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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊32

is this what i get for being a dreamer?

i have what it takes, but it's taking everything i got. i wish i could start again. just waking up from sir snapping his fingers in my face during english lit class. i hated it when he did that to me in front of everyone. now it's the only thing that i wish for; just to go back in time.

it's like god's testing me from heaven to see how far i'm willing to go for the things that i love. hell, i think i'm going pretty far for it, don’t you think?

my brother honking the fuck out of dad's car jolts me awake from my sleep~inducing thoughts. he groans exasperatedly at the vehicles in front of us for literally following the rules, and when they reject him, he recklessly switches lanes to speed past them. it's been like an hour or more of this when finally i see something tragically familiar through the windshield.

the blood~red stelvio.

i know it’s his.

he came back for me...

"what?" kayrem takes a glance at me before squinting back through the windshield. "what do you see? that one there?" he points. "with the alfa romeo suv? that him?"

i nod.

"perfect!" kayrem chuckles. "saves me the petrol money."

kayrem then goes off to flash the life out of the headlights and further slamming his palm on the horn again to grab isaac's attention. isaac catches on pretty swift. my brother switches to the lane closest to the partition that's in the middle of the highway and isaac does the same thing on the opposite side. then we get out of our cars in the middle of a goddamn highway.

"rosé!" isaac yells in the wind. "i came back for you!"

"'nough with this bullshit!" kayrem spits out. "tell her! she deserves to know!"

"who the hell is he?" isaac points at kayrem.

"is it true?" i question sadly.

"what's true?" isaac inquires, confused.

kayrem barks out a specific time, day and year.

isaac stares at him, stunned and conscience~stricken. a part of him solidifies, a part of him liquefies. then he sighs, looking abashed and blinking for the longest of times. "rosé, i didn't want you to find out this way."

"just tell me, tell me it was an accident. that's all i care about."

"it...

wasn't

...an accident.”

i hurt hearing those words.

"they had been belittling my father's business for years," he elucidates. "i warned them, tried everything for them to leave my parents the hell alone, but no. the authorities," he laughs resentfully, "of course they wouldn't do shit, so i took matters into my own hands."

i shake my head in despondency.

"call me a vigilante, an anarchist, i don't give a fuck. but i did what i did to protect my own family, rosé, wouldn’t you do the same?"

the lull around me makes me feel like i'm high on lsd.

"yeah, whatever," kayrem chuckles carelessly behind me.

isaac blocks him out, "but that's my past. it was worlds ago."

"that's why you didn't want to leave this place the normal way because even if i were a willing participant and of age, you were afraid that the cops there would try to inform me of your criminal record before i did anything stupid with you. it was never 'cause of hélène, was it?"

“no it was, i needed her to sign the papers so i could marry you legally.”

“and..and a family.. you murdered a family, they told me?”

"it was only supposed to be him. i didn't know his entire family would be in the car with him. i was 28, drunk and enraged, and that night ended with an eternal mistake."

maybe this is it, maybe i'm afraid?

"there isn't a day that goes by where i don't think about them," he states in self condemnation. "which is why i always send the couples' grandparents a cheque on the anniversary of the accident. the family might've died once, but i die nonstop every day thinking about my sin."

i encircle my arms around his torso and lean my head into his chest, giving him the comfort he needs. he wraps his manly arms above my shoulders and exhales like he was holding in his breath. this thing we call love, we keep going back and forth with it. it has to end somewhere.

"with you, i can breathe," he whispers. "i can breathe."

i'm slipping through the crevices of his numbing embrace.

"i'm sorry, sweetheart.”

"you promised me 'no more sorries'," i look up into his glazy eyes.

he's lost for words.

do i really know him? how many lies can one take? how many more apologies can one believe? when is the time to walk away when you're still truly, madly, deeply in love? these are the questions in my tears that are staining his shirt.

"i was blind and you were broken," i say in a hushed voice.

droplets roll down my cheeks and i can tell that he wants to wipe them off, though i halt his hands in advance. so he kisses the tears right off my face instead. his lips land softly underneath one of my eyes, so soft that i almost don't feel it. then he does the same on the other side.

i sniffle and place something in the middle of his palm before curling his fingers over it. when his gaze meets mine again, there's utter destruction in his eyes. destructive emerald fire with his blood vessels splattering like magma.

i turn around.

"you know what, rosé?!" his voice rains bullets behind me. "i thought you were healing me, but no, you just broke me even more!"

i try my hardest to keep walking away.

"fuck you, rosé blackburn! fuck you!”

my eyes drift down to my ring finger, it feels achingly odd with nothing on there now... kayrem comfortingly smiles at me, indicating to me that i made the right decision. but then, why doesn’t it feel right? with each step i take, the further i walk away from

isaac

goddamn

killian.

...𝒾𝓉 𝒹ℴℯ𝓈𝓃'𝓉 𝓊𝓃𝒹ℯ𝓇𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓃𝒹 ℯ𝓃𝒹𝒾𝓃ℊ𝓈.

#teacher x student #love #story #romance #siblings #aesthetic #quotes #poetry

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evolsinner · 3 years

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⊱┊31

morning arrives. after getting dressed, i stand in front of the full~length mirror that’s stuck to the back of my bedroom door. my ring shines in the reflection and i aimlessly roll it around my finger.

i've made up my mind, this is what i'm going to do: i've already told kayrem about the baby so that's off my conscience. if i let isaac know how uncomfortable i am with keeping it, he'll be sure to support me on whatever my decision may be. besides, he doesn't even have to know about how it came to be so yeah.

"mum," i take the final step down from the staircase. "hi, i was going to~"

"take a seat," she gestures to the chair next to maxi, my usual spot.

all of them try to not stare at me, though i can see how hard it is for them to keep their eyes cast down. maxi's the only one that's not making me feel like an animal in a cage. he's too busy passionately eating his porridge.

"roséah," mum says when i've finally settled down, "your father might've touched on it briefly, but we would like to say it officially."

okay?

"honey, only if you spoke to us about how much pressure we've been putting on you lately then we would've understood," she explains.

"but~"

"let me finish," she shuts me down. "ever since kayrem left, we vowed to better ourselves in the parenting department purely to ensure something like that would never happen to another one of our children again. we know now," she glances at dad, "that we've failed."

kayrem was right, when he left all those years ago, it was cause he wanted mum and dad to be better for me. i mixed up a sacrifice with selfishness. that’s on me, i guess.

"and for that, we are both deeply sorry," dad summarises.

“you’ve got to talk to us,” mum emphasises. “but teenagers barely ever do,” she adds bitterly.

"thank you for understanding, i guess.”

"with that being said," mum exhales loudly, a sudden deviation in her tone, "there's something you should know because as parents we're obligated to tell you."

kayrem clears his throat.

"you should know that.." she pauses before starting again. "isaac killian was a convicted criminal."

"what?"

"it's true, hun," dad solidifies.

"are you guys crazy or what?"

kayrem scoffs.

"we're not 'crazy', rosé," dad tells me. “we care about your safety.”

"you both may be lawyers and you both may be my parents, but that doesn't mean you go around falsifying shit just to have things your way!"

"listen to them, marie," kayrem chips in.

"shut up, you moron!"

maxi jumps in fright.

“hey, maxi,” i say softly. “why not you go upstairs and feed homie his breakfast? he must be really hungry.”

maxi gives me a quick hug and silently leaves.

i return my attention back to my parents, “you seriously have to do this in front of him?”

"all charges have been dropped against him because, well, look at his assets," mum speaks in a passive~aggressive tone. "however, you can find anything if you dig deep enough."

this is total bs and i'm not having any of it!

"if he did it once, he can most definitely do it again," she continues. "i'm only telling you this, roséah, because you're not as smart as you think you are. and as parents, it's our job~"

"oh my god, mum, just shut up with that 'as parents' shit! i get it!"

"do not talk to me in that tone, young lady!"

"alright, alright," dad puts his hands up. "ladies, let us keep this civilised, shall we? rosé," he faces me determinedly, "think about it this way: is this the first time isaac killian has lied to you?"

no... hélène, too.

"and let's not forget how it was not an accident, it was deliberate!" mum adds in for extra shock value.

"this is all bullshit!" i stand up, my chair scraping against the ground. "you're the ones who are lying to me!"

mum firmly pushes her seat back and stands up. she walks over to her tote sitting on the countertop and returns with a manila folder which she tosses flat on the table in front of me. "read it," she demands. "legal documents don't just make themselves up!"

"so mama i'm in love with a criminal! so fucking what?"

"don't be ridiculous, roséah!"

"fuck this. i'm out!" and i run out of the house.

kayrem follows me out, "marie, slow down or you'll get yourself hit by a car!"

i spin around, stopping in the middle of the road, "i sure hope so!"

"look, this isn't even about you or me or our parents even! it's about him! do you really think a sane person goes around killing families on purpose? no, because that'll make them insane! but of course, risk everything for the sake of some airy~fairy love, right? seems perfectly reasonable to me."

"he isn't a goddamn killer!"

"you're just afraid to face the truth. it's as simple as that."

"oh yeah? and is this the 'truth' you, mum and dad are making it out to be? all you guys ever care about is the shit that gets written down in the papers, about your dumb reputations! not at all about the root problem, and the root problem being that you should've never left us in the first place! scratch that. you should've never came back!"

there’s a sudden long pause and he glares at me through it every second of it, "you are just one dumb fucking fat bitch, marie.”

“wow! got more to say? go ahead, say it. i wanna hear it.”

“yeah, i’ve got some more,” he takes a few steps closer to me. “you don’t deserve to be loved. why? because you play with people’s feelings. you want something and you get it. and when you want more, you get more. doesn’t matter who you fucking hurt in the process because, hey, at least it’s not your own damn self, right? you’re selfish! a goddamn worthless slut! i’m ashamed to even call you my sister.”

his words didn’t hurt me that much, not until he said that last line... that cut deep. “and here i thought you cared about me.”

he laughs, “care about you? i would never.”

“really?” with each sentence, i take a step closer to him. “are you sure about that? because last time i checked, you’re the one who kissed me first. you’re the one who wanted to kiss me again when i clearly said it wasn’t a good idea.”

“lower your damn voice!” kayrem says through his teeth.

“you’re the one who ate, my, pussy.”

“marie, are you deaf?! mother and father are right fucking there!” he points to the house furiously.

“you’re the one who wanted me to suck your dick! so, no, don’t go around saying that you don’t give a shit about me when it’s pretty damn obvious that you d~”

whiplash, i’ve been pulled in and a pair of lips are attacking my mouth. i don’t put up much of a fight. my brother wraps his arms around me. mmm… the kiss deepens quickly and it’s like we’re taking out our frustrations about each other on each other.

“fuck off!” i break the kiss and push him away.

he scoffs and roughly grips my wrist. then instead of dragging me back to the house like i expect him to, he drags me to dad's car. "let's go and find that idiot and let him tell you himself," he opens the front seat door and waits for me to get in.

i stand my ground.

“get inside now or i’ll fucking throw you inside,” he orders.

with a scowl, i obey and kayrem grabs my seatbelt, roughly clicking it in for me before slamming the door shut after me. it thuds loudly and pieces of my fringe go flying up in the air. i’m left in awful silence whilst he runs back into the house to get the keys. he comes back and starts the engine, not even bothering to put his own seatbelt, and roughly reverses out.

gosh.

