#Honestly writing this post made me realize that princes are actually more boring than princesses

[lieutenant-amuel]

you wrote once about your favorite Disney princesses. What are your thoughts on the Disney non princess? Or top 10 princes?

Thank you for the ask!

The term “Disney non-princesses” is too vast, so I’ll go with the princes :P

I’ll take the characters from the same movies the princesses are from (even if they’re not “princes” aka royal), excluding:

EoA, because I’m not even sure which characters to include. Probably Gabe and Mateo because they’re the main characters and around Elena’s age. But I won’t include them because they are not well-known outside their show and either way we all know Gabe is always my number one, so let’s make this top more interesting.

Moana and Raya and The Last Dragon, because those movies simply don’t have male characters who could be considered “princes” (I don’t have the heart to call Maui or the guys (Boun and Tong) from Raya’s gang princes, sorry and I barely remember those characters because I’m not a big fan of the movies).

Before we begin, I want to note that this top is about MY favourite princes, not the best ones, and is supposed to reflect MY opinion, not yours. If you disagree, make your own post and don’t argue with me, trying to change my mind, because this kind of conversations is simply pointless. Anyway, I’ll try to express my opinion as politely as possible so I won’t offend anyone.

And now let’s get started!

11. The Prince (Prince Florian/Ferdinand)

I have nothing to say about him, besides he’s romantic and sweet. His role in the movie is insignificant, he appears only in two scenes and doesn’t even have speaking parts, I think?

I believe he could have a bigger impact on me if I loved the movie more, because my own bias plays a big role in making this top, but sadly he’s just bland for me.

10. Kristoff

Please, don’t bite me.

Despite the fact Kristoff is basically a lot more round than most of the characters I put higher, I still don’t have much to say about him, because he’s simply not my type.

I absolutely love Anna, but it doesn’t make me care about Kristoff as much as about her. He’s kind, loyal, brave, and even has a backstory, but… there’s still something missing. I don’t have the heart to call him unintelligent or God forbid dumb, but he just seems superficial to me. This is kind of people I don’t really like in real life, so I suppose it makes its impact.

I’m really sorry to all Kristoff fans, because really, he’s a great character, but just not for me. I often prioritize character’s personality over their complexity (which is why I’m not a fan of Elsa or Esteban if we take EoA into account because it’s been my brand~ for a long time) and if I don’t like them as a person, I cannot care about them as a character, and Kristoff is this case.

9. The Beast (Prince Adam)

As much as I love Belle, I’m indifferent to the Beast. I know he kind of has a complex character arc as we see how he’s actually changing thanks to Belle’s influence, plus we know a little of him before he was turned into a beast, like the fact he loves books, which actually does add something to his character, but I just don’t think that much about him. He’s nice, and that’s all I can say.

8. Prince Charming (Prince Henry)

I’m not sure what to say about him. He and Snow White’s prince are basically the same as neither of them plays an important role in the movies. I put him higher than the Beast mostly because of the sequels where he gets more personality (and an iconic jumping out of the window scene) that makes him a lot more enjoyable and fun to watch, even though he’s not really the character type I like.

7. Eric

Same as for the Beast. I strongly disagree with people who call Eric dumb or bland, but the fact I don’t insult him doesn’t mean he’s a character I often think about. I’m indifferent.

I love his passion for the sea, it makes him curious and adventurous, and I think it’s actually super interesting that despite being a prince, he has a down-to-earth hobby and is nice to his crew (and he has a super cool dog).

I heard Eric got “more personality” in the remake but I haven’t watched it yet so I cannot put my two cents in. Anyway, this top is about animated princes, so I wouldn’t put him higher either way. But the movie would certainly help me to look deeper into his character.

6. Phillip

Unexpected? Well, as I said, I’m biased. Sleeping Beauty is my favourite old Disney movie, Aurora was my favourite Disney princess as a kid and so it automatically made me love her man, too. He’s charming and brave as he’s actually rescuing Aurora, and as much as this is basically the only thing I can say about him, I still put him that high because he has a special place in my heart.

But you know, if we’re unnecessarily overanalyzing, Phillip is also kind of a rebel since when he fell in love with Aurora without knowing it was her, he refused to follow the betrothal and wanted to marry the girl he actually loved, so yeah, that’s nice. And he has a cool horse and a fun dynamic with his father.

5. Naveen

And we’re finally getting to the characters that I actually care about and even can say something beyond “he’s nice.”

I love Naveen! He’s energetic and optimistic, and I honestly do love characters like him. He’s super fun and has a fantastic arc, and I love his passion for music. As in Eric’s case, that’s great that he has a hobby and treats common people nicely despite being a prince.

Really, I just love characters with a radiant personality.

4. John Smith

I thought for a long time whether I should put John Smith or Naveen higher, because I like them pretty equally, but eventually John Smith won mostly because he’s deeper and I have more to say about him.

John Smith is great! He’s curious and adventurous, which I already said about Eric, but he’s a lot more dynamic and charming, and it makes him more enjoyable to me (his part in Mine, Mine, Mine is fantastic). He’s also decent, brave, loyal, caring, and what’s also important open-minded. I love characters who use to have wrong beliefs but learn eventually that they’re wrong. I think if I had rewatched Pocahontas before making this post, I’d say a lot more about him.

3. Eugene

My Top-3!

Eugene must be one of the most loved Disney male characters, and that’s well deserved! He’s charming and witty, brave and resourceful, has a great backstory that actually makes people care about him and it leads him to have a fantastic arc.

I really don’t know what else to say about him, he’s simply an amazing round character with a unique personality, and I really love him a lot.

I’m not taking Tangled the Series Eugene into account, because I sincerely don’t like how he’s portrayed there. They make a very big emphasis on his narcissism, especially in season 1, making him a comedy relief character, whereas in the movie it isn’t even such a big deal. Not to mention his absolutely terrible arc of being the prince of the Dark Kingdom. It completely erases his backstory in the movie and makes his story of being an orphan a lot less impactful for me.

2. Shang

Another bias, because, as you might have noticed, Mulan is my most favourite Disney movie. Just of all time.

To be serious, Shang is a perfect character for me. He’s brave, smart, takes his responsibilities seriously. He might be blunt and tough on the surface, but he’s also decent, respects his soldiers, wants his father to be proud of him, and always strives to do the right thing even if it’s contrary to his duties (I do have a type, don’t I)

and oh my goodness his song is the fire

He’s perfect, and I love him <3

1. Aladdin

That’s my boy!

