#5lazarus

[5lazarus]

hollow me out my cup overflowing body carved karst inside, ever the blood sinks electric like another god's waterfall outlined, contained, uncut skin pliable muscle unbreaking I unfray city beach the only lightshow I need

#poetry #writing #personal #5lazarus

[dreadfutures]

“Reading a book together” for whoever you like!

For @dadrunkwriting !

Rating: G

Pairing: Ixchel Lavellan & Solas (#broken mirrors)

Words: 508

Ixchel and Solas hiding out somewhere in rural Orlais. Reference to @5lazarus | @hes5thlazarus's Fen'Harel's Teeth because I adore their fic. And the aphorisms are from Poor Richard's Almanac by Benjamin Franklin!

-:-:-

"Ixchel."

Her head snapped around to face Solas, who was not looking at her. He had spoken in such a hushed tone that she would not have heard it, if she had not been listening so attentively at the shuttered window for any sign of an intruder outside.

"Stop pacing."

She stared at him with narrowed eyes.

He raised one hand, apparently confident of her attention, and beckoned her closer. She begrudgingly obeyed and lowered herself silently onto the moldering mattress beside him.

"What are you reading?" she asked under her breath.

"The local almanac," he replied. "I have found them to be worthwhile, if only for the insights they provide into the region's psyche. Have you ever read one?"

Ixchel shook her head. Reading had been difficult for her in the first several years of the Inquisition, and by the time she had grown proficient, most of the material that crossed her path were reports, manifestos, and correspondence and diaries useful only for the secrets they contained. None of them were particularly entertaining diversions.

"They collect the calendar, weather predictions for the coming season and comparisons to previous records, celestial information, and even poems and witticisms and wisdom," Solas explained softly. "This one contains a particular bounty of proverbs."

Solas put his arm around her shoulders and settled the little booklet in his lap, his right hand splayed across the page, pointer finger directing her attention to a specific paragraph.

"'Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead,'" Solas read aloud, and Ixchel snorted.

"Must be an Orlesian."

"Perhaps," Solas said with a chuckle. "It says something about the writer, the publishing house, and the mood of the locals with regard to what's happening to their country. I read one published before the Conclave that said, in a margin: 'The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason.' An interesting inclusion, in the face of roaming bands of Templars. It is not a manifesto by any means, nor an expression of solidarity or sympathy—it was simply an anonymous aphorism given to the population of a small Orlesian backwater."

"Are they anonymous to the locals?" Ixchel wondered. "To own a printing press and source all this academic information—"

"It is not necessarily academic, to write down the oral history of the regions harvests." Solas shrugged his shoulder, lifting Ixchel slightly before settling back and resting his cheek on her hair. "Not all are printed so professionally. And you would be surprised how easy it can be to hide a small printing press in a basement."

A long, soft breath escaped him, and she felt his smile against her hair. "There is a woman in Val Royeaux's alienage who publishes a revolutionary magazine called 'Fen'Harel's Teeth.' She and her writers are some of Orlais' most wanted dissidents, but have yet to be found."

Ixchel raised an eyebrow and reached to turn the page of the almanac in his lap.

"No relation, I trust."

"No," he admitted. "But I am honored nonetheless."

#da drunk writing circle #solavellan #ixchel lavellan #solas #broken mirrors

[potatowitch]

fic author self rec

Thank you for the tag, @noire-pandora!

When you get this, reply with your favourite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love.

This is in no particular order, and very Anders-centric lmao

1. loved, lost, loved again (Anders/Fenris, Anders/Justice/Fenris, past Anders/Karl, past Anders/Nathaniel)

Rating: Mature

Length: 3055

Summary: Anders remembers some kisses more than others.

2. writhe (Anders/Justice)

Rating: Explicit

Length: 2374

Summary: Anders didn't expect "sex in the Fade" to involve a writhing mass of spirit tentacles - but he's absolutely not complaining.

3. and still, I will live here (Anders/Fenris, Anders/Justice/Fenris)

Rating: Teen

Length: 1149

Summary: After he and Justice lose control inside Corypheus' prison, Anders is convinced he has well and truly become a monster. Fenris reassures him that that's not the case.

4. o creator, see me kneel (Anders/Fenris)

Rating: Explicit

Length: 1448

Summary: Anders has Fenris fuck his face in a Chantry storeroom. That's it, that's the fic. For DADWC and biblioteknician: "what a pretty little disaster you will be".

5. gaunt hands, full moon (Anders/Fenris)

Rating: Teen

Length: 1399

Summary: In the middle of the night, Anders finds Fenris by a broken window in the mansion, remembering.

Tag list under the cut:

Tagging (as always, no pressure and let me know if you’d like me not to tag you in things like this!): @5lazarus @barbex @lesetoilesfous @swagalicioussquids @dismalzelenka @pinkfadespirit @blarrghe @waterkelpies @notebooks-and-laptops @rosella-writes @tea42

[musetta3]

for the hurt/comfort list! “Can you please come and get me?”

Hi @5lazarus! I present to you a FenHawke prompt. I wrote it so Hawke could be whichever Hawke you choose. Hope you enjoy!! <3 

This…wasn’t the way home? Fenris peered down the shadowy alley, trepidation setting in. He’d followed the directions Hawke had given him—they were right there, in the Notes of his phone. Left out the door, pass three intersections, a left, and then a right. He used those directions every day, and had memorized them. Fenris knew what was he was doing, why did the street look so different tonight? He stuffed the panic down.

