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macklives · 4 years

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hey so this is gonna be a long-ish one. ive decided its been far too long since i did a session, and we did so many i can often forget what happened. i started in july and im pretty sure its been more than half a year now since this whole blog happened. and in that time, we’ve gone through 88 sessions and i want to know if i remember the relevant plot points and what we got up to in the last few sessions. a refresh/reminder if you would.

so i hereby commence my own little recap of act 5 because yeah no, its too much to do a recap of everything and i have andrew for that after every few acts. but i wanna refresh my mind on act 5 for now. so here we go.

1. alternia.. fucked up place. but its a place the trolls live on so what are we gonna do about it? overthrow the government? seems about right, lets do that with the next troll that gets introduced and if its not kanaya idk what andrew is doing by not having introduced the best troll yet. why the long wait? it was the second introduced? i honestly expected it to go in order when i first read act 5, because first we had karkat talk to jade which was the first new piece dialogue in the comic besides the main kids, but then we had kanaya with rose, which was followed by tavros, then terezi (iirc). so id assume we were following that order but nope karkat got fully introduced, then this random fucking juggalo called gamzee made its way into the comic. imagine my surprise.

2. theres been terminology throughout act 5, that i do not fucking know and will not remember and probably never will. like tf is a perigee again? i made a doc somewhere ill probably find it.

3. karkat’s introduction... short but very sweet. and by sweet i mean we got to know the depths of the angry edge lord. and by depths i mean karkat got angry at gamzee for typing in a way that he didnt like so he yapped like a chihuahua. nah, but seriously, i do like karkat tho, hes growing on me but only bc hes a bitch baby and his whole personality makes me want to mock him so thats the reason im not that annoyed and think hes funny, and the most harmless troll. even more so than tavros. and thats saying something. 7.5/10 bc im generous.

4. then gamzee... the high juggalo troll who has the worst typing quirk imo, i cannot for the life of me read it. but hes chill, i actually really like gamzee. hes funny and the least problematic as of right now. 8.5/10.

5. terezi’s introduction next i think. she likes playing as a lawyer with her stuffed dragons, ie by roleplay, shes blind, can see through licking, and she likes eating chalk, maybe its even nutritious. shes good. 9/10.

6. uhh in the process of these intros, there are teams being made? karkat joins gamzee and terezi in, i THINK, the red team?? bc terezi likes red?? could be wrong, i dont remember the teams except that its red/blue to represent sollux’s duality in those colors. terezi then tries recruiting AC but AC is like lol sorry i have to ask this friend of mine who has authority over me for some goddamn reason and terezi goes yuck tf i hate that guy................... yeah thats all we have on the teams. pretty sure sollux had smth to do with karkat about the making of the leaders, and they did the “i hate me” and the “no i hate me more than u hate u” or whatever the fuck that was. they got embarrassed afterwards and deleted their messages. im pretty sure they have no messages because everything ends up being mutually deleted so their logs are actually empty. ngl, kinda enjoyed their convos, made me appreciate their characters. i hope we get more because its good content. i also dont know what order this whole thing is in, who contacted who first? couldnt tell you. ill remember later on. and since im basing this off from memory alone, gotta deal with what i remember. uhhhh so yeah. we havent met all characters yet so the teams have not been officially decided but we got the bases, which is that.

7. god i found it, and the only thing im looking at right now is the terminology list i made and what the fuck?? what the fuck?? you miss a few weeks and suddenly the word nubslurping comes up and you forget what the fuck youre reading.

8. im PRETTY SURE aradia is seen after that whole team fiasco?? or its sollux... maybe. wait. its sollux, right. i just knew someone gets introduced mid way through is all. actually, someone gets introduced after every 20 pages. i have no idea. but ik aradia and sollux go hand in hand.

9. oh shit. OH SHIT! RIGHT! I REMEMBER! so this occurs in the latest session i did, and not the beginning of act 5, but AG and aradia team up, right?? and sollux fucking gets manipulated by them and ??? idk??? they make him find the game, reprogram it and then make him believe its going to end the world (which in hindsight is true, but anyways) so he refuses to play it which was AG’s plan all along so she steps up and becomes leader in his place. but aradia says sollux will still play the game no matter what, but she never went through with the plan for AG but it was apart of a prophecy? that sollux wouldnt be the leader at all? that he’d still play? but it had to go according to plan so it could succeed??? we just dont know why yet. anyways, point being, she still cares for sollux since she did it for him rather than for AG. and thats what i recall. god tf i forgot about that whole drama until writing down “sollux and aradia go hand in hand” which gave me violent flashbacks to the memory.

10. oh and id give aradia 9/10 and sollux 7/10. i do like sollux but if i put him higher than karkat, id get crucified. so im keeping them around the same.

11. man i really like sollux and aradia tho, i may have put him at 7, but i really like their dynamic and i really hope they make up and aradia explains herself about AG. because from one side it looks shitty. and while sollux is rude and never makes up his mind, he apologized to aradia after going off, and that was the only time ive seen him be sincere, so im pretty sure he cares for her to some extent. and i think its somewhat mutual? considering the whole “did it for him” thing. man, i see potential because i actually like both their characters. theyre well written. may not have the best personalities, but i appreciate well written characters and homestuck has the best ones ive seen in a while.

12. oh shit, hell yeah, the more i write, the more im connecting the dots and remembering. however, the more i write, the more i want to just make an analogy post but thats not for now. jesus christ its not all about analogies, mack, this is a recap. but.. how does andrew do it? to not go off track??? hard. telling ya.

13. anyways, didnt we break the fourth wall at some point and have the demon gods or whatever the fuck speak to us in third person for the first time in the comic, after having only gone into second person narrative, right after we were introduced to sollux and his “virus”? the uh, the phrase “the demon was already here” was said, or something along those lines. first line in homestuck to give me the creeps ngl and i appreciate it bc it gives me motivation to know what the fuck its about. its cool bc you have no idea where its going and it sure doesnt have anything to do with the current plot, since the trolls’ session/game doesnt have fucking demons so im curious as to what the fuck that was about. and if i really have to make a theory, i feel it has something to do with aradia’s voices in her head which also connect to the gods rose heard when she started disregarding rules and told dave to look at derse without listening to music bc it was as if he was purposely blocking away their calls. like holy shit, that gave me the shivers. while i do want to know more about wtf happens after act 4, trolls are taking priority right now. just like we did with the intermission. no discussing the kids unless necessary. treat this as its own separate comic. and THEN we can connect.

14. ANYWAYS, tavros’ intro???? that comes afterwards?? with the fiduspawn that made me gag a little on the inside? yep. remember that. fuck that lol. -1/10 but tavros himself is MAYBE a 6/10? i wish we explored his character more in his intro bc right now he just looks like a character made only to be a victim rather than have any depth and i feel thats robbing someone of their full potential. give me more personality andrew, rather than a quivering boy who falls prey to bitches. im expecting more throughout the comic honestly and i hope he gets growth so hes not looked as a “victim” but rather his own character. he is still sweet, and i like him because i want to protect him, but id rather have more info, you know what i mean?

15. oh hell. kanaya had a chainsaw at some point. that made me happy. and didnt she cut off tavros’ legs?? and he got robot ones? and some creepy dude was looking and we called him saggy tits bc hes sagittarius? right? neat. that did happen. pretty sure saggy tits is ACs friend that tells her what to do. the more u know. OH and they all have colored blood similar to their text colors lol. that i remember... so tavros has brown, terezi has blueish green, um. karkat has grey the loser. and apparently it forms a rainbow which is nice. rainbow is good.

