#(because they were either A. built in a MUCH cooler time B. built with a 'fuck it we gotta flip houses' mindset in mind so they are Cheap)

[lokiondisneyplus]

A review of “Journey Into Mystery,” the penultimate Loki Season One episode on Disney+, coming up just as soon as I paper cut a giant cloud to death…

Journey Into Mystery was the title of the first Marvel comic to feature either Thor or Loki. It began as an anthology series featuring monsters and aliens, but Jack Kirby, Stan Lee, and Larry Lieber were so smitten with their adaptation of the characters of Norse myth that the Asgardians gradually took over the whole book, which was renamed after its hammer-wielding hero(*).

(*) The early Journey Into Mystery stories treated Thor’s alter ego, disabled Dr. Donald Blake, as the “real” character, while Thor was just someone Blake could magically transform into, while retaining his memories and personality. It wasn’t even clear whether Asgard itself was meant to exist at first, until Loki turned up on Earth in an early issue, caused trouble, and Blake/Thor somehow knew exactly how to get to Asgard to drop him off. Soon, the lines between Thor and Blake began to blur, and eventually Thor became the real guy, and Blake a fiction invented by Odin to humble his arrogant son. It’s a mark of just how instantly charismatic Loki was that the entire title quickly steered towards him and the other gods.

But once upon a time, anything was possible in Journey Into Mystery, which makes it an apt moniker for an absolutely wonderful episode of Loki where the same holds true. Our title characters are trapped in the Void, a place at the end of time where the TVA’s victims are banished to be devoured by a cloud monster named Alioth. And mostly they are surrounded by the wreckage of many dead timelines. Classic Loki insists that his group’s only goal is survival, and any kind of planning and scheming is doomed to kill the Loki who tries. But this ruined, hopeless world instead feels bursting with imagination and possibility.

There are the many Loki variants we see, with President Loki, among others, joining Classic, Kid, Boastful, and Alligator Loki. There are the metric ton of Easter Eggs just waiting to be screencapped by Marvel obsessives (I discuss a few of them down below), but which still suggest a much larger and weirder MCU even if you don’t immediately scream out “Is that… THROG?!?!?” at the appropriate moment. And all of that stuff is tons of fun, to be sure. But what makes this episode — and, increasingly, this series — feel so special is the way that it explores the untapped potential of Loki himself, in his many, many variations.

This is an episode that owes more than a small stylistic and thematic debt to Lost. It’s not just that Alioth looks and sounds so much like the Smoke Monster(*), that it makes a shared Wizard of Oz reference to “the man behind the curtain” (also the title of one of the very best Lost episodes), or even that the core group of Lokis are hiding in a bunker accessible via a hatch and a ladder that’s filled with recreational equipment (in this case, bowling alley lanes). It’s also that Loki, Sylvie, their counterparts, and Mobius have all been transported to a strange place that has disturbing echoes from their own lives, that operates according to strange new rules they have to learn while fleeing danger, and their presence there allows them to reflect on the many mistakes of their past and consider whether they want to, or can, transcend them.

(*) Yes, Alioth technically predates Smokey by a decade (see the notes below for more), but his look has been tweaked a bit here to seem more like smoke than a cloud, and the sounds he makes when he roars sound a lot like Smokey’s telltale taxi cab meter clicks. Given the other Lost hat tips in the episode, I have to believe Alioth was chosen specifically to evoke Smokey.

Classic Loki is aptly named. He wears the Sixties Jack Kirby costume, and he is a far more powerful magician than either Sylvie or our Loki have allowed themselves to be. He calls our Loki’s knives worthless compared to his sorcery, which feels like the show acknowledging that the movies depowered Loki a fair amount to make him seem cooler. But if Classic Loki can conjure up illusions bigger and more potent than his younger peers, he is a fundamentally weak and defeated man, convinced, like the others, that the only way to win the game into which he was born is not to play. “We cannot change,” he insists. “We’re broken. Every version of ourselves. Forever.” It is not only his sentiment — Kid Loki adds that any Loki who tries to improve inevitably winds up in the Void for their troubles — but it seems to have weighed on him longer and harder than most.

But Classic Loki takes inspiration from Loki and Sylvie to stand and fight rather than turn and run, magicking up a vision of their homeland to distract Alioth at a crucial moment in Sylvie’s plan, and getting eaten for his trouble. He was wrong: Lokis can change. (Though Kid Loki might once again argue that Classic Loki’s death is more evidence that the universe has no interest in any of them doing so.) And both Loki and Sylvie have been changing throughout their time together. Like most Lokis, they seem cursed to a life of loneliness. Sylvie learned as a child that a higher power believed she should not exist, and has spent a lifetime hiding out in places where any friends she might make will soon die in an apocalypse. Our Loki’s past isn’t quite so stark, but the knowledge that his birth father abandoned him, while his adoptive father never much liked him, have left permanent scars that govern a lot of his behavior. The defining element of Classic Loki’s backstory is that he spent a long time alone on a planet, and only got busted by the TVA when he attempted to reconnect with his brother and anyone else he once knew. This is a hard existence, for all of them. And while it does not forgive them their many sins(*), it helps contextualize them, and give them the knowledge to try to be better versions of themselves.

(*) Loki at one point even acknowledges that, for him, it’s probably only been a few days since he led an alien invasion of New York that left many dead, though due to TVA shenanigans, far more time may have passed.

For that matter, Mobius is not the stainless hero he once thought of himself as. While he and Sylvie are tooling around the Void in a pizza delivery car (because of course they are), he admits that he committed a lot of sins by believing that the ends justified the means, and was wrong. He doesn’t know who he is before the TVA stole and factory rebooted him, but he knows that he wants something better for himself and the universe, and takes the stolen TemPad to open up a portal to his own workplace in hopes of tearing down the TVA once and for all. Before he goes, though, he and Loki share a hug that feels a lot more poignant than it should, given that these characters have only spent parts of four episodes of TV together. It’s a testament to Hiddleston, Wilson, Waldron, and company (Tom Kauffman wrote this week’s script) that their friendship felt so alive and important in such a short amount of time.

The same can be said for Loki and Sylvie’s relationship, however we’re choosing to define it. Though they briefly cuddle together under a blanket that Loki conjures, they move no closer to romance than they were already. If anything, Mobius’ accusations of narcissism in last week’s episode seem to have made both of them pull back a bit from where they seemed to be heading back on Lamentis. But the connection between them is real, whatever exactly it is. And their ability to take down Alioth — to tap into the magic that Classic Loki always had, and to fulfill Loki’s belief that “I think we’re stronger than we realize” — by working together is inspiring and joyful. Without all this nuanced and engaging character work, Loki would still be an entertaining ride, but it’s the marriage of wild ideas with the human element that’s made it so great.

Of course, now comes the hard part. Endings have rarely been an MCU strength, give or take something like the climax of Endgame, and the finales of the two previous Disney+ shows were easily their weakest episodes. The strange, glorious, beautiful machine that Waldron and Herron have built doesn’t seem like it’s heading for another generic hero/villain slugfest, but then, neither did WandaVision before we got exactly that. This one feels different so far, though. The command of the story, the characters, and the tone are incredibly strong right now. There is a mystery to be solved about who is in the big castle beyond the Void (another Loki makes the most narrative and thematic sense to me, but we’ll see), and a lot to be resolved about what happens to the TVA and our heroes. And maybe there’s some heavy lifting that has to be done in service to the upcoming Dr. Strange or Ant-Man films.

It’s complicated, but on a show that has handled complexity well. Though even if the finale winds up keeping things simpler, that might work. As Loki notes while discussing his initial plan to take down Alioth, “Just because it’s not complicated doesn’t mean it’s bad.” Though as Kid Loki retorts, “It also doesn’t mean it’s good.”

Please be good, Loki finale. Everything up to this point deserves that.

Some other thoughts:

* Most of this week’s most interesting material happens in the Void. But the scenes back at the TVA clarify a few things. First, Ravonna is not the mastermind of all this, and she was very much suckered in by the Time-Keeper robots. But unlike Mobius or Hunter B-15, she’s so conditioned to the mission that even knowing it’s a lie hasn’t really swayed her from her mission. She has Miss Minutes (who herself is much craftier this week) looking into files about the creation of the TVA, but for the most part comes across as someone very happy with a status quo where she gets to be special and pass judgment on the rest of the multiverse.

* Alioth first appeared in 1993’s Avengers: The Terminatrix Objective, a miniseries (written by Mobius inspiration Mark Gruenwald, and with some extremely kewl Nineties art full of shoulder pads, studded collars, and the like) involving Ravonna, Kang, and the off-brand versions of Captain America, Iron Man, and Thor (aka U.S. Agent, War Machine, and Thunderstrike, the latter of whom has yet to appear in the MCU). It’s a sequel to a Nineties crossover event called Citizen Kang. And no, I still don’t buy that Kang will be the one pulling the strings here, if only because it’s really bad storytelling for the big bad of the season to have never appeared or even been mentioned prior to the finale.

* Rather than try to identify every Easter egg visible in the Void’s terrain, I’ll instead highlight three of the most interesting. Right before the Lokis arrive at the hatch, we see a helicopter with Thanos’ name on it. This is a hat tip to an infamous — and often memed — out-of-continuity story where Thanos flies this chopper while trying to steal the Cosmic Cube (aka the Tesseract) from Hellcat. (A little kid gets his hands on it instead and, of course, uses the Cube to conjure up free ice cream.) James Gunn has been agitating for years for the Thanos Copter to be in the MCU. He finally got his wish.

* The other funny one: When the camera pans down the tunnel into Kid Loki’s headquarters, we see Mjolnir buried in the ground, and right below it is a jar containing a very annoyed frog in a Thor costume. This is either Thor himself — whom Loki cursed into amphibianhood in a memorable Walt Simonson storyline — or another character named Simon Walterston (note the backwards tribute to Walt) who later assumed the tiny mantle.

* Also, in one scene you can spot Yellowjacket’s helmet littering the landscape. This might support the theory that the TVA, the Void, etc., all exist in the Quantum Realm, since that’s where the MCU version of Yellowjacket probably went when his suit shorted out and he was crushed to subatomic size. Or it might be more trolling of the fanbase from the company that had WandaVision fans convinced that Mephisto, the X-Men, and/or Reed Richards would be appearing by the season finale.

* Honestly, I would have watched an entire episode that was just Loki, Mobius, and the others arguing about whether Alligator Loki was actually a Loki, or just a gator who ended up with the crown, presumably after eating a real Loki. The suggestion that the gator might be lying — and that this actually supports, rather than undermines, the case for him being a Loki — was just delightful. And hey, if Throg exists in the MCU now, why not Alligator Loki?

* Finally, the MCU films in general are not exactly known for their visual flair, though a few directors like Taika Waititi and Ryan Coogler have been able to craft distinctive images within the franchise’s usual template. Loki, though, is so often wonderful to look at, and particularly when our heroes are stuck in strange environments like Lamentis or the Void. Director Kate Herron and the VFX team work very well together to create dynamic and weird imagery like Sylvie running from Alioth, or the chaotic Loki battle in the bowling alley. Between this show and WandaVision, it appears the Disney+ corner of the MCU has a bit more room to expand its palette. (Falcon and the Winter Soldier, much less so.)

#Loki #spoilers #episode 5 #review #Rolling Stone #Alan Sepinwall

[pixelated-pogues]

Summer Love (j.m)

Prompt: Summer Love by One direction  Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader Requested: Yes, a PHAT minute ago. Warnings: SLIGHT angst, mild cursing. -------------------------------------- Can’t believe you’re packing your bags trying so hard not to cry had the best time and now it’s the worst time but we have to say goodbye

JJ lays on your bed in silence, toying with a loose thread while you continue focusing on folding the articles of clothing that you’d haphazardly thrown on your bed moments prior. You nibble on your lip in concentration, trying to bite back the intrusive emotions pooling inside of you while packing up the belongings in the room you’ve called your own for the past three months.

His eyes trail over to you and catch the fact that your expression matches how he’s feeling to a T. He opens his mouth to speak but quickly closes it because he can’t find the right words to say. Instead he sits there in denial, trying to discount the fact that you’re leaving him soon. He thinks over the past few months and nearly laughs. It’s crazy how the boy that hates anything that has to do with love fell so undeniably in love with you in such a short span of time. He still can’t wrap his head around how quickly you nuzzled your way into his heart, breaking down all of the barriers his dysfunctional family dynamic has created over the years.

Don’t promise that you’re gonna write don’t promise that you’ll call just promise that you won’t forget we had it all

“Stop promising me that you’re going to call,” you exclaim, unable to hide the break in your voice. JJ closes his mouth in shock, unsure of how to respond to the sudden outburst. “God, just stop,” you sniffle, running your hands over your face before turning away from him to pace around the room. “You keep making all of these promises that we both know damn well we’re not going to keep. No matter how much we want to believe that this is going to work, it’s not going to JJ.” Your movements halt for a brief second before you shift to face him again, hesitantly meeting his eyes.

“Y/n,” he trails off, eyes begging you to stop. 

“No,” you smile sadly, your tear-filled eyes staring into his own. “It’s been so good. We both know that. I mean, being here with you has made me happier than I ever could have anticipated that it would have but we’re young JJ. We’re so young and we’re going to be so far away from each other. We’re going to be around other people, have other distractions, and we’re going to fade out of each other's thoughts.”  

You’re partially expecting him to fight back, to scream at you that you’re wrong, but he doesn’t. He stands across from you with his mouth clenched shut in a thin line, eyes pooling with understanding because, as much as you both hate to admit it, he knows that you’re right. 

“Okay,” he agrees finally breaking his streak of silence. You stare at him sadly, shoulders slumped in defeat as the boy approaches you calmly. His hands move to push your hair away from your face before cupping your cheeks. He takes a minute to study your features, seemingly soaking in every detail, before he sighs softly. “You’re right. It’s stupid to think that we can make this work right now, but can we at least promise each other one thing?”

Your eyebrows furrow together in confusion, but you nod in agreement nonetheless. 

“Can we promise each other that we won’t forget everything we had this summer? Like, even when the feelings fade, that we’ll never forget how good we were?” He asks softly, making you feel like putty in his hands. “Because I don’t give a damn about how young we are, or what anyone else says, we’re so good together. So, can we at least make that promise? To never forget?”

Your eyes trail over to look at his pinky, which’s now extended out towards you, waiting for you to seal the promise, and you can’t help but let a few tears fall. “Of course,” you agree, locking your pinky with his. You share melancholy smiles, sealing that promise to each other before letting go. “I love you so much JJ Maybank,” you murmur, gently pulling the boy into a tight hug. It feels like an unofficial goodbye like you’re both leaving that piece of yourselves in this room once you part. You’re convinced that it should hurt more than it does, but somehow knowing that there’s a pact made specifically to remember makes it a whole lot lighter. 

JJ’s hands capture your flushed cheeks again as his lips meet your own, clearly sealing the deal. 

‘Cause you were mine for the summer now we know it’s nearly over feels like snow in September  But I always will remember  You were my summer love You always will be my summer love

JJ is struggling to come to terms with the fact that you’re leaving; the fact that your love story is coming to an end. He tried to hide it, but it’s evident. You can see it. Hell, you’re convinced that the entire island can see it. You’ve watched his smile falter and his eyes fill with involuntary tears more times than you can count when you’ve been out with the pogues. He’ll let out shaky sighs before pulling it together, mimicking his hands that wordlessly pull you closer to him.

You’d be lying if you said that you’re not struggling with that reality too. The days are slowly ticking away and you can’t shake the overwhelming sadness that you feel because of it. The hole in your chest slowly grows deeper as the day you leave gets closer and closer, and you find yourself scrambling to grasp on to life you have built in the months you’ve been in Outer Banks.

“You okay love,” you question quietly, your lips brushing his ear as the fire in front of you crackles softly. He leans his head against yours, a gentle sigh falling from his lips before he nods.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, “Just trying to soak up the time I spend with you and the pogues. Don’t want it to change.” His lips press a gentle kiss against your shoulder making your heart melt.

“Same,” you sigh, looking over at your friends before making eye contact with Kie. She shoots you a subtle wink before shifting her attention back to John B and Sara. “I don’t want to let any of it go. I know it’s coming to an end, but I don’t want to accept it.”

“I refuse to,” he admits, causing you to giggle in agreement. “I’m never going to forget this summer.”

“Me either,” you agree, relaxing into his embrace. “This has been the best summer I’ve ever had. I definitely have you to thank for that.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Oh absolutely. This summer would’ve been such a drag without my summer love,” you tell him, nudging him with your shoulder to help make light of the situation.

Wish that we could be alone now if we could find someplace to hide make the last time just like the first time push a button and rewind

You curl up next to JJ, giggling at John B and Pope who are roughhousing on the sand in front of you.

“Don’t take that Pope, show him who’s boss,” JJ encourages from beside you. He nearly howls when Pope gains the upper hand, throwing John B on the sand. John B grunts, wiggling around in an attempt to get out from under him.

“Boys,” Sara whispers in your ear, rolling her eyes in amusement. You match her actions, laughing as Kie comes walking up to the group with a cooler clutched tightly in her hands.

“Oh I see how it is. You force me to do all the heavy lifting while you guys roll around in the sand,” she quips, dropping the cooler on the ground before grabbing a few drinks for you, Sara, and JJ. Pope and John B ignore her comment for a minute, before John B finally accepts defeat forcing the other boy to jump up in victory.

“Way to be a sore winner Pope,” John B huffs, slightly out of breath as Sara helps him out of the sand.

“Okay so, I know we’ve only got a few more Pogue hangouts with Y/n,” Kie begins, letting Pope take a sip from the bottle in her hands. “So I thought we could end the summer with a bang and have a going-away kegger with everyone. One last hoorah before JJ’s better half leaves. What do we think?”

Agreements quickly circulate around the circle, everyone’s eyes expectantly turning to you and JJ. You smile at all of them before tilting your head to look at the blond, who was already staring back at you.

“You guys know I can’t say no to a party, count us in,”JJ chimes in, gently squeezing your knee.

“Yeah, I think it’s a good way to end the summer,” you agree, smiling at all of them. You tune their cheers of joy out quickly, your mind getting slightly foggy due to the realization that JJ isn’t the only one you’re leaving behind. Part of you wants to sneak away with him, and squeeze in the most one-on-one time as humanly possible, while the other part of you wants to spend every minute with the whole group that you quickly considered family. “I mean, I started out my summer by meeting all of you at a kegger, I think it’s only appropriate that we end it in the same way.”

Don’t say the word that’s on your lips don’t look at me that way just promise you’ll remember when the sky is grey

“JJ, listen. You know I love you. You know I don’t want anything to change, but maybe waiting is just making this harder on both of us. Maybe we should just end thi-.”

“Don’t,” JJ cuts you off, immediately shutting you down before you can continue. “You’re not doing this right now. I’m not trying to be a dick, but we’re not ending this until you get on that ferry. Until then, we’re not even thinking about uttering the words goodbye yet. Understood?”

A tearful sigh falls from your lips before they press into a thin line. “Understood,” you agree, meeting his gaze with a pout. You move to cover your face with your hands, trying to eliminate the pool in your eyes before he sees, but he stops you. His hands tangle with yours, softly forcing your to look at him. To your surprise, his ocean eyes are swimming with tears as well.

“I get you for the rest of the summer dammit,” he cackles, making light of the situation as the two of you chuckle softly. He then pulls you into his comforting embrace, hugging you close to his chest while you rest in a silent understanding, being able to cherish the moment in a different way.

“Please don’t look at me like that,” you mumble under your breath, comfortable in your position against his chest.

“Like what love,” he questions, resting his chin on your head.