“Alright,” he said, looking down the street, “let’s be rational. Retrace your steps.” He turned around and headed back the way he came. “If I turned right, then I should turn left, and then—” He stopped on some street, eyes wide. Despite his best efforts, everything got jumbled; even after looking at the directions in his Notes app, he was confused. Venhedis, he did this every day, why was this so hard?

‘You’re going mad,’ the voice in his head hissed, ‘the lyrium’s leaching; won’t be long until you forget everything, and Hawke will leave you—’ the brands flickered through his leather jacket, blue light weak against the brickwork.

“Stop,” he said, breath shallowing. “S-Stop it, I’m not listening.” 

There was truth to those words, he knew, an ugly truth. The brands were leaching, albeit slowly, the doctors said. They were doing all they could, going from specialist to specialist—Fenris’s pill boxes were filled from all the medications they prescribed for lyrium poisoning—but if they couldn’t find some way to stop the leaching soon, he’d end up in a retirement home for Templars… Those homes where the Chantry sent the useless, witless ones to eke out an existence before they forgot everything and death finally took them. And Fenris would join them. Fenris Hawke: thirty-something years old, author still in his prime, forgetting who he was and how to eat or drink. The thought terrified him.

‘You weren’t this bad before, you know. It’s getting worse,’ the voice said. ‘Only a matter of time—’

“Shut up!” Fenris held his head in his hands, his shout bouncing off the walls. An apartment window flew open above, a stream of expletives and demands for quiet floating down to him. A police siren wailed in the distance; Fenris looked around, heart pounding so hard, it made his head clench, took his breath away. He fumbled with his iPhone, trembling hands pressing the home button repeatedly in his panic. Siri pinged into existence, waiting for a request.

“C-Call Hawke,” he said, voice cracking.

“Do you mean ‘Colin Dock?’” she asked, once again not understanding his accent. Fenris bit back his frustration; he hated voice recognition software with a passion; it never worked for him.

 “Hawke. Call Hawke,” he said, voice going sharp. He huddled against a wrought iron fence, wondering where in the Void he was. The autumn wind blew right through his jacket; he shivered, and not just from the cold.

“Sorry, I don’t understand ‘colic’—”

“Fasta vass, you piece of kaffas,” he exclaimed. The world went blurry; Fenris wiped his eyes and raked his hand through his hair. A sob escaped; he slid down the fence to the sidewalk below. The concrete sucked the heat out of him, leaving him cold and hollow. He felt even more desolate. 

“Come on, get a hold of yourself,” he whispered, “one step at a time.” He tapped the Notes app, scrolling through entries “It’s here, I know it’s here…” He pulled up the document with the directions home and tapped the phone number. He was beyond grateful when he heard the dial tone. “Pick up,” he whispered. “Please, please, please, please—”

“Hullo?” Much to his dismay, the tears started again from sheer relief.

“Fenris? Fenris, are you alright?” Hawke asked, voice alarmed. “...Are you crying?”

“I—” How could he even voice his shame, that he was no better than a child? “C-Can you please come and get me?” he asked. “Hawke? H-Hawke, please—” There was a faint jingle on the other end, from what he assumed were keys.

“On my way. Where are you?” There it was, The very question he would’ve given anything for an answer to. Fenris’s breath hitched.

“I don’t know. I-I don’t know where I am—” His voice pitched, words tripping over themselves on the way out.

“Fenris, can you do something for me? Go to the nearest intersection and tell me the street names.” Solutions, Fenris liked those. He brushed himself off and jumped to his feet, hurrying towards the end of the block. The street names swayed on the traffic light wires; Fenris stared, letters scrambling into nonsensical lines and patterns before him.

“I can’t read this,” he said. “I-I can’t, Hawke. It’s not Tevene, I can’t do this—”

“Darling, remember what I said at the night school, hmm? When you’d just arrived in Kirkwall, and were learning to read Common?”

“‘One letter at a time,’” he whispered.

“That’s right. You can do this.” Fenris took a deep breath and concentrated.

“‘H-A-R-L-M?’”

“Harimann. Harimann and what?” Upon closer investigation, they determined he was on the corner of Harimann and DuPris, not too far removed from his route home. 

“Tell me about your day at work,” Hawke said, no doubt to distract him. “Was the paper busy?” The panic still scrabbled for purchase inside Fenris; it clawed at him before eventually ebbing away, leaving him exhausted.

“I-I wrote an article on Dwarven lichen bread today,” Fenris replied, sheltering against the wind in a doorway. “They brought some in for us to review. New flavor or something.”

“Ooh, from the TV commercial! ‘Fine dwarven crafts, direct from Orzammar: from our noble kitchens to yours, find us in your local bread aisle.’” Fenris laughed, wiping his tearstained face; Hawke always made the best impersonations of cheesy TV commercials. It was almost uncanny, how spot-on they were.

“That’s the one. Cinnamon swirl flavor,” he said, shivering.

“How was it? I’ve been curious.”

“Lichen-y.”

