement, your first thought was those blokes stole your kidneys and plan to sell them. You body felt weird, a pain all over, tight. You had no idea what was going on until you stepped in front of a mirror. There you were, stripped down to your underwear but it wasn't you....but IT WAS YOU. You don't know what happened, or what came over you but you couldn't help but flex all this new found muscle mass in front of the mirror.
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"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH BROOOOOOOOOOO" WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? you had never yelled or spoken like that before. You tried to think of any other words but every time you spoke out loud some form of bro, bruh, or dude came out of your mouth. Moments later a door opened at the top of the stairs of the basement. Danny, Dan and Daniel were all standing looking down at you posing.
"Enjoying the new bod bro?" "hu hu hu" "Put some clothes on stud, we're goin partyin"
There was something about Danny, the way he was smirking, like he had more planned but fuck you couldn't resist taking this new body for a spin and you we're hoping your new 3 frat bros would help you pick up some guy to stick your new massive meat into.
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At the party your body almost went on auto pilot, downing every kind of booze you could get your hands on, a master of beer pong and flexing for anyone who'd look at you. You were also acting like an absolute ass hole. One guy from another frat came up to ask you how much you bench and your first reaction to him was to burp in his face.
"More than you pipsqueak now fuck off I'm trying to get some hotties"
With how you were acting guys that were originally interested in you were now starting to turn away. You behaviour only got worse as you drank more. You began slurring your words and grabbing onto guys, blatantly asking them for ass, ab or dick picks for your spank bank. You'd never felt like this but it felt incredible. You lifted up your shirt loading it over your pecs and began to parade around demanding some bloke do shots off your abs.
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Eventually Danny came round to you and pulled you into a side room.
"woah there big fella, trying to give away all that prime beef?" "why do you care bro" "dude, all I'm sayin is a body like that aint for playing its for keeping with another hot stud"
Danny bit down on his lip and put a massive muscled hand on your chest.
"Dude! are ya just gonna stand there lookin, or ya gonna...buy a slab of beef?"
Next thing you knew your pants were around your ankles, Danny had slid a condom over your down 8inch meat and began giving you the best hand job of your life.
"Aw, bro, whats the point of a condom for a handy?" "Just wait and see bro"
You were in absolute heaven and it was getting better and better by the second. If this is what being a frat boy was, no if this is what being a fuck boy was you never want to go back. Before you knew it you were seconds away from blowing your load. "Bro take the condom off, I don't want this first load to be held back" "Will you be my boyfriend?" "HUH?!?!, BRO CAN WE DO THIS LATER" "Dude, don't be a fucking pussy and say yes, you'll get a reward" You were thinking if you said yes he'd let you finish on his big muscled chest and abs, the idea of seeing a big lad like Danny covered in your cum would be so fucking hot.
"Yes, yes, I'll be your boyfrieeeennndddd"
The moment you said it you blasted into the condom. It was disappointing, you missed the chance to cover the stud and make him beg for more but something was weird. Your dick was still pulsing like you were gonna blow another load, Your head began to pound, at first you thought it was the booze but it was worse than any drinking headache. You dug your hands into Danny's thick traps for support and he continued to jerk you before you shot another load. The best feeling orgasm of your life, you moaned in ecstasy. Looking down you noticed the clear condom was filled with a pink liquid.
"Wha- what the fuuuuuuuu-"
Your jaw fell open, slack, as your tongue slipped to the edge of your lips. A river of drool quickly ran down you chin and onto your pecs. You let go of Danny and stood there. Shoulder's hunched forward and drool running down your abs. Danny tied the condom off that was filled like a water balloon with the thick pink cream and bounced it in front of your blank eyes.
"Whaddup babe? cum your fucking brains out" "Hu hu hu, yeaaa" _________________________________________ A few months had gone buy and you did nothing more than lift weights, drink, suck Danny's dick and threaten to beat up any guy who hit on your new boyfriend. You'd become nothing more than a moronic fucking asshole frat boy obsessed with servicing his king's every need and today his need was a bodyguard. Danny could handle himself but him and Dan always loved to have you and Daniel close by, They loved the show when their two moron boy toys growl and grumble making every other frat on campus too scared to try and get guys away from their sign up table.
Danny had left you by the pool, to make sure everyone could see you and all your size. Whilst you were intimidating if people got too close to Danny on your own you were no threat. In fact people spent the whole afternoon walking by laughing at you as you'd had the same drink since you sat down but hadn't drunk so much as a mouthful and you couldn't workout how to get your mouth around the straw, let alone work out how to get the drink in your mouth if you ever got your lips around the straw.
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There you go mate, you have become a dumb horny frat himbo, programmed to party, work out and do anything your boyfriend commanded you too.
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themonotonysyndrome · 1 month
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When I listened to the newest Castin audio and after the whole attack, I AGREE WITH MY FULL HEART that Castin still has like racist or like DEEEPP rooted at least like hatred for Imperials as a whole
Calling that one girl a WITCH SO QUICKLY WHEN THE TABLES TURN and then I get the anger to guy trying to KILL us but like when he said IMPERIAL so quickly like my mans didn’t even hold back 😭🙏
EVEN AFTER ALL THIS TIME like Castin still got work to do like I would except after a good 2-3 years of marriage and hours long worth audios he would click something but NAHH
BUT I FULLY AGREE WITH THE LAST ASK 💀 (Anyways BYE MILADY 😊💗)
😮‍💨 And the audio started so cheerfully too! Well... if you ignore the poison bit sdjkfnsdkf
Castin still has some issues from the war and we can now clearly see that he only accepts the Baroness as the EXCEPTION.
"The Imperials are evil! But not my wife. She's awesome."
"Anri's a witch! But because my wife likes her, I'm just gonna keep my mouth shut."
See? If I were the Baroness, I will flinch the moment Castin calls her a Witch. A part of me will always have doubts about our marriage.
"My husband still hates my countrymen. He has the right to feel that way after what my country did to him. But does this mean he also hates me and is lying all this while?"
"Castin calls Anri a witch. Am I just an Imp to him then?"
BRUH, I WOULD'VE UNCONSCIOUSLY AND SLOWLY MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY CHECK OUT FROM MY MARRIAGE AFTER THAT!
ESPECIALLY NOW THAT MY OWN HUSBAND WANTS TO RENOUNCE MY TITLE.
As the Baroness, I would've felt so trapped in my once happy marriage. The pregnancy journey would be soured now. Our kids are definitely gonna be affected by this.
Hmmm... however, this is only Part 1. I have faith that things will get better and Castin will learn a thing or two in Part 2 and Part 3. Our boi is still learning but this time, he better keep an open mind!
Sure, the Empire is far from perfect BUT SO IS FUCKING INTACIA!
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metamorphosisff · 1 year
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|Five| New Normal
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This morning I woke up and decided that almost every piece of furniture in my apartment needed to go. When I first moved into this place it had not been solely mine. Mariah had a lot of say about how she wanted to present our home even when she no longer lived in it. Now I was ready for all reminders of her to be gone. There was no need to reminisce or ponder over what went wrong. The reality was that what we were in this moment were two people who shared a past and would never share a future. When that sinks in, the process of moving on becomes easier. That’s how I found myself roaming the aisles of a furniture store with both of my best friends in tow.
“How in the hell are we supposed to know what looks good?” Aiden asked, exasperated with the task already. “We both have all black and red everything. Typical nigga shit. I don’t know why you won’t just come back to the rivers and the lakes that you used to.”
“Because it’s childish bruh,” I said, eyeing another L shaped couch that was the color of royal blue which reminded me of a pair of Jordan one’s I owned. “I want my space to say grown man not fresh out of college.”
“I can respect that,” Rah says, eyeing the same couch I am. “He might not be useful, but if you like this couch, you can grab two of those box cushion chairs over there that are the same shade and do gray accent pieces with anything else you want in the living room.”
Aiden and I, whip our heads up at him with raised brows. We had been roaming for the past thirty minutes and outside of passing commentary on Aiden’s commentary, Rah hadn’t said any ideas until now. 
He shrugs his shoulders before saying, “My girl love HGTV. That shit always on at her crib and I’ve picked up a few things.”
“More than a few Martha Stewart,” Aiden cracks, plopping down on the couch. “I fuck with the vision though. I think.”
“It’ll look decent, trust me. I know you not trying to do too much or be too simple, so this falls in the middle. Giving off grown man and fresh start,” Rah said.
“You definitely are all up under Keisha’s ass. Out here sounding just like her,”Aiden said, causing Rah to flip him the bird.
“Ignore is ignorant ass,” I said, slapping the back of Aiden’s neck.
“I do, like eighty five percent of the time,” Rah said.
“Man fuck both of y’all. Let me go find someone in a vest so we can get this makeover underway,” Aiden chuckles, popping back up to find an employee. He always has to be moving, idle tasks are hard for him to deal with so we don’t try and stop him.
Instead Rah takes this time to ask, “So I take you selling all of your furniture this morning as you officially being over Mariah?”
Out of the three of us, Rah fell in the middle, he knew when and how to ask questions. Aiden just said whatever came to his mind first and I often took too long to find my words or care in finding the right ones. With this whole situation Rah has not judged me for the length of time it has taken me to move on nor pressure me to start sleeping with any woman within a twenty mile radius. 
“Yeah with her number blocked I feel free. That was the last tether and now I just don’t want any reminders,” I said.
“That usually does the trick,” Rah says with a nod of his head. “Now you can go out and find who you’re really supposed to do this life shit with because it was never her.”
It wasn’t until after we broke up that I found out how much my friends did not like her or us together for that matter. A part of me was not even surprised. Aiden sometimes let his disdain slip and Rah would avoid the topic of our relationship at all costs. 
“How did you know?” I asked genuinely. I had been so deep in love that I missed or completely ignored the signs that something was off with our dynamic.
“She only liked fractions of you. Your masters degree, your professor title but the heart of who you are? She hated. She didn’t like you for real but held on because you look good on paper,” Rah said, putting words to what I had been feeling.
I nodded my head. “You’re right. I guess I always thought I could make her like those parts of me with time.”