Aladdin is my second favourite Disney movie, and Aladdin himself is definitely one of the reasons why.

He’s incredibly brave, decent, kind and selfless without being too soft as he’s also witty and resourceful. He also has many insecurities that force him to make wrong decisions, but he’s learnt from each one, and the general concept of his character being “the diamond in the rough” is really the main reason why I love him.

Aladdin is so layered and dynamic, and he will always be special to me.

Bonus: Gabe

ALRIGHT I’VE CHANGED MY MIND I will include Gabe, because it gives me an opportunity to finally ramble about my best man again and I cannot waste it.

I don’t even know where to start with.

I love his personality. He’s brave, honest, responsible, kind, selfless, protective, loving, extremely loyal and hard-working.

I love his story and how much he’s grown on me.

I love so many character tropes he embodies, and how some of the important aspects of his character resonate with me, which makes him special to me on a personal level.

He’s the character who unleashed my creativity as I created so much content of him and even built my own little universe that revolves around him and that I love to death.

He’s the only character on this list that I think about literally every day, and he will always be special to me because of the impact he’s made on me.

I love Gabe, and he’s placed out of this top, because he’s incomparable <3

***

Thank you again for the ask! I hope I wasn’t too mean akjsnfkk.

#Ask me anything #Personal #Okay if I did include Mateo I think I’d put him higher than Eric but lower than Phillip #I… I’m just indifferent to him I’m extremely sorry #I liked him more in the past but throughout the time my opinion has changed #sadly #Honestly writing this post made me realize that princes are actually more boring than princesses #(to me at least) #There’s only five characters that I actually care about #(I don’t count Gabe because he’s not a Disney prince and I included him out of self-indulgence) #whereas in case of the princesses the whole top-10 are my big favourites #Эх

[janetbrown711]

Princess Angelina II was never fond of being told what to do.

Ever since she was a little girl, she loved being defiant. However, her parents were strict and had their ways of forcing her to do things anyway, so she adapted. If her parents wanted her to study? Fine, then she would read every book in the library and become far more intelligent than most of her teachers and would “smart ass” them constantly. Of course, her parents disapproved, but Angelina knew they technically couldn’t punish her this way, as she was doing what they asked after all. Still, she was aware that she was treading on thin ice, but she continued anyway, as it felt like the only thing keeping her sane. 

It was this mentality she carried with her during her least favorite activity of all: 

Meeting Suitors. 

The moment Angelina turned 16, her mother began arranging meeting after meeting with different princes and noblemen, all of which she hated. They were always so prideful and stuffy, they never had a sense of joy or humor in them. So, as was natural for her, she never refused to see them, but while they talked she’d always attack their pride and make sure they never wanted to see her again. She had hoped her actions would’ve given her a reputation as an “ineligible princess” but alas, rumors of her beauty and singing kept them coming. 

And so today Angelina found herself preparing yet again to meet with another boring suitor, this time a prince who was soon coming of age and was to rule the neighboring kingdom fo Ticktockia. Angelina spent several weeks reading up on the history of the country, as well as learning their customs, and knew she was ready by the time he arrived. 

“I don’t want you to play any funny games this time, Angelina. Ticktockia is a very important ally, and I don’t want you embarrassing my good name,” her mother, Queen Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca I, was quick to remind her right before the doors of the throne room were to open. Angelina wanted to roll her eyes, but didn’t have the energy or the time, as the doors were opened, and the prince entered. 

The prince of Ticktockia was a human, which she had expected. He was a particularly... interesting piece of work. He was growing a mustache, but he was very bad at it, and so it looked wispy and gross. his fashion sense was something else entirely, and he wore a giant clock on his chest, which Angelina recalled as the symbol of Ticktockia (as it was the meaning behind their name). 

“Hello,” He greeted her, but didn’t bow. Angelina rolled her eyes internally and curtsied. 

“Pleasure to meet you, sir,” She said. He only nodded in response. 

This was gonna be fun.

“Well, off you two go then,” Angelina the First waved the pair off, and Salazar held his arm out and Angelina took it, and they went off into the halls of the castle. 

“So... Prince... Salad bar is it?” Angelina asked. 

“Salazar,” He corrected, snappy. Angelina smirked. 

“Right, right, right, my apologies,” She said. “So... where are you from again?”

“Ticktockia, one of Warnerstock’s most important allies..? Surely you’ve heard of us,” He said, annoyed. 

“Not really, no,” She shrugged, removing her arm from his. 

“Oh please, we’ve made all of your clocks,” He pointed out. 

“Oh, those old things? They break every other week, we honestly should replace them all,” She lamented, internally pleased when she saw his anger rise and saw him desperately try to hide it. 

“Well then,” he huffed. “Perhaps I shouldn’t blame you, you are just a woman after all. I shouldn’t expect you to know the history of such an important country.” 

Oh he did not. 

“I can assure you Salazar, I know more of Ticktockia’s history than you do,” she warned. He smirked. 

“Sure you do,” He said. 

“Who was the 17th king?” She quizzed. Salazar paused to think. 

“King... Edmund?” He asked. Angelina shook her head. 

“King Raymond the Beloved. He helped create an era of peace in the land and helped create new trade routes for kingdoms all across the lands,” Angelina said. 

“Everyone knows King Raymond. I was simply... pretending not to know,” He so obviously lied. 

“Alright... who was the 20th king?” She asked. Salazar thought once more, stroking his gross wispy mustache. 

“Easy, King Walter,” He lifted his chin in the air. 

“Wrong. It’s your father, King Jonathan,” She said with a condescending smile. Salazar glared at her. 

“Well I never,” He huffed and crossed his arms. 

“Never what? Studied anything in your life? Because that’s something I’d believe. I mean, come on, who doesn’t know their own father?” She snorted. Salazar looked at her with disgust. 

“You are very unladylike,” He said. 

“It’s an art,” She replied.  

“Mhm,” He mumbled, continuing their walk through the castle once more. 

“So.. tell me... what about your kingdom do you know?” She asked. 

“We’re the number one supplier of clocks in the world,” He stated. 