Hawke scoffed. “‘Lichen-y.’ Varric Tethras must have been desperate to hire the likes of you.” Hawke’s voice seemed louder, clearer. Fenris poked his head around the corner. He saw no one approaching in either direction.

“Behind you,” Hawke said with a laugh, “your escort has arrived, messere.” Fenris turned around, disconnecting the call. Hawke stood before him, coat over flannel pajamas and hair tied in a messy bun. Utterly glorious, in Fenris’s eyes. He held Hawke in the fiercest embrace he could muster.

“Thank you,” he whispered. “T-Thank you so much.” Hawke patted him on the back.

“One friendly neighborhood Hawke, at your service. I’ll send you my bill, at the end of the month.” Hawke grinned. “Come on, I need to get my husband home.”

‘Husband’ was still such a new, beautiful term, one Fenris never tired from hearing. It made his heart smile in the most joyful manner imaginable. He linked his arm in Hawke’s and walked home to their apartment, where Toby the Mabari greeted him with many ‘aroos’ and tail wags.

“Go wash up,” Hawke said, “dinner’s in the Crockpot.”

Fenris must have been colder than he realized, if the water burned and made his limbs ache. He changed into the warmest pajamas he owned and slid into his seat at the table. A bowl of mutton stew appeared before him. It was good, he decided. Not the curries he was used to from Minrathous, but warm and comforting, all the same. Between the warm food and the soothing cadence of Hawke’s voice, he melted into his chair.

“Fen,” Hawke called, “go to bed.” The spoon clattered out of Fenris’s hand, his head snapped back.

“But I haven’t seen you all day,” he protested, eyes unable to stay open.

 “You’re not seeing much except the inside of your eyelids, messere, go on.” Fenris grumbled, pecking his beloved on the cheek before crawling into bed. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow.

Sometime during the night—he wasn’t sure when without his glasses—he felt the mattress dip as Hawke laid down beside him. Fenris smiled into his pillow, pretending to be asleep.

“I won’t give up, Fen,” Hawke whispered. “I’ll find a specialist that can remove the brands, so you’ll never be afraid like that again. I swear it. I don’t care if I have to fly someone in from Tevinter and sell a kidney to pay for the surgery; I won’t give up on you.” 

Fenris cherished those words and held them close in his heart. Even if the future was uncertain, at least he had someone to meet it with. Words failed to express just how grateful he was for that.

#writing prompt #hurt-comfort #hurt/comfort #fenris x hawke #fenhawke #dragon age hawke #modern dragon age #5lazarus #musetta answers #my fanfiction #fenris #musetta writes

[errata98]

Fanfiction I Read in 2020 

I didn’t realize how long this post was going to be until I was about halfway through. And it still is not even close to exhaustive. 

Soo, while 2020 has been such a tumultuous year one great thing about this time in my life is that I’ve had more time than ever to read. I am always so blown away by how much talent there is in fanfiction, so big, big thank you to all the writers that share their work and for whisking me away from real life into something far more pleasurable. It definitely makes my whole day when a fic I love has been updated, and I enjoy catching glimpses of rough drafts and the writing process via tumblr (I’m still trying to understand how their galaxy brains even work lolol). 

It’s long, but I am not putting it under a cut! They’re too good!

Long Fics (>= 50k words)

Roses From Where Thorns Grow by @bdafic​ [incomplete]- I started this a while ago, must have lost track of it, and then found it again this summer. Feels weird to type because this is not really me irl lol but accidental pregnancy fics are one of my favorites kinds of fics. Papa Solas is amazing. Somewhere, I once tagged something with ‘solas dad best dad’ and I think that probably sums up my feelings on the matter. The last chapter I read has left me anxious for more, so I’m eagerly awaiting what will likely be the first chapter posted in 2021. 

Ruins by @luzial [incomplete] - A real story of a couple who broke up, fought each other for twenty years, got sent back in time, and are now trying to make things work again ;) Lavellan here is older and wiser in all the ways that matter, and Solas is... well Solas in many ways is everything we wish he would (and could) be now. Had the most wonderful realization that I somehow missed the last chapter that apparently came out on my birthday, so I know what I’ll be doing later.

Fen’Harel’s Teeth by @5lazarus​  [incomplete] - the conversations in this fic are one of my favorite parts. They’re in character, but they’re also just interesting to read. The words just fly across the page -- it’s smooth, seamless, pithy. I love politics and I love a main character who has her wits about her -- both are in this fic. Also features fatherly!Solas, which I just adore.

By the Still Waters by [orphan account]. This is older, but I knew it was popular so I gave it a shot and... yes, I understand now. I loved reading something from Fenris’ perspective. I loved how he’s a foil for Solas. I love seeing Lavellan as this near mythical person because we see everything through Fenris’ eyes. I love Hawke and Fenris together. Merrill also featured more heavily than I anticipated and she had some of the best lines I’ve ever read.

Pressure Point by 17734 [incomplete] - this fic leaves me constantly unsettled (in the best, most addictive, under-your-skin kind of way). I’ve read the first 18 or so chapters twice, and it’s one of those stories that’s slightly different the second time you read it. I really like the author’s take on immortal beings, some of it is very reminiscent of some of the Greek mythology I read in school - characters are at turns both magnificent and terrifying. The language is also very beautiful, and I’m a sucker for anything close to prosaic. 

