#(okay this isn't really salt but that's where I've been putting anything I post that goes against brainy/nia so I figure I might as well)

[im-not-a-l0ser]

Hi! Grace asker again.

I wasn’t intending to call you a misogynist by any means, I had simply seen a lot of differing opinions of Grace based on her insanity and just wanted to know if it was a female thing or if she was genuinely irredeemable. I’ve been in a few fandoms before where it was mostly just a female thing, and it gets very exhausting very quickly. But, if your dislike of Grace is because of her insane, cult-building, murderous tendencies, I get it. A lot of people just don’t like to see that in their fandoms.

However, does that same logic apply to how you view Max? He was also—in my eyes—an irredeemable monster, and it seems like the general consensus in NPMD is that life in Hatchetfield was undeniably better without him there. And he also was shown to be a huge bully and bigot in canon, so what makes it more acceptable to make him gay, yet not offer that same development to Grace?

Once again, maybe I’ll change my mind once I finish watching all of the content with her, but for now I’m just gauging where the line is here.

Okay, sorry. It's just a thing I've already heard and refuted before so I was a little defensive.

With Max, he isn't actually ever shown Ever doing or saying anything specifically about minorities, which is my main problem. Like, he's just generally a jerk, not specifically against queer people like Grace is.

I might be super wrong here, but I'm also pretty sure he's supposed to be bi in cannon. I don't know if that was Will Branner who said that or one of the Lang's, so take that with a pinch of salt.

He's definitely got way more of "I am being defensive because I am abused and I cannot be seen for how much I'm hurting," thing going on. If you haven't watched thw show, I totally get how you couldn't gather that. In one of my linked posts, I went a bit more in depth about it.

I've always tried to give any aggressor... well, not the benefit of the doubt, but I've always put thought into why someone might be doing something.

A great example from my own life was for a period of time, someone who'd bully me for years would call me by my chosen name, Conner. And then one day, when I posted something about how I'm not a girl, I'm nonbinary, he suddenly was really brash about it and began deadnaming me again. And instead of being offended, all I could think is "what on earth happened at home." Which is what shifted my view of it in the first place.

Just like how I don't like Grace, I can fully understand anyone who doesn't like Max, and i won't jump to his defense, I'll only jump to my own defense if I am specifically being attacked for how I perceive him, and even then it's just like "Oh, well, I see him like this."

Sorry for being agressive in the first response. It's not the first time I've heard shit like that, and it will not the last either.

I am interested in what you think after you watch the show, which I think you haven't based on how you're wording things, but I'm also at work, so I'm only skimming and I might be wrong. Either way, interested

#starkid #nerdy prudes must die #max jagerman #grace chasity

[kedreeva]

Hi! i hope it's okay to messages you about this. your posts about concrit have been so encouraging and helpful! Today i was talking to someone who isn't active in fandom much, but she read this really nice fic and asked me about commenting, and she said that obviously she wouldn't be mean but concrit is okay right? so i told her that unless the author asked for it, she shouldn't, and she didn't understand why, so i tried to explain it with that "you've brought cookies to work" thing, and she said that actually, she would want people to tell her if there was something she could do better, because otherwise she would make the same cookies again next time and people would have the same critique and not enjoy them, so no one gained anything. and it's great that she would want the concrit, but she shouldn't assume that others do. and then she said she thinks people who won't accept criticism have a weak character, and why wouldn't they want to improve, and she won't comment on the fic at all now. and i guess that's better than leaving concrit, but that was still so frustrating. i sent her some of your posts, but i don't think she got it, unfortunately. anyway, thanks for listening!

Hi! It's perfectly fine to message me about this 💜

Unfortunately sometimes people are just not at a place of development where they can put themselves into anyone else's shoes. "I would want this so everyone else must too" is a very narrow scope of vision and learning to think "I would want this, but I should not assume everyone does and should ask them to make sure" instead can take a lot of effort. Some people are willing to put in that effort, some aren't. You can try to teach them, but ultimately it's on their shoulders so don't beat yourself up about it if they don't want to hear it.

I've come to prefer the "taking a walk" analogy over the potluck one. It goes like this: If I'm out taking a pleasure stroll with some friends and a stranger comes up and starts critiquing how I walk or why, I'm not going to feel particularly charitable toward them. Someone coming up to me to explain how I need to walk in order to run in marathons isn't going to do anything but annoy me, because the point of taking a pleasure stroll with friends isn't to run a marathon. It's to hang out with my friends doing something we both like for our own reasons, as a fun social activity. It could be the best advice in the world, but it's the wrong context in which to provide it, so it doesn't matter. It's worthless because the person giving advice obviously doesn't understand anything about my motivations or goals and didn't even bother to ask if I wanted help in the first place; all they're concerned about is making sure they look smart.

The other thing that's important to both analogies is the idea of just... Basic manners involving consent. Your friend would want to be told, but if you want to reopen the dialogue, ask her which is better: someone at a potluck coming up unprompted to say "your cookies have too much salt," or someone coming up and saying "hey, you baked the cookies right? Do you mind if I give you some advice for next time?" and then respecting the answer. She also has the option of saying "hey, I made the cookies, does anyone have any pointers for next time?" which allows her to consent up front.

Anyway, I'm sure I'm not the only one who appreciates you attempting to educate your friend on common fandom manners. I hope she learns better in a gentle way.

#commenting #asks

[aquaburst3]

So...after a VERY long week, I want to spill my salt somehow by ranking the TWST Books. Some things first...

I'll be using the MAL scale, so 1 means outright garbage, 5 means it's okay and 10 means awesome. I'm not gonna include Diasomnia because of spoilers. (I will say rn that it gets a 4/10).

I'm not considering issues with the game as a whole like Yuu being an inactive protagonist, just at the arcs themselves.

Keep in mind, this is all my personal opinion. If you disagree with any of my takes, great. I don't care. You're entitled to your opinion, and I'm entitled to mine.

Though, I might save that for another post. Let's get to it!

The Prologue: 5/10 Reason: There are some good bits here like the ominous opening with us waking up in the coffin, Yuu being proactive with the mine bit, and a good introduction to the main friend group. There are downsides as well. Parts of it could've been streamlined better. For example, I don't think including both the statue being burnt and the candelier falling is necessary. One of those should've been scrapped to make the pacing snappier. Hell, that's exactly what happens in the manga. Yuu should've had much more of a negative reaction to being isekaied. While I know they think it's a dream, but they're like, "I've been transported to another world where everyone I know and love don't exist? Cool." And to add insult to injury, they have a good sleep after the first night. Like, what? What kind of person would have that reaction? It's an okay start, but it could've been a lot better.

