fireeaglespirit

[fireeaglespirit]

Thanks for all the replies, I haven’t been able to come back until now... 

But I’m definitely surviving. There’s a lot of problems still going on and I’m not having full access to internet due to circumstances (I’m staying in my relative’s house since they live near a bigger city) so it will take a while before everything comes back to normal, but I’m alive and thriving...

I solved two of my pains, at least... my kidney is clear apparently. Still a lot to go!

I’m trying to be as strong as possible, and glad to be able to take a peek here after so long.

Just wanna tell you, my friends, esp. @viviane-lefay & @beyond-far-horizons:

Keep reading

#personal

[fireeaglespirit]

#yin yang cats #for my cat loving people

[fireeaglespirit]

I love earwigs! They’re lovely animals and absolutely harmless... I hate the fact people think they’re dangerous due to the pincers.

I had the pleasure of watching one family of these closely and I even witnessed parental care two times. Extremely cute and unique.

There was one of those living in our bathroom and I used to notice her little pincers sticking out of the door hole she use as home. Every time someone opened the door it would run back to the little hole but I know they’re there, lol. Very smart insect. Sadly she died a few weeks ago but I interacted with her a few times, it was amazing seeing the behavior of this creature.

An ode for the adorable earwig! 

Aaah I didn't see that it was a repeat. Do you know any earwig fun facts?

Yes!

First, earwigs have magnificent angel wings they only rarely show:

These wings fold up in over 100 places to fit underneath the earwig’s very small and short elytra, the same “wing cases” (modified forewings) a beetle has…but they’re not related to beetles at all! They’re in their own group, the Dermaptera.

The wings are also sort of “spring loaded,” completely popping out on their own as soon as the earwig opens the cases. To fold them back inside, the earwig will actually use its own tail forceps to push each wing back up into the case.

Also, earwigs are very dutiful mothers, in a minority of insects that practice extended care of their babies:

She will guard over them like this and leave only to bring them food. If she senses too much trouble, she will pick each one up in her mouth and move them to a new nesting place, like a cat!

#insects #earwig

[fireeaglespirit]

Just wanna tell you, my friends, esp. @viviane-lefay & @beyond-far-horizons:

The reason I’m not talking much these days... is that I’m overwhelmingly sad. 

Its not depression, I have ‘tangible’ or physical reasons to be sad. Mostly because of my failing health, but a few days ago I had a very dense fight with my father, I don’t feel good about almost anything.. he has that effect to make me feel like a bag of trash, unwanted and a problem for everyone.

I really don’t know what to do with my life right now, I feel like looking onwards there’s only despair. I can’t bear to be confident or positive with the way things are right now, call me dramatic but this is it. No one has patience for my BS these days.

So I wanna protect you here from my bitterness. I feel like I’m having trouble keeping my mood in check. In the past, I have hurt people closest and dearest to me due to my bitter mood, in a similar situation... I’m mostly a very ‘peaceful’ and quiet person, but some of the things awaken a side of me I’m not very comfortable with. A deep rage, violent or destructive thoughts... 

I just get too much hatred going on right now in my mind, towards myself above all. Its not good... envy is also at play, a feeling that often seeps in and destroy my soul, I take care for it not to grow but its impossible for me to not feel like life is unfair in my current situation so I need to shut down from the world. I’m not even going out much, just for my exams.

I’m aware, at least, of my feelings. They have a root and cause, mostly things I have to change in my life if I ever wanna be ‘free’... 

To sum it up, you all here deserve the best and I don’t want to burden you too much with those problems. They come and go, as they did multiple times in the past, every time I went silent for weeks there was a reason. 

I know everyone has their problems, everyone struggles with their own ghosts and I don’t want to add up my own weight of negativity on you right now, so I had to drift away a bit as I always do to come back later. 

I hope one day I can retributed even a tiny fragment of the happiness you brought me, as it was in the past... when I used to do things and feel joy drawing, etc..

#personal #that's depresing af I know #that's why I avoid talking while I'm having a 'mood' #it goes away #and then I'm like #wtf why have I even wrote this #I always get ashamed afterwards for being so dramatic

[fireeaglespirit]

@beyond-far-horizons one esp. for for you and other writers

[fireeaglespirit]

one of the reasons this ending sucks so much is the implication of it

missandei dying in chains, the hound dying in fire, jamie going back to cersei, dany fulfilling a “mad targaryen” expectation

it’s like they’re saying “you can never escape your past, what you’ve been will always be what you are”

and thats a really really terrible message to be sending

#this exactly #got #got spoilers

[fireeaglespirit]

Me believing the final season of Game of Thrones was going to end with intact character arcs and good storytelling and satisfying conclusions for all:

[fireeaglespirit]

I’m traumatized by this episode

Honestly. I’ll probably rule this season out of my life.

We were lead to and keep up with a character, we were made to empathize with a character for years only to learn she is nothing more than a ruthless tyrant, a monster. Not only a monster, but the atrocities she committed made her far worse than any character in GoT has ever been - and that speaks something coming from this show which is ripe of ‘evil’.

They could have worked it better. If Daenerys had lost Rhaegal right upon the battle or if people hadn't surrendered it would make more sense, but they purposefully made her snap at the WORST possible moment, right when the battle was over: everything was in her hand’s reach, and she choose the worst possible action. This cemented her as a full tyrant.

I hate the implications that they made her ‘mad’, the acting, etc.. she did this while fully aware, and even before that... she already committed atrocities and killed Varys over some stupid plot. 

I just don’t care, there’s no excuse at all to what she’s done. Show Dany is a full blow monster and I don’t have any interest in the mindset of a character like this.

I don’t want to start a moral discussion here as I’m in the heat of after-watch so my feelings are not in check, but I feel like this is not worthy it. 