16. i dont remember anything else actually

17. wait no i do. AG appeared. shes a petty bully. idk what to say about her. we didnt get that much, except that she hates tavros but is okay with aradia. she also looks like a bottle opener. actually, i think she teamed with aradia to gain leadership rather than to “be friends”. and while that is similar to how karkat did it, meaning the gain, the motivation and how they earned it is entirely different. kinda seeing a trend tho. the leaders of the red/blue teams are both characters who wanted the role, but never had it to begin with. only to win their way into the position. but rather than ask non-stop like karkat did, AG manipulated others so she could be successful. not too sure if she also used aradia for that, or is actually motivated to become friends since they were “past enemies” and she needed a rebound. pretty sure its somewhat both. while AG did mostly use aradia to speak with sollux, what she doesnt know is that aradia is a bad bitch who never even thought about AG and only followed through with the plan bc she had a plan of her own. i guess we’ll look into that later. i lowkey want to know their history.

18. OH AC!!! she appeared for a second as well. love her. shes amazing. 9.5/10. and you may ask yourself, why am i saying “i love this character” but none of them are 10/10?? weellllll its because, and i cant stress this enough, 10/10 belongs to kanaya, i dont make the rules. im waiting for her introduction, shes my favorite and its obvious. sorry.

19. oh huh seems i forgot about the term “lusus”. which.. is.. their parents but not really, its these fucking weird ass creatures that the trolls fought in a cave or something as a child. i dont fucking know. terezi hatched hers and it died? gamzee’s also died but his goat sea dad was never really there to begin with so while it is sad, its more sad that gamzee never saw him? um.. karkat killed his own by exploding his computer bc sollux said dont run the virus and karkat said u cant tell me what to do and did it anyways. so thats on him. but apparently theyre supposed to die, to become prototyped during the game, right? yeah. i remember now.

20. thats.. about it? idk anything else, nothing is coming back to me apart from the shit above. huh.... im surprised how quickly things do come back to you the moment you rant about the plot tho.... handy trick.

cool. neat. fun. this took me too long. but im glad i remember a little bit.

#i wanted to catch u all up on this #but ill most likely do a liveblog tmr bc i was bust today unfortunately apart from writing this out #bc this took priority for better understanding where i am rn #maaaannnn #writing wears me out #i love it #but its tiring the fucking bitch #so im in need for deep sleep #wish i could do more smh #welll #goodnight :)

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bobbyischill · 5 years

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My Relationship With Andi Mack

Two years ago, when I was in 10th grade, my GSA advisor was telling me and a friend about a Disney Channel show. She hadn’t watched it yet, but apparently one of the main characters had just come out as gay! I was really happy for Disney and glad that queer kids all over the world had someone like them to look up to. However, I, a 15 year old, a mature teenager, wouldn’t really enjoy a kids show, right? So I went about the rest of my day without giving it a second thought....

Until I went home and opened up Tumblr. One of the first posts I saw was someone giving props to Disney for making such a diverse, inclusive show that was actually GOOD. They said it reminded them of Girl Meets World, except it was a million times better and diverse. Okay fine, I thought. I guess I’ll check out Andi Mack. (BOOYY I HAD A BIG STORM COMING)

I opened up my iPad around 10:30pm and decided to watch an episode or two, depending on how tired I was. After the very first episode, I recognized that this show was special. Like, REALLY special. The characters were fleshed out and unique. There was the “twist” about Bex being Andi’s mom. The friendships and relationships felt real. I knew I was going to binge the whole show that night.

That night, as I continued on with the show, I fell in love with each one of them. They all had their own quirks, they were all nuanced. I fell in love with how competitive, protective to a fault, and caring Buffy was. I fell in love with how awkward and goofy and relatable Cyrus was. I fell in love with how kind and oblivious Jonah was. I fell in love with how hard-working and funny Andi was, and how much she cared about certain things and the people around her. I fell in love with the dynamics between certain characters and how they were always changing. I loved how it tackled racism in school (Buffy had to change her hair or be sent home), how unfair dress codes are to students (especially girls), how you need to take a stand for what you believe in (the prison uniforms), and how stepping out of your comfort zone is a good thing, even if you get hurt (Andi watching a horror movie and being terrified, but not regretting it). This was all in the first season.

This show already meant so much to me. And then Cyrus looked back at Jonah. In the words of Jonah Beck, “I cried”. Just that hint of representation was more than I had ever scene on Disney or any other show marketed to kids.

And then Cyrus came out to Buffy. I, a pansexual who was out to my friends but not any of my family and who still struggled with intense internalized homophobia, burst into tears. I related to how ashamed and afraid Cyrus looked. I needed to hear Buffy’s heartfelt response. “You may be weird, but you’re no different.” That phrase was constantly bouncing through my head for at least the next few days (and if I’m being honest, it still is). I wrote it all over my notes and assignments because it was literally all I could think about for such a long time. I saw the sign on the wall that said “G: for General Audiences.” That showed me that Disney (or at least Terri Minsky, my queen) truly felt that I wasn’t a freak. I didn’t need to hide my identity from anyone if I didn’t want to. My identity wasn’t a mature subject; it was for general audiences. (Also, I just want to add that Sofia and Josh’s acting in this scene was absolutely fantastic. It was so raw and emotional, and it still makes me cry every time I see it.)

And then in that same episode Cyrus and Buffy talked about his crush on Jonah. They did it so casually, and my mind was blown. At this point, I had honestly never seen so much gay representation in a show as this.

That night, I stayed up until 5am. I was rewatched Cyrus’s coming out scene about 10 times. I fangirled about it on Tumblr. I added “Tomorrow Starts Today” to my Spotify playlist. I even wrote a diary entry about it. (I only write in my diary when I’m feeling very intense emotions that I need to write down in order to figure out.)

The next day at school, I told all my Gay Friends about Andi Mack and how amazing it was. A few of them got into it, and it was fun talking to them about it, but after a while I was pretty heavily hyperfixated on it and I needed more. And I felt like I was bothering my followers with constant posts about how much I loved Andi Mack. So I made this blog. @cyrus-made-tshirts. I haven’t changed the name since. That’s how I became an official part of the friendom.

I love this fandom. I don’t even know many people personally or have made many friends through it, but this fandom was everything to me. I loved the posts, the crackhead theories, josh’s account. I loved the crackships, the real ships, the overanalyzing of every line, of every movement, of every promo. I loved watching the reactions on YouTube. I loved making posts about the show and having hundreds of people relate to it or find it funny, especially the gay ones. My very first post to get more than 50 notes was one about how Miranda and Bex would make a cute couple (this was before Miranda was revealed to be a snake.)

For the past year and a half, Andi Mack has been my life. I have survived the many ship wars. I have survived the months-long hiatuses. I have survived the ominous tweets and posts Josh has made and the frenzy of panicking everywhere that followed it. And I have loved every minute of it.

I’ve seen these characters I love grow up before my eyes. They’ve all changed and evolved and matured so much. There’s so much more representation since I started watching the show. There’s a character with a learning disability, characters with anxiety, a homeless character, a deaf character. There’s been multiple episodes celebrating Jewish and Chinese culture. I’ve seen Cyrus go from nervously nodding in agreement that he liked a boy to unprovokingly telling his friend he liked that boy to flat-out telling his ex-crush he is gay to holding hands with his crush in public. I’ve seen all of Cyrus’s friends support him unconditionally. I’ve seen him find his happily ever after (for middle school, at least).

And then the last episode aired. I knew I was never going to be prepared for it, but HOLY SHIT, it’s over. And the finale was like a fanfiction it was so good. I watched it live on Thursday night at midnight. I freaked out about it online for three hours, then watched it on Disney Now. I pulled an all-nighter because I just kept rewatching it online until Friday night, when I watched it air on Disney. The way Cyrus and TJ sang Born This Way with the rest of the characters cured my depression, cleared my skin, and watered my crops. The bench scene was so fucking beautiful and romantic it caused me to hyperventilate. The acting from both Luke and Josh was incredible. Honestly, Luke crushed it the entire time as TJ and the bench scene was the icing on top. This scene meant more to met than some people could ever know.

