#Bro is like 20-30 years apart

[iloveacronix]

Well there goes Futureshipping💀

#Bro is like 20-30 years apart #Age gap is crazy #Crying bc I thought Borg was at least in his early 40s or smth💔 #Ninjago cyrus borg #Ninjago futureshipping #Damn #Anyway #Acronix x me canon???/jjj #Ninjago acronix #*MY* MAN #Gotta focus on a different Nix and Borg ship #We gotta move to Krux x Cyrus now/JJJJ #THIS WAS NOT MEANT TO START ARGUMENTS #ACRONIX AND CYRUS CAN DATE WHOEVER THEY WANT #DONT ATTACK ME

[roosterm3attrash]

101 ways to kill Barney Calhoun

I ended up making this list by going through multiple servers and people so here cuz I found it in my phone notes

Anyway the brilliant minds of the half-life fandom

1.) Waited pressure plate with tnt under it

2.) im going to leave mines under his mattress

3.) i’m setting a rake on his floor so he steps on it and whacks his face

4.) I'm giving him a bomb disguised as a cigar

5.) barney death 3: he ate what elvis presley ate….

6.) I would kill Barney Calhoun by slapping him so hard on the ass that it gives him cardiac arrest

7.) I drop him onto a pit of venomous snakes

8.) Im going to give Barney a beer but instead of beer it will be filled with deadly neurotoxin

9.) “now gordon, ive been keepin an eye out on this combine hideout for a while. they seem to walk in a certain pattern when crossing over to the entrance, which makes me think theyve buried mines all over the place. now, ive memorized the pattern, so im just gonna sneak on over, and you follow my lead, alright? dont worry, i know exactly where all the mines are.” and then he explodes

10.) that one episode of sponge bob where he eats the exploding pie and explodes

11.) set up tripwire then he falls into a tiger pit

12.) I type kill npc_barney into console

13.) slap the boobies off his chest so hard them fly around the world and hit the side of his head like water balloons

14.) i could marry him and slowly feed him mercury over a span for 3 years until he dies of mercury poisoning

15.) He tries to become a wwe wrestler but gets killed in a freak accident mid match

16.) I would kill him by making him a pizza but it’s covered in big chunks of lead but it’s hidden in the sauce and it’s a Chicago style pizza

17.) bring him to a highway and kiss him so hard he gets knocked onto the road and gets ran over

18.) Peeling him apart by the dna strand and eating it like spaghetti

19.) barney gets trampled by a stampede of horses

20.) giving him under the counter off brand viagra

21.) put him in a washing machine and turn it on

22.) shark attack

23.) pit of sharks

24.) barney gets criticized so badly he dies

25.) barney sits in an uncomfortable chair for too long

26.) He gets his arm caught in a bear trap w a beer used as a lure

27.) HE BECOMES THE CAT THAT TRAUMATIZED HIM. HE….YKNOW…..

28.) he gets stuck in a swimming pool like hes in the sims and dies from getting exhausted and drowning

29.) barney roasting marshmallows but his stick ignites into flames and he burns to death

30.) ATTACH SO MANY BALLOONS TO BARNEY HE FLOATS AWAY INTO THE SKY NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN

31.) barney gets rejected by gordon and he gets so sad his body shuts down

32.) I kiss him so tenderly on the lips that he melts into a puddle and dies

33.) i throw him in to a volcano so that he melt into a puddle and dies

34.) "I’ll turn him into a flea, a harmless, little flea, and then I’ll put that flea in a box, and then I’ll put that box inside of another box, and then I’ll mail that box to myself, and when it arrives…I’ll smash it with a hammer!"

35.) stick a bottle of beer into his throat, the whole bottle

36.) give Barney Calhoun a beer can full of poison

37.) hang a piano over the toilet and wait

38.) i think barney should have his spine ripped out through his mouth

39.) he goes to a bar and tries flirting with the bartender and the bartender takes out a shotgun and kills him on the spot

40.) punch him so hard in the penis that he shatters like a brittle glass

41.) bite him in half

42.) I'm grinding him in a giant shredder

43.) bro took a bath in hot mac 'n cheese

44.) i put him ina giant caldron full of water and i begin boiling him down to gelatin and broth

45.) barney accompanies the crew to the borealis and he steps over thin ice and gets dunked into the below zero water and freezes to death

46.) barney calhoun gets carried away by a tornado

47.) took barney on a vacation to Hawai’i and pushed him into a volcano

48.) He dies and he's never mentioned again and nobody cares

49.) died of tummy ache

50.) Stepped on by a strider

51.) shrinked until he disappeared completely

52.) blasted into the sun

53.) Stab him with 300 pencils made with real lead

54.) slip and falls and dies

55.) put him into a Minecraft furnace

56.) Barney ignores the wet floor sign and slips and cracks his head

57.) while swimming in the swimming pool he swims to fast and smashes his face against the pool's wall

58.) he gets a concussion and drowns

59.) i want to put him through a lunchmeat slicer

60.) He falls off a dumb huge cliff

61.) he lives his life to the fullest and at his deathbed at age 93, June 29th, 6:12 am he passes away

62.) he eats a burgie with too much grease and gets a heart attack

63.) testicular cancer

64.) He should get sucked into a fan while trying to fix it at Black Mesa and literally no one comes looking for him

65.) The Pita Bread Room

66.) slipped on a Banana peel

67.) ran over by a crap ton of shopping carts rolling down the hill

68.) barney overheats in a fursuit

69.) he has sex so bad that he dies

70.) Barney dies because i fucking kill him with a shovel 🖕

71.) barney eats the gas station sushi

72.) barney faints via twirling around and holding his hand in front of his forehead, and then slowly lying down with a flower in his hands to indicate death

73.) When they turn off the suppression fields he just blows up

74.) barney gets crushed by a giant boulder thats all i got son

75.) barney goes to the beach that makes you old

76.) His head spontaneously combusts and pops like corn

77.) erectile dysfunction

78.) we should also have him get carbon monoxide poisoning

79.) barney gets gaussian blurred into nothingness

80.) he eats 20 year old expired mcdonalds burger and contracts the worst case of food poisoning youve ever seen

81.) Have we done tying him to a train track like a damsel

82.) he dies in a glue trap

83.) barney develops lactose intolerance over the years of combine occupation and he drink milk and then dies from shitting hinself to death

84.) he should chocke on his favourite food

85.) barney gets lead poisoning from a 1990s garfield glass mug

86.) he chokes on plastic

87.) barney gets thrown throw a glass window from a 15 story building

88.) gordon gives barney a wedgie so bad that he splits in half and dies

89.) gordon and barney divorce and barney dies from heartbreak

90.) alyx and gordon have enough of barney’s snoring so they smother him in his sleep with a pillow

91.) he trips while walking with gordon and impales himself on gordons crowbar face

92.) if he were the size of an ant he'd be ok instead he blows up like a watermelon and his remains are fed to lamarr by a very delighted kleiner. he fucking hated barney

93.) dog roughhouses with barney and accidentally obliterates his spinal cord

94.) barney gets poisoned to death by his own chumtoad

95.) coats him in eggs and flour and fries him

96.) snatched by a hawk and eten alive

97.) barney gets to participate in a danganronpa killing game and gets executed

98.) barney opens the love-letter-for-you.txt.vbs file and it kills him

99.) elaborate rube goldberg machine to drop an anvil on barney

100.) barney dies in an Iron Maiden

101.) we should put barney under those old timey stone tablets meant to squish and torture people and make them talk

#half life #barney calhoun #half life 2 #hl

[brains4brawn]

Journalled

It was a small thing, tucked away in the corner of the thrift shop. Victor had pulled it out, but the book was locked and bound in gold and wouldn't open. His mind piqued, Victor bought the book and took it home. Over the next week He tried everything to undo the clasp but nothing worked. When he had just lost hope a tiny but audible Click could be heard, Victor rushed back to find the clasp undone and the bindings slightly ajar.

Victor carefully opened the ancient tome only to find that the pages were stuck. it was like they had been glued! Only the last page remained free. Written towards the top if fancy handwriting

"Write it down so i can enact Be-warned Though, What is written I can not retract!"

Under neath that was 5 evenly spaced lines. and another message at the bottom,

"I only remain open for this 1 day Until 5 complete Earth circle's will I open again"

Looking at the the 3 blank lines, And thinking this must be a joke he wrote

I will graduate from college

My older brother will never pick on me again

Over the next 20 years I will gain 150lbs

As Victor finished the book slammed shut and relocked itself. Scared Victor threw the book into his closet and ran down stairs.

That night his family recieved word that Victor's older brother was in a bad car crash. He was alive but in the ICU and had lost his legs. Certainly the taller brother would never pick on the shorter Victor again.

The crash had been the fault of the manufacturer so the family received and huge settlement. This money paid for Victor's choice of college.

Two years later, when Victor was home from college for the summer and his mother commented that he was finally starting to get bigger.

The 20 Year old checked the scale and sure enough he weighed 140, 15lbs heaver then when he was 18. Victor knew it had to be the book.

Victor: 22, 155lbs

The College graduate was now 23 and moving all of his stuff from his half of the bedroom to his first apartment when he stumbled across the book. Looking at the date on the wall Victor realized it was exactly 5 years since he had last seen the cursed object. As if it had a mind of its own the book opened to the last page, now with three new empty lines waiting to be filled.

Victor hesitated, he had imagined for the last 5 years what he'd do if he had this chance again. He could fix everything!

My older brother James develops a prosthesis so he can walk and run again.

My younger sisters will grow into smart talented women who will want for nothing.

Looking at his tiny 15 year old brother Bastion asleep on the bed Victor writes:

Bastion will grow up to be the popular jock just like his older brother.

Satisfied, the book shuts itself and prepares to grant Victor's wish.

Victor 24, 170lbs

For the most part the Wishes went like Victor planned. Well except for Bastion's. In the proceeding months after writing those words Victor found himself becoming more popular and Jock-like. Words like Bro or Bruh, dude, man, had taken over. He joined a gym and from there joined some local sports teams. When he wasn't busy at work or working out Victor could be found screwing every chick he could find. No girl was immune to his baby faced charms and his Gym sculpted body.

Victor 26 185lbs

Victor 28 200lbs

Victor practically lives in the Gym now. His gains speak for themselves his body is a temple and he loves for chicks to worship him. His younger sisters call him a man whore, while Bastion is turning out just like him.

His girlfriend of 6 months broke up with him cause she caught him in bed with her mother.

Looking in his closet he stumbles over the Book, open and waiting for him to write something down.

In his jealousy of those gay guys who can sleep with anyone he wrote:

I'm like 100% gay, no chicks only dicks.

I wont get any STD's from sex.

Sex with me will change anyone's life.

Again the book closes and gets to work.

Victor 30, 215lbs

Vic the dick had been out for 2 years now, the book took the man whore and turned him into a man slut. Everyone wanted a piece of him and at least Vic was smart enough to charge them for his services. Every option on the table is open he'd do any guy and make them feel like his number1. Every guy he slept with changed, most upped their stamina but some hunked out into gay sluts just like Vic.

Hell even Bastion had come out and if the rumors are true he's slept with every guy at his college.

Vic 32 230lbs

Vic was becoming something of a local celebrity in the gay community. His looks had caught the eye of a movie producer and now he was staring in low budget action movies as the gay savior. He had been so busy that he wasn't home for his 33rd birthday. Some how the book found him on location in the bottom of his travel bag.

Vic watched as it opened up to the last page with 3 empty spaces.

He took his time and pondered over what he should write.

I want to find true love

I want to be content

I want to be smart again

The book seemed to close with a sigh. None of these were worth the trouble of granting. But a deal is a deal.

Vic 34, 245lbs

Vic, 38, 275lbs

Finally after 20 years, Vic had stopped growing. Life had settled down for the Gay icon, nowadays, he owned a successful chain of LGBTQIA Gyms that catered towards the community needs. He organized Pride events and helped with protests when needed. He looked at the open book on his desk. It was tempting but Vic no longer wanted to change anything about his life. Even though he had never found a lifelong partner.

He decided he had held on to the magic for to long, so he summoned his newest intern Jack and gave the book to him then let him leave so he could explore this newest acquisition.

*bright flash of Light*

The intercom beeps and Vic pushes the button.

"Sir your husband just arrived to collect you. He wants to remind you that you still have to pick up the kids and get changed for tonights ceremony"

Before he could even answer the door burst open and Vic's husband of 7 years strolled in. Vic was already out of his chair and giving Jack a pec on the cheek while grabbing his toned ass.

On his way out Vic glanced at the family photo on his desk and gave a silent thanks to the book.

#age progression #reality change #male transformation #male muscle growth #tf #nerdtojock #personality change #straight to gay

[billthedrake]

TRAINING THE SALES GUY (PART TWO)

Note: this series will have some edgier content.

I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I'd had sex with my coworker. And not just any coworker. Carson Fucking Wells. Straight bro who apparently had a thing for sucking dick. My dick included. He wasn't my direct report, at least, but still...

I spent the next week after our sales visit, I was waiting for a visit from HR. In my more dramatic, worried mind, I imagined being told to leave immediately and they'd send me my personal stuff later.

But pretty quickly, I realized Wells wasn't gonna blab. He didn't want word getting out about this either. He had even more reason to keep it private, and once the fear and fog cleared from my brain, I realized he was keeping more distance from me at the office. No more stopping into my office to shoot the breeze, no more "Boss" nickname. I was Bill again.

I was glad, really. I'd had a hot, very hot no-strings experience with a kind of hetero dude and was able to relive those memories now. I even thought about Carson during my next hookup BJ. 30 year old jocky gay guy from Grindr. Not a dead ringer or anything, but I closed my eyes while the Grindr cocksucker deep throated me and let myself be transported back to that Denver Marriott. I even grabbed Grindr guy's head like I did Carson's and start thrusting.

"You should give a guy some warning," he said when he finally came up from air, admiringly stroking my dong. "You got a big fucking dick."

"Sorry man," I apologized, stroking his dark brown hair. I kind of wished his hair coloring matched Carson's more, which was kind of fucked up. This guy was way cure and way hot. "You got a great mouth."

The flattery worked for him. "OK if I just milk that load out of you?" he asked.

I knew he'd do a good job, so I nodded. "More than OK. Have at it..."

I was out of the Carson Wells headspace, and I began to enjoy this blowjob for what it was. Some guys on Grindr overpromise their oral skills. This guy wasn't one of the bullshitters. He knew how to go gradual to work up a big of steam, then really go wild and deep on my dong to make me blast. It was awesome.

In our DMs we'd established a no-recip vibe, and indeed I didn't offer to get him off. But I did thank him and praise his ability. It was may be a one off but we both said we'd hit each other up sometime.

***

A man can go through phases. In my 20s I tried it all. Well, not every perverted kinky thing under the sun, but when it came to regular vanilla sex, I sucked, got sucked, fucked, got fucked. I tried rimming and frot, though those didn't appeal to me as much. By my 30s, I realized I was much more into topping than bottoming. It was half physical, since bottoming didn't feel fun or pleasurable to me like it did to a lot of guys. But it was that feel of being in control, of doing the penetrating, that got me going. And with the coming of online hookup sites and eventually the apps, I found identifying as a top attracted total bottoms. I thought I'd miss the vers side. Turns out, I didn't.

My 40s were about being in a relationship. Not a six month thing, or a two year thing, but marriage. I was still processing what had gone wrong with me and Rob. Maybe we fucked up a good thing, or maybe we never should have been together so long. The sex was great, but not perfect. But we'd drifted apart in emotional ways, which was tough.

Maybe that's why I was getting into the no-strings thing so much. Not being a man whore or anything, but once or twice a month, I found a guy to service me. And truth, be told the temptation was getting stronger. Grindr and Scruff had some dedicated cocksuckers, and I had the kind of dick those guys often went for.

