#(yes. i am deliberately writing some names wrong to avoid this post showing up on main tags pages) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

spectralscathath · 3 years

Note

do robyn :3c:

Send me a RWBY character and I’ll tell you:

Robyn Hill

My top three ships for the character

Clover/Robyn (Lucky Shot is my OTP), Qrow/Robyn (Jailbyrds is a spite ship and I’ll admit it), Roman/Robyn (Rob the Rich, if only for the name)

My three least favorite ships for the character

Robyn/any of the other Happy Huntresses, Robyn/Winter (I remember that fucking ‘snowbyrd’ discourse you bastards), Robyn/Qrow (when I remove the spite goggles I don’t like this at all.)

My biggest criticism for the character

you got 10 minutes? 20? Maybe 30? Buckle up fuckos. I got some points to make and you’re gonna listen.

1. Robyn Hill is wasted potential

Robyn’s first appearance was one of my favourite scenes of Vol7. No joke! She was witty, interesting, had an excellent banter with Clover, deliberately stood down from a fight she couldn’t win, though she seemed eager for a challenge, showed some cunning, and looked like she was having fun.

And then pretty much all of that got ignored. Robyn was set up as a good, smart leader with a cocky swagger, history with Clover, a deceptively cunning streak, and a calm, level-headed attitude. What Robyn was from then on was Angry Shouty Hothead Picks Fights She Can’t Win. She turned into someone impulsive, short-sighted, bullheaded, and focused only on fighting. 70% of Robyn’s lines are about violence and how she likes violence and how she wants to fight with VIOLENCE. The other 30% are, incidentally, ‘i’m so smart and understanding and kind, I’m gonna force people to undergo a lie detector test via peer pressure and ultimatums but it’s actually tragic that no one wants to be my friend because of my semblance. Poor me.

And that was not what I was expecting. That is not what was foreshadowed. And compared to what the potential could have been, a good allusion rich with depth, a setting that could ahve been interesting if it wasn’t so rushed, how she could have been a player on the board, filled so many possible roles, and instead she was a walking ‘Ironwood bad’ mouthpiece that didn’t actually do anything (and has never done well in a fight, which is RWBY’s staple). What a waste.

2. Robyn Hill actively makes things worse and gets no comeuppance

Robyn Hill makes situations worse. First of all, she steals supplies from Ironwood (and then doesn’t use them???? what the fuck????), which puts Ironwood under stress, which then leads to Ruby being Miss Unhelpful (but that’s a rant for another day). Robyn then gets classified info from Blake and Yang who, may I remind you, never met her. She could have been a spy! But no, Blake just has a gut feeling (because the script said so).

Robyn then calls James out on this, which later leads to ‘how did Robyn know about the global communications tower’, which means the fighting happens in the office, everyone stresses, Salem provides one of the few redeeming scenes in the show post-Ironwatts fight (it all went downhill from there, even more then it already was). Robyn didn’t explicitly cause this but she sure as fuck had a hand in it.

Then you have fucking. Clover’s death. Yes, Robyn, agreeing with the serial killer who just tried to murder you and starting a fight in an enclosed space when you’re a ranged fighter vs your melee combatant ex-boyfriend is absolutely the smart thing to do. And then, for a moment, Qrow and Clover nearly sort things out, and fucking Robyn jumps in again. And then, what did she do? She got knocked out immediately. Yikes. Ladies and gentlemen, our ‘Resident Strong Female Character’. But because she did all this, she pretty much guaranteed first: Tyrian escaped. Secondly: Clover died.

And yeah, Robyn. Just because Qrow didn’t personally shove that blade through Clover’s chest, he still worked with The Serial Killer Who Kills People to help. So yeah, Robyn, that does count as some sort of murder. Or at least, accomplice to murder. You’re also vaguely adjacent to it, so don’t get all ‘but Qrow’s innocent’.

It’s the same problem with team RWBY. They do terrible things, they whine about how hard it is, and all is forgiven cause they’re cute sad girls. There’s no comeuppance. There’s no growth. It’s just the script going ‘this character is right because we said so, so now we’re gonna do our best approximation of if a pretzal and a contortionist had an unholy boneless lovechild and bend the plot so the characters win anyway.’

3. Robyn Hill is a static character

This is gonna sound weird with this lil header but Robyn actually had an arc in vol7! She had an arc that was fairly basic, she went from ‘I don’t trust Ironwood and want to know what’s going on’ to ‘I am actively ruining Ironwood’s goals’ and finally settled on ‘I know what’s going on, Ironwood is worth supporting, and I do trust him.’ It was a simple arc, but it didn’t need to be anything more then that.

Then in the span of about 1 minute all her actual development was reversed and she ran backwards to her original stance of ‘Ironwood bad’. We literally saw her devleopment walk backwards, and there it stayed. She spent all of vol8 as an empty voicebox that occasionally pipped out ‘Qrow’s my friend’ and was devoid of any personality. She didn’t have much beforehand that wasn’t fairly generic, so it’s almost impressive.

The problem is that static characters take a lot of work to avoid being boring characters. A lot of rwby just has these problems in general, character development is either ignored, skipped over, or given to the wrong characters, but in Robyn’s case it’s actively annoying because she had some development, and then she ignored all of that to go back to being ‘ironwood bad’ with a side of ‘Qrow good’ because we needed to be reminded of that after he got an innocent man killed.

4. Robyn Hill is an unnecessary character

Why are you here. What do you do. Robyn was stated to be a character meant to act in opposition to Ironwood, to put him under stress like every other fucking character in this series. This was ‘confirmed’ by Eddy Rivas, which means zero because at some point the mentally deranged Weazel Ball that masquerades as the crwby writing team’s collective braincell will rapidly and suddenly change direction, causing massive retcons and plotholes in their moth-eaten threadbare dishtowel they dare to call ‘lore’, and we will have a different excuse for this waste of a good VA.

Here’s the thing tho: Robyn as ‘opposition for Ironwood’ isn’t fucking special. The fucking air in the Atlas Academy lobby opposes Ironwood. Robyn seems to be there... because Mantle needed a voice? Okay, well, why the fuck did Mantle need to exist? Because... the election plotline needed to exist so Jacque could do something mean? God, everything about Mantle and Robyn and the election plotline is just annoying. It drags and it adds nothing to the plotline and it all should have been culled so instead we could focus on things that are actually important (like maybe: the myth arc? character development? the fucking Schnees in Atlas???) rather then rwby’s fuckboi incel attempt at ‘classism = bad?’. If I, as a professional paid editor who works with actual manuscripts, was given the scripts for rwby vol7, I would have gotten the big red highlighter and done a shitload of crossing out. Then I would have told the writing team “come back with your second draft”, but alas, we got the Atlas Arc.

My favorite thing about the character

I love her design aside from that ugly-ass scarf. Also, her VA, Cristina Vee, is the only redeeming quality of this tire-fire of a character. Godbless and praise.

A headcanon I have about them

She deals with chronic ‘ponytail keeps falling out’ syndrome, just constantly. So many hairbands get used up when she does anything.

What I would change about them if I was making a re-write

Everything. Every fucking thing. Especially that stupid fucking lie-detecting semblance.

What I I think of their character allusion and what (if anything) I would change about it

It’s incredibly underutilised. It’s Robin Hood in-name-only. It’s like, the most basic ‘oh the name is Robin and they steal’ and there’s not even any of the most obvious tells. Where’s the bright green? Where’s the hood? Where’s the fucking longbow? Where’s the ‘giving to the poor’ that comes after ‘stealing the rich’? She didn’t actually use any of those things she stole to fix Mantle, she just stole it.

Literally, all the classic elements of Robin Hood are missing, all that’s there is a name and... that’s it. The allusion isn’t there, and even if it was, it’s done in a boring fashion.

Personally, I would add more Robin Hood elements, and I would change one key thing. I would change her allegiance. Instead of ‘Robin Hood on the side of good’, I would take the team WTCH approach, a ‘good allusion turned evil’, and I’d have Robyn working with Salem, or, at least, as an antagonist. Because that could be actually interesting then the boring and unnecessary storyline we had.

#rwby #robyn hill #asks #if you get mad at this just remember Galatians 4:16

9 notes · View notes

ewankoseyo · 5 years

Text

magnetic || jinyoung pt. 5 (final)

A/N: Wow she finally writes !!! Once again, apologies for the long delay, but after getting through a lot of work and life things, I’ve finally finished magnetic. Thank you to everyone who’s been reading all my stories, it warms my heart. I have a bit more time nowadays so I’ll be posting more frequently. I’ve got two requests sitting in my inbox right now, so be on the lookout for those stories. In the meantime, please send me your requests!

Hope you enjoy the finale of magnetic!

To say that Jaebum was overprotective of you was an understatement.

Yes, he knew you could take care yourself, and yes, he had been the one to reassure your parents that you would be okay in America by yourself, but when it came to dating, it was as if you’d gained a third parent. Which really meant that when it came to dating...actually, that was about it. It never came to dating. Because you dating was never going to happen, at least not on Jaebum’s watch.

So when you were 17 and the annual school dance rolled around, it was no surprise that you would be going to be dateless once again.

“But O-ppa! It’s my last school dance!”

“And...?” Jaebum rebuffed, not paying any mind to your annoyed expression as he tightened up his shoe laces. He had let you tag along to an open dance session he and the other members decided to hold by themselves one Saturday since they felt they needed more practice for the upcoming debut. When Jaebum called for a five-minute water break, you took it upon yourself to resume your complaining from before practice started.

“It’s the last school dance and so the boys are going to be even wilder and that’s why you’re not allowed to have a date,” Jaebum reasoned simply without batting an eyelash.

“But all my friends got asked out and are bringing dates. I’ll be the only one going stag!” You groaned, uncharacteristically stomping your foot for emphasis. You were rarely ever bratty, but Jaebum was being completely unreasonable! You deserved to have fun the way you wanted to, especially because it was your last go. Unfortunately, your parents listened to everything Jaebum said, so if he said you shouldn’t be dating, even if it’s just going to the school dance with some friend who happened to be a guy, it was basically law.

Jaebum finished tying the other shoelace before looking at you quizzically. “So if your friends all jumped off a bridge, would you jump too?” You let out an annoyed screech, earning an amused smirk from your brother.

“Jackson! Don’t you think Oppa is being dumb right now?”

Jackson took a swig from his water bottle before joining you two in the middle of the dance floor. “I think she’s right. It is just one dance, and it’s not like she’s going off and eloping with the first guy that will ask her...” He was about to continue the thought when he noticed Jaebum glaring daggers at him, silently challenging him to choose his next words wisely. “But, then again! High school boys, you know, they’re still so immature and they only want one thing! Plus there’s nothing wrong with going to a dance alone. It means you won’t be tied down to your date and you can hang out with whoever you want. Isn’t that right, JB?” Jackson gave a nervous laugh, slowly backing away from the conversation to avoid any impending confrontation with the leader.

You sighed, looking around the room for another (more assertive) opinion. “Mark?”

“Uh...” The older boy looked up from his phone. He had heard bits and pieces of your conversation and was really hoping he wouldn’t get roped into it. With the way Jaebum was now looking at him menacingly, Mark decided it was best not to answer at all. “What? Oh, I think I’m getting a call, I need to take this. Hello?” Before you could protest, he had walked out of the studio to answer the imaginary phone call.

“O-ppaaa...” You whined. “Are you really going to do this to me? You’re going to let me go to my last school dance EVER dateless? Everyone’s going to laugh at me and I’ll be graduating from high school known as the girl who could never get a date. Is that what you want? You want your sister to live as an embarrassment for the rest of high school? How am I supposed to live like that?” You knew you were being annoyingly overdramatic, but you were desperate.

“I’ll tell you what,” Jaebum began after taking a moment to ponder on your argument. “You can take a date, but it has to be one of us.”

You grimaced. “Eww Oppa! Going with you to the dance is even worse than going alone.”

“Then have one of the other members take you.”

Jaebum’s words had caught the attention of three boys who surrounded you in a matter of seconds.

“Noona, take me!” Bambam slung an arm around your shoulders and waggled his eyebrows at you. “I clean up really nice! Just imagine me in a suit. We’ll be the best looking couple at the dance, all of your classmates will be jealous!”

Yugyeom wrenched Bambam off of you before you could reply and quickly took over his spot. “No Noona, take me. It’s a dance, not a fashion show. Watch this!” He unlatched himself from you to show you a quick eight-count that he had been working on. Yugyeom finished with a pose, perching his chin on top his hand and giving you a smirk. “You’re a good dancer, I’m the best dancer out of the seven of us,” This earned a collective groan from everyone in the room. “Doesn’t it just make sense for us to go together? I can show you a great time!”

“Why would she want to take children to her last school dance?” Youngjae scoffed next to you. “She would obviously rather go with someone who could be her classmate.” He turned to face you, taking one of your hands in his and placing his other gently on your waist. You couldn’t help but giggle as he led you in a mini-waltz. “Just imagine us dancing like this, all eyes on us as I sing along to the song playing in your ear...it’ll be a night you won’t forget!” Youngjae mused as he twirled you around, earning more laughter from you.

“So what do you say Noona, who are you going with?”

“Uh...”

Jaebum sighed at the younger members’ antics, getting up from his seated position and putting his hands on his hips to reassume authority in the conversation. The three boys cowered away from you, anticipating their leader’s reprimand.

“On second thought, if you really want to go with a date, I’d rather you go with...” Jaebum’s eyes traveled around the room before landing on a certain boy who had been playing on his phone and keeping to himself throughout the whole conversation. “Jinyoung, come here.”

Jinyoung tensed up when he heard his name. He thought that if he was quiet enough, everyone would forget he was in the room and he wouldn’t be prompted to join the stupid conversation. He slowly got up from the bench in the corner of the room and made his way to where everyone had gathered.

“...What’s up?” He asked with a sigh, already knowing what was coming.

“Oppa, why...” You blinked a few times at the boy now standing across from you. Had you been that obvious? You always tried to make it seem like you were more than happy to get Jaebum from practice or tag along with him just to be nice, but had he actually picked up on your ulterior motives? And if he did, why wasn’t he freaking out about you crushing over his best friend? Or was this just his sick and twisted way of setting you two up together? You cleared your throat in an attempt at nonchalance. “W-why Jinyoung? And not the others?”

Jinyoung raised his eyebrows, gazing at Jaebum unamused. “You want me to take her to her dance?”

