#Grew up mormon can u tell.

[imeverywoman420]

If you grew up in the west and not in a mormon compound or something and became a tradwife and then ur husband runs out on you or something idk what to tell you because i know adults have been telling you since you were a child you cannot be a housewife and its unrealistic to want to survive on other people. Like you have to disappoint SEVERAL highschool guidance counselors to get to this point… like i KNOW i was an annoying highschooler once i was like i just wanna be a housewife <3 nobody cheers and applauds ! People will tell you thats dumb as hell.

Like sorry if ur tradhusband runs off and leaves you with the baby like a thousand condolences queen but… u cannot tell me with a straight face you didnt see this coming. You cannot tell me a thousand people did not tell you to your face you cannot depend on a man for money because the hand that feeds you can starve you. Like even Republican parents are not telling their little girls to be housewives that is a FRINGE belief for people outside of Online to hold irl. Republicans want little girlboss daughters that open small businesses.

[jewpacabruhs]

bruv im still jus. wow. theres so much to say but. do u kno how good it feels... to be jewish, to accidentally fixate on one eric cartman & love him more than any other fictional character for almost seven years now, and then to see him in a little yarmulke, standing at kyle's side while he recites from the torah? do you know how validating that is?

i gotta get personal for a second here. idk how, but in the last few yrs my relationship with my own jewishness has been deeply influenced and intertwined with south park, as ironic and ridiculous as that sounds. i grew up secular, completely nonpracticing; as a child, i was only ethnically jewish, and saw jews as strictly an ethnicity, and a popularly hated one to boot. and it scared me. ive talked about it before, but as a child hearing about the shoah and about antisemitism, i couldn't understand. i thought it was looks for a while, which confused me, because ive got blonde hair and blue eyes and all my family that got caught up in nazi europe did/do too. i remember thinking as a second grader that i would've been spared for that reason; why didn't a good chunk of my family? but i grew up in a mormon neighborhood, with plenty of other blonde kids, and they stayed away from me like i had a disease. this was before puberty, before my hair got a little frizzier and my nose got a little bigger, when i looked just like any of them. but already, at age 8, i was an outsider. i wasn't one of them and i never would be, and they wanted me to know that.

and then i started to get it. it clicked even more once i got to high school and got called a kike every other day - but prior to high school, you know what i found, and you know what really pushed me towards understanding what being a secular jew in america meant? south park. and as a dumb little sixth grader with no critical thinking skills, you know what shaped my opinions on my own people? south park.

and that's good and bad. good because i do sincerely think kyle broflovski is excellent fictional representation for jewish people, maybe one of the top few ever shown on television. he gets on my nerves at times, but he's good through and through, he's well written and multi-dimensional, he's not a walking stereotype but he still has prominent jewish features that jewish viewers can look at and see in themselves, his morals and viewpoints and beliefs are obviously deeply influenced by judaism, hes deeply proud of his heritage and culture... and that all means a lot to me. and by the amount of jewish sp fans that adore kyle, it means a lot to them too.

the bad thing is, yeah, i can't deny it, during older seasons, cartman's treatment of kyle probably taught a lot of young and dumb viewers how to view jews in real life. have i, as a kyman shipper and cartman stan, justified that within a fictional and narrative context? yes. but it doesn't change the real-world effect; south park, but specifically cartman, since he's the mouthpiece, likely did cause some easily-influenced people to pick up antisemitic beliefs. did this contribute to the rise of the alt-right? debatable, but to some extent, possibly. was that m&t's intention and should south park be canceled and denounced? fuck no, i'll always love it lol, and fuck censorship. but it is something that should be taken into account.

matt and trey clearly regret that, and understand that it's no longer acceptable or fitting or needed in today's sociopolitical climate - or, okay, maybe they don't even regret it; they just understand that when fiction becomes reality, the fictional jackass isn't necessary when there's one right there in real life, sitting in the oval office, yeah? old cartman doesn't deserve or need a voice, not when real, awful people actually have one right now. and m&t are actively trying to change cartman for the better and really, really backpedal on his bigotry, while still doing it in a way that makes sense from a story-telling perspective. it's not a complete uncharacteristic change of character; it's shifting with the times and writing it into the character's arc so that it's a logical and plausible development in cartman's story.

cartman's behavior in the last few seasons is consistent character development. m&t themselves are pushing it, and clearly it's sincere; cartman's not faking. unless they're building up a surprise twist over the last, what, three to four seasons, that he was faking the whole time! woah! if so it better be a damn good pay off, because that's a lot of time invested. though that seems more forward-thinking than sp tends to be. they're intentionally stuck in the short-term, aren't they? plot-wise. but their character development is pretty long-term, and right now, cartman is consistently decent, and if it comes across as faking, it's because cartman's over-dramatic in how he speaks, and trey does that intentionally.

that's a tonal thing, and it's hard to say in a fictional character, but as someone who struggles with empathy myself, empathy and sincerity don't go hand in hand. you can lack empathy while still caring enough to sincerely and wholeheartedly apologize for something and mean that apology. not feeling remorse doesn't mean you can't apologize genuinely; the two don't go hand in hand. you can be mentally ill in any capacity, even a psychopath, and still deeply care about things or people, just not in the way someone else might. so you can headcanon that cartman's still a psycho/sociopath, though right now that's actually kinda going against canon, but don't rain on other's parades if they're happy he's exhibiting healthy growth. besides, and i repeat: what could cartman exploit out of faking sincerity for several seasons? nothing, so why bother? he wouldn't, unless it's literal in-show subconscious growth.

does that mean he's magically developed empathy? no. is it becoming less probable he's a legitimate sociopath/psychopath (while still possibly having better-disguised antisocial tendencies)? yes. does he seem to have better coping or anger management skills? somehow, yes! he seems to be legitimately healthier. does this mean he's no longer accountable for his past misdeeds, and even his present, less-severe ones? of course not! and you can still hate him all you want, but modern cartman is not the same as older cartman, and shouldn't be treated as such. because is this growth? absolutely.

he's clearly healthier, even happier. he's less angry, he's still a little shit but he no longer relies on bigotry or cruelty or anger to get the negative attention he thrives off, rather he gravitates towards being simply annoying. you know why he called ice? pettiness, immaturity, a little bit of spite, and a need for silly revenge. he's being intentionally petty, but going about it in a sly but no longer psychopathic way. less hannibal lector and more, idk, regina george, lol. extremely different on the antagonist scale. and cartman's been both.

and maybe it's personal bias on what type of human is worse within fiction, someone unstable and bizarre with violent tendencies (which is how he's come to be viewed in pop culture & some of the fandom, as a result of eps like scott tenorman must die), versus someone inclined towards pettiness and more silent and, i dunno, social-status-and-pride-driven types of revenge (cartman in general when he's not being particularly awful, tbh)... but i think it'd be pretty universally agreed that the latter is at the very least more tolerable, manageable, and even likeable - and certainly more redeemable. let's put it this way; if cartman continued on the path he was on, he'd be one of those tiki holding fucks, wearing a confederate flag hat, and he'd treat kyle soooo much worse. instead, m&t have turned him into a hypocritical false-woke ignorant dumbass - but that's strongly less problematique than it's counterpart, and it works.