There was no such thing as the perfect relationship and perfection wasn’t something I sought either. I merely thought that Mariah and I would have to work a little harder but over the years it became clear that we weren’t working together.
“You an optimistic nigga by nature X, ain’t nothing wrong with that but sometimes you have to take things at face value. There isn’t always a deeper meaning behind someone’s actions. It’s usually shallow as a motherfucker,” Rah said.
“That’s hard for me to do but I’m working on my discernment now. We live and learn,” I said.
“And even when we don’t, we have people to keep us accountable. Don’t sweat it. Now let’s go rescue that poor sales lady from Aiden’s dumbass,” Rah said, nodding in the direction Aiden was, trailing behind a beautiful woman wearing a vest with the store’s logo on it. From the look on her face, she was two seconds away from calling security.
“This nigga,” I muttered as we headed in that direction. “He had one job.”
“You knew deep down he wasn’t really about to be any help,” Rah chuckled.
“Got me there.”
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I’m in my office combing through emails, sending updates to parole officers, judges, and lawyers. I have twenty minutes left to wrap this up before taking my next group out when I hear a knock on my door. When I look up, it’s the last person I ever expected to stand in my doorway. My eyes quickly rove over her frame. Today Jamila’s braids are pulled into a half up and half down style. She’s wearing khaki cargos and a sage green t-shirt that has the word dreamer written in bubbly cursive across the chest. Her eyes travel around the small space before meeting my eyes.
“Hey,” I greet, waving her in. “An unexpected but pleasant surprise. What’s up?”
We’ve texted on and off since last week's meeting but I’m careful not to be overwhelming with her. Our growing friendship is out of her norm and I’ve seen that coming on too strong triggers her fight or flight response. I kept it chill with funny memes or interesting articles I thought she might find interesting too. Her responses would range from short answers to multiple depending on the topic but she had yet to hit me up first. Had yet to seek me out. Until now that is. 
“Nothing, I uh actually got here early for once so I thought I’d pop in,” she says, taking a seat in one of the two cushioned folding chairs across from the desk. 
Things at HH weren’t glamorous as we were not one of the top non-profits but we made the best out of what we were given. 
“Something tells me you have something on your mind,” I said, as she got settled. 
Nodding her head she lets her gaze land on mine. I’ve observed direct eye contact is her thing unless her feelings are involved. Otherwise, she’s locked in on me as she asks, “The meeting…you said you started it. Why?”
“Sometimes I can’t talk to my friends. One is emotionally immature and the other, emotionally avoidant. I’m the only one who likes to try to regulate how I’m feeling,” I explained, as I tried to search for more context after seeing the unspoken confusion written across her features. I needed to show her the purpose of the group outside of my needs.
“I wanted to be able to talk to people around my age who also wanted to talk and have their feelings validated, making it easier to move on from the little and big annoyances of life. A lot of groups tend to be for trauma related issues but there aren’t so many for regular everyday people to commune.”
“How does talking about things help you?” she asked next, brows scrunched but not in their usual way. There is no attitude behind this expression, merely curiosity that swirls behind her chestnut gaze. I know my responses will probably determine if she ever shares in a group or if she ever returns. 
“I’m somebody that overthinks every interaction because I don’t want people to be around me and have bad experiences. It’s unrealistic but it’s who I am. When it comes to my personal shit it’s ten times worse. It helps to workshop my thoughts instead of having them constantly play in a loop in my head. It also helps to have people who aren’t close to the situation. I get unbiased feedback which is invaluable,” I replied.
“That is a big draw but I don’t know. I grew up not telling my business for survival reasons so to go against that feels unnatural,” she mused, twirling the end of a braid around her finger absentmindedly.
“Well you don’t have to tell allll of your business,” I chuckled, causing her to smirk. She’s hell bent on not smiling but I don’t make it easy for her. “Just what’s relevant. What will make you feel better.”
“Is feeling better after sharing guaranteed?” she asks.
“Being that nothing in life is, no. Sometimes I walk away even more confused but that’s okay. Life isn’t in black and white, it’s the gray areas that kick our asses,” I said.
“You speak like a walking motivational poster,” she says, causing me to laugh out loud.
“I’ve been told I’m a tad optimistic a time or two,” I said. 
“That wasn’t a shot at you, just an observation,” she adds quickly.
“I know,” I grin.
“How did you get so comfortable with being so open all of the time?” she asks, looking from the braid wrapped around her finger towards me.
“My Grandad always encouraged us to say the hard things because in his words ‘The truth might not be pretty but it’s better looking than a lie’ and hearing that growing up stuck with me. It’s less about me being open and more about me getting my point across,” I said.
She nodded her head again, taking in my words although I could tell by the pensive look on her face she wasn’t quite sure how to respond to them. It was time to lighten the mood.
“My turn to ask you a question,” I said, drumming my fingers on the desk.
Skepticism overrode her features then as she sat up straight. Her eyes squint as she says, “Go for it.”
“What do you think the best episode of SpongeBob is? I’m in a debate with my little sister. Personally the Krusty Krab pizza episode got it hands down but she talking about the episode where he ripped his pants,” I said, causing the sides of her mouth to lift as she looked off to the side in a futile attempt to stop the smile that was growing.
She thought I was going to ask something personal because I had been doing all of the sharing but I knew not to have that expectation. Trust didn’t come easy to her and I wanted to earn her trust in me over time. There was only so much words could do in this case anyway. Jamila needed to see.
Braids swish back and forth softly as she shakes her head.“Both of you are wrong. It’s the marching band episode.”
“That’s also a classic but I don’t know if it’s touching the pizza episode,” I said.
“Sounds like you and your little sister are close from what you’ve told me so far,” she said. 
“As close as I can be to a fourteen year old. Sometimes she feels more like my kid than my sibling but that’s because I’d do anything in the world for her,” I reply.
“I know the feeling, trust. You see the handful that Papi is,” she says, eyes softening as she talks about one of the two people who know her the best.
“He’ll grow out of it. I used to be just like him at that age,” I said.
My family used to call me The Bodyguard with the way I would look after Sabrina and her sister Cheyenne. I didn’t like anyone around my older cousins so I knew how Papi was feeling. I was unknown, therefore a threat until he deemed I wasn’t.
“Oh Lord, I can only imagine the nuisance you might have been,” she says, causing me to chuckle. “Well if he grows up to land a good career like this, I suppose I can overlook the pain in the ass phase.”
“Wait…is that a compliment I hear?” I asked with a raised brow. “Be still, I think pigs are starting to fly.”
“Did you also hear the pain in the ass part?” she asks with a playful roll of her eyes.
“I’m choosing to focus on the positive. Keep up. So what is it you like about me again?” I ask.
“See now you doing too much which means that’s my cue to leave,” she chuckles as she pushes up to her feet. “I’m going to wait outside by the van.”
“You can admit that I’m growing on you. You won’t melt, I promise,” I tease.
“There you go being corny, ruining the moment,” she smirks, her eyes bright as if she would laugh if there weren’t the risk of others hearing.
“There you go acting like you don’t like it,” I countered, catching her gaze as she paused by the doorway.
Looking over her shoulder, she tosses a barely audible, “Maybe.”
I can’t call her on it because she disappears into the hallway the moment the word leaves her lips. It doesn’t matter though, I heard her clearly. I don’t understand fully why it makes me as happy as it does but I don’t want to pick it apart. I’m learning to live in the moment and see where life takes me. Right now I’m on a road that leads to Jamila and I’m intrigued at what I’ll learn along the way. As I gather my clipboard and keys to head out to the van myself, I think of more ways to turn that smirk into the smile she fights so hard against in my presence.
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Text
Stranger things incorrect quote generator (feat. The Sapphic senate, The party, the Byers-Hopper family, Scoops Troop and random shit 👌)
Pt 4
Sapphic Senate
Chrissy: H-how do you ask someone out?
Robin: Well, first-
Nancy: Don't ask them, they asked me out in a McDonalds parking lot.
Chrissy: ...And you said yes?
(ofc she did, to both Robin and Nancy)
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Chrissy, planning a group disguise: You cannot be Blake Bortles.
Robin: Fine! Then I’ll be Jake-
Nancy, under their breath: Don’t say Jortles.
Robin: Jortles! And I work at the molotov cocktail department.
(Molotov Cocktail let's go 😩)
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Chrissy: HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE!
Chrissy: *aggressively throws water bottles*
Vickie: Uh... what's up with them?
Robin: They're trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us.
Chrissy: I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU!
Nancy, crying: It's working.
(Nancy needed that 😪)
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Nancy: Chrissy you can’t move in with Robin.
Chrissy: Why not?
Nancy: Well, um, how are you going to feel when they see you without any makeup?
Chrissy: I’m not wearing makeup right now.
Nancy: Holy crap, you’re beautiful.
(Nancy was jealous at first, also yes she is 🥺✨)
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Nancy: You’re just being paranoid. Again.
Robin: When have I been paranoid?
Nancy: Um, when you first met Vickie you thought they were an undercover cop…?
Robin: No one has a wart that big, I thought it was a surveillance camera!
Nancy: And last year you were sure Chrissy was a mermaid!
Robin: They hate wearing shirts! COINCIDENCE?!
*Later, when Robin’s theory is proven wrong*
Nancy: Do you have anything to say for yourself?
Robin: I still think Chrissy is a mermaid.
(She probably is tho 👀 *gasp* Mystical Creature AU or smth and Chrissy is a mermaid 👍)
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Vickie: Did you buy eggs like I asked?
Chrissy: Even better!
Vickie: What the fuck did you-
Chrissy: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.
(She 100% brought a cow once too for the milk)
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Nancy: If you water water, it grows.
Chrissy: ...What.
Vickie: They've got a point.
(she does)
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Vickie: I’m in love with you.
Chrissy: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.
Vickie: I know.
Chrissy: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-
(They definitely had a prank war)
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*The squad is playing a team sport*
Nancy: Are you upset you don’t get to be on the same team as Chrissy?
Vickie: Have you ever played a game with Chrissy?
