#'like minded' = emotional repression

[aspennntree]

since we only see the fucking. what do i call it. this thing.

when theyre alone do we think oscar has told the others about these weird merge episodes? because it doesnt seem like they know...

#chat i am thinking about this so much #no cause ren said 'oscar just...isnt himself' like does he know whats wrong. does he know. oscar are you talking to your friends. #also im pretty sure oscar was implying that this like. isnt a normal part of the merge. which im now thinking about what the fuck this is #makin another post about it #rwby #tree talks #oscar pine #ozmosis #ozpin #tree can't shut up about oscar pine #no you just know theyre isolating themselves when they can also. like he is not talking to them #i know that because ren is like how the hell did jaune get these bitches to talk to him. #like i feel like they dont know #'like minded' = emotional repression #i dont even know if oscar told them what magic does to them #like if there was any time to bring that up it was when telling everyone about oz being back and that what he did was magic #and he. didnt. #like hes not gonna bring it up of his own accord. hed probably only mention these like merging episodes #is if someone was with one while one happened #i dunno im rambling #i just want to make angst...

[ash-and-starlight]

Hello Ash.

I just finished She Who Became the Sun and I’m crying. Dying. Dead. Deceased. Thank you for jumpstarting the ripping out, stepping on, roasting, and eating of my heart that has just transpired.

Aside from the obvious Zhu and Ouyang, what’s your favorite character parallel in the first book?

HIII thank you THANK YOU im so happy the propaganda got you too <33 and HMM much to think about!! I will say that it's been a couple of years (I think?) since I read swbts so the details are fuzzy but one of my fave parallels are between Ouyang and Baoxiang, especially for how strong they become in hwdtw too. They are both seen as lesser and not conforming to the "male" mongol ideal, ouyang because he's a eunuch, wbx because he's not a warrior. They both go against their roles in a very explicit and performative way: ouyang by becoming a war machine and truly embodying the masculinity of a mongol warrior despite his inability to truly ever being considered one bc of his mutilation, wbx by refusing to become a warrior and acting super feminine (genuinely don't remember how much of it is genuine and how much is out of sheer spite but id say at some point the lines got blurred for him too. the guy has Problems.) Something something "femininity" being forced on someone vs being choosen and its Consequences. They hate each other. they're scheming together. they're scheming against each other. they loved Esen. they had to kill him. being gay is a curse. being gay is a game and i am winning. they fucked each other in a parallel reality. and most importantly they're twinks. this does not even begin to cover how insane their dynamic truly is.

#when in hwdtw u discover that a good 70% of wang's insanity was caused by the homophobic rage ouyang brought forth in him gkfdjkfjgkd #ANOTHER TASTY ONE IS MA AND ESEN!!! THE LOVERS THE HEART THE COMPASS THE OBJECT OF AFFECTION!! #Ma embodying the feminine ideal while Esen embodies the masculine one #they're both defined by their love and by wearing their heart on their sleeve #as a counterpart to Zhu who did Not know empathy before meeting Ma and fell in love with her for this very reason #and ouyang who is certified insane the only emotions he feels are a blood curdling scream and repressed homosexuality #I think of them as like. zhu and ouyang's external hearts. #ouyang had to kill his own to complete his destiny and it killed him too in the end #zhu succeeded bc in the Decisive Moment she listened to hers #oh also they're both thicc #welcome to my sick and twisted mind im not normal about them all in case it wasn't clear #the radiant emperor #ash replies

[moonsickcafe]

I’m not gonna lie, I just don’t see what people are hating about Artrem’s characterization in the second anniversary. I thought it was pretty true to form.

My only real beef is that it felt shorter and off theme compared to the other 3 cards which is a huge shame and feels gross considering it’s such a momentous canon card.

BUT

Artem in the 2nd anniversary doesn’t feel super out of character.

He’s putting off engagement because he feels paralyzed by the act of telling Rosa what he feels/wants because he doesn’t know how to convey his feelings or propose in a way that matches his own expectations.

He’s being distant and aloof as a result, and Rosa is doing what she does best and hyper analyzing his behavior with wrong conclusions (that reflect more on outward situations than internal, since Artem still isn’t great at being open up about that stuff unlike Vyn who knows how to communicate well but withholds as a concerted choice, for example).