because cartman simply serves a different narrative purpose now. and that's not sloppy writing; it's well-timed evolution of a character that stepped into a pre-9/11, pre-trump, pre-social media world! so much has changed, and south park is reflecting that in its characters, most notably in a character who was stuck in the, what, 1960s with his beliefs? that was fine way back when, but matt&trey are smart dudes - they understand that sometimes things have to change. besides, they love cartman, too. he's their favorite. but they understand that when real people act like him, it's not so comedic or satirical or funny, & they don't want to look at cartman, at their creation who they've invested twenty-two years in, and see the all-too-real hate of modern radical white america.

i think we know enough about matt&trey's social stances these days, and the empathy they've seemed to develop after having kids, to understand that they're no longer in their "apathy is best, everyone is stupid" phase. current south park is left-leaning and admittedly preachy at times, but i wouldn't want it any other way. g-d knows it's better this way than if they'd embraced and decided to appeal to their right-libertarian following instead. cartman's evolved in a progressive and positive way, and it's fucking dope, especially to us cartman stans who so badly want him to be good. and he is good right! he's doing so good!

and i know im up my own ass rn but yall know how much i myself have campaigned for jewish kyman/cartman and how much i just deeply and truly adore it, and to see it actualized in a canon episode to some extent? that meant the world to me. i couldn't believe my eyes. i was tellin lai - that's the most genuine, pure, almost violent happiness ive felt in my soul in years. that was like a straight shot of serotonin to the heart. that simple little scene made me so fucken happy yall dont even know. & theres a lot to be said about the political commentary and plenty of other people are analyzing that, but im a simple jewish kyman & cartman stan and boy ive been fed good fjskfkdkdkfk!!!

#in other news #sickly jew shay had her vision white out at school today and almost fell down the stairs #my grandpa has been given a week to live #AND the anniversary of the most important person in my life's death is approaching #and i turn fucking 19 soon and i always have birthday crisises #so fucken superb! #in happier news family guy airs soon and it's unfortunately still a fixation of mine so im unjustly excited #lissen stewie's worn a yarmulke twice in fg canon and i cried then #i love cartman approximately... 50x more than stewie jus bc of longevity and. nostalgia and favoritism #i was in legitimate hysterics #sp continues to be my light at the end of the tunnel jfkskf #mine #txt #sp spoilers #theres so much here im sorry i ramble sm #i struggle w wordz and usin em ironically

[luvrgirl555]

get to know me uncomfortably well

thanks for tagging me syd!! i’m doing this one to make up for all the other ones i had no motivation to do i’m sorry )): i love you so much @pitoftrash

1. What’s your middle name?

elizabeth

2. How old are you?

simultaneously an enthusiastic mom, your dad and eating like a 7 year old

3. When is your birthday?

may 30th!!

4. What’s your zodiac sign?

gemini!! moon in aquarius and sag rising 

5. What’s your favourite colour?

red and g o l d

6. What’s your lucky number?

i don’t really have one? but 5 has consistently been in my life so let’s go with that

7. Do you have any pets?

the prettiest cat named sadie!!

8. Where are you from?

a small farm town in central utah!! everyone talks like a hick and i kinda have a stupid drawl

9. How tall are you?

5’2″ boys

10. What shoe size are you?

women’s size 5 

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

my feet haven’t grown since straight up 5th grade so like 30 pairs?

12. What was your last dream about?

i don’t remember my dreams

13. What talents do you have?

being a dumb bitch, falling for people who are emotionally broken, being bad at math, flirting and i have good fashion sense

14. Are you psychic in any way?

does being empath count as being psychic?

15. Favourite song?

this is a fuckin impossible question but right now i’m rlly into girl in red and girls by her fuckin slaps @pitoftrash it’s our sad indie shit and it’s GAY you’d love it (of all the time: somebody to love or under pressure by queen)

16. Favourite movie?

the breakfast club cause i’m basic

17. Who would be your ideal partner?

someone who loves unconditionally, willing to listen to my shit, goes on adventures with me, kisses lots, tons of cuddles, sings with me in the car, will talk about the things they like and let their eyes light up, funny

18. Do you want children?

i do!! but bringing a child into this world right now feels so selfish and there are so many kids out there who need loving homes so i wanna become their bisexual mom (:

19. Do you want a church wedding?

not really. i want a huge wedding that’s so fucking extra and over the top and god probably doesn’t wanna see that so

20. Are you religious?

i grew up mormon (yes i know it’s basically a cult) but do i believe in god? not really.

21. Have you ever been to the hospital?

i have been inside a hospital but i have never ever been admitted

22. Have you ever gotten in trouble with the law?

it was a dumb idea okay

and i’m a shitty driver

23. Have you met any celebrities?

my cousin was on agt???

24. Baths or showers?

showers mostly but i love a good bath bomb

25. What colour of socks are you wearing?

i'm not wearing socks

26. Have you ever been famous?

bruh that’s my dream

27. What type of music do you like?

all types really!! i’m into classic rock, alternative/punk, sad indie shit, i LOVE country and pop!!

28. Have you ever been skinny dipping?

no but i wannaaa

30. How many pillows do you sleep with?

f i v e but they’re only around me and not actually underneath me

31. What position do you sleep in?

only ever on my back or else my back is fucked the next day

32. How big is your house?

pretty big for like the general house size?? but pretty small by utah’s standards.

33. What do you typically have for breakfast?

i never eat breakfast 

34. Have you ever fired a gun?

nope and i have no desire to

35. Have you ever tried archery?

yeah!! it was fun but i’m shit

36. Favourite clean word?

dang dang diggity dang a dang

37. Favourite swear word?

hella or fuck

38. What’s the longest you’ve gone without sleeping?

4 days

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?

no lmao someone pls be into me

41. Are you a good liar?

yeah, i’m a gemini what do u expect

42. Are you a good judge of character?

my vision gets pretty fogged up by what people want to show me and what i want to see

43. Can you do any other accents than your own?

specifically, cockney and we did newsies last year for musical theatre so i can do a pretty mean manhattan accent y’all

44. Do you have a strong accent?

if i am talking loudly or passionately my hick/drawl kinda comes out oops

45. What’s your favourite accent?

australian

46. What is your personality type?

enfp

47. What’s your most expensive piece of clothing?

oh god!! my hoco dress was 90 bucks probably that?

48. Can you curl your tongue?

sure can!

49. Are you an innie or an outie?

innie (:

50. Left of right handed?

right-handed

51. Are you scared of spiders?

yeh i’m scared of all bugs including honeybees but that doesn’t mean they don’t deserve rights

52. Favourite food?

i <<3 italian food and also chinese-american food!!