Nancy: No…
Chrissy: Have you ever been trapped in a cage with a wolverine?
*Meanwhile, on the other side of the field*
Chrissy, chasing Robin: I SAID FASTER! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORD “FASTER” MEANS? IT MEANS MORE FAST!!!!
(leave Robin alone! She said it took her 6 months longer to walk than other babies!)
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Nancy: We call that a traumatic experience.
Nancy, turning to Robin: Not a "bruh moment".
Nancy, turning to Vickie: Not "sadge".
Nancy, turning to Chrissy: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO".
(these fit perfectly)
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Vickie: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.
(that's her personality right there and I love it)
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Robin: Why are you late?
Nancy: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness.
Robin: Overslept?
Nancy: Overslept.
(Vickie is like "That's why I don't set alarms" or smth) 😌
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Robin: You can't wake up if you never got to sleep.
(Robin, go to sleep, pls😪)
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Robin: Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight.
Vickie: But are you shuffling?
Robin: Everyday.
Nancy: What language are you two speaking??
(Robin and Vickie are just Vibin' ✨)
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Nancy: I feel like everyone on this island is suspicious, Robin. Except you!
Robin: But Nancy, I think you're suspicious!
Nancy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Oof, heartbroken 💔 such betrayal 😔)
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Chrissy: Be right back, gonna hit the toilet for a quick power sob.
(too soon?)
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Nancy: Vickie taught me to think before I act.
Nancy: ...So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured that I thought about it and am confident in my decision.
(That's one of the differences between the Responsible Sapphics here)
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Nancy: How late were you up last night?
Chrissy & Robin, in tandem: Me?
Nancy: No, not you two. You stay up late all the time.
Nancy, to Vickie: You.
(because of all nap roulette lol)
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Nancy: Thought I was meowing back at my cat for the past hour, but it was just me and Robin meowing at each other from different rooms in the house.
(So Robin started it is how I read it)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nancy: Why are you burning our marriage certificate!?
Robin: Good luck trying to return me without a receipt.
(I feel like Nancy has made a copy of it, she somehow knew that something was gonna happen)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: I love saying 'fuck me' because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly.
(Chrissy and Vickie would say something about how Nancy will or 'i don't wanna get on Nancy's bad side' or just 'no thanks' idk about Nancy tho I'm torn between either 'gladly' or her getting flustered)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Chrissy: *pulls back the curtain while Nancy is showering*
Chrissy: Hey did we - stop screaming it’s me - did we run out of Cheerios?
(Chrissy does it to everyone, stay safe 😬)
Bonus:
Robin running into the bathroom: I heard screaming what's wro- *faints*
Nancy: *concerned* Robin!?
Chrissy: *confused* I thought she already saw you naked?
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: *watching their house burn down*
Robin:
Robin: *starts filming* Waddup, guys, welcome to my vlog, today's topic: how to get away with accidentally committing arson because you forgot Spaghetti O's cans are metal and thus non-microwavable! Step one: deny everything.
(this was the start of them going to be Roommates 👍)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nancy, washing the dishes: Who the fuck used this pan??
Nancy: Wait. I the fuck used this pan…
Robin: It was you the fuck.
Nancy: It was I the fuck…
Vickie: Who cooks rice in a pan?
Robin: They the fuck.
(I just loved that 'I the fuck' 😂)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Vickie, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it-
Robin, whispering: Should we call the exorcist?
Chrissy, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick.
Nancy, appalled: Call the exorcist.
(Perfection)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: Like they say, "If you can't beat them, curl up in a ball and protect your organs."
(I- this reminds me of a ronance fic I read damn)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nancy, at the slightest provocation: I came into this earth screaming and covered in someone else's blood and and I'm not afraid to leave the same way.
(Don't make her your enemy)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nancy: *raises eyebrows*
Robin: Put those back down!
(is she surprised or why she raising her brows?)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nancy: Your lover doesn't have the mental strength to caramelize onions.
Chrissy: Your lover thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions.
Vickie: Who's fucking caramelizing onions? Have you sociopaths forgotten that apples exist?
Robin: Do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions.
(I don't understand what is going on)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?
Chrissy: Milfs.
Vickie: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.
Robin: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???
Nancy: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.
Nancy: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.
Vickie: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.
Robin: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—
Robin: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!
Nancy: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?
Chrissy: What? No! It isn't!
Nancy: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!
Vickie: Nancy...
Nancy: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!
Vickie: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.
Nancy: ROBIN, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!
Robin: The word milf has been ruined for me.
Chrissy: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!
Vickie: Y'all are dumbasses.
(Chrissy and Vickie definitely call Karen a milf (in front of Nancy sometimes) and were surprised they didn't die lol)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: I have yet to encounter a problem where a sword didn't factor into the solution at least in some way.
(let👏Robin👏have👏a👏sword👏)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
[The Byers-Hopper Family]
Hopper: How many children do you have?
Joyce: Biologically, legally, or emotionally? Because there is a difference.
(She is everyones mother, like Steve but an actual mom)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El, reading a recipe: Beat three eggs?
Hopper: It means like in hand-to-hand combat.
El: Ohhhh-
Joyce: Both of you get out of this kitchen.
(Canon)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: I’m sad.
Jonathan : Don’t be sad, because sad backwards is das.
Jonathan : And das not good.
(This is literally the S2 scene, I love Jonathan being a good brother✨✨)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: You’ve got to learn to love yourself.
Hopper: But don't you hate yourself.
Will: Yeah, but this is about you. Stay focused.
(will 😔)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Hopper: What is this!?
Joyce: That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend.
Hopper: Ow! Make it stop!
Joyce: Surrender to your kindness, Hopper. It’s nice to be nice.
Hopper: Your guilt is strong, my friend. But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!
(S1 or smth idk)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Joyce: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?
Hopper: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.
Will: Three of us saw it, Hopper. How do you explain that?
Hopper: *points at El* Sleep deprivation. *points at Will* Paranoia. *points at Jonathan * Delusional personality disorder.
(best family trip ever 👍)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Hopper: Yes, I'm adopting Will and you cowards can't tell me no!
(I had it once with El but I forgot to copy paste it, but this is cute too🥺)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: *eating a cinnamon roll*
Hopper: Cannibalism.
El: *confused chewing noises*
(Looks like a cinnamon roll, could kill you)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Joyce: I mean, sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.
(yes, you have a cute smile 🥺)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Joyce: Why do you think I don’t like you? I do. I would kill for you.
Joyce: Ask me to kill for you.
Hopper: ...First of all, calm down-
(She kinda wouldn't but also would 🤔)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
*The gang's thoughts on stabbing*
Jonathan : Would never stab anyone.
Joyce: Would stab someone in retaliation.
Will: Yells "I won't hesitate, bitch!" first.
Hopper: Would stab without warning.
El: Would stab as a warning.
(I feel like it couldn't fit better, maybe Joyce and Jonathan switch ig)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Hopper walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Joyce, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.
Joyce, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)
(apparently the generator loves jopper, lots of good Jopper quotes. love them)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: ...This is one of those moments where it doesn't really matter what I have to say, isn't it?
(this sums up S3 and S4 👍)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Joyce: I don’t even use tubberware anymore.
Hopper: What are you saying? Say it again.
Joyce: Tubberware.
Hopper: Say it again. Slow.
Joyce: Tubberware.
Hopper: Slow, very slow - actually, say the first syllable.
Joyce: Tub.
Hopper: Wrong.
Joyce: What do you mean, wrong?
Hopper: I thought I caught that. You’re saying tub. It’s P.
Joyce: What are you talking about?
Hopper: Tupperware. Tupper.
Joyce: It’s tupper!
Hopper: It’s tupper, always has been, always will be.
Joyce: I thought it was tubberware because it kind of looks like a tub.
(I love you Joyce✨❤️)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
[The Party]
Max: El kissed me!
Lucas: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!
Max: It was unbelievable!
Lucas: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!
Will: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Lucas, get the wine and unplug the phone. Max, does this end well or do we need tissues?
Max: Oh, it ended very well.
Lucas: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!
Will: Okay, alright, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?
Max: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.
Will: Ohh... So, okay, were they holding you? Or were their hands on your back?
Max: First they started out on my waist and then they slid up and then they were in my hair.
Lucas and Will: Ohhh.
*meanwhile*
El eating pizza in their house: And, uh, and then I kissed them.
Mike: Tongue?
El: Yeah.
Dustin: Cool.
(this was the first thing of them combined and I love it 😂✨ #Elmax also the groups 👌)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: Why does everyone want to kill Mike?
Max: Because, goddamnit, have you seen them? Their neck looks so snappable.
(the best of frenemies ✨🥺)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: Where have you been all day?
Mike: Oh, just dealing with things way beyond my maturity level.
(accurate)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.
(Her Moms are watching her 👀 so she can't drink alcohol)
Bonus: (also from the generator)
Max: I drink to forget but I always remember.
Lucas: You're drinking orange juice.
(well she just said drink, she didn't say what she drank 👀)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: So, Mike, do you have a crush on anyone?
Mike: The only crush I have is this crushing anxiety
Bonus
El:
Mike: Also Will
(Byler is canon ig)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Lucas: I hope you have an explanation for this.
Mike: We have three actually-
Will: Pick your favorite.
(Lucas catching Mike cheating or what is going on?👀)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Teacher: Your child was in a fight.
Mike: Oh no, that’s terrible!
Will: Did they win?
(Honestly, I feel like this fits, also set in the future ofc)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they’re loved. Will has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for them.
Mike: By forcing them to have fun at a party that they don’t want to be at?
Dustin: I knew you’d understand.
(Will doesn't want a party and Mike is trying to stopped them from throwing one)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: Time sensitive question how to flirt with boy.
Will: Throw rocks at him.
Mike: Hot Dogs.
Max: Kill him.
Dustin: Thanks guys.
(maybe max killed Lucas and that's why he isn't here 👀)
Bonus:
Mike: You're way of annoying me is the same way you are flirting?
Will:
Max: is he serious?
Dustin: omg
Mike: what?
