irisesand

[irisesand]

‘Love is the one thing that we’re capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space.’

“Eulogy from a Physicist” by Aaron Freeman, with quotes from Interstellar by Christopher Nolan, and images from NASA, Interstellar, Getty, Petrichara, and Reuters.

1- NASA: GOODS-South.

2- NASA: NGC 1850.

3- NASA: Iberian Peninsula.

4- Christopher Nolan: Interstellar.

5- NASA: From the Earth to the Moon.

6- Hannah La Folette Ryan: Subway Hands.

7- Adams Evans: Heart Nebula.

8- NASA: Exploring the Antennae.

9- NASA: Crescent Moon from the International Space Station.

10- Petrichara.

11- Getty Images.

12- NASA: SMACS 0723.

13- Reuters

[irisesand]

[irisesand]

we all are small particles holding very tightly together in a very large universe ✧

@visual-scape (x) / @hillergoodspeed (x) / the umbrella academy (2019-); s2e5 "valhalla" / project hail mary, andy weir / @vhspositive (x) / dogfish, mary oliver [art: @heavensghost (x)] / the overview effect: awe and self-transcendent experience in space flight, david bryce yaden et al. / jz (jzcreativespace) (x) / x / minecraft end poem, julian gough / 8bitfiction (twitter) (x) / pale blue dot: a vision of the human future in space, carl sagan / @morepeachyogurt / prubton (boldomatic) (x)

[irisesand]

do you ever laugh with your friends and think oh this is the point. this is the point of everything

[irisesand]

my love language is the small things... you tell me your favourite thing once, I will remember it until I die. I will ask you how you are everytime I speak to you because emotions change frequently and I need to know you are good and happy. I will post you on my account to make you feel loved and important because you being on my account is important to me, you need to know I love you. If I know you like something or you do a particular thing really well, I will tell you that I did that thing too because in my mind, that's "your" thing, I have to let you know I watched your favourite movie or listened to your favorite song or made artwork bc I know you like art. I need you to know I love you in big ways and small.

#sou's #on love #the human condition #julypassed #words words words #love #on friendship #20's #life

[irisesand]

learning lately that a lot of confidence is about owning up. like "yeah i'm a little addicted to my phone right now" or "yeah i'm not really over this person yet" or "yeah i still get pretty anxious in crowds" just saying anything at all but then following it up w "but i'm trying to get better" and being super nonchalant and unaffected. so powerful. you would literally be undefeatable in the face of even the most judgmental person. no one can judge you for things you already know about yourself and are trying to improve on. the trick is to know yourself from the inside out, to hold yourself accountable, and to actively improve every day. like that is literally the secret to never feeling like you're at the mercy of somebody else's judgment

[irisesand]

Like I've been so upset thinking about the quote "always the poet, never the poem." It absolutely demolished me. I was thinking of how romantic it would be to have a partner who loves and writes poetry until... I realised that I am that but someone else. Idk if my logic makes sense but it's comforting to know that I am something that I desperately desire.

I am the poet, I am the partner that loves poems, I am the partner that writes poems. And while I wish I was the poet so bad; God, I must be so so romantic.

Don't you think it's so romantic to have a partner that writes poetry?

#sou's #on love #the human condition #julypassed #on being a women #love #romance #romantic #always the poet never the poem #poetry #poems #poets #words words words

[irisesand]

Don't you think it's so romantic to have a partner that writes poetry?

#sou's #on love #the human condition #julypassed #on being a women #words words words #romantic #romance #always the poet never the poem

[irisesand]

female rage is when someone does something hurtful or disrespectful to you but instead of see it how it is, you justify their actions because they've brushed past it and pretend they did nothing wrong so seeing that you gaslight yourself that nothing happened. and when you tell your friend what happened and they're baffled and tell you that you were justified to feel the way you did and then you just feel stupid and angry

#sou's #the human condition #on being a women #female rage #why do we do this

[irisesand]

I was thinking how of all the ways society has wronged women... I feel like you can see the effects the patriachy has had on women just by looking at them. some despise men for their history of wrongdoings against women; some hate them because they've been wronged by them; some are afraid of them; some don't know how to talk to them; some automatically feel inferior to them; some are breaking through that glass ceiling just to sit alongside them face-to-face, human-to-human; some crave their validation; some uphold the gates of the patriachy. I'm definitely not saying women only act for men... I'm just saying alot of women are effected alot by the grips of the patriachy, it feels like a thick coat of tar surrounding us, trapping us in a bubble, we don't know how to exist around them, we don't know how to be around them because they make it hard for us. It's not easy, and I just... love women so much. I love women, I feel so horrible for all the things we go through, old and young. but we always find beauty in our existence.