“Mark’s too awkward, Jackson would enjoy himself too much, and these three goofs over here would make fools of themselves and ruin our reputation before we even debut,” Jaebum explained without skipping a beat. He ignored the offended chorus of “hey!”s from the younger boys as he continued. “Jinyoung’s a polite gentleman, who I believe many girls consider very handsome, and you know he’s good at dancing. I also trust that he wouldn’t pull anything stupid at the dance. Is he not the perfect date?”

“Oppa...”

“I’m not going with her to that dance,” Jinyoung stated flatly. “You can’t force me to do that.” You resisted the urge to complain in response even though you also agreed you shouldn’t take Jinyoung. He was acting like you were the plague. You knew you were behaving like a little punk at that moment, but spending an evening with you wouldn’t kill the guy.

“Ah, may I remind you that you still owe me for covering for your ass when you were running late to vocals last week?” Jaebum scratched his head in mock contemplation. “Should I really tell the vocal coach that you were late because you were coming back from your little date?”

“Date?” You repeated, hoping no one picked up on the slight twitch in your voice.

Jinyoung rolled his eyes. “I already told you it wasn’t a date. I was hanging out with an old friend who just happened to be a girl that I realized had a thing for me halfway through hanging out, and I was only running late because she kept trying to get me to hang out with her even longer and she was being really persistent.”

"I don’t know,” Jaebum deliberated in a sing-song voice. “It may have been a one-sided date, but it was still a date, and I don’t think the managers would be happy to hear you were out on one.”

“Are you seriously blackmailing me right now?”

“I’ll throw in 500 won from the early birthday present I got from my parents.”

“Wait hold on,” you interjected. “If the managers would get mad about any of you going out on a date, wouldn’t they get mad if Jinyoung went with me to the dance?”

Jaebum shook his head incredulously. “Of course not! You’re family. And Jinyoung’s basically part of our family with all the time he spends over at our house!”

“Family. Right...” Jinyoung deadpanned. “So, you said 500 won?”

——

It had been a few days since the late night incident in the kitchen and you still hadn’t spoken to Jinyoung.

Scratch that—you two did talk, but only during the challenges.

You would join the group in the morning with only seconds to spare before you all had to prepare for filming. Before Jinyoung could even try to say hi to you, you were already engaging yourself in conversation with one of the other boys, the silent treatment you were giving Jinyoung going unnoticed to them. When it was time for you to all get into your pairs, you immediately got friendlier with Jinyoung as the cameras focused on you. You two participated cooperatively on whatever challenge was happening, but as soon as filming was over, you were gone from his side once again.

If Jinyoung had any qualms on whether you were still upset with him with the way you were being nonchalant during the challenges, that quickly answered his question.

It was now the night of the last concert of the tour. The challenges had ended the day before and because there was now a close tie between three top teams (Bambam and Youngjae were sorely convinced that you had it out for them ever since they sabotaged you in the maze game,) it was up to the fans to vote online who they thought should win. With the winners being announced the next day, all that was left was filming for the actual concert.

An hour before the concert and everyone was in the dressing rooms getting ready. Bambam and Mark were getting their make up done. Youngjae was pulled aside to another room for an interview. You were sitting around with Jaebum and Yugyeom since they were both the first ones ready. Jinyoung and Jackson were picking out their outfits and changing behind a nearby clothing rack.

“You know if you keep staring like that, you’ll eventually burn a hole into her head,” Jackson joked, nudging Jinyoung to bring the boy out of his one-sided staring contest with you.

“I’m not staring, I’m just...” Jinyoung randomly grabbed two hangers from the rack. “...trying to decide which one of these I should wear. This one or this one?”

Jackson smirked but decided to play along. “That one,” he suggested, pointing to an all-black ensemble.

“Cool, thanks,” Jinyoung nodded, putting the other outfit back on the rack. But Jackson wasn’t done with him just yet.

“So are you going to tell me why things are even weirder between you two?”

“Me and who?”

Jackson rolled his eyes and nudged his head in your direction. You were laughing at something Yugyeom said, Jaebum looking between the both of you with an unamused expression. “She might think she’s being sly but I can tell she’s giving you the silent treatment.”

“You talk to her more than I do,” Jinyoung deadpanned. “so why ask a question you already know the answer to?”

“Because I want to hear you say it out loud,” Jackson teased, remembering the identical conversation he had with you earlier that week. “You know, you two are a lot more similar than you think.”

Jinyoung stared back at him stoically. “Good to know.”

Jackson chuckled before switching to a serious expression. “C’mon dude, what’s really going on with you? I hate seeing friends fight. You can tell me what’s up. Wang Gae Park Gae remember?”

Jinyoung raised his eyebrows in disbelief. “I thought you said that was over when I beat you in the maze game.”

“But that was then and this is now!”

Jinyoung sighed as Jackson beamed back at him expectantly. Though he knew Jackson could be loud and, well, Jackson, Jinyoung knew it was better to open up to him. Jackson could be annoyingly persistent but it always came from a good place. Plus maybe Jackson would tell him what you’ve been telling him and he’d be able to go about this whole situation with you?

“Fine.” Jinyoung squatted, tugging Jackson down to his level so that they were completely hidden behind the clothing rack. “But keep it down. I don’t want the others, especially Jaebum, hearing and turning it into a whole thing.”

Jackson smiled playfully, pretending to zip his lips to let the younger boy know he was all ears.

You glanced over to where Jinyoung and Jackson were picking out their outfits as Jaebum lectured Yugyeom about his provocative dancing next to you. You felt your heartbeat quicken as you noticed the two of them speaking closely, as if they were afraid of anyone hearing them, then ducking down behind the clothing rack. They had to be talking about you. You tried to focus on the two boys bickering next to you, but in the back of your head, you were freaking out. Was Jackson going to spill everything you ranted about Jinyoung to Jinyoung? He never told anyone the secrets you trusted him with. Or if he did, everyone else was really good at pretending that they didn’t know anything.

You were already very embarrassed by your outburst with Jinyoung. You only wanted to understand why his actions contradicted his words and hopefully come to some mature truce that would develop into a real friendship. You didn’t mean to completely lash out and burst into tears right in front of him. You were already wary of how to act around Jinyoung before, now you were just absolutely clueless. Which is why you were only talking to him when you had to and pretending like everything was fine when you did. You could not bring yourself to have another confrontation with Jinyoung so it was best to avoid him at all costs.

Was this how he usually was with you?

“Noona, what do you think?”

“Huh?” Yugyeom was waving his hand in front of your face to catch your attention. You hadn’t noticed they stopped arguing. “Sorry, what were you saying?”

“Since it’s the last concert of the tour, we need to finish with something big,” Jaebum explained. “I say we end with ‘Before the Full Moon Rises.’”

“And I say that makes the end of the concert really sad, so our encore should be an energizer, like ‘Go Higher,’” Yugyeom reasoned. “You’re the unbiased opinion here Noona, so you should decide.”

“It’s totally up to you, but remember, Oppa is always right.”

You rolled your eyes at your brother. “You mean your last concert is in less than an hour and you don’t know what you’re doing for the encore yet?”

“We just want to have fun with it,” Jaebum stated. “Besides, if worse comes to worst, we’ll just rock-paper-scissors the encore onstage. The fans always love that.”

“Sure they do,” you quipped back sarcastically. “But I agree with Yugyeom, the encore should be an energizer.”

“Ha! Told you Hyung—”

“But not ‘Go Higher.’” You giggled as you watched Yugyeom’s metaphorical bubble burst.

“Then which song should we do?”

You batted your eyelashes knowingly at Jaebum. “You already know what my favorite song is.”

The two boys scoffed. “We haven’t done that song in so long,” Jaebum complained. “Yugyeom barely memorizes the lyrics to our current songs, how is he going to remember the words to that one?”

“Hey!”

You both ignored the maknae’s pouting. “But I really want to hear it again,” you said earnestly. “Just one last time, please!”

“That can be arranged.”

Jinyoung and Jackson appeared before you three, all dressed and ready to go. You couldn’t help but steal a glimpse at Jinyoung—as if he couldn’t get even more handsome, he seemed to prove you wrong—but you immediately averted your gaze when you noticed him looking back at you. Jaebum was about to question what Jinyoung meant when a staff member came into the room.

“Gather around everyone! Let’s do a quick huddle so we can make this last show the best one!”

——

The concert had gone off without a hitch. Their international concerts were a lot different than the ones you were used to back home. Bigger venue. Bigger stage. Bigger audience. More lights. More speeches in English. More translations of speeches that weren’t in English. More American pop culture references. A different kind of vibe from the audience. You’ve gone to their concerts before and loved each and every one of them, but this was like watching them for the first time all over again.

You enjoyed yourself, singing and dancing along to all the songs in the wings of the stage. Watching the boys perform never ceased to amaze you as you remembered their humble beginnings. They had come such a long way in chasing their dreams and truly deserved all the love they received from fans on tour.

“We unfortunately are nearing the end of our last show of this tour,” Jackson announced on stage, immediately met back with boos and groans to not leave from the audience. The other boys looked on at the fans with a mix of adoration and sympathy as Jackson continued. “We just want to thank you all so much for coming out here and seeing us tonight. You know, we wouldn’t have made it this far if it weren’t for you guys constantly supporting the music and I think I speak for all of the boys when I say we love you. Thank you all again so much!”

“Now we want to finish this concert on a happy note,” Mark added quickly to lighten up the mood. “So we have a special surprise for you all! Our next and final song is one we haven’t done in a while, so we’ve got a special guest here to help us remember the words...”

Before you could put two and two together, you felt a staff member give you a gentle nudge. They responded to your confused expression by whispering for you to go out on stage. As your legs mindlessly walked you out, you were met with deafening cheers and screams from the audience. A staff member ran onto the stage to place a stool in front of the boys.

“My little sister!” Jaebum exclaimed and pointed to you proudly. The fans reacted with a chorus of “aww”s and started chanting your name.

You were so caught in a daze with everything happening around you that you had no time to comprehend the meaning of Jinyoung smiling softly at you.

You had no time to protest Jinyoung lightly taking your hand and leading you like a gentleman to sit on the stool.

“Once again, thank you all so much for partying with us tonight. We’re GOT7, this is ‘Magnetic,’ goodnight!”

As Jinyoung left your side with a wink, that’s when you heard the first few notes of the song you longed to hear live again and you felt something begin to well up inside of you. With the whirlwind of emotions you were going through in such a short amount of time, all you could do at the moment was grin like an idiot as Jackson wrapped his arm around your shoulders and started rapping to you.

I’m not joking around, ever since I first got to know you I’m not the same person I used to be Whatever I’m doing, I don’t really know what I’m doing Whatever anyone says, I’m just blankly walking

You swayed to the beat and giggled as Jackson’s movements matched the lyrics. He was soon pushed away by Mark who playfully fought the younger boy for your attention as his part began.

You appear in my head every day Whatever I’m thinking about, you star in it Then with a zoned out face, I start talking to myself

Mark gave you a knowing look as his part ended. You looked at him suspiciously until you noticed Jinyoung kneeling down beside you and taking your hand once again. When you felt the heat transfer from his hand to yours, the moment seemed to go by in slow motion.

Why are you so pretty? When I look at you, when you’re smiling with your eyes It feels like I’ll faint

The audience’s screams now sounded distant, as if they were miles away. Everything around you—the other boys, the fans, the stage itself—seemed to disappear. You couldn’t bring yourself to look away from Jinyoung as he sang to you, the only thing tethering you to this earth being his hand enclosing yours. His voice was so sweet and almost pleading. During his part, he was giving you a look you couldn’t quite place.

You were brought back up to speed as Jinyoung left your side and was replaced by Youngjae, the performance continuing on without incident. You relished in the rest of the boys’ antics as they sang to you, Jaebum jokingly shooing them away when they were getting too friendly with you. At one point of the song, they had gotten into a formation, leaving a space for you in the middle so you could dance along with them.

Despite how much fun you were having and the warm feeling rolling through your stomach from the song, you couldn’t shake off the way Jinyoung had looked at you. The way he kept looking at you when your gaze met his. As you danced and sang along with the boys, you were silently deciphering Jinyoung’s expression.

It finally occurred to you as the song, and the concert, was coming to an end. Jinyoung reappeared by your side and looked you square in the eyes as he sang along to the last line.

He was looking at you like you were the only girl in the room.

He was looking at you with love.

It’s you, girl.

——

It was a little past midnight. Jinyoung had just finished taking a shower, a dull yet comforting ache set through his muscles. As he settled into bed, he reflected back on the tour. He couldn’t believe it had finally ended, culminating into tonight’s performance. Though he was excited to see his family and get some much-needed rest, he knew he was going to miss traveling and seeing the fans from different countries.

A few minutes turned into half an hour, and Jinyoung couldn’t get himself to fall asleep despite his exhaustion. Sitting up and putting on some slippers, Jinyoung shuffled out of his room. Ice cream sounded like a good idea, and he already couldn’t sleep, so what harm could some sugar do to his sleep? Usually he’d bother one of the other members to come along with him, but they had all dispersed after a small team celebration for finishing the tour. He, Jaebum, and Mark had decided to hit the sack while the others wanted to hit the clubs. Jinyoung stopped in front of your door before he completely passed by your room. He contemplated knocking and asking if you’d like to come, but eventually decided against it. Perhaps you were sleeping too.

After heading to the ice cream shop in the lobby and getting the one treat to satisfy his craving, Jinyoung was about to head back to the suite when he heard someone call his name. You were sitting on a love seat near the shop, alone and cup of ice cream in hand. Judging by your pajamas, it seemed you couldn’t sleep either.

Jinyoung made his way over to you. “Did you have a craving too?”

“Something like that,” you replied, glancing down at your cup.

Not knowing what else to say after a moment of silence, Jinyoung gave a little wave before beginning to walk away. “Well, good night.”

“Is that all you’re going to say to me?” Though there was a hint of attitude in your voice, you were looking at him confused yet expectantly. “Jinyoung, what are we doing? What were you doing?”

Jinyoung stared back at you pensively for a moment before hesitantly taking a seat next to you. “You know I’m not the best at talking about myself. I can be a little slow with these things.”

“I’ve got time. I can wait here all night.”

Jinyoung sighed after realizing you'd seriously sit in silence for hours until he said something. There you were, always the persistent one. He tried to focus on his ice cream. Every time he glanced up at your big eyes, the words he’d built the courage up to say would die on his lips.

