xelina

[xelina]

Dear, sweet, Littlefoot, do you remember the way to the Great Valley?  I guess so. But why do I have to know if you’re going to be with me? I’ll be with you. Even if you can’t see me. What do you mean I can’t see you? I can always see you.

The Land Before Time(1988) dir. Don Bluth

#started crying at “what’ll I do I miss her so much #and in a way you’ll never be apart #fuck #I am having a really hard time #this post is good #I really miss my best friend #love you Peter

[xelina]

My counsellor gave me this, because I told her that I was feeling really alone, and that (well-meaning) people keep trying to be positive and upbeat to me about the worst thing that has ever happened in my life. (Which just makes it feel more like they don't understand.) And this video helped explain what would be better, so it felt important to share in case anyone else needs to show it to someone or needs help being there for someone they care about. And also it made me cry again, so there's that.

#so I just wanted to put it here #grief #tw grief #tw death #dealing with grief #loss #but not the fun meme way #Peter #I miss you dude #as a side note #does anyone know if we're allowed to use GNU for other people? #He really liked discworld and I want to make sure his name stays around #but I very much don't want to disrespect Terry Pratchett if that's not allowed

[xelina]

More headshots!

Alen for @kingholly

Simraz for @.jnvamusic

Tuumira for @.ergotierney

Samson for @.ashketchup004

Cyrus for @xelina

[xelina]

So, here's the rest of the set that I posted about the other day. And because tumblr is tumblr someone was immediately shitty about me posting anything at all. So anon is off now. I'm really happy with how these came out, and I haven't been able to work on much new stuff since losing someone incredibly important to me. He's a huge part of why I've been excited about dragonborn characters enough to make these in the first place. These were the last project I got his opinion on. And I was supposed to be watching dungeon meshi with him and would've been really excited to share with him about the red dragon one working out so well with that. So if whoever sent that is still here, please just leave me alone. I deleted the message before blocking because I forgot we can do that to shitty anons now.

Behold! The Tiamat of crop tops! Dragons are really cool you guys Please consider checking out my shop

#personal #like are you fucking serious #I post so fucking rarely #and most of my posts have been about grief lately #and you're gonna come be shitty because you don't like the shirts I made? #leave me alone #I have been having such a hard time and now I get to feel shitty because a teen on the internet was mean to me #I am too old and tired and sad for this shit #and on the boop day no less

[xelina]

Please remember that every small step you take each day counts for something, and running several miles in one day won't help you reach your destination any faster. It will only make you too exhausted and aching to walk for the following days.

You're doing alright despite whatever you're going through. Living is enough.

[xelina]

Really enjoying the boop feature but also a little sad about it

Best friend and I sent each other just the word “boop” all the time and referred to messaging each other on discord before calling as “booping”

Really wish I could send him some of the booping memes today

#personal #Peter #it’s almost three months and I am having a hard day

[xelina]

Behold! The Tiamat of crop tops! Dragons are really cool you guys Please consider checking out my shop

#d&d #dnd #dungeons and dragons #cosplay #tiamat #dungeons & dragons #dragonscale #dragonborn #falin touden #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #dunmeshi spoilers #kobolds #my art #kobold #furry #scalie #scaly #dragon #red dragon #blue dragon #green dragon #black dragon #white dragon #Mathis #noctem clothing #noctem cosplay

[xelina]

[shows up at your door at 2AM] hey can we go through that last D&D session scene by scene and discuss the symbolism and the narrative themes and their implications, and how each character has grown and evolved? But in a normal way?

[xelina]

Hi! I think there was a poem that you wrote some time ago, I'd really like to read it again. It was about grief, and I believe there was a line to the effect of:

"The world is not less because you are not in it,

But the world is less without you"

I think there was also a line about the passing of seasons that mentioned plums ;; I hope I'm not crazy or mistaken. Love your work!

I think this is probably the one you're looking for!

--

When I say you were too young to go I mean the stars had not yet fallen. I mean there were rivers  that had not yet carved themselves canyons. I mean I can count the years you were here.  When I say you were too young  I mean there were still stories I never got to tell you. I mean there were joints in my body then that had not yet ached. I mean the orchid on my desk has been nothing but a green stick for weeks but just today it bloomed. You would care about that but you are not here to tell. When I say you were too young I mean I was. I mean I did not want to know that kind of quiet,  not yet, not sitting there in my fuzzy socks, reading  a string of texts and truths I did not want to believe in. I dreamed last week it was a lie. We went out to lunch. You were skinny and sun brown and sat sideways in your chair.  I got coffee and you had salad with figs, and then I woke up. When I say you were too young to go I mean I miss you. I mean you were a light on this earth. I mean starlight  comes across millions of light years of vacuum and silence. I mean when things get big you measure distance in terms of time spent. I mean the older I get the farther I get from you. -ejl.

[xelina]

So I initally made these because I've been increasingly into dragonborn characters and have had a hard time finding stuff related to them. But while I was wearing them a couple days ago had the idea that these red ones would also be perfect for Falin! So I'm probably going to see about making a feathery top to match, which was already on my list for aarakocra, but might get pushed up a litle bit. They're available here on my etsy if you want your own. Also in a few other colours (blue, green, white, and black), and when I'm able to work on designs again I'm aiming for that feathery top and some metallic colours. If there's anything else you guys want to see please let me know!

Reblogs are really appreciated, I haven't been in a good place lately and could really use the support!

#falin touden #dungeon meshi #dragonborn #dragon #dunmeshi #delicious in dungeon #dnd #dungeons and dragons #dungeons & dragons #d&d #falin #farcille #dunmeshi spoilers #dungeon meshi spoilers #my art #dragonscale #red dragon #noctem clothing #noctem cosplay #artofwhere #dragon scale

[xelina]

#:( #fuck I’d do anything for that #I miss you Peter

[xelina]

[xelina]

starting a collection

links to each post - please go show some love <3

[xelina]

I hope the universe would be kind once more

[xelina]

trying out a little animation in procreate dreams just to find out that gif export is not a thing yet lmao. Used a years-old Ace doodle from one of my sketchbooks for this. Good thing nothing bad ever happened to him huh!

[xelina]

ace on gouache more like gouace(??)

anyway happy birthday

[xelina]

I've received a few requests for a version with Astarion's little note included, so I've added a version with it to the shop! Available Here! Please consider checking it out or reblogging!

Want to get into Astarion's pants? Perhaps just steal his panties? I design cosplay themed clothes, and I'm really proud of these ones. I spent a bunch of time trying to get the design just right on the elven underwear from bg3! They're in my shop now! Currently three versions; Astarion, Halsin/Jaheira, and Twitch. they're available here!

And since it's one of the few times of year that my printer runs a sale, they're 10% off until December 30th!