me thinking randall despised johnny for manipulating him and kicking out of ror; in which he harbored his hate for years like he did with sulley and wanted to vengefully show everyone including johnny how wrong they were for underestimating him in college
what randall and johnny's relationship ended up being:
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I'm so proud of myself about finances in the past couple months. I still struggle with money but I did enough meditation and journaling and practicing about it to make myself able to actually face my loans and credit cards and savings and bills and start really truly organizing and addressing them for the first time in years instead of just flying by the seat of my pants.
Like. This is a huge deal for me. I've felt like I'm in deadly danger every time I've tried to think about money for years and years. I'm finally able to look it in the face and stare it down and start to organize and plan on purpose instead of just keeping up with the minimum to stay afloat. I'm so proud of myself.
It's still a refrain of "GUILT (funny link)" every time I think about money but I'm able to actually make spreadsheets and face the numbers and monthly tracking again, and even make a new full budget which I haven't been able to do in ages.
still feel guilt, overwhelm, and helplessness, but no longer feel as much deep elemental shame and terror. that's progress baby
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I see a lot of compassion for (fanfic) writers lately and I'm glad about it. I didn't wish it any other way. It takes a lot of time and a lot of research and practice. It's a lot of work, it should be honoured.
I still wish this compassion and understanding extended more towards (fan) artists as well.
People interact longer with written words and it's easier to genuinely connect with it for most people. And I often get the feeling that most people know by now as well that a lot of work goes into it. But I still don't always get the impression that people realise the same thing is true for art. You just end up looking at it for a few seconds. A few minutes if it really catches your eye, or several times if it speaks to you enough to turn it into your lock screen. But the interaction is so brief and fleeting in most cases. And I get the impression that as an artist you're not allowed to complain over not feeling valued. you're not allowed to air your grievances, or people will just block you and not reblog from you again because there's someone else, someone better, already around the corner.
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what are bradley’s earliest memories of ice and mav? the bits of his perspective on them that you’ve written are so fascinating
fairly unsurprising answer but: ice: when he came to see Carole to apologize for killing goose in ch 2 of wwgattai (sets the tone of their relationship)
mav: something very benign like mav doing magic tricks for him as a little little kid. you know how your earliest memories are always a little fuzzy and always afternoon sunshine? imagine a desaturated maverick sitting crosslegged in the grass in pale afternoon southern california sunshine showing Bradley how he can detach his thumb from his hand and then put it back again. no blood, no bone, no pain, and he’s got this daredevil grin like he’s enjoying separating his thumb from his hand. can’t see his eyes behind his aviators. the best magicians are the ones who can make even their pain disappear. or, playing “got your nose,” holding Bradley’s nose up so he can see it right in front of his very eyes, NO PAIN!, and then making it disappear. “where’d your nose go, Gosling? oh, my gosh, I lost your nose!! how’re you gonna smell? i bet you’re gonna smell bad. get it? get it? —here it is, i found it, don’t worry, it’s all good!” and putting his nose back so everything’s ok. that’s Bradley’s earliest memory of mav.
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