actuallylukedanes

[actuallylukedanes]

If I ask nicely will people reblog this and tell me what their most common breakfast is? Not your favorite necessarily, just what you have for breakfast most frequently? 🙏🏽

#cereal #a bagel #a bagel sandwich #a croissant #hot chocolate #tea #water #a yoghurt bowl if i'm feeling fancy #or if i just have yoghurt to use up lol

[actuallylukedanes]

Preview of Sam Long’s story, drawn by the amazing Cynthia Yuan Cheng! (@cynthiaycheng, cynthiaycheng.com)

Becoming Who We Are Kickstarter ends Dec 14! Preorder now to help us fund the book!

bit.ly/becomingkickstarter

#this seems amazing #this is me #no i am not the writer #i am a twin #who feared being so different from my twin sister #who was always so different #and tried so hard to fit in #so hard it broke me so often #and i learned the hard way to be myself #even if myself was trans #even if myself was non-binary #even if myself was different #and queer #twins #twin life is amazing #but twin life can also be complicated

[actuallylukedanes]

Okay. Elliot Page would be a great choice. As would Elliot Fletcher.

Let's get this done!

#people who are ridiculous are mentioned in this post #one person i mean #i refuse to tag him because i don't want his name as a tag on my tumblr #my vote is for elliot page as james bond #but elliot fletcher would be equally good #who else....what other (trans) men would be good as the next james bond? #how about we go with Jamie or Jane Bond instead an go with a trans woman

[actuallylukedanes]

tumblr made changes again and my dashboard looks all.....wrong. and posting format looks....weird. and why are the options for different things on the left now? And how do I check my followers and following???

ugh.

#tumblr changed again

[actuallylukedanes]

The most heartbreaking thing this morning. We’re not pregnant. Again. 7th time we’ve tried.

And to make matters so much worse....as much as I’d like to try again....we are completely out of money for any more tries. This was our first IUI. We’d tried 6 times before just the regular way. So now there’s no more money. And no way of getting a hole of any more money.

B didn’t qualify for the loan. Because our debts are too high. Even though she makes 111,000 a year.

#infertility #loans #heartbreak #7th time trying still didn't work #outcome of first iui

[actuallylukedanes]

On Tuesday, May 30th, my blog was TEN YEARS OLD. Pretty cool. I feel bad I don’t use it very often though.

Happy Anniversary, little blog. :)

[actuallylukedanes]

#trans rights are human rights #i don't get why she was censored #like i have kept up with this story and i still don't understand how it was a legal move #zooey zephyr

[actuallylukedanes]

It isn’t okay to tell someone you want to drive into a ditch......and then leave. Without resolving anything. Or acknowledging anything important. I try so hard to be an anchor for you.

But you don’t have any room in your emotions or in your head for me and who I am and how I feel. 

#brie

[actuallylukedanes]

Blorbo Ask Game from forever ago

@actuallylorelaigilmore also asked for Sense8, Firefly and The Magicians....

You can read The L Word one here.

Sense8

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): Nomi.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): Lito.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): Sun.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): Puck.

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): Jonas.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): Rajan.

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): Whispers.

That one was short, I had no comments partially because you’ve never seen it and even though you’ve heard it in the background...I wouldn’t want to spoil it.

So, here’s firefly too...

Firefly

blorbo: Simon scrunkly: River Scrimblo bimblo: Yosaffbridge Glup Shitto: Nandi Poor Little Meow Meow: Mal  Horse Plinko: Book, because we never get to discover who he actually is, but also Mal (because Nathan Fillion). Also, Atherton Wing. Eeby Deeby: Niska and Early.

The Magicians

In order of those questions...

Quentin Eliot Josh Professor Lipson Julia, Penny Tick, Kady, Henry Tod, Marina

#asks #ask game #ask #blorbo ask game #blorbo sense8 #blorbo firefly #blorbo the magicians

[actuallylukedanes]

blorbo ask games from a long time ago

@actuallylorelaigilmore also asked for The L Word (Original), Sense8, Firefly and The Magicians.... You can read Sex Education (tv series) here.

So, here we are with the next on the list..

The L Word (Original) *I’d much rather do Gen Q now that we’re in S3 but I think I complained about that enough...

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): Not actually my favourite character, but the one I think about the most, that I spend time in my head wondering about and exploring is Bette Porter.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): From the original? Dana, probably.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): Kit

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): Lara until things went south with Dana. After that, probably Peggy because Holland Taylor.