All of his background cards see him bobbing and weaving not just how Neil and his parents have affected him in front of Rosa, but also when Rosa or anyone else hurts his feelings/comes to a wrong conclusion about him/his intentions, with fleeting exceptions.

Master of deflecting further questions or the topic at hand with (mostly work) segues.

He’s still being cheered on and brought to reality by his work big sis Celestine, who is so invested in Artem and Rosa that she views it as a cherry on top to see them engaged after her wedding. Which is so lovely. And very in character for her—she loves to see the fruits of her labor happen front and center and now she can hold this memory close not just in regards to her wedding but in regards to Artem and Rosa, who she cherishes. Especially Artem! (Also the fact that Mr. Rodriguez is so on board….busy body power couple)

This in particular is where I feel people are just beefing to beef. Celestine has ALWAYS meddled. And this feels very in character for her to guide Artem where he needs to go in a way she likes. She does it in almost every card she’s in!

And he is still struggling with his abandonment issues from Neil being gone and his parents not being around as much. He feels SO hard for Rosa and in a moment of high emotion and still a bit tipsy off alcohol he makes possessive comments which is also not out of character.

To me, it’s Artem feeling comfortable and going to the next step physically (and emotionally) by REALLY admitting that he’s insecure and his fears are manifesting as possessiveness ie YEARNING for Rosa and for more with her. He feels secure with Rosa. And he fears losing her just like he’s lost others. And he wants it to feel real. He doesn’t want to lose her to a case (Neil) or a career (his mother and father) or anything else!

He wants to feel like it isn’t a dream. He wants it to be solid, fully grounded in reality, in a way a lot of his personal relationships never get to be. No one could know about NXX and the full extent of his relationship with Neil (or the other members). He actively hid who his mother is and by extension who he is to her. Despite his relationships with Celestine and Rosa, he feels leagues away from his co-workers at large.

He wants people to KNOW that he has a truly personal relationship. He doesn’t want to for others or himself to see a large distance between himself and Rosa—like they’re strangers attached by business (like others in his life have been). Rosa is his partner, in all senses of the word.

Not just that, but it’s been a full year since Artem and Rosa started dating. In what world is it out of character for them to be familiar with intimacy. I kept seeing a lot of people saying Artem was too sexual and all he did was hold her and kiss her which he’s done……a lot, probably. They’ve been dating a year by now! The ending implies what we see is something they’ve done before but Artem would like to go farther. And Rosa is all for that but has never heard him say that before now! Because the repressed guy has been giving her repression.

Is the expectation truly that Artem’s first time making out and feeling up Rosa is this card? For real?

I have no idea what future cards will bring and I’m not interested in knowing until I can pull them in Global, but personally it feels like frustration toward future events is bleeding onto this card. Because what was presented does not feel disconnected from Artem’s side story, cards, or characterization as a whole.

There was just less time allowed to expand on what was presented which I agree is not ideal or even acceptable, especially for the 2nd anniversary. It should have been on par with the 1st in that regard, full stop.

But acting like this card pulled away from his established characterization in other cards in a huge way feels disingenuous. It did not! It was just rushed which I HATE SO MUCH. Like Rosa and Artem felt like they had the least time actually interacting within these 2nd anni cards!

And among these 2nd anni cards a big theme was family. Artem’s parents are certainly not dead so their exclusion from this proposal warranted at least some form of explanation. ESPECIALLY since his mother is someone Rosa knows and thinks fondly of and it certainly would have been interesting to see Celestine and Artem’s mother interact together.

His card lacked time to explore what he was feeling and cohesion to the 2nd anni theme, for sure. Which is really sad considering he is one of my favorite NXX guys. Like there are criticisms for sure but mine are more toward the structure of the card

#tears of themis #Artem shows a modicum of assurance in intimacy and suddenly it’s Too Out of Character #he’s a square not totally incompetent #I think it’s so funny Artem keeps getting knocked for being possessive when he is like far from alone in that behavior #EVEN ROSA HER SELF WAS PULLING IT IN THE 2ND ANNI #very directly with Vyn for example #like part of a repressed character is that when emotions do come out they’re often immature #this happens even in his highly praised cards like The Weeds/Gufeng #in fact the ending was just a more intense version of the The Weed’s main scene but since Rosa and Artem are actually in a relationship #it wasn’t just half hearted mumbling it was Artem full on SAYING his immature desires #also the proposing thing….people literally had me thinking he did it without permission like #I even re read some of my favorite cards to see if I was going crazy but NO #he mumbles or says never mind when he gets close to being open A LOT #and now that he’s being open but it sounds immature is Bad like???? repression in my repressed workaholic? it’s more likely than you think!