Maybe that's why I was scrolling through the apps for the second time in a week. Work had been getting me stressed, and maybe seeing Carson had my mind wandering all afternoon. Hell, there were a number of the other younger bros I wouldn't mind sucking my dick either...

"NO GAG REFLEX" came the boast of one. I took this guy's profile with a grain of salt. Like I said, there were a lot of bullshitters on Grindr. But if he was offering...

"Hi man," I messaged. "Fucking hot profile." I was massaging the cock in my sweats. Maybe a quiet evening in wasn't gonna be so quiet.

Up till that point I'd met two men I could really let loose with orally. Rob gave pretty head, but he wasn't one of the. One was a trick who deep throated me greedily, kind of choking/gagging on my cock, but in a hungry pig kind of way. It was before all the porn videos of that kind of thing ant it seemed crazy and nasty and hot. The other was a guy I went out with for a few month, Steve. He was really into servicing me, and was very open to having his face fucked. So we did that, a lot. He wouldn't do anal, and I think I ended up calling things off with him for that reason.

Like I say, men go through phases. Now I thought of Steve as the one who got away.

I told No-gag-reflex guy about that now. About my ex-boyfriend who used to do that and how I missed it.

He boasted how he could really hand some rough throat treatment. "I'll make you forget that ex," came the reply.

Maybe he thought I was referring to someone more recent and that I was still carrying a torch. It was a hot thing to say though.

"Hell yes," I typed back.

"My place or yours?" he asked.

"Either works," I wrote. I looked down at my sweatpants and beat up T-shirt. I didn't feel like going out. "But how bout mine?" I sent him my address.

"Cool," he said. "Can be there in twenty." Then "You might wanna have a towel handy. I've not had any accidents in years, but you're a big boy."

He was probably laying it on thick. I mean, I'm hung big but not like fucking Rocco Steele or anything. Still, I got an old towel and set it out for the ready.

Turns out No Gag didn't need the towel. The dude was a pro. I'll admit he wasn't my normal type physically, but I was glad I'd gone beyond my normal type. He had a fun, horny energy as he walked in and practically begged for me to whip it out.

I did.

"Fuuuuckk..." he hissed as he reached down to slowly stroke up the length. "I'm gonna love have this fucker buried down my throat." No Gag had a way of making me feel like a porn king, and I was loving. He looked up with a flirty. "Where ya wanna do this?" he asked.

I tilted my head to direct him into the living room, where two towels were set out. One folded for his knees, the other... well...

He knelt down as I peeled down my sweats. And then he was on me. Nice, hungry sword-swallowing act. He was skilled all right, but part of me was still a little nervous going wild, since I didn't really know the guy and never had done anything before him. I did have one bad Grindr experience with a dude who swore he could deep throat me. He most decidedly could not.

"I'm going in, man," I announced. "Just tap my leg if it gets to be too much."

He mumbled around my cock in a way that communicated he didn't plan on tapping anything. So I held on to his skull and started riding. I didn't go hard at first but I gave myself some deep, slow, and steady throat action. Working in deeper... deeper... till my my nuts pressed against his chin.

"Holy fuck," I gasped. This felt awesome, amazing in a way I'd forgotten a tight throat could feel. No Gag really didn't seem to have any reflex kicking in. "Hold another second?" I asked, my cock buried deep. He didn't answer, but he didn't tap out. He just held himself calm and still and nursed my dick with his throat. I honestly I think I pulled out just so I wouldn't cum.

No Gag let out a sound that was a combo of groan and deep intake of air. "Ugh... fuck that's hot," he said.

I held my dick up, rigid and very wet. "Think we can go for some of the stuff we talked about?" I asked. In our chat, No Gag had messaged some specific things his oral tops often enjoyed doing.

"Go for it," he growled.

I nodded, then pushed back in. I gave him a second with my cock buried full in him, then I held his skull and just fucking. Not slow this time, I just pumped his mouth and throat like a fleshjack, getting off on the clutching wetness on my thrusting cock and the slick suction noises. I slowed down just a little and compensated for harder thrusts.

Turns out he did have a gag reflex after all. Nothing bad happened, but the sucker gagged around my cock a half second, then swallowed around me while I stopped. I pulled out and saw the thicker mucus on my dong. I was turned on as fuck.

"Slower?" I asked.

He had a determined look. "At first. Then you can go hard again."

I slid my hardon back between his spit wet lips and now felt the drool wet my ball sac with each inward thrust. I tried to maintain something between the fast and the hard rhythms as I pumped his face and looked down in disbelief at the man's feat in taking me. And wouldn't you know? I thought of Carson Wells and that fucking did it. My hips gave a hard jab and caused more gagging sounds. I was already cumming though, and thankfully, the sucker knew how to take me, and let me ride out my O. I relaxed and let go of my grip on his head.

Tears were streaming down his cheek when he finally pulled off, but he looked happy as a clam. "You were horny," he observed.

I looked down and patted him playfully on the cheek as way of thanks. "You made me horny... goddamn, that was incredible."

He stood up, spit on the top part of his sweatshirt, but otherwise not looking worse for the wear. I had an extra towel and handed it to him to wipe off.

"You do that a lot," he observed as he set the towel down.

I shook my head. "I haven't in years. Thanks for reminding me how much I love it."

No gag grinned. "Pleasure was mine, man. Some guys... well, they can go too hard or too easy. You were just right. "

"Any chance we could do this again?" I asked.

I was expecting a noncommittal Grindr sure-maybe response but No Gag shook his head. "Nah, man. My husband gives me a hall pass, but not for repeats?"

"Well thanks for using your hall pass on me," I replied. "Seriously, I'm gonna think about that for a while."

***

At first I thought Carson Wells had major misgivings about sucking my dick. It turns out he just didn't want anyone suspecting.

"Hey Boss," he said as we rode the elevator down one Friday afternoon. If you're familiar with the financial district in summer, you know it clears out each Friday midday. Carson and I were the dumb saps working the full day.

I was caught off guard by the return of the nickname, but welcomed that Carson and I were on friendly terms again. "Hey Wells, I thought you'd be hitting the links by now."

He shot me his goofy frat-boy smile that worked a little too well on me. "I wish, man. I have a big camping trip with my buddies in a couple weeks, and can't really the half day now."

"Well, I guess it's good to put in some face time," I replied. "With Cal in and all." Calvin was the Senior VP and divided his time between the major locations of our firm.

Carson smirked, like he was pleased to hear me be cynical about corporate politics. "I like this side of you, Boss," he said.

The elevator dinged at the ground floor. At least I could make a getaway. But Carson leaned in before the doors opened. "You've gotten head lately, haven't you?"

I blushed, which made the dude laugh. The doors open and we strutted our way through the lobby and out on to the street.

Carson pulled out his phone to get an Uber. I was going to do the same but he looked up and shot me an impish look. "You think maybe you can get my weekend started off right?" he asked.

I knew what he was asking. God, he was hot in his business casual. Golf shirt polo that stretched over his gym-built muscle, lightweight wool slacks, and tan dress shoes. He knew he looked hot, too, the perfect bait for a gay dude like me.

"Come on, Bill," he urged, his voice a little softed. "No fucking strings.. it'll be fun."

"Yeah," I agreed. Blushing as I did but feeling a surged of horniness that was already making me chub up in my own trousers.

It was weird as hell going to Carson's condo. Smallish one bedroom, but clean and neat. Very much had that city-dude bachelor pad feel. Just the right amount of sports memorabilia, but decorated like he'd hired somebody for the job. He set down his keys and wallet and phone on the kitchen island and turned to me, his playfulness and easy confidence giving way to some more urgent horniness. I could read it in his face and in those amazing green eyes.

"OK if we take our time, Boss?" he asked. He was actually a little nervous, which was the thing that put me at ease. And turned me on. "Last time we were a little rushed."

"We were drunk," I reminded him.

"Well, we're not drunk now," Carson reminded. "I wanna enjoy this."

I felt my dick really firming up into a hard ridge. I couldn't believe Wells was gonna give me head again. I'd been thinking about the possibility a lot, but the reality of it was really sinking in. "What are you thinking, Wells?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"It's a real taboo to suck another man's dick, isn't it?" I prompted, throwing back something he'd admitted to me in Denver.

He blushed. "Yeah, it is. Big time. No one knows I'm into this shit."

"I do, Carson." I didn't mean to make him uncomfortable or anything. I was glad as hell he'd felt like he could share this sexual side with me. "I gotta warn you... it's been a couple days since I've gotten off. But if I cum quick, I'm pretty sure I could go again."

"For real?" Wells asked, excitedly. That excitement fed my own horns.

"For real, Wells. If you're up for a longer session."

"God, man, yeah, I am." Then. "I can't believe we're fucking doing this, but it's crazy hot," he admitted, and I loved that he admitted it.

We didn't have the alcohol this time. In some way that made what was about to happen even hotter, but it also lent an awkwardness about how this was going to go down.

"Um.... you prefer to get head standing?" Carson asked. Just hearing that in his bro voice was enough to get me goin.

"I prefer it anyway you wanna give it, Wells," I smiled. This wasn't a Grindr trick, but it wasn't boyfriend/husband sex. Intuitively, I knew to keep up the buddy vibe with Carson, to keep him at ease.

"Why don't you stand, Bill," he said after thinking a second. "It'll be easier for me."

I followed his lead, watching as his gym built body got settled in on his sofa. I undid my belt and got into the look of anticipation on his face as he watched me unzip.

"Niiicee," he said as he watched my hard dong poke out. His eyes didn't leave my crotch. "You got a nice dick, Boss," he added.

"Help yourself," I encouraged. I'd really never fooled around with straight or even straight-ish dudes like Carson, so I didn't know how much I should talk or not talk, but the guy seemed to be into an easy rapport. I didn't do anything but put my hands on my hips and let him explore at his own pace.

Carson started with the licking, like he was measuring the hill he was gonna climb. Long swipes up my thick tool, wetting me down in the process. His trimmed beard made him look both younger and older than his 30 years. I imagined him doing this in whatever fraternity house he live in during college.

I let out a soft gasp when the sales guy finally parted his lips and began going down on me. I didn't know what made Carson Wells tick and maybe I never would, but I couldn't fault his enthusiasm for sucking dick. The guy made love to my cock. There was no other way to put it. Alternating long, wet strokes of his mouth with some suction action, then pulling off to kiss and lick my cock.

"Nice, man," I encouraged. Not wanting to break the spell, but feeling Wells needing some positive feedback for what he was doing.

He didn't suck me too fast, but I was hornier than I realized and had to think of a million things to keep from coming right away. If Wells wanted to take his time, I was gonna let him.

"You might want to pull off, man," I urged quietly, that gonna-cum tension in my voice.

Carson backed off, giving my dick head a little kiss as it pulled out. A string of spittle connected it with his lips and then broke, landing on his beard. For some reason I found that very hot and my dick spurted out some pre.

"Fuck," he laughed and leaned in to swoop it with his tongue. "I got you worked up," he stated, not even a question.

"You have," I replied. "I hope you don't mind me saying this Wells, but you're really good at this."

Carson knew what I was getting at. He had a quiet serious expression as he put his hand on his thighs and stared at my prick. "I don't mind, Boss. Thanks." He looked up at me finally. "So... what do you like when you get head?"

"What do I like?" I asked. I wasn't sure exactly what he was asking.

"Yeah," he said with a grin. "What's your favorite approach... the thing that will get you off hardest."

I let out a heavy breath. "Honestly, Carson... I don't think you wanna know my favorite thing."

He seemed surprised. "Why not?"

There was something about the sincerity of his response that almost had me telling him. "It's a little more, I don't know... extreme."

He let out a little laugh. "Damn, Boss, I didn't picture you as the kinky type."

I shrugged. "Well, I am... at least when it comes to oral," I replied. "But for real, Carson, I love it all. Just love getting head. You had me real close just now."

That seemed to satisfy the guy. He turned his attention back to my dick. "You into deep throat, Boss?"

"Hell yes, I am," I assured him.

He was measuring me with his eyes. "It's been a long time since I've sucked one as big as you," he said, matter of factly. "The length but also the thickness."

"Just do what you feel like, Wells," I said. This wasn't some Grindr cockslut, and I wanted him to feel at ease. "But I'd love to see you try."

He nodded. "Yeah, I wanna," he said. Then Carson started taking me in again, going down on me steadily. He reached about the five inch mark, which was the maximum he'd taken so far. Wells paused at that spot, giving some shallow bobs to test out his throat. Then like a swimmer taking that last jump into cool ocean water, the dude just went for it.

I watched excitedly as Wells buried his nose in my pubes, with a deep grunt stifled in his throat.

"Fuck yes!" I cried. Then, "Oh fuck, that's hot."

It was too. Because it was this hot finance bro, the coworker I had only professional relationship with. A younger, fit dude who I didn't know, not really. And he was now showing off that deep throat.

Until he needed air, or a break. He pulled back to suck in some quick air, breathing out a soft "fuck" as he eyed up my spit wet dong. He took a little breather, then went back to it. He now was giving me some genuine deepthroat head. Up and down, about three inches at a time, swallowing to the root on each go. His throat felt snug as hell and the visuals were only adding to my pleasure.

"I'm gonna cum, Carson!" I hissed. This time I hoped he wouldn't pull off. I really wanted to nut right down his cocksucking throat.

He didn't stop, but rather kept at it. If anything his pace grew a little faster. The sounds got sloppier and I could feel wet spit drip down my balls. That did it. "FUCk!" I cried. I wasn't always a screaming in bed, but I liked to let loose with when a guy sucks me, to give him that feedback.

Carson pulled off, riding out my ejaculation by sucking the top three inches. Apparently he liked tasting a guy's cum too. Or maybe his throat needed a break.

He had a proud smile when he pulled off. He knew he'd done a hell of a job, but I also think I was more dick than he'd deep throated before.

"That was incredible, Bill."

I was catching my breath. "Hell yes, it was," I said. I looked down at my dong which was quickly softening. "I don't you know, Carson... you may have completely drained me with that one."

He chuckled, and I think he liked that he'd gotten me off so well. "That's cool, Boss. But maybe we can do this again soon? Sorry if I've been standoffish lately. It's just a little weird... you know, the work thing."

"You know my lips are sealed, Wells," I assured him. "Fuck, I can't let this get out either."

He flashed me that frat-boy smile then broke the postcoital glow. "Listen, Bill. I should probably get ready for the evening. I'm meeting some buddies in a bit."

"Oh yeah," I muttered as I tucked back in and made myself presentable again. "Well, thank you for getting my weekend off to an incredible spot."

Carson stood up to walk me out. I could tell he was still hard in his trousers. I wondered if he was going to jerk off when I was gone or get off later. I thought of asking him, but didn't.

"Just to be clear, Boss," he said before showing me out. "I don't date guys. At all."

"No worries, Wells," I replied. "I'm not looking for a boyfriend. And I get it."

"Cool," was all he said. I got the sense he had some of that straight-dude second thoughts creeping in now. Or maybe coworker second thoughts.

I tried to downplay anything overly affectionate at that moment. I didn't want to be brusque but I thought being all business would help him. "See you next week, Carson," I said when he opened the door.

He nodded, then as I walked out, he shut the door behind me.

