vampigeon
Vampigeon
A humble bird, bitten by a radioactive vampire...
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It's just dramatic tension that never resolves. You can just see the banks, with their ghoulish masks and distressingly easy-to-start chainsaws lurking in the background of every episode.
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It's just dramatic tension that never resolves. You can just see the banks, with their ghoulish masks and distressingly easy-to-start chainsaws lurking in the background of every episode.
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❤️
You may have seen a video on the internet recently. As have I!
A comic strip, Vampigeon by Josh Jennings.
Panel 1:
Caption: It’s not all bad, James Somerton fans. Now that you know his formula, you can make an infinite number of his videos using only the power of your imagination
Panel 2:
[A title card, with Stock Footage of cows with color filters and the text "Moo, Britannia by James Somerton."]
Panel 3:
[YouTube Other People's Words Reader James Somerton presents a video.]
James (Encyclopedia Text): Bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE), commonly known as mad cow disease, is an incurable and invariably fatal neurodegenerative disease of cattle. Symptoms include abnormal behavior, trouble walking, and weight loss.
Panel 4:
James (Standard Dialogue): Historians theorize that the first Mad Cow was, big surprise, straight and female. These symptoms, the abnormal behavior in particular, mimic what people with vaginas are like all the time.
Panel 5:
James (Standard Dialogue): I don't acknowledge nonbinary masc people or trans men, and, as such, their silence on the issue of Mad Cow…is deafening.
Panel 6:
James (Standard Dialogue): Once, I was walking down the street at night, when a pack of roving vaginas attacked me.
Panel 7:
James (Standard Dialogue): They brandished Mad Cow Burgers, screaming about I needed to kiss a boy in front of them.
Panel 8:
James (Standard Dialogue): I managed to get into my home, but I could still hear the scraping of their claws against the glass. Hear their sickening howls, bragging about how women don't have problems.
Panel 9:
[beat]
Panel 10:
James (Encyclopedia Text): Currently the only reliable test for Mad Cow is examination of tissues during a necropsy citation needed.
#james somerton#hbomberguy#yeah you can really see that $8000 dollar camera pulling its weight#dude always looks like he's about to declare a meeting of the Midnight Society officially begun#you know#in addition to the million other ways he sucks
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You may have seen a video on the internet recently. As have I!
A comic strip, Vampigeon by Josh Jennings.
Panel 1:
Caption: It’s not all bad, James Somerton fans. Now that you know his formula, you can make an infinite number of his videos using only the power of your imagination
Panel 2:
[A title card, with Stock Footage of cows with color filters and the text "Moo, Britannia by James Somerton."]
Panel 3:
[YouTube Other People's Words Reader James Somerton presents a video.]
James (Encyclopedia Text): Bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE), commonly known as mad cow disease, is an incurable and invariably fatal neurodegenerative disease of cattle. Symptoms include abnormal behavior, trouble walking, and weight loss.
Panel 4:
James (Standard Dialogue): Historians theorize that the first Mad Cow was, big surprise, straight and female. These symptoms, the abnormal behavior in particular, mimic what people with vaginas are like all the time.
Panel 5:
James (Standard Dialogue): I don't acknowledge nonbinary masc people or trans men, and, as such, their silence on the issue of Mad Cow…is deafening.
Panel 6:
James (Standard Dialogue): Once, I was walking down the street at night, when a pack of roving vaginas attacked me.
Panel 7:
James (Standard Dialogue): They brandished Mad Cow Burgers, screaming about I needed to kiss a boy in front of them.
Panel 8:
James (Standard Dialogue): I managed to get into my home, but I could still hear the scraping of their claws against the glass. Hear their sickening howls, bragging about how women don't have problems.
Panel 9:
[beat]
Panel 10:
James (Encyclopedia Text): Currently the only reliable test for Mad Cow is examination of tissues during a necropsy citation needed.