53. Favourite foreign food?

i do like korean food

54. Are you a clean or messy person?

messy but like organized messy

55. Most used phrase?

oh my god! or omg

56. Most used word?

aw

57. How long does it take you to get ready?

like glam? 45 minutes but i hate waking up and can b ready in 15 

58. Do you have much of an ego?

it rlly depends like the stars rlly need to be aligned

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops?

suck ;)

60. Do you talk to yourself?

a l w a y s

61. Do you sing to yourself?

(syd u do smile when u sing omg) and yes!! i sing all the time

62. Are you a good singer?

n o pe

63. Biggest fear?

failure, being taken advantage of, being hated

64. Are you a gossip?

i hate myself for it but yes

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?

idrk??? i donn’t watch a lot of movies??

66. Do you like long or short hair?

i’m a sucker for long hair

67. Can you name all 50 states in America?

and the capitals too

68. Favourite school subject?

history, musical theatre, english, sociology

69. Extrovert or introvert?

probably extrovert

70. Have you ever been scuba diving?

nooooooo but i really really want to!!

71. What makes you nervous?

ghosts

72. Are you scared of the dark?

ghosts live in the dark

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?

not most of the time

74. Are you ticklish?

yeah

75. Have you ever started a rumour?

nope never

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority?

i’m on drama presidency at school?

77. Have you ever drank underage?

nuh uh

78. Have you ever done drugs?

nope 

79. Who was your first real crush?

tbh rachel greene i grew up watching friends and she was hot

80. How many piercings do you have?

1 set, but i want more!

81. Can you roll your R’s?

i had no idea this was a special skill but yes!!

82. How fast can you type?

not bad but not great

83. How fast can you run?

not my thing

84. What colour is your hair?

blonde

85. What colour are your eyes?

green

86. What are you allergic to?

i’m lactose intoleranat, and i’m allergic to tomatoes 

87. Do you keep a journal?

only for like rlly important evants or things i need to talk about but can’t tell anyone about @pitoftrash is kinda my diary

88. What do your parents do?

my mom is a respiratory therapist a childrens hospital and my dad is a private loan officer

89. Do you like your age?

hmmm yes?? but i’d rather go back in time or forward bc rn it’s kind an awkward age of being able to do Stuff but nothing worthwhile

90. What makes you angry?

politics, ignorance, prejudice, homophobia, pro-life people, right wing america, donald trump

91. Do you like your own name?

yeah but sometimes i wish it had an easier nickname

92. Have you already thought about baby names? And if so, what are they?

i love the names rowan and christian

93. Do you want a boy or girl for a child?

either, it doesn’t matter their sex, gender or sexuality to me (:

94. What are your strengths?

n/a

95. What are your weaknesses?

bruh i’m clingy and talk too much

96. How did you get your name?

my dad always wanted to name a child sarah elizabeth?????

97. Were your ancestors royalty?

actually i’m directly danish royalty!!

98. Do you have any scars?

stretch marks and like self harm scars

99. Colour of your bedspread?

white and gold

100. Colour of your room?

off white with yellowish undertones

#tag game #sorry for the scroll #do this u guys and tag me if u do!!

[smalltalktorture]

fob, album by album. gimmie your history with the band. pls.

what a cool question. okay! ETA: this is long as shit i’m sorry

so i got into fob at the tender age of eleven (and a HALF) when futct came out. christ. i’m ancient. several things drew me to the band, but none so much as my very mormon father telling me in no uncertain terms that i was not to listen to that band.

so thanks dad! you’re how i found my favorite band!

sugar was the first song i ever listened to by fob, so it has a very special place in my heart. but i also shouted along to all the other songs, standing on my bed, door locked while my dad pounded to be let in. i had to buy five cds because my dad kept breaking them. 

so then ioh comes out. ioh is a hard album for me in a lot of ways. i had just been removed from my home by my stepmom, who didn’t want to raise kids that weren’t her own. it was rough. 

my grandma took me in and gave me ioh for my birthday that year. i listened to it so much i broke my stereo. hum hallelujah still gives me a visceral reaction to That Time for me, and it’s become one of my favorite songs because it helps me remember that anger and heartbreak in a more healthy way. i listen to that song when i feel sad and i classically conditioned myself to stop being sad when it ends. 

i’m just starting high school when folie comes out and i’m horrendously disappointed. i know that’s an opinion that will get me absolutely crucified most places, but i have to say it’s my least favorite album. i was a depressed mess and i felt like my favorite band had failed me. and then they went on hiatus and i thought they would never come back. i thought the band i poured my soul into was gone forever. 

high school was a dark time for many reasons, but this didn’t help. 

i’ll skip soul punk bcs that’s a five page essay by itself. 

so i’m a sophomore in college when fob comes off hiatus. srar drops and i’m in love. there they were! and yeah, sure, it’s not the same fob. i think we’d have a problem if it was the same fob, because the same fob that went on hiatus needed to end for them to come back and be successful. 

but man! hearing patrick’s voice again and knowing it was in the context of fob meant the world. it’s one of my favorite albums ever, and maybe it’s the nostalgia factor, but you can play any track off srar and instantly cheer me up. i have you are what you love, not who loves you tattooed on me, for christ’s sake.

then my whole world fell apart. now, looking back, i laugh at myself because the breakup i went through is so insignificant in my life now, but at the time, man, i suffered. and ab/ap had just come out. and i had angry breakup songs galore! it didn’t resonate with me quite as much as srar but it grew on me. especially fourth of july. i literally never skip that song when it comes up on shuffle. 

it felt like it took forever for mania to come. i was unhappy with young and menace, but once i heard the rest of the album, i understood. wow. i genuinely believe that mania is one of the best albums ever. period. the lyrics punch me in the gut every time i hear them, and the musicality is downright genius. i hear a lot of complaints that mania “isn’t a real fob album” and that people hate it. which is fine! if i’m allowed to dislike folie, you’re allowed to dislike mania. i just don’t get it. maybe we’re not listening to the same album, idk. but mania just feels right to me, you know? at this point in the band’s timeline? like it came in at the right moment and perfectly captured who they are now: not the fob of futct, not the ones who made a video of monkeys and kardashians, but a different fob. a sort of refined fob. 

mania is different and not everyone likes it. i don’t understand that, per se, but i do understand that they’re allowed to have opinions. but to me, mania is the best fall out boy album to date. maybe because it’s so different, maybe because for the first time, i had a fall out boy album that didn’t come out at the same time as something terrible in my life, so i didn’t attach it to any emotions, but i do think mania is amazing. i wish i was not half tired so i could adequately answer this question, but yeah. 

(fun fact the first leg of the mania tour was the worst concert i’ve ever attended for a variety of reasons, which is ironic to me lol)

jesus sorry this got so long and rambly. i love fall out boy, thank u, next.