“Do you remember when I took you to your school dance?” Jinyoung suddenly asked after another moment of silence.

“Huh?” Now you weren’t expecting him to say that. You sneered a bit, deciding to play along. At least he was finally opening up, if even only a little. “Do I remember? You say it as if it happened years and years ago.”

“It’s been, what, four or five years? With everything that’s happened to us in between, it feels like a lifetime ago.”

You nodded in agreement. “I guess you’re right, but what about it? Oppa pretty much forced you to go and you were going with me, so you had an awful time.”

Jinyoung grimaced at your words, vaguely remembering how the past him so vocally opposed taking you to your dance as if it would kill him, but he continued. “I did have an awful time, but it wasn’t necessarily because of you.”

You scoffed a little. “Jinyoung, we can be honest with each other. I know you found me annoying. Still do...” You trailed off quietly.

“I don’t!” Jinyoung protested earnestly, nearly dropping the ice cream from his cone. “Truly! Okay maybe I wasn’t too fond of you in the beginning, you were always following us around and being pesky. You spit water at me when you first met me!”

You attempted to keep stern and hold back your laughter at his uncharacteristic outburst, but your face said otherwise. “It’s not my fault, you told a really funny joke.”

Your slight break in resolve caused Jinyoung to smile back at you, but he quickly looked away again, remembering the repercussions of looking at you for too long. His face became serious once again. “Anyways...since then and throughout the training the days, I guess I just saw you as—”

“Your friend’s annoying little sister who had a thing for you.”

“Yes,” he confirmed regretfully. “But somewhere along the way, I just-you kind of...” His eyes darted around as if searching the room for the right words to say next. “...You know this is kind of dumb—”

“Please keep going,” you encouraged softly, almost begging him. Jinyoung forced himself to look at you, pursing his lips before continuing.

“Somewhere along the way, you started looking different. And you seemed different. Suddenly whenever you were around, I started feeling more uncomfortable than annoyed by you, and I didn’t know what to make of it until Jaebum was blackmailing me to go to the dance with you.”

All you could do was stare back at Jinyoung, unable to even react to his words as you were slowly processing. This was all news to you. You made him uncomfortable? You always thought it was just the other way around.

“Then Jaebum started talking about how he trusted me the most out of all the boys to take you to the dance because I was basically family and you know how protective Jaebum is of you, he basically threatens any guy who just looks at his little sister for more than five seconds—so you can see that just being your date was kind of a stressful thing for me...”

“Jinyoung,”

“...A-and you know our career was just about to take off and you had just gotten into the university of your dreams halfway across the world so it would have been really unfair to you if I even tried anything, also really dangerous with management, you already know that, and so I thought it would be better for me to just forget about it and avoid you as much as possible but seeing you in person this week, it was just too much for me and I didn’t know how to handle it so I guess that’s why I came off as cold and—”

“Jinyoung.” You cut him off firmly. “What exactly are you talking about right now?”

“Oh, I, uh—”

“D-do you like me? Or...?”

You’d said it. Those words had actually left your mouth. You could have punched him in the gut and Jinyoung would have reacted all the same, the air and words knocked right out of him. Jinyoung had confidently performed for thousands of people all around the world, but sitting next to you at that moment, he had never felt more unsure of himself.

To his surprise, you were looking at him with pure curiosity rather than scrutiny, and that was enough for him to keep going.

“That night you saw me talking with Mark-hyung...you had it all wrong...” He paused hesitantly but you nodded encouragingly for him to continue. He took a deep breath, willing himself to exude confidence as he exhaled. “You know what actually drives me crazy? How you seem to appear in my head every day and there’s nothing I can do about it. Believe me, I’ve tried,” he mused almost regretfully. “How talented you are—that cookie was amazing by the way,—and how good of a dancer you are, how kind you are, h-how pretty you are...”

“Wait I’m sorry, could you repeat that last part? You got quiet at the end.”

Jinyoung gave you an deadpanned look. You looked back at him innocently, but you were clearly enjoying this. He bit back a smile at your amusement. “Did you know that when you smile, your eyes do too? They turn into these little crescents.” He traced small semi-circles over his eyes.

“You mean like this?” You beamed at him, your eyes almost disappearing as your smile grew.

“Yes, like that.” Jinyoung groaned. “Cut it out, it’s distracting. That’s why it’s hard putting up with you. There’s those things that you do and you’re not even trying.”

“Jinyoung...” Your smile faded as you stared back at the boy in awe. You had never seen Jinyoung look so shy and vulnerable before. He wasn’t joking at all.

“The truth is I don’t hate you. Far from it actually. I hate me because I’m supposed to hate you but I could never,” Jinyoung sighed, gazing at you softly. “You deserve to be loved openly. I felt guilty about not being able to, so I thought it would be easier to try finding faults in you, reasons to dislike you, but there was never anything wrong with you.”

“You’ve never outright said anything rude to me before,” you realized out loud. “You just kind of avoided me like the plague.”

“I hated being cold to you. I hated seeing you plaster a smile on your face when I brushed you off.” Jinyoung gave you an apologetic look. “But I figured you were okay. If I wasn’t making you happy, at least the other boys were.”

“What do you mean?”

"You know, like how you’re always joking around with Bambam or hanging out with Jackson. You seem happy with them.”

“Yes, that’s typically what friends do,” you replied sarcastically with an incredulous expression.

“I saw you heading down with Jackson a few nights ago,” Jinyoung mentioned offhandedly, trying to seem nonchalant. “You two were all close and hugging, I just kind of assumed something was going on there—”

“Jinyoung, are you jealous?”

“No! I just, uh—” He quickly went back to finishing his ice cream, buying time to put together a response.

“I’ll have you know that what you were seeing was him comforting me after I told him about you!” You said accusingly. “I had heard you telling Mark how hard it was putting up with me and then the next day, you acted like we were the best of friends! So yeah, that was going to make me confused and upset. Luckily Jackson was there and nice enough to let me talk to him about how I felt. That’s what you were seeing.”

“Oh.” What else could Jinyoung say? He felt like a—

“Fool,” you muttered under your breath, rolling your eyes. “You know for someone smart enough to be trusted by Oppa, you’re kind of stupid. And you’ve got ice cream all over your face.” You grabbed some napkins from your pocket and wiped around his mouth without a thought.

“Thanks,” Jinyoung nearly whispered, unable to make eye contact with you once again. He felt a warmth creeping up his neck.

“So...you still haven’t answered my question,” you spoke up, realizing he wasn’t going to say anything else.

“Question?”

“I asked if you liked me.”

“Do you really need to ask?” Jinyoung groaned as you nodded, a small smile inching its way onto your lips. He sighed. “Mark-hyung did tell me to be upfront with you.”

“And Jackson?”

“What about about him?”

“I noticed you two talking before the concert and you guys would look over at me,” you said nonchalantly as you took a bite of ice cream. “You two weren’t exactly the best at being inconspicuous. So what did he tell you?”

“He was the one who came up with the idea of the encore,” Jinyoung muttered with his head down. “He said that since I’m not good at talking about my feelings, everyone could help me sing them to you instead.”

“I’d still like to hear you say it out loud,” you urged softly with a melodic giggle.

How could Jinyoung say no to his favorite song?

“Okay, so I do tell you how I feel,” Jinyoung supposes. “And then what? After how awful I’ve been to you all these years, it would be unfair for you to just accept me wholeheartedly.”

You gave him a funny look, eyebrow raised challengingly. “No, it would actually be unfair for you to tell me how you really feel after years of thinking you hated me, and then for you to not do anything about it. I’m not accepting you wholeheartedly. I’m accepting you as punishment for, as you said, how awful you’ve been all these years,” you chided with a teasing smile. “Here, I’ll even go first. I like you, Jinyoung. Always have, but you already knew that. Now...” You looked at him expectantly with slight head nod, silently telling him it was his turn.

Jinyoung sighed before slowly getting up from the seat. He held his hand out to you without a word and you took it questioningly, hesitantly standing up to meet his gaze. He took a deep breath and uttered your name as he exhaled, as if saying it lifted a great weight off of his shoulders. He gently took both of your hands in his.

Looking you square in the eyes, Jinyoung spoke up. “I...I lik—”

Before he could finish his confession, you had gotten up on your tip-toes and lightly brushed your lips against his. They were gone almost as instantly as they came, but the ghost of your kiss lingered on his lips. You giggled once again as you watched Jinyoung’s fingers graze over his lips. His eyes widened at you in awe, a slight blush creeping over his cheeks.

“You just-all of a sudden—”

“Actually, you don’t need to tell me, I already know,” you joked, beaming at Jinyoung once again. You almost felt sorry for interrupting him, you had never seen him look so flustered before you.

But with your eyes shining like that, how could he get upset?

Jinyoung chuckled and smiled down at you as he lightly reached out to tuck some hair behind your ear. Now it was your turn to blush profusely.

“Good, because, like I said, I’m kind of slow in saying these things and I might need some time.”

As the two of you just stood there smiling like idiots for who knows how long, you both knew you’d have all the time in the world.

——

“You were right, red does suit me!”

Jinyoung stood from his seat and smiled as you approached him, twirling around so you could give him a better look at your outfit.

“I’m glad I chose well. How are the shoes?”

“Just right,” you replied happily, glancing down at your wedges. He walked around the table to pull out your seat. “Oh, you don’t have to—”

“I want to,” Jinyoung completed. He gently placed a hand on the small of your back to usher you into your seat before settling back into his.

“Thank you. And do you know what suits you, Jinyoung?”

“What’s that?”

“Winning,” you answered mischievously, motioning to two boys dressed in white button-ups and black pants walking over to your table.

“Hyung, the fans only voted for you because you were partnered with Noona,” Bambam complained as he poured water from a pitcher into both of your glasses.

“Yeah, if I was with Noona, you’d be serving me today instead,” Yugyeom added ruefully, placing silverware on your table.

“You and Mark should have tried harder,” Jinyoung teased as he downed his water. “Refill please, slave.”

Bambam muttered obscenities under his breath as he begrudgingly complied before turning to you. “You look especially pretty today, Noona.”

You giggled at his sweetness despite his misfortune. “Aww, thanks Bam.”

“Yeah Noona, has anyone ever told you that color looks good on you?” Yugyeom asks.

“She knows,” Jinyoung nearly growled, shooting the younger boys a dirty look. “Don’t you need to be in the kitchen right now? You’re here to serve us, not talk.”

Bambam and Yugyeom mock-bowed before leaving the table. “Let’s make sure to spit in Hyung’s food.”

“What was that?”

“Nothing!”

You and Jinyoung looked at each other and laughed, shaking your heads at the boys’ antics. When the staff said that the losers would have to serve as the winners’ slaves for a day and that the winners could make them do whatever they wanted, you didn’t know you’d be able to get the boys to basically set up your first (unofficial) date with Jinyoung. In front of a bunch of cameras and never explicitly stated that it was a date, but you were going to consider it your first date.

Jinyoung gazed at you admiringly, completely mesmerized as your skin glowed beneath the sunset. He considered this the first date too.

“A pretty rose for the pretty lady?” Mark had come up to the table with a basket of roses. He knelt by your side and offered you one.

“Oh you all flatter me too much,” you cheerfully accepted, instinctually smelling the rose. “Thank you.”

“How about a bottle of wine for the lovely couple?” Jackson appeared by Mark’s side, chilled bottle of red wine in hand. You and Jinyoung gave him a threatening look as Mark got up and nudged him.

“Cameras,” Mark whispered to Jackson, covering the mic on his collar.

Jackson laughed nervously. “Did I say lovely couple? Haha I meant winning couple. Wi-winning pair, I mean, which someone might use to refer to a couple, which means a group of two people in this case, not like a couple couple—”

Mark elbowed Jackson in the gut again. “We’re going to go check on your meals, but they should be out shortly. In the meantime, please enjoy the view and let Youngjae know if you have any requests,” he explains courteously, motioning to the boy over at the grand piano in the corner of the rooftop. Youngjae smiled at the both of you as his fingers gracefully keyed a mellow tune, setting the mood for the evening. With a short bow and knowing smirk, Mark left you two alone again, pulling Jackson along with him (but not without the younger boy waggling his eyebrows knowingly at you as he walked away.)

“Out of the seven billion people in the world, I was put into a group of seven with them,” Jinyoung joked as he opened the bottle of wine and started pouring you a glass.

“Hey! You’re just as goofy as them,” you playfully chided, clinking your glass with his. “You’re just a teensy bit better at hiding it.” As you took a sip, you noticed him staring at you curiously. “What?”

He gave you a blissful grin. “Nothing, just wish I could capture this moment.”

“Oh! We should definitely take a picture!” You brought out your phone and switched it to the front camera. You were about to turn around in your seat so you could capture the both of you when Jinyoung got up and crouched by your side. “Why so close?”

“The sun is shining this way and I guess I was just attracted to you,” Jinyoung stated, a playful glint in his eye. “One might say that you’re so magne—”

“Don’t even finish that thought,” you groaned at the lame attempt at a joke. “Cheesiness doesn’t suit you Jinyoung. Now smile!” Jinyoung placed his face next to yours and as you snapped a few pictures.

“Perfect!” You proclaimed, swiping through the photos.

“Yeah, you are.”

You turned to look at him, his face a mere inches away from yours so he could whisper to you. Jinyoung silently gazed at you just as he did at the concert and the rest of the world seemed to melt away once again. Just the two of you. Youngjae’s melody faintly played in the background as Jinyoung grinned at you. Forgetting about the cameras, your face subconsciously moved closer to his. “Jinyoung...”

Just as you two were about to cause an international broadcasting incident—

“Dinner’s ready!” Jaebum arrived at your table with a cart of food and pulled Jinyoung up. “Sir, please take a seat so you can eat comfortably.” Jinyoung, in his shocked state, let the leader pull him back around the table and firmly plant him back in his seat.

“Oppa...”

“I trust you will enjoy tonight’s special,” Jaebum stated grandly as he uncovered the dishes. “We have a couple of dishes here I think you’ll like. We’ll start off with the steak, or as I have named it on the menu, ‘you better not make a mis-steak.’” Jaebum scowled at Jinyoung as he placed the dishes in front of you. Your eyes darted back and forth between the two boys, praying in your head that you weren’t about to be a murder witness at that moment.

