hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

cont.

knives poke out of our backs

fumes fill our mouths

we're all the seven deadly sins rolled into one

we're all in the wrong here

#am writing #my writing #writers on tumblr #writers #writers creed

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

oct 13

Our laughters are hollowed out

looking like how our tired eyes would be

at the end of the day

when no one would be around to know that

we're not at all happy.

#my writing #am writing #writers creed #writers on tumblr #writing

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

Hi. Pls remember that you're an adult now. Remember to eat bc no one's gonna remember for you. EAT.

side effects include but not limited to : fucken headaches, shitty energy, H Y P E R A C I D I T Y, and many far more dangerous things had I kept at it so fuckin don't forget to eat. Pls. Tnx K. Bye

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

It’s unfortunate and I really wish I wouldn’t have to say this, but I really like human beings who have suffered. They’re kinder.

Emma Thompson (via quotemadness)

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[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

My solitude doesn’t depend on the presence or absence of people; on the contrary, I hate who steals my solitude without, in exchange, offering me true company.

Friedrich Nietzsche (via quotemadness)

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

I call this one 'If You've Heard of the Introvert's, Probs the Extrovert's; Then Wait For THis Ambivert Bitch to F u up'

I moved away from home for university. Here’s how it is so far:

I think the shower’s going to give me pneumonia one day. The light outside flicker like we’re in a horror movie set. But I slept like a coiled spring on my carboard bed and I timed the time I leave my dorm room so I get there just right when orientation starts, how I’m going to shower with the dying lightbulb in the bathroom isn’t exactly in my mind. Only that I didn’t take into account the long winding stairs. I didn’t know that the rain puddle that I’ll be stepping on was actually very deep enough to submerge your socks into a disgusting mixture of trash and gutter water. I trudged through the campus with noisy wet shoes and by the time I got there, there’s nothing in my mind but worry if they smell. I was not late but I was late enough that the awkwardness of introductions has ended enough for most to form their own separate little groups. My body’s stiff and it’s making all psychological textbook definitions of discomfort. I became a stoic rock who had forgotten the conversation starters that kept me up all night. It was very fun.

I broke down to the tune of Charles Bradley's Changes.

The next few days was a bit better. But I watched the motion with every bit of emotion and they stare back blank. I became angry of my little dorm room silent space that I had to fill with my own noise. It could be worse but I became a resentful ungrateful bitch. It didn’t help that I’m always hungry. I began to compare. I missed having a room where I could eat my food and not worry about cockroaches crawling for it right after. I lay in my bed thinking of something to distract me other than waiting for professors who don’t show up to their classes. I missed already having friends I didn’t have to audition for and impress. The thing about being an ambivert is that you’re okay with solitude for a while until prolonged exposure will make you question your sanity. It’s up there as one more weird classification in a spectrum that sounds like I’m making up, but we exist! And we’re in a grey area full of self-aware people in a perpetual torture of knowing every social imperfection, hounded into submission and at the same time going insane not finding the fucking right solution. I missed actually having someone to not only talk empty small talks with. I wanted hard hitting questions and existential conversations, anything to get rid of the bitter nothing taste in my mouth from a quiet resolve to not bother talking anymore. But it was not fair looking for that from old friends who have stopped existing beyond smiling people crowding camera rolls. They’ve left a long time ago. Reality and a different school calendar meant I’m only leaving now.

Now, it’s getting better. The fan’s dead but at least now we have wifi. I moved top bunk, dust allergies became less. I’m still a mess. I don’t have any new thoughts or advice to help. But maybe soon. I hope.

#writers on tumblr #my writing #am writing #writers creed #artists on tumblr #lol at my life

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

You know you’ve given up when you lose the fire in your eyes. It has turned from raging fire to ashes, and I’m coughing from the debris.

Brianna Pastor (via quotemadness)

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

I always wonder why birds stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth, then I ask myself the same question.

Harun Yahya (via quotemadness)

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]

L.M. Montgomery, Anne of the Island

[hi-wakemeupwhenthesemestere-blog]