Will shaking his head: How oblivious can a person be 😪
Also Will obliviously eating the Hot Dog Mike gave him:
Max: They are both idiots
Dustin: yeah
(i feel like will wouldn't be oblivious tho, just not believing that Mike likes him back)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Mike: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.
Will: Oh. We're going out?
Mike: Wh...
(Will no)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: Goddamn it, the printer broke while printing out Max's birthday invitations.
Lucas: Well, what are they supposed to say?
Dustin: "Max's birthday".
Lucas: So, what do they say instead?
Dustin: "Max’s bi".
Lucas:
Lucas: Works out either way.
(I love that it's Lucas saying that)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Mike: Do you ever get pre-annoyed? Like you already know someone is going to piss you off?
Lucas: What? No, I—
Max: *enters room*
Mike: *jaw clenches*
(✨🥺Frenemies🥺✨)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: There are three ways to handle a difficult situation. The right way, the wrong way, and the Mike way.
El: Isn't that the wrong way?
Will: Yes, but it's faster.
(affectionately)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: Regular soda is too sweet!
El: Diet soda has a weird after taste!
Will: No! Ugh, oh my god. Diet soda is THE BEST! It doesn't have sugar! It's SPICY!
El: It has other weird stuff in it! I'll take REGULAR sugar in my REGULAR soda!
Will: It's SO SWEET like it's a dessert though! Diet feels more like a drink!
El: I'm going to physically attack you.
Will: Which is better, Mike?
Mike: Oh, I usually drink water!
El: Wha- NO!
Will: DISGUSTING!
(i love this so much)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Mike: So, did everyone learn their lesson?
El: No.
Will: I did not.
Max: I may have actually forgotten one.
Dustin: Also no.
Mike: Oh good, neither did I.
Lucas: *Exhausted sigh*
(Lucas is so done lol)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
*Max is telling a story*
Lucas: Wow, Max, this story has everything! Action! Adventure! Romance!
Will: Romance?
Lucas: I have a crush on them.
(That's adorable, he's such a dork)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will, looking over Max’s shoulder: You can draw?
Max, stopping what they were doing: You can speak?
(I feel like this is canon lol)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: Watcha doin?
Dustin: Stealing my neighbour’s cat.
Max: Scandalous.
Max: Can I help?
(Rip mews 😔)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED!
Max: BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF COMFORT YOU SUPPLY!
Dustin: Max just threw a tantrum about a chair.
Dustin: I just won Max Tantrum Bingo.
(Ginger snaps 😬)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: I hate taking off my glasses, because without them, my vision goes from Full HD all the way down to buffering at 240p and I just can't handle that.
(if she still has her vision it would definitely be fucked so yes, also I relate so much)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE!
Dustin: *aggressively throws water bottles*
Mike: Uh... what's up with them?
Will: They're trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us.
Dustin: I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU!
El, crying: It's working.
(naww, El 🥺)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: Who wants to make fifty bucks?
Mike: How?
Dustin: I need someone to take the fall.
Mike: What did you do?
Dustin: I can't tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked.
Will, from the other room: Oh my god.
Dustin: ...
Will: OH MY GOD!
Mike: Make it a hundred.
Dustin: Deal.
(Dustin probably did something with one of his drawings.. And because Will is kinda a simp he'd not be that hard on Mike)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: I'm not doing to well.
Dustin: What's wrong?
El: I have this headache that comes and goes.
*Max enters the room*
El: There it is again.
(S2 Elmax)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: El is not a morning person. Or a night person. There’s really only about seven minutes a day you are fun to be around.
El: The best part is you never know when they’re coming.
(I just love this cause 7/11...)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: You have an impressive pain tolerance.
Will: Thanks, it's the trauma.
(well, there is more trauma coming, honey)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Mike: How petty can you get?
Dustin: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.
(I wonder who he argued with)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: If any person here knows of any just cause or impediment why these two should not be joined together in holy matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace.
Will: Yes! I do. One of the partners is already married! They married me three years ago. And don’t let them deny it! I’ve got the marriage certificate to prove it!
*Dustin turns around to face them*
Will: Oh... sorry. Wrong church.
(He meant to go to M*leven's wedding)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
*In the chip aisle at Walmart, doing a late-night grocery run.*
El: *Minding their own business, looking for Eggos*
El: *Finds Eggos.*
Max, to Dustin: See, they know what they're here for. They know what they're doing. Be more like them. Make a decision, Dustin!
(I just found it funny and change the other thing to eggos, and Max is also just admiring El)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?! HE COULD HAVE HAD HOPES AND DREAMS, HE COULD HAVE HAD A FAMILY!!!
Max: El-
Max: It- it was just an ant-
(oop)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: Here you go, El, a nice hot cup of coffee!
El: It's cold.
Max: A nice cup of coffee.
El: It's horrible!
Max: Cup of coffee.
El: I'm not sure if this even IS coffee.
Max: C U P.
(S2, Max trying to be nice to El)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
[S1]
Lucas: Start talking!
El: Well, I-
Lucas: Shut up!
(good old days)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Lucas: I’m going to hell.
Max: Probably.
Lucas: I'll pick you up?
Max: *nodding* Carpool
(Lucas could never go to Hell ✨)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: Hi.
Lucas: Hey, did you do what I said? Did you tell them?
Will: I did.
Lucas: And what did they say?
Will: “Thank you.”
Lucas: You’re totally welcome. What’d they say?
Will: They said, “Thank you.” I said “I love you” and Mike said, “Thank you.”
(S5 basically?.. Also Lucas 🥺✨)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Lucas: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.
(such a dork)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt.
Lucas: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.
(The question is, does max have fuzzy socks? 👀)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: I'm so tired of this life. I want to be a roomba. I want knives taped to me. And I want to be set loose.
(just gonna let it stand there)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Max: You seem familiar... have I threatened you before?
(no, but I wouldn't mind- I mean what?)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
El: When I see initials carved into a tree with a heart I think it’s so romantic. Two lovers on a date... one of them carrying a knife for some reason.
(Imaging Mike making one for him and El and El still using it but for Elmax)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: Say no to drugs.
Dustin: Say yes to drugs.
Dustin: It doesn't matter if you say yes or no to drugs, cause if you're talking to drugs... then you're on drugs.
(he and Robin are smart)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin, after getting a library card: Now I know what true power feels like.
(Now you know 🌠)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Will: I honestly feel like some of our conversations here are almost word-for-word accurate to the generator.
Lucas: Yup.
El: Maybe the generator is watching us.
Will: Wouldn't that imply this conversation will be added?
Will: ...
Will: Wait—
(I love the fourth wall break 😭❤️❤️. Also yes, some are very accurate!)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
[Scoops Troop]
Steve: Are you ever going to listen to me?
Erica: Yes. Absolutely.
Steve: When?
Erica: When you're right.
(She ate and left no crumps)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: When you've been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop thick skin.
Erica: Navy blue isn't your color.
Robin: Navy blue brings out my eyes you prick! *Chases after Erica*
(She looked amazing in her uniform 😌, how dare you insult her Erica 👀)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done?
Russians: *sighs*
Russians: I killed a man.
(I added Russians and this is the only good one)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Dustin: *sees someone doing something stupid*
Dustin: What an idiot.
Dustin: *realizes it's Steve*
Dustin: Wait, that's MY idiot!
(Canon)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: The first time Steve opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside they yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"
(he's a dingus)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Steve: Question. When they shot Bambi's mother, did you find that a sad moment...at all?
Robin: I'm sure she's mounted on a nice wall in a fine home somewhere.
(well Damn)
Bonus:
Steve: First the spider thing now this. What is wrong with you.
(It feels accurate)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Steve: Don’t go picking a fight with me. I could make your life difficult.
Robin, sarcastically: Wow. I wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life.
(Robin angst let's go ✨)
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[The Almost and Adult adults]
Steve: Have you done this before?
Robin: Well, Steve, it's like if you read the script you come better prepared.
Joyce: That's not what we do in the US, we don't read things.
Steve: I don't read, Robin.
(Waddup I'm Steve, 19, and never fucking learned how to read)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Jonathan : I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan.
Murray: We could attack them with hummus.
Jonathan : I stand corrected.
Murray: Just keeping things in perspective.
(good idea)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Hopper: What? I'm not aggressive!
Murray: Last Tuesday, you wacked me with a pair of crocs and stole my chocolate chips?
Hopper: Survival of the fittest, bitch.
(You kinda are tho 👀)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Hopper: Where is Enzo?
Joyce: I'll do you one better, who is Enzo??
Russians: Here's a better question, why is Enzo?
(Omg wait another Russians one and it's perfect lol. Also I know his name is not Enzo)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Murray: When do you usually go to sleep?
Jonathan : Whenever I collapse is entirely up to the gods.
(yuh)
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Jonathan : What situation is not instantly improved by the addition of fishnets, I ask you.
Robin: Being a fish.
Jonathan : Well, shit.
(I want them to be friends)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Hopper: I really like Eminem.
Jonathan : I prefer skittles.
Joyce: They are talking about the rapper.
Jonathan : Why would they eat the wrapper?
(Jonathan is high)
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Nancy: You don't think I can fight because of my gender!
Joyce: I don't think you can fight because you're in a wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Murray can fight in that dress either.
Murray: Perhaps not. But I would make a radiant bride.
(yes you would! AAAH, Canon 😭❤️)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Jonathan : Hey, are you okay?
Robin: Yeah.
Jonathan : You don't look okay...
Robin: Then stop looking.
(S3 interaction)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Steve: If I say I love you, will you say it back?
Nancy: Yes.
Steve: I love you.
Nancy: It back.
*Later*
Murray: Why is Steve crying face-down on the floor?
(Yes yes, perfect, I love it, Canon, let's go, Good game Nance! He should have seen it coming, Damn, I love her, gaslight gatekeep girlboss idk)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nancy: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body.
Robin: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot.
Nancy: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!
Steve: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from...
(idk if they are high or sober)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Robin: I’ve invited you here because I crave the deadliest game...
Steve, nodding: Knife Monopoly.