#love #teacher x student #story

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evolsinner · 3 years

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⊱┊30

i don't need 'looking after'! i am perfectly capable of taking care of my own damn self. from the moment kayrem has walked back into our lives, he's been showing off. he's trying to prove his 'worth' to the family, and it's annoying the heck out of me!

first, he takes me away from isaac against my will, then he does this elaborate show of how much he still has an effect on me. i mean, the only reason i called him is that there was no one else to call!! and now he's brought a fucking dog for maxi? sucking up to father? it's not fair! he just doesn't get to be gone for this long and then have the easiest welcome back party.

i hate him!

after grumpily hopping out of the shower, i crash straight into bed. mum's doing overtime which means i'll get to see her first thing in the morning. this is good because i'm still figuring out what to say to her.

my parents always change roles, either one of them is too mad and the other is understanding or vice versa. so i guess she’s gonna be playing the ‘mad’ role tomorrow.

i slide out of bed and creep down the hallway, pausing at the source of the problem…in me.

"what are you doing?" i push the door further in.

without looking up from his crouching position, kayrem’s like, “the dvd player is jacked up. i'm tryna get it to work," and takes a gulp from his redbull.

"can't you wait till tomorrow to do it?"

"tomorrow can wait."

ugh, i never seem to make sense of his comebacks like these. just answer properly, jeez. "what are you tryna watch anyway?"

"get in the bed and you'll see," he grins.

the fuck? wait... i mean, i do kinda need to tell him something so..

"oh, and, shut the door. make sure to lock it too."

"'lock it'?" i stand there nervously.

"we don't want anyone walking in."

huh?

"if one of those scenes happen to come on," he adds like an afterthought.

"oh..." i shut the door and crawl into his bed, sitting up and crossing my legs. "why not just netflix and chill? that dvd player is pretty old; i don't think you can get it to work." i immediately shut my mouth, realising what i said could be taken the wrong way too.

he quits messing about with the player and looks over his shoulder at me with an amused frown, "huh?"

"i meant, like, watch a movie on the laptop. not..y'know. like, literally only a movie and nothing else."

"fine, i suppose you do have a point," he turns off the tv and dvd player before grabbing the laptop and climbing into bed with me. "fuck,” he taps away at the keys, “forgot it was flat.”

"can you just sleep with me instead?"

he raises his eyebrows, surprised.

"next to me! n~not with me!" i quickly clarify before laying down, all red and hot.

i hear the lid of the laptop shut, followed by a swift motion of a shirt being pulled off. the bed dips as a body lies down behind me. gradually, i feel warmth shifting closer to me and the smell of red bull breath. like magnets, we stick together. a hand weaves its way underneath my shirt and i tense up.

"relax," he coos.

his fingers trace over my mini love handles, nearing my belly button. i don't know if i want him to go higher or lower. slightly, i back up into him, rubbing my ass in circular motions on his dick. a grunt leaves his mouth, his hot breath hitting my nape. my respiration elevates and the follicles on my forearms stand up.

"sorry," i sigh.

"don't be. if you like it, keep doing it."

i back up into him further and rest my ass on his bulge. his hand goes higher, tracing the side of my boob, to my underboobs, then to the other side; forming a 'w' in the process.

"you're not wearing a bra.”

"..they're uncomfortable."

he slowly goes up the slopes of my boobs and runs his thumb over my tits, kneading them for a while. "you like this?"

"mhm.."

"how about this?" he skims his hand all the way down to the top of my panties.

i turn a little on my back and buck my hips up, desperately inching my body closer to his fingertips. he inserts his hand and goes past the stubble to reach my throbbing clit. now i can feel the pressure of his dick getting erect and also his hand on my pussy.

"here?" his finger hovers.

"y..yes.."

he tenderly presses down and a moan escapes my mouth.

"you're so sensitive, babysis," he whispers. "i haven't even started."

he rubs my button in a figure 8 which makes me squirm like a worm. his fingers slide in between my moist folds, massaging me, as they go back up again to torture my clit.

"kayrem, please, in..in me."

he puts his mouth next to my ear, "how many?"

"as many as you can fit.."

"on one condition, you have to call me by my middle name from now on, sis."

knots get created in my stomach. knots and crosses. clusters and ravels. memories and misery. no, this cannot be happening again. i was here to talk to him, not play with him.

"stop.”

"what?"

"lavanda," i pull his hand out, "i'm sorry."

he doesn't say anything, but i can tell he's not that happy. i turn to face him. he's lying on his back with an arm crossed behind his head, in a pensive mood. there's a sense of nostalgia dancing in his distant expression as he stares out the skylight. i cuddle up to him, laying an arm and a leg over his torso.

“missed my room,” he murmurs melancholically.

“yeah, think i liked it better as a guest room.”

“shut up,” he rolls his eyes. "…why did you come back, marie?"

"i have something to tell you."

he glances at me curiously with those hazel eyes. how can i get lost in them when i have the exact same colour? his other sleeveless arm lingers over the blanket. i shift closer to him so that my body gently presses into his. he’s warm.

"i'm pregnant."

nothing but tensive as hell silence fills the room.

finally, kayrem exhales loudly, his stomach deflating and my arm lowering with the motion. "why the fuck are you telling me that?" he shoves me away. "i don't care about the shit you do with him. i also don't appreciate you bringing his shit back here."

"your shit."

"what?" he faces me with a blank expression.

"it's yours."

he opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out.

i sit up criss~cross applesauce. "that night when we did it, i..i haven't gotten my.." i clear my throat and start again. "i haven't gotten my..my.. ugh, sorry," i apologise, picking at my cuticles.

"it's okay. you can tell me. i’m your big brother," kayrem leans up on his elbow and stops me from fidgeting.

"i haven't gotten my period since. isaac said that he could deal with me being.." i gesture with my eyes to my tummy, "but he doesn't know that it's yours. and if he did, i don't know what he'll think of me. i just thought you should know before i did anything.”

“i..uhh…” kayrem scratches the back of his head. "do you know how far along you are?"

i shake my head.

"have you been to the doctors?"

i shake my head again.

"jesus, marie, have you done anything for it?"

no…

"i'm taking you to the docs tomorrow, i don't care," and he slumps back down.

"what, no!"

"you're going."

"i'm not!"

"like, hell."

"for fuck's sake!" i throw my hands up in the air. "i'm not keeping it, okay!”

he glares at me, trying to remain pragmatic, "i'm pretty sure this is the hormones talking, not you."

"don't you dare blame this on the hormones!"

"fine then," he spits out, "why even tell me all this when you could've gotten rid of it back there?! huh!?"

"because you had the right to know,” i murmur sadly.

he closes his eyes and shakes his head with a sigh, "you don't have to get rid of it because of how it came to be. it's selfish..heedless."

i shrug.

“if you’re worried about mother and father, don’t be. as long as i’m here, nobody can hurt you.”

yet he hurts me from simply uttering those weighty words.

"you can still give it up, but don't kill it.”

"we need to… incest and stuff. it’ll look like an alien.”

“incest or love?”

“i don’t love you, loser.”

“listen, we made the risk the moment we decided not to use..” he stops himself, clearly agitated. “anyways, the point is, marie, you're not a killer. you're nowhere close to being like him."

“what did you say?”

"nothing.”

“no, you said something, tell me.”

“dang it," kayrem rolls his eyes frustratedly. "i wasn't supposed to say anything till morning."

"what are you talking about?"

"hey," he grips my hand softly. "c’mon, let's go to sleep."

"no," i snatch my hand back. "i don't want you touching me right now."

he scoffs, "for real?"

i stare at him.

“whatever, get some sleep," and he turns on his other side, throwing the blanket over himself.

"i hate you, kayrem, i really do."

no answer.

i was about to leave his stupid room when the door sways open quietly.

"rosé, are you in here?" maxi's fragile voice wonders.

"buddy, what's up?" kayrem lifts his head up.

"wasn't talkin' to you," maxi mumbles.

"maxi, what happened?" i ask him.

"rosé," he says with relief when he hears my voice, "i..i had a nightmare and it was... it was..." he breaks into tears before having the chance to finish his sentence.

"naw, baby, come here," i hold my arms out.

"it was really scary!" he squeals and runs to me.

"it was just a nightmare, maxi, a bad dream," i console him, wiping his tears away. "it's not real. you have nothing to worry about, i promise."

"can i sleep with you guys, please?" he asks innocently.

“let’s go to my room, okay?”

"of course," kayrem grips my arm. "jump in, maximus. you can sleep in the middle, between me and marie."

"the... the house was on fire," maxi lays down, and i pull the covers over him. "i couldn't find you, rosé. i couldn't find mummy or daddy or kayrem too. when i looked out the window, i saw all of you standing there and smiling at me."

"jesus..." kayrem mutters.

"you know us, maxi," i sweep his locks to the side. "we would never leave you if the house was ever on fire. that wasn't us in your dream. they just looked like us."

"but you left me ~ twice, already."

i have trouble replying, sorta embarrassed, and give kayrem a glance.

"hey, bud, it was just a nightmare, alright?" he decides to step in for me. "nightmares can scare you, but they can't hurt you."

"see, you're safe with us," i add. "now go to sleep," i kiss him on the forehead. "kayrem and i will make sure the monsters can't come and get you."

"yeah, lil bro, your sister and i...we have our ways," he sends me a wink.

ew.

maxi nods, sobbing in my chest, and tries to fall asleep.

"what the fuck kind of movies have you been letting him watch lately?!" i hiss at kayrem.

"just an ep or two of supernatural," he informs me. "didn't think it'd be that bad."

"you didn't think..??" i shake my head in irritation. "you're such an idiot..!"

after 10 minutes or so, i can hear little snores coming from maxi.

kayrem puts his arm across maxi and rests the hand at the end of it on my waist. "kinda like seeing you like this," he whispers. "all protective of him. turns me on...a little."

i punch his shoulder, "nothing's gonna happen between you and i with him here. now shush, you're gonna wake him."

with my eyelids closed, the scent of red bull breath comes even closer, and before i know it, a pair of wet lips have enveloped over mine. i am caught a bit off guard because, like, our little brother is with us, and what if he wakes up? however, this doesn't seem to bother my big brother in the slightest.

there's something mellow about the kiss. it makes me feel safe and sound. i try not to make a sound or get lost in it, but i'm kinda losing it already. he tastes of sin, taurine and the colour red if red had a taste. he sticks his hand under my shirt, egging me on. we're both lowkey squishing burrito maxi in the process.

"fuck, stop, stop..!" i quickly retract.

"he's asleep," kayrem says calmly. "he ain't seein' nothin'," and attempts to find my lips again.

"i don't care. goodnight."

a moment later, kayrem snuggles his head inches away from mine and is like, "this could be us, you know. keep it, please.”

#teacher x student #love #romance #story

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evolsinner · 3 years

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⊱┊29

everything happened as my brother had said it would: rendezvous, airport, flight, airport. kayrem’s standing there, arms crossed behind his back and waiting patiently in the airport waiting area. i take a deep breath and walk up to him. he gives a curt nod to the guy and hands him an orange envelope before he leaves us.

"sister," kayrem raises his eyebrows.

i'm more comfortable hurting in silence than answering him. he pulls me into a 'brotherly' embrace and i give in effortlessly. i could really use some comfort right about now, don't really care who it's coming from.

"what happened whilst i was gone?" i murmur over his shoulder.

"it went from hectic to quiet to typical."

"and maxi?”

i know where i left things off with my little bro. the look on his small pale face, the way he stood, the way he tilted his head to the side, confused and just more confused.