#drakestories

[dilftesbiggestfan]

more dante pookie hcs plz its rare to see dante stans

on it bro I’m giving u mys and diaries hcs cuz why not we gotta be more annoying like laurence stans

Mystreet:

he gets Gene gifts every Father’s Day since from his perspective he was the one who raised him alongside his mom and was the only father figure he had :,)

Has like 12 guitars (this isn’t over-exaggerating)

started dyeing his hair blue after freshman year of HS, his natural hair color is black

he was a late bloomer so he looked more feminine while the others looked masculine and were developing quickly, Nana thought he was adorable which is why she dated him also at some point Zenix thought he was a girl 💀 after 16 he started developing quickly and becoming more masculine till he finished puberty at 20

grew up in Nashville before moving to the city pdh is located in then he went to college in Spain then he moved to wherever Mystreet is (still haven’t decided but its the USA).

has a masters degree in engineering, and has a great paying job which makes it easier for him to travel a lot, he always takes Gene and his friends/family with him though, he hatessss travelling alone

ages gracefully currently he’s 34 in my rewrite and he still looks 24 same goes to gene (but Mystreet seasons 1 - 3 takes place in their early 20’s and mid 20’s; which is the past I know it’s confusing but so is my head so yeah. If ur wondering seasons 4 - 6 don’t exist and never will be canon to me :))

pretty masculine but still uses makeup and “women’s” perfume / skin care doesn’t care tho

cooks really well but he’s not the best because Laurence is and no one else can compete

when he was dating nana he learned Japanese for her and can speak around 80% of it, basically he can hold up a long conversation he can also speak other languages:

English (obviously, American accent)

French 65% Spanish (Mexican dialect cuz he’s Mexican)

(Spain dialect, he learned the European dialect first then worked his way up to Mexican dialect, he can switch between dialects easily)

he can also understand some Portuguese :)

very picky with fast food, he prefers healthy food but he does like pizza

really calm and chill (unlike his canon version) opposite to Travis who’s extremely chaotic and messy

long hair and refuses to cut it

Eventually he does dye his hair back to black in his 30s after feeling like he damaged it (thankfully he didn’t and won’t be balding like dilfte 😇)

Favourite band is Metallica

nerd when it comes to astrophysics and astronomy

only ex he’s in good terms with is nana who he dated for a while in HS before they decided to mutually split up (no he never dated Nicole I hate that ship)

MCD:

Loves wolves and tames them he treats them like puppies even though they can rip apart peoples flesh :3

is 7’2… …. ..

insanely beefed up because bro ran a village all by himself for 15 years and trained hard everyday also he canonically beat both laurence and garroth in a fight after the timeskip he’s a beast

ambidextrous and can use both arms efficiently when it comes to combat and fighting

Dilfte rarely shows his face like how Garroth used to wear his helmet back in s1? it’s like that

Extremely gentle and cautious with his wife and kids because of his size

has 7 kids including Dmitri and naoki (so 5 other kids) yeah he been busy

in s2 he’s in his early/mid 30s but in s3 of MCD and afterwards he’s in his early/mid 40s

Still madly in love with his wife and still in that honeymoon stage

Unlike Nicole he let Dmitri pick who he wanted to live with and Dmitri chose Dilfte and Nana

Wraps injured people up in his cape and carries them in it

physically very strong slightly above garroth (if we’re counting physical strength and not magic)

as intimidating as he looks he’s super sweet and wouldn’t hurt a fly

likes to go on picnics with his kids and wife

Extremely supportive of his kids and very progressive (keep in mind this is the medieval ages so it was rare)

finds lizards intimidating

bisexual but he doesn’t know what it means all he knows is women and men are both hot

Moved on “quickly” from Nicole because they already were unhappy and distant before breaking up, for months he thought they’d break up the next day so he spent that time wallowing and grieving their relationship until she broke the news to him and left him alone, then he moved on with Nana 2 months later. Which isn’t even quick if we’re being historically accurate.

limits drinking and refuses drinking around any kids, not that he’d go crazy and hurt anyone but still he’s extremely cautious.

Dilfte is probably the only dad who wants his kids to surpass him in the series 💀 he’s very proud of them no matter what though

long hair he puts it up usually (balding and short haired dilfte/dante ur dead to me.)

beard

Still tried to talk to Gene using the amulet even after the incident, Gene would always listen but never respond.

thanks for fuelling the hyperfixation

#mystreet #dante aphmau #aphmau dante #aphverse #aphblr #minecraft diaries #aphmau gene #gene aphmau #mystreet dante #mcd dante #mcd gene #laurence zvhal #garroth ro'meave #shadow knights #mcd #chats!!!

[woodywood101blog]

I posted 36 times in 2022

10 posts created (28%)

26 posts reblogged (72%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@neghort

@bigmpregnm

@mpreg-celeb

@justmpreg

@bmbu122

I tagged 30 of my posts in 2022

Only 17% of my posts had no tags

#mpreg - 29 posts

#mpreg caption - 29 posts

#male pregnancy - 29 posts

#mpreg morph - 29 posts

#legal jargon - 1 post

#comment - 1 post

#novak djokovic - 1 post

#novax djocovid - 1 post

Longest Tag: 14 characters

#novak djokovic

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

No one would've picked up that Matt was a teen dad in his suit. The only indication now of having pushed a child out of him were his disproportionately larger legs, which linked to his slighter wider hips compared to other guys... otherwise, he seemed to have kept fit and well after labor.

99 notes - Posted November 1, 2022

#4

The only reason his ass is like that is because he pushed out a large baby the natural way... Not too sure if it will deflate at all, but at least he attracts all kinds of attention.

103 notes - Posted September 24, 2022

#3

Nick had no idea why his belly had exploded in growth over the last month or so, but he's not complaining with the looks of curiosity and pure lust he's seen from other guys at the local pool. Hopefully he might track down the guy who caused all this to happen a couple of months ago, and fast!

Image source: https://www.deviantart.com/kennysosa1234/art/Wet-Outdoors-Morph-941179250 by kennysosa1234 on DeviantArt

104 notes - Posted December 16, 2022

#2

"Jesus, Ben, how many are in there?" John asked.

"I don't know, I think the doctor said there were 4 or 5? But I just don't want to think about it..."

"Bit hard to say that when all your shirts don't fit, you've resorted to bras and unbuttoned jeans, and you are on the verge of having your skin rip apart from how tight this belly is."

"Ughhhhhh...."

111 notes - Posted December 20, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

"Oh bro, come on! You try to not get hungry when you have something inside you that is sucking all the energy out of you All. The. Time!"

Image source: https://www.deviantart.com/kennysosa1234/art/Caught-in-the-Act-of-Endless-Snacking-Morph-923174883 by kennysosa1234 on DeviantArt

197 notes - Posted November 1, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[lelitachay]

Frozen fanfiction: Søsken

Summary: An accident in the North Mountain forces Elsa to spend several weeks in her brother’s apartment under Anna's care. During that time, Anna realises there is more to Elsa than meets the eye. The truth about Elsa’s past comes to light after an unexpected family reunion, and both girls’ lives begin to fall apart when they realise Elsa wasn’t the only one with a big secret and a turbulent past.

Anna/Kristoff - Elsa - Family - Family drama - hurt/comfort - Modern AU - Elsa & Kristoff are adoptive brother and sister - Ice bros - Found family - Serious injuries - Mental health issues - Health issues - Frohana

Links:

Fanfiction.net - HERE

AO3 - HERE

Tumblr - Chapters 1 to 10 - Here   Chapters 11 to 20 - Here Chapters 21 to 30 - Here Chapters 31 to 40 - Here Chapter 41 - Here Chapter 42 - Here Chapter 43 - Here Chapter - 44 - Here

-

Comfortably numb

Is there anybody in there?

“Anna?” Elsa said, blinking a few times as she realised her sister was standing in the kitchen, her forearms casually resting on the top rail of the opposite chair. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey, you.” Anna smiled at her and sat down on the chair. “Kristoff called me this morning. He said you weren't doing so well. I wanted to give you some time to get better, but I just had to come, you know? Make sure you are alright after everything that happened.”

“I'm fine.” The answer came automatically, and Elsa wondered how long she had stayed sitting there, unmoving. It couldn’t be long, if not, Gerda would’ve dragged her to bed. She remembered ending a call with Marshall but she couldn't for the life of her remember what she had planned to do afterwards. Hadn't she been planning to go to bed? She raised her head and saw Anna, looking at her with a puzzled expression. How long had she stayed silent? Her mind kept lagging and the fog kept getting thicker. "You shouldn't have bothered coming. It's just a fever."

"No offence," Anna said, dropping her smile. "But you look terrible. Are you sure you're okay?"

"The drugs make me dizzy, that's all." No matter how hard she tried to downplay it, something told Elsa she was not fooling anyone this time. She was feeling weaker than she had in years and the dull ache all over her body was becoming difficult to ignore.

"Do you want me to come back another time? I totally don't mind—"

"Stay," Elsa ordered, not giving Anna much of an option. "This nausea will go away…" She couldn’t remember the amount of times she had repeated that over the day and hoped her sister could become a needed distraction. 

"It’s nice to see you’re finally eating something.” Anna pointed with her head to the brunost toasts that were still waiting to be eaten. “Seriously, I wonder how you manage to go on for hours without food in your stomach. We skipped lunch today and I can barely think of anything else.”

"You like it, don't you?” Elsa pushed the tray closer to Anna, showing no intention of eating the food in it. She had given her best trying to drink the tea Gerda had made, but all she had managed was half a cup.

Anna’s cheeks flushed red. "Are you sure?" 

Elsa smiled and thought of how truly endearing her sister could be without realising. Her eyes were shining at the mere prospect of eating something as simple as some toast with cheese on top. She pushed the tray closer and nodded.

Without a second thought, Anna grabbed one of the toasts and took a bite without decorum. "Thank you. I love these," she said with her mouth full.

Elsa smiled again and enjoyed the silence that surrounded them while Anna preoccupied herself with the food. Even if it only lasted a few seconds.

And true to it, Anna carried on the conversation as soon as her mouth could articulate the sounds. "So…?" she said, as if she was expecting Elsa to start talking.

"Huh?"

"Will you tell me what happened the other night?"

"What do you mean?"

"The last time we saw each other," Anna began to say as she grabbed a second toast. "You left Kristoff’s place to go after Marshall. You can’t expect me not to ask about it." She then took another big bite, making Elsa wonder what would happen if Anna ever had to go without food for more than ten hours.

“So…” Anna insisted when she noticed Elsa had yet again got distracted.

It had only been a day and a half since those things had happened, but to Elsa it felt much longer. The fever had made her lose track of time in the worst sense and she felt the hours stretch for as long as they could at times. It was yet another way she felt she was losing control and she couldn’t stand it.

"We talked and…" Sighing tiredly, Elsa tried to come up with something to say that wouldn’t force her to talk about all that again. "You were right, I guess. I had to have more faith in him."

"I knew it!" Anna said with a triumphant laugh. "Now give me the details."

"There isn’t much to say." She was happy about having talked to Marshmallow, but she didn't have the energy to truly dwell on it, at least not the way Anna was expecting.

Just as Anna was opening her mouth to complain, Gerda walked into the kitchen, giving a fleeting glance to the tray in front of Anna. Her mouth twitched in disapproval for just a split of a moment and Elsa looked away, not wanting to see her disappointed look.

"Sorry to interrupt," Gerda said with a smile, pretending to ignore Elsa’s lack of appetite. "It’s time for Elsa to take these."

Elsa pulled a face as soon as her mother placed the small pill cup in front of her. “Is it really necessary?”

“Anna, would you like something to drink?” Gerda asked her daughter-in-law, paying no mind to Elsa’s question.

“I guess it is,” Elsa murmured to herself, knowing perfectly well when Gerda’s lack of an answer was an answer in itself.

Anna smiled and answered Gerda's question before she turned to Elsa to continue their conversation. “You didn’t return. You must have gone somewhere.”

“I just went home.” Elsa made an effort to sit up straighter on her chair and picked the cup, not without looking at the pills inside with disgust.

“Kristoff said Marshall brought you here yesterday,” Anna suggested, hoping it would get Elsa to say something about it.

To Anna’s disappointment, Elsa didn’t answer. She was too concerned about the pills she had to take and the presence of her mother, who was still in the kitchen. She was certain her Gerda wouldn't leave any time soon, and she needed to find a way to take them without making her stomach turn. Deep down she knew her legs wouldn't support her weight on the way to the bathroom if she couldn't keep them in.

Being so focused on the medicine, Elsa failed to notice Gerda, who was calling Anna's attention over her shoulder. She had been paying attention to their conversation and decided to point out one important detail Anna hadn't noticed. 

Anna understood there was something the old woman was trying to tell her, but she couldn’t interpret what it was. Until, after a few seconds of Gerda’s exasperated looks and mimics, the realisation dawned on her. Gerda was playfully trying to show her Elsa's extremely oversized t-shirt. A t-shirt Anna was sure didn’t belong to Kristoff.

The moment Elsa raised her eyes again, she was surprised to see Anna's accusatory finger pointing at her. "You stinker…” Anna said, a grin slowly drawing on her face as she spoke. "You're wearing one of his t-shirts!" 

Elsa put the cup down and looked at her sister again before she looked down at the clothes she was wearing. She breathed out in irritation when she noticed she was in fact still wearing the t-shirt Marshall had lent her the previous day.

“You two spent the night together, didn’t you?” Anna amusingly accused, not being able to hide her excitement.

“No, we didn’t.” Elsa knew there was nothing she could say or do at this point to convince Anna otherwise, but somehow she had to try. At least to save Marshall from whatever story Anna was coming up with in her head.

Before Anna had the chance to protest, however, Gerda spoke again. And what Elsa originally thought to be her mother coming to her rescue, turned out to be an act of treachery. "It’s none of my business," Gerda said, pretending to be on Elsa's side. "But the blanket in her room is not hers either."

Turning around, as fast as her headache and dizziness allowed her, Elsa fulminated the old woman with a simple look. "Gerda, please, you’re not helping," she said between her teeth.

"Thank you for showing me your daughter is a barefaced liar, Gerda," Anna laughed and Elsa wished the earth could swallow her at that moment.

Once again, she couldn't help thinking how stupid she had been for not trusting Marshall the night she lost control of her powers. Staying at the mountain and talking to him — even if she suffered a second panic attack — had to be better than suffering from high fever, pain, and now feeling as if she'd die of embarrassment. "You two are getting it all wrong," she said in a small voice.

Not knowing what to do to hide her mortification, she leaned on the table and hid her face in the crook of her good arm. She could feel her head becoming extremely hot, making her feel even sicker than before. She wasn't sure if it was the embarrassment or her body choosing the worst possible time to raise its temperature, but she wanted the insufferable feeling to go away.

"Not to go against your word, dear.” She could hear Gerda say, as she lay a comforting hand on her back. “But, you’re the one who came home in your friend’s arms, wrapped up in one of his blankets and wearing his clothes. I think we are getting it just right."

"I don’t know why I even bother," Elsa murmured, her arm and the wooden table muffling her voice. Even if she had a justified reason to explain everything that had happened, she was too tired to deal with any of it anymore. All she wanted to do was go to bed and ignore Anna and Gerda, as well as the headache.

The older woman smiled sadly at her daughter and gently stroked her back. She reminded Elsa to take her pills, and with an excuse of needing to make a phone call in the other room, she left both girls alone once again.

Even if deep down Anna knew there was no need to keep dragging Elsa over the mud, she couldn’t let the chance of finally knowing what was really going on between her sister and the mountaineer escape. "You’re a terrible liar, you know?" she commented nonchalantly, unaware of Elsa's discomfort. “At this point I don’t even know why you try.”

"You make a big deal out of everything," Elsa said in a low voice.

The table tilted under the palm of her hand, and she raised her head to try and regain some stability. Her breathing was becoming more elaborated and her head was spinning. Knowing she couldn’t stay where she was for much longer, she tried to stand up but her legs wouldn’t cooperate, forcing her to use both arms to hold her weight on the table.

"Of course I make a big deal out of everything you two do. You're the only one blind enough not to see—  Hey! Wow, Elsa, are you okay?” Anna stood up and tried to catch her before she fell to the ground.

Cursing out loud at the pain, Elsa let her body slump into the chair before Anna reached her. The sudden movement and pain that coursed through her hand left Elsa gasping for breath. She wasn’t supposed to be feeling this way. It was just a fever…

Get you on your feet again.