Heartslabyul: 6/10 Reason: The writing in this arc is pretty good. The stakes are reasonably high, you get introduced to great characters, Riddle is a great antagonist for this arc, Ace gets his moment in the sun and it does a good job at mixing in the movie/book while doing its own thing.

There are still some issues. Yuu isn't really proactive, and it's more Ace who drives the plot here. The pacing seems really off, since I don't think the whole "baking the tart" thing was necessary for reasons I'll mention in a bit. There are also plot holes like if Ace's older brother attended Night Raven and told him about sleeping spots, why the fuck is he so shocked about everything, including basic information like the dorm names? Shouldn't he know this shit by now? And why didn't he just straight up challenge Riddle to the position of dorm leader without putting up with the tart BS? It seems more in character for him.

Over all, an overall decent arc, but nothing to write home about.

Savanaclaw: 2.5/10 Reason: And then, things immediately tank. xD If you ask someone in the western TWST fandom what their least favourite arc is, they'll most likely name this one. There's a reason for that. It's total shit.

The Lion King elements feel shoehorned.

The mystery is extremely obvious. Despite Ruggie using his powers right in front of Yuu, no one expects a damn a thing.

Instead of being being cunning foes, Leona and Ruggie are turned to idiots, who telegraph their plans and boast about how evil they are like telenovela villains. This pisses me off, since in the rest of the game while Leona is very lazy, he's also cunning, smart and charismatic. He's like a chessmaster who knows what moves to make. I would've loved to see that Leona in this arc.

Right before Leona overblots, he uses his powers on Ruggie out of anger and almost turns him to dust. Despite this, they go back to normal like nothing happened. This pisses me off so much. First off all, why the hell did Leona do this to Ruggie in the first place? He did nothing wrong. If anything he should do this to Jack, who foiled his plans. Second, why the fuck isn't there any fallout after that? Ruggie was almost murdered! You would think that he would be pissed off at him for what he did, and Leona would have to make it up to him. I know if that were to happen to me I would be pissed off at the very least.

Leona doesn't have a lot of involvement with the story, despite being the main antagonist for that chapter.

Epel is on the magishift team, but his thoughts on this situation and the whole deal with Leona is never addressed.

Why the fuck didn't Ruggie overblot? The game gives the impression to me. He's the one who constantly uses his powers and has everything to lose, not Leona. Hell, making it so Ruggie overblot instead would be killing two birds with one stone, since it would fix that plot hole while also fixing the issue of Leona having no consequences for his actions and not feeling any regret.

Leona's motivation is hardly explored in this arc.

Like always, Yuu doesn't do a damn thing despite them being the protagonist.

Why is Leona's first plan the stampede? Wouldn't Malleus be able to teleport away?

Over all, a shit arc and wasted potential.

Octanivelle: 8/10 Reason: This is by far the most competently written out of all the TWST arcs. Azul is a cunning foe, Yuu is an actual proactive protagonist for once, and the plot is pretty solid. The only nitpicks I have with it is that the Savanaclaw characters should've been more involved in the plot, Azul being able to memorize all that info seemed like bullshit and there is a huge continuity error with the photo that makes Azul come off like a dumbass. (The game takes place in 2020, meaning that smartphones were popular at the time Azul's fat photo was taken. The fact that the photo could be floating around online never ONCE considered. I honestly chalk this up with Yana being an out of touch Gen Xer.) Other than that, solid writing and a great arc.

Scarabia: 7/10 Reason: This one is pretty solid too. Yuu is a proactive protagonist for once, most likely because they only could rely on Grim for half of it. xD The Octanivelle Trio are great. It does a great job at mixing in the Aladdin movies while doing its own thing. There are some issues holding it back like Kalim forgiving Jamil way too damn easily, Jamil being the colpurit being a bit to obvious (but it's more forgivable here since the investigation isn't the point of the arc like with Savanaclaw), the Octanivelle Trio stealing Jamil's thunder too much at times and the idea of them digging out of Scarabia makes no sense. (Seriously, even if that was possible, their room is on top of a tower, wouldn't they just fall and plumpt to their deaths?) Over all, pretty good arc.

Pomefiore: 6/10 Reason: Things go downhill from here. The first half before the training starts is pretty solid. But afterwards issues begin to arise...

The pacing feels extremely off. Sometimes it feels padded out while others it feels extremely rushed, especially after the first day until the day of the festival. I wish that certain parts were scrapped so the story could focus on more important things.

It didn't explore the aftermath of Jamil and Kalim's relationship nearly enough.

Epel does a complete 180 on his views on gender norms in one single afternoon. Sorry, but that's not how that works in real life. People are stubborn, and some never budge. If someone does change their mind about something, it would take months if not longer. He's been living with those stereotypes all his life, so he's even less likely to budge quickly. I think it'd make more sense for him to go "Oh, I see what you're saying, but…" then immediately accept it.

Others have mentioned this before, this arc has a problem of setting up certain characters to get their moment in the sun, but then give it to someone else. The biggest example is the arc setting up that Epel will have a climatic moment where he confronts Vil, but it's Deuce who does instead, despite the little set up. If she wanted Deuce to have the climatic moment, then there should've been more foreshadowing for it.

Vil and Neige's backstory seems like something Yana pulled straight out of her ass, because it makes zero sense. How the fuck is Neige able to live with a group of minors who have the mental capacity of kindergartners without being taken by CPS? Why the fuck didn't Vil know that Neige was poor already? He works with him constantly! (Honestly, I'm 99% sure she did pull it out of her ass. There was a huge incident before Ignihyde debuted in the JP fandom where the JP fans sent her and Rook VA death threats for the ending of Pomefiore. It seems like something she came up with on the spot to plaicate that complaint and make Neige look better, but it failed anyway.)

Vil's backstory made it come off as he had almost no problems.

Why aren't Vil and Neige stepbrothers? It would make their connection much simpler and align Vil up more with the Evil Queen.

Neige and Vil had no direct interaction before the climax.

NRC losing the competition is bullshit. NRC was the better performers while Neige's routine sucked.

The usual issue of Yuu not doing anything to advance the plot is also there.

Where the the fuck is Jack in all this? He and Vil are FRIENDS, so you would think that he would be concerned about Vil and want to stop him from overblotting.

The stuff before is solid, but the stuff after the training camp starts sucks. So it evens out to slightly above average.

Ignihyde: 3/10 Reason: Going against popular opinion, but...I think this one REALLY sucks and is almost on par with Savanaclaw. Because...

Everyone is a total dumbass

There's loads of worldbuilding that comes straight the fuck out of nowhere.

The ending of Jamil and Kalim's character arc infuriates me. Instead of setting Jamil's family free, they go back to the status quo and Jamil is supposed to be happy with it!? Bullshit! (Kalim should've set the Vipers free. Period. No ifs, ands or buts about it.)