#long post #anonymous #asks

[dealusis]

This is completely unfinished and unedited. I’m sure his character has actually changed SO MUCH since I initially wrote this so enjoy a Relic

OCs as Companions - “Bishop” Fallout New Vegas

Basic info:

Race: Human

Gender: Male

Affiliation: Independent, Courier *optional*

Role: Companion

Location: Pioneer Saloon, Lucky 38 Penthouse

Base SPECIAL: S2 P8 E4 C6 I10 A9 L1

Tagged skills: Medicine, Survival, Speech

Perks: Logan’s Loophole, Confirmed Bachelor, Fast Shot

You meet Bishop at the bar in the Pioneer Saloon. When approached, he asks you snidely if you’re looking for repentance too. If the courier says yes, he asks for 50 caps then expresses that he used to let people confess for free but caps became more important than his good faith. If the courier says no, he says that any church he belonged to is gone anyways, and that he lost his ticket to paradise years ago, but people pay good caps for a little reassurance and will continue to do it for a good price.

If the Courier has [Confirmed Bachelor], the option “I could use a little faith” will cause Bishop to flirt back. Asking him to follow you at this time will not result in recruitment.

Any option calling Bishop a Fraud or greedy will cause him to become completely unrecruitable.

Later, you meet Bishop again in the Lucky 38 after your first meeting with House. He says that he’s sorry for spying, but Benny’s too big of an idiot to be allowed out on his own.

Francis is now recruitable

If you called him mean names during your first meetings he’ll reside in the Lucky 38s Casino and be a big ol bitch.

Companion Perk: Faithful - Gives the Courier a higher chance of critical hits while using VATS

Companion Perk after Dealt a Bad Hand: Bishop gives the courier 33% bonus damage or some shit

Companion Comments:

Use Melee: “If you think that’s a good idea”, “If you want me to”

Use Ranged: “Good choice”

Open inventory: “No need to get handsy”, “Hey! Do unto others? please?”

Stay close: “We sure ain’t leavin’ room for Jesus like this”,

Keep distance: “agreed”

Be Passive: “Alright.”

Be Aggressive: fuck idk

Wait here: “Right.”

Follow me: “No time for drinking with you huh?”

Sneaking: “I’m thinking my hair might give me away.”

“Let’s travel together” (already have a companion): “I suppose three’s a crowd?”

Leaving companion at Lucky 38: <long drawn out sigh>

“I wanted to ask you some questions (pre Dealt A Bad Hand)”: “Sure, as long as you don’t pry.”

“Tell me about yourself”(pre Dealt A Bad Hand): Ain’t much to know. Grew up in a Vault. Families long dead. The usual wasteland shit.”

“I wanted to ask you some questions (post Dealt A Bad Hand): “Ask away.”

“Tell me about yourself”(post Dealt A Bad Hand): “Well, my first name's Francis. Bishop’s my last name. I was raised in an east coast vault, made my way over here after everyone else died some years back. I hopped from settlement to settlement before landin’ here. Never got to come here before the war so I figured it was now or never. Turned out to be one of the best decisions i’ve ever made”

“What do you think of the NCR?”: “Those republic types have always existed, pre and post war. They usually end up fallin’ in the end, regardless.

“What do you think of the Legion?”: Don’t that Caesar guy know what happened to the original?

“What do you think of Mister House?”: He’s my employer. I’d hesitate to call him anything other than that. We’d be friends, maybe. If he thought I wouldn’t betray him.

“What do you know about Benny?”: Bastards an idiot. I don’t know why House thought he would make a good protege when i’ve been the one pulling all the weight anyway.

“What do you know about the platinum chip?”: Just about as much as you.

Trivia and additional information:

Bishop is taller than most wastelanders

Male couriers with [Confirmed Bachelor] can flirt with Bishop I’d flirted with initially

Having a reputation higher than Neutral with Caesar's Legion will trigger a conversation in which Bishop bluntly tells you he’s only staying with you because of his obligations to Mr. House and that if it was his choice he’d have left you already. Bishops personal quest becomes locked as well as any additional dialogue.

Killing or Disabling Mr. House causes Bishop to begin a conversation where he says that he’s upset Mr. House’s knowledge is no longer attainable, but won’t leave or treat you any differently. He says that since he’s out of a job he might as well continue to work for you. (Edit: he def leaves u now if u kill him LOL)

Bishop has a 9mm pistol named “St. Francis” in his inventory, a twin model to Benny’s “Maria” as well as an old Vault canteen with no number.

Bishops’ default armor is lightweight leather armor

Bishop will comment on the Old Mormon Fort, saying that he’s happy the best parts of religion have survived the war.

Placing cigarettes, whiskey, or chems in Bishop’s inventory will cause them to disappear

Unmarked Quest Walking by my Side

Placing a Scripture book in Bishop’s inventory will trigger a conversation where he thanks you and tells you about his family's old church.

Personal Quest

Quest Triggers: Completing 6 quests with Bishop as a companion

Quest Description: Bishop starts dialogue with the Courier and asks them if they’ll help him collect the ingredients he needs to finish off an experimental chem he’s been perfecting. He keeps it’s function extremely secretive. The Courier needs to collect and mix together Bleak Venom, Absinthe, Psycho, and a Stimpak. The Courier has the option to replace 1 Item with a random material, like Nuka Cola or healing powder. After giving the mixture to Bishop he will explain that due to a mysterious serum he took after leaving his vault over 100 years ago, he can no longer age despite his non-ghoul state. After realizing he could not age he started trying to develop a cure, which he could not. He will ask you to inject him with the mixture and kill him.

If the Courier can pass a [Speech 75] check, they can convince Bishop to not take the serum

A [Medicine 60] check can convince Bishop to keep perfecting the serum and cure himself.

If the Courier tampered with the mixture and used healing power or any other healing substance besides Bleak Venom, Bishop gains 20% damage increase and +3 strength.

If the Courier gives Bishop the mixture and did not replace the venom with healing materials he will die.

Outcomes:

Bishop doesn’t take the chem and while he remains disheartened he says that he’ll keep trying to find a cure

Endings

All Endings, Bishop died: Bishop’s true identity and knowledge goes to the grave with him. He never

[thetapirsarehyperfixating]

TeLL ME ABOUT THE HA R T L E Y (ALSO WHEN U FIRST TALKED ABOUT THEM I THOUGHT THEY WERE NAMED HARLEY)

JASKJ;DAKJ;WE 1) VALID 2) OKAY

SO. hartley is a nb nerd who grew up mormon, with 2 other siblings and literally All of their cousins too. they mostly were raised by their mom and cousins, and when they moved out they had to deal with a lot of quietness and they weren’t used to that. theyre also canon adhd and their hyperfixation is dr whomstve

they ended up becoming immortal after a series of events left them in charge of a (sort of) spaceship and they were travelling and accidentally pissed off an organization of eldritch beings (its called IKEA. they have several locations around the universes). the IKEA was all for killing them for this offense, but one of them (Nys’tho) spoke up and was like “can we?? not???”. IKEA went for it anyways, but Nys’tho brought them back and accidentally made them immortal too. they’re only abt 100 when the story starts, but that’s relatively young for their lifespan ;0

the sort-of spaceship is technically more of a home that exists in a separate universe with a doorway that acts as a portal to anywhere they desire, but they find its a lot easier to say that its a spaceship. they modeled it partially after the classic whomstve console rooms bc its their hyperfixation and theyre gay

uhhh theyre just??  a good bean?? theyre doing their best to take care of the people around them and have fun in a universe which isnt always fun. they like hightops and vests. theyre also very good for cuddling and aroace. their hair is fluffy. i love them

