fangsandfeels

[fangsandfeels]

Me, who played EA after each new patch, after reading this take with my two eyes:

I don’t wanna get into discourse, all the stuff that can be said has been said, I don’t care what people do in their game, but as someone that played EA since the start (300 hours, baby) I have to call bullshit on this, and the veneer of misogyny (those dumb female fans right?)

There was no ritual. We never got past act 1. This is bullshit. These are lies.

En fin, váyanse a la mierda 😌

#as someone who played EA i confirm not only there was no mention of the ritual or anything beyond Act 1 #but also astarion wasn't really more evil or villainous there. he had some reactions. sounded a bit more confident after sleeping with tav #also he used to be very VERY pro-tadpole but it was when Dream Lover was still a thing #but that's all that changed #and also there was a direct implication that cazador sexually abused him - they removed any mention of it in the final game #but the idea of him chasing power #because he associated it with safety and protection (not because he was evil) has always been there #also the datamined dialogues about scars and vulnerability has been there all the time. literally from the very beginning #i wouldn't be replaying EA after each patch to get more astarion content if he was just a typical evil companion with no depth #so this forum post is not just a lie but an extremely blatant and spiteful lie #literally cringed so hard it snapped me out from my depressive episode for a moment

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thank fuck someone had already translated the lyrics on youtube, I would've been in trouble explaining this. anyway, the portrait of Astarion had me on the floor and enabled me to survive Friday.

(non-Ukrainian speakers still won't be able to get all the nuances, but that's your lot in life ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

#astarion #folkulaka #ДваТри #ukrainian music #dead inside or not i must share it #my prescribed medication is nowhere to be found #so this clip represents everything that preserves my sanity rn

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Burned out Warrior

#art #animation #gifs #animated gifs #fantasy #fantasy warrior #burnout

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(c) @ crow__v

#ukraine #illustration #stand with ukraine

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24.02.2022

2 years/10 years of war

I'm angry and tired. I miss life without sirens and without waking up to terrible news

we still need so much to fight and survive. please consider helping Ukraine by donating or spreading the information 💙💛

#ukraine #russo ukrainian war #russia is a terrorist state #stand with ukraine #russian invasion #russian aggression

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730 days...

To be honest, I can't believe it. It's already 10 years of war and 730 days of full-scale invasion.

I have not much to say, 'cause this war turned my life and the lives of other Ukrainians into a completely new reality. I am not sure I would ever "heal" from this all. Is it even possible?

Today, 24 February 2024... I wanna say thank you to the people who still support us in any way possible.

I wanna say thank you, to Ukrainians, who are dealing with it, doing all possible. I wanna say thank you to our defenders.

And... Please, if you have a possibility, light up the candle in memory of the ones, who won't ever meet new day. In memory of our civilians and heroes.

#ukrainian tumblr #to non-ukrainian users: ukraine is still at war. we're still fighting against russian invaders because it's either this or quiet genocide #even as civillians who are lucky to work and have a semblance of everyday life and hobbies among the air raids #we are still the part of this reality. and i don't think we'll heal. #we mourn. and we're thankful to those who protect us. our right to exist. our right to have a home. #ukraine #stand with ukraine #russia is a terrorist state #russian war crimes

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Пост, який, можливо, зрозуміє шановне українське панство по фандому БГ3.

Причина, з котрої я так люблю Астаріона - це те, що я особисто та вважаю що він ще зіронька справжня в плані поведінки та світогляду.

Бо я своєю тотально попаяною, поплавленою кукухою зараз тямлю, що можна бути набагато більшою, небезпечнішою та жовчнішою сукою з мінімумом принципів та готовністю забили отакезного болта на всіх, хто не має до тебе відношення.

Навіть готова продемонструвати.

Бо коли ти роками розкладаєшся в пеклі з якого немає виходу, яке повільне розчиняє все чим ти був та що було в тобі, яке досить цілеспрямовано тебе калічить так, щоб в тебе не було дороги назад, щоб ти забув хто ти та що ти та так й помер, не дізнавшись - і все це, поки решта світу собі живе та радісно ігнорує зло, яке тому світові майже в очі дзюрить.