"right. if you're ref~"

i get a little too comfortable in kayrem's arms, they are like cushions and blankets. a middle~aged woman going past us stares at me skeptically. the anxiety forces me to take a full step back which takes kayrem by surprise. he, nonetheless, pretends that he didn't notice and instead stuffs his hands into his trouser pockets.

"...if you're referring to what i'm assuming you're referring to~"

"about how we kissed?" i clarify blatantly.

"nah, about how we fucked. yeah, of course about how we kissed."

my face goes red so fast that i might as well be the colour red.

"he has forgotten," kayrem takes this opportunity to prove himself right. "like i told you he would when you still proceeded to freak out on me."

"you didn't have to say that..” ..about how we fucked.

"then why'd you say it," he flicks an eyebrow up.

i give him a sullen look, “let's just get home."

-ˋˏ ༻🥂༺ ˎˊ-

now this is the home i was brought up in.

automatically, something fluffy runs towards me...actually directly past me and jumps ecstatically around kayrem's legs.

"hey there, homie!" kayrem closes the door after us before crouching to pat the cutest puppy i've ever seen. "you like that, don't you?" he chuckles, tickling the back of the puppy's ears.

ummm, i feel like i've heard those words before…

"homie!" maxi runs down the stairs. "get back here, homie!" when maxi reaches the ground, he pauses, looking up at me in surprise. "rosé!" he squeals. "you're back!" and he runs straight to me, hugging my waist and snuggling his little head into my stomach.

i stumble one step back, patting his head.

"so knew you'd come back! kayrem was right!"

i give kayrem a glare. he can't just go around telling maxi that i'd return. what if i never did? then what? false hope screws with people's minds more than broken promises!

i clear my throat, "who's this, maxi?”

"this is home," maxi releases me and joins kayrem. "but his nickname is homie. do you like him? he's so cute!”

"but i thought we weren't allowed to have any pets?" i watch both of them play with what looks like an 8~week~old golden retriever.

"kayrem made mummy say 'yes'!" maxi informs me gleefully.

"uh, yeah, well," kayrem stands up, getting ready to explain himself. "maxi needed something to keep him busy for a while after you.." he pauses and is smart enough to know not to finish that sentence. so this little guy," he looks down, "we adopted him."

"right," i give them an exaggerated look. "i'm off for a shower. have fun, you two."

"honey," dad walks into the doorway.

"dad," i instantly go stiff.

he shakes his head and removes his reading glasses, standing there like a worn~out person who's just had a lot of life's misery thrown at him. i go over to him give him a hug.

"larissa is a very good friend of yours," dad says to me out of the blue. "explained why you've been acting up lately. you need to keep her close ~ that one."

"what do you mean?" i take a step back.

"all i can say is that i'm sorry for all the pressure your mother and i have put on you this past decade and more."

"dad, you don't have to apologise for anything."

"it's about time i start. but first, you need rest. you look like a wild panda."

i giggle, "sure," and i go up the stairs.

"thank you for going through all that hassle for her," i overhear dad say to kayrem and i stop at the top to listen in.

"it's no bother, fath~"

"no, kayrem, you proved yourself to me today, to this family. it really is great to have you back ~ you and her both. rosé ~ she has lost her way far too many times since that.." there's a pause. "i can't even bear to say his name. since that scoundrel drove her away from us."

'scoundrel'?

"if she knew the kind of person he really is. the things he really did~"

"father, take a breather."

wait, what? what things?

"she needs someone to look out for her, kayrem."

"of course, i understand."

dad sobs.

"father, it's alright," kayrem consoles him. "i messed up when i left the family like that. i'm partly to blame for her behaviour. i'll look after marie. i will."

i've heard enough.

#love #romance #teacher x student

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊28

it is cold, summertime coldness.

i open the door to the phone booth. there was no other place for me to go. isaac was my one and only source of safety.

"yep?" a voice responds to the number i had randomly memorised out of pure boredom when i was back at my fake home.

"helloooo," the deep voice exaggerates. "anyone there??"

and right before they were about to hang up, i'm like, "kayrem?"

there's a pause from his side.

"marie, it's you."

"yeah..."

"it's been a minute," he expresses irritably.

"i know."

"so why now?"

i didn't have anyone else to phone, so i phoned the only other person that loves me enough to help me out. i don't want to get larissa involved considering the condition she's in and the blackmail from her parents, and isaac made me put theo on a blacklist so he was out of the question.

"i need you to pick me up.”

he sighs, "where are you?"

"maples."

"the fuck, sis? how'd you end up all the way there?"

i don't answer.

"what?" he laughs like a jerk. "was that your chosen honeymoon location?"

"none of your business," i speak up.

"well, it kinda is if you want me to come and rescue you," he ridicules.

"shut up!" i snap. "i'm not some damsel in distress! or whatever the fuck! i just...” i exhale, “…i just want to come home. can you please help me?"

"you don't have to ask me twice, little sister," he words softly. "you know, i'm here for you no matter what. with that being said, i'm not gonna lie, it's taking a lot in me to not say 'i told you so' ~ he was using you this whole time."

little does he know, i've been used, and this isn't it. it just clearly shows how evidently clueless he is. i'm not in this position because of sir, but because of him. because of his dick of a self and his dick in general!

"i don't have my passport or anything with me," i change the subject to a more serious one. "how will i get back?"

"'father’ and ‘mother’, they do that lawyering shit, remember? they always have a way."

i nod...

"now, tell me, where precisely are you?"

"i'm at," i peer at the street sign, “..the corner of st. avenues and lonsdale. i think i’m lost, it’s really dark."

"right. give me a sec.." *typing* "..to look that up."

i stand there, hugging myself.

"okay, let's see what we have here. there's a restaurant right down the road from you. if you walk down lonsdale, you'll reach it within 10 mins."

"oh..." i look down the road, all i see is navy darkness.

"stay there until i get someone to pick you up and get you to the airport, okay? i'll leave now and will be there just in time for you to land."

"okay."

"will you be alright for now?"

"i guess so. thank you."

"hey, what are brothers for?" he mentions casually. "see you soon, cupcake."

'cupcake', right.

i hang up.

#love #romance #teacher x student

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊27

he can't breathe. he can't speak. he can't even break eye contact. i see the clench in his jaw, the way his pupils dilate, the way his irises glimmer with a coat of gloss forming over it. i've damaged a masterpiece and it's falling apart right in front of me. i nudge past him, making my way down the hallway.

i find a suitcase and roughly place it on top of the waterbed. the case wobbles a bit, and i unzip the lid, throwing it over. i walk over to the wardrobe, taking out a bunch of my clothes and throwing them into the suitcase with the hangers still inside.

"we can talk about it," isaac stands in the doorway.

"there's nothing to talk about," i sniff, getting another batch of clothing.

"so what? you're going to fucking leave? just like that?"

i ignore him.

"how much more immature can you get?!" he shouts lividly.

"it isn't fucking yours!!" i burst out.

"i know, babe, i know," he blinks hard. "but who's ever it is, we can talk about it."

exactly what i don't want to do.

"i'm leaving."

"okay, fine, run the fuck away if that's how low you're willing to go, because the rosé i know, wouldn't give up that easily. she'll try to work through it. she's smart, ambitious, talented, fucking extraordinary if you ask me."

"complimenting me isn't gonna get me to stay."

he walks over to me. "i adore her nose ~ this lil bump on it, the way it crinkles when she laughs, rubs against mine when she kisses me," he continues, diagnosed with lovestruck syndrome. "i adore that tiny dimple on her chin, how she gulps when she's nervous, bites her bottom lip when she's speechless."

"stop, isaac..."

"her auburn hair, her ivory skin, her love handles that perfectly pave the way to her back dimples.

i fight off a smile, blushing a little.

"i am tragically in love with her ~ that's to say the very least," he smiles warmly.

i push him away, reality kicking back in, "i cheated on you. what part of that don't you get, isaac? how aren't you pissed at me?"

"believe me, rosé, i may not look it, but i'm mad as hell. real fucking mad."

tears drip down my jaw.

"we all fuck up sometimes, we do. i did with all that hélène bullshit and you gave me a second chance. what kind of a man would i be then if i didn't give you a second chance?"

"it's complicated though…"

"i can manage 'complicated'. i'm not judging you, sweetheart. i'm just asking you to believe in us."

i sniffle.

"so please, just unpack all that," he head~nods to the suitcase. "and we'll sort whatever it is that needs to be sorted out sorted."

"i can't. i just can't!"

he steps back, bringing his hands to his head and turning away for a brief moment. "why fucking can't you, rosé?!" he spins back around. "i..." he scoffs with a tone of disbelief, "i can't believe i'm saying this right now, but i just learned that the person i'm betrothed to is carrying someone else’s child. i don't care who’s it is. all i know is that i'm willing to work through it. why can't you?"

"you don't understand."

"then help me understand, rosé, explain it to me. hell, i'm an english literature teacher, i think i'll get the hand of it pretty damn quick."

"it's not that simple, isaac! i can't~i can’t explain it!"

he groans aggravatedly, looking up at the ceiling.

"i need some space to think this through."

"'space'," he says with a scoff, rolling his eyes. "right."

" i just need time to figure things out. i'll come back."

then he heads straight to the bed and unzips the suitcase, gathering up all its contents in a heap.

"isaac, what are you doing…”

he throws my clothes back inside the wardrobe and slides the mirrored door shut after it. "i get it. i get it! you've given up, but i haven't. this whole situation is fuckin’ ridiculous to begin with and you're making it even more ridiculous by leaving! we're working through it together, whether you like it or not, and that’s final!"

i watch his heartbroken self fall apart the more he tries to remain intact.

"so," he sniffs, "the sun's about to set," he motions out the window, "and we're gonna miss it. gather yourself up and let's head over to the beach to watch it as we planned."

"i have to go…”

"you don't have to," he makes his way over to me again, a silent tear slipping from one of his eyes. "you don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

"i want to," i softly place my palm on his cheek.

he shakes his head again, snuggling his face into my palm.

"the sun has set," i say as my final goodbye.

"then, baby, we'll watch the moon together..."

i give him a small smile.

"rosé, don't walk away from me."

i force myself not to give into his sadness.

"sweatheart..."

and now there's a sky above me.

#love #romance #teacher x student

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊26

i’m in the toilet, feeling nauseous for no reason. i glance out of the ensuite bathroom and stare as isaac's peaceful body laying fast asleep on the massive queen~sized bed. i stand up to grumpily critique the reflection staring right back at me through the mirror. maybe i just have food poisoning or something.

hold up.

when was the last time i had my period…??

isaac and i have been totally safe 100% of the time. like, i'm speaking bulletproof safe. one time, we literally went in the middle of the night to get condoms. and, well, we didn't buy them per se but, like, yeah, you know.

so how?

how is it possible…if it even is possible.

my eyes open shockingly wide.

fuck.

i make the biggest revelation of my life. a quite obvious revelation that never even happened to cross my mind. it's impossible though. actually, it's quite fucking really possible! i told him to take it off. me. my words from my own mouth. not his.

kayrem.

kayrem lavanda blackburn.

my brother, and oh how i wished he was from another mother.

i fling the bathroom door shut, feeling like this revelation of mine will somehow telepathically seep into isaac's head if he wakes up and glances at me, though that bang is sure to wake him up anyway.

i cringe and lay my ear flat on the door's surface. i hear muffled snores and what seems like a change of positions in the bed, but no footsteps. so phew, i'm good, for now. i look at my tummy, then back at the mirror. i'm going to hell, aren’t i?