“Right, but other kingdoms are coming up close behind, so I’d keep a close eye on that if I were you,” Angelina pointed out. 

“Ridiculous,” He scoffed. 

“Oh, but it really isn’t. Your methods are old and outdated and so people from the outside have worked on improving your old designs and they’re only becoming better and better,” Angelina said nonchalantly. Salazar’s eye twitched. 

“You know, this really isn’t the way you should talk to your betrothed,” He snarled. 

“Betrothed? What on earth makes you think we’re betrothed?” Angelina jumped in surprise. 

“I was invited here, no?” He eyed her up and down. “I was promised a bride, and seeing as you’re the prettiest one around and I was invited, we’re betrothed,” he said, placing a hand on her waist, to which she then jumped back and away. 

“Hate to break it to you, dimwit, but that’s not how this works.” She outright glared at him. 

“Oh please, there’s no sense in fighting it,” He rolled his eyes. “I want you, and so you’re going to be mine. Nobody says no to me.”

“Oh I’m sure they do, you probably just ignore it or are too much of a moron to see it,” She spat. 

“I am not a moron.” He raised his voice, but Angelina wasn’t frightened. 

“Sure. And my name isn’t actually Angelina,” She rolled her eyes. “Get real, you know almost nothing about your own kingdom’s history, and I’m sure if I wanted to bore myself further I’d discover you know nothing of Warnerstock, and it’s very apparent you haven’t a single clue of manners or decency in front of a princess.” 

“I. Am. Not. A. Moron,” He clenched his fist. 

“Oh please! If I were to look up the word ‘moron’ in the dictionary, it would have a picture of you. I mean- assuming you’re betrothed to me just because my mother invited you here? My mother may hate my guts, but she’d never do that,” Angelina smirked.

“I can have anything I want, just watch me,” He growled, stepping towards her, and Angelina realized just how much taller he was than her. 

“You’re nothing more than an arrogant, stupid, brainless, spoiled baby that hasn’t heard ‘no’ nearly enough in his life,” She defied him, and he raised his hand and struck her across the face so hard, she fell to the floor with a loud thud. 

Angelina laid on the ground a moment, realizing what just happened, feeling the sting and burn in her cheek. Slowly, she sat herself up. 

“You hit me,” She looked up at him. He dusted off his hand. 

“You’re truly a disgusting creature, Angelina.” he scowled. “I showed you nothing but decency, and you lash out like the vicious animal you are.”

Not even wanting to dignify his bullshit, she instead called for the royal guards. Salazar’s eyes widened as four guards came into the room from their posts, and upon seeing their princess on the floor with a newfound bruise and the neighbor prince red in the face with anger, they were quick to separate the two. 

“I won’t forget about this Angelina. I’ll be back, and I’ll make sure to give you hell once I’m in charge,” He declared for all to hear as he was escorted out. Angelina shuddered as she was helped up by one of the guards. 

“You alright, Princess?” He asked. 

“I’m fine,” She said, not wanting to get into it. 

Despite the stinging in her cheek, she had done what she had to. 

“Just take me to my mother, I’m sure she’ll be delighted to hear about this,” Angelina sighed. The guards nodded and she was escorted to her mother’s private study. She knocked on it once before entering. 

“Angelina, why am I not surprised?” Her mother didn’t look up from her paperwork, shaking her head. “What happened?”

“He had to leave early,” Angelina said. 

“He just barely arrived,” The queen remarked, before looking up at her daughter’s face and frowning. 

“Angelina, what did I tell you? I told you you had to be on your best behavior and you deliberately disobeyed me,” She set down her work. 

“Well gee, I’m sorry alright?” She rolled her eyes. 

“You and I both know that isn’t true. Honestly Angelina, why do you feel the need to sully the kingdom’s good name like this?” Angelina the First rubbed her forehead and stood. 

“Because it’s dumb. All of this is. The suitors, the manners, It’s just so dumb,” She complained. 

“Angelina, I’m not having this conversation again,” The queen stated. “These rules and rituals are tradition. You don’t have a choice. One day you will marry a suitor I picked out for you, whether it makes you happy or not.”

“I’d sooner die,” Angelina glared. 

“If you had any sense in you, you’d learn to bite your tongue, Angelina. Or do you want to be hit a second time today?” The queen raised her hand with her wedding ring on it and Angelina flinched. The queen smirked a little. 

“That’s what I thought,” She said, before sighing and returning to her paperwork. 

“We’ll have to reschedule the other suitors I had planned to visit this month until that bruise heals. We can’t have rumors spread,” She said, writing something down. If she had been feeling better, Angelina would’ve smiled. Her mother went silent a long moment, the only noise being the scratch of her quill touching the paper. Eventually her mother looked up at her, with an expression that looked like a mix of disgust, tiredness, and annoyance. 

“You can go now,” She said. Angelina curtsied for her mother, and then left.

For a while, Angelina found herself wandering the halls of the castle as she rubbed her bruise lightly. She knew she had done what she had to, but she still felt dazed. Perhaps it was from hitting her head, but she felt... odd. Light headed was the best term she could think to describe it. 

It wasn’t too long before Angelina noticed that she had wandered into the garden. That was good. The flowers and fountains did a lot to clear her mind on days like these. Eventually, she made her way to the middle, and sat down on the bench and watched fountain and birds that stopped to bathe in it. She couldn’t be sure of what she was feeling, but whatever it was, it was a lot.  

After awhile of just sitting there, a familiar voice called out, and Angelina looked up and felt herself revive a little. 

“Angelina! There you are,” William smiled and ran to sit down next to her. 

“Hi,” She smiled and scooted over so there was room. 

“How was your- oh my... what happened?” William gasped, referring to the bruise. 

“O-oh it was nothing, really,” Angelina brushed it off. 

“You’re hurt Lena,” He frowned with concern. Angelina took in a deep breath and sighed. 

“A suitor visited today- Prince Salazar of Ticktockia. I pushed things a little too far this time and well... he got pretty mad. And now my mother is pissed that I managed to make one of our strongest allies hate my guts,” Angelina chuckled sadly. 

“Lena... I’m so sorry. That’s terrible,” William said, his eyes watering. Angelina didn’t know how to respond. 

“William- I’m okay. Really. I’m used to it,” She tried to laugh it off. 

“You’re used to it?” His concern only grew and Angelina bit her words. 