Але потім цей світ тобі ще претензії висуває.

Занадто різко розмовляєш. Занадто нещирий. Занадто злий. Занадто грубий. Занадто отруйний. Занадто недобрий. Занадто егоїст. Не так себе поводисся. Чому не білий та пухнастий після того як тебе перемололо та якимось дивом ще не вбило.

Маєш поводитися інакше.

Маєш бути кращим не заради себе, а щоб нам було з тобою зручніше.

А ще при цьому всьому ось ти, конкретно ти, маєш, просто зобов'язан виішувати усі проблеми та кризи світу перед тим, як хтось у світі взагалі подумає про те, щоб допомогти тобі. А якщо відмовишься - то мабуть то просто ти гнилий та поганий. Можливо ти завжди таким був. Можливо ти заслуговував на все, що з тобою зробили. Й тому сильним та добрим цього світу, варто ще подумати, допамагати тобі, чи додатково тебе під ребра пнути, бо якесь ти недостатньо вдячне.

Яке може бути після цього бажання думати про когось або щось ще, окрім себе?

Як не хотіти не просто стриманно та саркастично відповідати, а не вербально та ментально знищити, макнути обличчям у власне лицемірне лайно та провозити? Штовхнути у прірву.

Тому коли я чую про те, який він аморальний або який він пихатий козел, то лише посміхаюсь. Знали б, наскільки гірше все могло би виглядати, охуїли би.

#укртумбочка #український tumblr #bg3 #технічно це пост про вигаданного персонажа #але по факту ні))

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today is the birthday of ukrainian visual artist lyubov panchenko. she would be 86 today but she died in april 2022 after suffering prolonged starvation during russian occupation of bucha

#ukraine #ukrainian art #russian invasion of ukraine #russia is a terrorist state #lyubov panchenko was a woman who fought her entire life against an oppressive regime #preserving national identity #helping political prisoners #she dedicated her best years to fighting and standing up to oppressors #but russians decided it wasn't enough so they took her peaceful sunset years too #ukrainian women #ukrainian artists

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This is what everyone who suggests to just give up supports. Giving up means torture, displacement, rape and death for Ukrainians. russian occupation is hell.

#ukraine #russia is a terrorist state #russians are nazis #“oh but how bad would it be if you negotiated?” THAT BAD #sorry that we don't want to get sent to concentration camps and genocided #also fuck the pope for wanting a ukrainian and a ruzzian woman to stand next to each other as the “symbol of hope” #stand with ukraine #to some people it's shock content to us it's a real threat

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It just occurred to me...

...that nothing was really stopping Cazador from Ascending aside from his lack of brain cells.

If the chamberlain guy was afraid that he'd become a replacement in the ritual to the point he tried to fake his suicide (and overdid it), it probably was technically possible.

The kidnapped victims weren't connected with their kidnappers through blood - none of the Cazador's spawns bit them. Cazador did. Cazador easily became a replacement for Astarion in the Ascension ritual - which meant there were no specific requirements for the sacrificial lamb aside from the runes on their skin.

So, technically, Cazador didn't need to catch Astarion to continue the ritual. He could have easily Turned any other person into a spawn, carved the runes, and proceeded with his plan. Only one piece of the contract was missing and it was rather easy to replace.

But he just had to be a little bitch about it. He just couldn't let it go even for a moment. He had to show who's The Boss. He had to Make a Point.

He spent tendays, months coping and seething over his bruised ego, refusing to proceed with the Ritual before Astarion came back -- and in his self-obsessed mind Astarion had no choice to come back because the opposite would be an insult to his Vampire Lord status.

The Ascension was literally at his fingertips. He could have Ascended, walked out into the sunlight, and used all that newly gained power to find Astarion himself.

