passiveagressiveunicorn

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

occasional posts from users

#rip tumblr users

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

guys I've been assigned two tasks at once ,please pray for me

#this is how i approach uni

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

"this post would do numbers on tumblr" "that post would do numbers on tumblr" yeah they probably would. they would probably do 4 or some shit. i don't know

#oh haiku bot #you make already hilarious things even funnier

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

im laughing so hard because no matter what song you listen to 

spiderman dances to the beat

no matter what song ive been testing it and lauing my ass off for an hour

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

the fact that op turned off rbs is very very funny to me. anyway i want this post on my blog too.

#lmao #me??

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

everyone living in EU - please support the citizens initiative for safe and accessible abortion!!

#important

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

My friend, making me watch doctor who for the first time: *Starts with the Pompeii episode with Donna and the Doctor because he knows im a history nerd and so must like the kinda fanciful adaptions of historical events*

Me, the wrong kind of history nerd: Why are there aliens in my volcano?

Him: This is an alien show

Me, more distressed: THATS NOT- GET OUT OF MY VOLCANO!?

Him: The *Doctor* is an alien

Me: Great! He needs to get out of my volcano too. So does the lady. She seems like fun but could everyone please remove themselves from my volcano please

Him: Alright this isnt working

Me: I really don't know what you expected, i greet new people by telling them about Lichtenstein's army

Him: ...

Him: *puts on a different episode*

#doctor who #aliens #pompeii #donna noble #history #yes im a nerd #yes i did like the next episode far more #there weren't any major historical events being invaded by aliens #Proposal: the 81st guy in the lichtenstein army was secretly just the doctor who was bored #there #thats the episode id like to see #Lichtenstein

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

My cats have this meow that means "please come with me to fix this" after which they'll lead me to the problem in question, usually a empty (or 'empty') food bowl or a closed door they want open. They look at the 'problem', they look back at me, clear message.

What fascinates me is how this illustrates what they percieve as being in the realm of my 'power.' I control the food, I control the door, sure, but my cats love to sit on the balcony in the sun, and it has happened plenty of times that on a rainy day they come get me, go to the balcony and show me... the rain. "Please fix this" they say. "Please get rid of the wet"

"Silly kitty," I say, "I can't control the rain." I then walk into the shower and turn on the rain.

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

As a person living in australia, who has been living in australia for 8 years now

Mood

I never see it coming

You would think one of my best friends being Australian the accent wouldn't catch me off guard so dramatically

But I'm never ready for the Australian accent to come out of someone

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

best brownies in the known universe (at least, according to my grandma)

some year and a half ago when i was getting ready to move out i combed through all the family recipes that lay lost to time and one of the ones that i found was my grandmas brownie recipe. idk where she got it from (nor can i ask cause she has dementia) and its a printed out email she sent to my mom in june 2000. but by george these the best brownies i have ever tasted. would she be pleased that i am sharing this recipe with my vast following? absolutely.

YOU WILL NEED:

5 tablespoons butter (unsalted) 1 ounce unsweetened baking chocolate (or as much as your heart desires) 2/3 cup unsweetened good cocoa powder 1 cup sugar (white) (superfine preferred, normal works fine) 1 cup sifted white flour (can use gluten free) 1/2 teaspoon baking powder as much cinnamon as your heart desires (your heart needs to desire at least some cinnamon. its essential to the recipe) 3 egg whites 1 egg splash of vanilla extract (again, non negotiable step!)

preheat your oven to 325 degrees. grease a square baking pan (9x9 preferably).

in a small saucepan over medium heat melt the butter and baking chocolate. while that is melting, sift together the flour, baking powder and cinnamon into a small bowl. once the butter and chocolate is done melting add the cocoa powder and cook it together for 1 minute. add in the sugar and stir. it will get very thick. this is correct.

set that aside to cool. while thats cooling take a large bowl and put in your egg whites, egg and vanilla. beat it up with preferably a whisk but you can use a fork if youre fresh out of whisks. once the chocolate is cool enough to not scramble your eggs dump it in the eggs and mix it together. add the flour in gradually and keep mixing until its smooth and happy.

spread into your greased baking pan. put it in the oven for EXACLTLY 18 MINUTES. very crucial step. they will come out slightly under done. that is what we want. as they cool they will continue to cook in the pan. we dont want them to get hard and sad. they are not good when they are hard and sad. do not overbake them. you will be sad.

slice them up and as the official last step on the original recipe says: EAT ENJOY AND MAKE MORE! (theyre very good with mint chocolate chip ice cream)

#keeping that #for future reference

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

internet friends are kinda like illegally downloaded friends. you don’t get the physical copy but you still get all the great content

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

Works in Progress

Snuffles & Son - Sirius raises Harry and opens a shop that specializes in repairing cursed artifacts and places protection wards on family heirlooms. One day, an Unspeakable from the Department of Mysteries walks in with a cursed artifact from his cousin's confiscated Gringotts vault, requesting Sirius's assistance.