Out of Time by destinies - so, I don’t know how I found this beyond just “Twitter.” This isn’t Dragon Age related -- it’s from The Greisha Trilogy, which I had never heard of before -- something just told me I would really like this story. Forced/political marriages’, memory loss, enemies to lovers, the dichotomy between light and dark embodied by a single couple... yes, thank you. I had to kind of piece the world together as I read, which was admittedly a lot of fun, and um... wow, I really loved this! Another one of my ‘binged in a single night’ fics.  

Message Sent by @aicosu [incomplete]- this is coincidentally how I got my former partner into Dragon Age lol. I had originally read it the first time as it was coming out. The second time I read it aloud to them over the course of a few days, feeling very much like Cassandra trying to do certain character’s voices. It reminded me of how much I loved it, and so I feel like it deserves a mention here. Definitely an unorthodox but memorable way of cursing someone with being emotionally invested in the Solavellan romance 

Short Fics (< 50k words)

nothing on my tongue by @ellstersmash - the chapters here are short, and I loved seeing the fic updated put of order. This was my first time experiencing that, and I loved guessing where we were in the in-game timeline, and also, as more chapters were posted, which chapter numbers were still missing and therefore what the missing chapters might be about. I associate this fic with feeling kind of melancholy a lot. I think the word constraints really lent itself well to the Solavallen romance -- beautiful and poignant, but always leaving me wanting more.

In and Out of Time Again by @luzial - hoo boy did I have a fun time reading this one. I actually rarely go for AU’s this “AU”, but I trusted this author, and it paid off. In fact, I think I subconsciously had more doubts than I thought because what started a curious perusal ended in one of those “up until 3 am reading” kind of nights. It was such a fast-paced, interesting read, I couldn’t wait to see what happened next. Ink is one of my favorite Lavellans; she’s just too cool.

The Fourth Day by sass_bot (@knightava) [incomplete] - this was just such a perfect example of how to build tension and dread for the reader, that I still think about it frequently. Also, who wouldn’t love a Skyhold murder mystery?

Beyond the Veil by Pyreite [incomplete] - A 200 years post-Veil fic. Abelas is in it, which is how I knew it was gonna be good hehe. I really like the world-building, and I like explorations of the romance with a more hardened Lavellan. 

I Come to You With Nothing by CommonEvilMasterMind. I’ll preface this by writing that this made me cry with a mixture of sorrow and happiness. The premise is an undercover mission in an alienage which involves Solas and Ellana masquerading as a married couple. It’s beautifully written, and just honestly kind of bittersweet. The writing is itself very touching but I also think it’s almost difficult to read because the Solavellan romance has an arc that looks like it’s just exponentially deviating from anything remotely happy lolol 

That Girl Is Like A Sunburn by @yourstrulycommandershepard - I just discovered this person’s writing this year and I’m kind of obsessed? I went on a whole binge this past summer and *fans self*. I picked this one for my list because I haven’t read that many Solas/Trevelyan fics, and hers are by far some of my favorites. I also love that the titles of some of her fics are Taylor Swift lyrics. I get Solavellan vibes from so many of Taylor’s songs - glad it’s not just me!

Aravel by @playwithdinos - More Papa Solas. I can’t say anything more than it hit me right in the vhenan. 

Wake Up by queenofkadara (@pikapeppa) - One of those fics I thought about for days afterward. The characterization was incredible, and it hurt me to read about Varric brining up Lavellan and seeing Solas’ reaction, and it hurt even more to be left wanting for more, just like Solas. 

#2020 #dragon age fanfiction #mostly #solavellan fanfiction #2020 masterpost #maybe this time next year it wont take me 2 hours to make my 2021 masterpost #the power of tagging #bdafic #luzial #5lazarus #17734 #aicosu #ellstersmash #knightava #pyreite #commonevilmastermind #yourstrulycommandershephard #playwithdinos #pikapeppa

[hollyand-writes]

thanks for your post on the history of fandom wank. I'd come in expecting more anders content and have been disappointed and now I know why. little bit worried about the inevitable backlash--I ship fenris/anders!, and a trio came off anon and threatened me right before the first fandom wank wave of 2020--but it is what it is. appreciate what you're doing to make fandom a more transparent and healthier/safer space. do you have any advice about installing trackers and all that?

Hey there 5lazarus! Thanks so much for sending in this ask ❤️  Man, I’ve had several people say this to me today -- that they came into Dragon Age fandom expecting more Anders content and wondering where it is, or why so many Anders post links were broken or blogs deleted or abandoned. 