[aerequets]

omg

has anyone else realized the parallels between Kaz + inej and loid + yor yet????? i just thought about it and omg

big brain, scheming guy that not-so-secretly simps for his stealthy assassin/thief knife wife. I'd even thought that Kaz looks like a dark mode version of loid before. omg

and actually the thing that made me think of this was the whole --

"would you have come for me then?" Dirtyhands would not. "I would have come for you."

-- part in crooked kingdom.

JUST IMAGINE post-reveal twiyor, where loid ends up somehow helping yor despite everything in him telling him not to, and she asks him something like

"I was always an assassin from the moment we met. would you have come to me then, loid? when I wasn't just yor briar but the thorn princess, too?"

and he knows twilight would not. twilight would do her the courtesy of putting her out of her misery, cut his losses and move on.

and he's a seasoned liar, he speaks in the most calculated way, but this time he can't stop himself when he says "I would come for you. I would come for you, and if I couldn't walk, I'd crawl to you, and no matter how broken we were, we'd fight our way out together-knives drawn, pistols blazing. because that's what we do. we never stop fighting."

because that IS THEM. THEY'RE ALWAYS FIGHTING AND THEYRE FIGHTING ON OPPSOITE SIDES AND THEYRE FIGHTING EACH OTHER BUT STILL. STILL THEY WOULD ALWAYS COME FOR EACH OTHER. THEYRE ENEMIES BUT THEYRE MARRIED AND THEYRE IN LOVE

LIKE??? BFISNAKA the quote even has KNIVES AND PISTOLS in it HELLO . HELLO I AM ACTUALLY GOING INSANE RNNNN GOOD NIGHT

#the obsessions i have for these two separate pieces of media are equally deep #and ive loved kanej for so long its like. no wonder i like twiyor so much #and kanej has so many lines that i can see for twiyor #its the dude repressing his emotions because he thinks he's some bigshot genius when in actuality hes falling over himself when wife smiles #its the yearning #its the trauma #ITS EVERYTHING #theyre just two different fonts #kaz and inej are literally just the criminal versions of loid and yor #OH MY GOD? THE MOMENT WHEN TWIYOR FIRST MEET AND TWILIGHT IS TAKEN ABACK THAT SOMEONE WAS ABLE TO GET PAST HIM UNDETECTED? #LITERALLY INEJ #THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT #THE MORE I SEE #MY MIND IS WIDE OPEN RN #six of crows #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #crooked kingdom #kanej #spy x family #loid forger #yor forger #twiyor #agent twilight #thorn princess #sxf #soc #loidyor

[sheltershock]

I have a fun (fanfic) idea that builds around the idea that oh, Sasha is bad a levitation, but Milla is bad a marksmanship. Not just, that they’re bad, but that they’re so bad at it that they can technically levitate/psi blast, but they just do it so wrong it has no effect.

For example, Milla can concentrate a blast of energy from her mind, and she’s pretty good at targeting, but she doesn’t do any damage. It’ll just gently push the target, but only push it enough to where you need special tools to measure the change.

Meanwhile Sasha can create the lev ball and float, and it can exist for a long time without bursting, but it doesn’t suspend or lift anything. If you stand on the lev ball it can support your weight, but it’s stationary. It cannot move. So my idea is that they got assigned to be partners because they have mastery over their own skills and hopefully will teach the other how to actually have function in their powers. The reason they don’t work right is because they’re not in the right mental space and trying to use the opposite technique to achieve similar results.

That and trauma. Milla doesn’t like concentrating/focusing on her own feelings because a lot of her negative emotions is related to the fire, which she wrongfully blames herself for. She’d much rather let her emotions flow from place to place, intensity to intensity than have to face and concentrate on her guilt. Meanwhile Sasha doesn’t want to let his mind wander, because he knows what it’s going to drift to. He’s pretty good at regulating his emotions but not so much reflecting on why he is having an emotion, so it’s just a cycle. But ultimately, they’re both stuck in their ways because they’re secretly terrified of getting hurt again.