Jinyoung simply smiled at the leader, unfazed by his subliminal threat. “You can trust me, I’ll enjoy the meal.”

Jaebum silently glared at Jinyoung for a moment before sighing and giving him a resigned smile. “I know I can. Please eat, I hope it was worth the wait.” Jaebum gave you a wink and gently tousled your hair before walking away.

As the two of you dug in and you went into a story about a time you almost failed your microeconomics class, the words Jaebum head left him with lingered in Jinyoung’s head. You were definitely worth the wait. Despite the cautionary voices in the back of his head ordering him to keep away from you, he realized you were always the end to his decision.

It’s you, girl.

——

#got7 #got7 imagines #got7 scenarios #got7 fics #got7 fanfics #park jinyoung #im jaebum #mark tuan #jackson wang #choi youngjae #bambam #kim yugyeom #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fics #kpop fanfics

113 notes · View notes

starbudspresents · 5 years

Text

DGM 231 - Panthaleia’s Translation Notes

Hello, dear friends and fellow fans! We return to the rubble of Tumblr you with DGM 231, the first chapter of this new year. Thanks for sticking with us!

Please see below the cut for my translation notes and reactions, as per usual. If you have any questions, do feel free to come say hi on Discord at Panthaleia#9705. :3

The Novel I'm Not Writing About DGM & Buddhism

Oooooookay, first things first! The four bubbles across Allen's collar on the cover page say 生々流転 seiseiruten. When spelled 生生流転 (homophonous), it simply means "ever-changing," but when spelled the way it is here (fantastic catch, thank you so much @togaochi ♥), it's defined as "all things being in flux through the endless circle of birth, death, and rebirth; the circle of transmigration."

That concept is much more succinctly described by the Sanskrit term saṃsāra. Now, to preclude confusion: yes, if you look up "samsara" in a Japanese dictionary, you'll get 輪廻 rin'ne rather than this. That said, this term is if anything more specific and descriptive than that one. See also 生死輪廻 seishirin'ne, which has the exact same definition as seiseiruten; think "cell" vs. “cellular phone” vs "mobile telephone." All words for the same thing, with varying degrees of descriptiveness.

The concept of samsara shows up in several religions (notably Buddhism, Hindu, and Jainism). The one most relevant to DGM by far is Buddhism, and this is far from the first time I've run into it in search of answers.

Crash course on some Buddhist jargon for those of you who aren't familiar:

The word samsara, meaning "continuous flow," describes the beginningless and potentially endless cycle of life and existence, through birth and living and death to re-birth and so on. It could also easily be pictured as a helix, if you'd prefer, and that could in fact make some of DGM a little easier to understand.

(If I may take a moment to get super self-indulgent here: a very related philosophical concept is panta rhei, "everything flows", which is what my "panthaleia" handle is mostly based on. This chapter very nearly literally has my name written on it. IT'S A SIGN. Of.... something. Not sure what, exactly, but IT'S A SIGN.)

Every living thing is trapped within this cycle by its attachments and its ignorance of the truth, which causes great suffering and generates karma, which then affects the shape of one's next life. (Yes, Alma's second name is that for a reason.)

There are a number of branching denominations of Buddhism, much as there are of Christianity, and while they mostly share certain core tenets such as the Eightfold Path, they vary widely in ideals and practice. The influences I see on DGM mostly come from a Japanese variant called Shingon ("True Words") and its predecessors: Shingon is a descendant of Tibetan Vajrayana, which is in turn sometimes considered to be part of the broader East Asian Mahayana umbrella.

I've talked a little bit about Shingon before, because all the chanted spells used throughout the series follow the pattern of Shingon mantras and Kanda's tattoo is written in Siddhaṃ (theorized to be the predecessor of both modern kana systems, by the way).

Shingon shares its overarching goal with its predecessors: rather than seeking to break the cycle just for one's own self and achieve individual escape from suffering (as in Theravada, for example), one should seek to become an enlightened being — a bodhisattva — and willingly continue to subject oneself to the cycle in order to help those who are struggling and thereby bring the whole world closer to moksha ("liberation") and subsequent/synonymous nirvana one step at a time.

Obviously, reincarnation and transmigration play a massive role in DGM. Let me list just a few of the ways in which this particular concept is a running theme throughout the story:

The Noah fragments being reincarnated into new bodies without also reincarnating the human souls they previously coexisted with;

The Earl's victims having their souls transmigrated in the bodies of their loved ones to rebirth them as Akuma;

The Third Exorcists, also transmigrated into new bodies to bring them back (Helix magic in general, really, including the Atuuda);

Nea's transmigration into Allen (not a rebirth, but an avoidance of death while waiting for a chance at rebirth), as well as Allen's regression to childhood via de-aging and memory loss;

The original Earl (Adam in my theories, fyi, in case I reference that later) deliberately rebirthing himself in smaller pieces for goals as yet unknown;

The Bookmen keeping records of each iteration of the repeating narrative, ever-changing but eternal themselves;

Even fukkin Komlin, lmao, constantly destroyed and improved and remade.

So many others? Soooo many others.

The eureka moment (for me): this chapter is subtitled "Curtain Rise," as in the beginning of a stage play when the curtain goes up. If you'll think all the way back to the very first chapters of the series, you may remember that the Earl's Scenario is meant to bring about curtain fall... on humanity.

Looking at that in the context of samsara, that whole thing suddenly looks very different. Our heroes assumed that the Earl's victory would result in the destruction of the world, the destruction of humanity, but I've never bought that idea from the very start. When the curtains finally close on samsara, the cycle of death and rebirth, humanity will not be "dead" in the tragic sense, but free. Nirvana =/= death. Nirvana is the peace of being one with all, knowing all, loving and being loved by all without the need for suffering. It isn't "heaven" in the Christian sense, but it is an end to suffering, without also being an end to existence.

Tragedy and suffering are the consequences of remaining bound to the cycle. Directly using the energy of them in order to break the cycle creating them, as the Earl claims to be doing with the Akuma, is a very very Vajrayana idea, and fits seamlessly into my existing suppositions as to what the Earl is doing and why. Here, have a relevant quote:

Negative mental factors such as desire, hatred, greed, pride are not rejected as in non-Tantric Buddhism, but are used as part of the path. As noted by French Indologist Madeleine Biardeau, tantric doctrine is "an attempt to place kama, desire, in every meaning of the word, in the service of liberation."

And another, from the Hevajra tantra:

Those things by which evil men are bound, others turn into means and gain thereby release from the bonds of existence. By passion the world is bound, by passion too it is released.

One more, same source:

One knowing the nature of poison may dispel poison with poison.

Bluntly put, I think the (original) Earl was an enlightened soul — a bodhisattva — who voluntarily returned to the cycle via deliberate rebirth into multiple ignorant beings in order to help heal the struggling world of its suffering via bringing about enlightenment viiiaaaa SUFFERING HARDER. Good Plan™?

Here are a few more related meta posts from a few years ago, just so I can find them again when I inevitably decide to delve deeper into this:

Helix magic will be the key to the plot

It's all happened before

Destroyer of Time

2.) I'm so delighted to see Mana as he was when Allen knew him before, genteel and whimsical and delighted with Allen's existence. It's easy to understand why Allen would become so attached to him.

3.) Raws for the "Therefore I write many of them, as if God can see me doing so. / As if He might find me" lines: こうして神さまに見えるように沢山書くんです　／　見つけてもらえるように These don’t sit well with me, so I’ll probably change them in the future. The gist is that he’s drawing them in order to draw God’s attention to him.

Raws for "Here I am": 私はここにいる。@togaochi and I concur that he uses watashi here instead of his own preferred boku because he's teaching it to Allen, and means it as a more general "I."

Anyway: hooooo boy, here's some more evidence for the Two Gods theory. And how!

It seems pretty safe to assume he's not calling out to the Order's God, since that god would pretty happily wipe him off the face of the earth. The Noah have called that god "false," though, and expressed their intent and desire to kill it, while still referring to a "God" entity of their own whom they regard as being on their side (or perhaps, they're on its side).

Mana calling out to the Noah god to come find him, without remembering why he wants that, is very interesting. I wonder if and how anyone answered him.

4.) I have a strong hunch that Mana's "secret alphabet" is also related to Siddhaṃ, but that language is written in such a complex way that it's actually impossible for me to be sure without just... learning it. Which! To be clear! I fucking well might. WATCH ME.

5.) This entire scene is so much to me. How furious they both are that the other won't just let themselves be saved/protected. Allen wanted to leave Kanda behind so he and the others would be safe from everything that's hunting him. Kanda wants Allen to stay put so they can save him from what he can't fight alone. All that rage and frustration, because they care.

Quick note: in the first draft we initially posted on Imgur via our Discord server, I had the subject wrong for one of Kanda's lines here, which I caught and fixed. Sorry for any confusion that may have caused!

5.5) ETA: Forgot to mention that I’m fairly sure the beautiful Grecian-style temple they’re hanging out in is referenced from St. Bernard’s Well, again in Edinburgh. Excuse me, “Edinston.”

Thanks to an enterprising anon, we have a much better match for that structure: the Dugald Stewart Monument!

6.) "maybe I'll go sucker-hunting" CARD SHARK ALLEN LIIIIIVES, where's Tyki when you need him (to lose his shirt again)

7.) fjkldjlkagd the turnaround where Allen finally cracks and is like "fine!! you want in?? IN YOU GET. no take-backsies! happy now???" and Kanda's like "yep, here I am" and neither of them have ANY IDEA how to deal with ANY OF IT. Kanda struggling to pull Allen's story out of him without throwing up his hands and quitting. Allen baffled and twice as guarded as before, put off by Kanda's uncharacteristic interest.

So beautiful, it brings a tear to my eye. (Actually, many tears. So... so many tears.)

8.) That apology, which I never thought I'd get, for Allen having seen what Kanda would never have consented to show him. It wasn't his fault, and they both know that, but the fact still remains that it was a violation, and I've always always wished for that to be addressed somehow and HERE IT IS. RIGHT HERE.

I want to tattoo that look on Kanda's face onto my brain.

9.) And then they're FUCKING INTERRUPTED, AGAIN

But Allen's "ask me again when we're done dealing with this" was such a promise of trust that I can't even be that mad, augh.

Onward to the bitter end, I guess!! Haha!!!! · ͜͜ · -

Thank you all so much for reading and following along! I’d like to tip my hat to Kougeki Scans, who love this series too and are helping us spoil the fandom rotten. :P Again, if you have any questions or comments, feel free to either find us on Discord HERE, find me on Discord at Panthaleia#9705, or use the comment box on MangaDex! I’m always happy to geek out with fellow fans. <3

#dgm 231 #dgm231 #dgm #d gray man #dgm meta #panthaleia

106 notes · View notes

calsmusecollection · 4 years

Text

RULES.

repost , don’t reblog ! tag 10 ! good luck !

TAGGED. Found it on an old blog TAGGING. Whomever wants to

For The Outsider

This has been in my drafts for SO long, and I just am tired of it being there. So I just filled out any easy questions I’d skipped and crossed out the others. I’m sorry it’s not done but it’s been avoided for like a year so... yeah...

BASICS.

FULL NAME :

The Outsider, Sanct

NICKNAME :

Black Eyed Bastard, Black Eyed Devil, Black Eyed Groom, Whale Satan

AGE :

17/4000+

BIRTHDAY :

The calendar was different than. Roughly speaking it’s the 20th day in the Month of Rain that he was born human and the Fugue Feast when he merged with The Void

ETHNIC GROUP : ///// NATIONALITY : Pandyssian LANGUAGE / S : Yes. All. As a human he only knew one and it has long since died out SEXUAL ORIENTATION : human: Homosexual, Void: Demisexual (generally only his Marked) ROMANTIC ORIENTATION : human: Homoromantic, Void: Demiromantic (Generally only his Marked) RELATIONSHIP STATUS : Single CLASS : human; destitute, Void; beyond such human designations HOME TOWN / AREA : The town’s name was lost to time. It was on the Southern part of Pandyssia CURRENT HOME : Void- seems to be taking a particular interest in Dunwall/Gristol PROFESSION : Boredom.

PHYSICAL.

HAIR :

human; yellow-going toward white, Void; Black, Post-void Human: Black

EYES :

human; clear blue, Void; Black including where the whites should be. Some people imagine specks of light, or fire in them. He’d deny anything that wasn’t pure black, Post-void Human: Light blue green

SCARS

pre-void-human; too many to count, Void; none, post-void-human verses; a scar that goes across his neck as though to sever both arteries, scars on either wrist indicative of being bound

TATTOOS :

Nope

HEIGHT :

5′6″ (short Void is short)

((I looked up the average height of people in 2000 BCE which would be roughly 4000 years ago if I can do math, and in fact the number I came up with was 5′3″ for men but the sample size is small. The average for the Roman army was 5′7″.))

WEIGHT :

120lbs??

(I dunno I’m really bad at weight...)

BUILD :

Slender

FEATURES :

Nothing special

ALLERGIES :

None really

USUAL HAIR STYLE :

Messy. Not in a deliberate way. More of a ‘what’s a brush?’ sort of way...

USUAL FACE LOOK :

A neutral expression that airs on the side of criticism or confusion.

USUAL CLOTHING :

Dark pants and dark boots and a dark jacket over a white shirt. He wears rings on some fingers. Silver. Which he is loath to contemplate parting with.

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEAR / S :

He’d tell you he’s beyond such emotion. But he is rather scared of no longer existing. Death maybe. But more than that.

ASPIRATION / S :

None

POSITIVE TRAITS :

NEGATIVE TRAITS :

MBTI :

ZODIAC :

TEMPERAMENT :

SOUL TYPE / S :

ANIMALS :

Whales. Rats

VICE HABIT / S :

Stalking the Marked, Being needlessly ominous, sweet food

FAITH :

He once worshiped the Leviathan. He’s learned to worship nothing

GHOSTS ? :

Eh. Trapped spirits maybe

AFTERLIFE ? :

Nope. Just Void

REINCARNATION ? :

Nope. Just Void

ALIENS ? :

Why not? Though he’s not seen any

POLITICAL ALIGNMENT :

Humans are so... stupid. To think such things last

ECONOMIC PREFERENCE :

He’s beyond such things

SOCIOPOLITICAL POSITION

Annoying god-like being

EDUCATION LEVEL :

Zero... or... all of eternity? It’s hard to pinpoint

FAMILY.