It’s so weird to think that when I was lurking in Dragon Age 2 fandom in 2011 and 2012 (I joined Tumblr DA fandom in early 2014, before Dragon Age: Inquisition came out), I think Hawke/Anders was pretty much the biggest ship. (If it wasn’t, then it was definitely *one* of the biggest ships.) Nowadays hardly anyone writes for it. Perhaps, in time, new creators coming in all the time will ensure the Anders side of fandom grows again, and encourages new and more varied content. We’ll see! ❤️ 

I’m really sorry you got a trio of nasty anons threatening you, that’s really horrible ❤️ I don’t know what to advise as I’ve had anon asks turned off since 2016, but please don’t let them get to you. Arseholes exist everywhere, and it’s important not to let them win, and don’t let them demoralise you. Thanks for your kind words -- I don’t know that what I’m doing makes fandom a more transparent and healthier/safer space (I just lost my temper and got ranty LMAO), but if it DOES help people feel safer and better-armed with knowledge that might help them, I’m glad to have helped ❤️

Also, nothing wrong with shipping Fenris/Anders -- ship what makes you happy! I don’t ship it myself (it’s not a NOTP, just a “I don’t ship it”) but I WILL say that the Fenders side of fandom are one of the nicest, most supportive sides of DA2 fandom I’ve ever experienced. Many of my closest friends in this fandom are Fenders shippers. Despite how tough DA fandom can be, I promise you there ARE nice, decent, supportive people in this fandom, and I hope it doesn’t put you off writing and creating for your ship. ❤️

As for installing trackers and stuff, I’ll DM you when I have a spare moment! 

#5lazarus #replies

[fandomn00blr]

11. Who has a harder time getting the baby to eat their food?12. Who ends up having to hold whatever half-eaten snack the baby didn’t want anymore? 13. Who checks under the bed for monsters? for the parenting asks!

I’m going to answer these for my very wacky SerSolAdaar baby being raised by the entire Inquisition (it’s complicated, and I will never publish any of it to AO3 in any logical format, but you can read something I threw away on a Thursday once for this completely cracked out world state in which my Sera-mancing Adaar ends up accidentally conceiving a baby in the Fade with Solas). This scenario was actually my first foray into writing fan fiction (or at least knowingly doing so), which was always meant to just be a thing I did by myself and never told anyone about, but like, then stuff happened and now I actually share my writing with people...weird.

11. Who has a harder time getting the baby to eat their food?

Solas is the worst at it. He doesn’t understand why the baby won’t just eat. He wonders if maybe the child has lost their will to live, being born separate from the Fade where it was conceived. And he worries it might be his fault, but he would never say so. Sera mostly just gives it cookies, so of course the baby noms those down. And Adaar has no problem giving the boob whenever her baby is hungry. During War Table meetings, while addressing the troops, during diplomatic visits...Josephine, Cullen, and Leliana all dare anyone to raise an eyebrow or say anything about it.

12. Who ends up having to hold whatever half-eaten snack the baby didn’t want anymore?

Dorian. If he’s around. He falls for it every time. Baby hands him something, and he just takes it. “Ew! What even is this?! And why is it so sticky?!” Cole will sometimes nibble a little bite off and tell him.

13. Who checks under the bed for monsters?

The Iron Bull and Blackwall fight over who gets to do this one on a nightly basis. Sometimes, they accuse each other of being the monsters under the bed, which baby thinks is HILARIOUS. Squealing baby laughter and hand-clapping hilarious.

#parenting asks #dragon age #sersoladaar #we just call this baby Baby #it's better that way #5lazarus

[luzial]

9 & 10 for the writers' asks!

Thanks for the ask!  ❤

the “you got kudos“ e-mail is usually much appreciated, but is there a fic you wish you didn’t get these e-mails for? if so, which one and why?

There’s one really old fic I have on AO3. It was one of the first things I ever wrote and I didn’t actually post it until I started putting up some of my later work. I cleaned it up a bunch but, even so, it still doesn’t feel quite up to my standards now. Like, I read it and almost can’t recognize my own voice in it - maybe because I hadn’t quite found my voice yet? I wouldn’t go so far as to say I don’t want the kudos emails for it - I do. It just feels so strange to think of it in comparison to everything else I’ve written since.

what word do you keep using like it’s going out of style?

In addition to my previous answer, “eyes.” I feel like I obsess over the exact position of every character’s gaze (also, “gaze”) in any given scene.

(For fanfic writer asks)

#asks #about writing #5lazarus

[blarrghe]

for the prompts-46.“Let’s pretend you didn’t cheat on me with my sister and be good people for a few minutes.”