“With your sad puppy dog eyes, it breaks my heart. I can’t take it,” you breathe humorously but there’s a hint of seriousness in your tone as well. “It makes me feel like someone’s dying, and that’s not the case. I’ll still be around, even when the skies are grey and I’m a million miles away.”

So please don’t make this any harder we can’t take this any farther And I know there’s nothing that I wanna change

“Wait, Y/n wait,” you hear behind you, forcing you to spin towards the familiar voice as a blonde blur serves through the crowd of people boarding the ferry.

“JJ, what are you doing here? You’re supposed to be at work? Why are yo-.”

“Stay with me. God, I know I sound crazy but just stay here with me. We can talk to your parents. You could stay with your aunt until you graduate. We can figure this out, but God please don’t leave me,” he cuts you off, eyes wild as he clumsily fumbles over his words.

“JJ, you know I want to but-.”

“But what Y/n? You said it yourself, this has been the best summer you’ve ever had, and dammit it’s been the one I’ve ever had too. You hate it back home, and your parents know that. I’m sure they’d rather you be somewhere that you’re happy, right?” He pleads with you, his voice calm with a hint of desperation as he tries to convince you to agree.

“Of course they want me to be happy, but they’ll never agree to letting me stay here. I had to fight like hell just to get away for the summer,” you explain, trying to ignore the lump forming in your throat. “I want nothing more than to stay, you know that, but I can’t.” You take a moment to breathe, allowing your hand to cup his cheek delicately as your eyes plea for him to let it go. “Please, don’t make this any harder.”

“Y/n, please,” he begs, his hopeful demeanor crumbling in front of you. “I swear we could figure it out. I mean, your aunt loves me. We could convince her to talk to them. We don’t have to say goodbye.”

“Love, I’ve already tried,” you murmur, eyes locked with his sadly. “She already called them, and they declined. This can’t go any father.”

His shoulders slump in defeat, accompanied by a long sigh. “Okay,” he breathes, nodding gently. “Okay.” He pulls you against his chest, holding you against him gently. “I just didn’t want anything to change.” His lips press a chaste kiss against the crown of your head as you nuzzle into him.

“I don’t either,” you huff, tears pricking at the back of your eyes again. “I hate that I have to say goodbye, but I want you to know that I wouldn’t change anything that happened this summer. Not even that time that you nearly broke my leg during the three legged race at the fair.”

“Babe, I told you that we were going to win. It’s not my fault that you’re so slow,” You both burst into a fit of sad giggles, smiling at the memory.

“Last call for those boarding the ferry,” echoes over the loud speaker, cutting the sweet moment short.

“That’s your cue,” he tells you, pulling away so he can look at you.

“That’s my cue,” you repeat, sadly smiling at him. “I love you. Don’t forget about me, okay?”

“I could never,” he promises, pecking your forehead. “I love you. Feel free to write me and tell me all about your crazy life on the mainland.”

“Okay, JJ,” you smile. He leans down and presses a passionate kiss against your lips, seemingly putting all of his emotion from the past several months into it.

“Alright kid, you’ve got a ferry to catch,” he announces, giving you one last hug before spinning you towards the entrance of the boat. “Be safe out there.”

With that, you pull him in for one last kiss as a final goodbye and he sends you on your way. One of his old necklaces dangles from you neck as you walk away, fighting to not look back. You know if you look back before you’re on the boat, you’ll crumble and you’re not sure either of you can handle that.

Yet, as soon as your feet touch the boat, you’re spinning around to look at him again, half expecting him to have walked away already. He stands stands several feet away with his hands shoved in his pockets, eyes squinted at you due to the sun. He shoots you a playful wink, blowing you a kiss. You wave one last time as the boat begins pulling away from the dock, beginning the trek back to the mainland.

——————————

Tag list: @thelocalpogue @maaybanks @thatsme-johnbookerroutledge @drewstarkey @ssjiara @bluebirdsbluebells @spilledtee @maebanks @tomfreakinghollandneedsaoscar @outerbongs @ilovejjmaybank @marvel-writer

Soooo, I’m posting for the first time in a LONG time. This definitely isn’t my best work buuut I thought it’d be fun to put something out there after being gone for so long. I hope you guys like it! Feel free to send requests and feedback if you’d like!

#outer banks #outer banks imagines #outer banks fics #obx #obx imagines #obx blurbs #obx fics #jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank blurbs #jj maybank fics #jj imagine #jj blurbs #jj fics #jj maybank angst #jj maybank fluff #this is trash but it’s fine

[northcarolinanative]

𝐁𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐌𝐞

Requested by @maybebanks : K so y/n and jj have a little thing going as pogues and they always flirt, one day when they want to take their relationship to the next level and they are drunk, they are about to hook up and jj takes off her shirt, he sees loads of bruises and asks her how because he’s protective. She gets really defensive and denies anything. The next day at John b’s house y/n brings it up because he is really worried. Y/n lies again but jj has never looked more worried. They side with him and y/n storms away, she gets abused at home. The pogues corner her and force her to tell the truth, she does and they all hug?

A/N: I am sooo sorry that this took so long. I really wanted to do it justice and did not want to romanticize abuse in any way shape or form, because I see that too often. If you are going through anything like this at all or feel like the character, please, please, please, reach out to someone you feel that you can trust. The first step is the hardest, but in the long run will help so much. 

TW: Mentions of Abuse, Angst 

John B, Kie, and Pope all sat in the lounging beach chair that encircled the fire that we all had built behind the Chateau. I walked out carrying the next round of beer, but this time just bringing the whole case, pouring them into the ice cooler. I grabbed myself one, tossing one across the way to Kie. I stood up opening my own. 

“Mind bringing me, one princess” JJ called from the Hammock. I grabbed a second can from the cooler walking over before flicking water from my hands on to JJ. “That so not cool” 

I sat down on the opposite side of the Hammock. “If we’re getting wet now…” JJ said in a soft quiet voice, followed by a chuckle. His comment caused my cheeks to blush as I shot glare his way before looking around to see if any of the other pogues had heard his comment. JJ and I were in a weird place. We flirted like middle schoolers, one of us always going at it with the other and vice versa. I wondered how the other pogues could breathe with the amount of tension between the two of us sometimes. I was not in the place for a relationship of any kind. My parents liked to remind me of that often, that if I did not change how I acted or looked that boys wouldn’t take an interest in me. They were right, I had a lot of personal work to do. JJ flirts with everyone though, so I don’t take it too seriously. 

The night was filled with drinking games, chugging contests, and other events that lead to our very intoxicated state. Everyone was slumped over and slightly slurring their words. “Never have I ever…” John B looked up at the sky, trying to think. “Had sex outside, under the stars” Everyone was still. JJ slowly lifted the beer can and took a sip. 

“You kinky little bitch” Kie laughed along with the rest of us. I looked up at the stars, they felt like everything was rotating around me. I am the center of the universe. I am drunk. 

“Your turn Kie,” Pope told her. 

Reading the group she said “Never have I ever wanted to go to sleep right now” 

The group laughed in unison and we all began to sit up and gather things. JJ leaned over to where I was, now, sitting up in the hammock we were sharing. “I’m gonna stay out here, watch the fire die down, stay with me?” I nodded. 

“Of course. Don’t want our baby to get scared out here in the dark.” I laughed. The other three started their way back to the house, turning around and realizing that we had not followed. 

“Y’all coming inside or?” John B called 

“Gonna head in after the fire dies down dude” JJ called back. They all waved and JJ and I watched them go inside. Moments after the door shut JJ pulled me down into him. I flinched a little as he pulled me toward him, his hand directly on a bruise on my lower back. I quickly tried to play it off as a yawn, I thought he didn’t notice, but he did. 

His breath was warm on my skin before I felt his lips brush against mine. I was shocked at first. I was not sure where this came from. I moved back and kissed him back moving my hands into his hair. What was he doing? Hell, what was I doing? 

He pulled away and moved his lips to my neck briefly. “Why don’t we add having sex outside to your ‘never have I ever’ list?” JJ breathed into my ear making me giggle. We were still spinning and I went back to kissing him. It was spark after spark his hand found their way to my shirt slowly pushing it up and off behind me in the hammock. JJ slowly started kissing down my chest, slowly sucking on the skin. He let his eyes travel down. Then he saw it. His heart stopped and he sobered up quickly, His mind moving fast. 

“JJ?” I looked at him. “Why’d you-” I followed his eyes down to where he was looking. I saw the bruises on both of my sides, being illuminated by the dying fire. 

“Y/N?” JJ backed away a little looking back down. My buzz was still there but I was sobering up quickly. I tried to keep my hands from shaking. As they were still rested on JJ’s shoulders, I did not want to give myself away. The bruises had come from my father, he was not the best, he provided the things I needed, but if I did not do as he expected, that is how he relayed the message. This time it was because you had stayed out with the pogues too long. John B’s van had broken down, meaning you had a long wait to get home, and that was unacceptable.

“Who did this to you?” I felt JJ tense up as he asked the question. I felt bad for the lie that I was about to tell him, but he has his own problems to worry about, with his dad. I did not need the others worrying about me either. 

“JJ no one did this to me.” I laughed slightly, it didn’t sound convincing, but I hoped that it was enough for JJ. “I feel cleaning the boat the other day, it was a nasty fall, between the boat and the dock.” I looked at him trying to read his expression. He didn’t say anything just kept looking between my eyes and the bruises. “The fire is pretty much dead, let’s just go to bed” I stood up and grabbed my shirt turning to face away from him, I began to put my shirt on, and that’s when he saw the healing bruise on your back. He knew I had lied to him. 

“Y/N, where did the bruise on your back come from then?” JJ asked. I had completely forgotten about that one. 

“JJ you know I’m clumsy!” I fired back, my tone becoming defensive. JJ got up from the hammock.

“You know you can talk to me, about anything? 

“Just drop it okay? Nothings wrong, nothings going on, I’m fine!” I said, turning back toward the house. I walked inside to find Kie passed out on the left side of the pullout. I pulled the covers back and slipped into the right side. 

“Everything alright?” Kie mumbled sleepily. “I thought I heard you and JJ bickering?” 

“Haha nothing serious, Dude thinks he’s a better surfer than me.” Another lie. I hated it, but I didn’t want anyone to worry about me, I was fine. Kie nodded and rolled back over. I settled down in bed before I fell asleep. I heard JJ enter the back porch and rustle around some cans, I guessed he was sleeping on the couch out there tonight.  

-- 

JJ was woken up by John B moving about in the back yard cleaning up from the night before. He rubbed his eyes and stretched out a bit, the back couch was probably the least comfortable of the options in the house. He walked back out to John B, sitting in one of the chairs. He ran a hand through his hair, staring out over the water. “Everything okay JJ?”John B said, pulling JJ out of his thoughts. 

“Yea” He breathed. “Well not really, no,” he said standing up to help John B pick up the trash. 

“I heard you and Y/N out here last night, what was that about?” He questioned. 

“Dude I don’t know, but I’m worried.” He said John B looked at him confused. “We were…” JJ coughed and cleared his throat “Anyway, she had bruises, all over her stomach and her back. When I asked about it she said that they came from falling off the boat because she was clumsy” 

“Okay?” John B questioned, he did not want to believe what JJ was getting at. “Maybe she was telling the truth.” He asked

“No,” JJ said quickly. “You weren’t there, They were bad, some were healing already, it was not just like fall, They were bad John B.” He began to pace around the small circle. “Some’s hurting her JB. I have to figure out who it is, get her away from them.” He started to get angry, throwing the empty beer can harshing onto the ground. He thought about how sweet I was to him when he would come to after a bad run-in with his dad, or how I patch up all the boys after they got in it with one of the kooks, or even when I was there, letting Kie cry on your shoulder after her parents getting angry with her for not choosing the kook life. “She doesn’t deserve this” 

John B and JJ headed inside to find Pope scrounging through the food in the pantry, and Kie sitting up on her elbows. She exhaled smoke, but put a finger to her lips, pointing at me, still sleeping. JJ looked at me, his eyes soft, causing Kie and Pope to exchange a confused glance with one another. John B patted JJ’s shoulder “Lets help Pope make some grub, yea?” He said trying to pull JJ out of his thoughts.

I woke up to the sight of everyone in the kitchen laughing. I sat up looking at my friends. “Y’all started the fun without me?” I joked. I leaned against the headboard, pulling my knees up to my chest just to watch the four try and cook. This did not happen often, so I might as well savor it. 

“Look who’s finally up! Sleeping beauty!” Kie laughed. 

“Haha” I said rolling my eyes.”After last weeks party you were dead to the world till the next night” She glared at me playfully before laughing

“That is only half true” 

JJ began making his way beside me. The events of last night, the moments between the two of us. If the fire had only been slightly dimmer ,I would be experiencing something completely different, awkward feeling. He sat on the bed next to me, pulling me in closer by wrapping his arm around your shoulder. Pope and Kie looked at John B who just shrugged his shoulders and continued cracking eggs. The other pogues continued their work with breakfast. 

“I’m worried about you” JJ spoke softly, so only you could hear him. I quickly glanced over at the other busy pogues, before looking at JJ. His eyes were dark, he looked tired, and the worry looked evident on his face. 

“JJ, look” I whispered, running a hand through my hair and letting out a deep breath. “I told you I’m clumsy.” I looked him in the eye, but quickly looked down. “You have nothing to worry about.” 

He grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him. This caught the attention of the other pogues. “Look me in the eye and tell me. Look me in the eye and tell me not to worry.” JJ said in a normal voice. Everyone was looking at us now. My face turned red and tears started to form in my eyes. Everyone was looking at me. I had lied to all of them. I froze looking between JJ and the group. 

“Tell him not to worry about what Y/N” Pope spoke slowly. 

“Nothing! Do not worry about me!” I said firmly. I got up quickly feeling the hot tears begin to fall down my face as I quickly walked out the back door of the Chateau. I walked into the yard seeing the hammock that JJ and I had laid in the night before and I stopped. 

“Y/N! Wait” I heard JJ yell and he came up behind me. He followed my eyes to the hammock. “I know what I saw Y/N. I just want to help” 

I felt the sobs trying to fight their way out. I did not want to lie to my friends anymore. I did not want them to see me differently, how I see myself, but especially how my parents see me. JJ noticed me crying. “You can trust us Y/N” 

“You wanna know where the bruises came from JJ?” I breathed out, a breath I realized I was holding in.  “My parents JJ, that’s who. I’m not the daughter they expected okay?” I finally felt the sobs leaving my throat as I fell to my knees crying. I held my face in my hands. JJ was quick to run beside me rubbing my back. 

“Oh Princess. You don’t deserve this. Believe me you do not deserve this.” He felt a tear of his own leave his eye before quickly wiping it away. The others were standing on the porch. When I calmed down, my breathing had started to even out, JJ asked if I wanted to go back inside to join the others, who left to give us some privacy. 

When we walked in Kie was the first to practically tackle me in a hug, then JJ, John B, and finally Pope. I felt loved in that moment, like I always did when I was surrounded by the pogues. When they all pulled away Kie put both hands on either of my shoulders. “Never hesitate to reach out to one of us for help, or even to talk, we’re here for you, just as much as you are here for us, ok?” 

“Ok.” I sigh before pulling her back into a hug. She walked back into the kitchen. JJ pulled on my arm, sitting me down next to him. He wrapped his hand in mine, before placing a kick kiss to it. 

“I didn't mean to pry like that. I just want you to be safe Y/N” I leaned my head on his shoulder. 

“I know J. I'm sorry for lying to you. In a weird way, it feels better to have it out there.”

“We’re gonna help you get to a better place” He spoke softly before placing a kiss to my forehead.

#jj x reader #jj imagine #jj fic #jj outer banks #jj maybank #obx netflix #obx #obx imagine #outer banks #outer banks imagine #outerbanks imagine #outer banks netflix #jj masterlist #jj imagines #rudy pankow #pope hayward #john b routledge #kiara cerrara

[omgreally]

The Apprentice Read on AO3

Pairing: Din Djarin/F!Reader Rating: E for Explicit, Of Course Wordcount: 5k+ Summary: Peli Motto took you off the streets of Tatooine to become one of the best apprentices she's ever had - but honestly, the DUM droids are setting the bar pretty low. Still, you work out well for the first few months until an armored Mandalorian stranger lands with a busted-up ship and a strange magic baby and, well, you're intrigued. Even though you know you shouldn't be. Peli's always teling you to keep away from anything hot but sometimes, to fix something, you have to stick your hand straight into the fire.

Chapter One  - The Arrival

“Hey, Peli! We got some hunk o’ junk requesting to land. Want me to tell him where to shove his rusty old comm signal?”

The older woman cranes over your shoulder as you swivel in the rickety chair in front of the array of control and communication panels. You’ve been working at Hangar Three-Five for a few months now, and you know it takes all sorts of ‘customers’ to keep a place like this running - but honestly. You’re surprised the wreck requesting the bay can even fly.

You’re even more surprised when Peli takes one look at the screen and shoves you out of the chair, hastily pressing the transmit button.

“Clearin’ you to land, Razor Crest,” she says hurriedly. “Sorry for the delay.” She takes her hand off the button and straightens to glare at you. “Never assume like that again, Girl,” she says,  using your least favourite nickname for you. “That hunk o’ junk just might be my favorite customer.”

You gape at her as you brush off your coveralls. “You serious, Peli? I mean - are you sure, ma’am? I couldn’t even see a transponder code from that...vessel.” You choose your words a bit more carefully now, reminded that while Peli has a heart of gold, she has the temper of a Tusken.

“I’ve been workin’ in this hangar since you were a babe sucklin’ at your momma, Girl,” Peli says, pointing a wrench at you. “You’d do well to listen to me more’n you do.”

“Sorry, ma’am,” you sigh, looking down at the ground.

“Now, go on to the market, why don’tcha, and pick us up somethin’ for dinner. You may have a head thick as bantha hide, Girl, but at least you’re better at negotiating than the Dums.” You wince. You know you’re just an apprentice, but damn if it doesn’t sting whenever Peli compares you to the droids.

It’s not that you don’t like them. They just...creep you out a little. Soulless little machines, scuttling around as if they’re alive when they’re just - not. Whoever invented droids was one sick carosi pup.

Peli hands you a pouch of credits - the amount of which is dwindling daily. You wonder if the engineer’s eagerness to house this beaten-up old scupper doesn’t have something to do with their lack of funds. You consider offering to forego your wages until things are better - Peli has shown you incredible kindness, taking you in off the street when your next best bet was working as a dancing girl in one of Mos Eisley’s less reputable cantinas. Who knew where you woul’dve ended up after that. You prefer this, even though it’s hard, physical work, and you’re often up to your elbows in engine grease and covered head to toe in grime and oil.

Who knew starships were so dirty.They make sense, though, and you quickly proved that you had an aptitude for it. For pulling things apart and putting them back together again, but working. You’ve fixed busted motivators and blown capacitors that even left Peli scratching her head. You suppose that, rather than sentimentality, is why she keeps you around.

Either way, your life is pretty comfortable, now. Boring, but comfortable.   You hope the credits situation isn’t going to change that.

How little you know.

---

You wander through the market, credits pouch too light in your pocket as you peruse the food stalls. You really don’t feel like dried krayt jerky a hundredth night in a row, so you’re glad Peli sent you out, but you are struggling to find something that is a) appealing and perhaps more importantly, b) affordable.

You end up in a heated argument - no, discussion - with a Toydarian over some deep-fried gorg before you give up, your temper and your impatience too piqued to settle on a decent price. You calm yourself with a trip past a stall selling all manner of imported cloth and fabrics: beautiful, delicate things, things you are not. A scarf made of deep blue silk that shimmers iridescent in the harsh sunlight catches your eye. You pause, running your fingers over it, your dirty, chipped nails a contrast to the smooth, satiny surface. 