A couple months ago, I was in a pretty shit place emotionally and mentally. Literally the only thing stopping me from killing myself was the guilt of leaving my friends and family behind. I needed another reason to stay, something to keep me grounded. And that reason became Andi Mack. I promised myself I would live to see the day Tyrus became canon. And I did it. I’m in a much better place now, and I’m not going to do anything stupid now that Tyrus has become canon (TYRUS HAS BECOME CANON!!! AAKDBEISSHSB I STILL HAVENT PROCESSED THAT YET!!!!). But at the time, I really needed Andi Mack to help me keep fighting. And it was there for me. And I will always be indebted to it for my life.

This show has helped me in so many other ways. It’s helped me drastically reduce my internalized homophobia. It’s given me a community of people that understand me. It’s created so many characters that I love. So thank you to Terri Minsky for creating this show and amazing characters that I will love forever. Thank you to Disney for funding it and not completely censoring it. Thank you to the crew for working tirelessly to make this happen. Thank you to Peyton, Emily, Asher, Josh, Luke, Lilan, Trent, Garren, Sofia, and every other actor for pouring their heart into this show. A special thank you to Josh and Luke for making me feel safe and loved and for caring so much about their story arcs. (And their political activism is pretty awesome, too.)

I’m really going to miss screaming about this show with you guys. I really hope that some people keep creating fanart and fanfics and keep making memes and crackships. I hope the friendom never dies. Because every one of you is so special and fun to hang out with online. And I’m really gonna miss it. And now I’m crying, and this is getting WAYYY too long, so I’m gonna stop talking now lmao. But I want to say this show has changed me in so many ways and I’m grateful to every single person involved, including the amazing friendom. I’ll love you all forever. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#andi mack #thank you #thank you so much andi mack #my relationship with andi mack #personal

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weirdness-on-the-roof · 5 years

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critical role episode 48 campaign 2 notes and funny lines post break edit:this has detailed notes on all the stuff that happened later in the episode including physical descriptions near the end. enjoy ya nerds

don’t steal the books from a high powered mage; don’t kill the dude; beau turning into cad; look at beau planning for the future

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is marisha flirting with matt via matt playing yasha and beau flirting with yasha?

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‘tea the international language’ but no earl grey

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wensworth the goblin

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coming from Cad ‘im a fine tea maker’ is kinda a threat tbh

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elf that isn’t white/European??? yay! also really old elves are cool

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beau and cad tag teaming a political chat with a mage this can’t end poorly

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Nott: :beau ruins every situation shes in and is very abrasive

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send the freaking cat!!! why not?? caleb my dude

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god i miss allura and gilmore currently

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fucking fuck don’t lie to the mage beau plz stop this is painful ‘you’re not wrong’ sure blame the ancient sea god

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‘on the verge of returning’ yea no duh you let him out 2/3 of the way so fjord could get a spell

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‘we found a thing’ so smooth and eloquent beau ‘it was presented to us as the happy fun time ball’

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‘butter fingers with magical items’

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beau getting a geography lesson from a very old powerful elven mage

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‘magical geometric orb that has the ability to bend time and space and fate’ which is kept in a hot pink magic bag that happened to ‘fall into [their] lap’

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‘if youre down im down is what im saying... i have a few slots open in my loyalty bank if you’re willing to pay rent’ says the 20 some human who punches things to the centuries old wizard ‘

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liam stress eating

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cad’s hope in the group is heartwarming

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tower metaphors and a conversation!!!

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caleb reading shitty romance novel and nott eating a fish outside a mage’s tower in the morning sunlight in a major city

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caleb takes the rear

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first name drop and a while

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holy shit 200 years of magic using

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cad explaining materialistic nature of the rest of the party to elf dude is hilarious

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teleportation circles?????? in return for access to the sphere!! oh shit thats good

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or candy

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crap. no one has insight checked this dude and they gave him the happy fun ball and made a deal kinda.

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‘how do we prove our loyalty?’ ‘by not fucking me over’ sounds like a good plan

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is this guy just caleb’s patron now on the low idk this is how my head works and he said learn

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“you have a geometric shape that makes babies?” “yea they talked about that”

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fjord just kills the dude

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‘i got banishment on hold just in case’ *cackling laughter*

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i agree with elf dude, him not knowing anything about the dodecha is more concerning than him knowing about it

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ALL THE CITIES FROM CR1 MENTIONED FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! I STILL MISS ALLURA AND GILMORE

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good to know the pink bag protects from divination on this plane but just this one

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jester and the traveler figurine

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cad included the Traveler in the ‘chaotic forces’ i still think the traveler is some kinda arch fey evil things idk its real late here and this is incoherent

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‘well, thats been my morning tea‘

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caleb getting additional tour

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good aesthetic for the room tbh

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letting weird people in for morning tea is entertainment is a mood and something i strive to be able to do without getting murdered one day

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so yasha and caleb both have gotten the ‘stay with friends’ chat from a powerful being which is nice. but also the ‘use who you need to’ going to caleb is vaguely concerning

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personalized biscuits [bourbon, cinnamon, lobster, fish and three unknowns]

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‘caleb, what happened in there?’

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cad not believing caleb’s bullshit and opening doors for caleb warms my heart

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‘if this isn’t the death of us, and if not hes a good ally. somethings gonna be the death of us so [yolo]’

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‘you can’t bullshit everyone in this world’

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cad talking about beau telling the truth: ‘you’re not very good at it but you tried

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jester looking out for nott and her home town

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caleb and beau being cute while also giving each other shit is the most sibling like thing

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omg going back to allfield that was so long ago for fucks sake BRYCE my person thank god

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jester had a boy band phase its cannon and i think the girls had a sleepover in jester’s old room. also marion never leaves the hotel. THE RUBY NECKLACE MY HEART AND THE HONEY AWWWWW

‘the army of men and women and inbetween that will do as i want them to’ god i adore her being protective of jester

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also the fact matt makes such a good mom why is he like this

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travel time!!!! ‘roll for initiative’-tal

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how does matt keep these notes so organized and remember all the npc names

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the ranger/beast master in Laura is coming out with nugget

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caleb is a devout cat person and jester is the definition of a dog person

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nott refining oil on a magical moving cart, while jester reads a romance novel and trains a dog,

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Dyren- Beau’s roommate at colbot souls; ‘taught beau lots of really cool things’ got sent to a warfront. shaved head, dark clothes, buff b/c ‘been workin out’, ‘do you love her?’ they had ‘good times’, then literal booty call, and dropping locations, Dyren was in Bladegarden. ‘fierce eyebrows, pointed nose’

OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES

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Vandren info drop to Fjord ‘he was making amends’

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Dyren responded and was hurt in Bladegarden but is safe. Beau looked immediately worried and happy about jester’s imput [’sounded way into you’]

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empire kids chat and caleb admitting insecurities about powerful people and being scared about the consequences of his actions and the group’s actions. caleb is scared about being forced to leave for safety and being ‘flayed alive’. my thoughts are he would leave if he became a threat to the others by being there or vise versa. trent would extort that b/c hes a dick

“caleb, unfortunately, you don’t get to choose who cares for you” you’re fucking correct Beau

“the problem with friends is that you have to care for them”

walks away “wow cool caleb! see- jester thinks you’re cool because shes your fucking friend!”

me too Tal “everything i like about those two characters in one conversation”

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5 years since Caleb left Trent and crew ie had a nervous breakdown

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gustav left town after being freed and trostenwald now has a WV accent that is too familiar

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100 extra soldiers in allfield. bryce is still up and kicking and wonderful. stuff ‘got this far east [quickly]’. the attacks came from underground apparently so fuck. the fields were burned, building destroyed a bit then they [Xhorhasians] left

“good thing is they’ve already been attacked so lightning doesn’t strike twice” oof thanks bryce

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beau just dead ass asking for illegal writing statements

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fjord having a thank u jesus bryce moment

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jester giving cad a pretty present is ‘so exciting’ and precious

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Cad not knowing cookbooks were a thing!!! and not being utterly literate enough to understand it

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wtf happened to liam’s voice in the ‘main export is oysters’ thing

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FELDERWEN!!!!!