Robin: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is.
(Russian roulette tho)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Squad reactions to being called straight:
Joyce: The fuck, no I'm not.
Enzo: Excuse the hell out of you?
Jonathan : Ding dong, you are wrong!
Murray: Who told you that? And why did they lie?
Nancy: Rude.
Robin: *punches the person*
(Robin would punch them tho, I feel like she definitely would)
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
So um
This was a lot.. Sorry.. Hope you liked it tho!
And um.. Ye.. Lots of Love ✨❤️🥺✨
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superluigiglitchy · 1 month
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incorrect quotes
Meggy: Please i'g begging you go see a DOCTOR- Paige, bleeding out of the floor: I'm sorry is this our stab wound? stay out of this. - Neo 3 aka Soup: God has let me live another day and I'm going to make it everyone's problem.
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Cap'n Cuttlefish: Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.." - Soup: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you? - Marie: We call that a traumatic experience. Marie, turning to Callie: Not a "bruh moment". Marie, turning to Soup: Not "sadge". Marie, turning to Paige: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO". - Soup: Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat Cap'n Cuttlefish: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents. Soup: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you. Meggy: Actually I did the math, Cap'n Cuttlefish would have $225, not $0.15. Cap'n Cuttlefish: Fam I’m right here…. 8: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :) Soup: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please? 8: Sorry I only have a dollar. Soup: :( Meggy: Hey I just realized my friend is right, Cap'n Cuttlefish would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent. 8: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice. Meggy: You can buy anything you want with $22,500. Harbor: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice. Meggy: Apply juice to what. Harbor: Directly to the forehead. Cap'n Cuttlefish: Great chat everyone. - Soup: I can’t believe my birth certificate says F… Soup: …How did I fail being born?
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Marie: To be honest, I'm kinda pissed that I'm not asleep in bed next to the love of my life in a cottage with no obligations other than watering my vegetable garden.
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Cap'n Cuttlefish: Meggy, Paige, I’ve left a letter telling your parents not to worry— Meggy: They won’t. Cap'n Cuttlefish: that you’re safe— Meggy: That’ll just depress them. Cap'n Cuttlefish: —and you’ll see them in a few weeks. Paige: Do we have to? Cap'n Cuttlefish: .... Cap'n Cuttlefish: *slowly takes out the adoption papers*
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Cap'n Cuttlefish: You three, explain right now! Harbor: It was Soup. Paige: It was Soup. 8: It was Soup. Soup: Soup: …fuck. - Callie: To everyone who has treated me poorly; I am sexier than you. - Paige: When I first met you, I thought you were weird and annoying. Soup: And? Paige: And you are. Soup: I love you too
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infuschia · 8 months
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idk
hi guys i am so sorry for totally ghosting :/ i know that's the worst feeling with a fic you love and i'm so so sorry. i'm gonna be so straight up, i have had a WILD life from even before i started this fic up until right now - and although things are finally starting to take shape and calm down to say the least, i lost a lot of myself during that time. i grew in many ways as well, but i think there's just been a lot that happened to me over the past year or so that held me back from goals i have or the type of person i wanna become or whatever, and without going into detail, i cannot lie alot of it has been really really hard. i definitely used writing as an escape/coping mechanism of some sort for the negative feelings i was experiencing - and that can be super helpful for real plus i've BEEN in therapy lol, but i also still found myself retreating away from parts of my life that would have been good for me and my growth to pursue, and i can't be doing that anymore. as much as i fell in love with writing all this for you guys, it ended up taking up a lot of space in my mind as more of a distraction from my own setbacks and issues instead of being something wholly good for me, if that makes sense. unfortunately - THE MOST PAINFUL MIC DROP iamsosososorry - that distraction has had to end. some lowkey rock bottom moments forced me to take a better look at my life for what it really is AND for what i want it to be, and at this time i do need to step back from the false life i created in this story and step back into my real one. not that i was like living in my bedroom on my laptop or nothin LMAO i'm just sayin there have been some things i know now i can't continue with in the same way that i did before, in terms of what i spend my time and energy on. i can't say for sure that i'll never be back but i don't wanna be making any promises i can't keep. I LOVE AND APPRECIATE ALL OF THE LOVE SO MUCH OVER THE YEAR I SPENT WORKING ON THIS FOR YOU ALL i NEVER EXPECTED like anyone to read it so just every split second you even spent CONSIDERING this fic was just music to my soul and i again can't begin to describe how wonderful it's been hearing from you all and knowing that at least in some small way i was able to add a bit of joy to your lives. it's not goodbye, it's see you down the road - LMAO IGNORE MY MELODRAMATIC ASS SO SILLY but fr. over the summer i fell in and out of love and back again (MAYBE I SHOULD NOT SAY LOVE LMAO maybe lust and some feels LOLOL BUT MAN IDEK AIFSHJABJHD) with an old potential guy of sorts (have talked on and off for the last three years bruh hometown crush), and after all this time of never actually being upfront about what we thought of each other we were FINALLY honest with each other about how we felt on things, just before having to go back to school in different parts of the country - with a hope to see each other again down the road #romantic? #idek. i hope it works out with him, maybe my romantic ass is just bein delusional asf but i also just have that feeling that we'll find each other again when the time is right. and maybe just maybe i'll be back at this when the time is right - but all i know for sure is that, just like with this man-whos-not-my-man-but-may-just-be-one-day, right now i gotta focus on loving myself above all. THIS IS CRAZY SO MUCH WRITING I KNOW but i know how it feels to have a fic you like just drop off the earth so i guess better something than nothing, better late than never. SO so so much love forever and always. you guys all have my heart no matter who you are, where you are, or whenever you're reading this. LOVE YOU TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH YOURE AMAZING AND KEEP ON BEING YOU CUZ THATS INCREDIBLE ON ITS OWN <3 <3 <3 see you down the road my friends xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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thunder-jolt · 9 months
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Pokémon x Digimon Incorrect Quotes!
Main Cast: For Pokémon: Morpeko, Houndoom, Crobat, and Cofragrigus. For Digimon: Beelzemon, Devimon, Myotismon, and Mummymon. - - - - -
Morpeko, referring to Cofragrigus and Crobat: Those guys are dorks. Houndoom: Yes, but they’re my dorks. - - - - - Morpeko: Are you laughing at that video of Houndoom and Crobat fighting? Cofragrigus: No. Cofragrigus: I'm laughing at the comments. - - - - - Morpeko: On the count of three, what’s your favorite cake? Morpeko & Cofragrigus: One, two, three- Morpeko & Cofragrigus: Chocolate cake, peanut butter frosting, and chocolate chunks! Crobat: Our turn, Houndoom! One, two, three- Crobat: Vanilla! Houndoom: I’ve never had cake before. What is cake? - - - - - Cofragrigus: Why are Crobat and Houndoom sitting with their backs to each other? Morpeko: They had a fight. Cofragrigus: Then why is Crobat holding Houndoom's paw while Houndoom holds his wing? Morpeko: They get sad when they fight. - - - - - (Not a totally accurate height difference but fuck it) Myotismon: What’s it like being tall? Mummymon: Is it nice? Devimon: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards? Beelzemon: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb four chairs, two boxes, a small coffee table, and six oddly placed stools to get what they want. - - - - - Mummymon: Your smile? It makes my day. Beelzemon: Your happiness? I live for that. Devimon: A room? Get one. Myotismon: Hotel? Trivago. - - - - - Myotismon: We call that a traumatic experience. Myotismon, turning to Beelzemon: Not a "bruh moment". Myotismon, turning to Devimon: Not "sadge". Myotismon, turning to Mummymon: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO". - - - - - Devimon: We need a way to lure in new customers? Mummymon: Maybe we could have some fun, interactive events! Myotismon: Beelzemon bath water. Beelzemon: ABSOLUTELY NOT! - - - - - Beelzemon: Please say words of encouragement to me so I don’t murder someone right now. Morpeko: There are no books in prison. Beelzemon: *sighs* Thank you. - - - - - Houndoom: Why are you drinking? Devimon: I drink when I'm depressed. Houndoom: But you're always drinking? Devimon: *smug grin* - - - - - Crobat: Oh shoot! Crobat: Excuse my vulgarity. Myotismon: I’ll let it slide. - - - - - Cofagrigus, to Mummymon: You're not Mario. Let's get something fucking straight, you're Luigi at best. - - - - - BONUSES: Anthereamon, at Qi-Wu’s funeral: I need a moment with them. Everyone else at the funeral: Of course. *leaves* Anthereamon, leaning over Qi-Wu’s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead. Qi-Wu, sitting up in the coffin: Yeah, no shit. = = = = = Anthereamon: As a responsible adult- Qi-Wu: *chuckles* Anthereamon: … As a responsible adult— = = = = = Qi-Wu: Tomorrow's garbage day. Anthereamon: I can't believe they made a whole day dedicated to you. = = = = = Qi-Wu, trying their first ever cup of coffee: I am ENERGY! Anthereamon, an avid coffee drinker, on their twelfth cup of the day: Someone slap me awake or I am literally going to fall into a coma in ten seconds. - - - - - And that's that!
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vannahmontannah · 2 months
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Rest of the story on Wattpad @ VannahMontannah For the past couple of days, I have been super busy! I'm talking everybody taxes done came and the firsts thing on they mind is a car. On of them days was my off day, but I didn't mind showing up. I made it home and played with my dog for a little bit and decided to check the mail.
"These past couple days...I need a vacation,"
Bzzz Bzzz
"Hello?"
"What you doing?" Naomi asked.
"Checking my mail. Wassup?"
"I just wanted to talk,"
"What's wrong?"
"Duke...when you were hanging out with Zuri, how did you feel?"
"Why?"
"I just wanna know if I'm not crazy. I've been seeing someone and...I'm afraid she may leave me for someone else...it's scary out here,"
"If they really fuck with you then they would make some happen. I had genuine feelings for that woman...but I knew better. I knew better..."
"I feel the same way, like, I like her attitude, her energy, she's smart and open minded. We've been talking for a while and I don't know if she's ever gonna ask me out,"
"Why don't you ask her out?"