“It would suit you, pretty girl,” says a deep, male voice. You look up into the eyes of the stallholder. He’s a surprisingly handsome man, tall, with dark skin and hair and muscles bulging from a vest that seems tactically selected to show off as much of his bare chest as possible. For someone selling fabric, he’s certainly not wearing a lot of it.

“Sorry,” you say, taking your hand back. “I haven’t got enough credits for something like that.” The ‘pretty girl’ rankled you. You’re aware, tangentially, that underneath the layers of grease and oil you have features that some might consider comely, even attractive, and your body was good enough to catch the attention of some of the seedier businessmen when you were on the street. But it is the assumption itself that you are nothing more than your face and your body that bothers you. 

“Suit yourself, gorgeous,” he calls after you as you walk away, back towards the smell of roasting meat. “I’ll be here if you change your mind!”

You grab a few deep-fried gorg from the Toydarian after all, a bottle of blue milk, and head back to the hangar in a thoughtful mood.

---

The ship has already landed by the time you get back.

It looks like it’s falling apart at the seams. In fact, you can spot several missing panels from the ground. Up close, you’re even more astonished that it managed to fly.

The ramp is stuck half-down, and you stand on your tiptoes to peer inside. It doesn’t look much better in there than on the outside. Dingy durasteel, crates all over the place, pathetic excuse for a hold, really. How can this be Peli’s ‘favourite customer’? It looks like it needs a complete teardown. Not even a rebuild, just...tear it down. It’s not even worthy to be a garbage hauler, it’s only suitable to be the garbage getting hauled. It-

“Like what you see?” 

You almost drop the bags of food and produce and manage to avoid most of it flying everywhere, save for a single pale blue pika fruit that escapes and rolls across the ground to land against the stranger’s boot. You scuttle forward to grab it, and your hand is intercepted by a gloved one, yellow fingers closing around the fruit and lifting it from your view.

You straighten and look up, up, up into the Beskar helm of a Mandalorian.

“Oh,” you say in a very small voice. Now you understand.

You’ve heard and seen tales of Mandalorians - quite a legendary one lived here for a time, not that long ago - and some of those tales were from Peli herself. She’d never mentioned that she knew one, though. 

This one is about the same as you imagine a Mandalorian to be. Armored from head to toe, no part of him visible, his eyes shielded by the inscrutable blackness of the T-shaped visor in his helm. 

He can probably see everything, though, from your heartbeat down to the anxious flush in your skin as he steps toward you and says “Here.” He slips the pika fruit back into your bag and you nod, swallowing the sudden lump in your throat.

“Thanks.”

You stand there awkwardly for a moment while he just stares at you, as if he’s a droid himself, scanning you up and down through that damn visor. You clear your throat and cock your hip, placing your hand on it and raising your eyebrows.

“Is this your ship”?” You tap your knuckles against the hull behind you, miraculously not making another panel or part fall off. “What did you do to it?

“What?” His stance changes a little; he stands up a little straighter, his shoulders set, his hands hanging down by his sides with a little more purpose than before. Posturing, you think, that’s all it is, although you’re now a little nervous as you answer.

Because he is broad. Broad and well-built, if the fit of the armor is anything to go by. He could crush your head like a pika fruit without even trying.

Still, it has to be said, for a ship like that...“It looks like it’s about to fall apart,” you say, trying for diplomatic, but by tempering your vehemence it just sounds like you’re complaining. 

The Mandalorian shrugs. “That’s why I brought it here.”

“Well, Peli is the best mechanic on Mos Eisley,” you capitulate, and you relax a little, enough to walk past him towards the control room. “I’m just surprised she’s not so picky with her clientele.”

“From what I hear, she can’t afford to be.” That stops you in your tracks. The Mandalorian has followed you, of course, and he’s right behind you as you enter the building and head to the kitchenette to put away dinner. 

“You shouldn’t listen to everything you hear, Mandalorian,” you say as you unpack the bag of measly meat, fruit and vegetables you managed to get. It goes all in the cooler for a later barbeque. That is one of the things you enjoy most about being here - sitting with Peli in front of a makeshift campfire, cooking and talking. Not about anything in particular, just...talking.

“Well, if I’m wrong, I can just take my ships and my credits elsewhere,” the Mandalorian says with a shrug. It’s then you notice that he has a pouch he’s holding up, and it hangs heavy and clinks promisingly when it moves. You lick your lips nervously, hoping you’re not about to fuck up some big deal Peli has struck with this bounty hunter warrior.

Hoping you’re not about to be shot by this bounty hunter warrior.

“For example, I know the upkeep costs around here have risen recently,” he says, letting the pouch sway back and forth, and your eyes follow it like hypnosis. “Thanks to Peli taking on an apprentice…”

You sigh. “How much?”

“Five thousand.”

You do some quick maths in your head. “Might not cover any major components that need replacing, but it’s a start. You’ll have a vacuum seal again at least.”

“Good.” The Mandalorian tosses you the pouch and you catch it with both hands. It feels heavier than five thousand, but you’ll give it to Peli first. Speaking of - where the hell is Peli?

“There, how does that feel? Look at you, who’s a handsome li’l womp rat? You are!” 

You have never heard Peli talk to anyone like that. You and the Mandalorian follow the sound of her voice out into the control room, and you find her cradling what looks like a small, wrinkled green baby, a creature with the face of a frog and ears of a bat, slightly damp and wrapped in what looks like-

“Is that - my shirt?” you ask, horrified. The creature blinks and coos at you.

“Had to give Grogu here a bath and I didn’t have any clean towels. So I borrowed your shirt. Look how cute he looks in it!” Peli tries to hand you the creature but you step out of the way. This is not how you saw your day going.

“Look, the Mandalorian here wants us to fix his ship,” you say. “He’s giving us five thousand.” You set the pouch down on the control panel. “I’m pretty sure it can be done, but if there are any busted capacitors or modulators that need fixing, that bill’s gonna go way up.”

“It’ll do,” Peli nods. “Meantime, I’ll look after this little guy. You even give him a bath last time I saw you? Don’t answer that, Mando.” Mando. So that’s what they call him. He doesn’t even have a name, just a shortening of  his title.

“Guess I’ll get to work on the ship,” you grumble, rolling your eyes as you head back out into the hot Tattooine suns.  Boring but comfortable. Yeah, right.

---

If this generates some interest I may continue to post chapters here! Otherwise, go ahead and read on AO3.

#the mandalorian fanfic #din djarin/reader #din djarin x female reader #mando x you #the apprentice

[popculturebuffet]

Scott Pilgrim’s Precious Little Life Review

Happy Birthday To Me, as I continue my birthday celebration by taking a look at comics that have a personal connection to me.. And for our main feature, i’m taking a look at the first volume of a series that was vitally important to a teenage me, Scott Pilgrim. 

Scott Pilgrim is the brainchild of Brian Lee’O’Malley. O’Malley came up with the concept from a number of things. Being a fan of the band Plumtree, O’Malley was curious about the name of their song “Scott Pilgrim” and wondered who this Scott Pilgrim guy was. So over the years he slowly built the guy up in the back of his mind using bits of his life and what not. As for why he ends up fighting 7 evil exes, that came from a discussion with his then girlfriend, later wife and currently ex-wife Hope Larson, where he threw off the joke that her exes should form some kind of League. After finishing his first solo work Lost at Sea, O’Malley decided Scotty would be his next project and the rest is history. To date while O’Malley has written two works since, Seconds which is delightful and Snotgirl which didn’t grab me but I intend to try again, Scott remains his most popular work, in large part due to it’s SUBLIME video game and movie adaptations, the former of which is finally getting a rerelease next month. 

The series charm is in it’s style: A manga styled comic that combines two desperate kinds of story: Shonen Fight Manga and Slice of Life Indie Comics. The story shifts from Scott going through normal life stuff while trying to make his new relationship work and get his shit together and Scott getting into big bombastic fights with his new sweetie’s exes for the right to keep dating her and to you know, stay alive. The series effortlesly blends a video game like world with real grounded characters and is wonderful for it.  As for where I came in, one Free Comic Book day I found a little comic named Free Scott Pilgrim, which I genuinely loved and was instantly charmed by it’s humor and well done art. So I picked up the second and third volumes of the series proper and the first once I could find it and the rest ,as they say, is history. For my high school life, this was one of hte most important things in it and I wrote fanfiction, which I thankfully never put online and in general enjoyed the hell out of the series. Then I just kind of.. let it sit on my shelf for a while. It wasn’t BAD, I just never got back to it and as the franchise went dormant I just sorta slept on it and the movie and that part of me...

Cut to a few weeks ago, when Comixology did a massive sale for black friday that marked a ton of Graphic Novels down to just 1 buck each, and the color editions of Scott Pilgrim happened to be part of this, though only volume 1 was that cheap. But thanks to my best friend micheal and an early christmas/birthday present I got the rest and got to revisit the series as a whole, with me rethinking my previous thoughts of volume 1 and thus.. wanting to review it and share both why this series is so damn special and what’s good, and what’s not so good about it. I’ll also be covering the game, once i’ts re-released, and the movie once i’m finsihed with the comics so look out for that. And get ready to take a trip to the glorious land of canada... 

As a heads up and as you can tell i’ll be using the color version as while I could get scans of the black and white, I prefer the color version. While the black and white was fine and always will be, I think the impressive coloring job really adds to thing and makes the already great fight scenes pop more, as well as making certain background elements stand out a bit. While it does negate the black and white gags, the tradeoff is more than worth it. That being said either version is fine so if you can get the black and white cheaper that’s fine and i’ve kept my original copies, with volumes 4 -6 having been picked up as they came out. 

So as our story starts we meet our hero: Scott Pilgrim Age 23, a charming but jobless and kind of sketchy possible college graduate whose really been adrift in his life since a breakup about a year ago. And when our story opens he’s taken a turn for a worse and decided to date sweet but naive and inexperinced Knives Chau, a 17 year old girl. And why yes the power dynamics there are messed up and why yes Scott is pretty damn sketchy in this moment in time, and while yes I am aware the age of consent in canada is 16, it dosen’t make this any less greasy and the story knows that.  And how it knows that MOST of his friends aren’t on board. The only ones who seems to is Stephen Stiles, leader of Sex Bomb-Omb, the band scott’s in with one of the best names ever and even then it’s hard to tell if he’s being sarcastic or just a total douche. The other, Young Neil Nordgraf, Stephen’s roomate, is well 19 or 20 and kind of a dipshit so we just ignore him. I used to use him as kind of a projection, to put myself in the adventure when I was younger as Neil kind of lacks personality in the comics but in the comics.. he’s not hte best or most complex character. He is great in the movie though and Edgar Wright did an amazing job fleshing him out.  The rest of his circle are .. not so permissive. His best friend, roomate and king of all gays for all time Wallace Wells very much does not want to come with Scott to school to pick her up because every part of that sentence after hurt to type. Granted Scott gets him to come with him with promises of boys, but frankly knowing wallace he was probably just playing along/wants to protect this poor child. His ex and fellow bandmate Kim is clearly bothered by it and is flat out worried Scott is taking advantage of her. Kim and Wallace are easily my faviorites both for personality and because I have a massive crush on both. With Wallace it just didn’t manifest till the reread. Finally Scott’s kid sister Stacey chews him out over it before genuinely wondering if he’s gone insane or he’s actually happy. For my two cents: he’s not. He WANTS to be, but he dosen’t know how. And as someone whose both neurotypical, which given Scott’s troubles with empathy and relating to people like yours truly I strongly suggest he is, and has struggled with depression I can relate to that. He wants to move on but he just.. can’t, he just wants to get past the haze he’s been in since Envy dumped him.. but he dosen’t know how. So instead of doing someting constructive or finding a job or anything .. he just took the first and easiest way out of his depression he could. I’ve done that with video games and stuff. Scott did that by entering a relationship that’s really easy, requires only so much effort, and is with someone who utterly adores, looks up to him and will never expect better. Being with Knives makes him feel better.. but it dosen’t MAKE him a better person. As i’ve made clear dating someone just for a boost makes him actively worse and had fate not intervened, I shudder to think what Scott might have become. That being said his actoins are still creepy and since Scott has a habit of landing ass backwards into being an asshole here’s a counter to track that. That’s 2 for doing this overall, one for tleling her to be good, and 1 for trying to ply wallace with underage boys. 

Your the Scum of the Earth Scott Counter: 1

Thankfully fate does and Scott’s dreams, ones of him crawling through a desert alone, are interupted by a mysterious pink haired girl on skates. The next day he’s just sort of in a daze, kind of confused, and even more so when he sees her IN REAL LIFE, while at the library with Knives. He’s understandably frazzled but ends up finding out he’s not hallucinating when talking to MIcheal Cormeau. Micheal is a minor character and another artist and friend of o malley’s who represents that one guy in social circles who knows everybody. And indeed he knows the mystery girl, Ramona Flowers and that she’s there. Scott TRIES talking her up but just creeps her out, so Scott goes with plan b and decides to ask around about her. Enter Sandra and Monique, two college aquantinces of Scott, who just sorta show up at major events and aren’t that developed or intresting. They turn him to Julie who forbids him to date her. To which I say. 

Naturually we’ll aslo be needing a counter for this. 

Shut Up Julie Counter: 1

Scott however did find out she’s a delivery girl for Amazon Canada, and thus orders some CD’s on Wallace’s Credit card to hopefully see her. And while his behavior IS obessive.. it’s understandable. I’d be weirdly obessed with finding someone too if they showed up in my dreams every day and were apparently a real person. I’d probably play it cooler but still i’ts kind of understandable. So after a day with knives in which he’s clearly checked out she kisses him, he freaks out and it’s very clear that while Scott’s good at attracting women he’s just.. not good with his emotions and has finally woken up to how messed up this is, but has no idea how to get out now he’s intrested in someone he actually has a future with maybe.  Speaking of Scott’s package and Ramona finally arrive. Scott’s move is to.. ask her out abrubtly but after he mentions her Dreams, Ramona finally puts two and two together and explains things: She’s been using Subspace, a seris of highways connected by the subconcious and apparently more common in america, though it’s later revealed she was taught this but being the first book with a lot of the lore and what not ironed out this is fine. Point is she was just using his dreams as transit and didn’t mean to get him obessed. Scott continues to try his schtick and eventually gets her to agree to hang out with him. Why she does I generally do not know, as SCott basically fell ass backwards over himself conversationally, but whatever. If he didn’t succeed we wouldn’t have a plot. 

That being said things pick up a bit with the date though. The scene is really good and simply just the two.. talking. Having plesant conversations getting to know one another. That good stuff. it’s just really nice to read and it’s hard to explain why. Highlights include Scott’s x-men patch, Ramona not wanting to talk about her last job and Scott admitting he hasn’t been obessed in a long time.. and it comes off sweet rather htan creepy like that sounds. It just means he hasn’t fell this head over heels felt like this. As I said Knives was easy.. but this is hard.. and this.. feels right. So as things Snow Ramona yanks scott through subspace to escape the blizzard. 

So we end up back at Ramona’s place and she offers some tea which leads to one of the best gags of the volume as she lists them off: 

So Ramona goes to get Scott a blanket, Scott ends up following finds her changing, and she decides to warm him up another way.. by embracing him... cue.. the inevitible really. 

It feels organic though: The two are clearly attracted to each other and while Scott came on as strong as freaking colossus, he still rebounded well once they hung out and he could relax a bit and show the scott underneath the lairs of dumbass. The two end up cuddling in bed and Scott seems..genuiley happy saying he needed this... awwwwwww. They part the next morning with him asking her to his band’s performance. 

So Scott finds Wallace  at home who says what Scott needs to hear “You need to break up with your fake highschool girlfriend scott’ Granted the entire first 40 pages could’ve been titled that but now he’s actively cheating. He’s also got a letter. 

It’s a death threat Scott barely grazes through, just like an email earlier. 

But scott’s more concerned with his emotional distress.. i.e. the consequences of his throughly shitty actions finally hitting him in the face. 

Scott heads to practice for his gig and can’t bring himself to break up with knives, but does find out about the opposition: Crash and the Boys, based on an NES game title because of course it is. Crash, their leader, Joel their baseplayer who scott hates because he hates all other baseplayers (”I don’t hate myself kim) and Trasha, an 8 year old progedy they found playing Drum Mania. Don’t ask me what that is, i’m not going to get every refrence. 

So at the show Scott runs into Stacey and her new boyfriend Jimmy  with Stacey being supportive. And then Knives shows up and then RAMONA SHOWS UP. Oh no scott’s cheating might be discovered! 

So Scott books it while we’re introduced to Crash and the Boys. Wallace heckles them, to the band’s annoyance, until they eventually get fed up and we easly get the best gag of the volume. I was wrong this clearly tops the tea thing. 

So Crash and The Boys continue to play their set, including a song that supposdely kills the audience but really knocks them out.. which of course bothers kim because they play next. Meanwhile Ramona and Stacey meet and the two really get along.. and come back to find the audience ko’d and Wallace Making out with Stacey’s boyfriend. Oh no! Which is a dick move, no question. But Stacey’s next move is questionable even for a 19 year old: She says “You won’t steel another guy from me and tells wallace to sit over there”. Okay Stacey even if he is bi, and this series has trouble with the concept of bisexuals we’ll get into that later trust me, he made out with someone else entirely while on a date with you. Wallace is still an asshole, it’s part of his charm.. but it dosen’t change the fact your date kissed someone else seconds after you were gone and has been eyballing him all night, as seen even above. He’s not into you as you thought, just accept it, move on, and kick Jimmy in the balls and then wallace like a proper lady. So Scott prepares to play and this happens

And it’s here, at the very end of the comic the series main premise finally kicks in and the world takes it’s true shape. It’s a world where an indie comedy about a mess of a being putting his life together after finding his dream girl.. also has said mess being forced to get into fist fights with wizards, movie stars, vegans, half-ninjas, twin roboticists and a katana wielding douchenozzle record exec in order to continue to have the right to date his girlfriend. 

It’s where the series charm comes from and really what made it a huge sucess so it’s no suprise this volume perks up immensley for the climax. I’ll get more into it’s pacing problem at the end. For now it’s fight time and as we find out in a hilarious and awesome turn.. Scott is the best fighter in toronto.. which just makes me REALLLY want a Scott Pilgrim version of letterkenny. I mean who wouldn’t want to see wayne fight some guy who can turn his hands into dragons or see Squireely Dan do E.Honda’s hand slap move from streetfighter or see the skids all fuse into one mega emo. It’s just.. the possiblities are as endless as they are wonderous and I want this now. 

But yeah as Patel is both the first boss and Scott’s first real opponent Scott.. handles him really easily. This was by design as O’Malley wanted a shonen progression to the fights.. and honestly it’s a great way to do things. Since the fights are styled after shonen and video games, and both have power based progression in bad guys and threats, it just made sense. Patel.. is just pathetic even with his magic powers, and his habit of sending letters and emails just pounds it in. Though he is right to be a bit pissed Scott didn’t read a letter he hand delivered in a snowstorm. That’s just a tad rude. 