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a dozen squads of 50 ppl each patrolling felderwen area so rippppp

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Nott knows where the halfing’s house is.... interesting... and is heavily drinking

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BLUE FLASH

elven woman in fine clothes of green and black ----lady vest durogna the arch mage of antiquity serboros assembly

a male figure in deep blue robes, older pale elf, fine clothes, the flash came from him----- martinette luden’th de____ arch mage of domestic protection

CALEB KNOWS THEM BOTH FROM THE ACADEMY AHHHHHH

he just lays flat and hides in the cart internally: ‘nopenopenopenope’

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several burned buildings, a warehouse, an inn, apothecary and several houses

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ohhhh shit the halfling was the owner of the apothecary and nott was looking for the shit she had been sending back this whole adventure....... im sad now that was confirmed

havent found a body of yeza

luke is yeza’s son at old edith’s house

halflings only produce halflings according to something i read at some point but forget where sooooooooo

shattered vials and materials and house stuff

CHILDREN'S TOYS

locked basement which nott knows of?? Nott is anxious and impatient when the door doesn’t open. jester fails, yasha rages and at a 19 and doesn’t break the door. ‘it wasn’t [trapped]’ but dispel magic worked to open it.

a 15′x15′ room, tossed ‘not like you remember’ to nott, a 2x3 iron chest. a single chair in the center of the room. definitely a struggle with heavy impacts and blade scratched on wall

nott was the torturer from the goblin tribe

chair was placed in the spot after the struggle

this was where he [yeza] kept chemicals according to nott

poisoned iron locked box (dull black glass) inside a retractable silver tripod to hold something atop it, 3 empty vials 1 full one with a liquid/gas fog like dull colored thing, a pile of destroyed notes [two pieces of still legible paper which have props]

dunamous field, causes ppl slow to be slower or faster, ‘captured crin operatives’ dunaments and dunamacy, origon gliffs, exist outside established schools of magic, theory in deeply rooted in arcana taken for granted, rooted in _____ town, 12-16 months to refine, word has found me that trent’s kiddos have knacks for this things, dreams are thrilling

well shittttt

crin on battle fields, ‘breaking fields of fate, fuck the raven queen

SHIIIIIT

a piece of dunemous

dodecha goes in tripod according to beau

chair facing chest

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cricks did this apparently

a little under 100 crowns guard killed, 4 civilians burned

soldiers just ‘slowed down’

left via tunnels and collapsed them behind them

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nott dont be a bitch and don’t get mad at caleb and call them ‘his people’

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cad picks up caleb and ‘youre not at fault here, youre the solution here. don’t let her anger... its not about you’

my HEART

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the chest is too big for the haver sack but fits in lorenzo’s bag of holding

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people have entered and exited since the attack and left the chair and stuff

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lots ‘o chairs

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nott needs to see ledith and uke (?) and not flip the fuck out

‘humble hobble’

nott looked like halfling plump face, braids, tan skin

edith- human older, grey hair, beady eyes, ever present smile like face

LUKE IS HER SON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CANNON

*edit- rewatching this and seeing ever one’s faces “wheres my son?!” particularly laura/liam/travis just hurt. liam just looked up after a second and travis did his face he does and laura just stiffened and eyes and hand to face. caleb/liam who knows just hugs himself the rest of the convo. marisha is note taking and fuck the video off now

about 5 yrs old, blue eyes, tan/light brown skin, halfling

gave him the doll of the king

IM GONNA CRY NOW BYE

‘HES PROABLY DEAD NOW TOO LIKE I THOUGHT YOU WER’

yenza locks him away when ‘the mean lady comes by’

mean lady has pointy ears and comes often, luke was kept in room, luke was pushed out of the house and told to go somewhere safe so he ran to edith’s house and ‘everything was on fire’

‘im not strong enough to come back yet but know that [im stll thinking of you and i send things] and i hope dad sends them to you.“ fuck my heart

“in my heart i think he is” “well don’t die”

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the elves are gong to the ruins of yenza’s house

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marisha looked so betrayed

tal ‘i was waiting for the riegel shoe to drop’

WOW

HEY CALEB- WOOOW

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we’ll pick up hiiiere

fuck you sam and matt and everything abou this my heart is just FUCKKK

ummm so enjoy the frantic poorly taken notes <3

#critical role spoilers #spoilers #lore drop #ohh shit #fuck you sam #not okay in the slightest why are you like this #i dont have words at this point

2 notes · View notes

princehuii · 7 years

Note

can you do a fluff about vernon being your best friend, but you secretly have feelings for him? you can make up the rest! thank youu ~

In Vain

Word Count: 5002Genre: angst angst anGST (with fluffiness ish? idk)Pairing: You x Hansol (Vernon)Warnings: nothing major, just some light cussing here and there, and a bit of dirty humor

Sometimes Cupid runs out of arrows and only shoots one person instead of two. And sometimes, Cupid is cruel enough to make you fall in love with someone who doesn’t have enough room in their heart to love you.

A/N: sorry this took sO SO long… what’s motivation…..i havent posted anything in over a year yiKes. I merged these two requests together bc if I didn’t………you’d have to wait another year to get the other one written LOL. sorry if this isnt exactly what you wanted !!

something to keep in mind: this takes place around the spring time! all events occur in chronological order, except for one flashback (which I hope I made obvious). enjoy~

“Hansol, what the hell are you doing?”

“Look, it was just sitting there so I took it. What’s wrong with that?”

“Well, for starters, we’re at Mingyu’s party, and you just took the entire plate of chocolate cake. Don’t you feel any shame?”

“Not at all,” Hansol shoots back while cutting himself a slice of cake, “Why would I? I love chocolate cake.”

“If you really had no shame, please explain why we’re crouching behind this ratty, gross-smelling couch.”

“…listen Y/N, you’re supposed to be my partner in crime. You can’t just call me out like that.” Pouting slightly, he hands you a white plastic fork, “Now dig in. I know you want to~”

Breaking into a smile, you give in, taking a piece of cake and eating it. “Oh my God, Hansol, this cake tastes like heaven.”

“I know. Damn, I’d marry the person who made this. It’s so good.”

“Wow, you must have really low standards then. How can you say you’d marry a person when you haven’t even met them? What if the person’s a stuck up piece of cra–”

“Yeah I agree, I think Hansol’s a stuck up piece of shit too.” A familiar voice cuts off the conversation, and when you look up, you see Seungkwan standing over you two, “Uhm, why are you guys hiding behind this sofa? And why do you have an entire plate of cake?” The round faced boy glances at you for a second before pointing an accusatory finger at his friend, “It was this punk’s idea, wasn’t it?”

“Well, first off, I wasn’t calling Hansol the stuck up piece of poop, but he might as well be for stealing–”

“–it’s not stealing! Mingyu told me to help myself–”

“–but he didn’t mean to say take all the cake! Think of it as those people who leave out a basket of candy on Halloween. Don’t be that jerk who takes the whole basket.” Seungkwan finishes, shooting a glare, “Anyways, if you weren’t insulting him, then who are you guys talking trash about?”

“He was saying that he’d marry the person who made this cake, and I was like, would you marry that person even if they were a jerk?”

Seungkwan spins to face Hansol in an instant, “The cake is really that good?”

“Yeah man, try some for yourself.” Hansol pushes a piece of the dessert into his friend’s mouth and looks at him, anticipating his reaction.

“Holy…this is really good…how dare you two hide it from everyone else!” Seungkwan exclaims, “Give me more of that, you self-centered prick.”

“Why should I? I already gave you a taste. Isn’t that good enough?”