#OOF I R AM B L E D BUT THATS GOOD I LOVE THEM #HARTLEY IS DOING THEIR FUCKING BEST OKAY #not dw #THANK YOU SM ROREE ILY #haven says words #haven rambles incoherently

[thegreyareabetween]

Texts I Send During Seminary

I consistently forget to post these here, but I’ve compiled them now because tbh, they really show a lot of what seminary is about. (Things in quotes are things said by teacher or students in seminary; asterisks mean I went on a long rant after)

- Cool so in seminary they’re saying that the reason the native Americans were forced out of their lands and beaten and tortured and subjected to the horrors the Europeans brought because it was god’s will.*

- “This is not about color” as god makes the bad guys in the Book of Mormon darker skinned and makes the good guys have light skin. Sure whatever just say Joseph Smith was racist and let’s move on*

- “Women need to be educated because they need to educate their children. Not because you want to make more money.” First of all, fuck you.*

- “When you feel like the church is wrong, you aren’t feeling that it’s wrong, you’re feeling what those people who oppose the church are saying is wrong.” What kinda bullshit logic are you trying to use?

- Oh boy do I just hate going to church and listening to the same lesson I’ve been hearing for 17 years

- Love when the church uses big numbers to make them seem better... Kay so they say they’ve donated $1.2 billion dollars over the last 30 years to charity. They’ve got 15 million members. If all those members paid tithing, that’s a lot of fucking money right? But the church only donated $80 per member to charity. When y’know, you’ve got members donating $18,000 per year. So really, are they really digging into their pockets for charity? If you divide that by the number of years, they’re donating $2.67 per member per year to charity. So like, that’s bullshit.*

- I bond with no one over being gay because I’m surrounded by STRAIGHT PEOPLE

- God we have a sub today in seminary and he’s being a bitch,

“No talking”

“Get off your phone.”

“Use your phone only for scriptures.”

“You have to talk to people.”

“I’m going to take your phone away.”

First of all I have anxiety so jot that down, Second of all, try to take away my phone, I fucking dare you. I will get up and leave, I’m done with this shit.*

- “The Nephites were in bondage.” First of all, that’s kinky. Second of all, please stop saying bondage so much it is making me

u n c o m f o r t a b l e

“In what way have you seen people in bondage today?”

S T O P

- Getting up early and dragging my ass to a religious institution that makes my whole existence a sin is not something I would call ideal. The sabbath is the lord’s day of rest therefore Jesus wants me to take this nap, mom.

- If there’s one thing I’ve learned from church, it’s that I hate kids and I will never have them. Other people? Fine have an army of children. Me? Not for both of my kidneys.

- So my seminary teacher is telling a story about an SBO at Bingham high school. The legislature said you can’t pray at high school graduation right? So this kid gets up at his graduation and prays anyways and my teacher is like, “And I’m so proud of him for standing up for what’s right.” Like wtf. Breaking the law and forcing your religious values on a captive audience seems wrong to me???

- Mormons trying to reconcile religion with science makes me feel not good.*

- “Now that gay marriage is legal, mormons may now be forced to perform gay marriages.” That’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works.

- "A successful woman isnt educated, or in a big career, or an owner of nice things- she's a mother." -My seminary teacher. Like I’m not trying to make motherhood seem unimportant, because it is important, but like... it’s just not for everyone.

- I don't know why but it bugs me when people brag like, "Well I'm related to Brigham young." The man had 50 wives, the real question is who isn't related to Brigham young in this state.

- My teacher is like- overtly racist and it meshes way to well with the doctrine in class

- "Would you go on a mission to a Polynesian island?" Idk man seems racist to me to ask that

- “Our church does really well in countries with dark skin." That's... that's not... where do I even begin to tell you how wrong that is. Bad bad word choice.

- "50% of people who walk into hotel rooms watch porn." First of all, I didn't even know the hotel had any porn options until now. Second, where did you get that statistic?

- "When you dress immodestly it's because you want attention and you don't really care about your body." That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works.

- "You'll get an STD if you have sex outside of marriage." I mean, if you're dumb and you're not careful you'll get an STD. You can get an STD even if you're married so lol

- "We turned on a PG-13 movie and within 10 minutes they had sworn like 30 times." At that point it's not PG-13 so you obviously weren't really looking at the rating

- My seminary teacher just said that Albert Einstein said that he believed in god. Which is like. So wrong. Albert Einstein said he was agnostic, and didn't believe in life after death. He said he wouldn't deny the possibility of a divine being but he wouldn't say there was one either 😒😒

- "Wow. The Book of Mormon and the Bible are so similar! They say the same kind of things about this other thing." Wow. It's like. It's like Joseph Smith had read the Bible because he grew up Christian. It's like. It's like he knew what the Bible said. Wow.

-"Anti-Mormon literature is so false, I would know because I'm the expert on the staff here about why it is false." Well first of all you have been so wrong so many times I find that extremely hard to believe

- "Fortnite is part of Satan's plan." Yeah I'm sure Satan wants to turn people from Jesus by playing fortnite.

- "My friends who swear have different thoughts." Wow, really? That's insane information.

- Everyone getting accepted to BYU and I'm here like, lol if I step on that campus I'm pretty sure alarms would go off and the campus and I would burst into flames.

- "It's on girls to dress modestly so boys don't do bad things." Maybe... maybe we should teach boys to control themselves.... And not teach girls it's their fault if boys make fucking dumb decisions...**

- So being gay is equal to murder in the eyes of the church in terms of transgressions. I hate living here*

- “You can’t be on your cellphone unless you’re on the gospel library.” Cool, try to take away my phone, see what happens. Like lol go ahead and call my mom. I don’t care anymore. I clearly have not cared since the day I started seminary. My mom will be pissed and probably take my phone away but really, y’all parade around free agency but it’ll just make you look bad if I get in trouble*

- “All of you on your phones are you with us?” Is that some sort of rhetorical question? Because I know you know I’m not paying attention and I don’t care to so why do you keep asking? Because if you’re looking to shame me into complying, jokes on you, I have no shame.

