smalltalktorture

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cried for hours yesterday about panic. spending an inordinate amount of time blocking people i thought were cool for their shit jokes and comments to me. pretty much thinking of deleting this blog and making another one that’s out of bandom entirely. it’s so fucking awful here.

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how to trick writers into giving you more fanfic to read

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I’m so emotional about the way that the band is mentioning/including Joe in things like the new music video while he can’t be physically there as he works to take care of his mental health.

The way that he’s part of the story Pete tells his granddaughter in the video, his name is said, and he has a physical presence/place in the video even when he couldn’t be there to shoot.

Because, from my experience (which I know is only one person’s but I also know my experiences with mental illness are not mine alone), when you’re struggling with your mental health and especially when it’s Bad, it can feel like the world and especially your loved ones are all going on living without you.

You can feel yourself fading from group photos and memories. 

But Fall Out Boy, as they always have with each other, are making sure that Joe is still present in their group and in the work even after the album they produced was recorded while he’s away. 

Because those of us who are mentally ill have people who love us and think of us when we can’t be there. And who tell stories about us and include us in spirit. 

I hope Joe is able to get the help he needs and feel better and I can’t wait for the day we see him with the band again. Because it’ll be when he’s ready and doing well enough to.

For now, I have so much love for the man a wizard turned into a raccoon.

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Dear AO3 readers please know that if I do not reply to your comment it is because I am laying it on the ground and rolling in it like a cat in a flower bed

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#writing

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ummmm maybe if you boycott love and detox just to retox you'll feel better

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#how many porn bots must i BLOCK #LEAVE ME ALONE

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THEYRE SO CUTE @ginandkeroscene

✨ new jellycat Lovely Lovebirds 🦜

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that’s enough emotions for a whole year. ciao

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#i just cleaned off a third of the surfaces

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i’m just tired. i’m tired of just having to fight to make it through. i kind just want to quit existing.

#negativity mention #this post brought to you by the fact that i have to stay at work because i have no sick time and can’t afford unpaid time #i can’t afford this job tbh #but there’s nothing else #so i muddle through #getting crippling migraines every time rent is due cause i barely make it #and now i’m sick and i have to stay at work when i just want to go to sleep and i’m crying at my desk because i don’t feel well #i’m so tired of this #i’m not gonna do it #but it’s so tempting #i’ll just be here until my body gives out #and then some

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People who switch pronouns in songs to no-homo the situation are so funny. The idea literally never even occurred to me as a kid. Couldn’t be me. I am a woman scorned. I am a man who had his heart broken. I am a guy who hates his hometown. I’m a country boy, I’m a city girl. I’m a slut. I’m addicted to cocaine. It’s a song, man.

#i did and do the opposite #i yes homo it #i homo it up #make it homo #taylor swift’s you belong with me is lesbian now

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i think that, in retrospect, the nsfw ban in fact increased the baseline amount of horny on this website

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are you eating poisons? deadly poisons? and youe didnt share? can i have some of your poisons. Can i have some of your deadly poisons