Mid-Fight, Scott, now he knows the whole evil ex boyfriend thing, wonders what Matt and Ramona’s past is and while Matthew refuses to tell.. Ramona spills easily. It was midddle school, all the jocks wanted her for whatever reason, likely because from experince in high school, guys really like indie girls. Matthew was the only non-white non jock, so they teamed up and with her strength and his mystic powers they beat them.. but since his use had dried up, she flipped him off and left.  Matthew dosen’t take this well and summons demon hipster chicks to fight while Scott and co, minus ramona, fight back with a finger gun routine and block his fire balls before propelling Scott into matthew somehow, and landing the KO Evil Exes Left: 6 Matthew bursts into coins though fun fact, O’Malley says the Exes all respawned back at home afterwords and learned their lesson. With Pattel I genuinely don’t think he did... but clearly given his penchant for formality what with the letters and emails, he probably felt it’d break protocol to attack before the rest were done. He probably jsut formed a hipster emo band and found more sucess using his magic for that instead and just forgot about the whole thing. Could be wrong but that’s what i’m going with.  So Scott asks Ramona to go out with him then make out with him, both of which she says yes to. Nice one scotty boy. Ramona then explains the whole evil exes thing: He’ll have to defeat each one as they come after him, and while Scott wonders if they’ll come one at a time Ramona’s not sure. As time will bear out, Scott is MOSTLY correct as most exes take him one on one, with the exception of the twins. But since as I said earlier the twins are basically one person, and as we’ll find out by choice, so it’s an exception. Plus their the last step before the final boss, so by that token it’s a bit fairer to have the penultimate boss get an unfair advantage. Scott is fine with that, he and Ramona share another moment and a kiss.. but Scott makes the mistake of asking if gideon is one and Ramona’s head starts glowing with her dodging the subject, though still going out with SCott and him worried.. it just feels.. off. not a bad ending but the only one of the series three cliffhanger endings that just dosen’t work for me, especailly since it is a bit before the Gideon mystery really picks up steam again. But with that we close this chapter

FINAL THOUGHTS:

Precious Little Life is a decent start to the story.  While Scott is loathsome at first, he’s still a compelling character and does get more likeable as things go, the humor when it is there shines and is one of the series best assets and while the fight is short and only at the end, it is oh so glorious especailly in cover with the impacts taking cues from the movie. It’s a good intro to Scott’s world and ther’es a reason the movie adapts this book the closest as it sets up the cast and premise well, with only Stephen Stiles feeling a bit off and ONLY for the first few chapters.  The volume is only really held back by it’s pacing, as before Scott runs into ramona in his dream the story feels a bit sluggish as we’re just watching some douche date a high school kid. While it is necessary to set up the world, it just dosen’t have the snappy pacing the series would be known for and that makes the rest of the series more charming. it’s nto BAD.. but it’s not FANTASTIC like the series would become. What keeps it from being bad is simple: These aren’t general badness signs but more just O’Malley coming into his owna nd getitng better and better as the book goes, to the point that by the next book the pacing is much better and by book 3 onwards he has it down pat.  Overall not a BAD volume but certaionly the weakest of the bunch.. which given it’s still really good says something about the ride we’re in for. I’ll be back sometime in the future, likely january. Yup i’m taking on YET ANOTHER PROJECT. but since this one, while clearly exausting and time consuimg, is much shorter in overall length, and i’m still proritizing the three I have running over this, I think i’ll be just fine. Until next time, have a happy holiday. 

#scott pilgrim #scott pilgrims precious little life #ramona flowers #wallace wells #kim pine #stephen styles #knives chau #neil nordgraf #julie powers #matthew pattel #gideon #crash and the boys #reviews #comics #oni press #micheal comereau #stacey pilgrim

[stillebesat]

White Lies (5/5)

Sanders Sides: Deceit, Virgil, Logan, Roman, Patton Sequel to Little Lies Blurb: Deceit has been stuck in his ‘role’ as Dilyn for almost a year now. It’s about time he changed that. Fic Type: Hurt/Comfort, Tiny!Sides Inspiration: From @yay-cats9‘s wonderful Fanart she did for Little Lies. <3 Again thank you for the artwork! I love it! Overall Fic Warnings: Deceit, Negative Self Talk, Panic/Anxiety Attacks, Manipulation talk, Kinda Imprisonment?

To Catch Up: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 

“Falsehood.”

Dee jumped, heart stuttering as Logey’s voice came from the doorway somewhere behind Virgil. Instinctively he tried to shove away from him and vanish from sight, but with Vee’s arms protectively holding Dee in place, he couldn’t go anywhere.

Trapped. 

Nononononono NO! 

Dee made a small noise of protest, flinching as soft footsteps moved closer. 

It was one thing to be pathetic in front of Virgil, the former Dark Side. 

It was completely different to show Log--

“Kiddo…” Patton whispered from just behind Vee.

A third shadowy figure appeared, highlighted by the light coming from the doorway. “We wouldn’t hate you, Dil.” Roman said.

To show the others how much of a weakling he’d become. Dee’s breath caught in his throat as he ducked his head against Virgil’s chest, taking refuge from everyone in the only place he could when he couldn’t just sync out to get away from them because he was still a freaking powerless child! 

Some Gatekeeper.

You’re pathetic. 

He hadn’t even heard the french doors open! How long had they been standing there listening--listening to him being--being--pathet--WAIT. Dee tensed, heart taking off like a hummingbird’s wings in his chest. Had the others seen him silence Vee? Had they watched him struggle to release him from his hold? What if they thought Dee had been purposely holding him captive! A long con that they walked in on, not knowing that Deceit had been trying to free Virgil. That he hadn’t meant to silence him! That it was an accid--

They’re gonna hate you for this. 

You Betrayed their trust. 

You can’t just silence the Big Four.

Monster. 

“Dee.” Virgil’s voice seemed to come from the end of a long tunnel. “Dee.” He felt fingers moving through his hair again. “Stop. Don’t--” 

S-s-stop? Stop?! How could he?! HE was DECEIT! He was the BAD guy and the others now KNEW it. He whimpered, struggling to draw air to speak. “I-I-I--” He couldn’t get the words out. He couldn’t!

They’ll hate you. 

Something pressed against his back, rubbing small circles there. “Kiddo. Kiddo please. You’re okay. You need to breathe. Can you breathe for us?” 

B-breathe? How would that help them not hate him? Dee squeezed his eyes shut, his fingers twisting into the fabric of Virigl’s hoodie so they wouldn’t accidentally grab at the air.

Yah that would be just grand if you silence them.  

They’ll hate you.

No matter what.

They will.

You can’t stop being you. 

“It’s okay, Dil--ah Dee? Dee.” Roman said as warm fingers trailed down his bare cheek, brushing at the tears that lingered there. 

Dil.

Dee flinched.

They only like you because you’ve been Dilyn.

They’ll never like Deceit.

Virgil’s arms tightened around him as Roey’s fingers paused, feather light on him. “You’re okay, my young Prince.” He soothed. 

Not okay.

Never okay.

Pathetic Gatekeeper.

Can’t even function properly without freaking out. 

Yet Dee found himself leaning into Roman’s warm palm, his hands frozen in Virgil’s hoodie. “I-I-I-” 

“Deceit.” Logan said in his usual calm tones, using Dee’s title like it was the most natural thing in the world after a year of calling him Dilyn. He placed his fingers on his arm, gently tapping in an odd pattern repeating pattern of four, seven, then eight. “You are safe with us. You are not in any danger.”

Yet. 

“Just breathe for now. Don’t try and speak just yet.” Anxiety huffed, again running his fingers through Dee’s hair. “Trust me, I know how this works.” 

“We can wait, kiddo.”

“Until you are calmer.”

“Take your time, Dil--Dee.”

“You just need to breathe for us.” Patton said, continuing to rub his back. “Breathe.” 

Breathe. They just wanted him to breathe. Dee nodded, keeping his eyes shut as he shakily lifted one hand, disrupting Logan’s tapping on his arm, to grab onto Roman’s finger’s, clinging to them like a drowning man clinging to a fraying string.  Breathe. Okay… Okay…how?  

You forgot how to breathe? 

Some Gatekeeper.

Can’t even breathe properly.

“Sometimes it helps to focus on something else.” Virgil whispered, rocking him back and forth, continuing to hold him close with one arm, while the other hand played with his hair. “Like...I don’t know...can you--do you taste something?” 

Taste? How could tasting anything help him breathe?! What sort of stupid quest-- Dee swallowed, tongue flickering out to his lips and the salty flavor coating them as Logan placed a steadying hand on his leg, just resting it there. “T-t-tears” He managed to whisper. 

“Okay.” Vee squeezed him, giving a comforting pressure all around. “That’s...well the tears aren’t good, but it’s good you can taste them.“ He exhaled. “What about two things you smell?” 

Smell? Dee drew in a shaky breath through his nose. It was--it was...“La-La-Lav.” 

“Lavender? From my hoodie?”  

He nodded, breath hitching. “Mmmm.” He buried his face deeper into Virgil’s clothes. “Mint.” He mumbled.  

“Oh!” Patton gasped, pausing in rubbing Deceit’s back. “I get it.” He whispered

That made one of them, because Dee didn’t see how this was supposed to help. 

“It makes sense Virgil’s clothes would smell so as both scents help to calm those who are feeling anxious.” Logan said, fingers again returning to tapping their four, seven, eight pattern on his leg.

“What about three things you hear, my young Prince?” Roman asked. “Can you tell us that?”

It was who he didn’t want to hear currently. Dee hunched his shoulders. It was easier to admit his insecurities when it was just him and Vee, but facing- “Y-you Three.” He whispered. It wasn’t easy. Obviously. He grimaced. “Pat…Lo…Ro.” And Vee...but Roey had only wanted him to say three.

“And are we causing you stress, Deceit? Being here?” Logan asked.

All movement from the others ceased and Dee couldn’t help but flinch again, his hand clutching tighter to Roman’s to keep him from pulling away. From leaving.

Pathetic.

Some Gatekeeper.

“Ye--na--n--ye-na” He couldn’t get either word out. He didn’t want them here, seeing him like this, but he didn’t exactly want them to leave either. He swallowed, throat burning as he turned his head to rest his scaled cheek against Vee’s hoodie, keeping his eyes squeezed shut as he dropped his other hand to Logey’s cooler one, wishing he had another arm to make sure Pat couldn’t leave either. “S-s-stay?” 

If you had more of a spine you could easily MAKE them stay with you. Just silence them. Take control. 

But he didn’t want to do that! He didn’t want to ruin the--the friendships he’d built with the others over the past year. 

“Aww, DeeDee.” Patton cooed, returning to rubbing small circles on his back. 

Dee flushed, ducking his head back against Virgil’s chest to hide how red his face must be.

And getting redder.

His breath caught, eyes nearly opening before he caught himself as Roman gently lifted Dee’s hand, pressing his lips to the back of it. “Of course, my young Prince. We’ll stay as long as you need us to. I promise.” 

Truth. 

The tightness in Dee’s chest faded, allowing him to draw air deeper into his lungs. They were going to stay. The Big Four wouldn’t leave him. Not even--not even---after--si--silencing--

“Four things you feel, Dee.” Virgil said, again running his fingers through Deceit’s hair, holding him close.

That was easier. He felt...he felt….surrounded. But in a good way. Everyone was there...for him. Wanting to help. He tightened his grip on Logey and Roey. “Pat--my back. Lo--leg. Ro...hand. You--ho-holding me.” 

“And when you’re ready, Deceit.” Logan rested his other hand on top of Dee’s. “Tell us, what are five things you can see?”

See? Dee squirmed, biting his lip.

Seeing would require opening his eyes.

Seeing would mean he--he’d see their faces. 

And that---that--

Some Gatekeeper.

Can’t even face your fears. 

Dee gritted his teeth, pulling his hands back to his chest, digging his fingers into the cloak Virgil had made for him. He could face them. HE COULD! 

Roey had said they wouldn’t leave.

Vee proved that, sticking around even after he’d been silenced, holding onto him without being forced to provide comfort. 

Looking at them shouldn’t change that. 

Until they find out what you did to Virgil. 

Until they remember you’re a DARK side. 

“It’s okay, DeeDee.” Pat said, reassuringly. 

Ro again stroked his cheek with his thumb. “We’re here for you.”

Are they?

Roey had promised.

Promises can be broken.

You know that.

“Bu-but---” Dee swallowed, eyelids fluttering as he leaned into Roman’s palm. “I--I just si-silenced--” 

The stroking stopped. “Silenced?”

“You used your ability?” Logan asked, the faintest of tremors to his voice as his hand twitched on Dee’s knee. “Up here?” 

“Kiddo, that’s not poss--” 

“It is.” 

Dee jerked at Vee’s steady voice, pulling free from Roman’s hand as his eyes flashed open to stare at the stormcloud on Virgil’s jacket. How coul--could he speak so calmly about being silenced! Dee could remember all too clearly the terror that had flashed across Anxiety’s face when his hands had slapped to his mouth. How the Shadows had sprung up in defense--

“But...How do you know?” Logan asked. 

Virgil shifted under him, shrugging one shoulder. “Dee silenced me, right before you guys showed up. Hands to the mouth and everything.”  

Patton made a soft noise of distress. “Nooooo.”

Here comes the rejection.

The hatred.

No one cares for Deceit. 

Dee curled up tighter, hiding as much as his burning face as he could. “Mm. sorry.” He mumbled. He didn’t want to be--be that sort of Deceit. The Bad Guy. He just wanted to...be himself...whatever himself was now--he didn’t know anymore.

Virgil dropped his hand from Dee’s hair to his hands, squeezing them. “It was--” He exhaled. “A shock for both of us. I wasn’t expecting it--I don’t think Dee was either...we--well I handled it...badly.”

Badly? Dee shook his head, looking up at Virgil frowning at the dark shadows under his eyes. Sure being attacked by the shadows hadn’t been fun. But he had been the one to stop listening to Vee when he said to stop. He was the one who pushed to continue trying to make him sound more like his adult self. “No.” 

Virigl raised an eyebrow. “No?” 

He nodded, eyes flickering to the other three as they shifted closer to him so they could see his face. “No. Not just you--I was...I pushed, I was--was--b-bad.” His bottom lip trembled. He’d been so desperate to be his old self that he hadn’t considered the consequences of his actions, of what he was asking. “And you just help and help and help some more, not...hate me.” He pulled one hand free from its place under Virgil’s and raised it--only semi surprised that Anxiety didn’t flinch at his movement, to rest his hand on his cheek. “You handle it good.”

Virgil had remained the level-headed one, working to comfort him despite his own distress while Dee---He was the one who’d---well...had a meltdown. 

Like the useless child you are. 

Some Gatekeeper. 

“So...I can assume.” Logan said, tilting his head. “That from the context given...Dee’s state of panic we found him in was from the...this...silencing that took place?” He asked, his fingers moving to tap in the four, seven, eight pattern again. 

“A silencing that shouldn’t have happened.” Roman mused, his eyes darting between Dee and Vee. “I mean--we proved his powers didn’t work on us months ago, Specs. That they only work while he’s in the subconscious with the Others.” 

Virgil shifted, though his hold remained steady on Dee as he drew in a breath. “I could be wrong, but I think….it’s because I began thinking of him as Deceit instead of Dilyn after I found him out here dressed in his old clothes.”

Huh? Dee looked down at his outfit--well the one Vee had made for him. The one that made him feel like himself for the first time in a long time. But that--how could--a change of clothes gave him his ability to silence back? That hardly made any sens--

“Of course!” Logan abruptly leaned forward, intently studying Dee’s clothes. “I can--Why did we not consider!?” 

Roman frowned. “Consider, Specs? Care to clue the rest of us in?”

Logan sat back, clearing his throat as he adjusted his tie. “We’ve all been concerned that Deceit’s stayed small far longer than the rest of us ever have...and with this new info.” He adjusted his glasses, the lens flashing in the faint light. “His unchanging state may be our fault.”

Deceit blinked, twisting to see Logan. Come again? Their fault? The Big Four had done nothing but help him for the past year! Keeping him safe and protected and his little state secret from the Others in the subconscious.

Patton made a noise in the back of his throat, fiddling with the edge of his hoodie as his hand paused on Dee’s back. “Our fault?” 

“Just think of it.” Logan gestured to all of them. “What did Roman say when he set the parameters for Deceit’s role as Dilyn a year ago?” 

Ro straightened, gesturing vaguely around the balcony. “Well, I said that he’s just a child in the mindscape. That he doesn’t have any particular funct--” He jerked. “Great Odin’s Eyepatch!” Roman turned to Logan. He jabbed his finger in the air. “No function. That’s what you’re getting at. We made Deceit--”  

Logan nodded. “Exactly. If Dilyn’s ‘role’ is to be a child and that he has no function in the mindscape, then there is no reason for him to grow or return to normal. Hence why Deceit--has remained how he is.”

“We didn’t let him be himself.” Patton whispered, pulling his hand back to grab onto the sleeves of his cat sweater. “In trying to make our lives easier while he was with us--we refused to let Deceit be himself.”

Truth. 

Dee sat up in Virgil’s arms, eyes wide. The solution--it was--could it really be that simple? Had they really prevented him from growing the entire time by--by having him take on this role?! 

“Kinda my thoughts.” Virgil mumbled, fidgeting in place. “Hence why I--I gave him a version of his outfit back. To help him...feel more like Deceit.” 

Deceit will rise. 

“So to fix this--” Roman snapped his fingers, grinning wide. “We just need to start treating you like Deceit again.” 

Dee stiffened, breath catching his throat. “Just like before?” He asked, hating how his voice trembled.

Back to being the Bad Guy.

“NO.” Virgil wrapped his arms protectively around Dee as he shook his head. “I mean...Yes to you being Deceit again, Dee. But No to just like before. I mean...we can’t--we need to--”

“Accept him?” Patton asked, tilting his head, eyes shimmering in the faint light. “All of him. Like we did for you?”

“Exactly.” 

Was it really that easy? Dee looked between all of them. Were they really wanting him to be...Deceit? “But--” He ducked his head. “I’ll be...bad again.” 

“Falsehood.” Logan said, gently lifting Dee’s chin back up to meet his eyes. “Overall Thomas is a good person, which means that you are too….there is no need to return to exactly how things were before in order for you to function for Thomas.”

“It would be silly to act like nothing’s changed between us.” Patton said, bouncing in place. “I mean...DeeDee can make cookies with me just as easily as Dilio did, even when you’re back to being an adult! We can still be FamILY.”

Family. 

The word had his stomach fluttering as chills rushed down his spine. Family. 

It was strange how---how desperately Dee wanted that word to apply to him too. To be included. To be wanted. To be part of a group. Part of the Family.

“It’s just a matter of figuring out what you want, Dee.” Virgil said, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards. “You don’t have to be stagnant. I mean...I changed. You can too. Be whoever you want to be.”

“Of course. Which means to potentially help Deceit return to normal--” Logan took Dee’s hand, his own giving the slightest of tremors as he raised it to his mouth, maintaining eye contact as he did so. “When you are ready.” He said, a faint shimmer of fear flashing across his eyes as his breath ghosted over Dee’s finger tips. “You can silence me as per your duties as Self Preservation to keep Thomas safe, I will not hate you for doing so.”

Dee caught his breath, eyes going wide. He...he wouldn’t? Hate...him?

“Same here, Jekyll and Lied.” Roman said placing his hand over Logan’s, giving a seated bow to Dee. “Silence me as you will. I won’t hate you either for doing your job.”

“Me too!” Patton agreed with a tremulous smile, adding his hand to the others. 

“You already silenced me--but yah.” Virgil shrugged, placing his hand on top. “You can do it again, I guess.” 

Dee--Deceit lifted his blurry eyes from their hands, heart pounding in his chest hard enough he wouldn’t be surprised if it burst. “You’re...you’re sure?” He whispered.

It had been so long...so very long since he’d attempted to use his powers on them. Attempted to be...Deceit. He didn’t--want to hurt them. He didn’t even know if he could anymore...but the knowledge that they were willing to let him...meant a lot. 

They nodded, even Virgil tilted his head the barest of degrees.