"Because I'm a princess,"
"Of course..."
"It's been two months and I know she likes me too, but she hasn't said anything. What should I do?"
"You definitely shouldn't be quiet about it. Ask what ya doing. Ask questions about ya relationship and where do ya see it going. If you want something, go for it. I know the one who initiated it should make all the moves, but it never hurts to ask,"
"I'm scared of the answer imma get,"
"Gotta let that go. Can't waste your time and she ain't on that level with you,"
I was going through my mail and came across and letter...from Atlanta. Who wrote me a letter from Atlanta?
"You think I should just ask her what we doing?"
"Yeah...yeah. Naomi imma call you back, okay?"
"Okay. Imma text you,"
"Cool. Later,"
I know this ain't who I think it is. I just know this ain't who I think it is.
"I'm truly sorry for my actions and the pain they caused. The weight of regret has been heavy on my heart, knowing that I hurt someone I deeply care about. Please believe me when I say that I care about you immensely, and the thought of causing you distress is unbearable. I hope you can feel the sincerity in my words when I express how much I regret what transpired between us. My apologies come from the deepest part of my soul, desiring nothing more than to make amends. I understand that saying "I'm sorry" might not instantly heal the wounds, but I am committed to showing you through my actions that I am truly remorseful. The realization of your hurt has been a wake-up call for me to reflect and recognize the impact of my actions. I wish more than anything that I could turn back time and erase my mistakes, but in lieu of that, I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. Your well-being means the world to me, and I am dedicated to proving that to you. Please give me the chance to demonstrate not just through words but through consistent actions that I am genuinely sorry and that I truly care about you."
All these emotions are swirling inside me as I read the letter. I am uncertain about what to think or do in this moment. Is she really going to get married? Is she still together with Justin? There are too many questions racing through my mind right now. With her asking for forgiveness, mentioning her return to town, and having a new home, everything feels overwhelming. It's hard for me to process everything at once. Fuck...
"Fuck!" I yelled. This is ridiculous, bruh. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do? Shut her out? Forgive her? Talk to her? I'm stuck! I usually just let them spiral, but Zuri was a charm. She was like that special charm on your bracelet that you admire. The one that's your favorite.
BOOM!
Okay...why is it ALWAYS raining?? Not just raining—thundering.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Who is it?"
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Yo! Who is it?"
I went up to the door and the peephole was covered. Now who playing on my door?
"Aye man, whoever you are, stop playing on my door—"
"Duke!"
I stared at the door for a few seconds. This can't be. After all this time my heart was torn, she decides to come back and think shit good? She has some nerve being at my door step right now. I grabbed Milo and put him in my room.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Duke! Can you please open up?"
Fuck! Should I even open the door?!
She knocked on the door and said, "Duke, I need to talk to you. The wedding is off, okay? There's no more Justin. He's out of the picture. Can you please open the door?" She paused, feeling regret for her actions. "I know what I did was wrong, but I am deeply sorry for what I did. You were right...I should have said no. I don't know what I was thinking."
"How can I believe you?"
"Duke, there's no more nothing! I'm single! I'm all for you! But you knew I was with someone too,"
"Zuri, you hurt my heart. You accepted his proposal and that broke me! I was down for months!"
"I know and I'm sorry! Duke, I don't know how many times in gonna apologize. I've said all I could say. I came from ATL back home to do this and wrote you a letter. I was gonna leave the voicemail, but I froze. You're all I was thinking about! DUKE JUST OPEN THE DOOR!"
"STOP YELLING!"
"YOU'RE BEING STUBBORN!"
Everything went quiet for a while. No one said a word to each other.
"Fine...you don't wanna talk to me? Cool. But just remember...remember one thing...I tried. Okay? I tried..."
I unlocked the door and cracked it open.
(Play media)
"Come on..."
"Thanks..."
She walked inside and I closed and locked my door. She had on some jeans, boots, a coat, some gloves and a beanie. She was holding an umbrella in her hand as well. I took the umbrella from her and placed it against the wall.
"Took you long enough,"
"Why are you here? You're moving back?"
"Yeah. I never stopped looking for a place here,"
"How did Justin take the news?"
"That's not important,"
"You gotta tell me later since I let you inside,"
"Fine, but Duke I have been trying to get in contact with you, I was just..." she sighed. "It was so much going on,"
"I bet it was,"
"I missed you a lot,"
"...I realized how wrong it was for me to try to come between you and your long-term partner. Though my actions were inexcusable, I couldn't stand seeing the way he mistreated you, and I found myself drawn to your side. Before I knew it, my feelings for you had grown so strong that I couldn't turn back. Being with you now brings me immense joy and makes me feel truly happy. Your presence brightens my day like nothing else could,"
"It shattered me too. I knew I should have said no and I knew I hurt you, bad. But I'm here now. Can you please forgive me?"
The moment I leaned in to kiss her, I was engulfed by a sensation of warmth and passion that I'd never experienced before. It was a spontaneous act, fueled by the intense chemistry that had been building between us for what felt like an eternity. Our lips met, and instantly, there was a connection, electric and undeniable. It was as if the world around us had faded into the background, leaving just the two of us, lost in the depth of our kiss. The way she responded, with equal fervor, told me she felt the same overwhelming emotions. Her lips were soft, yet insistent, and the gentle caress of her hands on my back sent shivers down my spine. This wasn't just a kiss; it was an admission of mutual desire, a promise of more to come. As we finally broke apart, breathless and with hearts racing, we shared a look that spoke volumes. There was a certain magic in that moment, a profound connection that words could never fully capture. It was a kiss that altered the course of our relationship, marking the beginning of something truly passionate and deep.
Intimacy, love, and passion are the cornerstones of any deeply connected relationship, weaving a tapestry of bonds that are both delicate and resilient. Our connection transcended the mere physical realm, touching the essence of our beings, making us intimately connected at a soulful level. This profound intimacy was not just about being physically close but about understanding each other's deepest fears, hopes, and dreams. Love, in its most authentic form, enveloped us, creating a safe haven where our vulnerabilities could be exposed without fear of judgment. Passion was the fuel that kept our connection vibrant, a fervent desire not just for each other's bodies but for the minds and spirits that dwelled within. In our intimate space, love and passion danced in harmony, each moment shared was a testament to the depth of our connection. It was in the quiet moments, in the gentle caresses, and in the shared glances full of unspoken words where our intimacy flourished. Our passion for life, for each other, was the glue that bonded us firmly, creating a fortress of love against the world. Every laugh, every tear, and every whisper shared in our intimate spaces etched a story of love, passion, and profound intimacy. We were not just lovers but soulmates, perfectly aligned in our desires, dreams, and the undying love that enveloped us, making our bond beautifully unbreakable.
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life-is-tough620 · 10 months
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Used a random quote generator....
Y/n: I’m scared that when you become rich and famous you’ll be embarrassed by me. Aris: Oh Y/n, I’m already embarrassed by you.
Y/n: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into- Aris: You sleep with a teddybear. Y/n: He’s my sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!
Aris walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Y/n, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK. Y/n, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)
Y/n: I think we should have glow stick juice injected in our bones when we're born, so if we break our bones, we get a fun little surprise. Newt: What's the surprise? Aris: Blood poisoning.
The gang responding to being stabbed by a sword Gally : Rude. Y/n: That's fair. Aris: Not again. Newt: Are you gonna want this back or can I keep it?
Aris: Hey Thomas. Thomas: punches Aris in the stomach Aris: What the fuck? Thomas: You are one of my very best friends. And I cannot stand by and watch you throw away your life like this. You're too young….YOU'RE TOO BEAUTIFUL! Aris: What the fuck are you talking about? Thomas: I'm talking about the baby that's growing inside of your belly right now. Newt: See ya! leaves Aris: I'm not pregnant! Thomas: Well, not after that punch you're not. I've been taking muay thai classes. Aris: I was never pregnant, Thomas! Thomas: Are… you sure? Aris: Yes I'm fucking sure! Y/n: I'm sorry, but why the fuck is everybody yelling over here? Thomas: Oh, I found this positive pregnancy test and— Y/n: punches Aris in the stomach Aris: AW, MOTHERFU--
Chuck: We call that a traumatic experience. Chuck, turning to Thomas: Not a "bruh moment". Chuck, turning to Newt: Not "sadge". Chuck, turning to Y/n: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO".
Trying to cheer Newt after a break up Chuck: You broke up with Thomas for a reason. Newt: I know, I know. I’m just so tired of missing them. Tired of wondering why they haven’t called. Why haven’t they called? Y/n: Maybe because you told them not to. Newt: What are you, the Memory Person?
Chuck: What are you getting Y/n for the holidays? Newt: I don't know. It's kind of hard buying a gift for your partner when they already got everything they could've ever wanted when they married you. So I'm not sure yet. Thomas: I'm getting Y/n a divorce lawyer.
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Text
a compilation of Yakshini references (thank u oasisstrings)
this is a sister post to my noore-yakshini-kali post because i wanted to keep all the yakshini quotes in some place and i figured why not do that shit here and save myself the trouble LOL
My friends, I am proud to announce that I am now the valley's premier Raksi distiller. I am hard at work, brewing tirelessly, so that everybody can take their mind off this miserable and futile war. Sure, it's no Shangri-Lager, but it will still have your lover looking more Yakshini than Yak scrotum, and the army won't burn down your farm for drinking it. - Sarbajit
so she's really hot. go figure
The Faithful, As you know I only station my most elite, my most feared, and my most faithful here at Baghadur. The Golden Path may have gathered their troops and made some advances in De Pleur's territory but we can't let that stand in the way of the work we are doing. His men are weak and know nothing of the ways of Yakshini. You are fully anointed, you have pledged your souls as hers. Remember to look into the fires and sing to the dark mistress, you will be rewarded in this life or the next. - Noore
this one has to be my most emphasized one because noore is the only character in the game to talk about her? and nobody else about yakshini either... this also confirms yakshini's involvement as a member of the kyrati religion's pantheon, but not as a goddess. wild
Yakshini speaks and the wind blows through my head. Thoughts scattered like loose papers. They had an order and an end in mind I'm sitting here with the wind blowing through my head. With no way back to my thoughts. I hear myself laughing. I feel the claws in my arm. Yakshini whispers me into a sweet sweet sleep.
ooh... i'll have whatever he's having LMAO
We paint their feet and offer them to the beasts for cleansing. We, who have succumbed to desire, offer these gifts so that you would give us more of yourself Yakshini. Do not abandon us, dark mistress. -The Faithful
blood sacrifices right...?