“I could introduce you to the person who made the cake. I think you and Y/N would get along with her pretty well, since she’s really nice. Do you want to meet her?”

Immediately, Hansol’s eyes light up in excitement, “Sounds good.” He agrees almost immediately, and gives Seungkwan the rest of the cake. “Let me meet this cake goddess.”

“Thank you for your payment, kind sir,” Seungkwan bows jokingly, making Hansol roll his eyes, “Follow me. You too, Y/N.”

“Hey Eul! I want to introduce you to some fans~”

“Wha-What? What are you saying?” Hansol sputters, after almost spitting out his soda.

“I didn’t know I had any fans,” The girl laughs and holds her hand out to Hansol, “Nice to meet you, I guess? If you haven’t been able to figure it out, I’m Eul. My mailbox is next to Seungkwan’s.”

The first thing that stands out to you is how bright Eul is. Her lips are turned up in a genuine smile that’s nearly as radiant as the sun and her eyes smile along with her mouth, twinkling and sparkling, even though the room is dimly lit. Contrasting with the soft angles of her face, her auburn brown hair is cut sharply at her shoulders.

As you compared yourself to Eul, an anxious feeling in your stomach grows when Hansol leans forward to shake her hand, “N-nice to meet you too…I’m Hansol…and I really like your cake…”

“He’s pretty shy when he talks to girls,” Seungkwan snickers, “But yeah, he really, really likes your cake. He took the whole platter.”

“Seungkwan!” Hansol hisses.

“He also said he’d marry the person who made it, so you’ll probably get a proposal from him soon. How does being Mrs. Chwe sound?”

“Seungkwan!”

Eul bursts out laughing, covering her mouth with her hand, “I hope you don’t find this insulting, but that’s kind of endearing. I’m flattered,” she manages to say once she catches her breath. You catch Hansol with his mouth slightly open, looking slightly taken aback–no, in awe–because of her laughter.

Even her laugh sounds nicer than mine… You bite down on your bottom lip to keep yourself distracted from your thoughts.

“Yeah, Hansol, you’re real charming,” Seungkwan deadpans, “Anyways, this is his accomplice who helped him carry out that plan.”

You smile politely and offer your hand out to her, “Hi, I’m Y/N.”

Eul beams and shakes your hand, “Hello, it’s nice to meet you too!” After her greeting, there’s a moment of awkward silence before Hansol breaks the it, much to Seungkwan’s and your surprise.

“How do you know Mingyu, Eul?” He immediately sees your expressions and quickly adds, “I’m not trying to be forward or anything. I was just curious.”

“Oh, we’re in the same Organic Chemistry class, but I didn’t talk to him until I went to the pet store one day…and we ended up playing with puppies for three hours together. What about you?”

“I met Mingyu in Biology class, and Y/N works with him.”

“Wait, aren’t you a culinary arts major? Why would you take Organic Chem? It sounds like a pain.” Seungkwan groans, “I would never take that class. Too many chains, functional groups, carbons, and poly-whatevers, ugh.”

“They said it’s supposed to help me out in the long run,” Eul sighs, “But it’s killing me right now. What’s your major, Hansol?”

“Me?”

“No, the other Hansol. Yes you, you idiot,” Seungkwan quips.

Hansol gives him a look that could kill before he answers, “Uhm, this might sound kinda dumb but I–my major’s anatomical sciences.”

“Woah, that sounds really cool! Isn’t that field also pretty hard? You must be really smart, huh. What about you, Y/N?”

“I’m…” Hesitating, you look down at the floor and mutter, “I’m undecided.”

“Ah, there’s nothing wrong with that!” Eul rests her hand on your arm and smiles softly, “You still have time.”

“Yeah…I guess…” You murmur. It’s quiet again, and the feeling of discomfort suddenly overwhelms you. Clearing your throat and shifting around a bit, you say, “I’m going to get some water, I’ll be right back.”

“Alright, if you don’t come back in ten minutes, I’m going to call the police,” Seungkwan jokes.

You laugh half-heartedly and shake your head, “Don’t worry about it. Do any of you guys want anything to drink?” All three shake their head, so you go off alone to get something to cool you down.

When you return about five minutes later, you see them talking to each other as if they’d been friends for a lifetime, and, sensing that you were out of place there, you left.

And as you expected, no one comes to look for you, even after ten minutes have gone by.

It was sweltering outside, which was out of place considering it wasn’t even summer yet. Unfortunately, your dorm’s air conditioning wasn’t functioning well, and you couldn’t get it fixed until the next day.There was so much sweat pouring from your face that when you wiped your forehead, you could see a bunch droplets left on the back of your hand.

To withstand the heat, you were eating a popsicle while sitting in front of a small, rickety fan that you managed to get for $20 from a friend. Its loud whirring is the only sound you can hear among the unusual silence in the building. If you turned off the fan, you could probably hear a pin drop.

I guess everyone else feels dead today too.

Groaning, you lie down on the floor, and reach for your phone that had fallen under your bed. Your fingers fumble over the screen as you click on Seungkwan’s number.

“Yes?”

“Help me out, Seungkwan, I’m dying of boredom and heatstroke.”

“Oh, are you, a common peasant, asking me, the most amazing person in existence, for help?”

“Shut up, idiot. The AC in my room isn’t working, and I don’t have friends or money to go anywhere.”

“Uh, go to the library or something, you leech. And besides, weren’t you the one who ditched me at the party? Why are you crawling back to me now?”

“I mean, you were having a great time with the others…so I thought it would be fine…”

“That’s not the point! I was really worried about you. I went all around that place looking for you. I saw so many couples making out, my God, it was like walking around in a virtual-reality porno. You know, I even stumbled into a–”

“‘–threesome practically about to get it on like rabbits.’ You already told me, Kwannie, multiple times.”

“It was traumatizing and extremely embarrassing. For them, of course. I’m never embarrassed.”

“Yeah, of course you aren’t. Anyways, I’m really sorry about that, so, do you want to go get some ice cream or something?”

“I would love to, but I kinda just started my paper for musical theory, and it’s due tomorrow.”

“Oh, damn,” You whistle, “Good luck with that…”

“Try calling Hansol? If he says he’s ‘busy’, just guilt trip him because he didn’t help me go look for you.”

Your heart twists at this, and you squeak out, “He didn’t?”

“Nah, that punk was too busy chatting it up with Eul. Can you believe that? He is such a fake friend. He didn’t even realize that you didn’t come back until like, four hours after you took off.”

Ouch.

“Man, looks like I have to go fight him then,” You say flatly, half-joking and half-serious.

“No worries, I already did. He looked pretty sorry about it, so I’m sure you can still use it against him. But if for some reasonhe still refuses, I’ll treat you to ice cream tomorrow. I have to get back to my work now though, tell me how it goes!”

“Alright, see you around Seungkwan~”

“What are you doing here?” Hansol whispers lowly, speaking through the small crack between the door and its frame.

“I’m here to hang out with my best friend, why else?” You explain, as if it were the most obvious thing, “The air conditioning in my dorm isn’t working, and Seungkwan shot me down, so you’re my next best choice.”

“Right now isn’t a good time, Y/N,” He hisses.

“Why not? Is there something you’re hiding?” Standing on the tips of your toes, you try to look inside his room.

“Uh…my room is, my room is really messy,” Hansol stutters, shifting to block your view, “I don’t want you to see, uh, yeah…”

You squint at him with a frown, “Are you lying to me right now?”

“Hansol, who is it?” A girl’s voice rings from inside, and you start to piece things together as Hansol clears his throat.

“Eul, is that you?” You call out. It can’t be, right? How would she have gotten that close to him so quickly? There’s no way–

A hand behind Hansol pulls the door wide open, and you’re greeted with a familiar, beaming bright smile. “Yeah, it’s me, Y/N! It’s good to see you!”