So naturally they’d both have to develop as instructors and their own personal relationship to make any progress on anything. They start out with an insultingly basic view of each other, but eventually grow realize how deep and interesting they both are as people. They both even start to realize how actually similar they are and realize their own faults by observing the other person. And the further their relationship goes the better understanding they have of one another and the ability to be vulnerable gets easier. They both admit that they’re afraid of hurting someone and (literally and metaphorically) falling, but they assure the other person that they’ll cover them and make sure they’ll be alright. At some point they both realize that this is the closest relationship either of them really have to another person, to trust someone enough to admit your dirtiest, painful secrets and not have the other person react in a way that only makes you feel worse.

This continues until the lessons get adapted into a way that they can improve and their skills actually become effective. Not good, just functional, below average if will. Milla’s blasts can actually do damage now, but she’s still not great at it. If the average agent can do three(3) damage per blast, and Sasha can do five(5) per blast as an expert, Milla can shoot for about one(1)-two(2) damage per shot. And Sasha can float and move quicker on a lev ball, but the average agent can do basic movements like moving diagonally, Milla can do elaborate flips and poses and stunts, but Sasha can only move in a straight line, and slow descent(in a straight line).

But after they teach each other how to use their skills, they’ve really honed how to work together as a team and thankfully get assigned to work together on missions all the time. So they can truly keep that promise of looking out so they don’t hurt anyone or fall.

#psychonauts #psychonauts 2 #sasha nein #milla vodello #fanfic idea #slash headcancon I guess? #I’ve had this idea floating in my head for a couple of months but I have like three other projects to work on #sorry if this description/explaination/overview is too basic #but I already have like rough scenes written out #like Sasha leaving Milla to practice for ten minutes alone and she accidentally starts a forest fire panicking from auditory hallucinations #so the psychonauts do psychic training within minds now….to prevent further forest fires #and there’s like arcs planned #milla has an identity crisis after losing the one trait she built herself on: being a mother #Sasha has an arc about being more social and allowing himself to be close with someone other than his mentor #and y’know emotional repression #if they are going to fall in love I specifically want Sasha to fall in love after Milla’s identity crisis is solved and she starts thriving #I don’t really know what else to say #good night I guess? #good night!

[dcomposing]

thinking about how the Togami Family™️ holds cruelty and misery as virtues of Strength and how thoroughly engrained that is in togami's character. also thinking about how naegi's whole entire character is that his strength comes from his kindness and desire to create a more pleasant future. thinking about how togami's entire character arc is about realizing that strength comes in many forms and that allowing yourself the space to be emotional actually leads to a greater resilience than just. bottling all of it up. thinking about That.

#danganronpa #makoto naegi #byakuya togami #i think he feels guilty when he experiences things like simple contentment/comfort #like there's a little kijo togami who lives in his brain telling him that happiness is weakness #thinking about emotional repression as a form of self harm #ironically i think that he gets Better about allowing himself to be happy in the canon setting rather than a non despair au #bc the tragedy and his role in the ff gives him a really concrete avenue to view kindness as strength #versus a nondespair au where all he has is naegi telling him that its okay to Feel things and that his family is fucked up #i imagine him just like. sitting down for a cup of tea 20 years post hopes peak #and still having his father's voice in the back of his head like. shouldn't you be doing more? relaxation breeds complacency and weakness #ALSO thinking about his role in the chapter 2 trial with its themes about strength and courage #and how he represents an entirely different kind of warped ideals about strength than either chihiro or mondo #rotating him in my mind rn #really cool and very interesting

[welcometoteyvat]

ykw ga-mings stories still make me emo i really need one of those good old character study comics rn

#i also need chapter 2 of the one fic with him and xiao together asap. something something loneliness idk #i couldnt tell you why i just think their dynamic would be neat and must be explored #like . i dont think x.iao would understand the complicated relationship that is parents and their children #or perhaps why it weighs on gaming even now #i dont think x has deep deep regrets about what hes done in the past #like moving past the killing and dead comrades and the baggage that comes with that #i dont think x has a lot of existing relationships that could be repaired by emotion and communication #like the awkwardness and occasional flood of emotions that comes with being estranged from what used to be possibly your entire world #but hed 100% try to understand in his own way #or if not be one of those mentors who . keeps you busy to take your mind off things #and idk. repression. i can't imagine him any other way besides how that fic (solitude was your oldest friend by sicker) had him act #like strict; rather demanding; but also sosososo caring. #oops posted too early check back on this post in 30 min