But did he do that? Noo.

He chose to stomp off to his bitching corner and make an Astarion-shaped salt mine in his diary.

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #shit-hunter the diva #as much as i love dubbing on cazador #it shows that they had to rewrite his involvement in the plot a lot #honestly would have loved solving a problem where cazador already became an ascendant w/o astarion #or something like that

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Salty-sweet revenge

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 fanart #astarion #bg3 astarion

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#jakub rozalski #the witcher #but also how i imagine jerra and her mentor's working routine before the game events #but also having to deal with corrupt and atrocity-committing humans and humanoids even more often than with just monsters #bg3 oc: jerra

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So New Year started from a massive shelling of ruzia

Three  days of 2024 and I already hate it.

I don`t know how many explosions I heard near me, more than 20 for sure. I hate it. I hate ruzia. I hate war. And I hate that in 21 century in midddle of Europe I should live through this. If not weapons from friendly countries, I can`t even imagine what could happen. 

Like maybe I could already lying under the ground. . Probably dead

My dad thought it was a good idea to ride on a work DURING MASSIVE SHELLING.

And I called him just to know how is he (I thought he was at home, I was so mad at him) 

And he was like:-I saw 4 rockets fly at your house 

Can`t say how many horrors we live through. Good that we have weapons at least our army could pretect us. Can you imagine? This missles is nearly impossible to shot down. (If you didn`t know how air defence work you better read. If simple one rocket must to shoot another) 

When Air Alert started I take my emergency bag and hard disk with work files

And when it`s ended I sit to work and find out that disk is broken and I lost all my work files. 

At least i`m alive , healthy, I have home and family. That`s a good start.

And at least I have my own reasons and goals to live

At least to see putin's death and see fall of his razist empire. So I drunk for that. 

#russia is a terrorist state #true: fuck being nice #may russia burn #укртамблер

[fangsandfeels]

The secret to ignoring the discourse is being too dead inside to care about it in the first place because your country is fighting off a fucking invasion by fucking russian nazis, and every day you bury your plans for the future a bit deeper into the ground, and every day you learn that you won't get to thank yet another amazing person for protecting you, and every day you think less of how you'll live your life and more about how you will die all while the rest of the world treats your country's tragedy like a trend.

Getting to play a game you had waited several years for felt so damn good to the point you remembered what the pre-war you were like and had to struggle with the feeling of guilt for enjoying things and taking breaks. It didn't exactly remove the soul-crushing realization that the "we won't let Nazis happen again/we'll always fight evil" promise was a big fat lie...but hey, you simply can't afford to be bothered by any discourse.

Getting away from Tumblr for a while. Wish I could get away into a world where russians don't exist, but obviously, we can't have nice things.

All the next posts will be coming from an unpaused queue.

#personal #me to the world: i hope you die screaming #russia is a terrorist state

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she doesn't even notice the birds

#my mood right now

[fangsandfeels]

She's gone

This is her husband. I can hardly even type right now.

She was killed in action today.

My soulmate is gone.

#i didn't know her and yet i'm so angry and numb #when i think about all the people i'll never get to thank for protecting us i die inside even more #i don't write about my life here because i know that anyone who didn't experience the horror of having russia as a neighbor wouldn't care #and screaming into the void is exhausting and counter-productive #i owe my safety here in ukraine to brave and amazing people like her #i'm safe enough to live and work and support my country and write stupid fan posts in-between because of heroes like her #her story needs to be shared #good people pay for the hypocrisy of cowards who still try to pacify murderers and convince us to negotiate with literal nazis #fuck russia #fuck all russians #Героям Слава #ukraine #russia is a terrorist state #russia #war in ukraine

[fangsandfeels]

Some Astarion Endings Thoughts. This is mostly just analysis ramblings and going over the endings and how Ascended Astarion and Spawn Astarion differ.