“What?” Elsa said breathlessly, looking up and finding Anna leaning over her.

“I asked if you were okay. What happened?”

Realising her mind was playing tricks, bringing back memories she wished she could erase, she nodded and tried to get a hold of her breathing. "Can you help me get to my room?"

--

"Help you get–” Anna repeated, still trying to make sense of everything that had happened in an instant. She was aware Elsa had not been feeling well, yet she hadn't imagined her body was so weak it wouldn't support its own weight. “Are you sure you're okay?"

“Please…” Elsa begged Anna to help her and she cursed under her breath for not noticing Elsa was so sick sooner. “I don't want Gerda to worry. The dizziness will go away, but I need to lay down."

"Sure, let me– I'm sorry,” Anna said as she put an arm around her sister’s waist. “I didn't realise. I'm sorry."

After insisting Elsa leaned all her weight on her, Anna walked her out of the kitchen and straight into her bedroom. The moment they got there, Elsa allowed her body to sink into the bed with a heavy sight.

Sitting on the bed next to her sister, Anna cupped Elsa's face with one hand and exclaimed, “God, Elsa… You’re burning.”

“I can’t feel my powers anymore.”

Anna couldn't understand what she meant, but something told her Elsa had no energy left to explain it, and so she didn't ask.

“Elsa…” Anna called her name as she gently pushed her bangs away from her eyes. “Are you sure you don't want us to call a doctor? You don't look good.”

“All he does is put me to sleep,” Elsa explained through laboured breaths. “Making me sicker by the time I wake up again. I’ll be fine, I promise.”

Anna looked at her with a pained expression, feeling conflicted. She knew how much Elsa despised the way drugs, and being in the presence of a doctor, made her feel, but she looked too sick to convince her she would get well on her own anytime soon. “I don’t know, Elsa. At least we should let Gerda know.”

“You know,” Elsa said, ignoring Anna’s concern. She was looking at her, but she didn't seem to be able to stay focused. “When I was a child I had a fever. Now I've got that feeling once again.”

‘I had the worst fever I’ve ever had that night…’ The memory of their conversation about her childhood all those months ago slammed back into Anna's memories, making her shudder. Was her sister feeling the same way she had felt back then? “I'm calling Gerda.”

But before Anna could leave her side, Elsa stopped her by holding her wrist. The grab was weak, but it meant enough to stop Anna from leaving. "Els, please, at least let me go get your medicine."

"Stay…" Elsa insisted, tightening her hold on Anna's wrist slightly.

She was certain Elsa's frown was meant to appease her pain and Anna felt like an idiot for letting her sister fool her. The first thing she had noticed when she got in the kitchen was how weak and tired she looked sitting alone, unaware of her presence. It should've been plain obvious she had been lying about the way she was feeling.

Making up her mind, Anna decided to sit back down next to Elsa, hoping she would fall asleep soon. Only then, she would tell Gerda what was going on. She wouldn't be respecting her sister's wishes exactly, but at least she'd let her sleep for a while before Gerda or anyone started prodding at her.

Absent-mindedly, Anna began to comb her sister's bangs with her fingers. Trying to keep them away from her eyes and not let them stick to her clammy forehead. She stayed by her side for several minutes until, as she had expected, Elsa's eyelids began to close. In less than half an hour, Elsa fell into a deep sleep and Anna took the opportunity to go out of the room and find Gerda.

She had only walked a few steps into the living room when she found her standing by the door with Kai and an older man she didn’t know.

"Anna, I'm glad you're here,” Gerda said, walking towards her as soon as she saw her. “I was on my way to tell you and Elsa that the doctor has arrived."

Breathing out in relief, Anna nodded. "I’m so glad to hear that. She fell asleep some minutes ago, but wasn't doing so well.”

"Something told me she wasn’t being honest." Walking past Anna, Gerda went into Elsa's room. "She's gotten worse in the last couple of hours. I called Jonnas as soon as I noticed her fever had gone up again."

"She said she was feeling dizzy when we were in the kitchen earlier." She didn't think 'dizzy' would describe the way Elsa almost fell to the ground, but she had no better word for it. "I had to help her get to bed. I think she's in pain too."

"Pain?" Gerda said, turning back to her. "Like a headache?"

"I don't know. I don't know how to describe it.” Anna said, getting closer. Gerda was already sitting by Elsa’s side and about to measure her temperature. “You could see she was trying to hide it. She didn’t want to worry you."

Gerda shook her head a few times, worry written all over her face. “If only she’d let me help her, it wouldn’t come to this.” A frown appeared on Gerda’s face when she checked the thermometer. “I'll let the doctor in. You can stay if you want, Anna, but we need to make sure—"

"Don't worry about me," Anna said, shaking her hands in front of her. "I was planning on going home, but I wanted to make sure someone checked on her before I did."

Gerda smiled at her and then turned her attention back to her daughter. "Could you please tell Jonnas to come into Elsa's room? He's talking with Kai in the living room."

With a nod, Anna exited her sister's room and headed to the living room to give the doctor the message as well as pick up her things.

"It's not my place to say if what happened was right or wrong." Anna heard the man say to Kai from the hallway. "But all his colleagues were on his side. He's an emotional man and made a mistake, Kai."

"He's been spending a lot of time with Elsa lately."

Kai's seriousness caught Anna's attention, and she couldn't stop herself from listening a bit more while she picked her jacket and the bag she had been carrying.

"You say that as if it's a bad thing."

"I'm afraid he might do something to her, Jonnas."

Jonnas laughed and Anna thought it didn't make much sense for the doctor to be acting so nonchalantly while Kai seemed so concerned.

"Do you want my opinion?" Jonnas said, resting a comforting hand on Kai's shoulder. "He's a little rough around the edges, but he has a sense of justice worth admiring. He wears his heart upon his sleeve too. I'd say it's a good thing if he keeps Elsa company in the mountains."

It certainly seemed like they were talking about Marshall but, no matter how intrigued she was, it was not her place to ask. She gathered her things and decided to stop their conversation before they got carried away. "Excuse me, Dr. Jonnas?" Anna called their attention. "Gerda asked me to tell you you should go see Elsa. She's in her bedroom."

Turning in her direction, the man smiled and thanked her for letting him know. He picked a bag he had at his feet and left her standing with Kai.

"How's Elsa?" Kai asked, ignoring that she had been listening to their conversation.

"I think it's a good thing the doctor came to see her."

--

Closing the door behind her, Anna looked at her watch and wondered which bus would be best for her to take. It was still early evening, but she had planned to have dinner with her parents and she wanted to have a moment to talk with Idunn while she cooked. Watching her mother cook was one of Anna's favourite family moments ever since she was a kid. And one she wished Elsa could one day enjoy alongside them, but she was trying to stay realistic about it. If she was honest, the day the three of them could sit down to talk seemed too far into the future to even picture it at that moment.

Finally making up her mind on which bus to take, she walked a few metres down the street and noticed there was a familiar SUV parked only a house away from the Bjorgmans'. A mischievous smile drew on her face and she walked straight to the vehicle.

Anna knocked twice on the passenger's window, and laughed at the driver's startled face. "I knew this truck was familiar." Anna said loudly, making sure Marshall heard her from inside.

Marshall leaned over the passenger’s seat and rolled down the window. He looked quite annoyed at her interruption, but Anna knew he was probably only ashamed he had been caught.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, leaning on her elbows over the open window.

"The man who just entered the house is Dr Nielsen, isn’t he?" Marshall asked, not paying attention to Anna's question.

"Is his first name Jonnas?"

Breathing out, doing nothing to conceal his annoyance, he nodded.

"Then that's him. What's wrong?" Deep down she hoped his discontent had nothing to do with the kind of professional the man was.

"Is Mr Bjorgman in the house?"

There was clearly something on Marsh's mind and Anna was too curious on what it was to start complaining about him ignoring her questions. "The two of them were talking in the living room when I left."

"Damn it," Marshal said under his breath and rested his forehead on the steering wheel.

"Everything okay, big guy?" Anna couldn't pretend she wasn't intrigued at that point. One thing was for him to be asking about the doctor and another too different was Kai's presence to be a problem.

"It doesn’t matter…" he said and leaned over towards the passenger's door once again to unlock it. He then gestured to Anna to get inside. "How’s Elsa?" he asked as soon as Anna was sitting by his side.

"You could easily knock on the door and visit her, you know?” she said playfully. “I just did."

Breathing out exasperatedly once again, Marshall tried to keep his irritation under control. "Forget about it." 

"I’m just messing with you." Anna laughed and gently pushed his arm. "So, why are you lurking in the shadows again?"

"I think it's pretty obvious."

Anna looked at him and then at Kai and Gerda's house that could be seen from where they were parked. "You know, I fully support you and I’d like for you to become my brother-in-law one day, but this is borderline stalker behaviour."

Turning red as a beet, Marshall avoided Anna's gaze. "I'm not stalking. I was trying to make up my mind about visiting Elsa when you knocked on my window."

The fact he ignored her comment about them becoming family made Anna grin from ear to ear. His silence on the matter was all the confirmation that she needed at this point. "You don't need to be so shy, you know? Her family won't mind you visiting."

"I wouldn't be so sure," he said, still not meeting her eyes.

"Don’t be ridiculous." She felt as if he was exaggerating, but she could remember how nervous she'd been about meeting the Bjorgmans the first time. She could understand Marshall's apprehension about making the right impression. "You mean the world to Elsa, there's no way they won't—"

"Kai kicked me out last night."

"—welcome you and make you feel… Wait, what?” Anna stopped talking abruptly, trying to make sense of what he had just said. She couldn’t think of a single reason Kai could do something like that. The man was even sweeter than Gerda, for heaven’s sake. "No way,” she said in disbelief. “Did something happen between you two?"

"He blames me for what happened to Elsa.”

"Why would he blame—?"

“We argued and he kicked me out." He stopped her before she sidetracked and their conversation ended up revolving around himself. "Can you tell me how Elsa’s doing?" 

It took a moment for Anna to come out of her shock, as she kept trying to find reasonable explanations to Kai acting in such a way. But she decided to leave it for another time.

"I’m not sure… She was too sick to even stand.” She felt awful about giving him bad news, but the last thing she’d do was lie to him. Maybe knowing Elsa’s condition would give him the push he needed to finally go knock on the Bjorgmans’ door and visit her.

"Did you get to talk to her?"

The concern written in his eyes melted Anna's heart, making her realise what Elsa meant when she said he was the softest person she knew. “She didn't say much,” Anna said, shaking her head. “She was weak, dizzy… and I think she was in pain.”

“How about the fever?”

“High.”

Marshall ran his good hand through his hair and let it rest on the back of his neck, softly massaging it to release some tension. “She called me earlier today, she insisted she was okay but– I don't know…”

Anna looked at the Bjorgmans’ house and wondered if there was something serious going on with Elsa. Gerda was more worried than she remembered ever seeing her, and now Marshall seemed to be concerned as well. Sure, they both loved Elsa, but they were usually more calm and collected than the rest of them. “The doctor's with her right now… Is there a reason we should be worried?”

“Ugh? No. No…” He hesitated. “Don’t worry. Are you staying with Kristoff? Is he picking you up?”

“Oh?” The sudden change of topic made her wonder if there was something he wasn’t telling her; but then again, Anna had no reason not to trust him. If the situation was truly concerning, she was certain he’d be knocking down the Bjorgmans’ door by now. “No. He’s working late today. I was on my way to take a bus home when I saw your car.”

“I'll drive you home, then.” Not waiting for an answer, Marshall started the car and drove off.

“It's not necessary,” Anna tried to say, but he was already focused on his task.

“I’ll feel more useful taking you home than sitting in the car, debating about knocking on Kai’s door or not.”

Understanding he needed to feel useful somehow, Anna ended up accepting his offer. She told him her parents’ address and then let him drive her there in almost complete silence. One thing was to be annoying and talkative when she wanted to get on his nerves or tease him about Elsa, but another thing was to act that way when she could see he was feeling so uneasy about everything that was going on.

To Anna’s surprise, however, he broke the silence before she did. “You’re rarely this quiet,” he said, turning to look at her.

“So… You now know about Elsa, right?” Anna asked, understanding that too quiet could be as bothersome as too talkative sometimes.

With a small smile, he nodded. “We talked the other night. I’ll be honest, I don't understand it. But I want to try…”

“We were all there…” Anna agreed, understanding exactly how he felt. Even if she had been completely accepting of Elsa’s powers, she couldn’t deny the strange feeling she got whenever she looked at her the first few weeks. It wasn’t fear. It wasn't a lack of comfort around her either. But there was this constant feeling of things not making sense. Even to this day, whenever she stopped to think about her sister, Anna had to accept Elsa didn’t make sense. And no doubt Marshall was feeling the same way. “I mean, we still are,” she clarified. “I don’t think any of us really understand.”

“Have you known for a long time?”

“Six or seven months… It seems longer, though.” On the inside, Anna felt as if she had known Elsa for years at this point. So much had happened between their families, it almost felt ridiculous to say she had known about her powers for only seven months.

“I wish she would’ve had more faith in me…” He said in a low voice. His eyes were fixed in the lights and cars in front of him, yet his mind was far away. “At least enough to tell me before all of this happened.”

“She didn’t ‘tell me’ tell me,” Anna reassured him. By all means, the two of them had been friends for a lot longer than Elsa and she had, it was only logical he felt somewhat hurt about finding out several months after her. Though the truth is there was no reason to compare. Things had been so extraordinarily different for them both. To mention one thing, she owed her friendship with Elsa to an accident in which she had almost died. “She lost control and the truth came to light. She didn’t tell anyone as far as I’m aware. She’s afraid of people leaving her behind, that’s why it’s hard for her to open up. But I’m sure she’s thrilled with the idea of you knowing. You mean so much more to her than you imagine.”

Even if he tried to keep a straight face, Anna noticed the small smile that drew on his face, making her smile as well. It was in moments like this Anna wished Elsa could see Marshall, truly see him, and notice the immeasurable devotion he had for her. He probably smiled that way in front of her too, but her sister was too blind to see it.

The two of them remained silent for the rest of the trip after that. They were both absorbed in their own thoughts and the atmosphere was too peaceful to disturb with small talk. When Marshall finally came to a full stop in front of her parents’ house, Anna turned to him and thanked him for the ride.

“It’s the least I could do.” Marshall said with an honest smile. “You stood by my side the other night, telling Elsa to give us a chance to talk.”

Anna felt proud she had stood by what she thought was right that night, and knowing Marshall appreciated it, made her feel even better about it. At least she hadn't intervened for naught. “My pleasure.” 

Getting out of the car, Anna realised it wasn't usual for them to have a chance to talk so openly to one another. She could see Marshall was slowly but steadily letting her in, and allowing her to see a side he usually reserved for Elsa exclusively. Taking advantage of this strange opportunity and Marshall's good predisposition, Anna dared say, “Could I ask you a favour?"

"Sure."

"Please, go visit her.” It may seem as if Anna was just teasing him once again, though she truly wanted Marshall to see Elsa. There were things her sister only confided in him, and she was certain Elsa would love to see him. “She couldn’t even keep her head up but she took the time to call you. You have to agree with me that means something."

"Stop playing tricks,” he said, his voice serious.

"No need to be so distrustful,” Anna complained. “It’s not like you haven’t won her affection already. She’s wearing your clothes after all…” She rejoiced in watching his stoic attitude crumbling and being replaced by deep mortification. “See you, big guy."

She had only walked a few metres when Marshall called her again, making Anna smile. She was certain he had finally come up with an excuse.

“Anna, wait! Wait,” he repeated as he came out of the vehicle. “I have something for you. I just remembered.”

“Something for me?”

“When Elsa called me earlier today, she said to please bring these clothes back.” He handed her a brown paper bag. “I think it’s easier to just give them to you directly. I washed them this morning.”