“I-i mean...” She sighed. “You know my mother by now. I’m used to this.”

“Lena, I’m so sorry. Nobody should ever, ever hit you, especially your own mother,” William said. 

“Thank you William,” She smiled tiredly at him. 

“Lena, I swear to you, so long as I live, I’ll never let anyone hurt you like this ever again,” He held her hand and kneeled on the ground. 

“W-william, I-i don’t know what to say,” She sniffled, and realized her own eyes were starting to fill with tears. Quickly, she wiped them away. William then stood and pulled her into a tight and loving embrace. At first, Angelina was hesitant, but she chose to embrace it, and she hugged him back, and found herself quickly sobbing into his shoulder. 

“It’s okay Lena, I’m here. It’s okay. I won’t let anyone hurt you anymore,” he promised, and Angelina believed him. She felt safe in his arms, and never ever wanted to let go. She wanted to stay with him forever, safe and happy and secure. She knew he’d never hurt her, ever. 

She loved him. 

Princess Angelina the Second was in love with William. 

She smiled a little and embraced him even more. 

No matter what her mother tried to do or who she tried to set her up with, Angelina knew she was in love with William, and nothing was ever going to change that. 

#animaniacs #wakko's wish #king william warner #queen angelina warner #yakko wakko and dot parents #my fics #animaniacs fics #janetbrown711 #king salazar #pre canon #fjakdsl;afjsl #I want what william and angelina have #tw child abuse #tw abuse #tw hitting

[anomaly00-archive]

700 Follower Celebration: A Writing Journey (1/?)

Hey guys! So, to celebrate this milestone I’ll be doing a series of posts talking about how my wip has changed, their inspirations, my growth as a writer. though it’s only been maybe 2? years since I started writeblr, I’m pretty sure I, and my works, have undergone *many* a transformations. And speaking of transformations, this post is dedicated to the journey of my most fickle and ever-changing wip: When Comes the Dawn

The first WIP I ever introduced to tumblr – and my first multi-chapter project ever is When Comes the Dawn, a fantasy/court-intrigue tale featuring court politics, magic, death-defying princesses, and cloak-and-dagger schemes. It is the story I hold near and dear to my heart, even if I do have an on-again-off-again relationship with it. But the story you know now is vastly different to what it used to be. Really, the only thing remotely similar to WCTD and its predecessors are Charles and Fenice (and that’s just their names!)

WCTD started out as a very ambitious high fantasy AU fanfiction with a highly convoluted story line that existed, predominantly, in a 1,500 word prologue and hours upon hours of daydreaming. It did not help that, paranoid little gremlin that I was against people who might look over at my word doc by chance, I coded all of the names of these fanfic characters, keeping only the first letter the same. This eventually led to a detachment between the OG source material and my own work and I just ended up scrapping the entire thing and keeping my cast of (now original) characters. Thus began the era of Chronus. Or, proto-WCTD as I sometimes refer to it.

Chronus had very little connection to present day WCTD except for the name Charles, Fenice, and the three gods that created and watched over the universe. In WCTD, the Trinity were more akin to the gods we have today; igures of worship, omnipresent, with not a lot of proof for their existence except faith-- and I’m saying this as a Catholic. In Chronus, they were actual characters. The gods of Creation/Life, Destiny, and Time/Death (the latter being named Chronus so y’all know where I got the name) watch over the world and intervene when they need to. The lore of the story: through some convoluted circumstance, Chronus ends up dying which is a pretty big bummer since, y’know, his death left the entire universe in stagnation and nothing could die. Uh, the logic gets iffy around here but just understand that Creation and Destiny managed to save the universe but are forced to enlist select humans into being temporary gods of death in exchange for granting their desire. Fenice was one of these humans, Charles was a part of her “wish,” and...more convoluted plot stuff that I honestly can’t remember.

I hated how I spent more time trying to logic the entire plot and ended up scrapping the entire thing. After taking a few months break from this story, I started again by recycling characters and concepts I like. And once again we are left with Fenice, Charles, and the Trinity.

I recycled the backstory I used for Fenice and Charles which had them as royals; a prince and princess caught in the midst of a succession game a la War of Roses. Here, Fenice Alexandra and Charles Alexander were twins tied at the hip, on the run from their power-hungry uncles and planning a way to reclaim their birthright.  I made it through a few chapters, a bit of outlining, and weeks of thinking before I found myself dissatisfied with this story and scrapping it once again. Around this time, I realized I wanted to add magic but not have magic and magical fights be a huge part of the story, so I feel like adding an adventure element would be counterproductive. I also got the idea of a world where everyone had magic, but one of the main characters did not.

I played around with Fenice and Charles’ relationship for a while. One had Fenice being the significantly younger sibling with magic and Charles the older and without (the opposite of where we are today). In every iteration of the story I always had Fenice as the main POV character, so with this set-up, to create conflict, I had the idea of Fenice not wanting the throne (despite being the chosen heir and more than qualified for the position) scheming to get Charles the crown instead (what Charles wants be damned).  Others had this same setting but with Charles still being chosen as heir despite not having magic (which was apparently the number one unspoken rule of succession) which created resentment in Fenice...and made proto-Dantalion (called William at the time) look like a fool. But both these scenarios were just...not something I was particularly interested in. Fenice was insanely OP, everyone looked stupid to me, and honestly? It just seemed boring.

I knew I was close to a break through, so I decided to switch it. Fenice, the elder sibling without magic, who, by a tragic twist of fate, had everything that should be hers instead given to her younger brother. Then, I separated them; the elder lived away from court, the younger lived close to it to wipe away as much chances of them getting along. Then, I worked on their parents. Here, Dantalion, Illysandre, and Titania came into existence. Then, more characters, more plot lines; I connected relations, brewed up even more backstory and lore to make sense of this plot line, steeled myself from making a spin-off prequel, etc. etc. Finally, WCTD reached where it is today. I have no doubt that it’ll still go through massive changes in the future, but for what it is now? It’s the closest I’ve ever been to the story I want to tell.