We offer this tribute to you, Yakshini, dark mistress of the moon. May you long serve over this land. May you long linger over our skin. -The Faithful
again with the mistress huh...
Do not be fooled by the old dead gods. The dark mistress, Yakshini, will take you to heights of pleasure that your quivering lips will not be able to give words. Head West of here, toward the bell tower, you'll find her chamber. -The Faithful
huh... "old dead gods" and the constant referral to yakshini as a mistress rather than a goddess...
My mind is with Yakshini, but my body can hardly follow. She is exhausting me, like no other woman ever did. Is she even human? I feel compelled to satisfy her every need. Whatever she wants me to do, I have the urge to obey. I am her dog, her slave and I will always follow her command. Blessed be the witch of the dark moon shining over my sweaty skin. - The Faithful
jesus christ chill bruh (take note of the "is she even human?" line)
Yakshini, my dark mistress
title says it all ig
Yakshini appears in the shadows of fever dreams. She exists only in the moment, I have difficulty recalling our moments in the haze.When I wake it's like a great pain and I count the moments until I let her take me again, her soothing love coursing through my blood, warming my very heart. I am consumed. I am hers. Blessed be the witch of the dark moon shining over my lustful soul. -The Faithful
interesting idea... the goat definitely doesn't like the blood lmao
also... witch...?
In this place we keep the very best for the dark mistress herself. These offerings are not for your hand. Remember restraint, and look into the fires. Yakshini will answer you. Let the poppy's grace sooth your hunger until the mistress takes them for her own.
the last of the text.
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empty-pizza · 10 months
Text
thoughts on harrow the ninth chapter one
bruh the book is just saying the emperor gets killed in fourteen month? RELAX. i'll kill him then, yeah, but i was hoping it'd keep it on the down low for now.
wait damn this is in the past. in a confusing way, but since ortus is here this is PROBABLY right before gideon started, or concurrent with it. which means that the emperor dying roughly 13-14 months after gideon occurred. actually, not sure how much time it was between the start of gideon and actually getting to the place. could be as little as 12 months. of course, that doesn't tell us when this book takes place, just where it'll most likely end.
finishes the chapter
well, that was as confusing as the prologue
i went down a few confusing thought rabbit holes there, including me being unsure if it's even a flashback at all, if it's a dream or some other kind of internal exploration of the mind. however i eventually figured out the obvious, which is just that the insanity Harrow refers to is that she sees things that are not there; mainly, a Body. What is the Body?
okay hang on i'm going down another thought rabbit hole
the body says This Isn't How It Happens. and that means the obvious thing which is that Harrow never even considered asking Ortus to do the real cavalier job.
like, the surface level way to take this is that throughout Gideon, Harrow was seeing visions of a Body the whole time, and we just had no idea of the ways that was affecting things. but that might be too simple and saying This Isn't How It Happens just gives me big vibes of the timeline somehow being changed in some form or another. which is a trope i really enjoy, so indulge me for a moment.
Harrow had no reason to ask Ortus to do the job and always planned on asking Gideon. this isn't a thing that happened. is this somehow a changed timeline? does that tie into Harrow being half a Lyctor? throwing out a random possibility here, but what if she prevented Gideon from having died by taking Gideon out of the timeline? of course it could also just not be timeline shenanigans at all. this could be something happening entirely in Harrow's internal world.
i just completely lack the information to put things together meaningfully, but the point is, the Body could be Gideon, whether as an out-of-timeline existence, or as something within Harrow's mind.
i feel like there's a general idea i'm trying to get at here that's hard to put into words but can be expressed through multiple different tropes or concepts that can be mental or temporal or all sorts of different magical concepts. i can't put things into specific enough terms to make a concrete theory here, but I feel like there's just a vibe/type of twist that i am anticipating.
it could also not be gideon, but be something else, which is still referring to the fact that gideon seems to not exist in this flashback.
something is going on. hope to be able to see it more specifically soon.
but i could, of course, be barking up completely the wrong tree. this could be setting up a completely different kind of reveal. that's fine, i like being surprised.
now, as a big fan of n.k. jemisin's writing, i should also say i anticipate twists with why some of this is in second person. can definitely pull the big ol' someone is narrating this TO harrow. notably, from the future, not the present, since it's past tense. it could be gideon, inside harrow. it could also be something else, if the author wants us to expect gideon and then get trolled.
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mendesblurb · 2 years
Note
A blurb where Shawn and the reader are both sick at the same time. They are being really cute taking care of each other and cuddling on the couch surrounded by tissues.
Mr & Mrs Sniffles
Shawn Mendes x female reader
Word Count: ~450
Warning ⚠️: fluff, maybe grammar error and maybe some punctuation errors.
Note: I promise, I am working on a non-blurb right now, it’s coming hopefully soon :) btw this is random, and hopefully I did okay for you Anon!
The coughing was something constant at this point, and Shawn was tired of it. He sniffed again, wrinkled his nose, and sneezed into a tissue, “Ugh!” He groaned; he couldn't get his nose to stop dripping.
“Looks like you have it too,” You say, and Shawn rolls his eyes. You have had the flu for a few days now, and today is the worst so far.
He continued snuggling back into his favorite pillow behind him, one hand caressing through your hair and the other wadding up the tissue to toss into the waste bin. It teetered on the rim for a moment, then fell in.
“And… he scores again, Go! Mr. sniffles.” You pumped his fist with yours in victory and grinned.
“Thank you, Mrs. Sniffles.” He smiled, bringing your hand close to his lips and kisses the back of it.
For two people currently feeling ill, the house was surprisingly clean, and Shawn would have hated to start the idea of piling up a massive pile of tissues that neither of you didn’t have the energy to clean up.
It started with your mild coughing and the occasional sneeze. You’ll be fine; It’s just allergies, you say.
You were clearly not okay. It wasn’t just allergies, as it turns out.
Shawn did his best to take care of you. You wanted to distance yourself, not wanting to infect him. But through to his stubborn self, he insisted he bring you some soup, make you a warm cup of tea, give you your meds, tissues, cookies, his sweater, your favorite blanket, or get whatever you needed. Unfortunately, after a couple of days of running back and forth for you, he soon found himself bedridden next to you and had unfortunately caught whatever you had.
As you lay on the couch together, he frumps about his circumstances, “Hmph… I’m not supposed to get sick… I’m supposed to take care of you….” He rasps.
If there's one thing you hated, it's when you were sick. You hated the fever, never-ending sniffles, the vomiting, the headaches, and on top of it all, you felt horrible for infecting your boyfriend.
“Baby…” You whimper, lightly holding his hand, “it’ll be okay….”
“My nose is stuffy….” Shawn whines, “And my stomach is churning….”
“I know, baby….”
“My throat feels like fire…” he continues to say.
“I know… mine too, baby….,” You sighed, “I’m sorry, it’s all my fault.”
”Hey! Don’t say that! apology not accepted,” He mumbled, lips brushing against the crown of your head, arms slightly moving to get closer to you, and leaned down to whisper into his ear, “it was all worth it.”
This was definitely not how he planned spending his weekend, but there is no one else he rather get sick for.
————————————————————————-
Thank you for reading guys... feel free to like, reblog, follow my account, leave a comment and my chat is always open for random chats or requests... appreciate every single one of you... ❤️
Taglist (open) : @monikamendes @holland-styles @bvttercupbby @lonelyreputation @badreputationlove @shawn-is-my-giant-jellybean @benito-mi-vida @swiftmendeshoran @yournameoneverypage @shawn-is-bruh @mendesbhraanth @perfectlywrongsm @imaginashawnn @smendes-forever @nervousmendes @whenyoureadyholland @shawn-youth @myboyshawn @camilalewiss @camilalewisss @theregoesmyherojd @nanijaac1 @shawnieeboyy @silverswallow @inlovewithmendes-blog @mendeslola-blog @mendesx123 @23kofmendes @jellyloml @chipofmendes @poohmendes @wutheringmendes @shawnmendesbuddy​ @chocochipcookie305
Story code: 07052219
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solastia · 1 year
Text
Solastia’s Ateez Concert Take
So now that post concert depression has settled in nicely, I’ve decided to remanence on key points and thoughts while experiencing one of the best/sometimes worst nights of my life. 
 Holy shit they’re real
Holy shit they’re all beautiful
They all look exactly like their pictures except I really wanted to force feed them all some burgers because they are all so skinny.
My feet and back were in so much pain and I hadn’t eaten or drank anything since six am and I was so exhausted by the time I got stage side but the moment I saw them during sound check it was almost worth it all. Not sure if I’d ever bother with VIP or floor tickets ever again because that part of everything was a nightmare, but having them all smile and look me in the eyes was almost worth the absolute pain I’ve been dealing with all day.
Arizona belongs to Song Mingi. The arena went insane whenever he showed up and all of his merch went first. They were screaming for him so much that he started to get shy and the other members began to try an egg him into interacting more with us. I think the only other members that got almost as much love as him were Jongho and Hongjoong. But Arizona as a whole is Song Mingi’s bitch. 
Wooyoung is so fierce and focused when he’s preforming it’s almost intimidating.
Yunho is so handsome he looks like an actor. But he’s super cute and was smirking and laughing almost the entire time. I don’t know how you look mischievous for an entire concert but he pulled it off. 