Even if it was well done. I abhor the tyrant plot... because I’m not personally interested in seeing, in following up, in watching the early life of a tyrant, honestly. If I wanted this I’d watch a doc on Hitler or some shit.

I love ‘villain’ characters, hell! Most of my favorite characters are antagonists, I’m used to this. A brilliant arc would be Darth Vader’s (Anakin) descent to evil or many other characters with similar descent to ‘darkness’. They start as good people who want to make a better world, and somehow lose their way... its actually one of my favorite character arcs, when it ends satisfying.

But these characters have something in common, even at the height of their villainousness, they never completely unnecessarily kill thousands upon thousands of innocent unarmed people just for the fuck sakes, without any sort of provocation whatsoever. Just for the fuck pleasure of burning a city down.

They had fucking surrendered.

What Dany did rules her our of the club. This is too much for me. I don’t know why but it seems to me miles worse than even the Jedi genocide, idk. I’m too angry to analyze this.

Even if I accept this is what happened, I ask you: What’s the point of watching a character growth for damn over 70 episodes for that to be the conclusion. Not only Daenerys (thought she was the worst), but many characters died and concluded their arcs doing exactly what was their base-mindset (i.e. Jaime). 

Dammit.

Daenerys is not even a compelling villain. Just a fucking monster

This ruined everything for me, even early seasons. Almost every character arc was ruined... truly ashen taste left in my mouth.

#got #got spoilers

[fireeaglespirit]

Shoutout to Varys for genuinely caring about the common people? What a novel concept in Westeros honestly

#I hated the dick talk with Tyrion #but yeah #I guess #got

[fireeaglespirit]

I was mostly projecting my own dream on them xD I’m glad you liked it <3

by Glitch Singapore

#got #viviane-lefay

[fireeaglespirit]

I'm worried they're rushing it too much. 

The last ep (4) was really rushed, I had no opportunity to re-watch it or even read too much about what people thought about it due to my sick stuff, but it left me very worried about the ending.

Just to make it clear: I personally don't like the tyrant/mad Dany plot, I'd rather have her turn out to be a good person and realize the truth about her power-seeking quest... it could lead to no good.

I always thought Dany (in the books at least) would realize her true ‘goal’ is something else than to rule, either related to the long night or something like ‘bringing magic back to the world’ and finding her true ‘home and family’ is not the throne...

But... they’re really doing that ain't them? I think the season could benefit from 10 episodes like HBO tried to do... 

fireeaglespirit:

People who blind themselves to Dany’s interests for what they are are up for an unpleasant surprise… I like her as a character but she ain’t the perfect angel people seem to believe. Also, I’m pretty sure the scenes between Sansa and Dany are going to have a pay off sooner than what we might think: next ep. preview already has some hints to a rift. The scene where people are cheering to Dany must be misleading, imo, problems are coming and they come soon.    

Nicely put!

#daenerys targaryen #got #viviane-lefay

[fireeaglespirit]

Had to take some time away for tests and stuff but still no conclusive, but I came back in time to the episode, even thought I’m not very excited (one more reason for stress, gods!).

Anyway, how is everyone?? 

BTW, depressive health stuff under the cut.

Gonna reply later, I injured my hand on top of all of it, but its not so serious, just a sore hand from writing too much (had some jobs to do last week), so I’m taking it as easy as possible as I learned if I stop asap it goes away before inflammation builds up and it gets chronic. 

I had some weird week... some of my old time conditions flared up suddenly (guess due to all the stress caused by my current diseases), man I’m a ball of problems... then the meds I had to take made me dizzy and feel like shit. I can barely stand this.. still have not resolved the ‘stone’ problem and its driving me crazy. Waves of pain, etc... but the worst is the anxiety. I don’t wanna surgery for something like this but it seems there’s no way out.

I can’t believe I miss the ‘faulty’ health I had a few years ago... it can get worse. It can always get worse, is something I learned through the years.

I know like this is nothing, I met people on the hospitals with ‘real’ problems and it made me feel like I’m whiny but still... too much for me to handle. Just wanna go back to my normal boring life its been roughly 2 months of bad things happening successively.. nonstop. I need a break.

#personal #news #i'm so tired #my body is literally made of jelly #just wanna a refund #I'm alive at least

[fireeaglespirit]

#birds #queue

[fireeaglespirit]

The green one shall be Rhaegal, for my valiant brother who died on the green banks of the Trident.

#CRIES #WTF #this post is so perfect #despite all the shit the episode this #the fandom always provides #got #rhaegar targaryen #rhaegal #got spoilers #spoilers

[fireeaglespirit]

On another bitter, side note: I thought Ghost would be Jon’s symbolic link to his parents, for being a white direwolf (white for Rhaegar’s hair color which Jon didn't inherit, and of course he would have a direwolf cause he is a true Stark by Lyanna’s line) and ... and that would be at least addressed briefly.

They threw everything out of the window.

#jon snow #ghost #got #got spoilers

[fireeaglespirit]

‪jon snow is cancelled for not petting ghost. ghost laid by your side when you died and you couldn’t even give him a pat‬ on the head!

#got #got spoilers #this is not my jon snow

[fireeaglespirit]

In the books the bond that all the Starks shared with their direwolves was extremely significant. (Most of us held the belief that they may be able to warg into their direwolves. )

But you’re telling me Jon, who has been with Ghost for 8 years, would just give him up, WITHOUT FUCKING SAYING GOODBYE!?!?!?

Why is Jon so out of character? Homeboy really does know nothing. I mean from an analyzing standpoint I would say it almost feels like their setting up his death. But… damn I hope not.

#this #ffs #I love the warg mental link in the books #got #got spoilers