#writeblr #writers on tumblr #c.follower milestone #c.my writing journey #opera. when comes the dawn #mea. wip

[toomuchtimenerd]

Reviews for 3 New Adult Novels

So I got a little bored and decided to take a short break from YA fantasy. I spent a good amount of time browsing the Kindle Unlimited catalog (I very recently found out that even if you don’t pay for Kindle Unlimited these books are still much cheaper than others. It’s like $3-4 for a book compared to the usual 9.99. Incredible). During my search, I came across the New Adult genre (seriously - why is Kindle Unlimited FILLED with NA books?) and because I’ve been needing to obsess over some steamy romance lately I picked up two of the most angsty NA books I could find plus one that simply had stellar reviews on Goodreads. And then I proceeded to finish all three books within about a week. To top it off, two of these books are like 700-page novels. It’s amazing how much one can accomplish when you have literally nothing better to do with your life, isn’t it? Yes, I am poking fun at myself. But it’s all temporary. I’m going to actually try my best to keep these three reviews as spoiler-free as possible, for once.

I’m going to start with Devious Lies by Parker Huntington, as that is the first NA book I finished reading this week. So this 700 page behemoth of a book features your standard enemies-to-lovers with a little bit of suspense/mystery added in for flavor. Oh, and sprinkled with some SERIOUS angst and brooding on top. It also features an age-gap romance, and is slow-burn. Devious Lies is basically about rich girl Emery Winthrop who, at 18 years old, is forced to forgo her rich girl life when her father goes under investigation for embezzlement and subsequently goes in hiding. When the embezzlement is leaked, this basically screws over everyone who’s employed by Emery’s father and everyone who invested stocks in his company. This includes a HUGE amount of people in the southern town Emery grew up in. This also includes the Prescott brothers, Reed and Nash. Reed is the boy that Emery had the biggest crush on her entire life, but Nash is ultimately the main love interest and POV that we see aside from Emery’s. 

After the whole embezzlement thing which is a huge factor leading to Nash’s father’s death, Nash is pretty much hellbent on seeking revenge on the Winthrops. By the time the story really gets going, Nash is in his 30s and has essentially built a multi-billion dollar enterprise and of course is one hell of an angsty playboy. Emery is around 22 years old, fresh out of college (paid for by herself) and gets hooked up with a job working for Nash. Nash finds out, and makes it his life goal to make Emery’s life as difficult as possible while trying to find out where her dad is hiding. The entire story is about the progression of their relationship and the secrets surrounding the embezzlement. 

So this is probably one of the better angsty love stories I’ve ever read. And that’s saying a lot because I’ve never liked angst all that much (tried it with The Cruel Prince and although I really didn’t like it I actually have been considering giving that trilogy another chance). Angst is usually so... unbelievably NOT well written at all b/c I feel like angsty characters are just angsty without a good enough backstory to defend it. This tends to be more so prominent in contemporary romance novels, or maybe that’s just because I’m a lot pickier when it comes to contemporary romance. But for Devious Lies, I think Huntington does a pretty good job at charging the main characters with believable and understandable angst. Nash grew up almost in poverty and his dad literally worked himself to death while watching trust-fund baby Emery grow up like a southern princess. The embezzlement destroyed Nash’s dad, so I can see why he blames the entirety of the Winthrop family for the hardships he faced growing up. Not to mention, Nash’s life story is the embodiment of a rags-to-riches story so of course he’s going to look down on Emery who supposedly gets millions of dollars per month just from her trust fund. 

Devious Lies is told from two alternating POVS, Emery & Nash, and I think the scene I anticipated the most was when Nash found out that Emery isn’t getting a single penny out of her trust fund and that Emery is actually living in poverty and working to survive, not out of boredom. We know that Emery’s life is incredibly tough from the very beginning, considering her family name is tainted and she owes student loans on top of helping fund someone else’s college tuition. Nash doesn’t find out about this until maybe past the halfway point of the book, and for me that was probably my favorite part of the entire book - the realization of how much of a complete ass he’s been to her and how she really is the last person who deserved to be targeted by his thirst for vengeance. This is also when their relationship hits a major turning point and finally dips out of the ‘enemies’ part of enemies-to-lovers. 

I think my biggest issue with Devious Lies is how unnecessarily long it is. I think it could absolutely be cut down to around 400 pages, since there were a lot of chapters (especially in the very beginning) that could’ve been very easily abridged or completely left out. The first several chapters covers major events from before Emery goes to college and Nash strikes rich, and from what I can tell these chapters are there to lay out character foundations. But Huntington really could have made these SO MUCH shorter and gotten to the actual story way quicker without sacrificing any character building. Just my two cents, although it seems like most reviewers on Goodreads agree with me over this regard. So despite some unnecessary chapters or parts that could have been left out, I think I’d still give this book a solid 4/5 simply because the author managed to write contemporary romantic angst without making me want to die of second-hand embarrassment. Not to mention, the big plot twists near the end of the story were quite well written and totally worth sticking around for in my opinion. 

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Second book is The Wall of Winnipeg and Me by Mariana Zapata. Apparently Zapata is like a god at writing sports romance, and this book was rated #1 on some kind of Goodreads list plus it was like 4 bucks or something so of course I had to check it out. This large book is around 600+ pages, but out of the three books that I’m reviewing in this post today this is DEFINITELY my favorite one of the three. I haven’t read a sports romance since I was 15 and obsessed with the Escape to New Zealand series, so I honestly didn’t know what to expect from this outside of mega muscle dudes and steamy sex scenes with said mega muscle dudes. But this book managed to exceed whatever I was expecting AND to my surprise only had one actual full-blown sex scene. Which was very tactfully placed and made for a beautiful end to a truly slow-burn romance. And by truly, I mean seriously truly slow-burn. My god, I don’t think I’ve ever read a slow-burn as freaking slow as this one. But wow it was so worth the snail pacing of their relationship. Speaking of the relationship, I need to talk about our two main characters.

We’ve got Vanessa who is super in debt and has been working as a famous football player’s (Aiden) assistant in every way possible for two years by the start of the story. She finally has enough in her savings to quit and focus on her graphic design freelance career, so she leaves and over a month later her boss is at her door asking her to marry him so he could get his US citizenship. The rest of the story is about the progression of their relationship after they get married and move in with each other. Unfortunately this book was written solely in Vanessa’s POV, and I say unfortunately because I would’ve really loved to have some Aiden POV chapters too. He’s not exactly a hardcore brooder, but he’s also not super open about himself either so at times it was REALLY hard to gauge what was going on in his brain. Despite this fact, it became really obvious that he was falling for Vanessa because he started doing more and more stuff for her as their relationship progressed. There were so two scenes in particular where all he did was just show up and be endearingly supportive and I was ready to bawl my eyes out over how uplifting it all was. 