- Why must I, a simple gay, suffer like this

- If I had to choose between coming here and getting hit by a bus, you best damn be sure I’m choosing the bus

- Because of course that’s how you encourage people to go to church, yell at them so they feel so bad they have to go

- Like 90% of my problems wouldn’t be problems if church weren’t a thing

#exmormon #exmo #i do not like seminary at all #please release me from this hell #eternal suffering in the pits of hell would be preferable to seminary for me #omg seminary was my favorite class- says the girl who never left the state of utah (physically or mentally) #end me please

[itsalecsan]

October 3, 2018 basic training nearly ends in less than 24 hours... today was family day where all the soldiers get to see their loved ones for the first time in 10 weeks. everybody’s cellular devices were returned and it seemed like their expressions were beyond what they could understand as they observed cluelessly. I, too, fell victim of my own strange device, yet I didn’t hesitate to try and find a place that had wifi, something I had at least remembered about a smart phone. I was too eager to make a call, but I had realized I hadn’t eaten yet nor had my battle buddies. We stopped by Popeye’s and luckily it had wifi signal from the nearest Post Exchange. I didn’t pay no mind to the two of them, though I felt a little bad, but I had so many questions and wonders and feelings I wanted to let out... it’s been 10 weeks.... how have you been?... did u miss me?.... have u been thinking of me as much as I have of you?....  are u doing well?..... my joy and excitement gave me the butterflies, as if it was freshman year all over again..  I was hung up on and a million questions ran thru my mind..  the atmosphere had changed and the mood grew uncertain...  “I haven’t spoken to you for so long... u don't care to speak?” I thought to myself... “WHAT, you mean to tell me she hasn’t written a single letter to you bro?! I think she’s trying to tell u something dude.” Rev said as we conducted barracks maintenance. It’s only been 6 weeks and we were diving into our last phase of basic training. I hadn’t received any letters yet, though everybody else had gotten mail... I felt like I didn’t fit the part.. all I did was scan through the room for anyone else that hadn’t gotten mail...  “Na, it’s probably just the mailing system... people’s mails haven’t been sent through for a good period of time, remember?” I replied.  “Maybe college has gotten her booked..” I thought to myself..  “Alright man, whatever you say.” Rev responded as he continued sweeping the floor. I had an idea.. if she didn’t get my mail, there’s a mormon service that happens every Sunday and they give all newcomers a chance to write a letter that can be digitally scanned and sent to an email or phone number.. she’ll definitely be able to see my letter then... I became a mormon for the next 3 weeks.  I got in the car on our way back to the barracks... “I graduate tomorrow... haven’t you anything to say to me?..” I thought..  uncertainty became concerning...  what was going on?....   my phone then began to ring...  it was a call.

[steelmodashman]

I got tagged by @mo-the-vagabond​

Rules: Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, and when you are done tag up to 10 people and also tag the person who tagged you… And most importantly, have fun! A - Age: 22 in one month. Just telling people i’m 22 at this point. B - Biggest fear: Heights! Also have a terrible fear of fucking up. C - Current time: 7:11 PM. Hey, it’s like the gas station! D - Drink you last had: Water.  E - Every day starts with: Bathroom, followed by coffee.  F - Favorite song: They come and go! One song I've never gotten tired of is Piano Man by Billy Joel G - Ghosts, are they real: Yup. Leave them be and they won’t bother you. H - Hometown: A small town called Garland. Only one gas station.  I - In love with: Memes and Vidya games. Don’t have a partner atm.  J - Jealous of: Can’t really think of anything. I’m pretty content. K - Killed someone: I’ve killed people with kindness, does that count? I call it Anti-hate.  L - Last time you cried: Last time I really cried was when my mother, bless her heart, accidentally revealed I wasn’t a virgin at the dinner table with the family. Lots of judging that night. (She cried afterward, so that made me cry.) M - Middle name: Rodney. After my dad.  N - Number of siblings: Two brothers and one sister. O - One wish: For everything that I have planned in my life to work out the way I planned it. Don’t fuck it up, don’t fuck it up.  P - Person you last called/texted: Got a text from my roommate about an hour ago saying he won’t get home until tomorrow. Party! Q - Questions you’re always asked: “Are you Mormon?” “IT guy, can you replace my monitor? It’s not broken, I just want a nicer one.” S - Song last sang:  Piano Man played in the car yesterday on my way home. Belted that shit out!  T - Time you woke up: 8 AM I believe.  U- Underwear color: BLACK. :U V - Vacation destination: I would loooove to visit New Zealand one of these days. Go on a tour to see all of the places where they filmed Lord of the Rings. New Zealand is so beautiful. W - Worst habit: Letting my anxiety get the better of me and make me paranoid over dumb shit. X - X-rays you’ve had: All of them have been of my teeth. I have two fake teeth because I never grew any adult teeth there. Y - Your favorite food: Italian Everything! Z - Zodiac sign: Cancer. 

Can’t think of anyone else to tag! I suck!

[soybeantree]

*abc tag*

tagged by the lovely @justwhatevermark. thank you thank you. this is probably our first time doing something like this, but we’d love to do more. feel free to hit us up! 

rules: answer the questions and tag some cool people

a - age: bill clinton became president of the usa, at&t release video telephone for $1,499, and a shipping container filled with 28,000 rubber duckies was lost at sea. to this day, they’re still being found around the world. that’s right folks, the wonderful year 1992. 

b - biggest fear: [e] - the dark. i’m five, i know. [h] - snakes, they’re evil.

c - current time: 9:26 p.m.

d - drink you last had: [e] - currently drinking ~~**WaTeR**~~ [h] - Water as well because I’m healthy like that

e - ethnicity: [e] - american. (plus a bunch of other obnoxious european ancestries) [h] - american? french? german/czech (depends on where the borders were drawn that year? basically I’m white

f - favorite song: [e] - sorry. does not compute. i’m taking this to mean my current lady jam and in that case: oi (mx), q (got7), blood sweat and tears (bts), and barcelona (ed sheeran). [h] - Of all time? Doesn’t exist. Current favorites are Go Crazy!, 10 out of 10, My House (2PM), pretty much the entire MX Album. 

g - ghosts, are they real: [e] - regardless if i believe the thought of them freaks me out. and i’m pretty sure i’ve seen one before and just the darkness is not your friend no matter how much that song tries to convince you. [h] - i don’t know if i believe ghosts are real or not. i believe in spirits, does that count? 

h - hometown: [e] - the au natural state, usa [h] - The stars at night are big and bright 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻deep in the heart of Texas.

i - in love with: [e] - every type of dog known to man. OH AND CATs. cats are great too. also books and thunderstorms. if you meant biases check hereee. [h] - my bed. We’ve been in a committed relationship since I was born. If you want biases see Em’s link.

j - jealous of: [e] - everyone who could get a physical copy of clan 2.5 and fla:arrival. oh and also mark tuan who gets to touch jinyoung’s peach on the reg. oh,oh and park jinyoung who gets to see mark’s angel face on the reg. [h] - anyone who can sing or dance. I have no rhythm. Every piece of got7 and Monsta X’s clothing because they get to be all up on them. Lucky bastards.

k - killed someone: [e] - is this asking if we have? would that be okay to admit? no. but if you’ve ever driven in texas you’d be moved to do so. [h] - I grew up in Texas what do you think? *cocks shotgun* (The answer is no. I can’t even kill bugs. What did they do to deserve death?)

l - last time you cried: [e] - literally yesterday. it’s a day to day thing. give me a good book, slow country song, or a semi-sad commerical. i have a problem. [h] - It’s happened recently because give me a sentimental song and a half decent plot and the waterworks starts, but I can’t remember when.

