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incorrectyj · 3 years
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wally: when i get shot, do i own the bullet? like, can i keep it?
artemis: why on earth would you want to keep it?
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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wally: ten things i hate but for some reason my girlfriend loves
wally: starting off the list: me
artemis:
artemis: babe we’ve talked about this
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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conner: i had a terrible dream. a monkey was in it.
dinah: and?
conner: what do you mean, “and”?
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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dick: music is just wiggling air
conner: don’t do this. don’t do this to me today
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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artemis: dad’s in town.
dick: your dad?
artemis: no, your dad. he’s back from the grave.
dick: my dad would be less scary.
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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zatanna: i’ve created a map of all the possible places where they could’ve taken conner
dick: this... this is a map of the world
zatanna, crying: i have no idea where the fuck he is
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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[during a covert mission]
kaldur, on the mind link: don’t say a word.
wally, whispering: fergalicious.
kaldur, on the mind link: i just said no words.
wally, on the mind link: oh, i see. two weeks ago playing scrabble, it’s not a word, and now suddenly it’s a word because it’s convenient for you.
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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zatanna: are you a big spoon or a little spoon?
artemis: i’m a knife
wally, from another room: she’s the little spoon
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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dinah: and what do we say when our actions upset someone else?
artemis: hoes mad.
dinah: no.
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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roy: look at this team, kaldur.
roy: look at this team, and tell me with full confidence that these trainwrecks wouldn’t stick a fork in a socket if they had the chance.
kaldur: ...i’m not answering that.
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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dick: when i was small—
wally: [snorts] “was”
dick:
dick: okay you know what—
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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[at disneyland on the teacup ride]
kaldur, m’gann, and conner: [spinning calmly while talking]
dick, wally, artemis, and zatanna: [flying past them, spinning as fast as they can, screaming]
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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conner: we just ate, why are you making pancakes?
zatanna: they’re for wolf
conner: why are you making pancakes for wolf?
zatanna: because he doesn’t know how?
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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conner: hi, can i have two movie tickets please
movie clerk: for romeo and juliet?
conner: no, for m’gann and i
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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wally: you’ve heard of an elf on a shelf, now get ready for:
wally: [places a pot on artemis’ head] a thot in a pot
artemis:
artemis: [standing up] get ready for a bitch in a ditch because that's where they're gonna find your body you little fu—
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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[after an argument with the team]
m’gann: [handing out cookies to everyone]
m’gann: these were not made with love today, just so you know.
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incorrectyj · 3 years
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zatanna: is that blood
artemis: no?
zatanna: THAT’S NOT A QUESTION YOU ANSWER WITH ANOTHER QUESTION
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