The Wall of Winnipeg and Me is just one hell of an uplifting and puts-a-smile-on-your-face type of romance. It’s incredibly slow, and at some parts you may be like “oh my god jUST KISS ALREADY!” but when it all inevitably falls in place by the end you will realize just how worth it the ride was. Zapata does an amazing job of portraying a really healthy loving relationship where both members are just so supportive of each other and genuinely want the best for each other. They are actually relationship goals!! I was actually kind of SAD when I finished this book because despite the happy ending I just needed more wholesomeness. And even more unfortunately, there is no sequel and there is no add-on telling the story from Aiden’s POV. So for anyone who’s looking for a healthy dose of wholesomeness, wants something to tug at their heartstrings, and doesn’t mind just a little bit of sex, this book is 5/5 perfection.

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Last book will be one that I just finished reading about an hour ago, The Kiss Thief by L.J. Shen. Now this one I kind of had to debate on for a little bit before I ultimately decided to read it. I found it on Goodreads around the same time I found The Wall of Winnipeg and Me, but after reading its synopsis the first time I got a little bit turned off by it. Not sure why, and I’m not sure what changed my mind but I ended up giving it a try earlier this afternoon and well well well what do you know I ended up reading it all in almost one sitting. The Kiss Thief, like the previous two books I reviewed in this post, is also a New Adult book (with more graphic scenes than Deviant Lies actually) featuring an enemies-to-lovers relationship between a 19-year-old daughter of a mobster and a 30-year-old US senator. Yep, that’s an 11-year age gap right there. Probably one of the most drastic age gaps I’ve seen in a book, but hey I guess some people are into those. The Chicago mobster’s daughter is named Francesca, and her dad gives her away to Wolfe Keaton for marriage due to reasons that become apparent much later on in the book. This book not only depicts the progression of Francesca and Wolfe’s relationship, but also of Francesca’s growth from a sheltered child into a woman. 

Francesca pretty much grew up as a princess, went to an elite boarding school in Europe for most of her life, and was super sheltered. To top it all off, she belonged to an incredibly old-fashioned “traditional” family where women were not expected to go to college but instead stayed at home and pumped out heirs while their husbands told them what to do. Francesca basically grew up her whole life thinking this was her destiny, along with marrying her childhood crush Angelo. But she gets thrown into Wolfe’s arms pretty quickly and early on in the book, and all hell breaks loose as these two absolutely chaotic crackheads go head-to-head with each other. Wolfe is seeking vengeance (why are all the angsty romance novels always centered around seeking revenge?) over something Francesca’s father did, while Francesca just wants to go home and be with Angelo. But things start to change when Francesca realizes Wolfe is actually willing to offer her certain freedoms that her father would never allow. Some of these freedoms include learning how to drive and going to college. 

While Wolfe is ultimately the hero to our heroine, he’s such an asshat for maybe the first 50% of the book. He’s broken (just like every single male love interest in every single book ever) for reasons that occurred in his past, he’s hell bent on revenge, and he’s vowed to never take a wife or fall in love. Obviously this all changes once he is engaged to Francesca, whose own stubbornness, willpower, and innocence takes him on one hell of a roller coaster of emotions. These two, and their relationship, are incredibly explosive but good god half the time they are SO toxic for each other. Their relationship is like the epitome of that one couple you know where they keep breaking up and getting back together again, or they keep getting into fights due to miscommunication, or they keep cheating on each other because the other did it first. When their relationship is good it’s pretty dang good, but when it goes south everything just turns into a living nightmare. I definitely wouldn’t recommend this book to people who are easily triggered by toxic relationships (and I mean truly emotionally toxic relationships), but outside of that it’s definitely not a bad read at all. The progression of Francesca and Wolfe’s relationship is actually relatively unique because it’s anything but linear. There are so many ups and so many downs, which makes the peaking points even more heart-wrenching in my opinion. Especially towards the end, the scene between Wolfe and Francesca’s father. Oh god, my heart couldn’t take it anymore. After this book I’m going to need to find a nice YA fantasy book that tones down the romance. And the steaminess, because The Kiss Thief definitely had PLENTY of those. I think of the three books I reviewed in this post, The Kiss Thief is the most graphic (although tbh I think its sex scenes are the most well written of the three). I’m thinking this book gets a 4/5 from me because while it’s good, I didn’t think there was anything about it that made it really special for me. It simply told an entertaining story, it had a unique progression of enemies-to-lovers, and the character progression of the heroine was fairly believable. 

In conclusion I recommend Devious Lies and The Kiss Thief for those looking for an angsty romance, and The Wall of Winnipeg and Me for those looking for wholesome slow-burn that will leave your heart feeling kinda fuzzy.

#book reviews #new adult #devious lies #parker huntington #the wall of winnipeg and me #mariana zapata #the kiss thief #lj shen #contemporary romance #romance #slow burn romance #enemies-to-lovers

[arethereanyoriginalusernames]

Why the Prince is… a very strange choice of a show

Disclaimer- I am not some “die hard defender” of the royal family. I neither care much about them, or for them. Honestly, most of the time, I don’t pay attention to whatever they’re fucking doing over there.

The point of this… essay is to explain why the Prince has one of the most bizarre and uncreative executions I’ve seen in a while.

And I’m not just talking about the art style! Although that certainly warrants its own discussion. Aside from the obvious unpleasantness of the style, a lot of the caricatures don’t make much sense, and it’s only applied to a few characters while everyone else just looks like a standard person.

But let’s discuss… not the story, because there isn’t really a story here. Let’s discuss how this show decided to execute its concept of “let’s poke fun at the royal family”.

And don’t get me wrong, I’m not against that premise. There’s a lot to poke fun at/critique about the royal family. But as I’ll get into here,

A lot of the “jokes” about the royal family don’t make any sense.

Firstly, something I watched recently before making this post is this one by khadija mbowe

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Sm_tKLfusrY

I recommend watching her video if you’re interested in actual criticism and analysis of the royal family and how they’re portrayed. And it’ll help you realize how flat the Prince falls

Because despite there being a lot to talk about regarding the royal family, the show does almost nothing to point out anything about the royal family.