Yuu and Idia hardly interact.

Yuu loses their home, and has no reaction to it.

The ending makes Vil look like a total dumbass for never considering just making an antidote to turn himself back to normal like how the Evil Queen would've done in the movie if she wasn't killed off and makes Malleus a Gary-Sue Deus ex Machina.

Leona's reading on Jamil is so inaccurate that it makes me genuinely wonder if Yana even understands her own characters.

Ortho has no personality outside of being a stereotypical child character and is more of a prop for Idia's character.

While I don't usually comment about the gaming mechanics, but the mini games in this one are frustrating as hell. I heard of people rage quiting with this arc, because they are that unfunctional.

Over all, an overrated arc and is total shit in my opinion.

Over all score so far (in my opinion): 62%, or just above average Thoughts: The game has a very strong premise and a mostly solid cast, but there are a lot of things that hold it back from being truly amazing. Certain arcs are better than others. Over all, it's just okay. For a mobile game, that's rather impressive. Twst is best as a jumping point for transformative work. The writing is decent, especially for a phone game, but if you take the premise, characters, setting and just run away with it, you could write something so much more detailed and fleshed out yourself. I think that's why I enjoy writing fics in this fandom so much. It's a fun sandbox to play in. I can use the game's elements to create something far better, fixing any writing issues in the process like the shitty worldbuilding and Yuu being passive protagonist.

#twst negative #aqua rambles #twisted wonderland

[wanderingcas]

hey so like, i hope this is okay to send? but feel free to ignore it if you don't want to answer. i hope this isn't tmi but recently my mom became a single mom and i've been trying to help out more as the oldest, and that includes meals from time to time. my mom usually doesn't have time / energy to try out new things(frozen meals is the usual) and we're definitely on a budget- i found your post from like. two years ago lmao, saying to message if anyone needed any recipes. i don't even follow you or know you but if you had any ideas for stuff i'd really appreciate it! currently we have a lot of beans but tbh take that with a grain of salt because we can totally go out and get other ingredients, its just a matter of 1. making sure it doesn't cost much and 2. her not having to go to the store super often. do you have anything in general you'd suggest? especially with the fact that i'm a beginner in mind? it's also worth mentioning my mom likes to keep a low amount of meat in the house(but it isn't off-limits, just preferred to not be in everything). i dunno it feels super silly but i don't even feel like i know where to start. thanks in advance!

absolutely it's okay to send!' i answered the best i could, but obviously there's SO much more to go into specifically, so please feel free to message me if you have specific questions

but for every meal, i think it's best to keep it simple: protein, carb, vegetable. everything else on top of that is just extra, but at the base, the meal should consist of that. now, breaking it down into those parts:

vegetables

-frozen vegetables - peas, carrots, corn. you can’t tell these even were frozen when you put them in a soup or a casserole

-potatoes are usually cheap, depending on where you are in the world especially russet potatoes, and they can be baked alongside any protein you make.

-this isn’t necessarily on a budget, but ready-to-mix salads are a great option if you’re looking for something healthy and also fast. but those can be a couple dollars a bag. if that’s not an option, a really good idea is buying spinach (it can last at least a week in the fridge if you keep it good and sealed), buy a favorite dressing, and eat that combo for an iron kick. not the most fun thing in the world, but it’s very nutritious. you can even throw a few croutons or dried fruit in there if you can. plus, spinach can be thrown into any canned pasta sauce you get for an extra vegetable - just let it simmer on the stove for a few minutes until the spinach breaks down and gets soft. it’s a pretty versatile green!

-onions are usually affordable and always elevate a dish - just buy the cheapest your grocery store has, and don’t worry if a recipe says a certain kind (like yellow onion vs. red onion). most of the time, in a pinch, it truly doesn’t matter. we’re not aiming for a michelin star here lol

-celery: you can wrap it in tin foil and it'll last a few weeks in the crisper drawer

protein

-you mentioned you have a lot of beans, which is great, because if you don’t want a lot of meat this will provide you with a lot of protein! some ideas are chili (with those frozen veggies), vegetable soup, tacos, simply just rice and beans... they're really versatile!

-chicken thighs, bone-in, is harder to eat but always cheaper. thighs in general are cheaper than chicken breasts, too. if you can swing it, ready-made rotisserie chickens at the grocery store are the easiest to work with - simply cut and serve with rice, pasta, salad... literally anything!

-somtimes you can find discount meats that are about to expire at the grocery store. your freezer is your friend in this case - buy on sale, then freeze for up to 3 months until needed

carb

-rice is THE cheapest carb and can be used with literally anything. there's a variety of rice, all have their own personality, but get whatever is cheapest - you won't notice the difference in recipes, generally

-bread is obviously yum for any dish, especially garlic bread with pasta - cut a baguette or any thick loaf in half and spread some butter and garlic powder on it before throwing it in the oven wrapped in some foil

-pasta pasta pasta!! buy any shapes or sizes. can work with hundreds of dishes

now for random recipes that you can google for the steps or improvise - they're hopefully not too crazy complicated! obviously not a complete list, but enough to hopefully inspire you. they can all be theoretically cooked in under an hour, too.

-chili, potato soup, any baked chicken dish with veggies + a carb, fried rice, pasta with marinara sauce from an jar + side salad, tacos, quesadillas, beans + rice.

-googling "cheap dinners in 30 minutes" will also get you a crazy amount of results!

in terms of grocery shopping, i'd look up the recipes in advance, then make a list. then you can substitute any veggie or protein you want depending on price.

i hope this helps!! good luck:) and feel free to message me again with any specific questions or if you want specific recipes!! i'd be happy to provide links/steps but i didn't want this ask to get too crazy long <3

#anon ask #answered ask #sorry this took so long to ask!! #i have a newborn and time is no longer linear

[fairyroses]

ok but going about the logic of comics history isn't it brainy and dreamer a thing in the comics too? like i get that some people have different preference for ships and that's ok what i don't get is why you guys are always saying that if brainy and nia get together he is gonna mess up the timeline but dating kara it is okay isn't that double standard? I mean brainy soon or later have to go back home how do you see that play out if he dating anyone?(And sorry if i sound snappy )

It’s okay anon, I don’t think you’re being snappy. And I’m sorry if I sound frustrated at all, I promise I’m not frustrated with you. I’m actually just frustrated with the show’s apparent refusal to make these really important things clear to people who aren’t familiar with the comics. 

(Though I have to be honest, I don’t actually read comics myself (yet). I just have a lot of friends who do. Most of the things I know about this stuff comes from @kara-querl​, but I’ll do the best I can to explain the basics and hopefully clear up some of the confusing stuff for you. Again, it’s not your fault that you don’t know these things - it’s the show’s fault for not explaining them.) 