Looking inside the bag, she noticed there were in fact clothes inside. It was not a joke or something of the sort. “Clothes?”

“The ones she was wearing yesterday?” Marshall tried to explain. His flushed face made Anna smile again, but she couldn’t come up with something to say, too surprised about the clothes in her hand. “She said they’re yours and insisted I bring them. For a moment I thought she was afraid of me losing them or something.”

“Are you sure she said they were mine?” She took the hoodie out of the bag and opened her eyes in surprise when she noticed the worn out stamp on its front. It was the one they had both been talking about the night they went out looking for food.

“Yes,” Marshal insisted. “Do you want me to take them to Elsa anyway? I thought it was easier this way.”

“No,” Anna said, swiftly putting the things inside the bag once again. “No, it’s okay. Thank you for washing them. And thanks again for the ride.” She couldn’t really explain how Elsa had got her clothes, but Anna was certain she hadn’t left them in her house and much less lent them.

--

His conversation with Anna kept replaying in Marshall’s head on his way to the Bjorgmans’. His brain kept telling him not to trust Anna’s word, there always existed the possibility of her trying to play tricks on him or Elsa, and he was not willing to walk straight into one of her ruses. But despite what his most sensible side kept repeating, his heart urged him to go and see Elsa. First and foremost, he wanted to make sure she was getting the medical help she needed. Next in order, was finding out if she had called him earlier because she actually wanted him by her side. And if that were the case, then he would fight tooth and nail until Kai allowed him to stay. He wasn’t planning on leaving her side until she said otherwise. He knew coming to a common ground with Bjorgman was going to be difficult, but he wasn’t planning on giving up so easily.

He knew there existed the possibility of things going south easily, but he wasn’t planning on making a u-turn and going back to the mountain this time. No matter how tempting it was. He needed to face the music and be the bigger person if he wanted to see Elsa and stay by her side for as long as she needed him.

As he was getting closer to the Bjorgmans' household, some blue and white lights called his attention. The yellow vehicle was parked a few blocks ahead, right in front of his destination, and it made Marshall’s blood run cold. He had driven those ambulances long enough to recognise them from a distance and know the blinking lights meant there was an emergency.

Once he was in front of the house, he parked his car as best as he could, without wasting too much time, and he stepped out to see what was going on. As a former paramedic he knew how incredibly inconvenient it was to work with people gathering around, but still he couldn’t stop himself from dashing to the front door of the house which was wide open.

From the threshold, he could hear people giving orders and he knew it was a matter of time until the paramedics carried someone to the ambulance. Not wanting to interrupt their work, he made an effort to stay outside the house, silently begging they weren’t there for Elsa. To his consternation, a few moments later a pair of paramedics walked out of Elsa’s room rolling a gurney with them.

Marshall stepped back, clearing their path, and he tried to take a moment to calm his racing heart. He knew what the men were doing was part of a routine procedure. One he had done hundreds of times. And he reminded himself that Elsa being taken to a hospital didn’t mean anything in particular. But, regardless of it all, as soon as the paramedics walked out the house and he saw Elsa struggling to breathe, his own breath caught in his throat.

A sudden need to feel useful and help pushed him to their side, offering his help. It was then he realised one of the paramedics was one of his former colleagues. He noticed Karl stopping for a fraction of a second, almost giving him a task, but the man then shook his head, stopping himself in time. "I need you to step back."

"Karl, please—"

"You hated people who did this, Marshall, step back," he ordered, and Marshall obeyed.

People getting in the way only made the work more difficult, he knew that, even if his heart told him he was supposed to help the girl on that gurney. He shook his head and he cursed under his breath for letting the situation affect him so much.

Nielsen and Gerda came out of the house a moment after, Nielsen wasting no time in giving the paramedics some orders Marshall couldn't quite hear. And Gerda, on her part, stopped halfway to the ambulance, coming to a stop only to talk with her husband.

“Find Elsa’s medical record. The green folder.” She ordered. “I'll call you as soon as I can."

"Are you going to the central hospital?"

“I don’t know.” She yelled, as she hurried to the ambulance.

“Why?”

"It's too far away. People are commuting at this hour and it's an emergency…" Marshall answered automatically, not even thinking about the fact that Bjorgman had asked his wife, who was already getting in the ambulance, and not him.

With surprise, Kai turned to look at him, and even if his eyes narrowed for a short moment, the old man brushed aside their previous confrontations and said, "You were a paramedic, kid, were you not? What am I supposed to do in this situation? Is there anything I can do?"

"Not much,” he said honestly. His attention on the ambulance moving and the siren that had just turned on. Being on their side meant waiting, no matter how much they hated it. “It's either watch them go and hope for a call soon enough, or follow them."

When he didn’t answer, Marshall looked at Kai and immediately noticed his trembling hands. He was so nervous he couldn’t think straight, making his experience as a police officer useless at that point. Feeling bad for the old man, he offered the only thing he could. "Come on, we'll follow," he suggested. "No one will tell us anything when we get there, but at least you won't be waiting for a call in an empty house."

"I should—" Turning around, Kai looked at the garage door, debating what to do.

"You're in no condition to drive right now, Mr Bjorgman. Go get the folder. I'll drive you to the hospital and back if you need. Don’t worry."

--

She could sense people around her. They were moving her, holding her, keeping her in place. And even though her mind cried for her to stay awake and alert, she realised didn’t care too much this time. She had lived through this before. She couldn’t remember when, but she recognised the feeling: The shortness of breath. The pain. She was at the mercy of strangers once again and her memories served her well to remind her there was no point in fighting. No matter how distressingly familiar it felt, she didn’t have the strength.

A man placed a mask over her face, but for the first time in her life, she didn’t care. She welcomed being deprived of all sensations.

“You'll be fine, Elsa. I promise.”

The voice felt distant but she recognised it.

“I’ll be by your side at all times.” The voice raised her hand and placed a soft kiss on its palm. “I promise.”

She forced an eyelid to open and from the corner of her eye she caught a glimpse of Gerda. She wasn’t sure if it was real or part of her delusion, but in the numbness and loneliness she felt, the old woman became her anchor, and she allowed her mind to drift off to sleep.

--

Any Pink Floyd fans out there? Did you see what I did? I’m proud of it. As several other titles and chapters in this story, this chapter was inspired by music. This time around it was Pink Floyd’s song Comfortably Numb. I recommend you listen to it if you haven't. It's a masterpiece.

About the chapter, it wasn’t difficult to plan, but it was to execute. I couldn’t find the character’s inner voices. I found myself writing and rewriting scenes all the time. But, I like how it turned out.

About the cliffhanger. This time I tried, my cat knows I tried as hard as I could not to end the chapter in a cliffhanger, but no matter which scene I chose, it felt like one. So, at the end I said, “Oh, f*ck it” and ended it here. I’m sorry.

Feel free to leave all the comments you want. I don’t mind you cursing me. And as always, while you’re at it, let me know what you think of the chapter! Haha.

Thank you all for your reviews and awesome comments. They make my day.

I hope you have a great weekend and that we can read each other soon.

Take care.

Tags:

@swimmingnewsie @melody-fox @kristoffxannafanatic @kristannafictionals @neptrabbit  @skneez @ellacarter13 @wondering-in-life @who-i-am-8 @fanfictionrecommendations-com  @815-allisnotlost @khartxo @joannevixxon @betweenthedreams @burbobah @rileysfs  @earlvessalius  @blood-jewel @snowycrocus @the-sky-is-awake @disneyfan103 @anamaria8garcia @welovefrozenfanfiction  @bigfrozenfan @bigfrozenfan-archive @frozenartscapes  @deisymendoza  @zackhaikal123  @cornstarch @roostercrowedatmidnight @showurselfelsa @when-dawn-arrives @tare-disney  @wabitham @just-your-local-history-nerd @dontrunintofirexoxo @daphmckinnon @poketin @luna-and-mars  @shimmeringsunsets @aries1708  @wabitham @agentphilindaisy @spkfrozenkindikids123 @jimmi-arts @snowmanmelting @loonysama  @hiptoff @loonysama @tare-disney @frozenwolftemplar  @true–north @holycolordreamertree @bigfrozensix

Those who don’t want to be tagged anymore, please let me know on PM!

#søsken #sosken #anna #elsa #kristoff #frozen fanfiction #frozen fanfic #frozen #Marshmallow #Gerda #Kai #Chapter 45

[tearyeye-private-i]

Jerry Lee Lewis, c. July 1959. From JLL.org

Elvis Presley, Knickerbocker Hotel, Hollywood, August 18, 1956. From ElvisPresleyMusic.com.

[ 12 Days of Christmas 💕 5/12 ]

At the start of my research, I found all sorts of stories, I wasn’t sure were even true. Like, Elvis and Jerry Lee riding around on motorcycles, with no clothes on the streets of Memphis, in the middle of the night? No way – but as time passed, the story got brought up to him three times (from what I know). He had a consistent reaction, that has led me to believe it happened.

Though, the stories are subjective, so you can draw your own conclusion!

The first reference of the story:

“In a crowded basement meeting room at the posh Omni-Memphis Hotel, 20-some journalists are attempting, with difficulty, to grill the subject of the forthcoming film “Great Balls of Fire”

The discussion, which never quite seems to interconnect, has degenerated to a foreign-sounding report’s question about whether the film’s subject, Jerry Lee Lewis – rock music’s archetypal bad boy – ever motorbiked naked with Elvis Presley, his fellow Memphian an ultra-rival.

“Motorbike?” Lewis says, archly, dismissively.

“Nekkid? Me and Elvis Presley?” His eyes suddenly narrow, “how’d you know that?”

“It’s in Joe Smith’s book,” says a reporter.

“You can’t believe nothin’…” Lewis mutters, his voice trailing off. “Well, that was 3 o’clock in the morning,” he suddenly adds, prompting explosive laughter from the journalists. “It really was,” he goes on with a grain.

“There was nobody out then—except this one policeman on a horse, and he was doing his dead-level best to catch us. Now, that was a sight. If anybody woulda saw that, we never woulda sold no more records. That woulda been the end of that.” Pause, his eyes narrowing again. “How’d you know that?”

“It’s in Joe Smith’s book,” the reporter repeats.

“Who’s Joe Smith?”

“The head of Capitol Records. Used to be head of Elektra Records.”

“Well, that’s ridiculous. That’s not right. Do you believe that?”

“You just told us it happened at 3 o’clock in the morning,” the reported notes.

“I can’t believe people will believe anything you say.”

“Well, is it true?” Another reporter asks.

“Yes. It’s true.”

Welcome, folks to talking with the Killer, a 54-year-old rock king dethroned before his time – in fact, before his prime – by the 1958 disclosure of a mad marriage to his 13-year-old second cousin.

The scandal caused Lewis, a Bible college dropout, to fall from rock ‘n’ roll grace into comparative oblivion – made all the more bruising by the fact that he was arguably the most intense performer, and most brilliant self-taught pianist, to ever rattle music stages around the world.”

From “THE KILLER BLOWS SMOKE FOR ‘FIRE’” by Jack Hurst and Country music. Chicago Tribune, June 24, 1989.

The second reference is from the book the reporter mentioned, actually, it’s called “Buddy Holly: Biography” by Ellis Amburn. In it, Ellis wrote that record executive Joe Smith and Jerry Lee spoke on the plane, during Buddy Holly, along with Paul Anka’s tour to Australia. They’d been drinking when Jerry Lee “confessed,” which is the word Ellis used. That yes, indeed, he and Elvis went on a naked motorcycle ride at 2:30 AM in Memphis, in a young Jerry Lee’s own words; “only for thirty-five or forty seconds, ‘round the corner and back.”

The third reference was from “Jerry Lee Lewis: His Own Story” by Rick Bragg. When asked the same question, instead of brushing it off or saying it wasn’t true. Jerry Lee laughed and said he can’t say anything about that because “Elvis isn’t here to defend himself.”

So, while Jerry Lee was right that you can’t believe everything anyone says, that doesn’t mean there aren’t patterns. Maybe, he thought it was funny to lie. Maybe, it happened and so what? It’s just two bros cruising down the street at night, naked on motorbikes, 5 feet apart – ‘cause they’re not gay. 😋

Other important lessons are if you do happen to go motorbiking naked with your supposed arch nemesis, don’t get caught, and don’t tell anyone about it!

#Jerry Lee Lewis #He saw Elvis nekkid #Elvis Presley #He didn't know how to act #only around the corner #only #It's like he tryna convince himself #Sun//JLL #Sun//EP #Sun//Together #Story Time #//MyPosts #//Edits #JLL//50s #EP//50s

[moonjxsung]

upon learning the term bedrotting i feel like 80% of my life has been just that. so i completely get it, i bedrot unless i absolutely need to go out (✨depression✨)

fr perv hanji brings out my past wattpad dramatic af 1D fic self. i love him, he also lives in my head rent free because the perv ji character just fits him soooo well. and that thing your ex did was super hanji coded too if he’s feeling especially confident. manifesting perv hanji everyday✨

choi minho, the man that you are. he’s also my baby, so pretty so hot and so nice😭 the greenest green flag to ever exist. i saw an article the other day bc someone accused him of being a bully in HS (and first off like wtf that man is like 30+yrs old, why you bringing up his hs life at this age). the thing is that his former classmates were like “wtf hell no, bro is obsessed with a soccer team that hasn’t one in 20 yrs, you really think he’s a bully?” 😭😂😂😂 they said that he used to get snsd autographs for his teachers and friends. literally an angel baby. also, ur minho dream, care to elaborate??👀

and frrrrr what’s up with these exes here? are you guys okay? i thankfully don’t think i ever had a situation like that with anyone, ex or not, and if i did, i def repressed it. but i always remember this situation a friend of mine was in. so she was my bestie for like all of high school (she dumped me for the church💔 my religious trauma fr) and she was in a band and one of her mates introduced her to this other guy who played guitar (conveniently, he was also really really good friends with my current bf at that time). anyways we were like 17 (my bf and i) and she was a year younger so 16. and we were just finishing our list of college applications, they saw each other randomly bc he auditioned for a band that she was in and he started texting her a lot and offering to take her to band practice (thankfully her parents were like overprotective so it never happened). mind you, he was born in 95 and she was 00. so if we were in like grade 11 or 12 he was like well into uni. so, she tells me that she’s going to this uni like three hours away from where i was going. and i’m like all happy and supportive and whatever and she’s just like “oh and _______ told me that he studies like 15minutes away from my campus so he said that i could go to his apartment and we could read comics” and i was just like 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩and i told her that that was absolutely insane and reading comics def didn’t mean reading comics. so she got kinda mad and we stopped talking about him. and like a year later (she ended up not going to that uni), i stayed at her house once and she told me that he turned out to be a super sketchy guy. and she’s always been this really really physically beautiful person like main visual fr, but soooo naive, and shit like this happed so frequently. she once told me that in middle school, she was kinda dating a guy from 12th grade so she was like 13 and he was like 17-18🚩🚩🚩 so yeah, men suck. i’m thankful to have never experienced something like that or anything but im sure that my rbf and the paranoia and resistance my parents inflicted on me in terms of men helped.

so yeah, if there’s anything that the minors that sneak into ur blog should know is: that older guy that’s talking to you is 100% an absolute creep, pls stop talking to him🙏🏻

anyways bb, i hope you have soooo much fun watching the ateez coachella streaming!!! i will be with u @ heart bc im def watching it here, last week’s was really freaking awesome.