Let’s go around, shall we, to everyone in the family?

The children

I know I said that I don’t care much about the royal family, and I still don’t. I assume they can handle something like this.

But I draw the line at the kids.

I want you guys to keep something in mind. Prince George is 8 years old. Princess Charlotte is 6 years old. Prince Louis is 3 years old.

Now, with their ages in mind, mind if I ask why;

George is portrayed as a sadistic gay stereotype

Louis is portrayed as an aggressive caveman like character

And Charlotte is portrayed as a Russian Robot Spy?

Did nobody in the writing room not think “hey, isn’t portraying real children who probably have just learned the ABCs as abusive, sadistic, horrible people a little weird?” How did nobody find it awkward to portray the kids in this way? Yes, I’m sure they’re spoiled and have all sorts of luxuries at their fingertips. But we’ve seen the result of portraying kids as villains/spoiled in media (hey Dance Moms, how you doing?)

Basically, the Prince portrays the main character Prince George as Stewie Griffin if Stewie Griffin acted stereotypically gay and had a terrible British accent. Yeah.

And the show’s version of George is incredibly unlikeable and… not funny. And here we get our first glance at an ongoing trend in the show

Why do the kids act the way they do? What about the real Prince George made the readers think “oh let’s write him as a boomer’s idea of a sassy gen Z kid and make him use words like ‘canceled’, ‘yaas’, ‘boss bitch’, etc”? Nothing! They just gave him that personality because…. Internet slang + flamboyant femme boys funny? I guess?

The princess is a robot sent by the Russians because… just because. And Louis is super aggressive and deep voiced with a cave man brain because… I guess that’s funny???

Not only is the portrayal of the kids super uncomfortable, but it’s clear that no thought went into the personalities. They just used shit they likely saw in other cartoons and lazily slapped it on.

Everyone else

Going back to my point of a lot of the jokes and portrayals don’t make sense, let’s start with Harry and Megan.

Megan does… nothing really. She’s there… she’s kind of bitchy. Because why not I guess. All they say is that… her acting career went down the drain. Wow. Amazing. Riveting comedy.

Harry is super confusing. He’s portrayed as this guy who’s so used to royal life, he can’t function in middle class life. This is just a lazy royal stereotype, and it doesn’t even really apply to Harry that well. The guy fought in Afghanistan, and has had more interaction with the public than a lot of the other royals. Why would he not be able to figure out middle class society? And it’s not like Harry’s well known for doing anything like “hey fellow kids!” Or anything that would imply a misunderstanding of anything non royalty. Again, it just feels like a stereotype lazily slapped onto a character. Like… the Prince’s depiction of Harry can’t figure out a fridge. What. How? How is this a joke about Prince Harry?

Prince Charles is portrayed as a resentful mummy’s boy. Wow, a vaguely fitting joke! Except it’s one that’s been used over and over again before I was even born. Great job show, so original! And the only thing going on with Camilla is that she doesn’t talk and nobody likes her. That’s the entire joke.

William and Kate are a stereotypical white married couple who hate each other. And that’s it. They make passive aggressive remarks to each other. Wow. So clever.

Prince Phillip… had a portrayal that already dated the show horribly, let me leave it there.

And the Queen is just angry, violent and says swear words all the time. That’s her entire character. I’m not joking- out of everything you could say about the queen, the best they could do was “she’s a bad bitch”. Could we perhaps get a slow, sympathy clap? For the minimal effort?

The “Plot”

I mean… they start with ideas. Then they forget whatever they were doing and go do whatever the fuck. They rarely address the story they set up. They’ll introduce something like a school play, and not only not show the play, but also barely focus on it. And this “play” thing was supposed to be a three part story.

Yeah.

Story structure, something you learn about in elementary school, is something this show can’t accomplish. And this was a tv show deemed good enough to be released to the public as a finished product.

——————-

Something I find far more hilarious than anything in the show is the fact that the show feels the need to put this notice up before the show starts, which tells people not to be offended.

Why do I find this the funniest part about the show?

Because why would I be offended by something that clearly doesn’t even want to put in the effort to be “controversial”. The most this show will give you is a bored “…really?”

I’ve seen people refer to stories and shows as “having no thought put into them”

Empress Theresa, one of the worst books in existence, had more thought put into it than this show. This post has more thought put into it than this show.

Guys, this show is what “having no effort put in” looks like. And I wanted to talk about it as an example of such.

In conclusion, if anyone feels like their story is “too simple”, or that their writing sucks too much to be shared with others…

This shit is a tv show. Deemed good enough to be released to the public.

I’m sure you’re story isn’t the worst.

Anyways, hope everyone enjoyed the disorganized babbling.

I apologize for wasting your time

- Spooky S Skeletons

#Youtube

[alyssawritesalot]

Just a Smile - Part Three

(I’m posting this early on tumblr because I love you guys, shhh don’t tell the followers on ff)

FF.NET

SUMMARY: In Hyrule palace, there was one rule left over from the time of her great-grandfather, one that most certainly could not be broken: the guards on duty were not allowed to laugh.

But that never stopped Princess Zelda from trying. Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five

Zelink AU where Zelda is a princess and Link is a guard who she’s trying to make laugh but can’t seem to crack. Part two of a larger fic of similar short bursts. Not attached to any particular game. Fluff af.

“What do you think of him?”

The King’s mustache quivered as he turned to look at his daughter, his eyes glimmering with mirth. “I hadn’t realized you cared so much about my personal opinion of every soldier, dove.”

He knew about her antics just as well as anyone; she didn’t hide the way she spent her free time. She had to wonder, however, how much the other soldiers reported how much time she spent with Link. If her father was curious as to why she hadn’t yet moved on.

Well, she decided, taking a deep breath, there was only one way to find out.

“Not every soldier, papa,” she said. “Just Soldier Cearneigh.”

Writing after the cut!

A choking sound drifted down the hallway to where Zelda and her father were walking.

Smug, she bit back a smile.

Close. She had been so close. It wouldn’t be long now until he broke. She would get her smile, and just in time for her to start her work on the new recruits that were due to start training in a few days. She would be able to spend all her time learning their names and what made them tick, since she wouldn't have to bother thinking up new ways to get Link to break. She wouldn’t have to be around him at all, actually.