Now, as for Brainy/“Dreamer” being a thing in the comics… you’re sort of right, but not in the way you’re probably thinking. 

There is one version of Brainy (from a comics run called the Threeboot) who ends up with Nura Nal, aka Dream Girl. I’d highly recommend reading this summary of their story on twitter (just prepare yourself, because it’s a looong thread, and also, uh, the story is probably not what you’d expect it to be… especially towards the end). 

However, Nura Nal is not Nia Nal. They’re two completely different characters, and both of them very much exist in the CW show’s universe. A lot of people watching SG don’t seem to know about this distinction (because the show has not outright explained it yet), so when they hear that Brainy had a relationship with “Dream Girl” in the comics, they assume (like you did) that Brainy/Nia is a comics canon couple like Kara/Brainy is. But that’s not actually true. 

Nura is also the reason why so many people are worried about Brainy/Nia messing up the timeline. But more on that later.

For future reference, this is Nura (with a bonus Brainy in the background):

She’s not really anything like Nia, in either personality, looks, or her dynamic with Brainy. They have basically the same powers (though Nura could never shoot “dream energy” out of her hands), and the writers seem to have borrowed aspects of Nura’s relationship with her sister Mysa for Nia and Maeve’s storyline, but that’s pretty much where their similarities end. 

(The rest of this is gonna go under a cut, because it’s a LOT of information. I know you didn’t ask for a meta, anon, but that’s just kinda what happened, sorry. Hopefully it’s not too overwhelming.)

Nura is a descendant of Nia, the character that we have on the show. She lives in the 31st century and is a member of the Legion of Superheroes, just like Brainy. The fact that Nia is Nura’s great-great-etc-grandmother has been confirmed in multiple interviews. Here’s a quote from Queller (one of the show’s EPs) from SDCC, before the season even started airing:

Hints about Nura were dropped in the show as early as 4.02 (which was probably close to being filmed around the time of SDCC). In that episode, Brainy asked Nia if he already knew her because she “looked familiar”, and then there was that look of recognition on his face when she told him her name…

Then in 4.08, when Alex asked Brainy if he knew about Nia Nal in the 31st century, his only reaction is this:

Because it’s not Nia that he knows, it’s Nura. But he didn’t want to reveal too much about the future by saying that. 

However, Brainy isn’t perfect, and eventually he slipped up. He accidentally called Nia “Nura” later on in the episode, showing how closely he associates them in his mind.

This is the moment in which Nura’s existence was officially made canon on the show. 

There’s also the moment towards the end of 4.08 where Brainy told Nia that she “contains greatness,” but he couldn’t tell her how he knew that. This isn’t directly a reference to Nura, but it stands to reason that Nura is the “how” answer to how he knows this about Nia/her family.

Nura is also presumably the person that Nia and Brainy were arguing over in 4.13, whom he refused to talk about. (Tbh, I think the fact that the show apparently skipped over Nia first learning about her descendant is a grave oversight, because for non-comics fans it probably appeared to come out of nowhere.) 

So, just to be completely clear: Nia has never been Brainy’s love interest in the comics (in fact, she doesn’t even exist in the comics at all - she’s an original character created for the show), and Nura, Brainy’s actual love interest (again, specifically only from the Threeboot comics run) definitely 100% exists in the CW show’s universe. We know this because there have been multiple references to her on the show throughout the entire season. 

Based on the fact that Brainy is so familiar with how Nia’s powers work and how to train her, it stands to reason that he and Nura are rather… close. We just don’t know how close yet, because Brainy refuses to say anything about her to either Nia or us, the audience. At the very least, they’re teammates and friends. At most… well, they were engaged in the Threeboot, so…

So, to get back to your original question about shipping: From what I’ve seen, the fact that Brainy and Nura had a romance in the comics is actually a big reason why a lot of comics fans don’t ship Brainy/Nia. I can’t speak for everyone obviously, but I know that for quite a few people, the idea of Brainy dating Nia basically feels like him dating his girlfriend’s great-grandma (especially since Brainy’s references to Nura have made people wonder if they might actually have a romantic history on the show, too). It’s not quite on the same level as Marty McFly’s mother trying to kiss her own son in the first Back to the Future movie, but it’s still just… kinda squicky in a smiliar way, you know?

Nura’s existence is also what people are typically referring to when we talk about Brainy/Nia disrupting the timeline. If Brainy were to get with Nia, then that would essentially erase Nura from existence. We know that Nia’s timeline would get seriously messed up if she got together with Brainy, because she has a traceable lineage of descendants going at least 1,000 years into the future. If Brainy got in the middle of that, if he changed Nia’s destiny by allowing her to fall in love with him, then that whole timeline - Nia’s entire legacy, which Brainy is clearly familiar with - would be drastically altered. 

What kind of person would Brainy be if he agreed to date Nia, knowing that doing so would erase Nura (and her sister Mysa, and anyone else related to them) in the 31st century? Knowingly and willfully wiping out an entire lineage, including someone that he personally knows and cares about? Does that really sound like something Brainy would do?

This is probably the biggest reason why Brainy/Nia just doesn’t work for a lot of us, particularly comics fans who have caught all the Nura references so far this season. It’s not about personal ship preferences - it’s about character consistency, specifically Brainy’s. We don’t want him to get with Nia because doing so feels wildly selfish and out of character for him. 

(In fact, Brainy interacting as much as he already has with Nia personally stresses me out, because by pushing her to be a superhero and training her himself, he’s already altered her timeline in some unknowable way. We just have to hope he knows how far he can push it.)

We’ve already seen Brainy caution Nia about them potentially creating a paradox, and it seems like they’ve had a similar argument to this one at least once before off-screen. He must know what the dangers of doing something as serious as getting romantically involved with her would be, because he listed them all off to Alex and Kara in 4.08:

His Keanu Reeves movie quote excuse in the most recent episode (4.15) was flimsy at best, but when he says that he and Nia can never be together, his tone of voice noticeably changes to become more serious, making it obvious that he means it. 

With all of that stuff in mind now… do you see why so many of us are confused and even upset by the promise of more “will they/won’t they” for Brainy/Nia? 

Why would the showrunners make Nura’s existence canon if they’re not going to even touch on the issue of how Brainy and Nia getting together would obviously erase her? It’s almost like the Brainy/Nia thing has to conclude with them not ending up together, because otherwise, what does that say about Nura, and the future that Brainy knows? It would change a lot - Nura, who has existed in the comics since 1964, would be GONE - and given how much Brainy has been shown to care about the future and the timeline, I just can’t see him going along with that. I just can’t. (And neither can a lot of other people.)