-🐈‍⬛

WE LOVE BEDROTTINGGGG my plans for tomorrow are just to bedrot bc this week was tiring as hell and my sister’s getting sick so I have preemptively planned to stay in and sleep as much as I physically can in between writing. I am so excited ‼️‼️

PLEASE something about perv Hanji just gets me GOING my ex is fucking trash but he did the most pervy shit sometimes and I just imagine it as Hanji au now to repress the bad memories 😭 I remember we were sexting @ thanksgiving dinner one year while he was literally sitting next to his entire family and he left the table to send me videos of him taking care of himself in the backseat of his car like if that’s not SO Hanji 😭😭😭😭 PLEASE. I would melt

THE MINHO THING PWLWAASSKKEKE I SAW THAT TOO AND I WAS LAUGHING SOOO HARD CHOI MINHO IS THE GREENEST FLAG EVERRRRR NO WAY YALL WANT TO PRETEND HE WAS A BULLY 😭😭 also my dream was v short lived BUT I dreamt that he had to go to work in my place for some reason and run some of my meetings for me and so we met up so he could give me business updates and we were just sitting so close to each other and laughing and getting zero work done LMFAO I remember thing “oh my god I have to fuck this man” PLSLSLWLEKEKSMJS HE’S SO FINE……….

Oh my god that story about your friend is insane 😭 that sucks that she ended up dropping you for the church (she’s missing out on the best friendship frfr) but I hope she’s gotten a little smarter about avoiding weird guys and sorta understanding the implications of what they say :/ my sister used to work at the movies when she was like 16 and one of her coworkers was this 25 year old weirdo who snapchatted her once inviting her to “watch marvel movies together” and we were instantly like OHHHH THAT’S NOT…….

Sagely words of advice from all of us here on stayblr stay away from older men w creep vibes AND don’t pursue anything with anyone who clearly isn’t over their ex 😀😀😀😀😀😀

ALSO BBY I JUST FINISHED COACHELLA STREAMING AAAAHQHWJSMSKS THEY SOMEHOW DID EVEN BETTER THAN LAST WEEK)????? HOWWW IS THAT POSSIBLE…, ALSO “GOLDEN HOUR” NEW COMEBACK IN SUMMER????? IM SO HYPED I LOVE ATEEZ SO MUCH FUCKKKK 😭😭😭🫶🫶🫶‼️‼️

I love you baby I hope you had the bestttt day !!!!!! 💓💖💘💗

#🐈‍⬛ anon #ask

[aparticleinthewave]

Young Royals chronology

I created some chronology variations for YR, there are three major variations that happen from the start dates of classes to the first kiss so I left those three options separate, the other variations are minor and put the options together with the explanation.

[correction] As noted by @youngroyalsnshameless here there is a conversation between Henry and Walter at Wille's first dinner in Hillerska where they say that Wille's initiation party will be the next day, as we know the party takes place on a Friday so the Wille's first day at school could only be a Thursday. I made changes to the timelines.

1st Option

8/17 to 8/20 – Start of the school year in Hillerska

10/1 Thursday – Wille starts school in Hillerska (Simon tells August he's been at school for over a month. Henry and Walter talk over dinner that Wille's initiation party will be the next day)

10/2 Friday morning and afternoon – Fuck Monarchy, conversation over lunch, Simon goes to his father's house.

10/2 Friday night – Initiation party

10/3 Saturday – Wilhelm on the table (hc Simon is at school Saturday to rehearse with the choir)

10/5 Monday – Wille talks to Simon in class

10/6 Tuesday – Bro tap, Simon plays videogames with Rosh and Ayub

10/7 Wednesday morning – Wille and Simon run with the rowing team and then study together

10/7 Wednesday Night – Rosh Football Game

10/8 Thursday morning – August talks to Sara and then Simon in the library.

10/8 Thursday late afternoon/evening – Simon goes to his father's house and steals medicine

10/9 Friday morning – Rowing team practice and August speech about Simon

10/9 Friday night - First kiss

10/12 Monday – Piano scene “we should forget about that.”

10/14 Wednesday morning – Talk in gym class “I take it back.”

10/14 Wednesday Lunchtime – Simon sees the invoice for tutoring, issued 10/10/20 and due 10/21/20 (for some reason he and Sara have lunch at home that day)

10/15 Thursday – Parents lunch

10/16 Friday - Erik's death.

There are two possibilities for Erik's wake, if we keep the fall holidays at week 44 (from 10/26 to 11/1) like is in the real world, Erik's wake would have to be between 10/19 to 10/23 , (most likely 10/23 a week after his death) because we see the Hillerska students watching the funeral on TV and that means they are not on vacation yet. But if we put the fall holidays in week 45 (from 11/2 to 11/8) this gives a longer window of time for the funeral, which could be any date between 10/23 to 10/30 being most likely the 10/26, ten days after his death.

10/23 or 10/26 – Erik's Funeral

10/26 to 11/1 or 11/2 to 11/8 – Autumn holidays

11/16 Monday – Wille returns to school. (This gives him a whole month that he doesn't see or talk to Simon which is quite a while, but I believe it makes sense within their history and also shows that Erik's memorial was not just because Wille returned, but also because it's been a month since Erik’s death.

11/16 Monday afternoon – Simon goes to his father's house and steals more medicine.

11/17 Tuesday – Simon gives August the drugs to sell

11/23 Monday - Simon receives money from August, Wille tries to ignore Simon while talking to Felice.

11/23 Monday night - Simon goes to his father's house to pay him, Wille goes to meet society at 11:30 pm. (I know a lot of people put Wille's back to school and society party in the same week, but I think even August would wait a few days for Wille to readjust before dragging him to a party with alcohol and drugs and a week fits better in chronology.

11/24 Tuesday from dawn to afeternoon – Wille on the soccer field, Simon rescuing him, first time, golden morning, breakfast, lake ride (this was an emotional day)

11/28 Saturday Night – Wille at Simon's, Fish Scene

Here again we get into another date dilemma, it all depends on whether the person wants Wilmon to have spent more time together or apart. If it's more time together the society meeting and the discussion in the music room took place on 12/07 that means that Wilmon got some peace and happiness for almost two weeks, but it also means that Alex's suspension went well longer, but I believe it still makes sense it was a complex issue involving possible drug trafficking and a wealthy heir with good lawyers. But whoever is on the “misery suits you good” team, the society meeting and discussion in the music room took place sometime between 10/30 to 11/04 and that means Wilmon was separated for over a week.

12/7 or between 10/30 to 11/4 – Society meeting and discussion in the music room.

12/11 Friday – Wille throws Alex and August under the bus.

12/12 Saturday – Society lies to the director

12/13 Sunday – Santa Lucia “I just didn't want to lose you.”

12/14 Monday – The Queen goes to school, Rosh and Ayub visit Simon

12/15 Tuesday – Simon and Wille reunite “We didn't do anything wrong.” “No, we didn’t”

12/19 Saturday – Wille denies the video

12/21 Monday - Simon breaks up with Wille "I don't want to be anyone's secret", Felice finds out who made the video, Wille confronts August and discovers the Queen's betrayal.

12/22 Tuesday – “I love you” “I hope you have a nice Christmas”

2st Option

8/17 to 8/20 – Start of the school year in Hillerska

9/24 Thursday – Wille starts school in Hillerska (Simon tells August he's been at school for over a month. Henry and Walter talk over dinner that Wille's initiation party will be the next day)

9/25 Friday morning and afternoon – Fuck Monarchy, conversation over lunch, Simon goes to his father's house.

9/25 Friday night – Initiation party

9/26 Saturday – Wilhelm on the table (hc Simon is at school Saturday to rehearse with the choir)

9/28 Mondayy – Wille talks to Simon in class

9/29 Tuesday – Bro tap, Simon plays videogames with Rosh and Ayub

9/30 Wednesday morning – Wille and Simon run with the rowing team and then study together

9/30 Wednesday Night – Rosh Football Game

This is where the biggest changes happen, all the scenes after the football night until the night of the first kiss can be fitted between 10/1 to 10/9

10/! – August talks to Sara and then Simon in the library.

10/! – Simon goes to his father's house and steals medicine

10/! – Rowing team practice and August speech about Simon

10/9 Friday night - First kiss

From here onwards, the dates are the same as in the 1st option.

3st Option

8/17 to 8/20 – Start of the school year in Hillerska

9/24 Thursday – Wille starts school in Hillerska (Simon tells August he's been at school for over a month. Henry and Walter talk over dinner that Wille's initiation party will be the next day)

9/25 Friday morning and afternoon – Fuck Monarchy, conversation over lunch, Simon goes to his father's house.

9/25 Friday night – Initiation party

9/26 Saturday – Wilhelm on the table (hc Simon is at school Saturday to rehearse with the choir)

9/28 Mondayy – Wille talks to Simon in class

9/29 Tuesday – Bro tap, Simon plays videogames with Rosh and Ayub

9/30 Wednesday morning – Wille and Simon run with the rowing team and then study together

9/30 Wednesday Night – Rosh Football Game

10/1 Thursday morning – August talks to Sara and then Simon in the library.

10/1 Thursday afternoon/evening – Simon goes to his father's house and steals medicine

10/2 Friday morning – Rowing team practice and August speech about Simon

10/2 Friday night - First kiss

10/5 Monday – Piano scene “we should forget about that.”

This is where the biggest changes happen instead of taking just a few days between “we should forget about that” and “I take it back”, in this option Wille takes more than a week to change his mind.

From here onwards, the dates are the same as in the 1st option.

I'm sure there are several holes in this chronology or I forgot something, it's also good to remember that YR is a work of fiction and therefore has creative freedom. Also, English is not my first language, so sorry for the mistakes, I can't remember the last time I wrote more than two lines in English.

#young royals

[time-bone-swap-au]

Character Info: (Destiny’s Lament)

Part 2

Part 3

Bai He:

Age: ranging from 14-20 years old. Though the creator prefers that she is around 14/16 as she really does view her as a child. (No ships please)

Info: Bai He is the Reincarnation of Lady Bone Demon, after LBD splits her and MK’s soul in half, she gives one half to MK and steals MK’s half into her own, reincarnating so that the soul will be lost. Bai He takes the place as Wukong successor with the hero name ‘Lady Lily Valley’ or ‘Lady Lily’ she has all the powers of MK with a few alterations such as Soul Eyes and slight Ice Powers when building her mech.

Bai He’s biological parents wanted a son, however got a daughter instead, so by the age of 5 they abandoned her in an alley before Tang found her. Unlike MK, Bai He gets adopted by Tang, somewhat reversing the roles, she heads to Megapolis city when Tang and her move there. Both of them live in the apartment above Pigsy as long as Tang gets the job as Waiter.

Bai He is a gaming streamer, both Mei and her decided to switch content which is how she found the staff.

Bai He likes to call Tang ‘Mom’ because his voice sounds more like a mom than a dad. And because he acts more motherly than fatherly.

She also uses Tang’s scarf to wipe off glitter instead of tissues because she refuses to stain anything that is white. (Yes this has been a problem, especially during her…erm… ‘Shark Week’) Tang has only convinced her to stain pads, but has yet to convince her for anything else.

Her fashion choice consists of pink, black and white, after the events of Season 3 (now 4) she opts for more pink and blonde colors, refusing black, white and blue, at some point she even tried dying her hair pink, before finally accepting who she was and putting that behind her.

She is unaware of the changes in the timeline, until Season 3 (Now 4) when she gets confirmation of her identity as Lady Bone Demon.

Tang Shifu:

Age: Around 30-40

Info: Tang was in 2nd-year college in Japan, when he first adopted Bai He, opting to raise her despite his roommate’s protests. He dropped out in his 3rd Year despite his parents’ protests because his roommate was neglecting her needs whenever he was busy. Tang moved back to Megapolis with stolen money from his parents and never looked back, choosing to raise Bai He than to please his parents high expectations.

They met Pigsy after Tang was craving for some noodles and Tang worked at Pigsy’s for a bit before finally landing a teaching job somewhere.

Tang cares a whole lot for Bai He, even willing to run towards danger just to see her safe. The scene in the pilot completely traumatized the man and made him a little overprotective before Season 2.

Tang was aware of his shield powers prior to Season 1, he was nearly hit by a car and ended up acting on instinct, which is one of the reasons he started researching about Journey to the West.

Tang has a brother in this AU, who owns the Golden Cicada yum yums website. I won’t do name drop yet but his brother speaks like Porty MK and does actually care for Tang, which is how he moved back to Megapolis despite being in Japan.

Tang is less cowardly here, but still continues to be a freeloader. I also removed some of his ego, so in season 4 (now 3) during the training montage, Pigsy and Tang’s roles switch for a bit, except Pigsy still keeps his personality. (Being a father can do that to you, you get stress than be laidback)

FreeNoodles is canon here, but they only marry during Season 5 (FANMADE) during the Bone Bros arc. He, Pigsy and Sandy met in high-school, Sandy and Pigsy were in a biker gang and Tang was the sassy Honor Student. Pigsy and Tang broke up after Tang had to go to Japan for College.

Tang doesn’t mind being called ‘mom’ but it was certainly a problem when Bai He got lost in the city once and she asked to call her ‘mom’ that they thought Tang was trans. He wasn’t, the only thing queer about him was he was gay.

Tang wears his design inverted (Instead of Red being the dominant color, it was white) this was to prevent Bai He from using his clothes to wipe off glitter, at some point he tried Washing his scarf, but has since given up on removing the glitter and only mildly washes it. Once every week all the glitter is washed away, but the rest of the days, the glitter stays on. The Lily pin on him is not given from Bai He, it was a gift for Bai He from his brother, but Bai He doesn’t like pins so he wore it instead. The only thing given to him from Bai He is the rainbow bracelet.

‘Did you color it rainbow because you like rainbow?’

‘No because you’re gay’

‘Ah noted.’

He is unaware of the changes in the timeline.

Pigsy/Zhu Dachu

Age: Around 30-40

Info: Pigsy had just newly reopened the restaurant months after his mother’s funeral when Tang showed up with Bai He. All those feelings rushed back to him in that moment, but he played it cool.

Pigsy has a delivery boy, still yes, Bai He had a TEMPORARY crush on him but got over it after a while.

Pigsy and Bai He have an Uncle-Niece Relationship, however Bai He started shipping him with Tang. (Again instead of MK’s dad effect, it’s Uncle effect for Bai He)

Most of Pigsy and Tang’s role switch, so in the pilot it was him comforting Tang instead of Tang comforting him. However he did come with them as Tang was just as cowardly in the pilots before Bai He got a near death experience.

Pigsy is just in the background as Sandy, honestly since Tang and Pigsy switch roles at times it’s hard for me to actually add some sort of stuff for Pigsy. So his info is really short.

He still has the same personality. He and Tang broke up when Tang had to go to Japan and Pigsy had to go back to his farm. In this AU he actually has a lot of relatives, it’s just that…he hasn’t met any of them. Pigsy is also fatherless, having lived with his mother and aunt for a while.

His design doesn’t change until Season 5 (FANMADE) when he opts so wear a Red Scarf that acts like a choker. He only wears it during missions with Bai He or when he’s not in Pigsy’s Noodles. Pigsy also has his ‘Pig Demon’ form, however the reason he opts for the Smaller form and he looks less like a demon because demon kind has evolved that certain demons who don’t add human meat to their diet, don’t have certain features like a normal demon, such as colored eyes. The big form is activated only upon great strength as it actually requires a lot of human meat.

He is unaware of the changes in the timeline.

Sandy/Sha Dali

Age: The Somewhere around 30-40

Info: He’s been friends with Tang and Pigsy since High-School.

His past of violence still remains, (I am waiting for a Sandy backstory because it just MIRRORS Sha Wujing)

Also- for funsies, yes, Sandy is Sha Wujing in this AU, no reincarnation no death, nada, he is Sha Wujing, no one knows this because he’s just that good at acting that he needs a damn Oscar.

Sandy/Sha Wujing, fell in love with cats, not just for therapy, he just-

He grew soft on them.

Sandy still has his powers from his prime years, but due to his years of violence and his want to keep it from everyone that he’s Sha Wujing, he doesn’t say anything.