m - middle name: [e] - sue. i’m southern y’all, though you probably wouldn’t know it. i was almost named after my grandmother - peggy sue. what a ride that would have been in middle school. [h] - Lee, spelled just like that. It’s my mom’s middle name as well. I was almost a junior, but my dad’s a junior, and he didn’t want that life for his kids.

n - number of siblings: [e] - one older brother [h] - Ten (Yes biological. No multiples. Not Mormon. Not Catholic. Top four questions I get when I tell people. PS I’m #7). 

o - one wish: [e] - world peace *waves to the crowd* *whispers* oh and mark tuan’s last name [h] - To be able to understand all languages. 

p - person you last called/texted: [e] - my mother. i’m cool. fight me. [h] - My younger brother. I wanted him to tell me the story about how he got mashed potatoes thrown in his face.

q - question(s) you’re always asked: [e] - it’s a tie between “do you have a job yet?” as most people assume if you have a master’s degree jobs immediately get thrown in your face when you graduate, and “are there any coupon’s out?” i work at a children’s store. round of applause for those people. the jeans are 7.99. just walk away if they are too much for you. [h] - When did you send the fax? Could you please re-fax it? I work with doctor’s offices, and yes, faxes are still a thing and yes, they’re horrible. 

r - reasons to smile: [e] - i live with my bffl (though she never uses that term), mark tuan smiling/laughing, jinyoung’s eye wrinkles, shin hoseok’s smile. i could go on, but imma stop. [h] - 2 sets of 7 idiots. They don’t even try, and they still make me smile.

s - song last played: [e] go higher - got7 [h] - Mayday - got7

t - time you woke up: [e] - 9 a.m. [h] - 7 a.m.

u - underwear colour: [e] - black [h] - Purple

v - vacation destination: [e] somewhere with snow [h] - Cold and Isolated.

w - worst habit: [e] - i…don’t..have..one…i don’t really have habits. [h] - I itch my ears. 

x - x-rays you’ve had: [e] - toomany; nose, chest, butt (see Hana’s), ankles, wrist. [h] - Chest, after Em and I fell off a horse. Yes, it was the same horse. Yes, we fell off it together (actually, I pulled Em off on my way down. I don’t remember much. I had a concussion.)

y - your favourite food: [e] - cheez its and peanut butter crackers [h] - CHEESE! Could eat it all day everyday. And noodles. 

z - zodiac sign: [e] - gemini [h] - Leo

we’re going to pass this on. fill it out if you so choose, if not, that’s coolio too. also if you’ve done it then feel free to continuee onnn. @dragonsfire @textingniall @mtunaa93 @markstunafish. 

#personal #answered #tagged #melissaaaa we have a bffl who's Filipino also Hana's brother in law is also Filipino #abc tag #unni Melissa

[gethealthy18-blog]

18 Books I Read In 2018

New Post has been published on http://healingawerness.com/news/18-books-i-read-in-2018/

18 Books I Read In 2018

I honestly never planned to write this post. In fact, I never even planned to read 18 books in 2018. As with most hobbies in life, when you love something you tend to do a lot of it. So here I am just a few weeks out from 2018 being done and I’ve already read 18 books!

I have always been a reader. I’m not a fast reader, but I read A LOT and I’m usually reading a couple books at once oftentimes on a variety of subjects. I tend to reach for fiction novels and memoirs but I don’t discount anything. If it’s intriguing or something I want to learn about, I’m reading it.

To be honest, I haven’t talked much about reading and just books in general here on THM but I have dabbled in it over the years. I used to be a part of a digital book club that I would share about on the blog once a month (anyone remember that?!). I even started the THM Book Club but after a few rounds and a lot of no-shows I decided it maybe wasn’t the best idea and/or maybe wasn’t the right time. So instead I thought I’d drop in and share some of the books I loved this year. If they can inspire you to read more or dive into a good book for the first time in a while, I’m happy! So with that here are 18 books I read in 2018.

FICTION

1. Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

This was actually the first book I read this year although technically I finished it on January 1st. It tells the story of a young woman from Nigeria who moves to America and her experience as an African woman navigating African American society….and so much more. Such a good read!

2. Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng

If you’re looking for a gripping fiction book with mystery but not quite Gillian Flynn terror (I’m looking at you Gone Girl…) this book is for you. Read it in a couple of days and honestly couldn’t put it down.

3. The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas

This should be on everybody’s reading list. It’s a YA novel but it applies to adults and teens alike. It tells the story of Starr Carter who witnesses her friend murdered by a police officer for no reason. It’s obviously poignant to our times and as a White American gave me a perspective I don’t see.

4. The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

An easy and light read but not total chick-lit. The name pretty much tells you the premise of the book, though the story does not disappoint and takes many unexpected turns.

5. The Immortalists by Chloe Benjamin

Finished this recently and it was a great fiction novel about how 4 siblings lives can take 4 totally different directions. As one of four, I can relate to this but it was also just a solid story that was easy to follow along.

6. Call Me by Your Name by Andre Aciman

I’ll be honest, not my favorite book. Some people loved it, but I found it slowwwwww. I was relieved when it was done. I’m told I might like the movie though so I’m adding it to my watchlist.

7. Rich People Problems by Kevin Kwan

This is the third of the Crazy Rich Asians series. I technically started it in 2017 but finished it in January so it counts! If you want a REALLY easy read which requires little to no brain capacity, this series is for you.

NON-FICTION/MEMOIRS

8. Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover

Probably my favorite book of the year. I love a good memoir and this one was hard to put down. It is the story of Tara who grew up in a mormon survivalist family in Idaho. It is gripping, moving, heartbreaking and full of redemption. Highly recommend!

9. Season of the Witch by David Talbot

It’s hard to categorize this book as 100% historically accurate but it also isn’t quite historical fiction. It tells the story of San Francisco from the early 1060s through the early 1980s and the figures who shaped it. If you live in the Bay Area and want to learn more about it, this one is for you.

10. Empty Mansions: The Mysterious Life of Huguette Clark by Paul Clark Newell Jr.

I’ll be honest, I bought this on a whim late one night in Minnesota. I had just finished another book and was looking for something to read when this popped up on my Amazon recommended list. It was actually quite fascinating. It tells the story of Huguette Clark, the heiress of a mining fortune and the story of her life over the past 100 years.

11. What Made Maddy Run by Kate Fagan

The only book I read this year that is not on kindle because my friend Kait Hurley sent it to me. I couldn’t put it down and read it in two days. For anyone who struggled in college and lives with perfectionism, this book is a must-read!

12. I’ll be There For You by Kelsey Miller

This is Kelsey Miller’s latest book and a total departure from her previous one. I LOVED it. It tells the story of everyone’s favorite 90s show, Friends, and the cultural implications of it. If you’re a friends-lover, or even if you aren’t this is a great read.

SELF-DEVELOPMENT/EDUCATIONAL

13. You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero

I actually re-read this book this year. I read it a few years ago but thought it would be a good refresher and a great book to kickoff the THM Book Club (RIP) so I read it again. It’s always a great kick in the butt if you’ve been telling yourself all kinds of stories that no longer serve you.