-ˋˏ ༻🥂༺ ˎˊ-

"wanna go gyming with me? i could teach you how to use the machinery?”

i blink, staring at the ground.

"rosé?"

"huh?" i quickly look up.

"you okay?" isaac glances at me with knitted eyebrows as he puts two scoops of protein powder inside a glass.

"yeah," i smile, swinging my legs up and down from the kitchen island. "why wouldn't i be?"

"i don't know..." he speaks with his back to me. "you seem...off," and with that, he turns on the nutribullet.

the noise, a: luckily saves me from responding, b: gives me time to cook up an answer, c: but it also blocks me from thinking properly. all it has done is make me more stressed because when it shuts off, the attention will be back on me again, and this time there will be no escape.

what do i say? how do i get out of a permanent mess? how the fuck do i remain casual about it?

silence rejoins the chat.

"so?" he turns around, holding his protein shake up.

"'so' what?"

he frowns analytically, "so is there something bothering you?"

i purse my lips and shrug, "said i was fine."

"is this about yesterday? how i tried to get you in the water?"

"no..."

"then what is it?"

"gosh, isaac," i chuckle, growing slightly angry. "i'm fine."

he's not having any of it. i should know better. he's an english lit teacher. boss of analysing crap. he knows the shifts in tones by heart, the truths protecting the lies, the tiniest bit of alterations in facial expressions and when those expressions don't match with what's being said by the mouth that's when he springs into action.

bottom line: he knows his shit very well.

he steps over to me, parting my legs to stand between them. "what's the matter? you can tell me," he encourages me in a soft tone, removing the strands of hair protecting my eyes from being looked at too closely.

"nothing," i cook up a wide smile with a subconscious gulp. "nothing's wrong," i peer into his glimmering marble eyes just to add armour on that translucent lie. "seriously," i laugh out, "all is good."

i think it's working. i think he'll leave it alo~

"tell me."

crap.

he places his protein shake aside in order to have full concentration on my little insecure self. and bam, it's friday, final period and english lit class has commenced.

"sir, last time i checked, this isn't school and you are not my teacher," i try to throw some humour in there, but it just comes out kinda bitchy.

"isaac," he corrects, irritated. "now, tell me."

"nothing is wrong."

he sighs and steps back to lean on the stovetop behind him. next, he crosses his arms, staring at me determinedly to get me to spill. boldly enough, i stare right back at him. i shouldn't feel the need to tell him every single detail of my life. scratch that. he shouldn't feel the need to know every single detail thing about my life.

he raises his eyebrows.

i roll my eyes, looking away.

"i could stand here all day, you know?" he says cockily.

"and i could sit here all day," i rebut.

he pinches the bridge of his nose.

he seems stressed. stressed about something that has absolutely nothing to do with me by the looks of it.

"did you realise something?" his question is sort of coded.

"'realise something'?" i tilt my head in perplexment.

he glances away, getting a little nervy, "yeah, like, how can i explain it. you're safe with me, rosé, you know that, right?"

why does he feel the need to keep repeating this?

"i know."

"did you hear anything about me that might've, i don't know, i guess, scared you?"

okay, now i'm really confused, "like, what?"

he clicks his tongue nonchalantly, "forget it," and grips his protein shake.

i stop him from lifting it up, "like, what?"

all of a sudden, i'm playing attack now and he's playing defence.

he, nonetheless, lifts the glass up with enough force for my hand to have no effect. he leans back again and takes a real slow sip whilst staring at me intently. sinfully, there's a gradual shift from speculating to sexualised tension. i restrict a grin and divert my attention to the ground.

when i flick my gaze back up at him, i all of a sudden feel sick to my stomach. my line of sight focuses on that mushed up protein fluid and my tastebuds imagine the most revolting taste that it possibly can.

i gag.

i jump down from the island and rush to the sink beside isaac. i puke and puke. i finally settle down. oh shit..isaac… i forgot that he's standing right next to me. i slowly stand up straight and face him.

his body is stone~cold frozen. is he petrified? mortified? mummified, most likely. i can't precisely tell because there's literally no emotion, nor movement, just eyes shining so bright that he's unknowingly giving me third~degree burns from its belonging emerald fire.

my vision begins to blur. i feel ashamed, disgusted. i've sinned and there's no way for a sinner like me to have a second chance, to look past this. he wasn't supposed to find out this way. he wasn't supposed to find out all. everything has literally fallen apart like a climax hitting rock bottom, then blowing up like the eruption of mount vesuvius.

all we see now is volcanic ash...

#love #romance #teacher x student

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊25

~a month later~

i scurry to the toilet drop to the floor, puking my lungs out. i knew i shouldn't've eaten those scrambled eggs for breakfast! just thinking of its scent makes me wanna puke some more! i head into the kitchen and tilt my head under the tap, drinking some water. after fixing my hair in the steel refrigerator's reflection, i run out onto the beach again.

"rosé!" isaac ushers for me from the beach.

i near the edge, "think i'll just stay out here, thanks!"

"get in the water!"

i shake my head.

"get in!!" he shouts.

i jump in fright.

"get in the water for me, luv, will ya?" his voice softens. “please?”

"i'm sorry! i can't! you already know that i can't swim!"

"then i'll teach ya!"

"no!"

he rolls his eyes, "babe, c’mon! sun's shining, the water's cool. it's nice in here. get wet with me for a little while, why don't ya?"

as he's saying all this, he's slowly nearing me. the water drips off his skin, his beach shorts pasting to his lean thighs. that tan skin complexion of his is melting me more than the sun from up above. and, of course, abs that could kill. i mean, i could play hopscotch on them. also, the softest feature of his, the single dimple on one side of his face, so cute!

i'm sweating and i don't know if it's due to maple's heat or because of this godly sculptured specimen right in front of me. it's like he gives me a religion to follow, then takes it away by the way he looks at me.

"isaac," i take some warning steps back, "no."

"what?" he grins, stepping onto the shore.

"i swear, don't you dare!"

he stops.

and i stop.

he stares.

i stare back.

he starts chasing me.

i scream, running away.

he catches up to me in record timing.

"no!!!" i turn around and shuffle backward.

he laughs and grabs me, throwing me over his shoulder.

"isaac!" i throw feeble punches to his back. "put me down now!"

"don't mind her," he tells a group of friends staring at us. "she's just a little too loud," and he smacks my ass.

"put me down now isaac or i swear i will kill you!"

"see?" he adds victoriously.

the friends all crack up.

"relax, babe, i'll be with you the entire time," he steps into the water. "you have nothing to worry about."

"okay, that's deep enough," i stare at the water covering his feet.

he chuckles and walks further in.

i grow quieter and quieter as the water reaches higher and higher. i have a real surreal fear of drowning and that may be reinforced due to my lack of ability to know how to swim, like no shit, rosé. but honestly speaking, i'm scared that at some point in my life i will be thrown into the middle of the deep blue sea in the vast open nowhere and i'll just keep on

sinking

and

sinking.

i will see the sky disappearing. i will feel my lungs deflating. my screams will become inaudible. and through all of it, i’ll know that no one can save me 'cause i've gone under already. blue. ocean. blue eyes. my lips grow dry, my arms squeeze the life out of my fiancé.

"right, that should be deep enough for you to cop a feel," he stops and slowly slides me down the front of his body.

"wait, no! i'm really, really scared, isaac. i'm not playing."

"i'm not going to let go of you," he assures me with all manner of jokes aside. "just, look, i'm standing, you can stand too. it isn't that deep. trust me."

my feet touch the top of the waist high water and i shiver from its coolness. now i am dipped all the way in. i've glued myself onto sir, not letting him go for the love of survival.

"you are adorable ~ a thousand times over," he grins, placing strands of my hair behind my ear.

i give me a jaded smile.

he brings his hands up to my forearms and pushes slightly against them.

"no, don't let me go! i'll drown!"

he chuckles.

slowly enough, i let him peel me off himself a little.

"see?" he smiles warmly. "not so bad, is it?"

i nod frantically, "y~yeah! not bad. can we head back now?"

“sweetheart,” he raises his eyebrows, “we're just getting started. imma take you deeper."

"no!" i push away from his arms, turning for the shore only to splash around like a live fish out of the water.

"woah, woah, woah!" isaac gives me space to do my thing; which is drown. "babe! fuck!" and he clutches me again. "damn, woman, you're touching the ground and you're still losing it!"

"it's not fucking funny!" i scream so fucking loud that the swimmers nearby hear, even the people sunbathing look up to see what the commotion is about.

"i'm not laughing, relax," he words sternly, face of stone.

"take me back, please," i plea desperately.

"rosé, you won't drown if you hold onto me. just hold onto me. i won't let go of you. i promise."

i know that he wants me to face my fears, except he's failing to realise the fear he wants me to face so badly is etched into the centre of my brain in the colour 'blue'. it's in permanent ink and equivalent in intensity as this ocean. there's no way that i could get rid of it.

he wraps one of his arms around my waist and moves steadily across the water. then weirdly, i feel lighter all of a sudden, almost like i have, “stepped off a cliff?”

“it’s a vertical drop, all normal, that’s how beaches are,” isaac informs me.

oh no, my feet aren't touching the ground anymore.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"i'm sorry," i croak out.

"what for, luv?"

"i'm bruising your arms, look?" i shift my fingers to a new spot.

he glances at his upper arms and sees the painful red crescents made by my fingernails, "nah, it’s all good, babe. didn't even notice."

i fight off a smile.

"how's it feel?" he asks with a curious grin.

and after being in his sturdy hold for a while, i feel more and more relaxed.

"i feel...free."

"free?" he repeats.

"yeah."

"that's good," he chuckles. "want me to let go of you now?"

my eyes open vagina wide, "no! no, no, no, no, no!"

"alright, alright," he laughs out. "i was just kidding, ease up."

"fuck you," i mutter grumpily.

"so..." he says in a jesting tone. "my sweetheart can't drive, can't swim and can't behave like an adult. is there anything she can do?"

"i can..eat? and sleep? and cook noodles?"

his laughter sparks a rainbow in my mind, it's like a midsummer night's daydream all of a sudden. "putting noodles in the microwave? i wouldn't jot that down as a skill."

"no?"

"a solid no."

"then what do you consider as a skill?" i glide my hand down his stomach to his s/o. "this?"

he scoffs and tenses up, "if you so much as make me go an inch hard in the water, then imma fuck you right here, right now. don't care if you can't swim."

i shift my hand away mad quickly and we both break into contagious laughter.

#love #teacher x student #cute #beach

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊24

from the tinted window's reflection, i can tell that isaac recognises her. he's staring at her ~ expressionless, and she's staring at him with one eyebrow flicked up. whilst, i, on the other hand, am staring at isaac with all the synonyms of confusion you can find in the dictionary.

what the fuck's going on?

isaac slowly puts me down and opens the door for me, "rosé, get in."

"what, no?" i turn to the model like creature behind me. "who is she?"

"no one, just get in," he doesn't even bother turning around like me.

"really? wow," she chuckles. "so you ahren't going to eentrahduce me to hair, izzy? how rude."

"please, rosé, get in," he kinda begs me.

no, i think i will not.

"who are you?" i ask the woman curiously.

she's pretty. 'bout sir's age. thick french accent. has blonde hair and olive skin. wearing a white blouse that is tucked into her black ruffle skirt. seems like she's returning from a night out...

"i'm hees wife.”

huh.

"ex~wife," isaac corrects, finally turning around.

