vivacia-18

[vivacia-18]

I was talking with my dad recently & we got on the topic of People Thinking They Can't Do Things, and like, he is at his core a well-intentioned person who genuinely wants the best for others, but he has definitely internalized some harmful ideas a la "anyone can do anything, the only thing stopping them is their own attitude". so I was like. I see where you're coming from, but let me tell you a story.

last year, I worked with 10 year olds- many of whom had never really spent time outdoors- in an outdoor education program where they came to spend a whole week doing shit outside in nature. the top two scariest experiences for these kids were 1) very tall metal tower, and 2) walking outside at night in the dark with no flashlights.

I tried a lot of different things to persuade them all to join me for each experience: I presented it with enthusiasm and passion, I did physical demonstrations and scientific explanations to help them understands how safe it was, I voiced my absolute commitment to their safety, I invited them to brainstorm ways to help each other and themselves feel safe, etc.

generally I always had at least 2-3 kids out of about 10 who opted out, or if they did join me, would spend the entire experience crying and freaking out. when it was over, they would conclude that even though they did not die- or even get hurt- it was so scary that it wasn't worth it and they never wanted to do it again.

then I changed the question I asked. instead of asking them to tell me whether they could do it or couldn't do it, I asked them to raise their hand for one of three options:

You can definitely do this.

It will be hard or scary or uncomfortable, but you can try to do this.

It will definitely be too hard, scary, or uncomfortable, and you cannot or should not try to do this.

suddenly, almost nobody was opting out of these experiences.

they would try, even if they were scared, because they know that being scared didn't necessarily mean that they couldn't do it at all. and more importantly, they knew that if they needed to stop, that was an option; they weren't trapped in their decision to try.

and the real takeaway here, for me, is in the nuance: people need to be able to challenge themselves and to be uncomfortable in order to grow, and people need to be able to opt out in order for opting in to be a safe option.

[vivacia-18]

crochet snail 🧶

#art #snail

[vivacia-18]

moon snail 🌕

#art #snail

[vivacia-18]

Villain: We kidnapped your son!

Endeavor: Which one? I have three.

Villain: Uh, he said he enjoys being kidnapped more than spending time with you? -geez, what did you do?-

Endeavor: Which one? I have three.

Villain: ...uh, he's kinda emo and blunt?

Endeavor: Which one? I have three.

Villain: ...uh, he keeps talking about someone named 'Midoriya'?

Endeavor: Oh. That'll be Shoto then.

#bnha #mha #pfft

[vivacia-18]

(What we have in mind for now are black swords with low density silver glitter, silver enamel, so that the pride flag pops)

#poll #asexual #pin design

[vivacia-18]

I can't believe that ever since I started writing for me I actually enjoy my stories

Like, when I first started writing fanfiction I would hit post and never think of it again. I wouldn't even read the rare comments left. I found myself only twice re-reading something I had wrote and I remember hating it with such passion that I ended up deleting everything

And then I joined Tumblr and lots of people were talking about how one should write for themselves more than the readers, that while it feels good to have people like your works it won't mean anything if the writer themself doesn't like the story, and I actually started thinking about it, you know? It kinda opened my eyes

And now that I write for me more than I write for others I actually enjoy it. Yesterday I posted the new chapter of my latest story and I've read that chapter again and again smiling to myself like an idiot because I like it

It feels so weird and yet so freeing at the same time, I even write more than I used to now that I do with myself in mind instead of the audience

Yes to all of this!! You need to actually enjoy what you're doing otherwise it becomes a task, a chore, a burden and eventually you're not going to want to do it anymore. Finding joy in your writing is, as you said, so very very freeing

[vivacia-18]

Actual roman epitaph for a dog

[vivacia-18]

(for the purposes of this poll, there is no monkey's paw situation: the chore you pick stays the same level of difficulty/grossness/etc. as it normally is for you, and you only have to do it as often as you want to. the chores you don't pick are magically done for you exactly the way you'd want them to be, just with zero effort on your part.)

#poll

[vivacia-18]

Do not fall for the trap (moreso for salary workers), also known as fto (flexible time off)

[vivacia-18]

I LOVE THIS

[vivacia-18]

Fandom Problem #4834:

I hate when a fandom looks at parents in fiction and decides there are only TWO kinds of parents:

Abusive Parents OR Perfect Parents.

It's rarely as narrow as that. Some are abusive, some are flawed yet still good, some won't admit their flaws, and the list goes on and on. Similar complexities carry over to parent characters in fiction.

[vivacia-18]

#danny phantom #jazz fenton #art

[vivacia-18]

#‘’reincarnation’’ omfg X’D

[vivacia-18]

when people are like “the hunger games just stole the plot of battle royale” like listen everything steals from the plot of everything the lion king is just furry hamlet westworld is jurassic park but sexier lost is edgy gilligan’s island there are no original stories and the only good piece of media is jennifer’s body

[vivacia-18]

i painted my darling son

[vivacia-18]

Things I’m learning about All For the Game fans: a lot of y’all didn’t grow up with a cheese drawer in your fridge and it shows

#poll #in the ''predominantly for cheese but also deli meat and tortilla drawer'' crowd #XD

[vivacia-18]

a simple thank you is more than enough...

#danny phantom #art #<3