#sou's #on love #the human condition #julypassed #on being a women #beautiful women

[irisesand]

i. it's not quite a poem; but saturday was the first day my family saw me in a binder. this includes my extremely catholic deacon of a father. ii. the weird thing about binders is that they make me feel like more of a girl. a better, mirrored version of a girl. i joke with my friends - how the fuck am i gonna explain that to a republican. maybe it's like color theory, i guess (children's hospital notwithstanding). when i wear a dress, i am frequently, vividly - disco-ball spinning and glitter lights - a boy. a boy in a dress. i look in the mirror and i'm like - what the fuck is this?

iii. i had never actually planned to come out. for ten years i only told, like, 5 people; most of whom were my partners. i'm not, like, shy or embarrassed about it - it just wasn't something i felt like i needed to share, really. i kind of feel my gender like. a favorite sweater. you can't really control what your favorite sweater is going to be. it's just like, this is the sweater that's comfy and cozy and you get compliments on so you wear it a lot. half the time you don't even realize it is your favorite unless someone else is like - oh, you're wearing your favorite sweater today, i love that one on you. and that little starburst of gratitude you feel when people care enough to notice this tiny thing about you - like that, i guess. maybe.

iv. i was outed 2 years ago by someone i considered to be a friend. what's wild is that she and i are no longer talking because of something completely unrelated. when i asked her what the fuck she was thinking, she said: you'll see. it's better this way.

v. there are ways it's better. i'll give her that much. i was never, like, hiding it, and all pronouns are fine for me, so it's not like i changed a whole lot. but it was nice; the gentle way people supported me. my best friend asking if i'd feel better in a suit at her wedding, even though i know it would have thrown off the pictures. nick asking me if i want to come along on guy-night pub crawls. plus, like, being in a very beautiful community. it doesn't seem like a lot - but in my adulthood, i've really figured out that life is genuinely and truly about the small things. vi. my father was pretty mad about the gay thing, but lately he's been really really hoping my '"i'm 10% straight in case of emergency" joke is - you know, not a joke. i'm never going to tell him about my gender. sometimes my gender has his ghost in it. i put on the suit and the binder and i'm like that's a possum in a costume. my gender is crying in another room, she couldn't make it to this conversation. plus, she's currently a dude.

vii. at the same time. my mother didn't want to make me upset in case it was a sensitive topic so she asked my sister about it, who asked me. the other day my mom gently corrected my father; using they/them (for the first time!) just-casually, as if she had been practicing - "hang on, i want to hear what they were saying." this woman was raised by irish catholics who didn't allow elbows on the table; much less fruity little troublemakers. my mother went to the library and got herself a bunch of books to learn more about being genderfluid, even though i never asked her to. as the saying goes - those that want to, do.

viii. i don't think i'll ever, like, "look" nonbinary. i know, i know, i know. there's no way to look nonbinary, and we both know i've done the reading and gotten the fancy degree about this. but when i was like 25 someone was measuring me for a costume and said - holy shit you have the same measurements as marilyn monroe except like. dude you're shorter and your waist is smaller. girls are probably killing themselves to look like you. and here's the thing - i know it was meant as a compliment. i know that. but i really, really, really wish i hadn't heard that. because my body is - and probably always will be - extremely, horrifically. feminine.

ix. and at the same time. it's not a poem, but on saturday my family saw me in a binder for the first time, and they were smiling. my sister cocked her head to the side. "it's good, actually. it's not that you look different. it's just like. a better view." she bit off a part of her fry before pointing the rest at me. "i don't know how to describe this, but ... you look more like you."

[irisesand]

love is!!!! making soup for ur lover just to make sure they’re feeling warm inside!!! taking their hands between yours and gently rubbing them because they’re cold!!! peeling a clementine and giving it to them!!! sharing ur small random thoughts about the world with them and getting excited to hear theirs!!!

[irisesand]

#cinema therapy #a monster calls #the shared nucleus of emotion #i am devastated #i cried like a baby watching this episode #my lord

[irisesand]

2023

COLLECT PHYSICAL MEDIA

SAVE RECEIPTS AS ROOM DECOR

READ AND REREAD AND REREAD AND REREAD

LOSE YOUR PHONE

ORANGE

LOSE AMBITION

KILL THE SHAME MAN

DANCE IN THE KITCHEN

WINE AND ESSAYS

BUSES ARE ALIVE

[irisesand]

this thread is still going on twitter

#oh my god #this is so adorable #and sweet #this is SO cool #wtf #very sweet #i love this so much #i love doggies #i want to do this too

[irisesand]

#van gogh #vincent van gogh #the reason i still exist

[irisesand]

Lately, I've been searching for YouTube videos of people talking about their loneliness. Because if there's one thing that I can never understand about life; it's loneliness. No one in the world has ever prepared me for it and I keep feeling like I'm getting buried alive in it.

I think I have made so many tumblr posts that speak specifically about loneliness. Each time I do, it just rings harsher and truer than the last time I did. I genuinely don't get it, I don't get how loneliness can exist in a world full of billions of people. And I don't understand how people can exist with it. How do people exist without people in their lives? How do people get to the place in their life that even though loneliness crushes their existence, they still rise up each day and continue to live the life society makes for them? How does no one ever tell you about heartbreaking loneliness can be?

Watching these videos of people talking about how they're whatever age with no friends makes me realize that loneliness is an epidemic that no one can survive. It's so horrifyingly comforting for me to know that because I thought I was the only one and I'm not but my lord, I feel heartbroken for the people that feel this way too.

Loneliness is such a conundrum. It makes me feels like I'm drowning in water, and I can't seem to get to safety. I keep bobbing in and out of the water trying to grasp onto any air that I can push down my lungs. I'm being sucked and sucked, like a vacuum in my lung, and all I can feel is the dread of death but waiting for the exact thing.

#just another post on loneliness #sometimes it just hits me so hard #i just watched a girl crying her eyes out on youtube because she realized she doesnt have any friends #girl in the blue dress #i never related more to anything in my whole life #my exam is tomorrow but this is all im consumed with #my therapist wont be available until december either so i have to use tumblr to vent i guess #on love #sou's #the human condition #julypassed #loneliness