Why is he in high school? He needed to learn the basics of the mortal world, and libraries weren’t really helping him. (It also couldn’t help him find a job, unlike Wukong-)

He will reveal this in the Bone Brotherhood Arc.

Since MK seems close to Sandy, due to how many episodes where Mei, Sandy and MK are the focus exists, Bai He is also close to him and the other reason is because of cats.

Sandy helped Pigsy reopen the restaurant before getting into therapy.

And he’s been suffering seeing Pigsy and Tang during the first years of their relationship, having third-wheeling the whole thing for a long time and already planning their wedding to be a mash up of what Pigsy and Tang wanted their weddings to look like.

No he doesn’t feel weird that Pigsy and Tang are marrying nor dating he knows reincarnation is not the same as the past life.

He stayed in the biker gang because of Pigsy and is actually surprised how much the reincarnation differs from the both of them.

He actually wants to help Wukong, but he doesn’t want to risk his identity.

Actually knows more than he lets on, in fact I’ll make him an important character because Sandy appreciation is a go.

Sliktea might be canon.

I’ll say his new design consists of Flower Tattoos, that’s about it, nothing much really. The only one who actually frequently changes outfits is Bai He.

He is aware of the changes of the timeline.

Mei Dragon/Long Xiaojiao

Age: 23 or younger.

Info: Mei and Bai He met in an arcade.

Mei’s a stunt streamer, where she livestreams her races and her stunts.

Mei’s fans don’t believe she’s actually friends with Bai He until Season 4 (now 3)

Mei has more followers than Bai He (surprisingly)

The sole reason Bai He is even a hero in the first place.

No more Samadhi Fire, she actually learned from Red Son that having the Samadhi Fire takes half your lifespan. (Aka, she will die from sickness because it never really had a proper form to begin with)

Mei obviously doesn’t trust Wukong like in the show, but as The Bone Bros arc commences she starts to sympathize with him.

‘What’s the use of powers if you can’t use them?!’-To Ao Lie

‘What’s the point of being strong if I can’t help my friends?!’-To her, during the Bone Ore Brothers arc

Mei is also kind of into conspiracy theories.

Not into the boring history stuff and wants to skip right ahead to things.

Macaque trains her too, not sure who would teach her how to actually use a sword though.

Dragon Form is much stronger, we might get full dragon.

Not sure how to make her design yet, it’s still in the worlds (or maybe she hasn’t changed design)

Is unaware of the changes in the timeline.

Sun Wukong

Age: 5000 years old or something-

Info: In Season 1 he’s the same old mentor as always, but in Season 1 he’s actually more active as a mentor figure, in Duplicatnation, since Bai He doesn’t work in Pigsy’s shop and is doing fine as a Gamer Girl, while being sassy and setting boundaries for her schedule (Yes, Bai He is a responsible little lady) Wukong texts her her lessons (With Email of course)

Wukong goes to MBK for criticism and guidance of being a mentor, the most important advice Wukong gets is ‘Don’t let your student get into the big leagues yet if you think they can’t handle it, do it yourself if you have to’

Bai He still thinks he’s not as good as a mentor as Macaque, which is fair since Wukong’s lessons are often vague. Something he picked up from both Subodhi and Tripitaka.

Wukong gets therapy from MBK, and has been since after the Journey.

Wukong is a part of MBK’s make-shift brotherhood, called ‘The Bone Crown Brotherhood’ (I accidentally misnamed it in the artwork for ‘Accepted Fate’ ) Jin and Yin might not be in good terms with him, but he is with them.

Wukong constantly gets nightmares, which makes it so MBK would manipulate his mind and cause good dreams. This would lead to a spiral of improvement for MBK, because this allows him to trap Macaque in an endless dream, making possession a bit harder to break without spreading himself too thin.

After Season 3 (now 4) Wukong is no longer active as a mentor figure. The role was given to Macaque.

Wukong wasn’t the one who sealed DBK 500 years ago.

He won’t interact with the gang after Season 3 (now 4) and is reduced to just talking with the Bone Crown Brotherhood.

He won’t tell anyone he’s getting therapy, nor has he relayed this information.

Wukong would tell MBK about Bai He’s improvements, adventures and even events related to her, making him an unwilling informant.

Wukong was the most willing host of MBK. For some unknown reason.

Nezha and Wukong are actually on good terms in this timeline, Nezha stumbled upon MBK’s dream spell and wanted to actually talk to Wukong.

Misty or MemK has been with Wukong since the events of Season 3 (now 4) Wukong refuses to inform anyone.

Wukong actually thought Macaque was dead, seeing him betray everyone is what made him salty.

He knows how to do a lot of things, like make old time medicine and singing.

He can read and write, his eyesight is just fucked and he’s relearning modern Chinese (Guys, he’s called ‘Intelligent Stone Monkey’ for a reason)

His design is still the same as the show, when possessed he looks different (obvi) and after the events of season 3 (now 4) he wears a yellow sweater with dark red pants.

Without Glamour, Wukong has burns all over his fur and a slight wound from his head that has yet to regenerate. It was probably because the circlet was on his head for a prolonged period of time compared to his other scars.

He is unaware of the changes of the timeline, until Season 3 (now 4)

Macaque

Age: 5000 years or something (The Pokémon card isn’t canon)

Info:

Macaque didn’t die to Wukong here. He died under different circumstances and was revived by MBK for unknown reasons.

Macaque has the ability to hear the past, present and future, thus causing him to fear MBK and break his oath more early.

Prior to the series, Macaque was locked in a mountain with his name. ‘Liu’Er Mihou’ and had the one key plan to defeating MBK, which Bai He took.

The reason Jin and Yin were at the mountain where he was locked up, is because they were guarding the mountain. But once they got word of MBK’s plans, they made Bai He and Mei release Macaque.

Macaque isn’t playing villain, nor does he hold Ill will to Wukong (Because he already knows how this plays out) he just steals Bai He’s powers, because he knows that it’s a combination of LBD and MK’s powers.

Unfortunately this made him incredibly weak, as he could take Wukong’s powers, but not LBD’s so this caused him to be helpless as he was possessed.

When possessed, Macaque can see and hear anything but can’t break free, he’s been a thorn on MBK’s side for a while.

Macaque was only given brief minutes of being free from possession, however was closely monitored by the Mayor who was also possessed.

Remember this scene?

Macaque was in the basement the whole conversation.

Season 3 (now 4) served as Wukong’s replacement, slowly shifting the mentor figure from Wukong to Macaque.

Macaque was heavily tortured after Season 4 (now 3) to be more compliant to possession.

Still a theater kid, can sing.

Macaque’s design only changes in Season 3 (Now 4) and when he’s possessed. Macaque wore a red, black and white hanfu (Help I don’t know if it’s a hanfu) with a red scarf and black arm plates. With a bone headdress holding his hair up and affected his hair to he white, plus revealing his six ears. (Which surprised Peng, cause he thought ‘Six Ears’ was just a title)

He is aware of the changes in the timeline due to his ability to hear through time.

Red Son

Age: Possibly also 5000 years old, it’s hard to tell because the Samadhi Fire was split when Tang Sanzang was still around.

Info:

He’s pretty much the same, I’m only changing his design in ‘Accpeted Fate’

You know, his less screen time makes sense in this AU, cause Season 4 and Season 3 switch, which could mean they were trying to have a good time with their little truce but NOOOO, Azure just HAD to ruin their bonding moment.

Red Son learns the truth about the Fire because of the events of Season 4 (Now 3) he refused to confront his parents about it.

This is a motive for why he went in and grabbed the fire for himself, not to make himself stronger, but to take responsibility for the fire he could not control.

Additionally, instead of Red Flames, he can control its heat to be so hot that it turns blue.

Red Son’s flames come with his emotions and determine how intense those emotions are, whether he’s actually really, really angry, or really really stressed, which also causes his hair to turn blue.

Red Son has more adept control over the Samadhi Fire, having trained with regular fire his whole life.

Red Son actually has extra dialogue when the roles switch during the time he was trapped in crystal.

‘I can’t believe I’m being…useless again…I can’t even control my own Fire!’

This is when PIF and DBK start realizing how much shit they place their son into.

(Tbfh those who say Mei is annoying and shouldn’t have gotten the Fire and dragonfruit shouldn’t exist, I’ll just say this- I as a multi shipper, will say that Mei who is born with strict parents or at least implied that they only started to accept her because she suddenly was chosen by the blade of her ancient ancestor, she out of everyone would’ve RELATED to Red Son more since she had at least a similar experience with him, which is why their relationship is so impactful and so important. Because only these two would definitely relate to whatever their parents raised them to be)

Red Son actually gets more attention in the Bone Ore Brothers Arc.

He considers Nezha a brother.

Also because Nezha kind of babysat him while his mother was trying to conquer the world.

Again I won’t change his design.

Is unaware of the changes in the timeline.

Mayor/General Shi

Age: ???? Somewhere 5000??? Maybe???

Info:

Mayor wasn’t bad-shit crazy, in fact he since he was emotionally involved with MBK and got to know him as a person rather than a god, (Like the original) he didn’t go insane.

Of course MBK gave him extra power, using some souls but not enough to drive him insane, this also extended his LifeSpan.

MBK just used those same souls and used it to take control of them.

He refused to fight MBK, thinking of him as his nephew.

Mayor ran for Mayor because MBK was too busy, when MBK arrived apparently he was running against Jin and Yin.

Mayor actually adopted MBK’s last name, whatever it was, he is one of the few who actually knows MK’s real name and last name. People actually get stunned when he writes his real name on paper.

Can draw a perfect circle.

Mayor went into a state of depression when MBK died, but he was one of the fastest to accept and recover from his death. His time as General serving as a method of healing.

It still hurts though…

Mayor went through finding the Bone Bros and is actually also an uncle figure to them, it’s just that they don’t listen to him half the time.

Mayor has a pet bird.

Mayor is the only one who actually visits Wukong for his mental health, replacing MBK as Wukong’s therapist.

Mayor has since kept this a secret from anyone else.

After the events of Season 3 (Now 4) he no longer has his powers, nor his immortality, so he will die one day.

Has retired from the fighting and now acts as support, knowing necessary runes and spells in order to heal people. (Tang Sanzang and Subodhi proved that mortals can use spells)

Design is still the same except after Season 3 (Now 4) when his design slowly gravitates to the color green.

Is aware of the changes in the timeline.

Jin and Yin

(I think I’ve been color coding them wrong-)

Ages: 5000+ years old, (Possibly older than Wukong)

Info:

Due to the implications of a memory seal, the Bone Ore Brothers remember what happens in the last timeline.

As such when they heard of MBK, they decided to follow them and find out it’s MK

MK adopted them as brothers.

Jin and Yin have Celestial Realm forms and powers. They have been sealed by Lao Tzu however.

Jin and Yin regain it during the Bone Ore Brothers arc.

So yeah Lao Tzu is probably dead? Idk-

After the Bone Ore Brothers arc, Nezha becomes an honorary brother.

Jin and Yin somehow know how to control MK’s baby powers minus the Wukong related ones.

Jin and Yin only get off for community service, the sole reason is because Nezha is already dealing with Heaven since Season 4 (now 3) because Jade Emperor is dead. He doesn’t want to deal with these two.

Mayor takes full responsibility.

Designs will be explained later, I’m already getting tired-

They are aware of the changes in the timeline.

MBK/MK/Qi Xiaotian.

(Finally the main gal himself!)

Age: ????

Info:

MK was still born a stone monkey from his original timeline, HOWEVER, when LBD transported her to this new timeline, that part of history was erased but not MK. He is still a stone Monkey.

Their reincarnate however is not a stone monkey, and is in fact a monkey revived from ice.

Still has his powers even when reincarnated, the LBD part of her was just as stubborn.

MK is Genderfluid.

MBK like Bai He still retains some power he has, such as Nimbus Cloud and the ability to create clones to some extent.

His powers sometimes spark Gold.

Was completely stripped of his powers other than those two, and has to rely on LBD’s powers, which slowly corrupt him as well as his sanity of being alone for too long.

Was with Wukong the longest, in fact this is why Wukong was so easily manipulated and so easily affected by his death, they made Wukong open up so much that Wukong didn’t even consider that his one and only friend that didn’t yell at him for once was betraying him.

In the original series, the strings were being pulled by mysterious hooded figures, but MK figured out their plans early on in the season (Inspired by a theory) and decided to kill them all off, he’s the one pulling the strings, as for Season 5 plot holes, I’ve already got this covered.

[sbc-moved]

I was literally thinking about that same thing with what decade the movie was set in. Like it's a likely chance that it is in the modern day 20s (which if that is the case then with him and Luigi's age being around 24-25, they would have been born in the late 90s) and that the console and TV were probably hand-me-downs from his childhood that were well taken care of. At earliest it could be late 00s (because of Luigi's smart phone, but then again it could just be an old phone he's had for years), even then Mario is still considered an oldies fan if that is the case! :D

My face when I’m RIGHT my face when I was RIGHT I have never been wrong about a single thing in my entire life and I never will be I am on another level

Real talk as I was typing this thought out n I was sitting on the edge of my bed, 11:30 at night I was thinking ‘nobody gives a fuck you sound like a crazy person nobody cares’ so waking up and having this in my inbox I feel very. Vindicated. I feel very triumphant

Anyway. Enough of that. I’d like to think it PROBABLY takes place modern day? Like I said it seems like all technology that isn’t the bros is relatively modern and there’s seems to just be. A bit outdated. And they seem like 90s kids idk. I’m getting the vibes.

And. I’ll be so real a lot of that post was just me. Snooping around their room. I have rewatched this movie like. 50 times and I am constantly picking apart scenes the fucking. Autism monster got me. And I feel like a persons room tells you a lot about them and I need to know everything I can about Mario and it’s idk it’s fun to be able to point to the tennis racket in his room and be like ‘he probably enjoys tennis. He probably played in highschool, yap yap yap’

A lot of it was just straight up projection. I am him he is me I’m just like him fr. I see a lot of myself in this guy so when I say stuff like ‘him playing video games when he’s upset is probably a coping mechanism’ I am speaking from experience !!!!! I also have an affinity for older technology, especially old consoles- which is part of the reason I made that post in the first place. His set up in the movie is eerily similar to mine with the old blocky TV. Only difference is I have a Wii hooked up to mine lmao.

Anyway thank you for AFFIRMING me. I appreciate this boss. Enough yapping it’s 4 am I gotta go back to sleep

#ugh. I love yapping #thinking about Luigi’s busted ass phone #he’s so hot for being into older stuff btw I am in love with him #it’s sooo cool that you still play on the nes… do you wanna kiss #who said that #okay I’ll shut up now #smb movie #Mario #Luigi #♡.mail box

[cyani-ion]

Very bored at work today. Gonna write down all the June/ Juniper/Junebug ideas ive been hoarding for a year:

Born and raised by a pair of loving, hippie-dippie parents. Homeschooled until junior high.

Got a lot of freedom growing up. Thinks shes her own parent but is just a stubborn, bratty kid turned adult.

Prideful af

Lives in Japan on scholarship. Planned to get a double PHD in Bioengineering and Mathematics, prob a philosophy minor

Unfortunately she’s essentially a mad scientist that needed to be stopped lol. Lowkey evil. Cannot step within 100ft of her old campus. Is currently banned from all laboratories in Japan for “National Security Reasons” and dropped out of school because of it.

Very salty/insecure about it and in the midst of a full blown identity crisis. Stays in Japan cuz of shame (and cannot leave the country for a few months)

Haven’t told her parents yet either????…somehow???

She’s a proud rat mama. Owns about 6-8 (a few lab rats that she was given from her old internship). Either she trained them secretly to communicate with her, lets them free roam to get gossip around the neighborhood. Or she just tells people that to freak em out. Will decide later 👍🏾

Keeps a “people profile” in her satchel. Since the “accident” she’s taken up people watching and life drawing. Lots of colorful characters where she lives shes gotta sketch and take notes on them.