“If we can be ourselves around you, Deceit.” Logan said. 

“Then there is no need for you to pretend any longer to be someone else for us.” Roman finished, giving him a wink. “We’ll work it out.”

“Cus that’s what FamILY does!” Patton said, tousling his hair. “Even though you look like a kid, we’ll do our best to treat you like an adult from here out. It will be our New Year’s Goal! Okay, DeeDee?” 

Deceit will rise. 

It wasn’t--wasn’t how he originally wanted to return--but this...this could work. To help him get back to normal. To be...Deceit again. 

Dee drew in a steadying breath, nodding. A new year. A new him. Hopefully working with the Big Four instead of against them.

“Five things I see.” He said softly, meeting everyone’s eyes as his small hand warmed in theirs. “Me with my Family.”

End.

Taglist in Reblog

#White Lies #stillebesat #Sanders Sides #Deceit #Virgil #Logan #Roman #Patton #Tiny!Deceit #Anxiety #Logic #Creativity #Morality #negative self talk tw #panic attacks tw #anxiety attacks tw #manipulation talk tw

[jiminrings]

hi so i saw that you're okay with writing blurbs (totally fine if you're not up to it tho) i just wanted to ask about the homebound au, you mention that jimin has a tough love relationship with y/n so can you elaborate more on that?? like how their relationship is? tysm and i love ur writings :((

homebound: tough love

pairing: best friend!jimin x y/n

glimpse: jimin has a tough love relationship with pit stop crew!y/n, and you’re very determined to get him to smile :D

wordcount: 3k

notes: thank u so much baby!!! ur cute and i love you

this is an in-depth take of jimin and y/n’s friendship from homebound, the racer!yoongi fic and in there originally jimin is sO annoyed by u hehe but there iS this piece as his redemption arc // gif isn’t mine!!

in your very humble opinion

first impressions in first days in literally EVERY setting possible last for a lifetime

yeah sure time and influence would change these relationships built on first days bUt of course they matter!!!!

that would be the first memory someone’s ever gonna have of you and that shit’s crazy if u really think about it

you didn’t really pay mind to first impressions at first because you really thought that it’s whatever the other person makes of you,,, for being yourself

but then jungkook happened

and then sUDDENLY YOU BECOME MORE COMPETITIVE THAN YOU’VE EVER BEEN IN YOUR WHOLE LIFE

it’s both your first day for work but for different teams and the two of you could still be up on each other’s throats buT it’s just via text

update: jungkook bought FOUR boxes of donuts all in different flavors and that’s just for his fellow crew members

for his crew chief, he deadass bought him a dozen for himself AND jungkook even made a crepe cake for the guy!! from SCRATCH

for jung hoseok the racer? tiny cups of ice cream cake packed in a little cOOLER he specifically bought for this reason alone

even sent pictures of those two large bags with him that he’s gripping in one hand alone....

your heart warms that oH look a selfie that a smiling koo sent AAAAAAAND he’s flipping me off :))

no worries tho you came fully prepared

you’ve baked red velvet crinkle cookies!! just two of em stacked and in the middle is cream cheese icing that tastes sO heavenly

although only 1/4 of them you did yourself because they looked like they were the only good ones from the two batches you’ve made hehe

the rest of those you just ordered and gODDAMN were they v delectable and scrumptious

now min yoongi the racer couldn’t be here for the first day because uh from what you’ve heard, he’s uh somehwere in malta with his girlfriend and the flights out of malta are cANCELLED aha

that just means you have to pour your all to your crew chief

a separate box of red velvet crinkles

AND THEN

get this

a large tupperware you had to buy,,

filled with different types of pstries and bREAD

cream puffs and pretzels and blueberry muffins then buttered croissants and basically everything else that u could check out with a reasonable expiry date

a little sticky note right in the muddle

“let’s get this bread :D”

bread meaning dubs and dubs meaning wins aHa get it?? get it?? do u get it

you’re really aiming to give it to mr. park jimin himself

you’ve actually never met him but you heard his name a handful when you were still a trainee

park jimin sounds so much of a dignified name it’s absolutely intimidating

much more so when you’re knocking at his door and there’s a gentle hum from inside the door and you’re so nervous to differentiate whether that was a signal for you to come in or dON’T

spoiler alert: you came in at what you assume is the middle of the call your crew chief was making and oh-

oH HE’S A FINE CREW CHIEF ALRIGHT

he’s young!! even looks like he’s just in the same age as you are and you can’t really tel because WOW

you honestly thought mr. park jimin was just an old sack of rice or something

like maybe even fermented rice wine old

you didn’t knOw mr. park jimin is THIS

ok jimin’s peeved because uh that him clearly meant no but also curious at the same time because who r u

he was in the middle of a call with yoongi who’s called him in his office phone which is why he’s sped all the way here, hence why you haven’t seen him in the gathering downstairs

he also acts as yoongi’s manager besides being his crew chief and he’s unknowingly fit into the position

it’s like when a professor groups you and there’s no assigned leader but eVERYONE knows who the leader is even if so

now he’s kinda in the middle of berating yoongi because he should’ve came home tWO days ago but he wanted to extend alright and now look who won’t be coming home for another three days :D

suddenly the door bursts open and he sees an unfamiliar face peeking through and???

“.... can i help you?”

oH RIGHT INTRODUCTIONS!!

“mr. park!! oR should i call you jimin?? should i call you doc like from cars the movie because i thOught that’s what usually happens???”

who are you

who ARE you

you’re so nervous that you went down the cars movie spiel and that’s jUNGKOOK’S move and maybe you’ve been spending too much time with him that you’re morphing into one person

of all the traits you could absorb it really had to be the nervous cars talk :(((

“i’m y/n y/l/n, a crew member!! i was recruited to be a trainee back in uni and i went straight to here and i heard sO much about you-“

..... hmmmmm

either you really did hear about jimin and his name makes up for some news

or you’re a liar

if he’s being frank, jimin’s only started out as crew chief like a year and a half ago

yes he knows he’s young!!!

much more young compared to the stereotypical balding crew chief with the mustache and the sun spots

there’s still some talk on to how he shouldn’t be crew chief at all because he doesn’t have like 100 years of experience like these dinosaurs do bUT HE KNOWS HE’S STILL QUALIFIED

he may be not as experienced but he knows the math!!! he knows the logistics and he knows the statistics

jimin’s smart and agile and he knOws he could handle being a crew chief!!! yeah although yoongi himself is like two years older than him and bossing him is hilarious at times lol

“-and i just wanted to give you this!! y’know... for the official start of my career and a little goodie bag!!!”

he knows what you’re doing

first impressions amirite

he doesn’t care for this shit at aLL because if he may brag.,., people are immediately whipped for him and all he needs to do is smile to their direction

that’s it

oh you’re kinda embarrassing yourself in his opinion lmao but ok

“oh. i usually find red velvet too sweet.”

cool cool

now you get that not everyone is as passive-aggressive as yOU are and how you’d much rather wait to let that person pass before you talk shit

but jimin is really straightforward as you could tell

“it’s okay because there’s bREAD!!”

who doesn’t like bread :))

not uNLESS jimin hates bread or is allergic to eat it because then that means you officially have butchered your first impression

“... huh... whole container.. filled with bread...”

he’s not even feigning his expression

he looks severely underwhelmed and you wanna suck it up because if you’re gonna look tragically displeased with me boss ATLEAST do it behind my back :(((

anyways jimin stands up from his seat and outsretches his hand and that’s your cue to shake it and then leave

one problem though,,,

you see you’re wearing some rings

and he’s wearing some long-sleeves

and you are gracefully unaware that there’s a loose thread by the cuff of it and jimin over here is sporting sweater paws.,..,.

the handshake’s over but yOUR RING IN HIS CUFF ISN’T

“oH i’m so sorry sir let me just-“

you’re tugging your hand off aND FUCK

“no y/n i’ll just-“

jimin tries to be the one to pluck it out from your ring that’s stuck but that’s too late for it now

bECAUSE THE THREAD’S ALREADY BUNCHED UP

and it’s now bunched up and when loosened :))) the thread’s already ran :))) and is very visible on jimin’s slightly expensive shirt :)))

yours and jimin’s dynamic...

it’s uh

it’s unlike no other

literally

jimin is repulsed by you

he finds that you irk him very easily and you don’t know wHY jimin finds you to be in his nerves when you literally do nothing to him

he joins in the team drills to boost morale and let the crew know that not only is he the one heading it, but he’s also with you along the way

“do you want ice cubes in your drink?”

jimin’s sunglasses are perched up just nicely on his nosebridge as he sips on his water that came from the jug

honestly the weather is just sO humid and slightly iced water just won’t cut it

“yeah sure”

he outstretches his hand for you to take the cup and put ice in it but you dON’T

you don’t take it away from him!!!!

instead

jimin sees you plopping down a handful of ice cubes in his cup with your bARE hands

b-buy you’re holding the cooler there mUST be some tongs in there

WHY DID YOU DO THAT

“they r clean and besides!! friends do that!!”

“who told you that we’re friends?”

he is the one who halts all your plans

“stop snacking” is his signature line for u whenever you’re by the pit

and yoongi isn’t even near the box yet wHY can you not snack???

you can’t even protesy because jimin already has his palm open so he coulf confiscate the gummy bears with the promise that “yea sure i’ll give you them when the race is over hmmmm yea”

of course he isn’t gonna stuff it in his pocket

he just plops them down on the table and when you ask him for them????

they’re all hot and melty and disgusting because they were accidentally left in the sun to disintegrate

“do you want some coffee?”

WHAT’S WITH YOU AND SHARING YOUR FOOD

and then he met jungkook

he’s a bit of a brat but eh jimin finds him more tolerable than you

you’re all done with the workout and your trainer sehun is just sO unforgiving like would another eight second break hurt????

you’re kind of passed out by the bench and so is everyone

“i didn’t have any kids ask me for a picture today :((“

typically after the race some people would ask for your photograph!! along with the other pit stop crew members and they just make your day!!!

yoongi isn’t the only superstaer here ok :((

“well maybe if you did your joob good, they’d actually want to be in the same frame as you are.”

jimin snorts in reply without skipping a beat and ahhhh everyone knows the two of you are gonna start fighting again

one

two

usually you just roll your eyes but-

“jimin i don’t kNOW what i ever did to you for you to hate me so much and i’ve literally done nothing but to try and be kind and patient with you!!!”

oh they’re just gonna leave collectively now

“i already know you find me insufferable you dON’T have to rub it in my face every single time.”

you just combusted actually

you’re so over with jimin treating you like a loose thread on his shirt and he discards you every TIME like so

you can’t catch a break and it’s as if you’ve never done anythint good for him ever in your whole career

you don’t make conversation with him not unless it’s for work

you don’t offer him your food

you don’t throw him a smile

he bought a box of red velvet crinkles but then you didn’t even get a piece :((

jimin is shitty at apologies and the guilt’s been eating up at him because yeah he admits that he’s crossed a line there

MULTIPLE TIMES

and most of the times it’s always intentional so that’s even more guilt-tripling

then THE incident happened

and you left

he felt the most apologetic and shitty for that because gOD you’re just so good to everyone and to especially him!!!

he’s treated you so badly and you don’t waver for a single second because up until the last minute, you were still adjusting for him!!!

you were still considering his possible promotion and him in general when he knows to himself that you could’ve easily pinned the blame on him

but you didn’t

you covered for jimin and didn’t want him to be jeopardized by yoongi’s outrage.

“i’m sorry for being an asshole to you all the time.”

the moment the season ended, he’s immediately made his way to kim kradle to apologize to you

again and again

again and again until he wore himself out and cried and you had to stop him sternly just to assure him that you’re not angry at him

he looks out for you in his own ways

jimin’s not very vocal nor showy on how thankful he is to have you as a friend

it’s to when you order a chocolate chip smoothie and then the barista gives you a matcha one and you aBSOLUTELY hate matcha

and u already paid and you don’t want to cause a scene or anything like that

“i thought you hated matcha?”

jimin’s confused because since when did you develop a love for this green thing you’ve vividly described as soggy grass after a rainstorm that tastes like soil and phlegm

“oh i sTILL do!! lmao the barista got it wrong but it’s ok i’ll-“

“absolutely not.”

and then jimin’s immediately taking your cup and the receipt on the table and he’s gOING for the counter and won’t back down even if you’re tugging at his sleeve

not only was your order replaced, you ALSO got a complimentary cookie as the manager’s apology because whew jimin could be scary

it’s when you’re cooking lunch at kim kradle and u are mighty afraid of oil splashes because who wouldn’t????

jimin would nudge you to the side and he’d wordlessly take over for you

you would fall asleep on the floor and he’d prop a pillow underneath your head quietly

if he’s in the mood he’d give you another one underneath your arms

he may call for yoongi to carry you to the couch but ok fine he carried you one time and he’ll never speak of it

he’d let you believe that a ghost carried you there or something

sometimes jimin is just his usual grumpy self and he’s always been that wat

it’s tough love

jimin really drove to kim kradle at 7 in the evening which is out of his way and out of schedule because he should’ve done this errand at the opposite part of the city,,,

but here he is

with some fever medicine and a blanket from your place (he has a spare key) because you’ve been feeling homesick with all the back and forth from kim kradle and yoongi’s place :((

“thanks, minnie. lol if only i don’t love you platonically and u weren’t an asshole to me, you would’ve tOTALLY be my boyfriend rn”

ahem

yoongi would like to make it known that HE IS HERE

he IS the boyfriend

“you guys know that i’m-“

“totally. if only i didn’t find u annoying and a bitch, we could be married right now!!”

yoongi just wants to-

jungkook pats yoongi’s head in amusement

lol he too is a lil jealous because yOU’RE his best friend but anyways

“let them be, yoongs.”

aish he’s right

it’s heartwarming to see

jimin’s only warm to a couple of people and that’s including yoongi

he’s not the most open nor affectionate person in the world but he’s trying ok and that’s good enough!!!

“i TOTALLY would’ve been the godfather to their child though lmaooo”

jungkook snickers for a side comment that’s too LOUD and he’s only half-joking if he’s being honest and-

uHHhH

quick question

is that a flying wRENCH

#tHANK U FOR THIS REQUEST BABIE WE’D LOVE TO SEE JIMIN WARMING UP TO Y/N AND THEIR TOUGH LOVE #feedback pls and thank u :D #requested drabbles #jimin #park jimin #jimin imagine #jimin imagines #jimin drabble #jimin drabbles #jimin oneshot #jimin oneshots #jimin au #best friend!jimin #jimin angst #jimin angst imagine #jimin angst imagines #jimin fluff #homebound #jimin fic rec #jimin fic recs #park jimin imagine #park jimin imagines

[frighthouseofalighthouse]

I'm gonna do it. I'll take all the history asks for 500, Alex!

OKAy. I may have to reblog and do an add-on, because I will almost certainly go over the 250 paragraph limit. ALSO NICE JEOPARDY REFERNCE. Okay, ready? Go.

1: Historical role model?

We could all stand to be more like Julie D'Aubigny.

2: Favorite underrated historical figure?

See above.

3: Funniest historical kerfuffle?

In 1774 Boston's Committee of Safety (John and Samuel Adams as well as Joseph Warren and PaulRevere were on it) was made up almost entirely of patriots, except for one man: Daniel Leonard. They couldn't decide anything important with him around so they would have a fake meeting and then be like OKAY IT'S AUGUST WE'RE HOT AND TIRED, LET'S GO HOME, and then after he'd left they'd lock themselves in a room and have their REAL, TREASONOUS MEETING. Reading about this is objectively one of the funniest things I have ever heard. It's literally the beack house episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine where they have a fake party for Captain Holt.

4: Favorite conspiracy theory revolving around history?

Whatever the fuck the real story of the X FIles was (I've watched the whole thing multiple times and I still don't know what exactly what the point was. DOn't get me wrong I love it. It just makes no sense.)

5: Favorite political scandal to examine?

The XYZ Affair because I was there for it all and it's...a lot

6: Opinion on the presidential assassinations and their impact on America?

I answered this in depth last time I got that question and you can read my response here.

7: Which time period would you like to live in?

Either take me back to the revolution or put me in Victorian England (BARRING MEDICAL NONSENSE AND SOCIAL BARRIERS)

6 (again?!): Favorite historical fiction book?

See the assassination link!

8: Favorite tv show based on historical events, but not really faithful to real life?

Top choices are Outlander, TURN: Washington's Spies, Black Sails, and Ripper Street.

9: Favorite musical based on history?

*sarcasm* Definitely NOT Hamilton whaaaaaaat why would you even assume that?! Ahem. Also Les Mis is cool I guess.

10: Favorite movie based on history?

Wonder Woman!!!

11: Favorite biography?

The Swamp Fox by John Oller

12: If you could prevent one tragedy, which would you choose?

The Trump Administration.

13: Fun fact?

MLK and Anne Frank were born in the same year.

14: Favorite female monarch?

Cleopatra or Mary Queen of Scots.

15: Favorite war leader?

I'm biased but George Washington.

16: Favorite controversial leader?

Winston Churchill

17: Favorite feminist pioneer?

J U L I E D ' A U B I G N Y. Also Mary Read and ANne Bonney my queer pirate gals

18: Which president, in your opinion, was the best speaker?

No contest, Abraham Lincoln.

19: If you would travel back in time and kill anyone, who would it be?

Listen I’m not a fan of these questions when people are like “I’d kill Hitler” etc. bc butterfly effect, BUT The British officer who shot John Laurens can CATCH THESE MF HANDS

20: Opinion on each of the founding fathers?

Oh boy. This is an interesting question at this point in time because I am currently grappling with the fact that the people I worked with did not really believe in equality for all, and the system we built was designed to reflect this. However, it is a system that I believed in and put my everything towards so I have many conflicted feelings toward it rn. Anyway here's the low-down on the major ones. GEORGE WASHINGTON: Good guy, needed to loosen up and not be a slaveholder. JOHN ADAMS: old stinky man. Called me mushroom excrement once. Put him back in the swamp from whence he came. THOMAS JEFFERSON: Rapist. Slaveholder. Really stuffy. Founded an entire political party for People Who Don't Like Hamilton. Fuck him foreverrrr. JAMES MADISON: Friendly with me but betrayed me when Jefferson came back from France. 2/10, cute but do not trust him with your secrets or coffee order. JAMES MONROE: A teenager during the war and I barely ever saw him after that but he was fine ig. ALEXANDER HAMILTON: that me! Made mistakes but all around a cool(tm) guy. BENJAMIN FRANKLIN: fresh funky and really funny. Cooler than you'd expect an old man with gout to be.

21: Which leader do you think would make the best spouse?

No leaders are good spouses bc superiority complex.

22: Most pointless war in your opinion?

All. But King Phillip's War was especially whack.

23: John Wilkes Booth - crazy or crazy with a cause?

I mean of course he had a cause, but it was a bad one and having a cause doesn't make him less crazy. He was...really yikes.

24: Why do you think Lee Harvey Oswald killed JFK and did he act alone?

Most certainly did not act alone. But I feel based on timeline of events and maps of the area that either he was paid off either by our own government or the Soviets, or one of the two set him up as a patsy. Then Jack Ruby was paid to cover up the tracks.

25: Opinion on assassinations of leaders in general?

Same as killing anyone else, I guess, murder is bad, and I don't think that's really the route that should be taken to remove dangerous parties from power. But in some cases it may be the only way of removing them, and, well, that is what it is.

26: Do you think we're going to repeat history because we haven't learned from it?

Always. It is constantly happening. There is nothing new.

27: Have you ever been teased for being a history nerd?

hahahahahahahahaha yeah. Ever since first grade.