"well, i'm yet to sign ze pahpers, so hahney, by defeenition ahnd legahlly, zat steell mahkes me your wife.”

isaac steps forward and grips her wrist tightly as she winces in pain, "tu es un serpent pour avoir fait ça devant elle."

"you hahven't chahnged one beet, hahve you?" the woman mutters between gritted teeth. "elle est mignonne. je parie qu'elle aime ta bite utilisée," and she snatches her wrist back.

"sign the papers, hélène {prn. heh~leen}, and leave me the fuck alone!" sir snarls and heads around to the driver's seat.

"chérie," she takes a step closer to me, "sahme ahdvice? leave heem. he's full of sheet; sinkeeng he cahn get whaht he wahnts when he wahnts ahnd how he wahnts. i found out ze hahrd way.” she glances at the driver’s seat and spits out, “salaud!” before strutting away.

what just happened?

-ˋˏ ༻🥂༺ ˎˊ-

"pull over."

sir continues to drive.

"i said to pull the fuck over!"

he groans exasperatedly and speeds up in a fit before slowing down and pulling over. now we sit in heartbreaking silence. silence is the one thing i hate the most. silence and liars! i feel like every promise ever made by him and by every other fucking person that i have ever met in my life has been broken. has been shattered!

"you were married this whole time," i roll the engagement ring around my finger. "this, whole, fucking, time."

"she means nothing to me," he affirms. "we are filing for a divorce. she's a nobody to me."

"i can't believe you...this."

"i love you, rosé. as a matter of fact, i don’t think i have ever stopped loving you. just don't let this minor inconvenience ruin things for us."

"you lied to me. you've been lying to me and would have still been lying had she not shown up!"

"she is irrelevant to us! to our lives! which is why i didn't tell you!"

"you don't get it, do you? it's the fact that you made me feel like it was just me. just me and you. you had me going crazy for you and all for what? to find out that you're already a married man? it's fucking embarrassing, to say the least."

"i'm 38. what'd you expect? that i'd be this perfect guy with a clean slate?" he expresses arrogantly.

i scowl and cross my arms, "i hate you."

"see, there you go again, acting fucking childish."

that's always his fucking go~to comeback and, damn, does it trigger me!

"well, what did you expect? i am 19!”

"fucking hell!" he slams his hands on the wheel. "she knew what she was doing when she came up to me, yet she did it nonetheless," he chuckles, irritated. "i'm going to fucking kill her."

i roll my eyes, "why do you always have to result everything to violence? is that why you guys are filing for a divorce?"

oops…

his head turns to me, furiousity in his unbreakable gaze, "don't even."

i shift my hand to the door.

but he locks them in advance.

"open the door, isaac."

"wow," he scoffs, "i can't believe it. you seriously think i have it in me to hurt you? you think i’m that guy?"

"i want to leave."

"and go fucking where?" he demands.

"i don't know," i sigh hopelessly.

just moments ago, we were having the time of our lives and now we're sitting here, fightin' like we've been a married couple for 6 years.

"i'm complicated, rosé, fucked up. but everything i've said to you, i meant it. i meant it."

i don't respond to him. i'm just mad at my dumb self. i'm so gullible when it comes to love. if someone looks at me for more than 3 seconds, i think it’s love at first sight. i wanna be enough and it’s exhausting. i'm empty and being with isaac makes me feel full. alive.

"i'm sorry for being untruthful," he apologises. "i tried to settle this matter with my lawyer through phone calls, but, hélène, she…she just loves the thrill of not allowing me to get what i want. a psycho is what she is."

well that explains all those phone calls…

"i didn't want her to have any part in this relationship. guess she found her way in nevertheless..."

i blink tiredly, "okay."

"what?"

"i know women. i know how they manipulate other people's relationships for exactly this to happen," i motion between us. "so it's okay.” i lean across and give him a peck on the cheek, right on top of his single dimple. "let's pack our bags now, i’m dying to get out of this old town."

he nods.

"just promise me one thing?" i add softly.

"sure?"

"no more sorries from now on?"

"no more sorries."

#poetry #teacher x student #story #romance

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊23

"babe..." isaac walks into the lolly aisle that i’m in.

we look homeless, but the funny thing is, isaac could buy out this whole stsore.

"what?" i face him.

"so, i found 'em," he holds the box of magnums up.

"that's great! let's go now," i turn around with a bunch load of snacks in my arms.

"but," he cringes.

i stop, turning back around, “’but’ what?”

“i forgot my wallet back at the hotel..."

“ugh, isaac!"

he had one job! one job!!

"i know, i know~" he starts.

obviously, he doesn't know! i throw all the snacks back into one section of the rack and grab his hand. if he's so inclined to be safe about it, then we'll have to, um, improvise.

"where're you taking me?" he hides the box under his arm.

"shhh," i whisper, "the clerk is right there."

i secretly lead us to the servo’s public restroom, quietly shutting the door after ourselves. i spin around to have isaac look down at me like i'm some strange biblical creature; one that he's very much in love, might i add. i give him a mischievous grin before crashing my lips on his.

on my tippy toes, i desperately take off his unzipped sports jacket. i run my hand along his bare chest, loving the way my fingers dip and slide over his abs.

"wait, babe, this is about you, not me."

with that, he changes positions with me so that now i'm against the wall.

"no, don't take your lips off mine," i say breathlessly, drawing him back towards me.

"i'm not," he smirks, making a point that doesn't seem to make sense.

then he kneels on the floor and levels his head with my core. my tank top stays on, but something else comes off. oh… he's impossibly close. he brings his head in between my thighs and i shiver to his warm breath vibrating off my button. he plants a very light kiss on my slit, sending shivers through me.

"i don't want you to interrupt me for this next part, sweetheart."

it's like he's talking to my vajayjay, not me.

his hands snake around the back of my thighs and reach my booty as he squeezes them in very hard fistfuls. i lift one leg over his shoulder and my fingers intertwine themselves in his silky ink hair. he swirls the tip of his tongue over my clit before sucking on it firmly.

"mmm," i relish it. "babe..this feels so g~fuck!"

i feel his lips form into a devilish grin against my skin. he flicks at my button vigorously and the follicles on my limbs turn me into a damn hedgehog. he swipes his tongue up and down my slit, then lapping up my wetness in even wetter kisses.

there's this thing he does where he bites me sometimes in the most sensitive areas for no apparent reason! it totally catches me off guard and i loathe it. i just hope that he doesn't do it ag~

"ouch!" i smack his head.

he literally bit my minora!

he chuckles and stands up, bringing his glistening mouth against mine, giving me a kiss. "how do you like the way you taste?"

i slide my hand down inside his sweats to his largely growing member. sir hides his head in the crook of my small shoulder, allowing me to pleasure him. i gently stroke my hand up and down. isaac grunts hoarsely and pastes his body further onto my curves so that i can get even better access. the pre~cum drips from his tip and i coat it down his shaft. i add more strength to my strokes and fasten the pace.

"ah..fuck, rose...”

man’s so into it that he can’t even finish my name properly.

“who’s ‘rose’, huh?”

“shut it,” he laughs.

“no, tell me, i wanna know.”

“don’t know about a ‘rose’, but i do know of a ‘rosé’ and i will be fucking her senseless in a matter of seconds. i’m going to flex my cock into her so hard and so deep that she’ll be the first woman to see god and live to tell about it. i might even spank her if she misbehaves or gets a little too greedy. all i know is that she’s mine and not a single soul can take her away from me again, and if they do, hell will be waiting for them on the other side.”

my god, i need him.

“that better, ro~sé?” he asks cockily.

“so much better.”

in my sticky palm, his dick is so hot from the rush of blood that it's feeling like it'll explode any minute now. i slow my strokes before fastening it again. to this, he literally pushes me off himself and my back hits the wall with a thud.

"i can't wait anymore!" he growls.

i bite my lip, turned on from his aggressiveness. he retrieves the box and takes out one of the gold packets. pinching the reservoir, he quickly slides it down his length. then he speedily gets rid of his sweats and yanks me forward onto his body.

"imma go at it for a while, luv," he whispers inside my ear, "so don't faint on me."

my heart rate elevates, so does my breathing, and so do my thoughts. pretty much everything hits the fan. after the first few slow thrusts, he pounds into me. his eagerness and power, it's like he won't get another chance at doing this again. i lay a hand on his chest, pushing him back, but he groans in disapproval and goes even harder.

-ˋˏ ༻🥂༺ ˎˊ-

"hey! what's going on in there!?" someone barks from the other side of the door.

shit! it's the clerk!

we both pause and look at each other ~ breathless in our respiration and reckless from our behaviour.

"i know you're in there!!" he bangs on the door. "if you're trying to steal from me, i swear on jesus, mary, joseph, i'll call the darn cops!"

isaac puts a finger to his lips, his eyes grinning.

"hey! open this door right this second! don't make me go and fetch my keys!"

i gulp.

isaac shakes his head slowly.

"alright then!" footsteps stomp away.

that's when we’re both like, "shit, shit, shit!" in unison.

we hurriedly tear ourselves off each other. i wiggle into my underwear, collecting my pj shorts. isaac rips his condom off and chucks it into the toilet bowl. he slides his briefs back up and grabs his sweats from the ground. i'm already clothed, waiting for his slow ass! he hops around, managing to put one foot in and then losing balance and almost toppling over the toilet. it's impossible for me to contain my laughter because it's just too goddamn funny.

"fuck!" he laughs out. "this is ridiculous!"

"quick! he's coming back!" i put my ear to the door.

"fuck this!" isaac clutches his sweat and jacket in his arms instead.

i open the door and we sprint out.

"oi!!" the clerk hollers. "get back in here now!!"

i rush for the glass doors, pulling them back.

“baby, it’s a push door!” isaac says from behind.

oh.

"have 'em!" as a distraction, isaac tosses the opened box of condoms at the clerk.

everything goes flying out and ends up smacking into the poor man’s face. i let go of the door, bending over to laugh. isaac bumps into me, literally smashing me into the glass exit.

"oh shit, babe!" he laughs out, hopping around me.

he helps me up and we break out into the car park, hectically weaving between vehicles to get to the right one. after reaching the bimmer, i hold onto its hood, too delirious to even think straight.

"hahahaha!" i point at isaac like a bully.

"fucking shut up!" and he puts his sweats on shamefully.

he tosses his jacket at me in a fit, his face maroon from embarrassment. i jump onto his back and he laughs along with me as he piggybacks me around to the shotgun seat. he bends down and i reach for the door handle.

"izzy? ees zat you?"

sir freezes to a woman's voice coming from behind us.

#story #teacher x student #love story #romance #poetry

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊22

i must've fallen asleep in the car because when i wake up, it's 3:00 am, and i'm in bed with a muscular arm wrapped over me. i smile, interlocking my fingers in the bruised hand at the end of it. the fingers gradually reciprocate and i'm at even more peace when i realise that isaac is also awake.

the room echoes with the soft sounds of an electric fan somewhere in the corner. there are blue led lights underneath the bed which lights the room up in a bluey lambent glow. i lift the covers off me, the heat wearing down on me like a hot summer's night.

"where're you going?" isaac questions groggily in his sexy tired voice.

the slightest movement and he thinks i'm in trouble. i imagine he's always gonna be half~awake considering everything i filled him in about. 'twas a lot, would explain why i fell asleep in the car right after.

"gee, relax, just tryna get comfortable."

he snuggles his head into the crook of my shoulder. "thought that psycho brother of yours, kayden, or whatever his name is was gonna steal you away from me again."