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): From the original, probably Shane. But I also loved Max a lot -- even if I cannot like or enjoy the very upsetting stuff they did to his character and the way they treated the actor and a whole host of other problematic shit that went on for both during the show.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): Jenny. I really hate her and always did. Helena, just from her first appearance in s2, not after that. 

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): So many actually. Tim. Jenny. Tina (I have my reasons and we can get into why I think she’s horrible later, lol).  Angus, but only after the cheating. Jodi, but only after she used Bette for an art installation -- no matter how hurt and angry she was. Cherie Jaffe, because really. Dylan.

#blorbo ask game #asks #ask #ask game #the l word blorbo

[actuallylukedanes]

more shows for the blorbo ask game! sex education, the l word (original), sense8, firefly, the magicians

Well, this was literally forever ago, but here I am answering it. Finally. Okay, so "forever" is an overdramatisation, but still. (The last one was 10 months ago).

So, then.....

Sex Education: blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): I think the majority of these characters are problematic and cringey, at most times. And at other times, I just can't relate to them. With that said, Adam Groff is my favourite character and the one I think about most often. scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): I don't have any idea what So Shaped means, but the character that gives me cuteness aggression, or at least the one I'd most like to protect is Aimee. scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): Jackson or Ruby. glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): I wouldn't feel this way at all without you, Toni, because you've made me love Hannah Wattingham...so for this answer I gotta go with Sofia Marchetti aka Jackson's mum. poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): Not controversial, of course, but probably unpopular and otherwise a pathetic fave to have....Peter Groff, because he's played by Jason Isaacs. horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): Otis. He's the main character, but I just can't stand him. eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): Eric, during season 3 only -- I will never understand why they did that, never.

You can read the Blorbo Ask Game from ten months ago here.

#blorbo ask game #asks #ask #ask game #blorbo #sex education blorbo

[actuallylukedanes]

L Word Gen Q Season 3 sucks. It is so bad. The writing is terrible. The characters don’t make sense.

SPOILERS AHEAD

Why did Shane cheat on Tess to then realise Tess is the only one for her and beg to come back?

Why did they kill off Tess’s mom that quickly? Poor Tess. Who treated Shane like crap for months only to think there wouldn’t be any consequences.

But Shane is a total idiot. What sort of asshole cheats on someone as a means to highlight a problem in a relationship rather than just sitting your partner the fuck down and talking to them? No one deserves to be cheated on. No one.

Why did Sophie break up with Finley? It makes no sense at all; supposedly Finley made her feel the most like herself - at least that’s what she said all of S1 and S2. Just ridiculous. I think Fin needs to move on anyway, honestly, and be with someone more worth it who didn’t ditch her over so that “everything is about me.” No relationship, including friendships, are all about you, Soph. Immature, asinine, creep.

Why did they do a whole musical episode? It was revealing, yes, but it was also awful. 

Why is Alice the least introspective person ever? How was she NOT aware that she compares every single person to Dana and no one ever measures up? I could have told you that in Season 5 of the original L Word.

I missed Tom. It’s sad that they’ve written him out of the show by giving him a new partner and baby with only 2% context. But Alice was an idiot.

Who’s the one for Alice? That plot doesn’t seem like it has anywhere to go.

I love Dani, but I preferred her with Gigi. Why did they do Gigi so dirty? Like that actress was meant to be on the show, and Dani/Gigi are meant for each other. Why on earth do the writers think we don’t deserve committed, faithful, not-fucked-up relationships? (And by we, I mean queer people and LGBTQ+ people).

I hate that Bette/Tina got back together. And I know I’m alone in feeling that way; but I 100% hate it. Every single time they’ve broken up, Tina has gone to the hate button in three-seconds-flat and then proceeds to treat Better, and their relationship, as though they’re the most toxic and awful things on planet earth. Bette deserves better than someone who hates her when they’re off and loves her when they’re on. Bette deserves better than someone who didn’t know who she was after more than a decade of being a couple; and then when she finally finds herself she blames Better for “taking up too much room.” That’s just bullshit.

I like the Micah and Maribel storyline, even if I have a hard time liking Maribel (lol I hate Sophie too). But they are making it way too hard on themselves and the writers are making it too complicated in terms of finding a donor. The hard part is tracking, TTC and actually getting pregnant. And I’d have more respect for this storyline if they moved on to those parts AND if they also addressed how much easier it’s going to be for Maribel and Micah because they collectively have so much money.

Where’s Nat? Did she and her kids get written out too? Why?

WTF was that weird storyline about Tasha? She couldn’t handle Alice becoming a famous podcaster? WTF? How does that even make sense? So, yes, she didn’t want to be outed on Alice’s radio show. So, yes, she didn’t really want to be out in public and was very afraid of all that. So, yes, their relationship wasn’t ideal, but.....when was Tasha ever a coward? And why didn’t we get any closure about Jamie?