You have the free the spawn ending, where the cycle of abuse is ended and the Player Character chose to give the other spawn a chance to either be the monster they were made to be OR try to be more than that. And it isn't a perfect solution because, yes, they're rabid, starving vampires. There is always a chance that choice goes wrong, especially if player choices led to the Gur being wiped out AND the other 6 spawn being killed during the ritual.

Mercy killing, not sacrificing the spawn, is seen as an equally good choice, though it's complicated for the reasons stated above. None of the Spawn are there by choice and mercy-killing them takes away the freedom and autonomy that Astarion was very lucky to have even experienced. It's a hard decision, but the characters recognize it was either this or risk unleashing a HOARD of ravenous Spawn. The Underdark is uniquely qualified to be home to 7000+ hungry Vampire Spawn, but not everyone is going to go down there. In fact, if you send the spawn there, you find out not all of them even make it to where they decide to settle.

Mercy killing the spawn ensures no one else can be hurt by any of the spawn, whether it be their bloodthirst or violence as a reaction to the cruelty they experienced. However, the spawn made by Cazador ARE all innocent people. If you play Oath of Devotion Paladin and mercy kill the spawn, you will break your Oath because every single victim of his is just that. A victim. Astarion has a few moments throughout the story where he tries to convince the player - and himself - that not all of Cazador's victims could be innocents, but they very much are.

Astarion desperately doesn't want to see himself in them. The spawn in the cells are a reflection of what he was like when Cazador had him locked in that tomb or when Cazador had him starving on bugs and rats, and he has NO idea what he looks like anymore. I'm not even sure he's fully convinced he doesn't look partially like that tbh

The third option for Astarion's spawn ending is to just leave the other spawn in their prisons, which is seen as a really fucking cruel fate. Killing them is better than just leaving them there to starve for the rest of their eternal lives. This is also Astarion's cruelest choice, the one he makes to spite the player AND the other spawn because of how helpless he feels if he's not properly convinced to give up the power that was just within his grasp. If he cannot be fully free of Cazador and the pain he caused, then none of the other spawn can, either.

Regardless of the player's decision on what to do with the spawn, if Astarion is kept a spawn, he's able to empathize with the other victims of Cazador and see himself in them. He is forced to contend with the fact that NONE of them deserved to be caught in Cazador's cruelty. In his Spawn ending, he sees the other spawn for what they are: victims of a cruel man trying to play power games by using people as pawns and currency.

Ascension is meant to represent locking into the cycle of abuse. For Astarion, this first step is achieved by sacrificing over seven thousand souls. This move alone changes the Spawn from representations of himself, and the depths of the horrors he experienced, into currency to trade for the power to ensure he will never be in that position ever again. Rather than victims of the same horrors, they become a necessary price to pay in service of elevating him to a station above their own.

And he does see himself as a being above everyone else once he Ascends. He sees mortals as cattle. Potential pets or food, but animals that need to be herded all the same.

This includes Tav/Durge.

The whole plan to seduce Tav/Durge was born from the person Astarion was while still reeling from two centuries of of Hell. It was habits and survival instincts from living under Cazador that start to unravel when the reality of it all starts to set in. You catch peeks of who he is behind his carefully constructed mask of charm and prepared scripts, poison delivered with sweet words and a perfectly composed smile.

When he confesses, he wants to give Tav/Durge something real, but it also a mirror to what will happen in his diverging pathways. If he remains Spawn, he can give them something real. They're equal, loving partners. Ascended Astarion sees their partner as a potential pet to be loved, lavished, but ultimately owned.

The ownership is for a couple of reasons. One is so that he can ensure he has someone who will never turn on him. It's clear he has an alignment shift to being straight up evil and wants to conquer...and he talks about it in front of Faerun's best monster hunters. He needs to make sure Tav/Durge isn't included in that. He also wants to make sure they never leave him. Since he never faces what Cazador did, nor does he face the fact that things ARE changing and it's generally a good thing for people to grow and relationships to change with that growth, he wants to make sure things remain in stasis. Spawn Astarion trusts Tav/Durge to not do anything to hurt him and trusts the future they have together, whatever that may be. Turning them into a Spawn when Astarion Ascends ensures that there IS no change. Ever. Tav/Durge and the relationship are quite literally frozen in time.