Angst said the prompt list, but this prompt. This prompt. Sorry but I think I’ve taken this in the least angsty direction possible, enjoy! -- Carver stands all in black, staring down the closed coffin in front of him. There’s a fierce look in his eye, more anger than sadness, and the crowd of mourners is leaving him a wide berth. His fist clenches at his side, and he closes his eyes, slowly, lost in some painful thought. He opens his eyes to the clicking of heels beside him. “Sorry for your loss.” Says a sultry voice. A woman with long legs and a soft cascade of curls overflowing from under a dark veil stands beside him. She is wearing a lacy black dress that is too tight and too short for this grim an affair. “I need to talk to you. Alone.” She whispers, and he scowls. “Let’s pretend you didn’t cheat on me with my sister and just be good people for a few minutes.” He replies, voice low and threatening. The woman next to him doesn’t flinch, just glances sidelong at him from under her veil, the shadow of her lips titling into a perfect smirk. “That isn’t what I want to talk about.” She says, “you’re going to want to see this.” She walks away from him, heels clicking sharply against the cold tile of the funeral home. He remains a moment, scowling still at the coffin before him, then turns and follows. “Isabella, we have nothing left to say to each --” His speech is cut off as his eyes land on a second woman, this one standing with crossed arms and a scowl that matches his own. In fact, everything about her, from her dark hair to the slight cleft in her chin, matches him. “Bethy...” He breathes, an audible gasp leaving his lips as he clutches a hand to his chest in shock. “I thought you were dead!” “Not Bethy.” Snarls this woman who looks just like his twin sister, “she is dead.” “Someone in the family has been keeping secrets.” Purrs Isabella. “What about her daughter?!” Carver shouts, “is she alive?” “The child’s alive,” another voice speaks, snarling out of the shadows, and all faces in the room turn to look up in shock. “For now.” Out strides a blond man in a cheap suit. He looks wild, crazed. His hair falls from the tie on his head in haphazard strands, glossy with too much product. His eyes flash blue, and his teeth glint in a sinister smile. “Alright, cut!” Carver lets out the laugh he’s been holding in, and bends himself over with hands on his knees, shaking his head. Isabella and Anders walk over to one another and high five, then together with Bethany they jump into a happy little banter, trading notes. Varric strides over to Carver, grinning. “You did great, kid.” He pats him on the back warmly. “You really think she’ll like it?” He asks, still shaking his head. “Trust me kid, she watches every episode of every one of these serials.” Varric replies, chuckling. “Alright everybody, last scene. Places!” Varric returns to his place behind the camera, and Carver takes a deep breath before fitting the scowl back on his face. “Not so fast, Anders!” Hawke’s first line is delivered with gusto, maybe too much gusto, though Varric would probably say that in this business, there’s no such thing. As she leaps out from her hidden place to finish the scene, the grin on her face is entirely real. “Hawke?!” Anders spins, and the rest of them gasp, on cue. “That’s right! You thought you killed me, but I survived!” Hawke laughs dramatically, and it takes everything Carver has not to roll his eyes. “AND!” Hawke continues, “I’m having your baby!” Varric yells for cut again, and quickly they all reposition, in front of the camera to record their final message. Varric steps in front of the camera. “This week on Swords and Sorrows, a friend of mine requested that we do something a little special, for one of our most dedicated viewers.” He says, “so from all of us here at the studio, and from all of your friends -- ” “Happy birthday, Merrill!” Everyone on set joins in the unified shout, and Carver’s voice is the loudest.

#my fic #my writing #writing prompts #not angst lol #da2 #merrill #carver #the da2 crew #merrill x carver #kinda #this was so stupid and fun #why doesnt tumblr let you tag ask answers anymore #5lazarus #da2 fanfic

[s1ithers]

I saw your gorgeous drawing of Anders laughing while having an absolutely horrible day, went through your art tag, and it really cheered me up. love your art, love that portrait, I felt like I could hear him laughing and the whole tragedy and unfairness of his story. anyway, just dropping in to say--thank you, and thanks for sharing your art :)

also your Hawke is the most interesting Hawke I've seen in fandom. I really, really like the story you've shown in your art, and I'm gonna keep that in the back of my mind when I do my next DA2 playthrough. Really cool way of grounding a character in the lore and history that the franchise has set up. anyway, thanks for making my day! your art is really cool.

man i haven’t been on tumblr in a minute but this was so so nice to log in and see! thank you ♥

#5lazarus #legit ur tags abt them as tired old anarchists running the community garden are reminding me why i loved this character too #like... that's it #that's them #Falling in Love With Justice that's the ship

[5lazarus]

Labyrinth

"Anders made no attempt at escape during the years they were together." This story is meant to explore everything absolutely horrible about that statement. If the core part of Anders' identity is his refusal to submit to imprisonment, then perhaps listening to Karl was a violation of his sense of self. Things get better, and then things get worse. Read on Archive Of Our Own here. Read Ch. 2/3 here. Chapter 1/3: The Circle

Love does not make the Circle more bearable. It does not banish Kinloch Hold’s ghosts. Anders brushes by Karl while stacking books under Uldred’s watching eye; Karl taps his shoulder but keeps moving, and they both smile. Let them think they are only good friends. The threat of separation hangs heavy over them both. Everyone remembers what happened to Lorcan and Bartie. Anders does not want to see that happen to them. They get excused from the First Enchanter’s lecture of Fade mutability to pray in the Chantry. Everyone knows Anders is devout, as fervently as a libertari must be; everyone knows Karl is, too, though perhaps less fervent. They fuck quickly and quietly behind a statue, Anders gripping him hard, and when they finish, Anders says, “I kind-of get off on it. Fucking under Andraste’s eye.”