I really enjoy the dynamic between Carrie and Finley; and those were the best parts of Episode 7 entirely. The rest didn’t ever make sense. The whole rest of it...just hogwash.

And there, that ends my rant. I loved this show. Seasons 1 and 2, I really loved it. But so far this season is just awful.

I hope I covered everything, lol.

#l word gen q #gen q s3 #showtime is an arse but i am still watching this train wreck #spoilers #spoilers for season 3 #the l word generation q

[actuallylukedanes]

Happy Chanukkah

Chanukkah started last night, and I lit our first candle. So, tonight is the second candle and lighting it was wonderful. I got 2 AMAZING gifts from Toni and a card -- and I am forever thankful for their family pride, love, joy, and willingness to embrace the things that make me, me. 

Pictures may be posted a later day.

Gifts aren’t the point of Chanukkah, at all, but it was so nice to be thought of and for this important holiday to me to be important to someone I love too.

Happy Chanukkah!!!!

#chanukkah #chanukkah 2022

[actuallylukedanes]

Christmas IS, in fact, Christian.

But that doesn’t mean things that happen around December, or things that embrace other holidays are. Just because it might look like a Christmas tradition to you, doesn’t inherently make it one.

Just wanted to add that.

There are so many other things to observe and even celebrate in December. And there’s so many lessons we could all learn. There’s a lot to be said for having a tradition and sticking to it. But, it’s also really important to note that:

If your neighbor is doing something which to you looks like a Christmas tradition, that doesn’t mean it is one. And it speaks to your own bias and up-bringing to label everything you see in December as a Christmas practice or tradition.

There are other religions. There are other cultures. There are other holidays and observances. And they need to be seen and made as (if not more) important too.

We celebrate Chanukkah and Yule in my home. My partner celebrates Christmas at their parents, who are a Christian household. I respect their decision to do so for their mother, and I join in by going up there and opening presents; but the lights strung in my home, my menorah on the mantle, the songs we sign and play, the baking and cooking I do, and the very tiny, tiny tree gracing my coffee table? These are not Christian traditions. They are not Christmas. Because I’m Jewish and my roommate/best friend is Pagan. And so, these things? They are Jewish and Pagan things, in my home.

Reminder that Christmas is a religious holiday and all the things that come with it (the tree, the colors, the traditions, etc.) are apart of it (even if you don’t celebrate for religious reasons it still is) and if you say “Oh it’s just part of the season” you’re throwing your Jewish & other not Christian religious participants under the bus

#christmas is christian #but that doesn't mean the holiday stuff is

[actuallylukedanes]

Sometimes I need the reminder.

#i always need this #parents #you didn't disappoint your parents #children grow and change

[actuallylukedanes]

i love how a lot of queer ppl have the same experience of toning down ur identities/labels for cishet people so tag this what you actually label yourself v.s what you tell cishet people

#yeah i've tried real hard to explain this to my sister and to my partner #and they do not get it at all #even though my partner is gay like she just don't get it #so and for the record #transgender non-binary but presents femme and resents it #additionally same-sex oriented but can be attracted to the spectrum of gender #but cis-penis repulsed #not sure how i feel about trans femme penis because i've never had that experience #would not rule it out as a rule but still i don't dig the dick at all at all at all #and so to everyone else i just say i'm gay #because my relationship looks gay (f/f) from the outside #and as a side note i am non-monogamous but in a monogamous relationship #so to the outside world I seem MONOG but I'm not BUT i follow the rules of the relationship I am in #and this one is really really monog and committed and i think cheating is wrong wrong AF #and so i seem monog to ppl #and i live with it #and i just say i'm gay and i leave out most of the rest #though i do tell ppl I'm trans NB

[actuallylukedanes]

I’m just so angry. So disappointed. She didn’t fight for any of the arrangements we had agreed upon and instead there’s some bizarre schedule where Liz gets him for all the actual holidays, all the days of the week, and we get him every third weekend of the month, 2 weeks of summer, half of winter break and half of spring break. It’s just awful and it’s nothing like what we agreed on together. Like, he’ll barely even be here...and when he is here, it’ll be so odd that it’ll disrupt our lives so, so much. What’s the point? And why didn’t she fight for what we had talked about? And why can’t he do summer programs here??? And why can’t we have him every other holiday? Like, what the hell? And why wasn’t my life or independence considered as important at all????? Like....what the fuck even happened in that meeting?

#life stuff #custody of the near step kid #so angry #so hurt