[vidavidee]

little guys from the past couple weeks.. i hit em with the deltarune beam

#doodley #tpn #okwarning there is a lot of tags below where i talk excessively about choosing characters in these dumb sketches #OK I NEED TO TALK ABOUT MY CHARACTER CHOICES QUICKLY #I mostly drew the kris/emma + ray/susie + norman/ralsei trio #HOWEEVERRR I THINk there is a lot of other options that also work!!! like.. simply going by colour #i could do ray/ralsei + emma/susie + norman/kris . Which does work imo.. but i think character wise it gets more complicated #because kris works for norman in the sense of acting as a vessel for someone else .. its just in a very literal sense for kris #but i think ray fits kris better because he also acted under the control/to help of others !!! like that was his life plan jsddsk #+ the way kris. stays generally apathetic aside from the moments when they detach themself from the player #like aaaughugh words. characters that are forced 2 repress all of themselves and act as a vessel for others except for the few moments #where they act out angrily because they've been made to constantly live under somebody else's control n dont have an outlet for emotions #<- more ray than kris but i think that the comparison works ehghehg.. #ray could also work as susie with her whole going against the other 2 of the trio and doing things in a more efficient but 'violent' way #plus her whole traumatized kid becomes harsh n rude in order to keep other people away thing #but she works for emma too methinks... more just on surface level stubbornness though #ralsei as norman is like. yea they dont match up in a good few aspects but they both have the same Boy made of wet cardboard energy 2 me #+ i think its silly to make his hair thing into horns :3 #in the end i drew the trio i drew cause it was what first came to mind & i guess it made sense from a silly art perspective to do #protag as protag.. even if emma is the least 'kris' visually its like yaeaea recognizable trio thing. ok done #the promised neverland

[rubywolf0201]

Whenever I see gross hate on these sweethearts, I just have to geniunely ask: ‘What is wrong with you?’

#rubi’s post #sonic the hedgehog #kuroko's basketball #amy rose #princess elise #cream the rabbit #momoi ​satsuki #aida riko #kiyoshi teppei #look I get them suffering from questionable writing and narrative choices #but as characters they’re fine as heck #amy: the next door girl who is willing to befriend anyone which includes small critters and robot enemies #cream: a 6 yr old girl who accompanied by her friend cheese sets out on a mission to rescue her mum! #Princess Elise: a young girl who is emotionally repressed and constantly put her kingdom’s safety over herself #even telling eggman that she would rather die than give him the means to conquer Soleanna #when faced with a dilemma she had reassurance from sonic and proceed to blow out the flames despite the consequences that comes from it #satsuki: a close friend of the GOM and like kuroko was also affected by their downfall #esp since one of them (aomine) was someone she knew from childhood so it must’ve been pretty painful for her #also don’t mind me saying this but I’m starting to lean on aomomo #riko: despite her fiery temper she is THE COACH for seirin a strategist and one of the emotional supports for the boys when they’re down #kiyoshi: an absolute sweetheart who is willing to protect his teammates from getting hurt over his own safety #I get him being a dick to riko during the kiirisaki arc but he quickly apologized #subsequent appearances has kiyoshi being the ‘fun uncle’ to Team Seirin

[deus-and-the-machina]

I havent really been into the current state of the JJK manga for a while, im at the point where its ending might hold some value for me as someone who was already invested in the characters but largely aside from seeing how a few things pan out I just really really couldn't care less. 

that being said I have to thank gege for every new chapter giving us more and more good looking Gojos. the more feral and covered in blood the better, and hoo boy am I getting that.

#god can he just kill sukuna already tho. like idc about this I want gojo v kenjaku #im of two minds on the megumi thing bc I do think its weird that gojo hasn't had any strong thoughts about potentially killing megumi #(tho i do think gege is like. holding them back rather than ignoring them) but I also think the fandom forgets their canon relationship #like yeah its nice to imagine them as a wholesome family but I dont think they even think of themselves as father and son at all lol #guardian and ward morelike. and I do think gojo was a decent guardian but I also dont think that recently traumatized and also annoying #teen gojo was ever like. very emotionally available or comforting. not to say it shouldn't be expected for gojo to be upset about this but #also I think people can get a little too wrapped up in their wholesome family pics. bc for one you can bet your ass gege doesnt care about #tsumiki enough to consider whether gojo was technically her guardian as well and how he'd care about her fate. or even nobaras it seems #holding out for gojo to be simply repressing his feelings and it biting him in the ass later but idk #he DID look strained when realizing megumis soul recognized ultimate void tho :(((( that does make me said :(((((( #anyways sukuna was a fine enough villain for me but ngl hes gotten a lil annoying likewhatevs dude idc. kenjaku is hells more cunty than you #normally I��wouldn't mind his shallow motives and didnt bc he was a threat that contributed to the plot but now that hes out and running #loose hes just so boring idk. like you're just gonna fight stuff. ok. lame. kenjaku vs gojo might actually have some emotional weight to it #idc about this fight and idc about sukuna #like when gojo mentioned his students and they all grinned. that! that that that he cares about them ok gege! #jujutsu kaisen #jjk 230