But of course, this is Supergirl we’re talking about here, so I don’t have a ton of faith in the EPs or writers. They could very well just ignore all that stuff and shove Brainy and Nia together anyway. So, this isn’t me saying that Brainy and Nia will definitely not get together. After all, I don’t write the show. 

This is just me explaining why a lot of people don’t think that this Brainy/Nia storyline makes sense, given the show’s own references to Nura, as well as their establishment of Brainy as a character who cares deeply about the timeline. Brainy dating Nia would directly contradict both of those previous writing choices. 

And why would the writers do that? Why would they directly contradict their own setup? Fans who are familiar with Nura and have picked up on all these clues are just frustrated because we don’t understand this. 

TLDR: Brainy/Nia is not comics canon. Nia Nal is the ancestor of Nura Nal, Brainy’s actual love interest from the comics, who also exists within the show and lives in the 31st century. And Brainy/Nia getting together would erase Nura, and thus mess up the timeline. 

Okay, that was a lot. Hopefully that cleared some things up for you about both the comic history, as well as the whole Brainy/Nia timeline issue. I’m gonna address the rest of your questions more briefly bc I’m tired now lol. 

Why won’t Brainy getting with Kara mess up the timeline like it would with Nia?

The simplest answer to this one is that we don’t know what the future is supposed to hold for Kara. The Legion made a point of saying last season that their knowledge of the events of Supergirl’s future are vague and largely unknown. We don’t know anything about her having any descendants, or a specific legacy that needs to remain intact like Nia clearly has. (If they didn’t want to create this problem for Nia, then they didn’t have to establish those things for her either… but they did.) 

What about Brainy going back to the future eventually?

I kind of already talked about this whole thing here, so you can just read that post to see my take on it. The bottom line is, I don’t think that’s the biggest issue here, largely for BTS/casting reasons. Basically, I think it’s very unlikely that Brainy is going to go back to the future anytime soon. And because of that, I don’t think it’s really necessary to bring it up as an argument against either Brainy/Nia or Brainy/Kara. 

And finally, with regards to the whole “why do people keep saying that Kara/Brainy is THE comics canon ship when other ships like Brainy/Dream Girl also exist in the comics?” thing, which is kinda the whole point of your ask from what I can tell, I recommend that you check out this post and these tweets, which (briefly) outline all the different versions of Kara and Brainy that have existed in various media over the past 60 years, and how many of them have ended up with each other. (Spoiler Alert: There’s a very good reason why most comics fans are also Karadox shippers.)

So, in conclusion, can people ship Brainy/Nia if they want to? Of course. People can ship whatever they want. I ship Brainy and Winn after all, even though that’s not ever going to be canon, because I like their dynamic and shipping is supposed to be fun. If people want to create fanart or fics or whatever for Brainy/Nia, then they can totally do that. My issues aren’t with what ships people personally prefer. My issues are with what the actual show is doing in canon, especially within the context of the entire Supergirl mythos. 

Look at it this way: If the show doesn’t have Kara eventually fall for Brainy, then CW Kara will be the only version of Kara who had a version of Brainy in her story, and did not fall in love with him. 

Like, wow. Talk about going against history.

#I actually lowkey ship brainy/nura I think their banter in the earlier part of their comics story is cute and fun #the end of the story is Yikes but we don't need to talk about that #anonymous #asks #/// #my meta #salt tag #(okay this isn't really salt but that's where I've been putting anything I post that goes against brainy/nia so I figure I might as well)

[whysojiminimnida]

TW: All The Triggers. So Not A BTS Post. Scroll on by. TW: mentions of life cessation by various means a couple of which are probably intentional just don't come in here unless you wanna have your day ruined plskthx ....

I haven't said anything here because who reads blog entries anyway, and why fuck up other people's feeds but then I remembered I probably have nine followers. Sorry y'all.

Tomorrow we bury my sister. Her ashes, anyway. She died a couple of weeks ago. She was 28 years old and maybe it was a heroin overdose or maybe it was the pneumonia she'd had for awhile or maybe she wanted to get gone, any and all those things are possible and maybe probable. I am now my parents' only daughter again and let me tell you it sucks ass in a way that you can't understand unless you've been there when that phone call comes in and your almost 80 year old mother makes a noise that isn't human and everything in you does not want to grab that phone from her but you can't just let her hold onto it like that. So I took it and the boyfriend had stayed out all night and gotten home in the morning and found her dead and called 911 and then us and I talked to the paramedics and the cops and I had to tell them my parents are elderly, I'll be taking point on this, and I think I maybe reblogged a cute jikook post because that's what dissociatives do in times of crisis. Fast forward ten hours and I had driven the parents to another state, made arrangements for cremation and a (gulp) body viewing for literally the next morning and notified everyone I could think of that would care or need to know. One task melted into another and then it was time to look at her and I've been a nurse nearly as long as my sister was alive, I knew what to expect but my parents did not. Let the maladaptive daydreaming commence between tasks. I almost convinced myself the Jeon Jeongguk is straight. Almost. I picked an urn and picked up the remains of the day and my sister and drove my parents two states back home while we fielded intrusive questions about funerals and memorials which we were not gonna have so someone else threw a BYOB and published it in the paper, cool. She would have loved it. I didn't go. I left and came home with the shattered hearts of my parents as souvenirs. Then I bought a car because why the fuck not. I've always wanted a cute little Mini Cooper and it's not like I had anything else to do and I paid cash and bought insurance and drove off the lot with it so now I have a car named J-Mini (get it get it) because nothing like a knee jerk major purchase in the middle of intense grief, right? My father picked out my sister's plot because my mother couldn't go and I was... buying a car. That wasn't my best day but it was really the only day I checked out completely. I mean except the other five to seven business days I don't remember but I did stuff because my dad says I fed them and made sure they ate and took care of things. I'm good at that. Also kookmin and Memories 20 why hasn't that shipped yet and I think I also got the MOTS ON;E DVD set and finished my Funko Pop set. Goals, kids. Gotta achieve goals. And I also redid my parents upstairs guest suite and turned it into my office because the next novel is not gonna write itself. A little death opens up my dad's wallet and we are both OCD writers who are task oriented and very good at finding poor coping mechanisms for trauma. It's a nice office and can still function as a guest room (it's a huge room). I put the Keurig I bought so my mom would have okay coffee before viewing her daughter's body in my new office. Just brewed the first cup today and it tastes like death to me but what are you gonna do, it's salted caramel death at least. So I'm sitting in my new office looking out the plantation shutters that make up the view, idly watching my new car sit in its cute parking spot and planning the next 36 hours. Her flowers should get here soon. I ordered real ones, the rainbow tie dye looking roses. We're not supposed to take them to the cremation garden where her headstone will be because small plots and what the fuck ever seriously do not tell me that my mother cannot bring her baby girl flowers. She's dead, assholes. She's not coming back and she didn't say goodbye and the first