Karl sighs, adjusting his robes. He murmurs into his neck, “I’d rather a bed. One day, my leg will cramp, or you’ll get overeager with that lightning, and--” “And you’ll drop me or I’ll electrocute you, yes.” Anders kisses his forehead, holding him close. If a templar ambles by, Karl will pretend to cry over his dead mother. Every mage has a dead mother, it’s an easy way to get the templars off your back. He giggles. “Imagine getting to surrender .” Karl says, “I can.” The robes are handy for a quick fuck, but Anders wants more than that. He wonders if the Knight-Commander has tacitly set aside the chapel for fucking, because a tower of mages keyed up on sexual aggression is worse than a tower of mages seeking quick and fast release. It’s such a waste of Karl’s body, which deserves to be teased and tasted and explored. Back in the library, interminably shelving books, Anders says aloud, “Imagine getting to see your lover naked.” Leorah says, “There are always the storerooms. If you don’t mind the spiders.” “Ugh,” Anders says. “I don’t even like being watched.” And that is another invitation for a quick exploration. Fucking is an act of rebellion. Love is something worse. These quick fucks in the Chantry, fingering and fellating in the library--it gets tiring, after awhile. They all deserve more. One midday break in the storeroom, finally nude, Karl says, “Don’t you dare leave me. Don’t you dare leave me here.” “You can leave with me.” Anders is still straddling him. The stone walls are chilly, and he’s beginning to get cold. Uncomfortable, he shifts, and starts reaching for his clothes. Karl leans his head back and sighs. “Where would you even go?” Anders laughs, slipping back into his robes. “Does that matter? Away from here. Anywhere. Maybe even Tevinter. Everyone likes a healer.” Aghast, Karl says, “By Andraste, Tevinter? Don’t even say it. Don’t even think it. They won’t even take you to Aeonar, they’ll just kill you. Or make you Tranquil.” “Probably make me Tranquil,” Anders jokes. It’s a little silly to be scolded by a naked man, prostate on a cold cobble floor, with his cock shrinking. “I’m cute, they’ll still make use of me.” “Don’t joke about that!” Karl snaps, and the torches about them flare in his anger. Quickly he pulls on his robes, refusing to look at him. “I don’t want to talk about this. Don’t even think it in my direction. You know what they did to Bartie. I can’t bear for that to happen to you.” Anders sours, mouth twisting. “If you loved me, you wouldn’t be able to bear what staying here--being locked up here --does. Don’t you remember being outside? I know you weren’t born in the Circle.” “That was a long time ago,” Karl says. “And the Anderfels were no kinder to me than they were to you.” “The steppes,” Anders pushes. “The stars on a clear night, shining on the gray earth. Tilling the soil back to get at the red clay. The clatter of a wooden shuttle.” Karl says, “Your father screaming when you set the thatch roof on fire. Your mother sobbing in relief when the templars took you away. And the first time you could sit at a table and gorge yourself. Eating until you were full, and then a plate of strawberries and cream after that.” Anders says, “The templars locked me in a closet for biting. I never got that meal.” He walked out of the storeroom, leaving Karl behind. In the dormitory that night Anders quietly masturbates, thinking about fucking outside, the rough feel of grass under his skin, digging his nails into the dirt, crickets chirping and only the stars there to witness them. In the bed opposite over Karl rolls over on his side, back to him, and Anders exhales, suddenly unwilling to continue. He wants to call him over, he wants to slip next to him and press against him, tease a hot breath against his neck, kiss the tenseness away. But he cannot. A templar pauses in the doorway, and Anders takes his hands out from under the covers and raises them pointedly. The templar rolls their eyes and continues on. Karl whispers, “Must you provoke them?” Ander says, “Wouldn’t you

like to spend a whole night with me? Wouldn’t that be nice?” The templar backs up into the doorway and crosses their arms. Anders amends his statement: “Platonically, of course. I’m very warm. Wonderful to cuddle with.” The templar says, “Is he bothering you, Thekla?” Karl quickly says, “No, not at all. Ser.” Uldred tells him the next day that the First Enchanter has decided to crack down on the libertari faction in Kinloch Hold. He has a gleam in his eye as he talks about Irving’s plans for yet another witch hunt for blood mages, and Anders is irritated as Uldred yet again tries to talk him into using blood magic to get the templars to look away. He figures he has a few choices. He can volunteer for the war effort and join the King as a healer, and eventually get his pick of Circles to return to. He can talk loudly in the mess hall about the necessity of doing one’s best to serve the Maker, because magic was made to serve man, not to rule over him, and keep his head down for a couple years before developing a personality again. Or he can accept that they are transferring him to a harsher Circle. They have all heard stories about Kirkwall, and how the White Spire farms mages out to the petty nobility. Anders chooses none of them. He follows the mages to King Cailan’s camp and slips away. In the chaos of the Blight, he manages to disappear. Karl does not come with him. He does not even bother to ask.

#karl thekla/anders #kanders #anders #karl thekla #mildly smutty I guess #da2 #dragon age fanfiction #dragon age fanfic #dao #awakening #labyrinth #fanfic #5lazarus #hes5thlazarus

[theharellan]

yo I hope you don't mind--I always feel like I'm being a bit weird when I'm interacting with your stuff, I'm sorry--but just wanting to say I really enjoy how you engage with the character of Solas. thoroughly enjoy your meta! especially in how you talk about the revolutionary aspect of his character--that's also what drew me to him. sorry if this is weird, I just always get excited when I see one of your solas meta posts cross my dash

omg you’re all good! interacting anything besides rp threads/promos is fair game in my book (and even then it’s more for my rp partners’ sake). so you don’t have to hesitate or feel weird! i always love seeing your url in my notes (or when i see you in the notes of the like two non-rp blogs i follow from this account). i’m really glad you enjoy my meta!!

#( ooc ) #5lazarus #( asks )

[musetta3]

was there a specific piece of music that made you realize you were going to become a professional opera singer? a specific moment?

Hi @5lazarus! Thank you for the ask, my friend. :)

Acutally, yes. When I was 10 years old, My mom showed me Franco Zeffirelli’s production of La Traviata, with Teresa Stratas and Placido Domingo. I heard the music, and it moved me to tears with its beauty. I couldn’t believe that humans could make such beautiful sounds, that such music even existed. It was what heaven sounded like, to me, and that’s when I knew I wanted to sing like Violetta, the main character. Problem being that I was waay too young to start studying at 10. 