[daylighteclipsed]

cant stop thinking of brenner stranger things’s quote abt the nina opera in relation to sora kingdom hearts forgetting riku’s sacrifice/death I am fr mentally ill

#‘it’s the story of a young woman whose lover was killed in a duel. Nina was so traumatized that she buried the memory. #It was as if it never happened.’ #as soon as i heard that my brain leapt to Them. the brain rot is real and incurable #but i am just. so fascinated by the concept of magic or other worldly forces being used to depict trauma #of which st rgu and kh all hit on #(com specifically has done this already) #like even if sora’s memories have been magicked away it’s what that represents #the complete rejection and repression of traumatic memories #and what makes me so insane is that he watches all his friends die and he can process every death except riku #it’s all a horrible terrible experience but riku’s death is where sora’s heart and mind cut it off #when the pain becomes just unbearable #and it’s going to hurt so BAD when the mental wall - magic or otherwise - is knocked down and he remembers #but it’s also deliciously tied up in a potential realization of romantic love #riku’s self-sacrifice. such a horrible moment. such a wonderful moment. such an overwhelming memory and flood of emotions attached to it #how terrifying

[partyinthemysterymachine]

SHE TURNED AROUND AND GAVE THAT BIG BOOTY A SLAP

SHAWTY GOT LOW, LOW, LOW, LOW, LOW, LOW, LOW, L O W

#goomt #harry mason #james sunderland #sorry tags! (kinda. a little. magic 8 ball says try again later) but i just need to tag them for my archive gklgkldgk #CURRENTLY EXPERIENCING THE EMOTION OF THIS ENTIRE GIF #THANK YOU RAD FOR YOUR INCREDIBLE AMAZING SERVICE AND VAST KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING OF MY BOYS #i cannot tell you how much fucking joy i get out of james hiding under his coat like this you have done it several times now #and i lose my mind i lose my heart i lose my balls every time. this is something Exquisite and Cherished #harry's gonna bisexually traumatize him out of that pesky repression and Then. #And. Then. #rip harry's knees but you know what? you get it. sad knees are but a tiny price to pay. james please help him up #(not so) SILENT HOES COME 'ROUND TO THE WINDOOOOWWWWWWWW #TO THE WAWLL #i actually have had this open in a tab since you sent it to me bc i need to be able to easily access and look at it whenever i please #but honestly i publish it now because current goomt mood. this is Oh Me (relatable) moment. teehee x420 #i treasure u tumblr user rad heather-garland. you're a peach and a good egg. only the vapest of vibes to u

[designernishiki]

“ugh why couldn’t nishiki see that reina was Right There and would’ve made such a good girlfriend–” he’s gay, susan

#easy explanation. next #don’t say a word about yumi. that whole thing smells like comp het to me and you can’t tell me otherwise #not in MY house #my personal self indulgent hc is that reina is a close friend to him because he goes to Serena alot and gets drunk and when he’s drunk he’s. #like. basically a white girl drunk when left to his own devices and ends up crying and spilling all his secrets and emotions and etc and #reina has inevitably learned a LOT about him through that not even really by choice #most relevantly; that he’s got a Lot of repressed gay angst going on in his fucked up little brain #has never mentioned legitimate or deep feelings for any girls before and it doesn’t even seem to cross his mind to do so unless it’s called #out. mostly just ends up lamenting about the complicated feelings he developed over god knows how long for his best friend #that he’ll probably never act on because he’s probably straight and probably sees him in a more familial light and blah blah blah #whether or not reina has feelings for him is up in the air but either way she figures out real quick that oh man. this guy. needs someone #to vent to and make sure he doesn’t drink himself to death or do something stupid when he’s in one of his Lament Spirals #and well. may as well be her #yeah. anyway. I got sorta sidetracked here point is I think that boy’s trying to do comp het but Failing #that’s my take #nishiki #rambling