FATHER :

Unknown

MOTHER :

Unknown

SIBLINGS :

none

EXTENDED FAMILY :

Unknown

NAME MEANING / S : Outsider- a person who does not belong to a particular group.

Sanct- Ghost

FAVOURITES.

BOOK :

The Young Prince of Tyvia

MOVIE :

5 SONGS :

Drunken Whaler

DEITY :

Himself. He loves himself the most.

HOLIDAY :

Fugue Feast is always entertaining

MONTH :

Month of Rains probably

SEASON :

Summer

PLACE :

Seaside

WEATHER :

Stormy, just before the sky opens up and it starts to rain

SOUND :

Whales singing, Steal clashing,

SCENT / S :

The sea on a warm day, fruit tarts

TASTE / S :

fruit tarts, sweet drinks

FEEL / S :

Ocean waves crashing on the shore, the feel of a breeze, the warmth of touch

ANIMAL / S :

Leviathan and rats

NUMBER :

COLOUR :

Blues

EXTRA.

TALENTS :

BAD AT :

TURN ONS :

“You Fascinate me”

TURN OFFS :

Predictability

HOBBIES :

TROPES :

AESTHETIC TAGS :

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 : if you could write your character your way in their own movie , what would it be called , what style would it be filmed in , and what would it be about ?

A1 :

The Outsider doesn’t deserve a movie. But if he had one it would have some sort of one-word title that helped no one guess what it was about. Like.. “Time” or “Forever”. It would be some sort of ridiculous indie film that is trying so hard to intellectual that all concept of linear storytelling is lost. Symbolism takes the place of narrative. And you leave the theater feeling as if you’ve lost days instead of a mere hour. It’s supposed to be about what it’s like to be him in the Void. And maybe it is. No one can be certain.

Q2 : What would their soundtrack / score sound like ?

A2 :

Ethereal for want of a better term. With that sort of undercurrent of creepy as shit. The sort of music that either has no lyrics or the lyrics contain no chorus. It’s just this story that’s being sang in airy tones over deep music.

Q3 : why did you start writing this character ?

A3 :

He wouldn’t leave me alone. I tried to get my bff in rl to finish the game and save me from The Outsider but they never did and I had no choice but to find someone else to satisfy him.

Q4 : what first attracted you to this character ?

A4:

He’s.... neat? I dunno. I played the first game and I think I only got through some levels because I kept telling myself that there would be another shrine if I could just get to it. How I get my muses is dumb. They show up in my head and declare themselves deserving of my time >.<

Q5 : describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse.

A5 :

How disconnected he is. Like he can seriously upset someone and not even register that he did. And that’s the antithesis of me and it hurts me every time.

Q6 : what do you have in common with your muse ?

A6 :

We think people are interesting? That’s... about it...

Q7 : how does your muse feel about you ?

A7 :

He tells me I play him wrong. No matter how I play him. It’s always wrong. And he hates his backstory. And he wants me to be more cryptic. And. And. And. -_-’ He’s a judgmental little brat.

Q8 : what characters does your muse have interesting interactions with ?

A8 :

Everyone? I think I really love him dealing with people who don’t have marks a lot.

Q9 : what gives you inspiration to write your muse ?

A9 :

I rewatch the clips of going to the shrines for one thing. And I have a few songs that remind me of him. And I I just... I guess you’d call it meditate? I zone out for a few moments and try to clear my mind of anything that isn’t void.

Q10 : how long did this take you to complete ?

A10 :

.... shhhhhh... some questions need no answers....

#long post #Headcannon: Outsider

1 note · View note

callie-the-snarky-geek-blog · 5 years

Text

RvB16 Episode 2 Review: Incendiary Incidents

(Old Blog Repost)

Last time, not a lot happened other than going out for food, Donut unlocking his true potential as a contortionist, and alien Norse Gods are a thing that exist. Nothing that unusual for this show. We got the setup, so what’ll they do with it now as the pizza quest continues? Lets find out!

Overview

To the shock of no one, Grif crashed the ship. He rushes everyone through the insults and sidenote to Kai’s… so does she actually have regular contact with their mom? Makes me really wonder about where Grif stands with his family. Anyways, good news is the pizza place isn’t far off! They just have to go through some ominous woods! Grif however opts to go through the less than ominous woods which would take longer, but isn’t… well, ominous. This gets Simmons attention. Enough that, as they make their way through, he pulls Grif aside to find out what his deal is. My shipping heart is happy to see Simmons noticing that something’s not right with his not-boyfriend and getting to the bottom of it… please tell me I didn’t accidentally write an innuendo,

So you knwo that ‘new science’ Grif mentioned last episode? Well here’s that new science: laziness… sort of! So when stuck on the moon (I THINK he called it Iris? So… after Michael and Lindsay’s daughter/Geoff’s goddaughter? AWW!), Grif found a book that Jax left behind about story structure. He found out about ‘incendiary incidents’, which are incidents that jumpstart a plot essentially I tried to look it up to see if that’s an actual term… and all I got was a bunch of fire safety websites. But I’ll take Joe’s word for it and say it’s an actual term. So Grif cutting off Jensen before, crashing the ship deliberately as it turns out due to a message from Locus, and avoiding the ominous woods is to avoid getting into an incident that would jumpstart a plot, and therefore lead them into another adventure. IDK if this is clever fourth wall breaking but… wow. WOW. Even Simmons gets chocked up about how much effort Grif put into doing nothing. It’s counterproductive when you think about it, but still!

Unfortunately for Grif, he IS in a webshow with plot structure and the powers to be aren’t going to let them get out of it that easy. Caboose discovered a glowing lake. And a figure emerges form it. Now the episode summary describes a thought to be deceased team member returning. Oh my Gd, that… that’s crazy! It could anyone! But why?! Tex? Flowers? Shelia? Church? Alpha Church? Yellow Church?! The guy who got killed during one of those 360 videos?! The possibilities are endless! It could be anyone! Who knows what kind of shocking twist it cou.. it’s Donut. Who we all knew was alive. Yeah… well I’ll give them this, it had me hyped for the episode.

So Donut… Jesus Christ. No, seriously, Donut is now Jesus. He walked ont he water for crying out loud! Donut says that he had been taken through time and that they have to go into the past to stop a great danger… and absolutely no one buys it. Now to be fair, Simmons makes a good point later. They already went through a time travel story and it turns out it was just a simulation. So them being skeptical about this happening again, especially since only Caboose saw the body horror last episode and I imagine that he forgot by now, is pretty understandable. But yeah no one buys it and Grif feels relieved about avoiding the story bomb… until Simmons points out that refusing the call is an actual story trope. See Grif? There’s no escaping!

So the Reds and Blues make it to ton and… yeah, it’s been totaled. After talking to Jeremy Dooley… I-I mean a cop… no, I’m 90% sure that was Jeremy. Anyways! After that, Donut tries to convince them of time travel again, and this time has actual proof. He has this new gun which he uses to open a portal to a few days earlier. How did he get this? Well to put it simply, after he got hit by Loco’s machine he got sent back in time and his body got wrecked, but God found him and fixed him. IDK if he means the Christian God or one of these alien Gods, but they’ve picked the Reds and Blues to be his time traveling warriors and has sent back four more guns for them to use to go back in time with. The portals can also only fit two grown humans at once.

Unfortunately, things go downhill quickly. So you guys remember the four armed guy from the trailer? Well the sky goes dark and he appears… oh sorry, typed that wrong. I mean that SHE appears. Yes everyone, we have a legit female villain at last!! I couldn’t get her name, but part of it sounded like Callie… which is my name… UGH… anyways! Yeah, she starts causing chaos and destruction. Donut uses a bubble shield, telling the others to use the portal guns and get away. They comply with everyone pairing off: Cabbose and Lopez, Tucker and Sister, Grif and Doc, and Sarge and Simmons. Donut remains behind, though I assume that he’ll follow them later. Huggins, who has been following the group, chases after Grif and Doc by going through their portal. We follow Sarge and Simmons as they land in… what looks like ancient Egypt. Could be wrong, but we’ll have to wait and find out cause that’s the end of the episode!

Review

Well all of that escalated quickly!

So… gonna talk about Grif first! Cause yes, he’s getting a character arc! I mean I guess it could have ended here since his plan failed, but since Huggins went after him and Doc we could get something on that front. Anyways, so I was right and Grif is actively trying to keep them out of getting into adventures. To the point that he’s putting effort into maintaining laziness… that’s the kind of logic I expect form this show. It wasn’t how I expected it, but I expected it. It’s also good to see that he does still have some hangups from the moon. He seems a lot more… what’s the word? High-strung than normal? He’s also still talking in pretty large bursts compared to normal. I don’t know if that’s just me reading into it too much, but it seems like Joe is trying to show that Grif still has hangups from his self-exile. Which hey, if it means more Grif focus, I am not complaining!

The episode is more about plot than the last one. Last week was the setup, and now the payoff is here. So first, Donut. He was written SO WELL. One of the issues last season was that Donut was pretty much a background prop and they even forgot to put him in scenes. Joe must have realized that this was a problem cause he’s already fixing it BIG TIME. Donut’s had shit happen man! He comes off as slightly mroe serious and competent in a sense that he actually knows the gravity of the situation. But he still feels and acts like Donut, which is good! It shows that he CAN be useful and competent, but without sacrificing his personality. Heck he only spouted out one innuendo and it was just to prove that it was really him. I am digging this new direction!

So turns out that the four armed guy si a terrifying alien goddess of death… I dig it! So someone pointed out that this character is similar to Hela from Thor: Ragnarok. SO it REALLY seems like Joe is basing the villain off Norse mythology… or just the Marvel Cinematic Universe verisons of them. Either way is fine. So I’m not sure if… Kali-Ra I think is her name? Anyways it doesn’t seem like she’s with the same group as Huggins cause I imagine that she would have reacted. I also don’t think that this chick is the main villain since DOnut referred to a ‘devil man’, but still she is terrifying and badass and I LOVE it. We finally got a female main villain guys! Joe is the hero we’ve waited for! Yay! Also Sarge asking he rot marry him, Of course he’d want to marry a violent death goddess… I’ll totes ship this!

Alright, time travel! SO ever since Joe mentioned it in that post a while ago, I’ve… been skeptical. Time travel in pretty much every show tends to be confusing and create tons of plot holes. It even happened in RvB before with Season 3 before Burnie retconned it as a simulation. Didn’t save my head from imploding, but still that’s a fair excuse. Hopefully Joe has a VERY good idea on what he’s doing with this, but I’ve been warming up to the idea since then. It’ll be fun to see the guys in different time periods at least! Form how it looks, Sarge and Simmons may go tomb raiding it it really is Ancient Egypt. I mean Sarge vs mummies, there is no way that cannot be epic!

So the gang is being split up, and the pairs are interesting! Sarge and Simmons sin’t that much of a surprise and tbf it’s been a long time since they had some one-on-one time. Simmons has also grown out of being a kissass quite a bit, so it’ll be interesting to see how that goes. Caboose and Lopez are together… so I’ just going to assume that in every animated RT production, Burnie is just meant to be stuck with/get annoyed with Joel in one way or another. Cause that is the impression I’m getting. Tucker and Sister are together, so I imagine flirting… okay I’m good with that! Hopefully Sister gets some focus to herself that isn’t just Tucker trying to hit on her, but still I’m good with this!

And finally Grif and Doc… that one is gonna be interesting. Grif in particular seems very grudgey against Doc for the betrayal and we just saw Doc save Grif form getting crushed by tackling him into the portal. Which props to Doc for that BTW. Still with that and since they’re 100 on an adventure now, Grif’s not gonna be a happy camper. Also if O’Malley gets active and starts going into Grif’s past issues like in S13, I… imagine that’ll be rough for our favorite orange boy. Also Huggins chased after them, so I assume that they’ll be discovering her soon. Which if she pals up with them…t hat could be really cute tbh! I am all for Grif and Doc shenanigans with a a ball of light! But yeah, this could lead to a LOT of things and I’m very interested in seeing how this plays out.

Final Thoughts

It was great! Admittedly this is a lot mroe bizarre than RvB has been in a while but it’s also RvB where Grif still being alive after getting hit by a tank and having Simmons organs thrown into him improperly isn’t ever questioned. Alien Norse Gods? Ia m all for it! Donut being Jesus? Awesome! More setup for Grf having a character arc? HELL YEAH MAN. It was a well done episode, progressing the plot without wasting any time, gives us a glimpse at how dangerous our villains our, gives us a badass female villain, and sets up everything for the episodes ot come. There’s definitely a feeling of epicness compared to last time, so it looks lie Joe is taking the armature gloves off and giving us one Hell of a story. I am very excited to see where it leads!

#rvb #rvb16 #rvb reviews #old blog repost

3 notes · View notes

knightofbalance-13 · 6 years

Text

https://rampantlytyping.tumblr.com/post/174581718969/for-fuck-sake

“Oh, it gets worse. Because I’ve read the archives of KOB’s reddit account. (Link here for reference, someone may wanna archive this in case KOB pulls a Delete Fucking Everything)

Never before have I seen something that would backfire so hard.

First of all, I’d recommend a look at the very first comment on that Reddit account, which was a screed about FatManFalling’s Volume 3 review. So much of modern KOB can be traced back here- has hatred of the word “the” and insistence on trying to replace it with “teh,” his long paragraphs, condescending attitude and personal attacks/insults (Also, for the record, “Fatass” is one of the worst mocking nicknames I’ve ever see on Reddit).

Actually-

https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/5jdst1/cowardly_lion_taiyang_fanfiction/

This is. Thing is: this would HUMANIZE me. But god knows you can’t think of your opposition as human.

First is mischaractization.

Second is not a moral argument.

Third is conflating me being angry with who I am normally.

And fourth is downplayed since this whole post is nothing BUT a personal attack.

Also: Never said I was clever.

There’s also this post after Volume 4 which is basically “So the RWDE tag sucks amirite?”

No, the title is what I meant.

But a relevant comment that Caddeter and @psyga315 should see is this one. I’ll quote it directly, emphasis mine at the end:

Backfire in 3...2...1

“Now I know many of you are thinking “Why should I care?”

Well, because these people are in a dangerous mindset of ignoring everything that isn’t their opinion and warping that to justify their feelings.