“Wow, no wonder you were trying to hide her from me,” You joke, “You wanted to get some alone time with a pretty girl.”

Hansol laughs awkwardly and waves his hands around, “No, it’s really not like that…”

“OH.” Eul snaps her fingers, “Are you uncomfortable with me being alone with him?”

“Huh?” You look at her in disbelief, “Why would I be?”

“Aren’t you two dating?”

“No!” Hansol exclaims, “It’s not like that. We’re just friends.”

“Oops, my bad then!” Eul sheepishly grins, “I didn’t mean to make things awkward.”

“Ooh, that kinda hurt, you said no so quickly. Is the thought of me being your girlfriend that painful?” You ask with a joking tone, but your intention is anything but a joke. Does he really think nothing more of me?

“A little yeah,” Hansol says, sticking his tongue out, “Now that you’ve found me out, are you going to come in? She’s teaching me how to bake that chocolate cake.”

“I’ll…pass. I don’t want to interrupt your date. I’ll just call Mingyu or something,” You say, backing away from the door, trying to ignore your heart clenching, “Don’t mind me.”

“Are you sure?” Eul frowns, “We can all bake together.”

“No no, it’s fine. I came here to escape the heat, but I think baking would make me hot right?” You knew your excuse sounded insincere and fake, but it was the only thing you could think of. “I’ll see you guys later then.”

Before they could ask anymore questions, you turned around and walked away, ignoring the pain in your chest.

“Hey Y/N, I have a question for you, can I ask it?”

A week had passed since then, and life resumed as normal. You’re working an afternoon shift at the local restaurant near the campus. There were hardly any people there, but it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary; you wouldn’t expect people to eat Italian food at three o’clock in the afternoon. Mingyu was standing with you and making small talk until he suddenly changed the subject.

“You just asked a question, Mingyu.” You roll your eyes playfully, “Go ahead and ask me while I’m splitting this check.”

“Do you like Hansol?”

You freeze, finger hovering over the monitor screen. Panic sparks and a million thoughts race through your mind at once while you quickly continue your work, “Why would you think that?”

“Ah, I don’t know why I asked that when I know the answer. Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who knows,” Mingyu continues, “So, how long have you liked him?”

You’re quiet for a moment before you answer, “Maybe two years?”

“Holy shit,” he breathes out, “Why haven’t you confessed? Hansol’s as dense as a solid block of metal. He’s not going to find out on his own.”

“I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. Besides, why do you care? You’ve never asked me about Hansol like this before.”

“Well…” Mingyu trails off and bites his lip nervously, “I don’t think I should say this…”

“Since you already started, just spit it out.” You sigh, “You can’t just raise my curiosity like that.”

“I…uhm, you’re right, but…” He sighs. He leans against the wall and frowns, “This is something you’re probably better off not knowing.”

“Mingyu–”

“Hansol likes Eul.” Mingyu blurts out, but once he realizes what he’s said, he immediately clamps his mouth shut, pressing it into a thin line. He doesn’t look away though, gauging your reaction.

“Hansol…what?” Waves of shock resonate through your body as the words repeatedly echo in your head. Your heart drops.

Hansol likes Eul. Hansol likes Eul.

“He, uh, told me yesterday. I ran into him while he was grocery shopping with her, and when she went to the bathroom, he asked me for advice…I mean, he didn’t mention her specifically, but it was pretty obvious.”

I knew it.

Your vision begins to blur, and your surroundings began to tilt back and forth slightly.

“Y/N, are you alright?” You could feel a hand grab your upper arm, and you stumble towards it.

“I’m…I’m going to go…” You lean in towards Mingyu’s support, and he offers you a sad smile.

“I understand. I’ll finish this check for you. Do you want me to take you home?”

“I…” The idea of sitting on a crowded transit bus in your current state was certainly not appealing, so you mutter, “Can you?”

“Of course. Just go get your stuff and wait up for me, okay?” Mingyu pats your head and sighs, “I’m sorry you had to find out this way.”

“Hey.”

“What?”

“Hey Y/N.”

“What?”

“Y/N hey.”

“Don’t make me get up and leave, Hansol. What do you want?” You retort, swirling your straw around in your drink.

“Wow, so cruel. I barely saw you this last month and you’re being so rude,” Hansol laughs back, “What’s up though? I haven’t seen you in a while.”

“I’ve been busy,” You reply. To be honest, you were avoiding him. After your conversation with Mingyu, you began to distance yourself further and further away from Hansol. Whenever you could, you would make an excuse to not see him, and if you had no reason to leave, you would stay as far away from him as possible. Nearly everyone had picked up on it, but no one said anything. It was as if they all sympathized with you and tried to help you through it. “How have you been though?”

“Pretty good, though finals are kicking my ass. You?”

“Same as you I guess,” Does this count as lying if it’s only half of a truth? Biting your lip, you hesitate before asking your question, “Have you made any progress with Eul?”

“Ah…” Hansol sheepishly rubs the back of his neck and smiles, “Well, I confessed…”

“And…?” You grit your teeth together, knowing what was to come.

“We’re dating now!”

No amount of preparation could have braced you for his words as you feel your heart constrict. Your eyes sting, and a lump forms in your throat, pushing you closer and closer to sobbing. Sure, you had already learned from Mingyu that Hansol liked Eul, but having them become official was…it. You no longer had even the tiniest sliver of a chance with him anymore.

“Honestly, she’s the sweetest. She gets so shy and cute whenever I do something for her, and she’s patient with me whenever I screw up,” Hansol continues, not seeing your reaction, his eyes glittering as he motions excitedly with his hands, “We have a lot of similar interests and she’s just, like, the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” You stand up abruptly, chair hitting the wall behind you loudly, and your hands curl around the edge of the table. People begin to look your way, but you ignore them.

“Hey, are you okay? You’re shaking.” Hansol stands up as well to reach out to you, but you turn away from him.

“I’m…not feeling well. Too many all nighters I guess?” You ignore your cracking voice and force out a laugh, but all that comes out is a choking sound, “I’m going back to my dorm.” You take a step forward and nearly stumble, and you curse yourself in your head.

Hansol puts his arm around you to steady you with a concerned look, “I’ll walk you back. I wouldn’t want you passing out.”

“I’m fine. Just leave me alone, please.” You muster all of your strength to push him away, and with a smile, you walk away.

You’re wrapped up in a blanket, every part of you covered except your eyes. The only light that is on in your room is the light from the laptop as you watched movie after movie, with varying amounts of brightness as scene by scene flickered by. You would hate to admit it, but you had been in this state for the past couple of days after Hansol’s revelation.

For the past few days, you didn’t set a foot outside your dorm room, and you hadn’t communicated with anyone. You would get up to eat, go to the bathroom, brush your teeth, and go to your bed and sleep, only to start the same routine the next day. Your phone was laying somewhere around the house, and on the first day it was ringing nonstop, but you didn’t bother to touch it. After a while, it silenced, though you didn’t know if it was from your phone dying or if the person who was calling stopped. Either way, you couldn’t be bothered with it, or anything else for that matter.

Your dorm has started looking more and more like a tornado had torn through it with each passing hour. Empty ramen bowls and water bottles littered the floor, and amidst all of it, you were sitting on the floor in front of your computer as you watched yet another film.

“It was almost as if it were a scene from a dream. Nothing more, nothing less than a beautiful view.”

The starry, beautifully drawn sky sparkled before your eyes, and just as a streak of light from a comet swept across the screen, a streak from a tear appeared on your face.

“Jeez, Hansol, wasn’t this your idea? I’ve been waiting here for half an hour,” you grumble, voice jittery from the cold. Your hands were shoved into your pockets, and your scarf was pulled up above your nose to protect yourself from the frigid December air.

“Sorry,” he smiles sheepishly, “I went to see if I could get my hands on some hot chocolate for us, but the nearest store was closed, so…I had to walk a little farther.” He hands you a hot cup, which you immediately reach for to warm up your hands, “Forgive me?”