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My main deviation from the memetic interpretation of recent Tumblr events is feeling like it's more of a dumbass thing than necessarily malevolent. Not that that changes the outcome!
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You know those inspirational "look at this wisdom my kid said" posts? This is indistinguishable from that.
Vampigeon, by Josh Jennings.
[A comic strip. Panel 1: a toddler, BEAR lays on a pouf on the floor, staring up at the ceiling.]
BEAR: Hmm…
[Panel 2: Angle on JOSH, the toddler's dad, who works on a tablet while talking to the kid.]
Josh: Awfully quiet over there. You pondering dep, existential truths?
[Panel 3: The Bear continues to stare at the ceiling.]
[Panel 4: Close up on the toddler.]
BEAR: (softly) pooping.
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My comic is now on Webtoons! If you're into that. Many people sure do seem to be.
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Coming in just under the wire is the silly little visual novel I made for the Desert Bus for Hope 2023 Game Jam. It's...a reality dating show? But with various things that can pair with espresso? It's a silly little thing, and you might enjoy it.
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You may have seen a video on the internet recently. As have I!
A comic strip, Vampigeon by Josh Jennings.
Panel 1:
Caption: It’s not all bad, James Somerton fans. Now that you know his formula, you can make an infinite number of his videos using only the power of your imagination
Panel 2:
[A title card, with Stock Footage of cows with color filters and the text "Moo, Britannia by James Somerton."]
Panel 3:
[YouTube Other People's Words Reader James Somerton presents a video.]
James (Encyclopedia Text): Bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE), commonly known as mad cow disease, is an incurable and invariably fatal neurodegenerative disease of cattle. Symptoms include abnormal behavior, trouble walking, and weight loss.
Panel 4:
James (Standard Dialogue): Historians theorize that the first Mad Cow was, big surprise, straight and female. These symptoms, the abnormal behavior in particular, mimic what people with vaginas are like all the time.
Panel 5:
James (Standard Dialogue): I don't acknowledge nonbinary masc people or trans men, and, as such, their silence on the issue of Mad Cow…is deafening.
Panel 6:
James (Standard Dialogue): Once, I was walking down the street at night, when a pack of roving vaginas attacked me.
Panel 7:
James (Standard Dialogue): They brandished Mad Cow Burgers, screaming about I needed to kiss a boy in front of them.
Panel 8:
James (Standard Dialogue): I managed to get into my home, but I could still hear the scraping of their claws against the glass. Hear their sickening howls, bragging about how women don't have problems.
Panel 9:
[beat]
Panel 10:
James (Encyclopedia Text): Currently the only reliable test for Mad Cow is examination of tissues during a necropsy citation needed.
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Happy "The Office 'Holiday' Party is During Hannukah" to those who celebrate.
A webcomic. Vampigeon by Josh Jennings. Panel 1: [a man in a suit talks to his assistant] Suit: …And we'll call it a "Holiday Party!" That way nobody gets on our ass about only acknowledging Christmas! God, I love being inclusive! Makes my balls hard! Assistant: Don't you mean…you know what, nevermind. Panel 2: [Angle on the Assistant, who holds a calendar] Assistant: Sir, do you think we should look at a calendar for even ten seconds? Make sure our Christmas party isn't the same time as one of those other holidays? I have one right here. Panel 3: [Closeup on the Suit Man, who studies the calendar] Suit: Let me see that… Panel 4: [The Suited Man bites down on the calendar] Sound Effect: Chomp! Panel 5: [The Suited Man tears the calendar in two with his teeth] Sound Effect: Rip! Panel 6: [The Suited Man makes eye contact while chewing the piece of calendar] Sound Effect: Chew. Chew. Panel 7: [The Suited Man swallows the calendar] Sound Effect: Gulp! Panel 8: [Two-shot of the Suited Man and the Assistant] Suit: Nope. We're good.
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Little doodle of The Bear, who has become *fascinated* by their belly button lately.