“new hotel?” i change the subject.

“yeah. figured a penthouse might expose us.”

"good call. hey...isaac?"

"hm?"

"can we have a black wedding?"

he chuckles, "sure."

"and rainbow bridesmaids and groomsmen?"

he laughs even harder, "i'd like to be in your head sometime, luv, as the stuff you say, brightens my day."

"well, don't get too excited because it's not all sunshine and lollipops."

"of course. anything else you want for the wedding?"

"can it be a destination wedding?"

"check."

"can we have ice cream cake?"

"yum, check."

"oh! oh! also, unicorns and pegasus' and alicorns and~"

"woah, woah, calm down, luv, that's a whole trip to wonderland."

i break into laughter.

he kisses my ear lobe, "missed you, my baby."

that tone in his voice makes me wet weak. it's my favourite one too. although, i guess if his voice affects me then i have always been fucked from the start. because, man, when he would yell in class, yeah, i would be butthurt, 'cept i would also be strangely turned on? like, the fuck was wrong with me?

"missed you too," i giggle as the nibbling travels down my ear to my neck.

"missed you a lot,” he seems to be getting at something...

"doubt it," i flip on my back.

he grins and kisses the tip of my nose. his nose kisses are by far the best. it gives me a sense of protection; humble protection at its finest. it's like springtime with yellow sunlight shining in through the drapes. a peck lands on my cheek and i crinkle my nose as i beam from its tenderness. next, a rare kiss lands on my eyelid when i blink. he’s showering me with kisses and i giggle at each random place he plants them on.

i've looked into hazel coloured orbs, and i was trapped in a painting of a forest fire. i've looked into crystal coloured orbs, and i've drowned in the deepest of oceans. and now these emerald coloured ones, i'm up there with the northern lights, lost in neverland and never do i ever wanna come back down.

i lift my head up and plant a kiss on his sugary sweet lips. an explosion of marshmallows dipped in cherry wine erupts in my mouth. i was craving his taste and this whole time i was taking the wrong doses of another.

he leans further over me and slowly slides his hands up and down my waist. the skin he leaves touched has a tingly sensation to it and goosebumps form all over me. just when i thought i've subdued the sensation, he runs his hand over the area again; there's no break for me.

his lips melt over mine like fairy floss liquefying in the stinging sun and now all i see is iridescent saliva coating his mouth. he deepens the kiss, his tongue fighting a war with mine like he's some warrior on a battlefield.

it makes me remember the first time we kissed and it wasn't even that long ago. please, god, take me back to the first time we kissed. and he does, he does take me back to the first time we kissed.

sir's hand rummages over the bedside table and some things fall down. i'm tryna keep him from ripping his lips off mine. he looks across for a few quick seconds, his hand running over random objects, then he gives up on his objective.

"god," he groans in frustration.

oh. "who cares? just pull out in time."

"luv," he raises his thick eyebrows, "don't think i could do that 'in time' on this particular occasion."

well, damn, he missed me more than i had expected.

"besides, pulling out isn't a safe form of protection," he adds.

"ugh, since when did you care about that?"

"since when i get you pregnant, i don't want it to be by accident. i want to make sure it's the best sex of your life."

i gulp.

"yes," he raises his eyebrows, amused at my shocked expression. "one of these days, i'm going to impregnate you. can't wait to see you grow big, snack on a bunch load of candy, and then have you pop out our precious little one."

i turn crimson.

"be right back," he smiles, sitting up on the bed. "i'll go check if i have some spare protection in my car," and retrieves his fallen phone.

"wait," i get up and lean onto his back. "i'm coming with."

"babe," he chuckles, "i chose the first floor for a reason. the car's right out there. i won't be long, i promise."

"please, i want to go with you," i plea like a little girl. "bad things happen every time you leave me alone."

"alright," he plants a firm kiss on my forehead, his palm resting at the nape of my neck. "let's go on an adventure to the car park, shall we?"

"race you!" i quickly jump off the bed and speed towards the door.

"hey!" he laughs out and chases me. "i wasn't ready, cheater!"

i run down the golden hallway and into the massive oval~shaped space of the reception area. the borders of the walls are painted gold and the walls themselves have a luxurious~looking pattern on it; too detailed to find out how it begins.

i pause, standing in my pyjama shorts with my eyes darting around to locate the exit.

"there!" one of the receptionists catches on and points to the revolver door right at the front.

my face lights up like the cheshire cat. the receptionist dude chuckles. he and his other three colleagues are really enjoying this little show in front of them. i mean, who wouldn't? two guests running around wildly, barefoot, in the middle of the night.

"catch me if you can, jay!" i sprint straight to the glass revolving door.

isaac reaches me a tad bit late and he just misses the slot i get into.

i stick my tongue out at him like 'ha~ha'.

he scoffs, "fuck you."

ah, yes, our 'fuck yous'. our forever and always.

i rush to the car, and once i reach it, i come to an abrupt halt.

a pair of keys jingle obnoxiously behind me.

"guess i've won, sweetheart."

i frown like a child whose third scoop of ice cream has gone crashing to the ground. "you're a cheater," i rebut, heading across to the passenger seat with my arms crossed. "plus, i meant who gets to the car first, not who gets inside."

"ah, rules, rules, rules," he mocks with a sly smile playing on his lips. "always new rules with you."

i purse my lips to stifle a grin.

he walks over to me and cages me but doesn't say anything.

"..isaac.." i break into a diffident smile, glancing away.

"what?" he chuckles.

"stop..doing that."

"'doing' what?"

"that..that eye thing."

"sweetheart, i have no idea what you're talking about."

i roll my eyes, blushing.

he continues to stare.

"see! you're doing it again!"

he laughs, leaning into me, "i can't help it, darlin’, you're just so beautiful."

"whatever," i get way too shy to make eye contact.

the bimmer beeps twice behind me.

i look at isaac with surprise.

"looks like you've won, daisy," and he opens the door for me.

i blush incredibly, chaotically even, and upon his request, i hop inside the car.

that's right, loser, i did win.

-ˋˏ ༻🥂༺ ˎˊ-

there was no, um, you know in the car, so now we’re on our way to the servo to get some.

"this is a nice song."

"you like it?" sir faces me. "it's by that french singer, ah, what's her name. right," he snaps his fingers, remembering, "'indila'."

"'une dernière danse'," i say. "what does it mean?"

he chuckles.

"what?" i beam timidly. "are you laughing at me?"

"no, it's just the way you pronounced it," he shakes his head. "it means 'one last dance', fyi."

"oh."

on the spur of the moment, isaac pulls up to the side of the road.

"what are you doing?" i query.

"an idea popped into my head," he announces. "get out of the car."

"what?"

"just do it."

i take my seatbelt off and exit the car. there, i stand in front of the windshield, freezing my ass off. it's dark as fuck, but the white headlights of the bmw give us plenty of vision. sir takes off his seatbelt and cranks the radio right up. he steps out of the car, leaves his door wide open and meets up with me.

"can you please tell me what's happening?!" i yell over the music.

"we're going to dance!" he places a hand on my waist and another on my shoulder.

"what?!" my eyes bulge out of their sockets. "in the middle of the road?! barefoot?!"

"yeah!"

"we're barely wearing any clothes!!"

"better this way!"

"what if a car comes?!"

"then we die!"

"i can't dance!"

"follow my lead!"

"sir~"

🎶je remue le ciel le jour, la nuit je danse avec le vent la pluie

the chorus hits once again, and simultaneously, isaac brings my waist closer to himself as he takes a full step back. i follow his lead, letting him guide me. backward, left side, forward, right side.

🎶et dans le bruit, je cours et j'ai peur est-ce mon tour? vient la douleur

"oops..!" i step on his foot by accident. "sorry..!"

"don't worry!" he chuckles, twirling me around. "you're doing amazing!"

he repeats the steps, nodding at me supportively. a few vehicles begin pulling up to watch us dance! the rest, however, honk impatiently, heading around to get past us.

🎶je remue le ciel le jour, la nuit je danse avec le vent la pluie

the steps are sped up and repeated one final time before everything slows down to a finale. confidently, isaac pauses and dips me. i stare at him in total awe. i think he's in love, like, really in love.

🎶et je m'envole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole

the few drunken humans gathered around us erupt with applause, whistling here and there.

"i love you," sir mouths, bringing me back up.

guys, i think he loves me.

#love #romance #teacher x student

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊21

"are you okay?"

theo tries to make some sort of small talk with me and i fucking hate it.

"rosé?"

"do you really like larissa?" i face him, contemptuous. "or is it just some sick way of you~"

"i like her," he intercepts. "a lot."

i nod, my eyes drifting away. good. at least now i know he's not using her the way he used me.

"that night," he starts, and fucking hell, he brings it right back to the front of my head like it's nothing. "coach gave me shit for our players being on juice. my boys know not to do none of that risky shit when it comes to semi~finals and grand finals, but coach blew it out of proportion. i wanted to get my mind off it, but when you said you didn't want to..like..do it.." he clears his throat, "i'm just..." he shakes his head and starts again, "i'm sorry. i was a massive dick to you. sorry."

he keeps apologising, but none of it makes me feel any better. is he just trying to make himself feel better?

"sorry is just a word…”

"sorry, i.." he realises he said it again and mentally beats himself up for it. "shit. uh, sorry, i didn't me.." and again. "fuck, forget it."

a mess, he is.

"but we..we had fun times, didn't we?"

i laugh, not at all happy, "you took me to every party and just talked to your friends. you had me with the sweet talk, but then beat me down like trash talk. yeah, what fun times they were, weren't they?"

he nods slowly, speechless.

“..you were standing there like an angry god. i was so scared, theo..”

“i’m so, so sorry, rosé. i don’t expect you to forgive me, i just want you to know that i’m sorry.”

it's silent for a few, but not for long.

"i don't go around raping girls. i'm not like that."

"but you had one stupid argument with your coach and thought it'd be a perfect idea?"

"definitely not," he affirms.

"pfft. whatever."

"to be fucking honest with you, i don't know what came over me. i fucked up and what i did to you was fucked up. that's all i know and i take full responsibility for my actions that night."

"if you really took full responsibility for your actions, you'd turn yourself in."

he faces me like 'you're not serious?'

"and why feel the need to bring the cops in?" i point out. "why couldn't you just let us be?"

he exhales, "i saw how you looked at him. i wanted that. i kind of...had a..crush on you," a tint of pink warms up his cheeks.

"a crush on me?" to actually hear him say it, it hits different. "you hated me, theo, bullied me, to be exact.”

"uh, yeah..." he gives me a nervous chuckle. "the thing is, it's easy for me to talk to girls i don't like. but when it's with ones that i do like, i don't know how to act."

"i don't believe you."

"don’t, but you know that day at your locker? when i finally cooked up the courage to speak to you for more than 5 seconds? yeah, well, i was practically shitting my pants."

i giggle, stopping myself midway, i’m not supposed to be laughing, "sure."

"what," he laughs boyishly, "i'm telling the truth."

"'kay," i shrug with an amused expression. "y'know, it's fine. the only real reason we ever got together was because we were both just a couple of horny schoolkids.”

"aye, nah, we were somethin'."

"okay then, tell me one thing you know about me?"

"uhhh, you've really put me on the spot here."

"what's my favourite colour?" i give him something simple.

"purp..blu..rainbow?" he cringes.

"really? you didn't know so you chose all of them?"