[nicolinocolino]

still thinking about when viola brought up elia's mom at the movie bar and he had to excuse himself to the bathroom to cry

#the nuuannceeee in these details it makes me lose my mind #it takes a lot of emotional repression to feel tears coming on and be like 'wait hold on a minute' #and keep it in until you're alone #skam italia #skam italia spoilers #skam italia s5

[lord-shitbox]

every day i beat back the shame and self criticisms with a stick..

#shitboxposting #me when the emotional repression means i dont feel a lot. i feel insufficient #i admire emotional people because i could not be them. cant feel as much as they do and even if i could i wouldnt be able to handle it #at least im literally so fucking sexy though. #anwyays im gonna be going back to class not too long from now. cant wait for the extra stress to drive my mental health down #i think like. at this point im very much Myself. there is definitely a kind of person that i am. a lot of things connect with each other #trying to come to terms withthe fact that this is my life i am alive ive got one shot at it during this era of history and none other #was NOT born with the dinosaurs was NOT born in time to see all the future innovations. there are many wondrous things right here andnow #but i would love the possibilities. #it helps to imagine that i chose this era to live in. that there is something special that will happen in my life & maybe it wont be specia #in terms of history books but it will be special to me #lots in my mind tonight

[ranvwoop]

for aforementioned gem au. fusions. techno is known to be Good At It. he's awesome at pretending to be put together enough. He can put aside whatever is going on for the task at hand. (there is, also, an aspect of being A Means To An End but he says he doesn't need to worry about that until it bubbles over and he does have to worry about that.). Phil + Techno are called Watermelon Malachite and they have this absolutely down.

Ranboo is the opposite end of the spectrum and he is awful at it. They try sometimes. Phil tries to teach him and Techno tries to teach him and I'm not sure if Tubbo is a gem but if he was they try because it's #Romantic (and Tommy says c'mon man it's easy, don't you trust me, ohh wait you just fuse with Tubbo don't you). He can't do it. It simply does not take.

Until Ranboo gets poofed for wayyy too long and they put his gems in his room. He is NOT coming out. (He is afraid because of identity reasons. Experiments analogous). Eventually Phil and Techno are like ... .... he's not like Dead are they. So they try fusing w/ him as a last resort (As shown is possible in EP Change your mind, for some reason)

Except now Technoblade is stuck in Ranboo's subconscious as well . He has to talk and coax him out, heartfelt conversation which is absolutely the strong suit of both parties,

and my long and convoluted explanation for why No ranboo doesn't fuse. but also peerpress fusion is a very fancy Eudialyte (That exists consciously for a whole 3 minutes of Hey! That's neat! before becoming unstable and unconsciously for an undetermined amount of time facedown on ranboo's floor)

#vwoop.noises #rnb Doesn't try again after this. #He's a FAR more sure in his identity that he's Just Ranboo. though . I think of rnb and identity a lot. The experiments #There is no secret cooler/edgier Ranboo. He's just Ranboo and he's got Two Gem. He is not going to form again and There's ew!r #He still doesn't like fusing Tho get out of his brain #I believe he could forcible eject tchno if he wanted in this scenario but he doesn't want to forcibly eject tchno This is needed #Hes Not Forming Otherwise. #tchno... is not built for this he's built for kinda repressing his own issues and beating something up #Phil also believes in the philosophy of repress your emotions become big murdergem but in a different way. Regardless this is about prprd #I've had a few thoughts in my time. About this. I'm going to be real I have no idea what the conversation would even begin to look like #But they do the impossible #They wouldn't NOT say that. Unsure what exactly they'd say. They could come to a helpful conclusion somehow #What if Mndful Education was worse #hmm. I think tchno actually also kind of turns away from it post bedrock breakup. Except WM . Emeralds r Emeralds #This is good for him also. Bonding time by making sure your good friend isn't dead #But yeah Rnb doesn't want to repeat this experience. It's fine. Maybe in an absolute unmatch of strength #Anyways. I've thought a tad abt my gem au and peerpressure. I like the trend and gems coming back #.. agh. In the event of forceful seperation and trying to animate the two gems It's just the soul and the mind again