I gave a comment on this journal pointing out the flaws in his work. The closest thing I said to an insult was saying that his usage of the term “man-pain” was stupid in any context. And when I admitted I wasn’t aiming towards him but his audience who weren’t sure about V3’s finale, he blocked me, deleted my comments (EDIT: he’s admitted to being wrong about teh previous two and has restored my comments. Still blocked but I have a way around it that he knows) and warped my words. Something he claimed Miles and Kerry did, minus the last part.

I ask of you: Say what you think about this. And not just the journal, what you thought of Pyrrha’s death. Not what he said, not what I said. But what you want to say.

Now GO!”

Now, if I was a generous man, this in context could be KOB asking for discussion on the Reddit.

I am not a generous man. To me, it looks like KOB deliberately inciting the Reddit post-Volume 3 (when they were most protective of RWBY as it was the last season that Monty would have definitely worked on) and encouraging them to dogpile the journal author.

Yeah...

Three things:

A. The time period this was made is post Volume 4, Not 3. So that’s bullshit.

B. https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/5khw9y/my_thoughts_on_pyrrhas_death_rwby_and_rt_by_jswf/dbo9z0v/

Oh hey look, there’s someone disagreeing witrh me and I ENCOURAGED them. So that’s also bullshit.

C. https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/5khw9y/my_thoughts_on_pyrrhas_death_rwby_and_rt_by_jswf/dboysk7/

Okay everyone, I have to ask that no one goes to the link and comments. The author is getting too stressed out by his debate with me and I don't want him to break.

So please, keep your discussions here.

Outright contradicted. Three strikes, you’re out.

And the worst thing? He had no empathy to the situation. Quote (again, emphasis mine):

“Well, don’t fight him. He’s…not right in the head.

Like I was arguing with him and he…wanted to kill himself.

And I didn’t even try being mean.”

Remember that in the Deviantart comments, KOB said that he could be “far far far crueler.”

As evidence by this post, where I am going to turn EVERYTHING against you. https://comments.deviantart.com/1/619991269/4290345087?offset=25#comments “*Sigh* Look, I never meant for you to get this stressed out. Hell, I understand where your coming from. Thinking about killing myself is such a common occurrence now I'm not even fazed by it anymore. So putting aside my feeling towards you and your conduct, I want you to listen to what i have to say: Your life matters. No matter what you think I've said, no matter what other people have said, no matter what you say, your life matters. You have friends and family who love and care about you and if you kill yourself, all it will do is wound those around you. It's painful I know but it's true. The best thing you can do is seek help above all else. Trust me, psychiatrists maybe be expensive by by divinty' sake they are miracle workers. And I know you're sick of hearing about this anime but really, look up Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. That anime is a large part of why I get out of bed in the morning even thought I know there's a very good chance I'll choke to death on my breakfast, lunch or dinner or that my life probably doesn't mean anything in the grand scheme of things. It taught me to keep moving forward no matter what I lose or what I suffer because there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The journey is hard and long but it's worth it. I never intended on hurting you. Had I known you were this psychologically fragile or you were this invested in Pyrrha I would have said nothing. I understand where you are coming from and I'm sorry I did so much damage to you. I was wrong and you were right. Good day.” No empathy huh? “Also while I’m here, how about this long callout post about RWBY Analysis after she was angry at some art from Dishwasher that had Enabler undertones (complete with the classic “I used to respect you” card which you can always imagine someone saying within the context “I used to respect you when you agreed with me.”). And here’s her reaction, which should be recorded alongside the Great Fire of London as one of the greatest burns in history.”

Ah yes, a callout post...Where I didn’t call her out once...

But I guess the actual post looks pretty fucking bad for you (https://knightofbalance-13.tumblr.com/post/172361707730/httpsrwby-analysistumblrcompost172345982047) since it is short and-oh yeah-SHE WAS SLANDERING SOMEONE. Good job completely missing the point eh?

But sure Knight of Balance. Tell us all about how you never meant for any of this to escalate and how sorry you were. It’s not like your own accounts show you to be a liar who instigated a harassment campaign and showed no empathy upon hearing that it was partially successful. You can surround yourself all you want with your little cabal of white knights like Sunder the Gold and MageKnight who will go to bat for you when they can. You can claim all you want that what you do is a crusade to purify RWBY and Make The FNDM Great Again or some bullshit like that because you seem to think that if you kill RWDE, Miles will personally fly out to thank you for saving RWBY. And you can even run to other fandoms like Darling in the Franxx or FLCL where your name isn’t poison. But we all know what you are.

I didn’t mean for thing to escalate as evident by how I TRIED TO STOP IT,

No empathy when I actively tried to call him down MYSELF.

That sounds pretty fucking ironic considering that you surround yourself in haters like Dudeblade and Cadder there who will never ever think to question you or themselves. But as for that Sunder thing.. Well I’ll get to that latter but let’s just say, it’s a show of self control how I’m not screaming my head off.

Oh and you’re any different? You probably think ‘I f I get rid of all the fanboys, M&K will HAVE TO listen to my obviously not biased criticism and I’ll Make RWBY Great Again! Then Monty Sempai will rise form the grave to thank me for saving his legacy!’

Please, I’d sit Miles down and give him a lecture on how a timeline is VERY important for a long running show and keeping time skips vague to ‘avoid plotholes’ would in fact make MORE of them. Though I’d probably force him to attend a writing class, Just because I respect the guy doesn’t mean I see him as flawless.

Yerah, doesn’t work when I did the EXACT SAME THING I did here in Franxx. I obviously do not care about my reputation worldwide.

Here’s the thing: I do not regret many things in my time on the internet. I regret not asking about internet customs so i could know things like alt accounts were a bad thing. I regret my raging outbursts at innocent people because I was an immature fuckhead. I regret interacting with RWBYcrit. ... That’s it. My fight against RWDE? My battle against shitty critics? I do not regret that one bit. I fought for what I believed was right and got to meet amazing people along the way. I think I’ve even grown as a person. So no dice bitch.

You’re a schoolyard bully with a stick and anger problems. You’re a child throwing a temper tantrum, unaware of how if Miles or Kerry saw what you’ve said and done, they’d be disgusted in you and would shame you for the world to see. You are nothing. In the grand scheme of life, this will be your legacy. You will never amount to anything significant in this lifetime, and your life peaked before you even hit your twenties. KOB, I really hope you realize how in just under two and a half years, you have made nearly the entire fandom hate your guts.

... And?

Oh you thought this was gonna hurt me? You think you saying I have anger issues is gonna hurt me when I’ve acknowledged that as one of my worst traits. You think telling me Miles and Kerry would be disgusted with me is gonna hurt me when I am not them, they are not me and I am fighting primarily for myself? You think you calling me worthless and saying I will never amount to anything in my lifetime when I’m a fucking existentialist AKA someone who believes that there is no inherent worth in life? Bitch, I say worse things about myself every day.

And the rest is either lies (the fandom as a whole, even on Tumblr, DOESN’T CARE ABOUT ME.) or shows you’re projecting onto me (’You’re a bully!’ says the bullies.)

Let me break this down: We all hate you on Tumblr,

God, stop projecting your ego onto me, I know the fandom as whole on Tumblr doesn’t care about me.

You haven’t shown your face on Twitter

https://twitter.com/KOB13x

Shows what you know.

and when someone cited you in a Reddit post, everyone warned them not to link to you because you’re a toxic influence.

Considering how you’ve been posting links throughout this whole post, why should I believe you if you suspiciously DON’T provide proof of this. And again: stop projecting your ego onto me.

For Christ’s sake KOB, FatManFalling can get his stuff posted on R/RWBY. It’s extensively mocked, yes, but it’s still allowed.

To the point it regularly gets kicked off reddit for having massive downvotes.

You’re so bad you haven’t even got that privilege. Let that sink in and realize what it says about you.

A. Proof

B. Not the same context.

And C. I don’t care.

Because this is coming from someone who tried throwing Sunder The Gold under the bus by saying he associates with me. DESPITE the fact that we haven;’t talked to each other in MONTHS. Why did you say this then? Oh right, Sunder is a fan of RWBY ergo he must be eliminated right? Because anyone who doesn’t conform to your fucking hivemind and treat the show AND ESPECIALLY the creators like shit is a heretic right?

That’s why I do this. Because you people are fucking AWFUL in every sense of the word. Everything you just tried to pin on me applies to YOU instead and then we can add on EVEN MORE and EVEN MORE DISGUSTING shit to that pile.I don;t like Steven Universe but I am JUST as disgusted by SU‘s fandom and it’s bullshit. This has nothing to do with RWBY anymore, this has to do with you people DESTROYING INNOCENT LIVES. That is YOUR legacy: the ruins of people’s lives and the destruction of a show people hold dear all because you decided to embody the WORST aspects of humanity.

In short: Fuck you.

Oh, PS:

https://knightofbalance-13.tumblr.com/post/162724070290/rampantlytyping-knightofbalance-13-hey

Guess you’re in the same boat as me eh?

#rampantlytyping

21 notes · View notes

amusewithaview · 7 years

Text

Amuse Reads the “Life and Death: a reimagining of the classic novel” (aka TWILIGHT GENDERSWAPPED) Chs. 3-5

Chs. 1-2

Let me just say, re-reading 1-3 again to refresh, that she sheer number of little snide digs at Renee make me so annoyed. It’s so pervasive and toxic. UGH.

Also, did I mention that the main character’s full name switched from Isabella to Beaufort? Not even Beauregard, Beaufort. WHERE DOES S. MEYER FIND THESE NAMES???

Ch. 3

So, first off, I was wrong and the excerpt only contained the prologue and (I believe) the first two chapters. I’m not going to go back and edit the original post because it’s old enough that I just don’t care. MOVING ON WITH THE PATERNALISM SHOW, I MEAN SHOW.

Seriously, all of the digs at Renee’s parenting are continuing and they are so much worse with Beau than I remember them being with Bella. Honestly, what S. Meyer is describing is neglect, essentially. I can’t tell if that’s what she was going for or not.

The Collision (yes, it deserves the capital) happens differently. Beau actually does hit his head pretty hard (he appears to have a mild concussion he does not have a concussion but he is clearly very dazed).

Also, Beau keeps describing Edythe’s eyes as ‘long.’ I have never before heard someone’s eyes described as ‘long’ and I’m having a hard time picturing this. Does S. Meyer mean wide? Does she mean they’re big like anime eyes? I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I need a more detailed description of Edythe’s eyes and their proportions with respect to the rest of her face.

Is Beau’s middle name Hannibal, or something? “...more beautiful than any movie star I’d ever seen. Like someone sliced up Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, and Marilyn Monroe, took the best parts, and glued them together to form one goddess.” Are you going to ask Dr. Cullen about her skin care regimen, Beau? Are you going to advise her to put on lotion or else she’s gonna get the hose again?

Beau has his first she’s so pretty when she’s angry moment. Why, S. Meyer, why.

We end the chapter with Renee again ‘hysterical’ over her child being in danger. Like, look, if somebody called my mom and told her I’d been in a car accident and that was it, then left her to stew in fear and concern for several hours, SHE WOULD BE UPSET. LIKE MOST MOMS. NOTHING HYSTERICAL ABOUT IT. I just. The language used to describe Renee bothers me so much.

Ch. 4

Beau comes off as actually a stalker when he talks about dreaming about Edythe and watching Edythe (but only from afar)? But he acknowledges this? It seems comparable to Bella’s level of creepitude (and she totally creeped on Edward).

Oh my god, Beau has mentioned that his attachment to Edythe and obsession with her might be unhealthy. I am so proud of him.

I find it interesting the way S. Meyer has changed all of the characters’ canon heights to ensure that the boys are all taller than the girls. Granted, a certain amount of sexual dimorphism is accurate, but basic genetics would dictate that most of the kids in a family would usually be of a similar height. She’s reaching, in my opinion, and I’m not sure why this was so important to her.

Beau is upset and also chopping onions. Is this connected? Is he secretly crying but also onions? Was this deliberate on S. Meyer’s part? Did someone hand her a pamphlet on literary techniques? More impressive, did she read it?

Forks has been upgraded from ‘prison’ to ‘purgatory,’ dear god, I had forgotten how melodramatic this character was.

“I didn’t get my balance issues from my mom.” I find this line puzzling because we never see commentary about Charlie stumbling or tripping or otherwise being clumsy. Also, he’s a goddamn police officer. A klutzy cop would literally be a walking, talking safety hazard. I take back what I said about S. Meyer learning things about writing. I mean, I suppose we could attribute this to the POV character being oblivious to anything not directly affecting them (and BS very much IS OBLIVIOUS), but still.

Pages 64 and 65 are kind of hard to unpack. A lot is happening here and it’s sufficiently different from the original that I’m thrown. In a nutshell: Beau is convinced that Edythe is mocking him with her hot and cold act and gets angry at her, her beauty, and the situation (angry at her beauty = yikes). This leads to him standing up for himself a bit more than Bella EVER did and actually walking away from Edythe, putting her in the chasing position. Edythe is actually chasing him, as in, she offers to drive him to Seattle for his big ‘avoid the dance’ book trip.

Basically, Beau has more self-esteem than Bella in some respects. S. Meyer has described it as Beau being less angry than Bella, but it’s honestly the exact opposite: Beau allows himself to be angry with Edythe and her treatment of him in a way that Bella didn’t at this point in their interactions. Also, Edythe is actually seeking Beau out openly in ways Edward didn’t.

IDK, it’s interesting. Weird, too.

Ch. 5

Genderswapped names, human edition!

Jessica = Jeremy Mike = McKayla Lauren = Logan Angela = Allen Eric = Erica Tyler = Taylor

Seriously, S. Meyer, WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET EDYTHE AND ROYAL?

Again, why are Edythe’s eyes described as ‘long.’ What does that even mean? Is this longitude or latitude, how big are Edythe’s eyes?

Beau is much more open to believing that Edythe is dangerous. I’m not sure how this fits into the overall depiction of Beau as different-from-Bella, but I think he’s more aware, in some ways. He has a broader perspective? Mind you, he’s still the most melodramatic teenager in existence (Zuko comes to mind as a more stable, less dramatic teen).

Edythe is unnaturally strong and it’s more obvious than Edward’s strength because S. Meyer made Edythe short instead of letting her keep Edward’s height. Also, Beau is significantly taller than Bella was. Beau is, in fact, almost as tall as Royal and Eleanor, for some reason. I really wonder why S. Meyer made the choice to make Beau so tall, or give him blue eyes instead of brown. These are the things that I look at and go, ‘This was a conscious decision, unlike some of the weird bias things that were probably just slipped in. WHY, though?’