28: Which historical figure do you think has been subject to the most fictionalization and elevated to a godlike status nowadays?

Due to the musical, Alexander Hamilton (me.) People need to realize that I wasn't perfect but also not evil. Just human.

29: Rant about your favorite topic?

See the other part of my Lincoln Assassination rant here

30: Favorite kids/teens history books?

The Dear America series and the Liberty's Kids novelizations are WHERE ITS AT.

31: How was your interest in history started?

I don't even know exactly when or how anymore. My mom's a book nerd and an archaeology/anthropology major, so I grew up in a house chock full of books, including history books. I've loved it ever since I could read, honestly.

32: Do you know a history professor?

I do not!

33: How did your favorite history teacher structure their class?

I was homeschooled so it was my mom. She made sure we covered every period, but other than that just let me pick out what interested me and what I wanted to read and explore. She read a ton of big historical books right alongside me and we'd discuss as we read. We still do this!

AND THAT'S THE HALFWAY POINT OF THESE. I HAVE TO GET READY FOR AN OVERNIGHT SHIFT AT WORK SOON SO I WILL LEAVE THIS HERE FOR NOW AND REBLOG WITH THE REST OF THEM UPDATED TOMORROW. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

#a series of essays anonymously published #history asks

[clownkiwi]

hehe, so since im in a video game mood rn and thinking a lot about old video games/video games i love, if you were to ask me “hey ruby!!! what games/sequels/trilogies would you like to see remade???” well, here’s which ones i think should get remade: (this’ll be a pretty long post, so you can just click the link down below if ya want to read the whole thing)

out of any old final fantasy game that should get a remake like the final fantasy 7 remake, if i had to choose one, it would have to be final fantasy 6. that’s just one of my favorite final fantasy games (right up there with final fantasy 7, that is), and like. final fantasy 6 is kind of the perfect bridging gateway game between the fantasy/medieval/middle earth early final fantasy games (from 1-5) to the futuristic/modern/grounded to earth final fantasy games (7, 8, 10, 13 & 15), so like. realistically??? final fantasy 6 is probably one of the only few games i think should get a final fantasy 7 remake-esque remake, and it is one that i think can work in that realistic style compared to something like. final fantasy 9 or final fantasy 4, ngl

super mario rpg, obviously, id love to see that game get a remake. maybe with like, a lot more characters (luigi & wario would work perfectly in there), any content they had to cut out, maybe add more to the game that we didn’t even think of that could work (like, not just story padding, maybe stuff like the koopalings, daisy, wart from mario 2). idk, id just like a super mario rpg remake done in a similar style to the link’s awakening switch remake

despite how important these games are to mario’s history as they are the first original handheld mario platformers, as well as introducing wario, another important mario character, it’s kinda weird how nintendo hasn’t really paid much attention to the super mario land trilogy, or even the wario land series. and while i think a new wario land game will certainly get everybody (myself included) very excited, id also get excited if the original mario land series got an all stars-esque remake. heck, id get excited if all the wario land games got remade too in their own package (like, the mario land trilogy will just have mario land 1, 2 & 3, while the wario land remakes can either start out with mario land 3, or virtual boy wario land, or even wario land 2)

i think the original paper mario trilogy of the 2000s should get their own remake/upscaled ports to the switch as well. stuff like paper mario 64 should obviously get remade from the ground up, while stuff like the thousand year door & super paper mario should get like. upscaled graphics, or even new content (like in the thousand year door, there should be a whole sidequest or extra campaign dedicated to luigi’s own journeys that he goes on at the same time as mario’s, i think thatd b pretty neat & funny)

if any megaman game were to get a remake, i think they should be like. the original zero storyline megaman x games. like, ya know, megaman x1-5. and while ik games like megaman x1-3 already get a lot of love, and megaman x5 doesnt really get as much hatred (i think??? i never finished that game), i think megaman x4 should get a lot more love. not only is it my favorite megaman x game, but like. it has a pretty good storyline, each character gets their own unique story, and like. i just like a lot about megaman x4, i really do, and im sad it commonly gets referred to as the worst megaman x game just because of its voice acting. it gets a lot of flack for its voice acting, and honestly, if the voice acting was just mediocre or average, then i really think a lot more people will appreciate this game. like, in my eyes, if megaman x1-5 got remakes in the cel-shaded rendered style of megaman 11 or dragon ball fighterz, then thatd b cool. id also b down to a new megaman x game too aoisdjfiaos

ok, so, kirby games!!!! ik stuff like kirbys adventure & kirby’s super star got remakes, and while they’re great, id love to see more kirby games get remakes!!! and i got two seperate candidates that’d work. and that first one will be a remake of the “dark matter” trilogy of kirby games. games like kirby’s dream land 2, kirby’s dream land 3, & kirby 64. i think these games are pretty important in the kirby series as not only are these the first instance of the deep lore seen in later kirby games (stuff like return to dream land, planet robobot, and star allies), but like. dream land 2 was the first game to introduce kirbys animal allies, which have become staples for a lot of the kirby games (dream land 3, wow, thats all i could really think of oasidjfio). so like, yea!!! thatd b pretty epic

another kirby “trilogy” id love to see get remade or even get remasters of onto switch would have to be the “return to dream land” games. games like kirby’s return to dream land and even the 3ds games that were built off of that: kirby’s triple deluxe & kirby’s planet robobot. i mean, these games are fairly recent, and stuff like return to dream land isn’t even 10 years old yet. but like, i think if these games got upscaled graphics/models & resolution, as well as a bunch of new/cut content, it can also work

oooooooooooooooooo boy, there are a lot of sonic games id love to see get remade considering i think about sonic alot. stuff like sonic 3 & knuckles getting the sonic 1, 2 & cd treatment (get upgraded ports to ios & android, a bunch of new content from sonic mania, etc), as well as said sonic 1 & 2 mobile ports get released to steam or other consoles. itd be cool to see shadow the hedgehog get an upgraded port to the switch for a low price. maybe even see sonic x-treme get completed. but if theres any sonic game id love to see get a full on, worked from the ground up remake, it’d have to be the sonic dreamcast trilogy. and by that, i mean sonic games that were worked off of the same dreamcast technology/engine. games like sonic adventure 1, 2 & sonic heroes. and like, not just stuff like the gamecube or steam ports. i mean, full on remakes with updated models, updated animations & cutscenes, updated rendering, updated voice acting, updated everything!!! with that, id love to see the chao garden get a full blown overhaul, with more deeper chao breeding, more games to play with your chao, more special, unique chaos & even stuff like chao bonuses to the main campaigns. and even somethign that’d be cooler would be like. either free updates or DLC that would add more campaigns to these games with new characters (like the babylon rogues, the classic characters, silver & blaze, etc), and like. i KNOW thats a lot to work on, but like, i think a lot of people would appreciate that. plus, i consider the sonic adventure games would be a perfect introduction to the sonic series, i think these games could get a lot more people hooked onto the series!!! new & old fans alike!!! but, thats just my thots, and this would be impossible realistically. id still want it 2 happen tho 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

while ik everyone wants that gen iv remake, may i recommend a??? gen v remake??? pokemon black & white are still one of my favorite pokemon games, they were very close to me growing up, and i. just have so much goddamn appreciation and love for this game!!!! i think its one of game freaks more underappreciated games, and ik there a ton of people that can agree with me on that!!! it was just such a different and unique experience, with such a deep story, really good and underappreciated and underloved pokemon designs, and just. i’d love it if we really got a gen 5 remake, especially seeing how much game freak has been putting a lot more gen 5 nostalgia in all of their recent products (from a ton of gen 5 pokemon appearing in detective pikachu, to gen v pokemon getting galarian forms in pokemon sword & shield, and even gen v pokemon appearing in a lot more spin offs lately). like. trust me, pokemon black and white isn’t really as bad as people made it off to be in 2011. it really is a modern masterpiece in video games, i really recommend checking it out and begging game freak to give it a remake about as much as yinz have been begging game freak to remake diamond & pearl

obviously mario 64, sunshine, & galaxy 1 & 2 should get full on remakes. yinz know i wanted one this whole year, and im very disappointed we got these barely upgraded ports to switch instead. thats it on that, i dont need to go into further detail

ummmmmmmmmm, yea, thats kinda it. i cant think of any other games id love to see get remade. ummmmmmmm let me know what u think about this list, and tell me whatever type of other games you’d love to see get remade!!!

thats it ruby out

#ruby says sapphic shit #WOOOO BOY this was a big post to type out even tho it was just my thots #uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk how else to tag this so uh #mario #smb #megaman #sonic #ff #final fantasy #kirby #pokemon #i was gonna say sutte hakkun should get like a remake or even an english translated port to the switch #like the switch's online snes service thing. its p underrated & really unique n i think people might like it #ok thats it. thats abt as much as i talk abt video games for now. bc rn. i gotta watch a movie for school & do school work so uh #bye!!!! for now

[kaoarika]

I rarely do written posts in Tumblr anymore because I am still figuring out how this new UI works in general (and there might be still be some bugs about writing posts + leaving them on drafts + publishing them accidentally as well), and tbh, between the past two months have been sorta chaotic and very mentally draining (besides some work I have been doing) and me attempting to think around some of my few active fandoms... well, haven’t had an eureka moment where I sit and write what I think about stuff.

So, let’s talk about some “stuff”.

Some days ago, I accidentally noticed by PURE CHANCE that some of the completed webtoons I was going to “eventually read” in LINE were going to get “locked”/converted  for Daily Pass. I mean, tbf, I knew that they were going to stick to this plan since past October, but it seems they really went full force this month (they only “locked” like a couple of series back then). And it’s exactly how I thought they would do so - popular series that have been already completed, old and recent.

I’m not going to complain about “Daily Pass” because I do have some thoughts about that and the fact they could use another model than just readers farming/buying coins, but, what do you do, especially since lots of these series are PRETTY long (140+ chapters long)?

My complaint does come from that, as a web user, I found this by pure chance, despite them saying they would announce what series would be locked in a 30-day advance notice. Because there’s no apparent indicator in the main page about THIS (The only Notice/News detail you see down below the page is about Canvas creators). Heck, I don’t think they even tell you about it in their mail newsletter, which kinda suck :))).

So, anyway.

I checked and, yes, a couple of VERY old series I was interested in reading were/are going to get locked. Problem, like I mentioned? THEY are pretty long! I know I can binge read as much as I want, but I cannot make miracles like reading over 100 chapters (if one series, try thinking about 2 or 3 -  I WAS NOT GOING TO DO THIS) in less than 12 hours! ESPECIALLY if those series were going to get locked THIS WEEK.

FML.

...anyway crisis was averted when I had to let go some interesting series that I may would get my way to read them (if there is a new buying/rental model they would apply) in the future... BUT I did read stuff I was curious or wanted to read... and mainly old stuff that I was willing to eventually finish one day.

Opinions on those series?

Okay, as brief and spoiler free as possible:

Untouchable: A story about modern-day vampires that instead of drinking blood, they have evolved to absorb the energy of their preys. This one is a romantic series about Sia, a vampire model and this human guy who has a very deep microphobia, and she puts her eyes on him when she realizes that his energy is like none she has tasted before. But, again, dude has microphobia (that is more or less controlled as time goes on).

I stopped reading this one for a while because  I was sorta smelling love triangle from a jealous friend of hers that OBVIOUSLY didn’t want to be looked as “just a friend”, lol. Like “how would this get solved”, kind of thing in your typical romance stuff. But then, last week I retook it... and it wasn’t as bad... but it leaks typical shoujo stuff/problems that become a newer obstacle as time goes on and on (misscomunication, lack of trust, overprotective family ANNOYINGLY hurting their own offspring, sudden deux ex machina...?). So, I think it finished fine... But man, I was so pissed off in how some stuff was managed at the end, lmao. Especially the way a “villain” was redeemed? I know that they say “karma is a b*tch”, but, DUDE KILLED PEOPLE BEFORE!? and you redeem him in a “lol, you will find out how love will make you feel” LIKe, DUDE, WHAT THE HELL. DON’T REDEEM HIM LIKE THAT.

Ghost Wife: I started reading this series in an unofficial manner a long while ago, but I supposed that the first chapters are pretty slow and it didn’t catch me on in the first place. It’s about a girl that starts seeing ghosts/spirits, and there’s this one that becomes WAY too attached to her, that offers her two options: either been eaten/killed or agreeing to be his wife. Given the title of thise series, you might wonder she accepted the second one

My lesson? Should have kept reading. The story picks up when other ghostly creatures are introduced and they start interacting with the main female character and her “ghost husband”, especially since this ghost cannot really imitate human interaction and his solution is “hypnotizing” everyone so he can “normally” fit. And the interaction between those two becomes more gracious and natural. You can feel that she likes being with him, despite the dangers of attracting ghosts that might kill her and all that. Heh.

Other lesson I had is that: the artist isn’t EXACTLY well into action scenes and some other details (but their ghostly creatures’ designs are TERRIFYING), so, I thought “well, I know there are other artists like this in the webcomic/webtoon environment, I shouldnt be too worried about my art once I get done with mine, right?

Also, some details started to make sense later on. And I cried like a baby in some moments, as well. Don’t have too many complaints, though. Perhaps more obvious “falling in love” moments... but then I realized that some actions speak lots better than words.

About Death: And speaking of “crying like a baby”, this one. This is a very old work, and it’s a gem, and it’s short, to top! And HECK, the art was AMAZING. Very touchy, and it makes you think. There’s quite a lot of South Korean webtoons that have made me cry because... they really make you think a LOT about stuff... especially about life and death.

Oh! Holy: Story about a shy and lonely loveable dork that is in love of his childhood friend, and that they eventually find each other in high school. Said childhood friend is idolized in school (but she is... hmmm... a dork as, well). Oh, he sees ghosts. OH, and she dies within the first three chapters accidentally :3. Shenanigans happen.

I HAD A LOT OF FUN WITH THIS ONE. SURE, it’s another shoujo but WAY less dramatic than Untouchable, because this was comedy (so, a rom-com!). And this one made me want more and more to read it. The characters all had an amazing personality, chemistry and their interactions were FUN AS HELL. The author seems to have my my sense of (dumb) humor, and the art was too attractive and knew where it should bright.

I don’t think I have too many complaints about this one. I may have felt unsatisfied in some minor stuff, but everything else felt “okay” to me, in general. 

A couple of things, though: localization and some quality stuff relating to translation in this series. I cannot judge the translation, but I do think it could have handled more quality checking on this one or proofreading, I’m not sure. I know that these (licensed and translated) series come in a weekly basis, but they REALLY need to pay more $$$ to their own staff to not let this stuff happen THAT frequent.

Localization is a bit of an issue I do HAVE though, and it is the same as in “Ghost Wife” and some other recent Korean series they have licensed in the recent past: Why using English-localized names, though? SURE, they retain their original last Korean names... but... why don’t keep their FULL NAMES, I wonder? I mean, weren’t we supposed to be over that kind of stuff already (videogames, JPN anime, manga other foregin stuff)? Is it because marketability? And/or because some names are “puns” that couldn’t easily be translateable in other languages? 

If it’s the latter, I think the same is applied in other regional language localization, like, in Spanish, original English language “Axed” is called “Natacha la del Hacha” and you cannot wonder how it crawls over my skin. I know this series is BUILT ON and is full of puns (as I am following it)... but... “Axelia” is a much more cooler name than “Natacha”... :I or so I THINK? Don’t take me too seriously...

In “Ghost Wife” I get it, you have spiritual creatures... their “human” names are puns of what they really are, and these words MAYBE don’t have too much meaning in English or Spanish or whatever... but... its a bit... glaring... when the main cast has English first names... and then you have a side character called... I dunno, “Soyeon” :I. or Haetae (a creature that didn’t have a human character name...) or, heck, characters that never appear again like... there was this “Damien” dude that for some reason, his name is slipped a couple of times as “Suho” (I wonder, his original name). But, then, you have people named “Liz”, “Drake”, “Sarah”, “Nathan” ????

I suppose that in “Oh! Holy” that might be the case, too. The original Korean name of the series is “오!주예수여” that is translated as “Oh! Lord Jesus”, because Holy in Korean is named “Yesu”. And, *sigh* I think that says enough. The pun STILL works... but :’))

But at the same time, I think my thing with the English localized names in “Oh! Holy” is that they are... blatantly boring and I don’t think they fit their faces. At all. But, maybe that’s me? (I mean, the “ultimate” reaper is called Norman. NORMAN.) Like I said, they still keep their original Korean last names... but... ugh.

(this is coming from someone who gave two of her characters very not obvious Spanish names given that they are Mexican, but I do have some valid cultural and VERY obvious explanations about those...)

Also - I don’t get LINE Webtoon’s selectiveness in this localization decision. Some of the South Korean series they bring, they do KEEP their original full names (see “A Good Day to be a Dog”, “Ghost Teller”, heck, the afforementioned “Untouchable”), but then you have stuff like “Oh! Holy”, “Ghost Wife”, “Scorching Romance”, “Mom, I’m Sorry!” or “Lookism”... ?????

And, this is very blatant annoying because a) K-Pop is HUGELY global mainstream nowadays and you can hear/read fans screaming their NAMES?! And 2) K-dramas are also pretty popular these days??? 

?????? 

*LONG SIGH*

There’s a few series that I want to check out, but I still have some more days for that to happen (heck, even a bit of more than a week). But, it SURE DOES suck that most of the interesting series I had my eyes on all were going to get locked this WEEK. :))))

#kao's ramblings #kao's nonsenses #webtoons

[thismightbeaterribleidea]

FAQ

Hello! So, during a global pandemic and at the beginning of what will probably be a long and severe recession, at the age of 40 and with basically no knowledge of how automobiles work, I’m going to live in a van.

This might be a terrible idea. Hence, I’m calling my blog This Might Be A Terrible Idea.

If you’re reading this, I imagine it’s because you know me, so I’ll skip the introduction. I like a good FAQ, so let’s start there.

FAQ

Where are you going? Short answer: I don’t know!

Long answer: I’ll probably primarily split my time between Colorado/northern New Mexico, Maryland/Pennsylvania, and Florida. I want to stay as low-budget as I can and also avoid crowds during the pandemic. So whenever possible, I’ll opt for free, dispersed sites in national forests, state forests, BLM (which I now read as Black Lives Matter but here it’s the less-important acronym, Bureau of Land Management), state game lands, etc. I’ll pop into a developed campground every now and then to refill the water tanks, empty the portable toilet, and take a shower.

What kind of van do you have? In late June, I bought a 2007 Ford E250 with a high roof. In its first life, it was actually an Embassy Suites hotel shuttle, so when I got it, it had SO MANY SEATS. After it retired from the hotel biz, it went to a guy who owned a brewery and used the van for ski trips. Then he eventually traded it to a friend’s college-aged son in exchange for lawn-mowing work. This young man was actually going to make it into a camper too but didn’t have time, so he sold it to me.

I got the van for a very low price ($2000) because it’s really high mileage — almost 300,000. It also has a few issues: the dashboard, power windows, and radio only work sometimes. The doors are creaky and don’t like to close. There are splatters of paint (?) on the inside of the driver’s door. The air conditioning wasn’t working. And the interior is pretty beat up.

With help from my brother who actually knows about cars, I recharged the air conditioning. A new, functional instrument cluster is on the way. And the type of engine in this van (5.4L V8) supposedly has a reputation for being extremely durable. If I get a couple of good years out of this vehicle, I’ll be happy.

How are you going to afford this? A few years ago, I paid $4200 for an acre of land in the San Luis Valley, a few hours from Denver. I hoped to eventually put a little camper on it and make a very low-budget part-time home. But a few months after I bought the land, the county changed its rules to prohibit living in campers or mobile homes for more than a couple of weeks at a time. So the camper idea went out the window, and in June, I sold that land for $5000. This was my funding to buy the van and associated stuff. I’m going to try to keep the initial total cost of the van (vehicle, repairs, materials for the interior, solar installation) to about $6000.