 San gives me whiplash because he’s so cute and then body rolls right in my damn face so I don’t know what to think. He’s also a HUGE flirt like DUDE. I was almost convinced he was going to send me the infamous NDA lmao
Seonghwa is so ridiculously stunning in person like holy hell that man looks like an angel. He also sweats like insanely crazy and I had to fight intrusive thoughts about jumping up there to lick it up. Wrong place for that thought but bruh it happened
Hongjoong is amazing and so talented and so pretty and when he looked me into the eyes and smiled I died and he pointed at my Hongjoong shirt and sent me a finger kiss and I died again. I hate fan service but I ate it up.
 Yeosang is so cute and sweet and he kept crouching by our side a lot and dude he has such buff arms and soft smile that it’s hard to know what to think. But he was defiantly the type of guy that I tend to gravitate towards in real life if you know what I mean. I could definitely see him being happy in my playroom 👀
 And for the final member I need to mention Jongho. Oh Jongho. So I saved him for last because I have an announcement. Hongjoong is my bias wrecker now because he has been replaced by Jongho as bias. This boy. No, this man y’all. Like, every single one of them is stunning right? But Jongho looked me into the eyes and smirked once and sent my soul flying. Like, my dudes. He’s so handsome? And like super solid if that makes sense? Like, he looks like the type of person you marry and settle down with for life if you’re both into that. Dude would hold your heart in his hands and you’d feel so safe? I don’t even know how to explain why I felt so drawn to him but I so was. I wish I was able to take more pictures and videos but my phone was dying the whole time since I’d been there since early morning.
In conclusion, I am Atiny for life and officially belong to Choi Jongho
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having-conniptions · 9 months
Text
Love In The Air episode 7 live reaction under the cut (long post)
I have a feeling this is gonna be a goooood one
Phayu instantly getting worried and rushing home when Rain doesn't pick up the phone seems a little extreme... he's got the right instinct tho
Lol how quickly did it get dark outside
That photo of Rain is terrifying if I was Phayu I'd be murderous too
Rain is such a savage omg
Fuck that is so humiliating I'm about to burst with rage
This hurts to watch aaaaaaaaaaaa
Not the hand argh
Were those... shots?
"I think you should stop" THANK YOU
That zebra shirt tho lol
When Rain goes and kicks the guy 🔥🔥🔥🔥 But then he says "Bear this in mind. P'Phayu is the only one who can screw me." Baby you're a bit cringe but I still love you
The confession aaaaa 😭❤️❤️❤️
The jokes about Rain's name don't really make sense with the subtitles lol
Not Sky telling them Rain's in a relationship
OMG I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE EVERYONE'S FACES WHEN RAIN OR SKY REVEALS IT'S PHAYU
Hahahaha Phayu can not leave his Rain alone
OMG IS HE JUST GONNA WALK UP AND KISS RAIN AND EVERYONE'S GONNA BE SHOCKED AF
Hahahahaha Sky teasing Rain <3
The way they're all falling over each other when Phayu comes to their table lmao
"No, I'm here to pick up my partner" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
But also PSA please don't out your partner without making sure they're ready
"It's a secret" awwwww
THEIR FACES XD
"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god" HAHAHA WHICH ABSOLUTE ICON SAID THAT
They're all fangirling over PhayuRain aaaawwww
Well except for the ones that were crushing on Phayu lol
Brooo you really think Rain is still interested in Ple??? SIR have you looked in a mirror? Have you looked at Rain when he looks at you? Bruh
PRAPAI HELLOOOOO CUTIIIEEEEE
Idk why I love him so much I just do
Oooooooo Pai and Sky alternating scenes? PrapaiSky arc let's GOOOOOO
Wait are they getting ready for a date? WITH EACH OTHER? Ok nah Sky is just doing chores
Idk in my head they've had something going on since the first race (the hickey!!! Pai asking about Sky!!)
PRAPAI IN THAT RED SUIT OH LORD HAVE MERCY
Pai is at work smiling to himself CLEARLY BECAUSE OF SKY COME ON
AND HE CANCELED A MEETING I AM ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT
Prapai in a blue suit 👀👀👀👀 these timeskips are confusing the hell out of me tho
Ok so now Pai is asking about Sky again... AND ASKING FOR HIS NUMBER
THEY DEFINITELY HOOKED UP THAT NIGHT OH THEY ABSOLUTELY DID and then they never saw each other again omg it's been LITERAL MONTHS and Pai can't stop thinking about Sky I AM GOING INSANE
Lol Sky isn't picking up bc he thinks it's a scam caller
JUST TEXT HIM
Bonus scene: WAIT WHAT? Phayu tampered with Rain's car back then so he'd have to ask him for help? Yeah idk about that... And he was interested from the moment Rain held that umbrella for him? AWWWWW
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lennjamin-o7 · 1 year
Note
you'd be surprised at how many people reread your fic lmao, I also love rereading your fic (esp for the angst 👀). One of the funniest thing I realized at one of my rereads is that all of the blessed ones have the same 'short word + name of weapon' pattern techno does. I did an irl facepalm for not realizing it sooner lmao.
My favorite scenes is definitely techno's dream sequences, esp because it's genuinely does feel like a dream. Idk how to explain it, but it's scratching my brain in the best way. Plus the way you revealed the blood god!! Honestly I think that's one of the best application of "show don't tell" I've seen in a while. Cuz, you never said that it was the blood god, but Everything in that exact moment just Screams it. I just love the dream sequences alright. Also, the fact that the blood god actually hates how the church is treating techno is really funny to me, cuz now there's three parties who wants techno, and none of them will go down easily (unless techno's gonna off of blood god's hand with that little bet 👀).
Alright this is getting too long, I've already poured out so much in the comments and somehow I'm still having thoughts abt this fic 😵‍💫 what I want to say is, this is such a good fic I love it very much mwah /p
side note: I don't know why, but my brain has decided that your blood god looks like Mohg from elden ring (tw for body horror if you decide to look him up tho). I mean, his title is Lord of Blood so it kinda makes sense.
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I'm so happy that something I created gave you enough joy that you read it not once but TWICE. But you insinuating that you read it more than twice. Bruh. I'm just incredibly flattered 💚💚💚.
I am incredibly proud of the names for the Blessed so I am glad people enjoy that, too, and it's not just me giggling at it. I originally was making it that every Blessed had 2 Syllable Adjective + 1 Syllable Weapon, specifically. So it had the exact same stressed syllables as Technoblade's name when said outloud. Just so it was even more integrated into the fic. (Also, Subtleknife is a nudge at His Dark Materials series by Philip Pullman, which also has religious themes to it. Especially in relation to religious zealotry and overreach. So, I thought it would be a fun little fitting addition)
But as I added more names, it became harder to do that pattern because there are only so many 1 syllable weapons. And I really didn't want to keep reusing weapons, even if in Universe that's what they would have had to do. And I had the wiki for Melee weapons open on my computer for so long lol. So, I know I eventually caved on sticking strictly with that setup as more side ocs were named.
I am so glad you like the dream sequences! I have a BLAST writing those, and I have actually written two or three that never made it into the fic because I felt I needed to use them more sparingly. If I use them too often, I feel like it will ruin the tension of them, you know? So, as much fun as I had writing them, I do have to restrain myself lol. But trust me, I love them very much. And there will definitely be more in the fic because I am weak and want more. It definitely scratches my brain, too.
And I am glad I've been successful with the Show, Don't Tell. That is one of my personal goals when I started writing this fic in particular. To do better with show don't tell. And its really encouraging to hear that it was successful. Especially with the Blood God, because I was trying to hit that niche of, like, eldritch horror. Which HAS to be show not tell. Because I can't just say "hey, this guy is horrifying and incomprehensible!" and have the same impact. I had a lot of fun trying to find the right words to get across the feelings of those scenes. It was a lot of effort, but really really fun effort.
And Techno is in the middle of a multi-sided tug of war and doesn't even realize it lololol. Unfortunately, he's the rope. Which isn't, you know, great. I mean, for him anyways. All of us that like angst are having fun.
I love every word so if you are worried about it being long for me, please don't worry. I'm screenshotting it, printing it out, and eating it. I love it. Delicious food. Chef kiss. I love it. And I love the comments. And I am so happy it makes you happy enough to rotate it in your brain. Because it also rotates in my brain.
And I've never played Elden Ring, but I did look that up and fuck that is a cool design. The people who designed that game really went off. And feel free to imagine the Blood God like that, its looks neat as hell!
And its not like I've described what the Blood God looks like.
Because Techno hasn't looked at him yet.
Which I'm sure isn't significant. :)
Have a great day! And seriously. Thank you for the ask 💚💚💚
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tashabilities · 6 days
Text
I want some house slippers
This just socks around the house is OK
But them same socks in my bed,
Even though I don't wear shoes in the house and I sweep and mop my floors regularly,
Ain't gon cut it for me
I'm picking up icks that were never icky to me previously, like, am I developing an obsessive compulsion?
I have houseshoes that Suh and the girls got me, but I don't know that I like that flip flip slide style, which is why I don't wear them and they look new every time I take them out the closet.
It feels like a nightmare to have my foot hanging like that out the back of that shoe
Like, at least with thong flip flops, there's the thong between your toes to grip onto and keep the flappy back of the shoe in place,
But with a slide??!!
With a slide, your toes aren't holding on to anything, so you can slide right out the shoe
And other than thong flip flops,
I now know that it's my sensory based inability to wear open backed shoes that makes me hate a slide, like,
With every step, I feel like i'ma slide right out of them and be barefoot at any moment.
So I don't own a single pair of slides outside the houseshoes gifted to me because I hate that style of shoe!!!
Anyway, I want something that pulls on and stays on like a sock or regular shoe, so your brain unconsciously registers IT'S A SHOE,
Which makes it impossible for you to keep it on while in the bed, so your brain will tell you to take them houseshoes off before you get in bed wearing them.
Like one of those houseshoes made of mop fibers, so you can passively sweep your floor just by walking around,
But your brain alerts you to take that shit off before you get in bed.
That's what I need
I'm starting to feel buzzed, FINALLY, like,
I definitely can't drive a car now
But I took that teaspoon of oil at 8 pm Saturday night!
It's SEVENTEEN hours later and I'm just now getting buzzed.
Men are embarrassing, bruh.
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