WHY DOES S. MEYER THINK IT’S ABNORMAL FOR PEOPLE TO BE ABLE TO SMELL BLOOD? SHE’S A WOMAN WHO HAS HAD CHILDREN, PRESUMABLY SHE HAS EXPERIENCED MENSTRUATION. COULDN’T SHE SMELL THAT? IF NOT, SHE SHOULD GET HER NOSE CHECKED OUT BECAUSE THE INABILITY TO PROPERLY SMELL CAN INDICATE OTHER PROBLEMS. All caps because this point frustrates me for its sheer illogic.

Beau acknowledges that da little woman is stronger than him, but it doesn’t bother him because she’s probably stronger than everyone. Oh, and he’s secure because he’s big and strong enough to make people leave him alone now, as opposed to when he was bullied when he was younger (and significantly shorter).

Beau just described his mother as his ‘best friend?’ And I’m. What? You complain about having to talk to her at all, let alone offering her comfort when you have legitimately been in danger. If that’s how you treat your ‘best friend,’ then I wanna pull Edythe to one side NOW and tell her to fucking run.

Carlisle = Carine Esme = Earnest

Also, we’re at two more counts of backhanded ‘Renee was the adult on paper’ and Renee is ‘very young for her age’ and I am so done. I want like 50,000 words of Renee-centric fic right now. I just want her to be okay and away from her judgmental shitstain of a son.

That wraps up chapter 5, we get to meet lady!Jake in the next one!

#amuse watches media #twilight take 2: the regendering #team renee #this is probably less funny than the previous if only because my frustration is real #beau is an asshole #i dislike him more than i ever did bella

29 notes · View notes

a-travels · 5 years

Photo

taken: 10 aug, 2017 Tian Tan Buddha, Lantau Island, Hong Kong

baby don’t hurt me

Well, I thought I had written all I could on the topic of “love” last time, but I guess that just shows how dumb I am because that post opened up a few more channels in my mind that I was curious to explore/think through.

I’ll start off with a disclaimer that this post is most likely going to be about the philosophy of love or its base motivations or whatever. At least, that’s what I want it to be as I’m writing this sentence. Every post is pretty much thought up as I write so the end of this post could be very different from this point. Who knows. I’ve gone from talking about horses to snakes. Anything is possible when the writer as the attention span of a gerbil. But in the spirit of the disclaimer, I will try to stick to what I said.

What is love? In my effort to avoid making this a high school paper and following that question with the Oxford dictionary definition (though I don’t find my writing to be quite so far beyond that of a high schooler), I’ll tell you what the dictionary won’t: I don’t know.

Post over.

tl;dr - wtf is love lmk

No, in all seriousness, it’s something this week, in particular, I’ve been asking myself. To humor my weak-sauce STEM background, I’ll just mention the take that love is a series of chemical reactions in the brain that makes a member of the species want to procreate with another member of the species to pass on their genes. Sure, if you want to see love that way, by all means, go for it ya weirdos, but I don’t think it's fair to limit something so complex into the confines biology and chemistry. Love is a cocktail of biology, chemistry, and some of the most intricate, nuanced and deliberate animal behavior on the planet (like a honeybee’s exploding genitalia, yes it’s real). Love is not exclusively a human quality. Elephants, dogs, cats, I think even cows (don’t quote me), I believe demonstrate behaviors of love for members of their herd or their family. I can obviously only talk about the love from a human perspective, and not say from an elephant’s perspective because I am unfortunately not an elephant.

Love is flexible, and the way I see it, tiered in its delivery. The love you feel for a friend is different from the love for a sibling, which is different from the love for a parent, or teacher, or significant other, or an extended family member. You can also “love” a show, which is different from loving someone or you can “love” a certain food, which is different from “loving” a place you traveled. Each of those people or things elicit a different set of emotions and expectations. You tend to expect more from someone in your family than a friend. You expect different things from playing your favorite board game than visiting your favorite vacation spot. Every “love” you have demands a different feature-set and you tend to learn that just from living life, like the different tiers of a subscription plan or something.

Ultimately, I just see love as an expression of your connection to someone or something. A connection sounds fairly surface-level shallow, but what separates an association from an acquaintanceship from “love” is something more profound and deep. It’s that profundity or “it factor” that I can’t really wrap my head around. What is the threshold, the tipping point or moment that transforms something into something more?

Something I’ve been thinking about is how love expresses itself. How does one person convey that feeling to someone or something? Do you give them flowers and a heart-shaped box of chocolate? Do you go to your favorite restaurant and enjoy that food you love so much? Do you maybe take your future family to a place to visit that you loved when you were a kid? And how do you know when you’re loved? I think one of the most hallowed and time-honored traditions of expressing love for someone is at a funeral.

Ok before you think I’ve gone all emo on you, just hear me out (or don’t it’s your life). Kind of like how you’ll remember “the good times” but never realize it once they’re over, you never really understand that feeling for someone you care about till they’re really gone, sometimes. Especially with a family member with whom you’re close to, it’s sometimes taken for granted that they’re just someone in your life that has always been there. Their presence is comforting, but your feelings might be shrouded with a fog of their own, namely reality. You might get upset with someone sometimes, busy with your own life, move away, not talk to them for a few years and that feeling of love which you tell yourself is there isn’t always outwardly facing or something you overtly feel sometimes until that presence is gone.

I’ve talked to a few people about it, but I was mostly prompted on this post because two different family members passed away this week. It’s been interesting grappling with the different emotions I have towards each of them, as well as seeing my parents reactions, who were much closer to each of them, respectively, than I was. And I don’t make this post because my parents were hidden about their feelings towards the family member or nor, but mostly to see where my headspace is through all of this. Why do or don’t I feel the way I do?

This isn’t the first time I’ve dealt with the loss of a family member. I know what it feels like to lose someone close to me. It’s perhaps the only time I’ve cried till it hurt to breathe at a certain point. It didn’t hurt more to lose them but more to realize the inevitability of it all. If not now, then it would have been later. No matter how many more years I had with them, it would eventually come to an end. It hurt to feel helpless, especially when as kids we’re taught our whole lives to be the masters of our own destiny. And yet, you can’t control death and you’re just left questioning everything. Why now? Why not later? Why them? Why didn’t I wake up early on the weekends to speak with them one last time?

I didn’t mean to subject you to more emo Anant, but briefly touched upon the emotions I felt when I lost someone I deeply loved and cared about. And of course, I feel terrible for my family, for my mom and dad who are hurting, for their friends. And yet it doesn’t hurt that same way, and I’m left to question my relationship with those family members and why it feels wrong to not feel worse for family members who were so close in terms of relation. Of course, it could simply be attributed to that “tier system” I mentioned. My relationship with these two was just on a different level than with my other family member. One hand it feels wrong to just move on. On the other hand, I don’t want to be ingenuine in my feelings. It would be unfair and disrespectful to my parents who care, and other people who are affected strongly by their passing.

But regardless, I think that sense of “love” that may not always be outwardly expressed from my parents towards those family members definitely showed itself this week. And I don’t know, I’m not saying that’s the only time that should be the case. I’m also not saying to tell everyone you love them constantly. What I’m saying is that every connection seems to fall to its own equilibrium. Some loves need constant attention. Like a temperamental classic car you love to drive, or maybe an overly needy SO, maybe that’s the love you can give for that. Some things probably don’t need that kind of regular validation, like your lovely succulent on the window sill that needs little water, or that imaginary friend that you swear is still just hiding in the attic and hasn’t just left you or something.

I don’t think there will ever be a definitive answer to what love is, because inherently it means different things to different people. Maybe it means big, romantic gestures and maybe it means sitting silently across a dinner table eating a meal together. But there’s a beauty to something that’s that powerful and indescribable. It’s probably what people refer to when they talk about “God”. I won’t go deeper with the theology stuff other than to say that maybe God and love are just the friends we made along the way.

I also could be like 500% off base here so I invite any of the four of you to tell me I’m flat out wrong, bc it wouldn’t be the first time.

tl;dr (for real) - still, wtf is love lmk

0 notes

fearducts-blog · 7 years

Text

AN OPEN LETTER FROM EVERYONE I’VE EVER MET TO VULGAR / MORTEM.

I bet y’all thought my drama days were over, but surprise surprise, I have come “rinse crying” back to this fandom because, I understand, Vulgar. You found paradise in America, you had a good trade, you made a good living. The police protected you and there were courts of law. You didn’t need a friend like me. But, now you come to me, and you say: “kindly kiss my ass” But you don’t ask with respect. You don’t offer friendship. You don’t even think to call me Godfather. Instead, you come into my house on the day my daughter is to be married, and you make my friend cry in public because you follow bait her, publicly post about how much of a terrible person she and everyone else in this fandom is and then once again pinpoint the negative reputation you have built up for yourself on everyone but you.

I don’t know what her URLs are these days because frankly, in spite of what she will tell you, up until two days ago, I could not have given less of a shit if I tried, but going by the screenshots I’ve seen lately this post is going to concern: woshi-tuzi / twinblcdes / gelosiia / buside / baolii / puntirotti any other blogs run by Vulgar / Mortem. Not gonna lie, this is a long post, there’s a lot to go over here, and a lot of it’s going to seem like old, irrelevant, petty high school drama, because that’s exactly what it fucking is, but since Vulgar is still using drama from a year ago as her sword and shield to treat others badly, it’s long overdue that we did some good old fashioned air clearing.

I guess we’ll start with breaking down what tipped everything over the edge, this charming message that was sent to Elle; X. ( in reference to this hot vague, but we’ll get back to that later. )

“ WHAT MOMO AND IVY DID TO ME ”

We stopped talking to her, and blocked her after an argument that transpired in private — that’s it, that’s all we did. You can skip this section if you want to skip year old high school level drama, but if not...

It all happened because she guilt tripped me for taking over 10 minutes to reply... as it happens, I wasn’t replying to her because it was 3am where I was and I was fucking trying to sleep, not that the time difference matters because it was 10 minutes and not to be crude, but I could have been doing anything, I could have been taking a shit and that was apparently grounds for a guilt trip. And while I’ll admit, I could have handled it better, I’m really not here to be guilt tripped on account of not replying to someone because I’m asleep whenever they message me, because in spite of proclaiming me their “best friend”, after a month of me living in a UTC+8 timezone, they still haven’t clocked onto the fact that I’m working to a different schedule to them. So this exchange happened : X. ( call me a herpetologist bc I know you’re a snake, Vulgar, so before you say anything about the time stamps, these are your logs, not mine. ).

Anyway, you might think this has nothing to do with Ivy, and you’d be absolutely right, it doesn’t. But Vular went to her anyway and deliberately misrepresented the situation, now fortunately, not only am I a herpetologist, but I'm too, am a fucking snake, so knowing Vulgar was going to pull the same shit she did in the past where she came to me to bitch about close friends of mine following minor disputes, where whenever she had an argument with someone over skype she’d send me an MS Word version of the logs????? Before going back to bed, I straight up sent Ivy the chat logs in the immediate aftermath, I didn’t bitch about Vulgar, I just showed Ivy what happened, said I was a bit pissed off and that I wanted her to know what happened in case she was put in the middle.

Guess where she was put the very next day and who tried to put her there!! X, X, X, X. Ivy told Vulgar how things looked from an outsiders perspective and that she should apologize, she even told Vulgar how to go about doing it. And we’ve all done it, we’ve all had skype drama we’ve copy / pasted to a friend, but the thing is, Vulgar was deliberately twisting things here because by her own admission, she did not like that Ivy and I spoke to each other more than we did to her. What she likes to justify this with was “I just wanted a friend to lean on”, no you didn’t. Also, “the one time I needed it, she was so callous to me”, bullshit, you came to me every single day with a problem and I always helped you through it, I held your hand through the polycoria drama, like I cringe at the thought of this post but: X, you can’t say I was callous to you the one time you needed it, not when you posted this, not when every day in the run up to this, you came to me with a new issue about someones’ OC “cockblocking one of your ships” or someone not wanting to be mains with you.

Anyway!! Vulgar told Ivy she was going to apologize, and to the surprise of probably no one, did not. Sadly, I no longer have screenshots because I’ve since changed computers and honestly, I did not anticipate having to write this, I thought we had all agreed privately to just hate each other and move tf on, but... back to the point, in spite of her being walked through all this I still had to ask Vulgar to address how unfair she was. She might have counted finally doing so as an apology, I did not. Again, it had nothing to do with Ivy... but guess who got dragged into it anyway — again? So, we each wound up in arguments with her:

X, X, X

Vulgar apologized to me twice after this, I accepted neither apology, the first because I was hungover and I honestly and thankfully went to sleep forgot to reply. The second because, at that point it was so far in the past and her name had been kept out of both mine and Ivy’s mouths for so long, that I didn’t think it even begged addressing, I wanted to just avoid her tbh: X, X. “Look shady?” Yes. Because you sent this to me whilst still misrepresenting the entire situation to anyone who would listen, you were not sorry at all.

Ivy never got an apology in spite of being dragged into this petty bullshit against her will btw. And I think it’s pretty rich of Vulgar to claim we freely talked shit about her meanwhile sending out spicy skype messages like this about Ivy; X. Also post this vague; X, which just so happens to coincide with when Ivy refused to leave the fandom even after being stalked, harassed and having her art stolen; X

EDIT: Btw, that was really classy of you introducing me to Ivy and then privately messaging me to tell me “she’s nice but I’ll never forget she vagued about you”, then linking me to her supposed vague, like I want you guys to be friends but keep in mind not to get too close to her. Nice try Vulgar, what she posted were fucking Melanie Martinez lyrics, you played yourself.

EDIT 2: Because wow, the shit just keeps coming out about you, doesn’t it?! I realize the irony of saying this in this post of all things, but it was really nice of you to go around telling people who were new to the fandom that I was the source of all the discomfort and drama, that I was such a horrible person who was only out to bully people and chase them away for no good reason while we were still, as you put it “best friends”, while at that stage the only drama I had been involved in was when you came to me and said you were scared and uncomfortable because of someone, you’re such a good friend Vulgar (: I really appreciate that thing you did where you tried to isolate me from everyone else in the fandom, to what fucking end?!