14. The ONE Thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan

THM book club #2…and maybe the book that killed it lol. This is a great read if you’re looking to help hone in on your interests and prioritize how to spend your time. I’ll be honest, I didn’t find all the advice in it to be practical in reality but I did learn a thing or two from the authors.

15. The Untethered Soul by Michael A Singer

Another re-read. I turn to this book whenever I need it and I needed it a lot this year. If you’re looking for a book that aligning and helps you to disassociate from your thoughts in a positive way, this book is for you.

16. The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Sri Swami Satchidananda 

We technically had to read this for yoga teacher training and while I’m not sure it would have made it onto my list before, I’m so happy it is now. TBH I don’t know how it would be reading this without the guidance of a yoga instructor, but each sutra definitely leaves you with plenty of thoughts and sage wisdom whether you’re a practicing yogi or not. We also had to read The Living Gita but figured I wouldn’t take up two of the books from my list with YTT mandatory reading 😉

17. Chakra Healing: A Beginners Guide by Margarita Alcantara

This book was not my initial choice when it came to learning more about chakras but the book recommended to me wasn’t available on kindle so I ended up with this one. It did feel somewhat repetitive at times, but when it comes to learning more about chakras and the holistic ways to support them (yoga, essential oils, meditation etc..) this is a great intro guide.

18. Medical Medium by Anthony William

I’ll be honest, I avoided this book for a long time because the skeptic in me just didn’t want to give in to the trend. For reference: Medical Medium is about Anthony William, a medium who channels the word of god when it comes to western medicine. Is it as over the top as it seems? Yes. I don’t feel it should be taken at face value, nor do I think celery juice is the answer to all of your problems BUT I did find it interesting and thought the same of the information on herbal supplements was useful. I incorporated some of his suggestions when I got shingles…I still took my antivirals but it certainly didn’t hurt to have a few extra supplements for support.

I’ll be honest, I did read a few other random books about everything from essential oils to tarot, but I figured 18 would be a good (and lucky!) number to end at. Definitely let me know if you enjoy learning about what I’m reading and if that’s something I should continue to incorporate into The Healthy Maven next year.

What was your favorite book this year? Feel free to drop recommendations below for what I should read in 2019!

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[automatismoateo]

If I Were Born A... (modified) via /r/atheism

Submitted October 22, 2018 at 09:06AM by SmeagolSandwich (Via reddit https://ift.tt/2CwHwlD) If I Were Born A... (modified)

This is u/MagusSanguis' poem. He is not me. It was uploaded here yesterday under the title "If I Were Born A..." and it really struck a chord with me, so I've modified it (also added, deleted, and more substantially changed a few lines, like L. Ron Hubbard crying at the success of Scientology?) to have a roughly consistent iambic heptameter. Again, all credit to u/MagusSanguis, I just hated to see a good idea well written but without the consistent rhythm.

If I were born a Muslim, there would only be one God.

Allah would be his name, Muhammad carrying his Rod.

I'd say salaam to greet my fellows, be they near or far,

Or raise my sword, a banner, and scream Allahu akbar!

Then seventy-two virgins would I gain for my Jihad.

What's the cost? Dead infidels? Who cares? It’s for my God!

If I were born a Catholic, for my sins I’d have to grieve, but at least

Mass is just important Eastertime and Christmas Eve.

I'd buy indulgences when I wanted to be free,

Of sin and filth and all the other things weighed down on me.

But I kid, you must know that those times have long since ceased.

The pope has changed his mind—seems all we needed was a priest!

Mary’d be my mother, and along with all the Saints,

They’d intermediate for me, and I’d have no complaints.

If I were born evangelist, "I know I'm saved" I'd say. For all who know the real Christ can return with him someday.

If everyone just knew my truth, then things would turn out well.

If you don't, it's no big deal... You'll only burn in hell.

For I’ve been taught exactly just how good this world could be

If only everyone could just think, act, and look like me.

If I were born Jehovah’s pious Witness to this Earth

I’d be extra sure to not give any house its private berth.

Within my small community I’d prove that I’m devout

Should I die of a disease with a vaccine that’s long been out.

Never mind predictions of a doom not come to pass—

They were spiritual in nature. I’m not talking out my ass.

Those prophecies were given to us merely as a test.

If you don't believe me, I'll just shun you like the rest.

If I were born a Mormon, heaven's streets would shine with gold.

I'd have a living prophet just like in the times of old.

He'd tell me what I need to do to live once more with God:

Abstain from tea and coffee. (I know it may sound odd).

I'd know exactly how I could obtain eternal life:

I’d have courage like the prophets, and of course more than one wife

Follow in the prophet’s footsteps, for it’s he knows best the way,

You'll be severed from your family if you choose not to obey.

If I were born a Scientologist my faith would be

As ancient and as necessary as could ever be.

Despite what you may think, giving the published date a look,

No thought is more ancient than’s contained inside this book.

L. Ron H. himself would laugh and probably would gloat,

If he knew his cashgrab novels to this day sustained a cult.

Don't ever try to leave, there's nothing good outside our walls.

It's us against the world, until the world around us falls.

If I were born a pagan I could choose the gods I like,

That fit my wants and feel the best and suit my needs just right!

Apollo guides me by the day, Inanna through the night.

They'd give me wisdom, strength, and truth—at least I hope they might…

Believing in a weak god would be making a mistake.

Someone else's vengeful god could burn me at the stake.

I'd do my best to worship and appease the volatile

But there’s too many to keep track of, and I’m no theophile.

If I were born a member of the cult of Jimmy Jones,

I'd know the man to follow to protect me from my woes

A communist utopia, never seen before,

And beautiful ol’ Jonestown where we’ll live life evermore.

Never question Jimmy's teachings, let devotion never fade

Then I'd take part in translation from this world via Kool-Aid.

If I were a doubter it'd be the hardest road to take.

I'd be told to keep a lie for other people’s sake.

If I were to question what they take as given premise,

They’d ostracize me, sure, but never question what could cause this.

So I'd hide it deep inside and smile, keeping calmly dormant,

The contradictions I now see giving my mind to torment.

If anyone else ever feels the same way I won’t know.

We’ll all suffer alone as we all put on the same show.

But I was born to parents who, as luck would have it, knew

Exactly what my mold should be, and in that mold I grew.

I was taught from birth the path to take and what to do.

Conform to what I'm told, because what I was told is true.

I've never questioned what they taught, nor challenged what they say...

I'd make them sad and make God mad—don't question, just obey!

If anything feels out of place or doesn't feel quite right

It's Satan tempting me to give up the eternal fight.

It's not an issue with the faith chosen for me by birth,

’Cause I was told since I was one it’s all that’s true on earth!

I doubt my doubts, I memorize rebuttals for debating,

Then spit them up and strut away, my own faith validating.

I've come to a conviction and it's fairly plain to see:

The one who holds the truth of all is obviously me.

#reddit