“Fine, fine,” You mutter and drink the cocoa, delighting in its warmth, “So what’s up today? Why did you tell me to come out at 11pm at the park when it’s below freezing? It’s technically not even open right now.”

“I felt like doing some stargazing tonight,” Hansol explains between sips, “With you.”

You nearly choke, but you catch yourself in time. “A-alright, where are we going to watch it?”

“Follow me.”

After a five minute walk, Hansol stops and lays out the blanket he had been carrying under his arm. The spot is a little overhang, partially obscured by trees so that it was unlikely that people would have been able to discover it. Here, the sky seemed to stretch on for miles and miles, and you had a view of the city, lit by the lights of towers and buildings. You and Hansol sit down, side by side, in a comfortable silence as you enjoy the sight around you, with another blanket wrapped around you two.

He speaks first, “The boys and I were playing soccer one day when Hoshi kicked the ball to hard and it ended up here. We thought it was just a shady looking wooded area, so we played rock paper scissors to see who had to get it, and I lost. I ended up finding this place though. I didn’t tell them I found it because it felt like my little secret…but I felt like I had to share it.”

You didn’t even have a chance to say anything when he started talking again. “Again, sorry it’s so cold today. But isn’t the scenery beautiful?”

Looking at the alluring sapphire sky, without a cloud in the sky, twinkling with stars, moon shining brightly, you’re drawn in, getting pulled in the more you look at it. You tear your attention away from it and glance at Hansol, and then, you’re even more awestruck.

His eyes were shining, basked in the moonlit night, brighter than the stars, and full of fascination as he gazed forward. Quietly, you mutter, “Yeah, it really is.”

You two sit together for a while and finish your hot chocolates until he speaks up, “Do you see the constellations?”

“Uh, not really no. I’ve never really…stargazed before.”

“Well, right over there is Gemini, you see? The one that looks kinda like a U.”

You scan the sky, looking in the general direction Hansol’s pointing, but nothing really sticks out to you. “I don’t see it.”

“Hmm…” He’s suddenly right next to you, arm linked with yours and chin on your shoulder, “Over there,” he says, tilting your face towards where he was pointing to before.

His hands are still warm, you note, even though it’s cold. Your eyes look straight ahead, and you can barely make out the faint outline of a U-shaped constellation. “Oh, I can see it now!”

“Yeah, and right next to it, if you look closely, you can see Orion. See those three really bright stars next to each other? That’s his belt.”

You shift your sights slightly and you see that constellation as well. “It’s pretty,” you comment, but your mind starts to think about something other than stars. “But why did you ask me to come with you? Wonwoo would probably know more about stars and stuff than I would. Not that I’m not enjoying this or anything, but don’t you feel like you’re talking to a dud?”

“Of course not. I wanted to do this with you because this is special to me, and you’re also special to me. You’re my closest friend, you know.”

“Aw, so you like me better than Seungkwan?” You joke and nudge him with your elbow.

He nudges you back, grinning from ear to ear, “Yeah, don’t tell him that. He’d be pissed.”

“He’d be like, ‘Woww, after all I’ve done for you, this is how you treat me? Unbelievable.’” You both burst into laughter after your impersonation of Seungkwan.

“Oh my God, if he heard you, we’d be dead meat.”

“We won’t die if you don’t tell him.”

“Fair point.” Hansol laughs, then leans his head against you again. “Honestly though, if I were to date any girl, it’d totally be you.”

You jolt and push him away immediately, “Where the hell did that come from?” You thank God that it was dark, otherwise Hansol would’ve been able to see how much your cheeks were flushed.

“Just a thought. But dude, we’d be unstoppable. We’d even be able to defeat Seungkwan and–wait, Y/N look! A shooting star!” You turn your head to the sky, and a dazzling white streak of light shoots by, leaving a thin trail in its stead.

“Don’t forget to make a wish,” Hansol says, closing his eyes, and you do the same, your own wish said in your mind:

I wish we could stay just like this.

Can time stop for me, just this once, for this moment?

“Y/N? Open the door, I know you’re in here.”

The dull pounding of the door (and your head) wakes you up. Somehow, you’d fallen asleep while watching the movie, and you look at the time on your laptop. It’s late morning, but already, your stomach goes sick with dread.

Don’t open the door. You tell yourself, however, you somehow find yourself walking towards the door and opening it.

Hansol stands there, looking handsome as always, but his eyes are lined with dark circles. Your heart twists looking at him, but you stand your ground and shift your eyes away.

“Are you okay? You haven’t replied to my texts or picked up my calls…I’ve been so worried. I kept coming here to check on you but you wouldn’t open the door. You looked pretty sick last time I saw you.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not. No one’s seen you for four days. I even asked your RA to check up on you, but she said you didn’t want to see anyone. What’s wrong?”

“Listen, nothing’s wrong. And even if there was something wrong, why do you care?” You spat, venom already welling up in your voice.

“Why do I care? You’re my best friend, Y/N, of course I would care.” He moves forward, as if he was going to brush the hair out of your face, but you step back. He sighs.

“You’ve been so distant from me lately. Whenever there was something wrong, I’d always come to you, and you’d always talk to me as well. I’ve known you for so long, I know that something’s wrong. Why…” His voice breaks, and you make eye contact with him, right away seeing frustration, hurt, and sadness. “Why have you been avoiding me?”

“I haven’t been avoiding you–”

“Yes you have! I didn’t say anything last time since I was happy you even came out, but…did I do something? Did I fuck up?”

You feel horrible instantly, “No, no it isn’t your fault…I just…” You take a huge breath and clench your hands into fists. “If you really want to know, I’ll tell you.”

“Of course I want to know! Tell me, I promise I won’t judge. I’ll listen.”

“Okay I…” Your heart is pounding faster than a drum, and you feel sick to your stomach. Your breaths are shaky and uneven when they come out, and you look him in the eye again before you say it.

“Remember when you said that if you were to date any girl, it would be me?”

Hansol nods slowly, yes, he remembers. “What about it?”

“That doesn’t stand anymore, does it?” You state, already knowing the answer. His eyes hold onto yours, amber and golden, in confusion, not quite knowing where this was going. You don’t even wait for him to confirm it, and, trembling, you are finally able to utter the words that you regret not saying before.

“I like you.”

There’s a beat of silence, and you glue your eyes to the floor. Your eyes are already burning, and you’re telling yourself no, no, don’t cry. Not in front of him.

“What?” He’s stunned, eyes blown wide, and mouth agape. You see so many things flash through his face, shock, guilt, and maybe even sadness. “Y/N–”

“I’m sorry,” You’re shaking like a leaf now, unable to hold back your emotions, “but I don’t think I’ll be able to see you anymore.”

And with that, you shut the door and break down into sobs, wishing that things had turned out differently.

#seventeen scenarios #hansol #vernon #vernon scenarios #seventeen #Anonymous #requests #fanfic: hansol #I'M BACK GUYS sorta buT THIS....may or may not be more than one year overdue.....#i'll try to write more often i'm sorry #i feel like my writing is starting to sound more like im writing a school paper asdifjklasdf #also this is the longest oneshot ive written im :’)

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yeaharrys · 7 years

Text

Finding Finley / Chapter Three

“Oh Finley, when was the last time you seriously dated someone? You’re almost 24, I’m just trying to jump start something!”

“Wow, I didn’t know being 23 and single is a crime now.”

For Finley O'Connor, love comes second, much to her mother’s dismay. For Harry Styles, life couldn’t revolve without love. When the pair are set up on a blind date, they make a pact to help each other get the thing that is apparently missing from their lives. But how long will it take for them to realise what truly is missing?