time my father had seen his little girl in almost two years she was cold and decidedly nonverbal and had a bruise on the tip of her nose nobody could explain and I later figured out was from her puppy trying to boop it to wake her up when she wasn't going to be waking up ever again. Fuck that. Flowers it is. I'm on food takeout duty and also my sister's best guy friend of forever might be driving here for the interment, we didn't tell most people when it was and he's nine hours away but he hasn't let us know if he's gonna stay here or what so I guess it's good the guest room office is clean, he has three twin beds to choose from so I'll probably only change the sheets on two of them because hospitality roulette seems fair given that the service is fucking tomorrow and we're trying to plan shit over here. That's a run-on sentence kids. I guess maybe the rest of the day is not snapping at people. I watered my mom's extensive flower garden but I do that every day. I took the small envelope of extra ashes from my dad because he broke down and I put them in a pretty butterfly notecard with a pink envelope and stashed my sister's nose or fingertips or random internal tissues neatly sealed in my jewelry box. Why we have them when the rest of her is already at the cemetery is because people ASKED FOR THEM like wtf why are we making earrings out of my dead sister but my parents said yes before they said no. And I called the funeral home and ARRANGED THIS SHIT so now I get to handle it. Guess I'll dole them out a gram at a time like cocaine. Oddly fitting I suppose, that part of her is in what amounts to a heroin baggie. Don't shoot up, kids. Just don't. And if you must shoot up make sure you have Narcan around and someone available to give it to you. And that your dealer isn't cutting with fentanyl or some shit. Also make sure you're not physically sick with pneumonia that might or might not have been COVID Delta, we don't know yet because toxicology and death certificates take time and I'm in charge of bugging the coroner and just haven't wanted to have to tell my parents that YES SHE WAS HIGH AF WE BEEN KNEW THERE WAS A FUCKING NEEDLE IN BED WITH HER JFC I mean they know but they'd rather it be COVID and who can blame them. Also to my sister if you offed yourself I get it and I'm not mad at you most of the time. I do understand why and frankly it might have been kinder to do it than to keep siphoning rent every month and your drug money and living expenses on the weekly if that's how you were gonna keep living, because your drama was constant and painful and caused a lot of shit and it wasn't fun for you or anyone else. But I love you and I'm so sorry you hurt so much that you had to handle it that way. And I'm sorry I'm so much older than you'll ever be and that I survived and you didn't. If it helps, you were always loved. I'll teach your kiddo all the good things. Honestly the most painful thing you did was the best thing when you gave him up. He's so bright and artistic like you and his parents love him and l get to see him a lot even if it's only on video. I visited him right after I told you goodbye and let him go wild on my Amazon and told him you love him too, that you might not be here but you'll always love him and look out for him wherever you are. I will too. Auntie ain't an absentee figure let's get that straight right now. He likes Adidas and art and aquariums and I have promised him a trip for all those things before Christmas. You know I deliver. I'll find him something to help him remember you. He has your eyes, like Harry Potter. I sang "Blackbird" to you but it made me cry so I had to stop. You've made me cry so much lately. I liked it better when I was just allowed to be quietly angry at you but now I can't. Last time I talked to you you were high af and rambling and Mom was convinced you were oxygen deprived and I told your man to take your ass to ER and fuck the consequences but you wouldn't go and he couldn't make your black belt ass get out of bed so you never went. I wish you'd gone and I

wish you'd made him stay home with you if you wanted to get high and I wish you hadn't hated yourself and wanted to die because there was so much good in you, so much beauty and now we don't get to see what's on the other side. You put yourself in a chrysalis and turned it into a crypt and I just wish you hadn't. I wish I could have asked you to please stay. I just wish you'd been able to please stay.

#triggers like whoa #tw #dead dove do not eat #dead sister too #like it's just been a fuck of an August up in here #maladaptive coping #but hey I named my new car after Jimin so #it's fine it's all fine everything's fine

[rpmemesbyarat]

RP meme from Scream Queens Ep 4 "Haunted House" (Note: Offensive content, use at own discretion)

A girl died in this tub.

There's no record of any of these names except for one.

Oh, my god, there's two of them!

I own Halloween. It's my jam.

Halloween is the most important day of the year. It's the one day on the Gregorian calendar where you're allowed to go around terrifying children and not be branded a psychopath.

I am a future network news anchor who's super classy and has almost no fat on her body.

A lot of my fans are, like, friendless dumpy coeds at this or that nursing school in one of this country's various national armpits.

They put down their hot pockets and bask in the warm glow of what it feels like to love me.

I went shopping with my comatose grandmother's credit card and bought presents.

Oh, my god, it says my name!

I hope the severed leg brightens up your trailer park.

You're a bright light in my life, and I wanted you to know how much you impress me with your frumpy spirit.

You are so devastatingly mediocre and adorable!

I can't wait to see you in person, but before that, I'd like to see you post this all over social media, to exploit it for my own gain.

Aah! It's a rotting jack-o'-lantern!

Aah! This box is just filled with blood!

She got me a razor apple!

I stole this cadaver head from an ophthalmology student just for you.

You're the most important person in the world.

So you didn't see anyone in a red devil costume entering or leaving the house?

Are you coming to the precinct pig roast this year?

Come on, she's obviously the killer!

Do you mean to suggest I changed out of my nightgown, strapped myself into a skintight pleather red devil costume, climbed out a second-story dormer, and shimmied to the ground with a chain saw before entering a window I had left open, tried to kill you, then leapt out the window, climbed back up the wall, changed back into my nightgown,

and raced downstairs, all in the course of about 90 seconds?

Clearly that's got you a little freaked out.

I'm not gonna hold any of this against you, and I'm gonna let you be my date for the faculty Halloween party.

Attempted murder!

A guy was almost killed tonight, okay?

Now, no, I'm not a detective, hell, I ain't even a cop, but what I am is somebody who watched every one of those Cosby mysteries, okay?

See? Dismemberment!

I am so sorry that I pushed you out of my car and drove off real scared.

I just can't believe that How To Lose A Guy In 10 days is your favorite movie, too.

In precisely two and half minutes when we go in there, you let me do all the talking.

What are you dressed as?

Oh, you have a squirrel. Don't see that much anymore.

Breakfast is almost ready, we got meat today.

What can you tell us about that night?

Now, we will keep your name out of it, of course.

'm a vault,

And to get in this vault you need a key. Now, you may ask, a key to what? It's a key to meaning. Once you've found the meaning, you don't need the words. You know what I'm saying?