I’m incredibly fortunate to be in a position where I don’t have to choose between my job and a weird nomadic lifestyle. About a year ago, I went full-time freelance as an editor and writer. So I’m self-employed and I work from home. I don’t even need the internet that much — aside from checking email, file downloads/uploads, and occasional googling for research and editing questions, I can be mostly offline. Also incredibly fortunate: the pandemic hasn’t affected my work, at least not so far.

I’ll have new and unexpected expenses: food will be more expensive, I’ll have to pay for campgrounds sometimes, the van will need gas and repairs and oil and new tires, and then I’ll want to make livability improvements (like insulation). But I hope that I’ll be able to cover all of that while still living within my means.

Aren’t you selling your condo? Why don’t you get a newer/lower mileage/already converted van? Yes, I am (fingers crossed that the sale goes through) selling my condo in Denver. But I also have no savings, no retirement fund, no emergency fund. And the recession is just getting started… the whole future seems pretty uncertain. I’d feel better if I kept as much of the condo money in the bank as possible, even if that means having a crappier van.

Don’t you worry about safety? Absolutely. I’m a worrying person. I worry a lot! But if I responded to those worries by not going anywhere alone, staying in only developed campgrounds, etc., then I’d have missed out on some of the best experiences in my life, and I’d never go much of anywhere at all.

To stay safe in a van, I’ll use the same approach I use for solo car camping. If a place feels sketchy, I go somewhere else. To avoid trouble from bears, I try not to get food on the ground, do food prep and brush teeth away from the vehicle, and keep the car doors locked when I’m away and at night. To avoid trouble from bros, I try to stay out of sight. I pick spots and set up my campsite so that people passing by mostly just see the vehicle and not me or my single chair or small tent. I have bear spray, which stays in arm’s reach when I’m out hiking and at night, and I have a sharp knife, which is always pretty accessible too.

In fact, safety is why I chose a van over a truck with a camper, which actually would have been preferable. If a truck ever had recurring or expensive mechanical problems, I could just get a new truck and put the camper on it — but with a van, I’ll either have to do the expensive repairs or get a new van and re-do the whole interior. And if I wanted to stay in one place for a while, I could take the camper off and just drive the truck around, saving on gas and wear and tear. But with a truck camper, if I were ever inside the camper and felt unsafe, I’d have to *go outside* and then get into the truck cab in order to leave. With a van, if things start feeling sketchy, I can just hop in the driver’s seat and go.

(Side note: It’s upsetting and frustrating to me that these safety concerns and choices are so linked to gender. Of course men also need to think about safety when they’re out camping alone, but I’m pretty sure I’ve had to think about it at least 200% as much as my equivalent 40-year-old non-threatening-looking out-of-shape single dude.)

If we’re talking about safety from non-sentient threats — bad weather, injuries, mechanical breakdowns, etc. — then I…

a) try not to get into situations that I can’t get out of — whether it’s a too-rugged road, a too-steep trail, or a spot that is likely to turn into a mud pit if it rains. I also think about whether I could walk to get help if I needed to. b) have some basic safety and first aid stuff. Tape, gauze, and a mylar blanket for me; jumper cables and a portable air compressor for the car. c) have a Triple A membership in case I need a tow.

The van came with a handy fire extinguisher strapped to the driver’s seat. To reduce the possibility of being unable to call for help if I get stuck somewhere, I eventually plan to get a cell phone signal booster.

The fire extinguisher or even my bear spray won’t keep me safe from COVID-19. But like I mentioned, I’m trying to stay as far away from crowds as possible. To cut down on contact when resupplying, I’ve got storage for 10 gallons of water (I’m actually going to expand this to 15) and plan to carry enough food for a month. Unless there’s a mechanical problem or breakdown (definitely my biggest concern), I should be able to drive coast to coast while remaining in a relatively firm bubble. The riskiest thing I’ll *have* to do is refuel at gas pumps, but I can pick gas stations that seem less crowded, refuel in smaller towns rather than busy highway rest areas, and go at quieter times of day.

Does your van have air conditioning? Nope! Well, it has the standard vehicle AC, but that only works while the van is running, and most of the time I’ll be parked. There are AC units that can go on top of campers and vans, but they use a ton of power: either you have to be plugged in to shore power at a campground, use a gas-powered generator, or have a million solar panels and batteries. I’m going to get a good roof vent and fan installed, plus maybe put some smaller battery-powered fans in the windows, so that will hopefully keep me from getting heatstroke in the summer.

Does it have running water? Nope! Right now, I have a portable foot-pump sink and a self-contained portable toilet. I plan to eventually build a nicer/bigger sink. I’m also going to order a collapsible tub so I can do sponge baths or use a solar shower (a black vinyl bag that heats up in the sun and has a hose attached). Swimming in freshwater lakes will need to become a bigger part of my life. I’ll probably be a little stinky at times, but people should be social distancing anyway, so if anyone can smell me, they’re way too close.

Does it have electricity? It will! I’m planning to have one large solar panel and a lithium battery installed. (For those who are curious, it’s a 315 watt solar panel with a 100 AH battery.) This will power the roof fan, my laptop, my phone, some plug-in lights, and eventually also built-in lights, the cell phone signal booster, and maybe a small fridge or cooler. The solar power system is going to outlast the van and will be easily switchable to my next vehicle.

Wait. “Maybe” a fridge? What are you going to eat? Ummm… I’ll figure it out? I eat like a scavenging raccoon, so I’m not too picky. I bought a bunch of freeze-dried legume-based soup and stew mixes from Harmony House, some high-protein shake mix from Huel, and I plan to stock rice, quinoa, peanut butter, oatmeal, hard cheese, packaged salmon and tuna, and dried fruit. If I’m driving, I’ll probably also keep an eye out for farm stands and grab some produce that will keep unrefrigerated for a few days. During the pandemic, I’ve been using support for local businesses as a way of justifying takeout or delivery once or twice a week, so I’ll probably keep doing that when I pass through developed areas.

Can you poop in your van? Does it smell? Yes to the first! I haven’t, um, tested it out yet. But after road trip in my sedan in May, when I had to go into a scary (no one wearing masks or social distancing) gas station in Colorado Springs, bathroom and hand-washing facilities for the van became a priority. Right now the portable toilet is just sort of hanging out in the open, but I’m going to build a plywood box to contain it. I did pee in it a bunch during my inaugural camping trip, and I’m happy to report that the chemicals I added to the tank made it not smell gross while also not producing an overwhelming chemical smell.

How will you get the internet? Unlimited data plan FTW! I recently figured out that I can use my phone as a mobile hotspot and connect to it with my laptop. It’s not fast, but it’ll do what I need it to. And I should be able to have connectivity even in more remote areas after I get a signal booster.

Won’t you get tired of living in a tiny space? Maybe. I do have some good practice, though. In the last decade, I’ve gone from living in a 700-square-foot condo (Denver) to a 400-ish-square-foot studio apartment (New Jersey; grad school) to my childhood room in my parents’ house (Maryland; post-grad-school student loan debt). Each time, I’ve gotten rid of stuff, even things it’s painful to get rid of: old books, childhood knickknacks, cassette tapes, drawings, horse show ribbons I remember winning, cutlery and glassware I got as housewarming gifts.

I also tend to feel really at home in my car. I’ve napped in my car, drafted novels in my car, had long and meaningful conversations in my car, had existential crises in my car, eaten hundreds of meals in my car. Car = house makes sense to me. And I hope to be staying in places where I have access to big and engaging outdoor spaces.

What will you do after you live in a van for a while? I have no idea. There are definitely things that I want to do — write fiction, build my career, be more involved with community/communities, get healthier, be a better human — but all of those things are geographically nonspecific. And everything both personally and nationally feels so up in the air. I could end up living in a van for a year, or five, or ten. I might eventually buy a house or a boat or a farm, or settle down somewhere (I don’t know where) in a more permanent way. But I’m not making plans for any of that, and I’m not making plans for an “after.”

I think that’s it for the FAQ! If you have any questions, let me know and I will address them in a later LFAQ (Less Frequently Asked Questions).

Also, please bear with me because I don’t really know how Tumblr works. If you want to start reading, start FROM THE BOTTOM.

[the-nagakenny-archives]

New to the Party Pt. 2

(OOC: First part can be found here ;v; Sorry this is so long OTL, hope it was worth the wait ;v;)

A few hours later, Samantha began to feel uneasy. It was getting dark; most of the party crowd had dissipated and gone home, but there were still quite a few people chatting around a rather elegant fire pit near the back patio. Kenny was among them, grinning brilliantly and laughing his throaty chuckling laugh, eyes sparkling with mirth. Samantha drifted over, eyes scanning for Michael, trying hard not to make eye contact with anyone else lest she be invited to come sit with everyone. 

To her chagrin, Kenny noticed her; his eyes lit up and he gestured to her enthusiastically. “Samantha! Come on over and join us! The fire’s warm and the company’s warmer!” This was following by a smattering of smiles and friendly affirming murmurs from everyone else. 

“Uh, heheh, actually,” Samantha replied, smiling awkwardly and brushing a lock of hair behind her ear, “I was, uhm, looking for Michael. Have you seen him, by any chance? We really need to, uh....get going.”

Kenny’s expression changed to mild surprise. Everyone else made disappointed noises and chimed in with more murmurs. “You’re not staying?” “Aw, how come?” “So soon?” “Oh, that’s too bad.” It made Samantha feel a little....odd. Part of her was surprised and kind of touched that people seemed disappointed that she was leaving, but another felt....well, like something strange was going on. 

“Are you feeling sort of funny about the after-party, hon?” a woman she didn’t recognize asked her. She had beautiful dark hair and a very expensive-looking silvery dress on.

“I’ll admit, I felt the same way about it the first time,” a dapper blonde young man piped up. “I was convinced it was some kind of weird rich-person thing you always hear rumors about, like an orgy or something. Uh, no offense, Mr. Huggins!” He quickly interjected with a laugh.

“Oh, none taken!” Kenny replied with a mischievous grin, taking a sip of his mineral water. “Those are strictly for holidays only.” 

There was an uproar of laughter at this. Even Samantha found herself biting back a little bit of a smile. “Heh, and uh, what about sacrificing a lowly intern to some kind of eldritch god to keep the fortune flowing?” she joked dryly. 

Kenny threw back his head and laughed heartily. “Oh good heavens no, you’re safe,” he said cheerfully. “I already picked Jerry for that, didn’t I Jerry?” He clapped the young man sitting next to him on the back, who rolled his eyes with good humor and gave an overly dramatic shrug of resignation. Samantha found herself giggling along with everyone else. She was starting to loosen up a little against her better judgement.

She caught sight of Michael loping out of the back door of the house, whistling. Either he had been to the bathroom or--more likely--he had been in there scrounging for left-overs. She felt the growing contentment give way to relief. Now there was no question about it, she could leave. 

“Ah, Michael!” Kenny said brightly as he came over. “Will you be joining us this evening?”

Samantha began to explain. “Oh, ah, he’s actually---”

“Yep! Sure am!” Michael interrupted with an enthusiastic nod.

Samantha looked at him in stunned silence, eyes wide. 

“Good! Wonderful!” Kenny said, clapping his hands together. “In that case, I think that’s everyone then. Let’s make our way inside!” 

The twenty or so people got up from their seats at the fire pit, chatting excitedly, and started heading for the back door. Michael noticed Samantha goggling at him angrily. “Come on, don’t be such a buzzkill,” he sighed. “This sounds like it’s going to be a fun time.”

“So what if I am?! I told you I wanted to go home!” Samantha hissed. She tried keeping her voice down so that no one would hear. 

“Sam, honestly, maybe this’ll do you some good,” Michael said, looking slightly miffed. “You’ve been acting really high-strung lately. Can’t you just loosen up a little?”

Kenny overheard them arguing; he gestured for everyone to go inside without him, and he ambled over to the two of them, hands in his pockets. “Everything okay?” he asked. 

Samantha felt a blush of embarrassment forming on her cheeks. This awkwardness was exactly the kind of thing she had been trying to avoid. “W-Well, Michael’s supposed to be my ride, so--”

“Oh! No problem! I’ll call a cab for you.” Kenny put his hands on their shoulders and started gently leading them both toward the house. “Michael, could you tell everyone I’ll be downstairs in a little while? I’m gonna keep Samantha company while she waits for her ride to get here.”  

“Oh no, please, that’s okay!” Now she was practically burning alive from the embarrassment. Why did this have to happen to her? Things had been going so well. Now her boss probably thought she was being a pain in the butt. 

“Nonsense! What kind of host would I be to make you hang around alone? This place can be kind of spooky at night, you know.” 

They entered through the back door into a hallway with beautiful dark wood floors, and he led them to a huge living room area. Samantha had never seen such pristine, comfortable-looking furniture in all her life. Kenny directed Michael to another hall, and he was soon out of sight. 

“B-But....really, I....” Samantha tried to stammer out another protest.

“Have a seat,” Kenny said, beaming at her, “and I’ll conjure up my cellular phone. Let me see, where did I leave that pesky thing?” Kenny gave his pockets a once-over, but was coming up empty-handed. 

Samantha sank onto one of the couches gloomily, but her mood was almost instantly forgotten by the absolute decadent comfort of her seat. “Ooooo,” she said, leaning farther back into its cushions, and then blushed as she realized she had uttered that aloud. 

“Comfy, huh?” Kenny grinned at her, stopping his search for his phone momentarily. “I’m of the opinion that comfort is a luxury everyone should be able to afford. That’s why I started my business.” 

“Huh, yeah?” It was a little hard for Samantha to concentrate; she was distracted by the marshmallow-y softness of the couch. Good lord, if she had a couch like this at home, she’d never leave. 

“Mmm-hmm. It’s a known fact that nowadays people aren’t sleeping well---stress, depression, too much work, too much technology. It’s making people sicker, sadder, and more apathetic. And I aim to change that.” He cocked his head as he looked at her, and Samantha noticed for the first time how strangely captivating his dark, warm eyes were. In fact, she unconsciously tilted her head to mimic him. “It’s part of why I throw these parties, too,” he said. His voice was soft, almost soothing. “Everyone has a nice time, and then they end the night with a nice sleep. All cuddled up, because cuddling is important, too. It lowers blood pressure, relieves stress, even helps pain. And the next day, they wake up feeling better than they have in a long time.” 

“Oh...wow. Is that a fact?” Samantha asked softly. She wondered if he was making that up. Then she tried to think of the last time she had had a good night’s sleep, and how it felt to wake up feeling refreshed and like resting had actually been productive. She couldn’t remember. 

He smiled gently at her. “Mmm-hmm. Helping people feel good is something I’ve always loved doing. So when I had this place built, I made sure there was at least one room where people could go for a leisurely escape. I’ve made the downstairs a perfect place to just lounge around and relax. The floor is cushioned, there’s a sunken level full of pillows and couches, and there’s plenty of room to snuggle up and just let the days and weeks of toil and hardship just melt away. Nothing but our dreams to take us to far, fantastic places, floating like bubbles on a warm summer breeze.” His grin broadened and his tone of voice changed back to its playful timbre. “But anyway, I’ve gabbed a bit too much, I think. I still need to call you a cab, don’t I?”

Samantha blinked, feeling bewildered. It was like a spell had been broken. “Ah, yeah.” She felt an actual pang of disappointment that surprised her. The part of her that wanted to leave was quiet now. Did she really want to go home and go to bed---her slightly lumpy, too firm bed---when she had an opportunity to sleep on a couch that was as comfortable as the one she was currently sitting on? And anyway, when was she ever going to have the chance to sleep over at a billionaire’s house again? Plus Michael and Dorothy would be there, so it wasn’t like she’d be surrounded by strangers. The cuddling thing was still kind of weird to her.....but maybe she could get around that somehow.

And there was Kenny, too. She hadn’t really encountered him too much at work, but talking with him at length like this made her realize there was something....magnetic about him that she’d never encountered in anyone else. A warm, inviting magnetism that radiated from him, like he was a living sun. That when he smiled, the world smiled with him. 

“Uh, you know....maybe I’ll, uhm....stay after all,” she said hesitantly.

“Hmm? Really?” Kenny’s eyes lit up with delight. “Well, that’s wonderful! In that case, come along with me.” He held out his hand to her. “I’ll take you there.” 

Samantha was reluctant to get up from the couch, and almost suggested she just sleep there instead, but curiosity got the better of her. She put her hand in his, and was helped gently to her feet. She found herself still wanting to hold his hand as they walked together to the hall Michael had disappeared down; his hand was soft and strong. She blushed, wondering if she was being improper, holding her boss’s hand like she was his high school sweetheart, but he didn’t seem to mind at all. 

They walked down a short flight of stairs to the lower level of the house; it was a few degrees cooler, pleasantly so, and smelled strongly of some kind of potpourri or incense that Samantha found incredibly nice. She thought she could detect vanilla and lavender. She couldn’t resist inhaling a deep breath of it. Kenny said nothing, but smiled at her as though he understood. 

They were soon in a small room with many cubby-holes integrated in the walls; one side housed people’s shoes and jackets, the other had neatly-folded fluffy white robes. Beyond the walls of cubby-holes was a door.

Kenny let go of her hand and began taking off his own shoes and socks, placing them into one of the cubbies. Samantha followed his example, though she kept her socks on; she didn’t know why, but she felt a bit odd being barefoot in a place like this, as though her feet would sully the floor. 

“Grab a robe and I’ll meet you inside,” Kenny told her with a wink. “Have to change just a bit before we start.” 

“O-Okay.” Samantha put on one of the robes and instantly fell in love with it; the material was like being swaddled by a cloud, and it smelled faintly of the vanilla and lavender that she had smelled before. Then she apprehensively opened the door and stepped through.

The room beyond was dimly lit by an ornate lantern hanging from the ceiling, casting a comfortable orange glow, but she could make out everyone gathered in the sunken living space in the middle, sitting on the couches and pillows and chatting softly with each other. She caught sight of Michael and Dorothy and walked over. The floor felt soft and plush under her feet, almost making her regret that she had opted to leave her socks on. 

“Samantha!” Dorothy piped up in surprise, her voice at a reasonable volume for a change. She got up and gave her a hug. “Changed your mind, huh? I’m so glad. C’mon, come sit by me an’ Michael!” She darted over to the couch and patted the seat between them, prompting everyone else to murmur words of encouragement. Michael was smiling at her smugly, as if to say “I told you so”; she decided to ignore that. She’d deal with him later. 

Samantha smiled awkwardly and drifted over, sitting down. “Uhm, so,” she said with a nervous laugh, “uh....what do we do now?” 

“Oh, nothing yet,” whispered the dark-haired girl from before. “We have to wait for Kenny first. He likes to say a few words before we begin.”

As if on cue, the door opened and Kenny stepped into the room, smiling serenely. Samantha thought her eyes were playing tricks on her thanks to the dim lighting, but her heart gave a jolt as she realized he was wearing nothing except one of the white robes they were all wearing; she could see part of his muscular chest peeking through the opening, and his bare calves as he walked over to them. She hoped like hell he wasn’t totally naked under there. She glanced over at Dorothy and could tell she was thinking the exact opposite from her facial expression. 

He ambled down the few steps into the sunken living space and stood in the middle of the floor, looking at them all. “My friends,” he said, “thank you all for coming.” His voice was now a smooth, crooning purr. Samantha felt her skin break out in tingly goosebumps; she’d never heard him sound like this before. “Today was a grand party indeed. Your stomachs are full, and your hearts are full. However, you know that you can’t truly enjoy a warm, snug cuddle and welcome a long, peaceful sleep when your minds are full.” 