Once Astarion Ascends, he stops seeing any of his companions as anything but potential pawns. His Origin Ascended ending provides an excellent glimpse at how he views the companions. Their collective strength is just ripe for plucking and he isn't afraid to make them spawn by force. I think the coldness the player can comment on after he Ascends is because he no longer feels any kinship toward the companions. He can create a script and run through it, but there won't be warmth where his beating heart is still rotted to its core.

Ascending him also starts him on the path to becoming another Cazador. If you go into the room with Vellioth's skull AFTER the ritual, rather than before, you get specific interactions with the various items that are WILDLY different from Spawnstarion (who also reacts differently depending on if it's before or after the ritual).

Astarion shows hesitation if taken into the room BEFORE the ritual, because he's forced to see the names of the people he has to sacrifice to ascend AND he sees how pathetic Cazador is when it comes to Vellioth. If you interact with the list of names or Vellioth's skull after choosing NOT to ascend, Astarion shows more remorse and empathy.

and as a side note THAT is who he is beneath the burden of his pain, when he is able start freeing himself from it. cazador's symbol is the knot of rats. Astarion sees the knot and cannot see himself in it, even though he himself is just one of the rats who happened to escape.

Ascended Astarion, on the other hand, is flippant. There's a list of names of ALL the spawn he sacrificed to ascended, and he just. He doesn't take seriously AT ALL that he just sent all those souls to be tormented in the Hells. Ascended Astarion never sees himself as a rat to begin with. He sees himself as a victim, but the others caught in Cazador's trap were all unfortunates and other bad words he can use to make them seem less deserving of empathy (empathy that he no longer has, when he ascends imo)

Astarion spent the first two acts feeling like he needed to rely on them for protection because he never felt his own strength was enough, even though his kit is fucking BROKEN, but I digress. Ascending him affirms that he wasn't strong enough to protect them in a meaningful way as is, and also that no part of him was enough as just a spawn. He doesn't want to continue to rely on the player for protection, but Ascended Astarion is more than happy to make the most powerful beings in Faerun his spawn so they can keep him protected. All that power from the ritual, and he wants an army of powerful Spawn to do the dirty work for him.

As an extension of this, turning romanced Tav/Durge into a spawn is to make sure he has complete control over the one person he views as stronger than himself. Slaying Cazador is something he always credits to the player. Ascended Astarion is constantly haunted by Cazador and what he did. Tav/Durge was the one being stronger than him, which makes them a threat if they ever turn on him. Now, he knows he has one person he can always trust.

He even starts laying out very similar rules to the ones Cazador had for his spawn. The way he starts mentioning them is very manipulative, too. They're statements made to seem like he's just expressing the depth of his devotion (still creepy), but he's really setting up being able to reiterate the rules without it being weird once the tadpoles are dealt with. He's fully aware that the tadpole will prevent Spawn!Player from being completely under his control. It's why you can break up with him before the end, but then he refuses to let the player go at the very end.

Spawn ending, when not romanced, Astarion decides to just travel by himself and become a hero. He doesn't find another group to travel with. He goes by himself. Spawn Astarion recognizes his own strength, embraces his Vampirism, not as something that taints him, but as a power to be unleashed on the real monsters. HE does the dirty work.

I love love love exploring both endings and I love the way Astarion's character can grow depending on player choice, then completely branch into two different ways once you hit the Ascension vs Spawn choice.

ty for reading my ramblings. I know this wasn't a straightforward analysis or anything, and def doesn't have an actual conclusion or like. point beyond character exploration. a lot of these thoughts are just me thinking character through so i can write them better. i want to explore these aspects of him, but I do ramble things first to get general characterization thoughts out.

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #bg3 astarion #that's neat analysis! #thanks op