Please, continue with your story.

Have any of you ever heard of "negligent homicide"?

We need to dispose of this body on our own. Now, I've got everything we need in the kitchen to make sausages out of her.

I'm gonna go downstairs, shut this party down, and then we'll get the body out of here.

Somebody has to watch after the baby.

Can you at least turn on the radio?

Just leave the details to me.

We can't just act like this never happened.

She's the devil, that one.

I looked at that baby up close. I know my peas and carrots. That baby was a girl.

Your support doesn't matter.

My campaign needs a theme?

My pumpkin's drunk.

I'm hosting a haunted house to raise money for sickle cell anemia.

Why are you holding a fund-raiser, though?

I don't think you understand the magnitude of the miscalculation you just made.

I can assure you you will not be winning an election anytime soon. And when you lose, I am gonna make it my lifelong passion to destroy your reputation.

You're a stuck-up little sociopath, and everybody in this room knows it.

It might behoove you to recall that everyone here witnessed you actually murder someone

Just sharpening knives.

Put the knives down.

I don't know what came over me.

How very adolescent of you to think of this.

It vaguely smacks of something my six-year-old sister would be excited about.

It's the most disgusting disease in the history of mankind.

You get it when you don't even understand the most basic tenets of oral hygiene.

Just give the dang thing its pot of gold already!

I ain't got no candy!

Bet you're a sexy dirt-covered girl. That's what I bet you are.

Sometimes I come out here and I just rub my hands on the gravestones.

I get you more than anyone.

I also find the thought of dead bodies extremely arousing.

I just don't understand why I have all these dark feelings.

You know, I just think our generation's had it too easy, you know? We haven't seen enough horrible stuff. There's no awesome diseases randomly killing people. There's not really any awesome wars to go off to and witness horrific things you can't unsee. We, like, pulled out of all of 'em.

Sometimes I just don't even feel like I'm living, you know?

The only time I feel anything is when I'm thinking about chopping up a body.

And here you are, saddled up with an uptight girlfriend who freaked out for no other reason than the fact that you just wanted to fantasize about having sex with her lifeless corpse.

Oh, my god, I got a total chub right now.

Not scary enough.

She'll let you in the back door.

What could be scarier for an adult than a child coming to murder them?

Isn't that all of our greatest fear? That the pain, the regrets, the mistakes of our youth will destroy us in our adulthood? That we can't escape our inner child. One we would rather forget, but who, at the end of the day has all the power.

Why are you lying to me?

Something does not make sense.

You got to give me more here, okay?

I don't understand what you're getting at.

Are you on bath salts?

Why are we even here?

This house is haunted.

There's a legend in this neighborhood about a woman who wailed about her dead children. And this was the house she lived in.

These dumb ol' kids are smoking crack.

I think it's incredible what you can find out with just a quick trip down to your local library.

This can be one of the rooms for the haunted house.

What exactly do you plan on doing at this haunted house?

I was thinking we could blindfold folks and make 'em put their hands in a bowl full of grapes we peeled, so it'll feel like eyeballs.

I think the reason you want to have a haunted house party is 'cause a haunted party is like a buffet for murderers.

Yeah, yeah, you can just go around killing anybody you want and ain't nobody even gonna even notice.

Just like you chopped the arms off that dumb-ass golf guy.

Why do you have it out for me?

So now you look at me and see everything you could've been.

I hope you have a good time at you haunted party and get to murder lots of folks.

You have this way too thought out.

Isn't this kind of nice?

My sense of personal identity is completely external.

I really don't have much to offer.

I've found that my particular style of speaking and gesticulation is extremely off-putting to most boys. And girls. And anyone.

I need to eat. My blood sugar is crashing.

I'm tired of depriving myself of joy and sustenance.

I may die at the end of a serial killer's blade, but I refuse to die hungry.

Which one of you ladies would like to be my costume for Halloween? I'm going as "dude having awesome sex with you."

I mean, what in the hell's wrong with the world where a guy can't even whistle at a chick just to tell her she looks hot?

I recently took a women's studies class. Yes, because it was a requirement, but I learned a lot anyways. Like the culture that says it's okay for a man to objectify a woman for her appearance is the same culture that pressures girls as young as ten to have eating disorders.

So you're basically saying I'm the one responsible for making you look hot?

When you treat us like meat, you're no better than him!

I'm not really sure how you got my number, but I like how you took the initiative and texted me where you wanted us to meet.

Do you think you're man enough to take me inside that house and attack my crack?

I'll sure this house has an amazingly romantic basement.

Hey, so, uh, a little awkward since we're about to bone down and everything, but, um, what's your name?

Smells like roadkill.

I've never been so scared in my whole life.

All right, if we go to the police, they're gonna see I'm still rocking a mad sidepipe, and they're gonna think I had something to do with it.

We have to warn people.

All right, everybody listen up! All of your lives are in danger!

There are dead bodies! Dead bodies. Real-life dead bodies.

Did you say dead bodies?

Those are like the most lifelike dead bodies I've ever seen.

Is that a real dead body?

There are five dead bodies in that house. Laid out in horrible and deliberate macabre poses.

You are not leaving this house tonight.

You make it harder and harder to believe that you're not the killer.

I found out something really interesting, and now I have a theory.

Everything is weird about that story.

I mean, it's too big a coincidence.

We have to figure out who that woman was.

#rp meme #rp memes #rp starters #roleplay memes #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #scream queens

[imxenelle]

Farewell Kim Jonghyun

To be honest, I don't know how to start this blog but I will try my best to make my point clear. And I hope people will take their time to read this. This might be a bit long but please.. Bare with me. Thank you.

I am someone at the age of 19 years old. Eversince I was a child, I had depression. What triggered my depression was watching my family breaking apart and losing a family member because of depression. I was at the age of 4, an age where I shouldn't understand yet what was going on. I should've focused on playing with kids or do stuff like a normal kid should do, but I did not. Instead, I was by my mothers side as I watched her cry every night. I took care of her whenever I could as I wiped away her tears and brought her tissues and a glass of water. I was also always alert when she was about to collapse. I kept her cellphone ready in order to call for help or was ready to run out to our neighbors eventhough it was in the middle of the night. To make it short, I did not acknowledge my depression until I was in elementary. I went to a psychiatrist almost 2 times a week.

Now that I am 19, I've recently realized as to why my depression comes back every now and then. It is not because of my past. I accepted years ago that my family wouldn't be the way it used to be. So I do know that this is not the main reason for my mental issue today.

It was around the first week of September 2017 when I realized, after all these years, that I was the reason behind my depression. I'm the main cause. I am pressured by my own self. I exhaust my own self without noticing it all those years.