The thought nearly made her trip over her own feet.

At her stumble, her father patted her arm. “Slippery floor, darling?” he asked lightly, and she let out a breathy laugh, too stupefied at her realization to respond.

Link had become such a staple of her days these last few months. The thought of just passing him by, day after day, was almost unthinkable after all the time they had spent together. Yes, she wanted to see him smile, wanted it more than she’d wanted anything in a long while. But did she want that at the expense of his company?  

Her lip twisted as she walked.

She wasn’t sure she had the answer to that question.

Instead, she turned to her father, brushing her free hand along his arm to get his attention.

“Papa,” she asked quietly, carefully, “What’s your opinion of Soldier Cearneigh?”

“He’s a valuable asset to our arsenal,” the King returned.

“Yes,” she agreed, as anyone in the castle would. It was a bland opinion, and they both knew it. “But what do you think of him?”

The King’s mustache quivered as he turned to look at his daughter, his eyes glimmering with mirth. “I hadn’t realized you cared so much about my personal opinion of every soldier, dove.”

He knew about her antics just as well as anyone; she didn’t hide the way she spent her free time. She had to wonder, however, how much the other soldiers reported how much time she spent with Link. If her father was curious as to why she hadn’t yet moved on.

Well, she decided, taking a deep breath, there was only one way to find out.

“Not every soldier, papa,” she said. “Just Soldier Cearneigh.”

The King guffawed. “Am I to finally learn of your intentions with the poor lad, then?”

She felt her cheeks color. “There are no intentions.”

“And I am not the King of Hyrule.” 

“Papa!”

He reached up to tweak her nose, and she squeaked. “Be true, dearest,” he said, “And I shall give you the whole of my opinion.”

For a moment, she was silent. Truthfully, she had never once thought beyond anything more than getting her smile. Once she won, she moved on to her next victim. There had never been a person that had lasted so long.

But was it just that unwavering discipline that made him so intriguing to her? No, she didn’t think so. Plenty of men had been resistant to her games, and it hadn’t been different with them. So was it his looks? His accent? Or was it the fact that their exchanges had become just as much of a challenge for him as it was for her?

“He doesn’t just...concede.”

The King only looked at her, waiting for her to continue.

“It’s...he’s…” She fought for the words. “He doesn’t bend to my will. Even when it would be much easier for him to just give in, he refuses. He has...integrity. Resilience of character, I suppose. And he makes me smile.”

It was a lame way to end a short speech of praise, but even so, her father chuckled.

“Remarkable insight, dearest,” he said to her, disentangling from her grasp and patting her arm. “As it happens, I have business to attend to.”

“What?”

He started off to their right, towards the stairs that would lead him to the barracks. “I’ve only just remembered that I have matters to discuss with my brother.”

Uncle Gustaf? How could he possibly forget?

“But what of your opinions on Soldier Cearneigh?” she asked, and he grinned.

“I suppose you’ll find out soon enough, dove,” he said, and winked.

But Zelda was never one to be kept waiting.

Although she was sure there were many things her father didn’t tell her, there were very few that he deliberately kept from her once she asked about them.

She knew that he would tell her eventually, or he wouldn’t have said, but still...she was a woman of action. Sitting idle was not one of her strong suits.

She took to passing through the East Wing every morning on her walks.

It wasn’t a place that she went to often. Connected to the barracks, it was often lined with soldiers and military officers and pages sending messages back and forth. Besides the occasional venture here to meet an unsuspecting victim, there wasn’t much reason for Zelda to go. A place of planning, there were no diversions for a someone such as her.

But it was where General Prince Gustaf kept his office, and if she had any hope of overhearing what plans her father had for Link, it would be there.

And so, before she spent her daily quarter-hour prodding at Link, she carried a book to the wing, pretending to read as she walked through the busy halls. Sometimes she would sit, if that was attracting too much attention. But all the while, she kept her ears open for any glimmer of gossip about the soldier.

While she was at it, she listened for what made her men laugh. There were many soldiers in their plain clothes about, and without the restrictions that came with their uniform, they smiled and joked without restraint.

Link found his friends among these men, after all. Perhaps they had the same sense of humor.

But all the things that had them throwing their heads back and laughing like she wanted Link to just made her confused. Inside jokes about certain captains or patrol rotations or training gaffs went far beyond her. All the little pranks that she saw them pulling on each other--many of which were ripped from her, she noted with no little pride--she had already tried with Link. And everything else was just stupid. Lewd remarks and thoughtless one-liners and name-calling.

“--C’mon, Baker! What do you have to say to that?” one soldier called as she passed by one day, not having received the reaction he wanted from his friend. 

“You’ll have to try again, Abernathy,” replied another, grinning widely, “Baker’s so poor he can’t even pay attention.”

The group of boys roared, and Zelda scoffed, rolling her eyes.

That was such a cheap joke. No finesse at all. Honestly, they were such amateurs.

She was beginning to think this was all a sad waste of her time. It had been days, and she not only hadn’t heard a word about her father’s plans, but she also hadn’t gotten any new ideas to get Link. With all the time she had been spending here instead of doing serious research, she was running out. Soon, she’d have to go into reruns.

Shudder the thought.

“That one was weak,” a voice called above the others, and Zelda looked up.

Leaning against the wall, one man had his arms crossed as he rolled his eyes at his friend. “It’s just that pigs like you can’t take a joke, Archer,” he said, and the group around him seemed to brace themselves. The man’s lip twitched. “You’re all such bores.”

All right, that was it. She needed to get out of here, and quickly.

Abruptly, she stood, shutting her book and whirling around in the same moment. Only, of course, to collide with someone going in the opposite direction.

She squeaked, dropping her book.

“I beg your pardon--” she began, at the same time the man said, “Goddesses, I’m sorry--”

They both bent to pick up the book, colliding heads in the process.

Knocked off-balance, she would have fallen were it not for the quick arm that wrapped around her waist. He steadied her before looking to her face, glancing up at the same time she did.

The breath whooshed from her chest at the sight of him, her eyes going wide.

It was Link. Millimeters away. His arm wrapped around her waist. 

And he wasn’t in uniform.

#just a smile #zelink au #zelink fluff #zelink #zelink fanfiction #link x zelda #writing #legend of zelda