Loves a planner, loves a list, loves having shit to do. Hates doing nothing or wasting the day.

Works the graveyard shift at a greasy love hotel. I think the bois try to ask for advice at one point but she is of no help since she doesn't know shit herself.

She has and will cry over some good noodle soup

Eyesight is garbage/20. Her childhood glasses made her look like an owl.

A fantastic eavesdropper

Loves the punk/goth scene so much, but is too nervous to try it.

On that note, i like to think in another universe, she’d be good friends with and/or date that punk dude that told the bros to stfu in the bing bong ep (s2ep21) (wiki says he’s gangster i guess 🤷🏾‍♀️)

She is fascinated by and terrified of Dayon

She’s a miser. Big ol’ cheapskate

LOVES a cappella (begs the boys to do it every once in a while when tipsy)

Talks to herself and her rats.

At one sad, sad point in her life was sapiosexual (it was earlier than you’d expect)

Her granny knits colorful pairs of socks for her birthday every year and ships them to her. Wears them all the time when its cold.

Geniunely enjoys helping people solve things. Would be a excellent teacher / life coach if she didn't hate children and young adults

She’s probably older than the Matsus by about 5 years so she’s prob in her early to mid 30s

Fancy sex toy collector.

Cardigan enjoyer

Homesick af

Allergic to cats (and prob Ichi)

No tolerance for alcohol. Is out like a light after one drink.

Fell out of a tree as a kid and has a metal kneecap that can pick up radio signals.

She still loves climbing trees. And stargazing. Reminds her of home…

Can’t run for shit.

Very big “I like you.❤️”, “👁️👄👁️…why???” energy

Googles everything before asking for help

Apartment layout makes sense only to her and her rat pack. Do with that what you will

Misses sleeping in the campus library 😭

Met Chibita first before everybody else. Gets oden for an early breakfast before he closes. and considers him a friend. Doesn’t really hang out with the Matsus too much outside of the stand.

Favorite Holiday: New Years Eve

Favorite Season: Winter

Favorite Foods: SOUP and gyudon

Favorite Drinks: Iced Coffee and Spiced Rum

Favorite Genre of Movie: Musicals from the 50’s-60’s

Favorite Color: Blue Grey / Magenta

Favorite Animal: Polar Bears

Favorite Matsu: Jyush - First ever crush and she doesn’t know what to do with that info. Obsessed. Thinks his defying physics thing is real neat. Very stressful and confusing thing for her, but loves spending time with him when she can.

Least Favorite Matsu: Oso - the most fun they have is tossing insults and annoying the shit out of each other. Though they sometimes seek eatch other out for real shit life advice from time to time. Also he owes her like $20 and its been a month and she’s brandishing a crowbar as I type this.

#osomatsu san #osomatsu san oc #its june! #No more hiding oc lore in 2024 #She’s been collecting dust #also im so sorry this became a masterlist its been a very slow day at work today weh #for use later

[lexi-the-demon-69]

Nah what in tarnations goin on with the anti-LicoPom shippers these days

Personally I don’t ship those two, but I wouldn’t call myself an anti-LicoPom person. my personal hcs of the two just wouldn’t make the ship work, but ya don’t see me lunging at somebody full speed right at the jugular because they ship the two

Who in their right mind comes after someone bc they ship two adult characters? (that aren’t related to each other, mind you) (Side note: Going by the idea that Licorice is in his 20s and Pomegranate is in her 30s, why would an age gap be wrong, if they are both adults? My parents are literally 11 years apart💀)

I dont think either characters are absolute saints. They’re cookies of darkness, for crying out loud! Of course they’re not gonna be amazing people,,, or cookies?

Like if that one anon wanted to discuss why they disagreed with a ship, sure whatever, but when it turns to name-calling and pointing fingies? That immediately ruins the argument.

Anyway point of what im yapping on about is that people who ship stuff gotta be less passive-aggressive towards others when they disagree with other people’s ships/opinions. Like we’re all apart of the same fandom, can’t we all just get along and set different opinions aside? Or is there something I’m just not getting?

One thing I will never understand is ship discourse. My brain has too many debuffs lmao

Hope you have a nice day, your blog and art look very nice! 😄💕

I honestly have to agree! Coming after and attacking me for liking a ship, instead of having a nice conversation with me, is stupid. Hell, I've had a better conversation with a ChocoMilk shipper and I hate that ship. (You know who you are and thanks for explaining your side of the story!) I am more than willing to have someone explain why they don't ship the things I do, as long as they're nice and civil about it. But, if you're gonna call me names and attack me as a person, then I'm going to pull your pants down and spank you with my opinions on why you're wrong.

One thing I forgot to mention is this: Pomegranate showing interest in Dark Enchantress doesn't mean LicoPom can't work. Besides, Pome x Dark Enchantress is more disgusting than LicoPom because that genuinely seems toxic and illegal.

Pome x Dark Enchantress is a toxic ship because there's obviously a power imbalance and you cannot tell me that Dark Enchantress wouldn't manipulate or ab*se Pome in that relationship if she did something wrong. Pome is a devoted follower of Dark Enchantress and, just like all of the other members (except Dark Choco) holds her in such high regard that they will do ANYTHING for her. Just goes to show how fucking hypocritical that anon is and how dumb Antis can be sometimes.

I have unfortunately dealt with antis before (if you've known me since my Henry Stickmin days, then you'll know.) and the best way to deal with them is to spank them with their own argument and block them.

I honestly don't get ship discourse either bro. None of this is real. It's a fictional relationship where I can project myself onto a character who will more than likely think I'm a weirdo.

Also, glad you like my art! I hope you enjoy your stay!

[8bitbobby]

Co-op with Coop

On April 1st, I had a visit with the benefactor of my longest friendship Mark Cooper or “Coop” as I called him back in the day. It was April Fools, but this is not a prank and the only fool was me for not snapping a picture to mark the occasion.  Coop and I met sometime around 1979 on the neighborhood streets of what was then called Lakeview Heights.  Growing up in the late 70s and early 80s was one of those amazing times that, looking back on it, I feel so fortunate to have been a part of.  Our upbringing in those days has become solidified in modern pop culture by way of memes, pictures and stories from those who survived that time.  Depictions of kids jumping their BMX bikes over a rickety, hand-made ramp while 6 or 7 hapless friends lay prone beside the warped, plywood slope-- like decommissioned school busses in an Evil Knievel motorcycle stunt-- resonate with our generation on a deep level.  How about the memories of what water tasted like coming out of a garden hose and the reminder to let the water run for a good 30 seconds on a hot day or else you got a mouthful of 90 degree plastic hose-flavored H2O? Mark lived one street over from me in those days and the shenanigans we found ourselves in never ended. We honestly didn’t stop from sun up to sun down (except for the occasional dinner bell or call of nature).  All the kids in the neighborhood had each other’s phone numbers memorized back then there were no smartphone contact pages.  The prefix was all the same and Mark’s # and mine were only 14 numbers apart. His number ended in 5-7-1-1 and mine in 5-7-2-5 and it wasn’t uncommon in those days to know your best friend’s number better than your own. From street hockey matches with anyone that walked by and wanted to join mid-game, to playing tag and kick-the-can in each other’s yards, knocking the pickets out of our fences when we used them as make-shift soccer nets, to pranking unsuspecting families with nicky nicky nine doors and running onto the road and mooning oncoming cars -- there was never a lack of crazy things for a bunch of 6-10 year olds to do back in those days.  We would ride our bikes everywhere we could and usually that was to the local corner store, Grant’s Market, or a little further down the road to the laundromat or video store.  Westside Video Classics was THE place to rent all the latest movies and games back in the day.  

If it wasn’t movies or wrestling, Coop and I bonded over hockey cards (playing scramble,  knock-downs and closeys), making comedy tapes on our cassette recorders (we thought we were a regular Bob & Doug McKenzie duo) and later on playing video games.  At my house I introduced him to the two full-sized arcade machines my dad had bought from a co-worker and put in our rumpus room as he liked to call it:  Super Soccer and Wild Cycle and then later games like Raid on Isram and Cosmic Cruncher on the Commodore Vic-20.  

At his house we played endless rounds of Ring King and Super Mario Bros. 2 on his NES as well as countless hours of board games like Crokinole, Rummoli and Crossbows & Catapults. We had the definitive 80s childhood: trick-or-treating together in our shared neighborhood for years at Halloween time, sleepovers almost every other weekend, birthday parties and endless summer nights of hi-jinx.  We shared in common younger siblings that tried to do everything we did at that time and rivalries with our respective kin that gave us even more to relate to.  Sometime in the early 80s, Coop tattooed the drywall on his bedroom wall, in permanent marker no less, with the inscription:  Best Friend Bobby since 1980.  An homage to a friendship that, at that time, was a few years on but looking back now has been a friendship that has endured nearly 45 years.   To take a page out of his playbook, I mocked my 7up sign to display the following:

I am getting away from my story. All of this to say that Mark came by to meet the family and check out my game room, but became quickly overwhelmed with it all.  He was audibly giggling from the moment I greeted him at the front door to the moment we made our way down to the ‘Arcade’ and then back up to the kitchen to sit and catch up.  His energy was infectious and I knew that we would likely not be doing a lot of gaming on this visit but rather getting reacquainted and spinning shared experiences from those good old neighborhood days.  

Fast forward a week and we got together again and this time we ended up spending a good hour re-living some of those nostalgic times down @ 8bit Bobby’s.  Coop’s one pre-visit request was that he wanted to play some Raid on Isram.  To make this possible, I had to hunt through various backups to find my rom files for the Vic-20 and then figure out how to interface it with my current Hyperspin setup on my M.A.M.E. Arcade machine.  After some tweaking I managed to get it setup and somewhat playable.  The game itself is nothing earth shattering and is essentially a watered-down clone of the popular game Scramble, but, to a couple of 40 somethings reliving the times when they were likely in the 10 and under category, it was pretty neat to play again.  The object of the game is literally survival. You shoot a laser cannon and drop bombs on enemy ground-to-air missiles and fuel refineries. It starts out scrolling left to right in a pretty wide open playfield but as the game wears on the air-to-ground missiles begin taking off and you begin to enter narrow tunnels with what can only be described as flying spiders coming at you.  You can shoot off the stalactites that make the caves a tight squeeze but if you are too busy contending with them you are sure to get hit by the unpredictable and weird trajectory of these squiggle-like arachnid creatures.  Raid on Isram is a “one and done” game meaning you have one life to get as far as you can and then that’s it.  No extra lives, no continues, nothing. THIS was the epitome of gaming back in the days before infinite lives, cheat codes and save states were a thing.  

From here we moved on to some co-op games starting with Golden Axe.  We got swiftly through the first two stages cracking heads and laying the boots to the little magic-stealing gnomes that appear between checkpoints only to have the game freeze without warning.  I have played through several of these games and never had this happen before. It was a definite headscratcher but we were undeterred.  We continued our co-operative game play with the Midway classic, Rampage.  Just like back in the old days when we used to stomp around the neighborhood, we joined forces to destroy buildings, smash tanks and defeat digitized army men as George and Ralph the giant, Kong-like Ape and Wolfman respectively.  We played through 19 “days” or cities and after each one we wondered how long the game went on for.  After a quick Wikipedia search it would appear that the game has 128 days that, when completed, repeat 5 more times. It was good to know that this was a game we were not likely to finish in one sitting. Maybe a future stream event or something?  Pictured below are our two protagonists: Coop & Bobby and in true fashion I am showing my age and lack of tech savviness by being unsure as to where I am supposed to be looking at the camera. I suppose a goofy picture is better than no picture at all.

This game room of mine and friends like Coop remind me how much of a role nostalgia plays in my life.  The way certain sights or sounds can just transport a person back in time.  I know we are not the same kids who hid in the willow trees on the neighbor’s property, cut through a field and hopped a fence into each others’ backyards with the ease and agility of an Olympic vaulter, and had water balloon fights while eating home-made popsicles to beat the summer heat, but for the hour or so that we connected tonight, we were transported back to a much simpler time. I leave you with the meme pasted below (which came up in conversation during his visit and I think really hits in the gut). Even though we can’t go back to that moment and give it the recognition and closure it deserved we can at least reminisce about what it was like just hanging out and teaming up against whatever was out there.  Co-op with Coop 4 EVA.  

#nostalgia #retro #80s #childhood #bmx #games #boardgames #arcade #friends #1980s #videogames #gamersunite #flashback #throwback #memes

[youdontneedtoreadthis40]

I had a friend with whom I had like the craziest 3 am convos, now we're drifting apart so I'm gonna like document some of that weirdness, some jokes

1. Universe was created last Thursday

2. Peppa pig is 2m tall

3. I classify my memories by places, not time. Time isn't linear it's geographical

4. Ego finished before it could fester, the universe doesn't allow me

5. From the depths of Mushroom kingdom, emerges a man with a moustache so long

He's got a plan, he's got a scheme

Warrior, wario the money making Machine!

6. Will he cry, a broken man for all he has lost? Will they live or will they roam about with their hearts dead and brains shrieking?

7. Never be vanilla. Always be so extra and dramatic that you put Ursula to shame

8. We could just be immortal sentient jellybishes, floating in the ocean all day, but nooo

9. Rodrick from the live action movie is way too fine

10. A: I don't have friends

B: wait what about m- (starts fading away)

11. Confused OONGA BOONGA intensifies

12. I want to pour mouthwash on my eyes

13. A: Haha you're so old.

B: old, ancient, a dinosaur, even.

14. I pity myself, an eternal doormat who keeps trying to help people despite being ignored by them.

I'm a beta male, sonic

15. A: hey come onliiine

B:Who dares summon me, The Great Naga, king of the serpentssssssss

16. I broke into a children's park to play on the swings, I'm a criminal

17. Without even a semblance of awareness of any conciousness

18. Never feel guilty for eating chocolate

Feel guilty for being alive instead!

19. Thanks bro, you keep me undergrounded

20. After everything that has happened, if I don't get in my favourite college, I'm gonna be so pissed off that even the Gods will worry. The simulated Matrix should be sweating rn. They better not distract me.

21. I forget I'm alive sometimes

22. How can I sleep when the world is briefly magical for a moment which seperates the days? ✨

23. Haha suffer peasant

24. A: i grow, not grow up

Cosine so fine Constantine

Always alone, post Malone, Sylvester Stallone

All these rich people always act they busy

All I ever want in my life is pu-

I'm sorry, I got carried away, i don't where that came from

But like there's so much symbolism in this ryt, socioeconomic disparity, immaturity and-

B: Yea the pussy is a metaphor for how you were in a dark cave in your life

25. Mongolian throat singing ensues

26. Let's lie back and stare at the stars as last of the lights are put out

27. Mike wazhousekey

28. Ye have been blessed, kill some people in your dreams

29. I wanna die while somersaulting into the mouths of sharks in a lava pit volcano

30. A: my neck hurts so bad

B: want me to break it

31. Why am I like this?

When did I become like this?

32. You can feel the 12 year old girl energy from the screen

All my friends have personality of a toddler

33. Being buff and anxious is wayy better than being anxious

34. You're one sarcastic and a pleasant funny chap good sir

A hoit a toit

35. The theological conclusion to an eternal saga

36. And her skin the colour of coffee but only with milk because she was white (talking about how there were little coloured people in standards of beauty thing)

37. Atleast you try, my beloved

38. A: do my laundry

B: here have monekys

A: ...

B: special helicopter swings for shirts too

39. That attention seeking, two timing bubonic barnacle rat

40. There is no gender

There is only cockroach and those too filled with fear to face it

Anyways they have their own whole life and they seem happier without me so Saying goodbye i suppose haha sed lyf