“ WHAT HILAL DID TO ME ”

Imagine being 28 and so asshurt by what a teenager says about you on the internet ( ie. that you shipped underage incest at the age of 27, which you... you did, you literally did: X, X, X, X ) that you... lie to another teenager and get them to write a callout post in your stead so that you can personally avoid the backlash while still damaging the reputation of said person. If it sounds familiar, it’s because it’s exactly what Vulgar did: X , X , X , X, X.

Here’s an album of the exchange Hilal had with Mysteriia following that “call out”, note how they don’t deny who and what prompted them to make it, only dance around the topic: X.

Was Hilal in the wrong to name drop Vulgar in the first place? Yes, it shouldn’t have been brought into the public eye. However, he didn’t do it without reason and he told her that: X. He has since left her alone entirely.

So then there’s... the paedophilia drama, which we won’t go into too much detail about, but Vulgar, you participated in, you agreed with Hilal of your own volition, and then because it was no longer convenient for you to, you lied to Skitty about it to paint me and Hilal ( and for some reason Ivy who wasn’t even involved, nor even in the rp community at the time, as far as I’m aware? ) in a negative light to them: X, X. Anyway, Hilal’s posts pertaining to this drama can be found here: X, X. It was pretty much all dash drama and it happened back in 2015, so a lot of it’s hard to dig up again, I know both Hilal and I spoke out of anger and there are a lot of things I’d do differently, so maybe I did inflame things, and if I did, I apologize. But Vulgar, I think that’s a pretty cheap thing of you to say considering I confided in you about being a CSA victim.

Also by the by, Hilal and Elle don’t even know each other, so Vulgar, you can drop the notion that we all meet up buck ass naked under every blood moon, rattling skulls and talking shit about you or whatever it is you claim is going on: X. Elle and Hilal have nothing to do with each other, funny how different people have different reasons to dislike you, almost as if you’ve done many things to hurt many people in this fandom...

Oh yeah, and:

[03:04:32] tumblr use pourir: can you say that i dropped all my fucking blogs bc of vulgar [03:04:52] tumblr use pourir: and that i had anxiety literally eating away at me for weeks because i felt i was off base

“ WHAT THEY ALL DID TO ME ”

Yeah, it sure is awful when people don’t buy into your pass agress posts and the fact that you blame all your problems on other people without taking a step back to look at how you’re treating people, isn’t it: X, X.

It’s really, truly terrible they ask you to tag something and you lose your fucking shit with them: X, X ( relevant links: 1, 2.). And again, it’s another situation where things could have been handled better from all sides, but Bellus apologized for what happened, you did not.

Heartbreaking, when you vague about them during their first week in the fandom because someone who isn’t you makes them a theme, and you passive aggressively throw ms paint quality graphics at them: X.

Completely and utterly devastating when another roleplayer blocks you and you then proceed to make them uncomfortable by repeatedly messaging them, following them on all your subsequent blogs, in spite of people literally telling you not to, and then when you’re ignored / blocked again, starting rumours that they have a crush on you and are blocking you to save their relationship until the point they get so uncomfortable they leave the fandom.

When you guilt trip someone on account of... not putting you in their follow forever??? Because they forgot??? They literally forgot??? Not like that happens with follow forevers is it??? X, X, X. Also when said person makes it publicly known that they’re feeling extremely low and would like to be left alone and you continue to pressure them into speaking to you: X, X.

Or when you do some good old fashioned general guilt tripping: X, X, X, X, X, X.

EDIT: let’s not forget, you’re notorious for pressuring people into ships, for getting asshurt and bitching about them when they don’t want to go exclusive with you or add you as a main.

And you often fall back on telling people it’s because you have anxiety, that you can’t help but go off at people because of it. You know what, I have bpad and guess who and who alone is 100% accountable for my actions? That’s right, it’s me!! Just because you have anxiety does not mean it is a free pass to treat people badly, you are accountable for your own behaviour, you ought to apologize and do it sincerely, not because someone asks you to, not because you want to save your own skin.

“ REPEATEDLY. ”

At first I was just gonna say no to this and leave it at that. But I’m guessing this is in reference to people from the tg fandom following Vulgar on other blogs in other fandoms, so...

You can’t really argue that Hilal followed you to your bsd blog when you followed him first; X.

You can’t argue that Ivy followed you to the Naruto fandom either when you followed her; X.

And lastly, you can’t say Elle followed you to the fma fandom when again: X, you followed her first and then immediately posted this hot vague about her and everyone else in the tg fandom. And even at that, you followed her blog from your tg ones before; X. Which doesn’t exactly do anything to dispel the idea that you’re follow baiting, does it?

If this is in reference to how Ivy and I “freely talked shit about you”, we didn’t. A lot of people will vouch for the fact that they didn’t hear about anything that happened until your behaviour towards Elle catalyzed this post.

“ HAD YOU BEEN UPFRONT WITH YOUR ALIAS ”

First and foremost, fam, change your container dimensions. Secondly, “you failed to read my rules”, okay cool, but again, you followed Elle first, she broke none of your rules by following you back, unaware of who you were, and if you wanted your rules read so desperately, it might’ve been a good shout to read idk... literally the first line of hers: X, like if rules are so important to you, you can’t claim ignorance here.

And for the record, Elle’s alias has never been hidden or changed, it’s in plain sight on all her other blogs, so as to how you pulled this argument out of your ass, idk: X, X, X, X. You knew exactly who you were following, she didn’t trick you. She made a simple mistake because, in fact, if anyone is deliberately hiding their alias, it’s you, isn’t it? Because you know: X, X, X, X.

These are the rules you claim she didn’t read / broke: X, X. Tell me how she broke them, I’ll tell you how you’re lying.

“ YOU WON’T DRIVE ME OUT OF ANOTHER FANDOM ”

Nobody was trying to do that. Nobody tried to drive you out of this fandom, we all left you alone. I don’t know how you leaped to this conclusion that this is what anyone was trying to do, based on the fact that somebody followed you by accident because you changed your alias to avoid the negative reputation which you created for yourself in this fandom.

But anyway, I said this to you when we had our dispute and I’ll say it again, you fly off the handle at the bat of an eyelash, without any consideration for anyone’s feelings but your own and you really, really hurt people because of it. If you want a clean slate, if you want to leave all of this behind you, then you owe a lot of people an apology. You’re not a blameless victim, you’re a sentient adult and it’s time to start behaving like one.

#drama //#call out //#enOU GH

92 notes · View notes

taz-writes · 6 years

Note

thanks for your answer, im always interested in mbti of other people's ocs! although ive been wondering, did you check the functions for the types, or only the descriptions? because my ocs (and me) not ever fitting into mbti boxes was also my problem until i discovered functions which kinda give a brand new light to the whole thing; for example, ENFJ and ENFP are actually two very different types (the whole function set changes completely depending on the last letter)(1/2)

so if you are ever interested and/or bored you can check it out!! also, Aelia and Sayara are love interests?? i didn’t know, i love it!! and do tell about the Hogwarts houses if you feel like it, you made me curious!!(2/2)

(referencing this post)

I’ve been kinda lowkey about Sayara/Aelia being a future Thing, because they don’t become canon until book 4 out of 4, but it does happen eventually! I’ve thought about letting them be gay earlier, but they both need a lot of character development before a relationship would actually work. Aelia and Sayara getting together in book 4 is a cute romance with potential to last! Aelia and Sayara getting together in book 1 is a messy breakup waiting to happen. So they can wait. And now for something entirely different...

I did read the descriptions! I actually took the tests in character (I had nothing else to do yesterday oops), and then picked through the results and descriptions of how each letter is assigned to judge how accurate they were. A lot of my characters were assigned with a 51%/49% split or something nearly that close. I think Aelia’s quiz result was, like, 55/45 towards F, but the resulting description just didn’t feel accurate to the way I write her. The other one was a little closer but still off.

Aelia’s a weird case because I’m still feeling out how her characterization works. She’s a pretty hypocritical judgy person, but at the same time she’s flexible and fairly chill. I think I confused her types on this because I’ve been referencing multiple websites and they all disagree on what the J and P actually mean in a personality. P is probably closer, but ENFP doesn’t fit quite right on Aelia. She doesn’t want to be sorted.

There are also a lot of characters in Feilan who appear extroverted because they’re princesses who are trained from birth to be comfortable around other people, but that’s not where their actual instincts lie. They’ve just learned the skills necessary to fake it. Violet’s the best example of that! She’s very very good at leading social dynamics and talking to people, she values those skills and puts effort into them, but if left to her own devices she will lurk in the corner avoiding everyone. She hates being around other people, especially people who want something from her, which is most of them. But because she values duty and responsibility, she makes herself a social entity anyway, because that’s literally her job. Hence why she came out with an E when I took the test for her. Vi also tends towards being an objective thinker, but she balances that really well with her emotions, and when she does find something to care about she makes it a huge priority. I don’t know which side of the T/F she should fall on. When I took the test in character she came up with T, but I’m not convinced that’s wholly accurate.

Plus, character development makes things complicated, and there are a few traits that I just don’t know how to quantify if that makes sense? If I pin my characters’ behaviors down too tightly then it’s hard to see how they grow, and I’ll inevitably sound like a hypocrite because they’re dynamic individuals who don’t always act the same way. MBTI results are like a lot of other personality sorting systems, the overarching categories they produce can be useful but there has to be bleedover in the middle. I don’t buy that all of humanity can be classified into just 16 categories.

You also might find it amusing that every single individual whom I tested in-character came up with -T as their suffix on 16personalities. All of them. That might have some sway on the situation, I don’t really know, the website isn’t too clear about how that works!

I’m putting the Hogwarts house tirade under a cut because I wouldn’t know concise writing if it kicked me out of workshop class.

The reason I say I can write essays about Hogwarts houses is because there are only four of them, so it should be easy to find one big category for each character to fit in, right? Wrong. They’re so... weird.

I’ve always looked at Sorting as a measurement for equal parts traits and values--it’s not just about what you are, but also what you want to be, and what you consider important. Hence why Neville is a Gryffindor, and Crabbe and Goyle are in Slytherin. It also explains why entire families often end up in the same House, despite having varied personalities, because parents will (at least try to) raise their kids with the same core values and beliefs.

Gryffindor beliefs are courage, chivalry, and nerve. Slytherins like ambition, cunning, and... racism? I guess?? I generally choose to ignore that part because it’s stupid and pointless but whatever. Ravenclaw values wisdom, wit, and desire to learn. Hufflepuff values loyalty and hard work, but will also accept anyone who doesn’t fit the above three because inclusion is a big theme for them. I wanted to clarify how I understand the categories because people really like to argue about Hufflepuff, for whatever reason.

So Sayara’s a Slytherin. This is probably the easiest one to choose. She’s ambitious, she’s clever, she isn’t very sneaky but she thinks she is and she wants to be. She feels that power exists to be used, and she wants to be the one using it. Although she demonstrates other houses’ traits too, namely Ravenclaw desire to learn and Gryffindor selflessness, the Slytherin traits are strongest by far. Aelia’s a Gryffindor because she’s a reckless dumbass, no further elucidation necessary.

But people (looking at you, old rp friends) love to argue with me about the Ravenhart twins. Apparently it’s “obvious” that Violet is a Slytherin, and I am a fool for not recognizing this in my own original character. I think that’s stupid. Violet is clearly and obviously a true Hufflepuff, and here is why:

Violet is cunning, yes. And she’s mean. I get that being mean is a Slytherin trait to a lot of people. But Vi’s defining characteristic, in my eyes, is her devotion bordering on obsession to her family. Everything she does, throughout this entire series, is either in defense of or in revenge for her family. She spirals downward in book 1 because of her drive to get revenge for her mother and keep her sisters safe from anything threatening to hurt them. Sayara only gains her vague loyalty in book 2 by befriending and defending Aelia, and her trust by convincing Violet that they share that sense of responsibility.

Violet Ravenhart is a natural follower. She takes on a leadership role because she has the skills for it and she feels she has to, but deep down, written in her instincts, she’s a team player and can’t reach full potential when she’s in charge. Her true powers and skills shine in tandem with other people! This never shows in book 1 because she deliberately isolates herself and won’t let other people tell her what to do, but later in the series, she teams up with other characters and it brings her to new heights. She and Sayara are designed to work well together when they can ignore their own egos.

And Vi is loyal as FUCK. It takes a lot of effort to earn her allegiance, because she doesn’t listen to emotion when meeting new people, and she’s highly analytical and distrustful of anyone she doesn’t know. She automatically assumes everyone’s out to get her. But once you prove to her that you’re a friend, she will follow you to the ends of the earth, she will die for you if it proves necessary, she’s all or nothing. She can’t even convince herself to try breaking out of prison, but if someone she loves needs her help? she will TEAR THIS BUILDING DOWN. Like, I’d read Violet as a Gryffindor before I could see her in Slytherin, but people automatically assume she belongs to the Mean House because she’s kind of a jerk to people she doesn’t trust. She’s such a deeply and sincerely caring person! She just has depression and PTSD and doesn’t know how to express it in any kind of healthy way.

Lavender’s also a tricky one. I feel like she’s a Hatstall, between Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, and even I don’t know 100% where she falls. She has all the Ravenclaw traits. She’s very smart, and in private she’s quite snarky, she has a love of knowledge, but that love of knowledge is always for other people’s sake. She’s dedicated to becoming a healer in canon because she has the aptitude and she wants to help people. I’m inclined to slant Hufflepuff because her motivations are like Violet’s, but Ravenclaw would be better for her as a person. She’d grow more there because being in a different House means she can’t rely on Violet to supplement her personality. But the reason she’s ~controversial~ is because a lot of my friends who’ve guessed her House haven’t even thought of Ravenclaw as a possibility.

Dusk is a Ravenclaw, which shouldn’t take much explaining given her personality. She’s wicked smart and always wants to know more and more and more. She borderlines Slytherin with her ambitions and cleverness, but she lands on the Ravenclaw side for me because she’s just so freaking smart. If given the choice, she’d rather be a research professor than a politician. She’s a politician in canon because the former isn’t an option.

Kyrina’s a Gryffindor because she’s loud and annoying and totally fearless, and she thinks the idea of chivalry is cool even though she genuinely doesn’t know what it means.

But yeah, that’s the Hogwarts Essay(tm). It gets complicated because there are so few options that everyone overlaps, and weighing the values vs traits vs which are more important is more effort than it should be.

#taz talks #feilan #hghghgngng sorting hgng #obsessedwithwriting

0 notes