hamletinhighheels

[hamletinhighheels]

I hate tiktoks tbh it's like I'm a fish watching Narcissus lean over my pond

[hamletinhighheels]

Pandora by Thomas Benjamin Kennington (1908)

[hamletinhighheels]

Adam Parrish to Shrike by Hozier 🍃

[hamletinhighheels]

Person: Your teeth are very nice!

Me: Thanks, for how much are you willing to buy them off? I've heard they can fetch a very good price on the teeth collector black market.

#meme

#memes #shitpost #chaotic academia #chaotic thoughts #funny

[hamletinhighheels]

THE RAVEN CYCLE

Many people talk about how they love Adam Parrish but I just wanna say: I absolutely love Gansey.

He’s like the greatest nerd and the biggest dork you can think of. He’s 17 and 50 at the same time. His personal style is horrible. His friends are magical creatures/trees/dead/200 years old professors/Henry Cheng.

He has notebooks full of useless stuff. He lives in an era of smartphones and still makes handwritten notes and snippets of newspapers. He built a miniaturized Henrietta - no normal person would do that.

He had one wild obsession and was ready to give everything including his life for it.

He drives an unpractical and ugly car just because he feels good with it (it’s like the equivalent of wearing t-shirts with superheroes on them).

He’s just such a nerd and I love him for it. And for the fact that he doesn’t even hide it. Even the judge is like “hey did you find your dead king?”, the whole school is like “ah yes the Glendower, Gansey’s bf”.

[hamletinhighheels]

everyday mood

[hamletinhighheels]

Resisting the feminine urge to say I love you to everyone I have a positive interaction with

[hamletinhighheels]

I’m told often that I’m loved, and I feel it from time to time. But I rarely ever think of myself as a lovable person.

It feels like “All the love in the world is useless”

And I can’t really remember what’s the point of a love that doesn’t understand depth ? what’s the point of love that chooses to be blind to the ugliness that defines me?

Whats the point of forcing my heavy steps; when they choose to step all over me ?

And “How can I trust in love? How can I trust in anything that can be so present one moment and so absent the next?”

i can’t just let them love me when it only please them…

So I highlight my own flaws With the colors of an iridescent sunset. too beautiful, For them to ever relate.

I’m waving a red flag But there is too many shades And they are busy Deciding what to name it.

Or maybe i was seen, but only on a surface level. Not enough to insure balance.

Cause i sense the insecurities of others, too easily for my own good. Then absorb it all, every tick, And body gesture. Memorize every detail like an actor waiting for the moment they will be in spotlight. And if they don’t put some effort on trying to see deeper than the show I put.. then all they’ll ever see is a projection.

so what does it mean when they say they “love me” ? Do they love the person that brings their own colors to life by being absent? Or is it the looming promise of my presence?

"if you love me, you don't love me in a way I understand."

•••

Quotes: Ingeborg Bachman/ Franz Kafka/ Beau Taplin Oscar Wilde/Albert Camus/richard siken

Paintings reference:

1. George Elgar Hicks - On the seashore (1879). 2. under his wings, daniel f. gerhartz. 3. The Pact, 2020, by Eliran Kantor. 4. Farewell, 1913 (fragment) – Arthur Hacker. 5. Stańczyk, 1862 – Jan Matejko. 6. Art by Hüseyin Özçelik

[hamletinhighheels]

“are you okay” no i annotate books for fun

[hamletinhighheels]

Guess I'm one of Jesus Lana's disciples now!

#lana del rey #lana is god #spotify wrapped

[hamletinhighheels]

March 2019

And that day that we'll watch the death of the sun

That the cloud and the cold and those jeans you have on

And you'll gaze unafraid as they sob from the city roofs

~Hozier, Wasteland Baby!

#abandoned #abandoned aesthetic #ruins #beautiful ruins #gothic #gothic aesthetic #dark academia #dark acadamia aesthetic #grunge #grunge aesthetic #gloomy #beautiful #abandoned home #istanbul #turkey #goth #taksim #city/town #2019 #spring #hozier #horror #pale aesthetic #wasteland #apocalypse