"haha, sorry. yeah, you're right, i guess ~ about us, after all."

i, later on, make a call to isaac with theo's phone, and in about 30 minutes of driving in conflicting silence, i could see the white bmw suv that isaac had replaced with the stelvio to lessen our chances of getting caught.

"pull over," i break the silence, "that's him there.”

we see isaac slam on the brakes and the bimmer goes skidding to a harsh halt. he steps out of the car, raking his hands through his ink black hair whilst walking to me like a god. holy hell, he looks like a total mess. his white dress shirt is unbuttoned from top to bottom and the wind sweeps through it, forcing both sides to fly up into the air.

"damn..." theo whispers as we both stare through the windshield.

'damn', it is.

"i always thought you were fragile, you know?" theo confesses out of the blue as we both watch my love walk towards the truck. "and you are."

i frown in confusion.

"just not like a flower," he elaborates, "but like a bomb."

a hint of a smile appears on my face at his weird flattering remark.

"you really love him, don't you?" he asks.

i just look at him, and telepathically, he understands that i really do. then i step out of the truck.

"hey!" theo leans over. "what's your favourite colour?"

i scoff, "don't have one.”

“huh,” he smiles, “i would have never guessed.”

i shrug.

“take care, baby?” he plays that same joke he would play on me back in high school.

“you too, theo,” and i shut the door after myself.

the chilly evening air ruffles through my hair. isaac breaks into a run, and to get faster to him, i do the exact same. we crash into each other arms and he spins me around and around in the middle of an empty cold road. this feeling...this is home. this is where i was born to be. and like a smashed antique vase video in reverse, i am healed.

"you drove me insane, rosé blackburn," he expresses in deep solace. "fucking insane."

i'm feeling no pain, no fear. i want this moment to be put on pause so that i could live in it for an eternity. this past week was hell for me with glimmers of impure desires and now i'm in one hell of heaven with a god embracing me in his secure arms. it couldn't get any better than this.

"you smell of liquor," i sniff.

"you're to blame, darlin'."

suddenly, all tightness around me loosens and i feel like a glued vase breaking apart again. “what’s wrong?” i look up at Isaac, but he’s not looking back at me, he’s looking over my head.

"what the fuck is he doing here?"

theo. he has stepped out of his vehicle and is awkwardly waiting with his hands stuffed in his trouser pockets for whatever it is that he's waiting for. is it a 'thank you'? is it a 'goodbye'? i don't freaking know! i thought he would have left by now.

isaac releases me and heads directly to him, "came back for seconds, huh, jameson?!"

i sigh, this cannot be happening again, "isaac, wait."

"i've killed you in my dreams, i've killed you in my nightmares, but boy," sir chuckles, "i cannot wait to kill you in real life!"

theo puts his arms up, "it's not..not what it l~"

isaac grabs him by the collar and smashes him against the door of the truck which forces it shut.

"listen, i was just.." theo tries again.

isaac lifts him up and slams him on the hood. theo rolls off, landing roughly on the asphalt. he tries to shift back, but isaac's already on top of him. one blow, two blows, three blows, six. the bullets are leaving sir's fists and landing repeatedly on the right side of theo's face.

his cheekbone turns into such a gorgeous lavender field: colours of purple, mauveine, lilac, periwinkle, violet. it's mesmerising. and yeah, i know i said i didn't have a favourite colour, but i think this is it. lavender. though it’s quick to be ruined by gooey red blood oozing out of the cuts forming on theo’s face.

"isaac, you..you need to stop..!"

"no, don't!" theo tells me. "i deserve it!"

isaac lifts theo's head up and smashes it back down with the thought in mind to literally crack his skull open.

"he helped me!" i announce to the world.

"what!?" isaac fumes, the skin of his knuckles have split open.

"he's the one that helped me escape."

"he helped you!?"

"yes, please don't hurt him anymore."

isaac breathes out heavily through his nose, heartbroken that there's a valid reason for him to stop {not because it'll be murder}. he pulls theo's head up by the collar, "if i ever, if i ever see you again, i will rip out your entrails and shove them down your throat. do you understand, jameson?"

"i..i," theo chokes on his own blood. "i under..st.."

"answer me!"

"he's trying to!" i butt in. "h~he's in pain! can't you see?!"

"nod if you understand!" isaac demands instead, no sympathy at all.

theo nods quickly.

"good," isaac spits out a ball of saliva next to him before standing up.

theo’s bloodshot angel eyes sends sorrows through me. what’s worse is that he looks at me with them. “s~sorry, rosé..” and he coughs up some more blood.

apology accepted. i wish he knew he’s forgiven now. it’s okay. it’s fine. all i can do is nod back at him.

theo smiles a little, but it’s such a small smile, it’s so faded, i hurt for him. he grimaces as he tries to pull his body back to lean upright on the front of his truck; literally to stop himself from drowning in the blood pooling at the back of his throat. i’m afraid he won’t make it out of the middle of the road in time, it’s so dark, cars won’t be able to see him.

“isaac, i think we should call triple zero, he doesn’t look too~”

“we’re not calling anyone.”

“but isaac, look at him.”

he doesn’t look at him.

so i take it into my own hands.

“if you fucking touch him, sweetheart, we’re done.”

“what?” i stare at isaac, wide~eyed and confused.

“i won’t repeat myself.”

roughly, so roughly, isaac grabs my arm and escorts me back to the bimmer. his hold on me is so tight, it’s giving me actual bruises.

“ow, isaac, stop, it’s hurting.”

“you’re mine, rosé.”

“you’re really hurting me right now,” i poke my fingers underneath his grip to make some space.

"HE FUCKING RAPED YOU,” sir stops to roar at me. “HOW IN THE HELL ARE YOU FEELING SORRY FOR HIM?”

“YOU DON’T ALWAYS HAVE TO DO THAT THOUGH.”

“’do’ what?!”

“that!” i point to theo in the distance.

sir laughs, “allow me to repeat myself to you this one time. baby: he. fucking. raped you.” he tells me like i’m a 2 year old. “what was i supposed to do when i saw him, 'hey, thanks for giving my fiancée whom you sexually assaulted not long ago a ride?', don't fucking think so luv now walk!"

i scoff.

"look, i get it," isaac sighs. "or perhaps i don't. i just know that when i picked you up on the night of, i had never seen you that destroyed. it absolutely wrecked me to the point where i went home and smashed every fucking thing in my house. i wanted to, i wanted to go back so fucking badly and finish him, but hearing your voice in my head...hearing you say 'i love you' is the only thing that made me stay sane."

he was this affected?

"i mean it, sweetheart, please," he begs, "i don't care for whatever reason, i do not want him around you ~ once a rapist, always a rapist.”

i nod, sucking up my tears and jumping into his arms.

#teacher x student #love #romance #sad #poetry

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊20

when i reach the top of the stairs, i hear maxi and kayrem laughing behind the closed door. it's good to hear maxi laughing again, it makes my soul happy. though, i am beyond petrified that kayrem's door will open and everything will be for nothing.

i enter my bedroom and rush straight to the desk in front of my bed. shuffling aside some papers, i don’t find anything. i check my desk’s second and third drawer ~ same shit, nothing. where the fuck is it?! where did i put it?! i backtrack in my mind to the moment i took it off and placed it away.

yes! my nightstand!

i spin around, but before i can take another step forward, i jump in fright. a figure leans on the doorframe with their arms crossed and eyes directly resting on me. my heart is beating so hard that any one of these beats could lead me to a heart attack.

"looking for something?" kayrem asks sarcastically.

"i..uhh...i was just.."

he raises his eyebrows, scoffing.

"i was looking for a pen," i shoot back.

"a pen?"

i nod.

an irritated smile forms on his face, “god, you’re pathetic,” and shakes his head.

“excuse me?” i scowl.

"maxi told me. everything. at first, i thought, you couldn't possibly be that dumb, but then, here you are: dressed like some lowlife robber and looking for some last~minute item. fuckin’ pathetic, like i said."

i ignore his remarks and pull out the first wooden drawer in my nightstand, there lays my engagement ring. so much thought had gone into this token that there's no way in heaven or hell i'll leave it behind. i secretively place it inside my pocket before meeting my scan with the obstacle blocking my way.

"i'm going and you can't stop me," i head towards the exit.

he quickly steps into the middle of the doorframe, "i don't get why you're trying to break this family apart? i fucking don't get it?!" he stresses with a chuckle. "how hard is it to be a daughter to your parents and a sister to max~"

"a sister to you?" i fill in for him. "because last time i checked, siblings don't fuck each other. so kayrem, i don't consider you as my brother. now please, move."

he glowers, "bit harsh, lil sis?"

"it's the truth."

strangely, i see him look behind me for a quick second, and i copy him. underneath my pillow, i see something black poking out. no way. this dumbass. these past few days, he's been creeping into my room at night so we could cuddle, but i didn't realise he's left his...

i go for it.

he does the exact same, grabbing my waist, tryna stop me.

"stay the fuck back or i'll shoot you!" i point the gun at him.

"woah! hey! relax!" he quickly puts his hands up, backing up. "it's not a fucking toy!"

"i'm leaving!"

"first, listen to me."

"ain't listening to shit!"

"you're not gonna shoot me, babysis, i'm your brother."

"i'm the one with the gun right now so please," i blow my fringe out of my face, "don't you dare fucking test me."

"do you even know how that thing works?" he nods to it.

"um, pull the trigger?" i chuckle. "how hard can it be?"

"that's a beretta 92fs 9mm pistol," he slowly steps forward. "it's a double, single action semi auto~"

"i didn't ask for specs!”

"you won't shoot me," he says again, stepping closer.

my hands begin shaking, "b~b~back the fuck up or i swear i'll pull the trigger!”

"baby, how you gonna shoot me with the safety still on?"

i glance at the gun, right then, he snatches it off me, spins me around and glues me against the door. here’s me trying to free myself and here’s him suffocating me the more i try.

"not so brave now, are we?"

"mum!!!"

"mother's not home right now, she can't save you."

"maximus! call triple zero! say our psycho brother is tryna kill us!"

"the tv's on high, he can't hear you."

he slowly runs the pistol down my black skinny jeans to my inner thighs. i press my back on the door, thinking it'll turn into some kinda portal and i can fall through it. butterflies are beginning to flutter around somewhere, but not in my stomach...

"bet you like this," he toys with me. "jesus, you fucking like it, don't you?"

i gulp.

"safety's now off..." he whispers and presses the barrel against my kitty.

"a~are you gonna like what? shoot my pussy with your stupid gun?"

"no, i wanna shove my 'stupid gun' up it," he presses the tip of the pistol deeper onto my core, rubbing it back and forth a bit. "if i had it my way, i would've fucked you with this by now."

"why don't you then?" i spit out.

he throws the gun on the bed, "follow it then."

“hate you,” i seethe.

he bites his bottom lip in anger that he isn't willing to express verbally. "why's it so hard for you to look me in the eye?"

it’s true, i can’t. it’s these feelings i have for him. i don't wanna try and understand them because a part of me is scared of what it'll discover. if i don't think about it, then it cannot take the form of actions. so that's what i'm trying to do ~ not think about him.

"we used to watch the stars and give them names," he whispers, forcing me to do the exact opposite of what i'm training my thoughts not to do. "we used to play outside until the crickets woke up.”

“look, kayrem, i wasn’t in the…in the right mindset when i g~gave into you that night,” i squirm on the doorframe in discomfit. “just please let me leave.”

“i’m sick of doing it solo, marie, so sick of it!” he snaps.

solo?