Samantha frowned to herself, deeply puzzled. A glance over at Michael told her he was just as puzzled, but Dorothy was nodding, seemingly expectant. 

“For those of you who have been here before,” Kenny continued softly, “this will only take a moment.” 

He cleared his throat. The atmosphere seemed to change; everyone save Samantha and Michael appeared to be hanging on Kenny’s every word, breathlessly silent, waiting for something.

To Samantha’s surprise, he began to sing in a strangely hypnotic, rhyming cadence.

“A memory of colors left behind

You see them forming in your mind

Let them set your senses free

Your mind is clear at the count of three

One.....two......three.”

Samantha watched in stunned silence as the group seemed to sigh rapturously as one, as though a tremendous weight had been lifted from them at the same time, and slump back in their seats, eyes glazed over. There was something else about their eyes, she noticed as well---she leaned over to look at Dorothy, who was drooped on the couch in the same state, and.....were her eyes changing color? It was hard to tell---her eyelids were nearly shut---but she could swear that’s what they were doing. 

“They’re alright, don’t worry,” Kenny said kindly. “It’s just a lot easier for me this way. I do feel a little bad, it seems like cheating, in a way. But they don’t seem to mind it.” He chuckled.

“What the heck did you do?” Michael asked as he looked around at everyone, sounding a bit awestruck. “They.....they look like they’re in a trance.”

“Mmm, well, that’s because they are!” Kenny beamed at him with his charming, radiant smile. “You see, it’s very hard to fall asleep unless you’re in a completely relaxed state. This is without a doubt the most relaxed they’ll ever be.” He ambled closer to where they both sat; the two of them just watched, frozen in disbelief and astonishment. “They’re experiencing a residual trance though, brought about by a trigger I made specially for them. You two....since this is your first time, you get the real thing.” His eyes twinkled with a kind of ethereal mischief. “Aren’t you lucky?”

“I...wha...” Samantha struggled with her confusion for a moment. “What do you mean....the ‘real thing’?”

Kenny didn’t answer right away; instead he leaned down closer to them, his eyes never leaving their faces, and gently cupped a warm, soft hand against each of their cheeks. Samantha was still too stunned to move, though what she was feeling wasn’t necessarily fear; it was like a swarm of butterflies had been disturbed inside her, tickling her from the inside. She was glued to the spot like a deer in headlights. 

“I mean,” Kenny replied, his voice now a soft, purring whisper, “thissssssss.”

As they watched, looking into his face with curiosity and anticipation, his eyes slowly changed---they began to glow with an otherworldy light, accentuated by the mood lighting in the room, and change colors in a slow, repeating pattern of ripples. It was beautifully hypnotic; in fact, as soon as Samantha looked into his eyes, she was completely unable to tear her eyes away, and any thoughts of how it was even possible slowly stopped bothering her. She vaguely heard Michael gasp softly next to her, but she didn’t turn her head to look; the colors arrested her, dominating her vision. Her head started to feel warm and muzzy; a kind of pleasant sleepiness was washing over her as she watched the colors in their eternal undulations. 

“Relax-sssss, my darlings,” Kenny purred in a smooth, velvety voice. “Take deep, deep breathsssss. Let go of the weight of the world, and be at peace.”    

“Mmmmmmm....” Samantha hummed with deep satisfaction, her eyelids slowly drooping. At his words she could feel everything lifting from her like so many balloons, and it felt magnificent. She’d never felt this combination of good and empty before. She sank into Kenny’s touch, into the comfy softness of the couch where she sat, into the robe she was wearing. Michael had already deflated next to her, an expression of intense sleepiness and wonder stamped on his features. 

She felt something else caress against her face then. It wasn’t Kenny’s hand; that was still gently cupping her cheek. Kenny’s other hand was still against Michael’s cheek. Whatever it was brushed against her chin momentarily, warm and silky smooth, and she shuddered with pleasure. She couldn’t see what it was, however; she was still transfixed by the colors of his eyes. If she had looked, however, she would have seen it was a tail---a snake’s tail. 

Kenny smiled slyly. He was slowly rising off the floor, but neither Samantha or Michael seemed to notice or care---not even when it was clear he no longer had legs, and loops of huge, thick snake coils began to fill the space. The coils slithered and undulated smoothly around and in-between the others, who sighed and groaned in their trance with relief and bliss, snuggling themselves against the soft, silky muscle that surrounded them. Some of them were asleep in seconds. 

Samantha could feel the weight of the tail in her lap, wrapping around her body snugly, and she uttered a groan herself. It was like nothing she had ever felt before---an all encompassing hug, so warm and safe. She was so, so sleepy.....she wanted to lie down against the hugging coils and disappear into their embrace. 

Kenny drifted between her and Michael and settled himself on the couch, his huge serpentine body shifting and rippling with subtle power. Samantha and Michael immediately draped themselves into his scaly lap, loops of coils covering them, and let sleep claim them.

Kenny closed his eyes and sighed contentedly. He gave his coils a soft, flexing squeeze around each person, causing some to make soft noises of comfort, though most were too in the throes of sleep to react. Another successful party, he thought to himself. There was nothing quite like a beautiful sleep after good food with good friends.

They remained that way uninterrupted for the entirety of the night. Samantha wore a small, enchanted smile the entire time she slept. 

#ask-nagakenny #story post #gotham au #hypnosis #coils

[fenrirlives]

So after getting some feedback here and from some gacha folks on discord, the overall picture I’m seeing here is that people had a much larger problem with the way Minase wrote a lot of the servants and their interactions than the concept of Agartha in general. I also see alot of people base their dislike on the JP version, which I can’t really comment on because I don’t speak the language and I’m not a fan of basing opinions on possibly biased translations for or against the subject matter

tl;dr, I liked it a good deal! Hated the repetitive dialogue, but the blended fictional worlds, Megalos, and a bunch of other things were really to my liking! I view it as a cool singularity with a sloppy ending and sloppier dialogue. Not as good as Shinjuku, but leagues better than Septem, London, or Orleans on my chart.

also as far as villain servants go, Columbus goes in my “What a douche, I love em!” shelf of fame right next to Mebd and Teach. I mean look at this dude!

Truly Rider is best servant class in all respects! (also his artist is great go follow!)

Addressing the elephant in the room first, I was really confused at the whole misogyny complaints. I saw a few people who found the tyrants to be sexist in concept, while others took more issue with Fergus’ interaction with Scheherazade, or how Fergus as a character was treated overall. 

I don’t imagine there are THAT many people who see the kingdoms as the problem, as they never came off as a commentary on gender to begin with, and context shows that they wouldn’t even work as commentary since all aspects of them are either A) fabricated in regards to the non servants, or B) altered by Scheherazade’s Noble Phantasm in regards to actual servants. If anyone saw them as the writer’s take on gender roles, I think it’s unintended.

People taking umbrage with Fergus and Sche, I can understand a little more, as alot of that is a symptom of the repetitive dialogue that plagues this whole singularity. Fergus’ message near the end is one that I agree with (living in constant fear of death isn’t living at all, and using your trauma as an excuse to generalize or hurt other people is unacceptable), and I was a big fan of how the end of his quest to become a good king is realizing he’s just not meant to be one.

 The thing is, character arcs are carried by their dialogue, and having Fergy either repeat the same crap about training/not hitting women or break the pace of a scene to internally monologue about the philosophy of a kingdom really did no favors. I also wished that his revelation about there being strong women was something someone else told him instead of something he just randomly remembers when the time is convenient, because that makes his whole “younger self” aspect kind of meaningless outside of not letting him be playable. Medea and Medusa lily were far better examples of how one goes about writing these younger servants and their relation to the knowledge of their future selves.

 I think it would’ve worked better to use Adult Fergus instead, and have him show new levels of discomfort both with the situation in Argartha, and with his own behavior when first interacting with Sche (thereby betraying her expectations and reason for summoning him by actually being more thoughtful and reserved than she initially expected) . Maybe have him focus more on male camaraderie with Columbus and the resistance than sleeping with women, as I don’t imagine he’d have much interest in cell dividing zombies with fabricated personalities, even if he doesn’t know that’s what they are yet!

Now, Scheherazade is actually my favorite character from this singularity besides Wu. I love stories that have trauma & behavior developed from trauma (rather than principle built upon trauma) as an antagonistic force. Having to perfect your craft of storytelling to survive for over 2 and a half years while also suffering abuse and captivity is nothing short of awful, and the fact that this attracts the Demon Pillar to her and allows them to work together is really interesting.

 I did dislike the fact that she seemed more affected by her infatuation with Fergus than his encouragement to find strength and pride in her storytelling, and see her nature as a heroic spirit as a boon to it, rather than something to fear. It feels like a big flaw of her character in FGO, which is that DW can’t decide if they want her to be a shivering leaf that hates fighting, or a sly beauty that subverts authority with her tales. Ideally these two aspects should be combined, but it comes across as inconsistent since there’s no solid in-between to give that transition more nuance. 

That being said, I think the folks that label Fergus’ speech as inherently sexist are kinda missing the forest for the trees. No amount of headcanon or fan interpretation changes that he’s a character highly motivated by carnal instinct, and the fact that it’s the lense through which he tries to argue against Scheherazade’s viewpoint is pretty consistent, though the afore mentioned issues with his dialogue makes his sudden shift back to being horny on main jarring and could be fixed by him always being adult Fergus. I can at least appreciate that the story brings up the clumsiness of his words and that even if they get the message across, the flaw in delivery means that Scheherazade will not indulge him on his terms, even if she’s grown just a tiny bit out of her old mindset (plus everyone calls him out so it’s not like his attitude is treated as being “good”, just that it’s not all there is to him). Bottom line I love both those characters, and Agartha left them both in a place where I’d love to see more about them and their relationship explored!

Drake/Dahut was unremarkable (though I was a huge fan of the character design, and I wish DW would make that a skin for Drake). The concept of Ys and her being a creepy rapist/murderer using Drake as her puppet was interesting, but she really didn’t get screen time needed to do anything with that. Wu Zetian on the other hand, I felt was really fun!

I would’ve liked to see her more before the confrontation while we were in the Nightless city, but her speech about working her way up from nothing to becoming a ruler through sheer tenacity, contrasted against the lady that tries SO hard not to let it show that she likes being doted on really clicked with me. All in all, she definitely swiped Gorgon’s spot as the 4 star servant I’m gonna use that ticket on later in the year!

Penthesilea and Megalos had the highlight of the singularity. Nothing was cooler than fighting a bunch of Amazons as those two clashed overhead, and despite almost losing that fight due to a string of Penthesilea’s intrusions hitting my team, I actually wish they did more damage at this point because I wouldn’t even be mad (fyi Colombus actually got killed by Penth during the Megalos fight and I couldn’t stop laughing).

Now if we’re talking about parts of Agartha I absolutely hated, that’s Phenex with a bullet! Besides his bossfight being the most drawn out and irritating thing ever, the fact that both him and the Pillar in Shinjuku don’t fight us in their more humanoid form feels like such a waste. These are supposed to be 4 (5 counting ccc) Pillars that had enough independence gained to run away from Goetia, so the fact that they still look like pillars and never become those human forms when we fight them seems like a real dropped ball here when it comes to visual storytelling and Story/gameplay integration.Also, after how radical Shinjuku’s final fight was, Agartha really didn’t do much to sell Caladbolg finally going off in the middle of the fight (the poison of Wu’s NP was a nice touch at least!)

so yeah, I had quite a few problems here, but I always regard the art and media I consume on a component basis, and for me, the lows here really couldn’t beat out the fact that Agartha was this really cool combination of fabricated settings with tyrannical rulers facing off against a villain masquerading as a revolutionary hero, with a Nightmare monster appearing anywhere at any time, and our heroes seeking to find out which of these figures was the one truly responsible. 

This was always the strength of the Remnants imo, taking looser concepts that normally don’t fly in Nasuverse fiction, and using it to twist the rules of servants through singularities in a way the original seven didn’t outside of Camelot and Babylonia. It wasn’t as great as those two by a long shot, but at the end of the day, It’s left me quite excited for Shimosa, which I’ve been told is the hypest Pseudo Singularity out of the bunch. 

It sucks that this singularity gets such a bad rap when it has so many cool and interesting things in it, but if people dislike something, then there’s nothing for it. As for me, I’d give it a B- on an F to S scale, with Camelot still sitting at the absolute top for me. Anyway, Happy 4th of July tomorrow if you celebrate it, and here’s to EoR 3 and Shirou eventually getting in the game (lmao nope)

#Big opinion words #no hard feelings here if you disagree! #I wish Scheherazade was higher tier man #I wuv her lots #Also Hydras are annoying and I wish something else dropped that Wine dawg

[mcwriting]

People Like You Have No Imagination

Fictober day/prompt 2! NOT Tom holland (sorry to my new followers...) BUT I do have some ideas for future Tom stories for some of the other prompts and I really thought this prompt went really well with this movie and fandom. Sorry not sorry 🤷🏼‍♀️

Also Ik this isn’t gonna make very many notes as compared to my other work but I don’t really care soooooooo...

Fandom: Z-O-M-B-I-E-S (2018)

Ship: Zed x Addison (Zeddison)

Setting: Seabrook, duh

Word Count: will add later

Warnings: 1 teensy tiny bad word (blink and you’ll miss it)

Rating: K+ (whoop what’s new)

Background: Zeddison is the most pure and wholesome thing ever and when I saw this prompt all I could think about was them and the whole second verse of “Someday” sooooo... yeah lol.

When Zed and Addison first met, it was like sparks had literally flown from either of them. Their connection was undeniable, even to the most biased individuals on either side of the fight. 

Bucky of course tried all he could to keep Zed and his friends further than arms length, and leave it to Eliza to try and chase off the nicest (and prettiest) human Zed had ever seen.

Unfortunately for both sides, that didn’t stop Zed and Addison, who snuck away often to share their ideas of “someday” with one another and imagine life in a better way. The way it should be.

After the zombie bash (when Zed had almost gotten caught past curfew), Eliza and some of the other skeptics finally began to accept Addison for who she was: a kind and loving girl who truly wanted equality for everyone. 

Late into the evening, Zed and Addison snuck away to the zombie light garden, only to be almost caught by zombie containment. Zed had run away from the power plant and back to the heart of Zombietown after watching Addison be escorted away, and he headed towards home, but detoured to Eliza’s house, where he expertly climbed through her window and onto her bedroom floor. 

“Eliza!” He whisper-yelled to the zombie laying in bed. Zed knew there was no way she was asleep, the party had gotten busted only fifteen minutes ago.

Eliza rolled over to face her childhood best friend.

“What do you want Zed? Because I know what I want: sleep.” She stated quietly before rolling back over. Zed still knew better and rolled his eyes before responding.

“I need to talk to you. It’s important!”

She flopped over again.

“Give me five minutes and I’ll meet you at the old swing set.”

Zed was hanging on a swing that was older than him. It had been built many years ago after the first zombie babies were born and grew up a little. The government figured that since zombies could reproduce, they should at least give the children some kind of activities to do as they aged. That died fast, however, when the playground equipment was dumped in Zombietown and never touched again by the people who put it there.

Gravel crunched under Eliza’s feet as she walked as quietly as possible to the little playground. She sat herself in the swing next to Zed and started rocking in it involuntarily.

“So what’s up, loverboy? Trouble in paradise? Decide that humans aren’t your type after all?” She teased, with a hint of offense behind her words.

“This is serious Eliza.”

“Wow. You’re more whipped than I thought.”

“You know what? This was stupid. I should go home,” Zed replied, starting to get up as he shook his head angrily.

“Wait, Zed. I’m sorry. When you said you needed to talk I just prepared for the worst and figured you wanted to vent. I’ll listen to you. Seriously.” 

Zed relaxed back to where he had just been and sat silently a minute before opening his mouth again. 

“We almost kissed tonight. Me and Addy, I mean.” He said quietly, almost afraid for anyone to hear. He was looking into his hands, which were wringing nervously.

“Wait, like. Kissed kissed her? With your lips?” Eliza asked, surprised.

Zed’s turned his head towards Eliza’s with a confused look on his face.

“I mean... is there any other wa- you know what? I don't even want to know. But yeah. I was like, this close,” he holds his thumb and index finger a half inch apart, “to kissing her in the light garden when our old friends at zombie containment busted in and almost caught me. I got away but Addison got escorted home.”

“Zed, I get that you like her, but... I don't want you to get hurt. Our kind have been hurt too many times by them and I don't want to sit by and watch that happen. Yeah she’s nice, and actually a lot cooler than I expected, but you have to keep a guard up.”

“You think I haven't? I was so scared, E. But the other day, and then tonight, and other times too, we've had these discussions, you know? Talking about the future, our future. Long walks in the park, catching movies, just hanging out all the time. She wants us to be equal, to have those opportunities.”

“Long walks in the park? What is this, one of those cheesy human rom-coms?”

“People like you have no imagination,” Zed breathed out jokingly.

Eliza just responded by giving him a light shove on the shoulder, and both of them sat in silence until they decided they were both exhausted enough to go to bed.

After the events of homecoming and cheer championships, Zed and Addison’s relationship blossomed. Let’s just say that they finally had that first kiss (which may or may not have been in a certain light garden during a celebration for the events of the cheer tournament). 

Life was improving for zombies, too. Addison had plead with her parents for countless hours to make changes. Zed couldn't believe how lucky he was, dating the most amazing girl who also just happened to have the most powerful parents in Seabrook.

After all the pleading, curfew was lifted, the coveralls were done away with, and integration was required for all establishments, among other things. This full integration also gave zombies more protection, as there were laws created to punish any places that refused service to zombies just for how they looked and other laws for protecting zombies from violence.

The fence dividing Seabrook and Zombietown, however, was left up as a reminder to all who saw it what had happened and how far the town had grown. Zed was proud to stand under it, especially when he had his arms snaked around Addison.

The couple often reminisced about it, and on their one year anniversary, they went back to the zombie light garden (even though zombies were now allowed to cultivate real gardens, the light garden was kept for its beauty and serenity). Zed planned a picnic after dark, the daylight hours being spent watching movies and walking through the park.

They laid on a blanket under the stars, simply holding hands and enjoying each others’ company. 

“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” Zed blurted out, ending the long period of silence they had held.

“Maybe...” Addison drawled before adding, “But have I ever told you how much I love you?”

They both giggled in response and turned towards each other for a chaste kiss.

“Do you know why we did what we did for our date today?” Zed asked, a smile creeping onto his face.

Addison had a smile on her face as well, singing softly,

“Movies and long walks in the park, hanging out anywhere we want.”

“You know the night we first came here? And I almost got caught? I went home and told Eliza about how we almost kissed that night. How you and I had dreams for the future, for ‘someday.’ She didn't believe me back then. To be honest with you, I didn't really believe myself either. I never expected everything to happen so quickly. Obviously life isn't perfect, but its pretty damn close with you,” Zed confessed.

In response, Addison gave her boyfriend another quick kiss before continuing the song, singing,

“’Someday, this could be, this could be ordinary. Someday, could we be something extraordinary?’” then saying, “This really is extraordinary Zed. I love you and everything that we've done together.”

They then sang the song softly and slowly together, the same way they had their first time in the garden, and when they finished, they curled up under the moonlight and fell asleep in peace.

A/N: wow I just murdered myself with feels. 

@fictober18

#People like you have no imagination #fictober18 #z-o-m-b-i-e-s #disney zombies #zombies 2018 #zed necrodopolous #zed #Addison #addison (zombies) #zed x addison #zeddison