So I got around it by learning the music: I’d sit in front of the CD player and play the same opera over and over again with the little libretti/lyric book that came with the CDs. When it was obvious that this wasn’t just a childish fancy/a phase, my parents got me opera scores for Christmas, every year for over a decade. I have soooo many scores now, and still use and cherish them.

Violetta and Traviata will always be my favorites and hold a special place in my heart <3

#musical inspiration #opera #opera singer #la traviata #5lazarus #about musetta #musetta answers

[kunstpause-archive]

from the storyteller weekend prompt! what makes you write fanfic?

(For the fanfic writer weekend)

Oh, good one!

I write exclusively for video game fandoms, so I think the most driving force behind it is, that I am given this sorta blank slate as the player character and I need more than the very basic game interactions to flesh the character out.

Or there are non-romanceable NPCs and I need to tell that particular story. Or the romance in-game is lacking what I feel it needs.

Those have been the most obvious driving forces. And then there is the whole thing that it is sometimes simply easier to write a story about a certain character (or a certain situation) if the world already exists and you don’t have to come up with the entire setting and establish that one first.

#Kunstpause answers stuff #fanfic writer weekend #thank you! #5lazarus

[andhers]

My Creative Type (Quiz)

Tagged: @5lazarus ✪ (Thank you~ 👋💙)

You are: THE VISIONARY - Imagining the Impossible

Creative Strengths: Full of big ideas, ability to see potential and possibility everywhere

Untapped Potential: Using your visions to fuel consistent daily action

Ideal Collaborator: The Thinker

You live in a world of infinite possibilities, preferring to see things not as they are but as they could be. You know that life is limited only by the boundaries of your own beliefs, and you’re driven to push the limits of, well, everything.

Emotional, passion-driven, and full of ideas, the VISIONARY combines a vivid imagination with a desire for practical solutions. Your introspective and intuitive nature is balanced by a keen interest in the world around you and a desire to contribute to society.

Charismatic and expressive, you love sharing your ideas and visions with others and creating community around shared values and ideals. Your greatest gift? The ability to see the spark of potential in everything and everyone, and to inspire others to see it, too. You’re able to guide people toward an invisible horizon with a rare generosity of spirit and strength of conviction.

Don’t get stuck in the dreaming stage, VISIONARY. Your greatest challenge—and true power—lies in learning to take consistent daily action to create the future you envision.

Seek out the “voice of reason” of the THINKER type to help you take a grounded, rational approach to your creative work. The THINKER’s deep perception and probing intellect lend a powerful clarity that can bring your visions into sharper focus.

Tagging: @silent-plains-rose @hawkeish @inquisitor-anora @strongsong117 @maleficarum-regrets (But only if you’d like~ 👩‍🎨✨) and all other interested parties. @ me in your posts if you try it out!

QUIZ LINK HERE

#well would you look at that #according to adobe we're two of a kind #on that note though #if you ever get the whole daily consistency thing worked out... tell me about it lmao #anyway the part about seeing things 'not as they are but as they could be' #puts me in mind of a piece of advice my memaw (a retired carpenter) still gives me once in awhile when we're out shopping secondhand #she says to always evaluate a piece you're considering in terms of what you could make of it #NOT what it is now #guess that's where i get it 🤗 #5lazarus #tag game #abouthers

[luzial]

5 & 7, to cover all the writing asks!

Thank you! 💙💙

5. Which of your fics do you wish was more successful?

Definitely In and Out of Time Again, but it has so much working against it, lol. It’s an unusual concept for an AU. It includes first-person letters, which not every reader likes. It’s firmly within the DA setting but sometimes you need to look closely to understand how.

It’s something I wish I had written at the height of DA:I fandom - so 4 or 5 years ago. But I couldn’t have written it then because the book that inspired it (This is How You Lose the Time War) hadn’t been published it yet. I also doubt I had the skill level to have done it “right” at that point.

I mentioned this in my answer to question 1, but IAOOTA is the thing I’ve written that feels most like it is only for me. That’s a wonderful thing, but it also means that I can’t be terribly surprised when it doesn’t get the kind of engagement some of my other stuff does.

7. What’s your favourite piece of description or narration?

This was a tough one! I had snippets in mind from a variety of pieces, but in the end, I love this whole Solas POV for a chapter of Ruins. In particular:

He remembered far too late that Orlesians enjoyed bringing out their most potent stores for events like this, all the better to ensure conversation flowed as freely as possible. The last time he made this mistake he’d spent half a night leaning lazily against a marble statue that seemed more and more risqué each time he glanced up at it. Well, that and saying every foolish thing that entered his mind the moment she spoke to him.

The heady blend of power, danger, and sex, he thought, wincing even as the words returned to him. Why, of everything that happened on that eventful evening, did that particularly embarrassing turn of phrase remain solidly in his memory? And the look on her face when he’d said it - a horrifying mixture of disbelief, amusement, and - worst of all - curiosity.

For End of Year Fic-Writer asks

#asks #in and out of time again #end of year #5lazarus #ruins by luzial #about writing