Rage Against The Dying Of The Light - In a universe where James and Lily Potter survive Voldemort's attack on Halloween night. Most of wizarding society is enjoying newfound peace after a decade of war, except the young heroes who fought the war learn you can never really go back to the way things were before

Be Not Afraid Of Greatness - A collection of Frank Longbottom stories

completed fics and one-shots under the cut

Marauder's Era/Jily

Unresolved Questions Of Wizard Cosmology - Ten-year-old Sirius and his father take a trip to the British Magical Observatory.

Those Whom The Gods Love Die Young - Once upon a time, four boys entered an ancient magical forest in Scotland. They loved life, the forest, and each other very much. Together, they become beasts of the woods and grow to understand the forest more than anyone else who had entered the magical realm before them.

Tree Cutting - Every Gryffindor in the tower heard Walburga's howler calling Sirius a filthy traitor. Lily knows what it feels like when someone you love calls you nasty names.

Career Advice with James F. Potter - Lily Evans is stressed about her career advice meeting but luckily James Potter is willing to share his expert advice on the matter.

A Decent Bloke - In the Hogwarts library, James Potter eats an apple while Lily Evans works on a History of Magic essay.

Perspective - Lily asks James about the Sacred Twenty-Eight. Lily also learns how soft James Potter's hands are.

Light Is The Most Glorious - James takes Lily on a journey around Hogwarts the night before the Christmas holidays.

Does Permanent Mean Forever? - It is James Potter's seventeenth birthday, and to commemorate the occasion, he proposes to the gang that they go out and get tattooed.

Your Friend, James - It is the summer before their 7th year, and Lily and James spend the entire holiday writing letters to each other as their relationship slowly changes from friends to something more.

Rumor Has It  - Severus doesn't believe the rumors that Lily finally agreed to go out with James Potter.

A Happy Thought - The 7th-year Defense Against the Dark Arts Class learns the Patronus Charm. James is shocked to learn what Lily's Patronus is.

A Promise - James sees no problem that they are only seventeen and have yet to meet each other's parents.

Hold On To The Memories, They Will Hold On To You - Lily Evans is ready to spend New Year's Eve alone in her bedroom until James Potter flies in and offers her a midnight ride.

A Miraculous Christmas Moment - A married Lily and James Potter wander around a London Christmas Market. James misses celebrating Christmas in Godric's Hollow.

Comfort and Joy - Baby Harry helps James decorate the Christmas Tree.

Querencia - The time Lily, James, and Harry spent as a family in their little house in the West Country was far too brief, but it was overfilled with love, laughter, and, above all, life.

Jily Challenge Fics

Three Lemons and a Dragon - Once upon a time there lived a Prince named James who had to save his father's Kingdom by getting married. One day an older woman gifts him three lemons that will lead him to his true love.

Erasmus Lovegoods’s Guide to Brewing Love Potions -At the start of every school year, the Ministry of Magic distributed leaflets to all students taking potions classes regarding the regulations and legality of highly controlled potions.

I'll Meet You After Dark - An Alternate Universe where the Statute of Secrecy hasn't been enacted yet. Tensions between the magical and non-magical communities are high.

Lighting Era

Goodbyes and Surprise Greetings - Ginny's brothers have abandoned her at the Burrow while they go to school or leave the country. But then she gets a surprise visitor.

The Past is a Bucket of Ash - Over burnt photographs, Harry had a late-night chat with Sirius about his family history.

The Parting Glass - The last full moon, Moony and Padfoot spend together.

Next Gen

We're Going On A Hippogriff Hunt -Two young boys go on a hippogriff hunt in the woods behind their house. Teddy hopes James doesn't figure out he knows nothing about hippogriffs.

Am I To Suffer This Constant Stream of Interruption? - Teddy Lupin and Victoire Weasley go on their first official date. James Sirius Potter is now a third-year at Hogwarts and is able to visit the village.

A Wonderful Idea - Vic planned a very grown-up date for her and Teddy. Too bad Teddy can't ice skate.

It's All About The Timing - James Sirius Potter has wanted to ask Ellie Longbottom out since he was twelve years old. Unfortunately, he can never get the timing right.

Know Your Roots - Albus Potter is unsure if helping Uncle Neville repot moonwort plants is part of detention or a lame attempt at godfather and godson bonding. It might be both.

#for later

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

they’re called boops but i think it’s better as lil baps

bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap ba

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

#mental health #coping

[passiveagressiveunicorn]

If jily has a million lovers, I am one of them.

If jily has one lover, it’s me.

If jily had no lovers, I am dead.

#jily #i love them

[passiveagressiveunicorn]