After I realized this, the whole reason behind my anxiety and depression, I couldn't stop myself from hurting myself anymore. I was tired of myself once again. On the 23rd September, I tried to overdose myself. 7-8grams, but nothing happened to me, not even after I fell asleep. I got mad. I was annoyed. I couldn't understand why I was still breathing and alive. But I eventually moved on and well, went on with my life.

I'm doing well today.

The point about this blog is, Jonghyun and I have the same reason as to why we're suicidal and have depression. Please, I am not claiming that we have the exact reason nor do I try to claim something else. We are both different people with different feelings and emotions.

I've read an article where Jonghyun's letter was posted and I was extremely shocked hearing about him being depressed about himself. I don't know how to express myself nor do I know if I'm even saying this right. I felt like I understood where he was coming from when he said that people should not judge ones' depression, mostly if you have no clue what he or she is going through. Also when a person was questioning the reason of Jonghyuns' depression. You cannot tell a person what was triggering his mental issues when he himself knew it already.

Having depression myself, I know what a struggle it can be. So I am very thankful to the people who are there for me and never giving up on me. So I hope people out there has at least someone they can trust and depend on whenever they need someone. If you think you don't have anyone, you can always message me. I'm always ready to make friends and be there for someone who needs a shoulder to lean and cry on.

And before I end this blog, I would like to copy paste something I wrote on my IG. I wrote it into 3 parts.

1. "It's all in your mind" "Don't let it go to your head" "Think positive" "Those feelings aren't permanent" "Others have it worse than you"

Please, please stop using those words when someone opens up to you about their problems. About their loud cries in their head. Their silent tears that scream for help. Stop. Please stop promising to a person who has anxiety/depression that you're there for them when you just end up leaving them with their thoughts. With their killing thoughts that no one hears but them. Please stop offer help if you refuse to listen but just put your own words into our mouths. You may reflect upon our situation but please do not talk for us. We may have the same situation but we do not have the same feelings. Please do not compare us with others as we are all different from each other. We do know that people out there may have it worse than us but we do not need it to be rubbed under our noses. We know. Please understand that we are troubling with ourselves. We do not mean to bother others so we keep it to ourselves. But the more we keep it to ourselves, the more people get affected, isn't it? I apologize for that. But please know that I am trying my best to do better, to be okay, to be happy. Please do understand as I try to help myself to be okay because I know no one can help me except myself. But the problem is, I do not know how to help myself anymore. Please do understand that talking may be tiring for us by now as we try to explain over and over again. It's not like we refuse to talk. It's not like that. Please don't force us to talk. It's just really tiring now that we just shut down and stay quiet and just cry. Please understand that anxiety and depression isn't just a feeling of being scared and sadness. It's not. It's something we cannot explain once it hits you. Please do not tell us to think of something positive. It is not like we do not want to. We do try to think positive. But once it hits us, our mind goes blank. It shuts off. Yes, sometimes we do not think but just feel. So please stop saying it is all up in our mind. We do not feel the pain in our mind but in our heart.

2."Try harder" "Your 'trying' isn't enough" "Don't try, do it" "Trying won't hurt"

It ain't easy the way it sound like. Please do not tell us that we should do something in order to make ourselves busy. To make our mind busy. It's because it'll make sound like we aren't trying. But we do. We do know that you mean only good but at the back of our mind it'll still bother us to the point that our mind starts to think "I am trying!" God damn it, we are trying. I am trying. Putting these words into my own mind and mouth is like adding salt to a fresh wound. I take the salt from you and pour it unto my own open flesh so it'll hurt less, but it doesn't. Please do know that we are trying our best to be okay. We try our best to stay happy. Because who doesn't wants happiness in their life? We want it too. We want it to last, even if it would be for a single day. So we try our best to do all the things we love to do, even if it'll takes a risk and a step beyond the line we're scared to cross. Taking the risks in life gave us sometimes the taste of happiness but coming at the end of the day, the same feeling comes back, even if we do not want to welcome it back. It's because IT welcomes us back.

So please, do not tell us to try harder because we do not try. We DO our best.

3. "You're being too dramatic" "Attention seeker" "It'll be okay"

Please stop saying that we're being too dramatic and that we're attention seekers. It hurts. Emotions and feelings aren't something to joke about. Please understand that we rather choose to keep it to ourselves instead of telling it to others. Keep it away even from our friends and loved ones. Sometimes they do not understand us either. Please understand that it hurts the most as we cry in our own 4 walls as we try not to make a sound in order for people not to hear us. It hurts. It hurts when loved ones don't understand. But it hurts the most when they blame themselves because we feel this way. We do not want to blame anyone but ourselves. Our own mind. Please do not talk down on us as you say "it'll be okay". People like I hold unto your words in hope you are saying the truth but cry in pain as these were words were filled with no sincerity but air. We do not blame you for these words that slip from your lips but our idiotic selves for trusting and holding unto something that can't promise us anything. Please do not tell us it'll be okay when you can't see your own tomorrow. Please do not tell us it'll be okay when we've been told this now since years. We are still not okay. Please stop giving us false hope that were meant to be unintentional.

ㅡㅡㅡ

I am done. I'm sorry if this was a long blog but I would like to give my sincerest thank you if you read it till here!

Please message me if you like to talk to me! You can open up to me about anything. I'm happy to make friends! And please remember to spread love. I love you peeps so much! Always take care of yourself! ❤

Lastly, I would like to end this blog with a short message to our Jonghyun.

.

Dear Jonghyun,

How are you? Are you doing well? I do hope you're well and safe. I believe that you're in a place now where you can rest your tired soul. I would like to thank you for being my very first ultimate bias. Thank you and SHINee for bringing me in into the Kpop world. Thanks to you, I found something I can hold unto whenever I feel down and happy of course. Thank you for being my joy and inspiration and motivation. Thank you for sharing your blessings with us. Your beautiful voice with your sweet and kind heart. Thank you for being you Jonghyun. I am sorry if I'm still crying as I write this but please know that I love you so much and that I miss you. I am sorry if I tried to run away from my own sadness and reality. I tried to run and build a wall from the reality that was right in front of me. I was scared to face it. I couldn't believe it and refused to accept it. It was too painful for me to let you go just yet. But knowing that you're in a safe place now, I try to let go. I'm slowly letting go of you. But it doesn't mean I will forget you. I will never forget you Jonghyun. You will always have a place in my mind and heart. You did well.

Rest in Peace Kim Jonghyun.

#kim jonghyun #kim kibum #choi minho #lee taemin #lee onew #lee jinki #jonghyun #rip jonghyun #shinee jonghyun #kpop #depression #shawol #shinee world #key #kibum #taemin #onew #minho #jinki