“i want to be between your legs again,” he brings his mouth to the dip in my neck.

i squeeze my thighs shut tightly.

“i want to hear you moan, to scream, to beg for more.”

i'm extremely grateful that my ugly oversize jacket is covering most of me up; 'cause if any more of his skin comes into contact with mine, i know for a fact i'll lose all self~control. he delicately brushes his lips along the curve of my neck like a feather. i feel as if i'm some hotplate and he doesn't want to burn his lips.

though he's fire and why would fire be afraid to burn?

“i want to fuck you, marie.”

“no,” please do.

"am i making you wet?"

“no,” very.

"i know you like it rough...”

“no,” i do.

“i can call a mate, we can fill you up from both ends. i just want to give it to you so rough. i want to ruin you, control you, make you mine."

he is ruining me, he is controlling me and i'm definitely not his!

then he stares at me with that look in his eye and the entire room lights up. my whole body lights up. he drifts his focus down the bridge of my nose to my lips, my parted lips. he leans in and kisses me gently enough to kill me. another gentle kiss lands on my bottom lip.

when he savours my taste for a second, he comes in for thirds. i open my mouth at the exact time as his, which blocks his course of action. i notice how a surge of vicious lust ripples through him and he swoops his tongue right inside my mouth, literally licking me like a lollipop. and now there's no space in between us. i grab ahold of his sleeveless arms which are as warm as a day spent in a cabin through a wintery night.

i moan lightly, expressing the desire to burn some more. he slowly slides his hands underneath my jacket and i can feel the heat radiate to places it shouldn't. i'm an ice block and he's melting me damn effortlessly. when each flaming hand presses down on each side of my bare waist, i wake up. i rip my eyes open and push his chest away.

"i'm sorry, we can't.”

"cupcake..." he whispers, tilting his head to the side.

i shake my head.

he kisses me again, like he’s tryna convince me with his kisses that we can. with his mouth on mine, he lifts my head back up to eye level with him. my self~control is deteriorating at an alarming rate. then,

"...rosé?"

a voice arises from behind.

i shove kayrem away incredibly fast.

"wha..what are you and kayrem doing?" maxi words innocently with a puzzled expression.

i look straight back into kayrem's eyes. my heart has stopped, like, it has literally just stopped.

"buddy, why don't you head back inside my room?" kayrem holds my eye contact, so serious but so calm.

"but..why were you kissing rosé?"

when he actually says it, like, actually says it, i don't know about kayrem, but i feel fucking nauseated with myself. i glance away, can't even bear to look in my little brother's direction. he. saw. us. kissing. point~blank.

"now," kayrem says aggressively this time.

maxi obeys.

"h~h~he saw us," i stammer. "kayrem, he fucking saw us."

"i know.”

“he s~saw us, kayrem.”

“i know.”

“he~”

“breathe, marie, breathe.”

“k~kayrem, i c~can’t,” i think i’m having something like a panic attack.

"it's fucking okay, marie, he'll forget about it by, like, overnight. there's nothing to be worried about.”

"he won't forget about it!"

"he will, marie, stop freaking yourself out."

"he'll tell m~mum..then mum will tell d~dad and~and.."

"stop," kayrem blinks hard. “please, stop.”

"..only god knows what they'll.."

"stop."

"..think. but i know for a fact that~"

"stop it!"

i stop.

"hey,” he caresses the back of his fingers across my cheek, "it's not a problem until it's a problem, okay? you're just getting ahead of yourself a little there. forget about it, that's all you need to do."

“i can't, lavanda…"

kayrem’s wholes demeanour changes to nostalgia mixed with melancholia, guilt preserved with regret and sadness feeling happiness for the first time. it’s overwhelming to watch, imagine being the person experiencing it.

“thought you’d never call me that again.”

same…

his intentions, it’s like he doesn’t even know how much of a contradiction he is to himself and i. i won’t forgive myself if i give into him again. he’s nothing but another reason why i shouldn’t be here. instead of further going inside the room like he wants me to, i go the other way. i leave. he lets me leave.

"you'll come back," he states behind me. "i know you will."

"take care of maxi for me," is the only thing i say.

bottom of the staircase. pathway. grass. asphalt. raptor.

🎶if a genie gave me three wishes i'd pay back my school tuition and spend the rest on two bitches uh huh

"shit, you're back," theo sits up, exhaling vapour and fanning away the smoke. he gets rid of his vape and shuts off the radio. "i thought something bad had happened. did you find the thingy?"

"yeah," i sniffle.

"great..great. where to now?"

"just drive."

#teacher x student #poetry #aesthetic #siblinglove

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊19

it’s the day, 9:40 pm.

"rosé, have fun for me," maxi says as we're hugging it out.

i squeeze the life out of him. i don't want to release him. i don't want to ever forget this feeling.

"i can't breathe," he manages to say.

"sorry,” i release him.

"you're crying,” he frowns. "pwease don't cry,” he lifts up his small hands to my cheeks and wipes away my tears. "don't worry, i won't be mad this time. i promise. you should go now before mummy and daddy come back."

"maxi," i sniffle, "i just want you to know that in life when you want something, you go and get it. don't let anyone ever bring you down and make you feel bad about putting yourself first, okay?"

"i won't,” he gives me a jaded smile. “i love you."

"'step on a lego for me' love me?"

he giggles, "'step on a lego for you' love you.”

"okay, now," i sniff, "you have to listen to this next part very carefully, okay?"

he nods.

"you have to distract kayrem and keep him away from the windows so that he doesn't see me leave, understand? take your homework with you and ask him that you need some help with it. do you think you can do all that for me?"

"yes, i can do it," he nods determinedly. "but, rosé, aren't you going to say goodbye to kayrem too?"

"i..um..i did already, maxi ~ yesterday. but he can't see me leave otherwise he might try and stop me and then i will be trapped again. you don't want that to happen, do you?"

he shakes his head. "but why will he stop you?"

"i don't know, maxi. sometimes people just want to have things their way and his way is not allowing me to have things my way."

"i'm confusion..."

i giggle and pull him into another quick embrace. "you'll understand when you're older. alright, now, go!" i usher him to kayrem's room. "your mission has just begun, maximus blackburn."

he takes a deep breath in and gives me one final smile before picking up his worksheets and running over to kayrem's room. he halts, glancing at me. i nod at him approvingly and then he knocks on the door. the door swings open and i quickly hide in the corner.

"hey, buddy," kayrem crouches to meet maxi's height. "sorry, don't think i can play any video games tonight. got some work that needs doing."

"can..can you help me with my maths homework? i don't get it."

"maths? maybe ask marie? she's good at that shit..stuff, i mean."

"no, rosé failed maths class twice. she said someone decided to put letters into the equations, so she decided to subtract herself."

i facepalm, can’t believe he still remembers me telling him that. it was so last year.

kayrem chuckles, "she said that?"

"uh, yeah? can i come in now?"

"ight, go ahead."

and the door shuts after them.

it's go time.

i lift the duffle bag's strap over my shoulder and silently head down the stairs, taking a quick glance at my watch. it's currently 10:07 pm. i grip the doorknob and twist it, stepping outside onto the wavy footpath that cuts through the middle of the lawn.

theo has parked to the side, quite hidden, and he flashes his headlights once to let me know where he is. i cut through the freshly~cut lawn. it's kinda funny because a few months ago it was him who i was running away from and now i'm running to him. it's lowkey fucked up. but what about this isn’t fucked up?

i throw my bag into the back of the truck and look down at both sides of the road; mum and dad could be back any minute now.

hastily, i get inside, "start it. hurry."

the engine turns on and the wheels scrape the ground.

deep in thought, i crack my fingers. something isn't right. something is missing. i look down at my finger to see if my eyes can confirm this. oh no... no!! shit! shit! shit! i take a quick glance over my shoulder to the house and with each second i waste away, the further it leaves my view.

"wait!" i scream out.

"what?" theo jumps in fright.

"hit the brakes!"

and he does, pulling over.

"i forgot something."

"shit. really?"

i nod, there shouldn't be any need for contemplation, yet my mind gets ahead of me.

"is..is it important?" theo doubts himself in asking this question.

and i know why he does because it's basically like walking on eggshells with me. who’s to blame for this though? not i. i give him a bitter look and exhale frustratedly. argh! i’m fucking stupid!

"i'll be right back!” i hop out.

#story #teacher x student #poetry

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evolsinner · 3 years

Text

⊱┊18

i am starting to slowly gain my parents' trust again. i was their perfect daughter once and now i'm becoming 'her' again, or so they think. the thing is, when i have an idea in my head there's no doubt that i won't execute it nor is there anybody there that can stop me from doing so.

"hey, babe," i call larissa again. "so i was thinking, you should come over? my parents don't seem to care and i'm dying of boredom. how about it? oh, and i promise it has nothing to do with isaac, so you don't have to worry about any of that," i add for the sake of it.

"why, i'd love that, babe," another voice responds; a deeper voice. "so tonight? or tomorrow night?"

i pause.

he knows my weakness.

it’s himself.

now imagine having that kinda power over someone?

"i know you're there, rosé, i can hear you breathing."

i never thought that i could feel this powerful hatred again.

he sighs, "when can we be friends again??"

"maybe, never?"

"far, man," he replies frustratedly. "i don't understand what you think i did to you, but whatever it is~"

"i don't want to talk to you. where's larissa? give the phone to her."

"listen, i~"

"no."

"ro~"

"no."

"i~"

"give the phone to larissa!”

"how can i make it up to you?!”

the more i hear his irritating voice, the more i remember how deceitfully cunning it was when i fell for it last year. i know for a fact that he isn't in denial, he's waaay too smart for that. he's manipulative, point~blank. everything is always the victim's fault when it comes to boys like him.

"hey, who is that on the phone?"

i hear larissa's voice in the background.

"is it rosé?"

"yeah, it's her," theo answers, exhaling like he lost the chance or something. "here."

"w~wait," i hesitantly stop him.

"one sec," he tells larissa.

"there might be a way for you to make it up to me."

"really? what is it? i'd do anything, rosé," he murmurs.

"are you able to excuse yourself right now?" i ask him.

"hey, was that your mum?" theo questions.

"no?" i answer dumbly.

"i think i heard your mum call for you or something?"

"really?" larissa's voice arises. "i didn't hear anything… watevs, i'll be right back."

"okay, i got us a minute or two, what's up?" theo speaks into the phone.

"you said you'd do anything for me, right?" i feel sick to my stomach, and i mean, really sick. how low can one get to be at that point in life where they have to ask their rapist for help?

"anything," he solidifies.

brick~hard flashbacks of theo's angel blue eyes pool my mind. they haunt me to sleep every single night. i'm almost always drowning in them whilst i dream. in my nightmares, i even search for satan's orbs to assuage me from the pain of those crystal irises. no matter what i do, no matter how hard i try, i still see his

angel blue eyes

staring

right back at me.

i drift my scan at the emerald green rug to ease my mind. "i'll text you the address of the place i'm currently staying at, delete it later. you need to be there at exactly 10 pm ~ no sooner, no later."

"what for?"

"then wait for me," i beat around his question.

"holll up,” he talks under his breath in revelation. "you want me to be your getaway driver?"

"be there, theo," i quickly hang up.

he can never make it up to me. not in this life, not in another. even if we could go back in time, he still wouldn't have the slightest chance. so the fucking fact that he thinks he does, amazes me to the point of no return. is it really possible for this aesthetic piece of art to be this pathetic?

my ploy is simple: theo used me, so imma use him.

#sad #life #poetry #story

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