A story about being 23, blind dates, and finding who you truly are.

read on wattpad or read on tumblr

Chapter Three: The Friend Request

Saturday mornings were my favourite. It was my one of my only chances of being completely alone in my flat and therefore one of my only chances of solitude. So, despite the fact that I rolled into bed in a drunken state not long after midnight after walking home from the station, I still forced my tired self out of bed when my alarm chirped at 7am.

In theory, having a flatmate seems like an awesome idea. You have someone to split rent and bills costs, someone to help with the household chores, someone to come home to. In practice, however, it's not so simple. Alice was my flatmate, and calling her intense would be putting it lightly. I found her advertisement for a flatmate in the local paper and on a whim decided to follow up on it. The flat was great, good location and spacious. I signed on to the one year lease with her almost immediately. This is something I would come to regret in the following weeks.

Alice was a clean freak. A no-food-in-the-bedroom, no-drinks-without-a-coaster, no-items-in-the-cupboard-without-a-label type of clean freak. And while it was endearing at first, five months later and I was almost always on edge when I was at home. One thing out of place, and Alice would be shooting me daggers and making my life all that much crappier for the rest of the week. So, that's why I came to cherish Saturday mornings. Alice always worked the Saturday morning shift at one of the local cafés so that meant I had until 12pm to relax around the flat before going to hole myself up in my room for the rest of the week, the only relatively Alice-free zone.

I shuffled into the immaculately clean kitchen and grabbed the loaf of sliced bread from the freezer (labelled WHOLEGRAIN, EXP: 18 SEP 2017) and threw two pieces into the toaster before boiling some water. A good cup of tea would immediately scrub the hazy state my mind was currently in. Whilst I wasn't hungover, the shots last night meant I woke up with a small ache in the back of my head. The lack of sleep probably didn't help either.

Once my tea was sufficiently brewed and my toast coated in peanut butter (EXP: 11 JAN 2018), I settled myself on the lounge and pulled up my laptop. The real reason I loved Saturday mornings so much was that it was one of my only peaceful, distraction-free times to write. Script writing to be specific. It started as a topic of interest when I began to expand my film watching horizons as a teen, and three elective classes at uni later had me hooked. I was completely enamoured with the fact that every great movie started with a great script. Whilst it was just a hobby, I couldn't help but love crafting and blocking out scenes of my wildest imaginations. And whilst writing had become an important part of my life, I preferred to keep my hobby on the down low. This made those few hours of being home alone all that more precious. These past few weeks I had been re-working my own version of How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. After spending a lonely Friday night watching it on Netflix I was struck with inspiration and decided to take the characters into my own hands.

Whilst munching on my toast, I clicked through and deleted any unimportant emails, checked my iMessage as I couldn't be bothered getting my phone from my bedside table and logged onto Facebook. I made it a point to check my social media, mainly as my mum insisted on tagging me in as many posts as possible and if I didn't promptly reply I would have a phone call from her asking why I was ignoring her.

This morning there was only 2 notifications. And, to my surprise, a friend request. I clicked on the illuminated red (1) and audibly laughed when I saw who it was. Harry Styles. I pressed accept without hesitation, and against better judgement, clicked onto his profile.

I caught myself smiling as his full profile loaded up. His profile picture featured him grinning cheekily at the camera, his arm thrown around a boy with blonde hair who was gripping a pint of beer. I scrolled down his page, various photos and posts littering his wall. I saw the same three or four faces cropping up with Harry, it definitely looked like he had a close knit group of friends.

I had scrolled all the way back to 2014 when I saw a picture of Harry with a girl. A quick glance at who was tagged confirmed that it was Isabel. Gorgeous was an understatement. Her hair, a light shade of brown with a perfect amount of golden highlights, was cascading down over one of her shoulders. She was wearing a simple red dress, but on her it looked tailor made. It was a candid shot, both of them looking into each others eyes with their faces split into laughing grins. You could feel the love radiating from them both just from looking at the photo. It was almost hard to believe that two years later they would be broken up.

I was just about to close the tab when a message box popped up at the bottom of the page. I almost spilt my tea when I saw who it was, like he knew I had just spent the past 20 minutes thoroughly combing through his Facebook profile.

Harry Styles: well hello there, early riser

I chuckled to myself, my fingers hovering over the keys as I formulated a response.

Finley O'Connor: hello stranger. same can be said to you, i'm surprised you are awake after all those shots

Harry Styles: you may be shocked to hear that i can actually handle my alcohol

Harry Styles: i was almost afraid you weren't going to accept my friend request

Finley O'Connor: i'll be honest, i almost didn't accept based on the fact that you had already found my profile without me even telling you my full name last night. stalker abilities on point?

Harry Styles: hahahaha

Harry Styles: i will also be honest, i knew your last name before we even met last night. your aunty basically gave my mum your birth certificate lol

Harry Styles: i also may have stalked you on fb before last night. felt like i shouldnt add you until i met you though, didn't want to be a creep

Finley O'Connor: ah, so that's how you knew who i was when i walked in last night. creep status has definitely achieved

Harry Styles: oh don't act like you havent just been stalking my profile

Harry Styles: i know i have on yours. did you enjoy tea at the langham last month?

I laughed. At least I felt a little better about my shameless Facebook stalking.

Finley O'Connor: omg

Finley O'Connor: how do i block people on facebook???

Finley O'Connor: just kidding. i scrolled back to 2014 so beat that

I decided to move from the lounge to my favourite writing spot, the dining table. At this time of the morning, the sun was always at the perfect angle to warm my back as I typed away. I settled into the chair, opening up the Word Doc containing my work in progress. Before I could type a word though, the Facebook message tone blipped.

Harry Styles: find anything interesting?

I contemplated for a moment whether I should mention the Isabel photo. Considering how candid Harry ended up being about his relationship last night, I figured it wasn't unapproachable territory.

Finley O'Connor: yes, actually. an old photo of you and isabel

I stared expectantly at the small chat box, waiting for the dots to appear to signify he was responding. The seconds ticked by and I began chewing my lip. Perhaps a wrong move? I clicked back to my half written script, trying not to fixate on something so small. However, when the message tone pinged again a couple minutes later, I scrambled to click back to the page.

Harry Styles: yeah there's still a few photos scattered through there, ones she hasn't deleted yet anyways

I didn't know how to respond. I could sense it was still a touchy subject, not that I blamed him. But, he ended up responding for me.

Harry Styles: speaking of....

Harry Styles: we're you serious about what you suggested last night? i know we were both a little tipsy...

I raised my eyebrows. I had forgotten about the drunken pact we had made on the Croydon platform late last night. I actually had some second-hand embarrassment from the idea I had hatched, why did I even think it was a good idea?

Finley O'Connor: oh that pact thing? we don't actually have to do that lol. just a bit of a laugh you know

Harry Styles: what?? no i already have someone in mind to set you up with

Now it was my turn to delay a response. Was he being serious? Was this something I should actually involve myself into? I mean, I had met Harry once and all of the sudden I'm supposed to trust his taste in men for me? And on top of that, he's supposed to trust me to help him win back his ex-girlfriend? I was half-wishing I could've just kept my drunken mouth shut last night.

Harry Styles: hello?? fin?????

Finley O'Connor: i mean.... if you're really serious about it, then sure

I hoped I wasn't going to live to regret this.

Harry Styles: brilliant

Harry Styles: wanna grab a coffee? discuss logistics??

My eyes flickered over to the time displayed in the top left hand corner of my laptop. It had just ticked past 8am, meaning I had 4 hours of non-Alice time ahead of me. Coffee would cut into that. I sighed as I clicked back over to my half-written script, my eyes skimming over the last few lines I had typed out. I guess I could miss my writing session for one week.

Finley O'Connor: have somewhere in mind?

apologies for a short chapter, i decided to split it up, hopefully this wasn’t too boring for you?? let me know your thoughts! thanks for reading :)

#1dff #1dffupdates #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #one direction #harry styles #finding finley

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