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I'm not saying that this is the sport of the future…
No, really, I'm not. It's a terrible idea. Never do this.
A comic strip. Vampigeon by Josh Jennings. Panel 1: A man in a suit and turtleneck talks to others. Behind him, a baseball statium is visible out a window. MAN: Gentlemen, welcome to the opening game of…Basepoline! My incredible new sport that combines baseball with trampolines.
Panel 2: Closeup of the man. MAN: I know what you're thinking…"The Safety Concerns!" Let me assure you: this game has been meticulously designed, and there is not a single risk unaccounted for.
Panel 3: View of the baseball field. An outfielder waits to catch something. ANNOUNCER: Pop fly out ot left field. Looks like he's ready for it…
Panel 4: A trampoline flies in, hitting the outfielder. OUTFIELDER: OORF!
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Man, that zucchini's been doing a lot of crunches. In which case, they must not have been cooked yet. That's a vegetable joke. I dunno, man, I'm real tired.
#webcomic#vampigeon#comic strips#webcomics#sex work#sex positive#happy pride 🌈#pride month#farmers market#cottage food#zucchini#sexy zucchini#if you found this strip by browsing the sexy zucchini tag you have to tell me
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Did the "Do a strip in two hours from two prompts" challenge from Strip Search again. Today's prompts were "folding chair" and "rotisserie." Admittedly, the folding chair did not feature prominently in the end product, but they're there!
This is less of a Marvel-specific thing and more just…look, don't do marketing and PR work for a company unless they're paying you.
A comic strip.
Vampigeon by Josh Jennings
Panel 1: A man with Mickey Mouse ears, Mr. Marvel, looms above another man, who is currently tied to a folding chair and turned sideways.
MR. MARVEL: Comfy?
CHAIR MAN: Nah. But it's fine. A True Fan never complains!
Panel 2: The view rotates to be upright. The man and chair are tied to the spinny part of a rotisserie. Mr. Marvel walks toward his own folding chair.
MR. MARVEL: Exactly! You devote the one, precious life you have to enriching me, and I give you a tenuous connection to your lost youth.
CHAIR MAN: Pretty good deal!
Panel 3: Mr. Marvel leans in.
MR. MARVEL: Hey. Remember Spider-Man?
CHAIR MAN: Sure do!
Panel 4: Mr. Marvel lights a match and holds it in front of his face with an intense expression.
MR. MARVEL: People didn't make the things you love. We did. The Brand. Your Favorite Brand.
Panel 5: Mr. Marvel leans in again. The first under the Chair Man has started. He begins to sweat.
MR. MARVEL: Remember Paste-Pot Pete?
CHAIR MAN: Less so…
Panel 6: Angle on the Chair Man. The fire roars underneath him. He sweats, his hair and clothes beginning to catch fire.
CHAIR MAN: Um…Mr. Marvel? Not to be ungrateful, but my body is being seared? By the fire?…
Panel 7: Angle on Mr. Marvel, who turns the rotisserie spit.
MR. MARVEL: You know who else's body was covered with fire?…
Panel 8: Zoom in closer on Mr. Marvel's face.
MR. MARVEL: A little fella…by the name of…
Panel 9: Zoom in on Mr. Marvel's smiling mouth.
MR. MARVEL: The Human Torch.
Panel 10: Back on Chair Man. His face wears an expression of glee as his hair is nearly burnt off and his skin begins to melt.
CHAIR MAN: Yeeeeee!!!
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My husband and I were watching Strip Search, and we decided it'd be fun to do the Elimination Challenge, where you draw a strip from two random concepts in under two hours.
This one was "llama commuting."
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My husband is watching the finale, so I decided to draw "What if Kendall Roy was a New Mexico Oilfield Dad on a lake trip?" His boat doesn't have a working motor right now, but he got it for a great deal. He heard about Bitcoin in November of 2022 and he's very excited to tell you about it.
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Keep reading
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