titanic-officers

[titanic-officers]

Lightoller: "Bride and Phillips sitting under a tree."

Bride: "Shut up or get away, Charles."

Lightoller: "First comes love, than comes marriage."

Phillips: *big stone in hand* "And a dead second officer."

#titanic #titanic officers #charles lightoller #harold bride #jack phillips #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

The officers and the captain while lost in the woods

Wilde: "Well, we wouldn't be in this mess if CHARLES DIDN'T CRASH THE CAR!"

Lightoller: "I'M SORRY, that turkey came out of no where!"

Boxhall: "Somebody pass me the map and compass."

Pitman: "Wait, where's Harold?"

Lowe: *has already found his way out of the woods*

Captain Smith: "Don't worry, gentlemen. We have plenty of food in the back of the car."

Murdoch: "No we don't, because James ate it all."

Moody: *stuffing his face with a sandwich, mumbling to himself while pacing* "I'm stuck here in the middle of nowhere eating a ham sandwich!"

#titanic #titanic officers #henry wilde #charles lightoller #joseph boxhall #herbert pitman #harold lowe #captain smith #william murdoch #james moody #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Bride: *opening presents on Christmas morning* "I hope it's a puppy!"

Ismay: "You say that every year, Mr Bride. You know you can't have a dog in the wireless room."

Ismay, to Phillips: "So what did you get him, Mr Phillips?"

Bride: *gasps*

Phillips: "A puppy."

#titanic #titanic officers #harold bride #bruce ismay #jack phillips #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Rowe: "I need advice."

Hichens: "Kill them."

Rowe: "You shouldn't be promoting murder."

Hichens: "We all have our flaws."

#titanic #titanic officers #george rowe #robert hichens #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Lowe: "You're pretty dumb, James."

Moody: "Thank you."

Lowe: "Wait, why are you thanking me? I just insulted you."

Moody: "All I heard was 'you're pretty'. I'm focusing on the positives of life."

#titanic #titanic officers #harold lowe #james moody #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Fleet: "Reginald, I know that you hate Halloween, but stick with me and I promise you, you will love it."

Lee: "Can you magically make everyone kind, sober and fully dressed?"

Phillips: "Hm... 'kind, sober and fully dressed'. Good news, everyone. We found the name of Reginald's sex tape!"

Bride: *spews out his water*

#titanic #titanic officers #frederick fleet #reginald lee #jack phillips #harold bride #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Moody: "Taco cat backwards is still taco cat."

Lowe: "I don't know what to do with this information."

Lightoller: "Dog food lid backwards is dildo of god."

Murdoch: "I don't know what to do with that information either..."

#titanic #titanic officers #james moody #harold lowe #charles lightoller #william murdoch #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Fleet: *screeching, running over the boat deck*

Hichens: *is chasing him*

Lee, to Rowe: "I'll bet you ten pounds Frederick insulted Robert's steering abilities."

Rowe: "Twenty."

#titanic #titanic officers #frederick fleet #robert hichens #reginald lee #george rowe #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Pitman: "Henry, Lightoller isn't talking to me."

Wilde: "Enjoy it while it lasts."

#titanic #titanic officers #herbert pitman #henry wilde #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

George Rowe gardening at his house

Rowe: "Robert, grab that little hoe."

Hichens: *grabs Reginald Lee*

#titanic #titanic officers #george rowe #robert hichens #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Wilde: "You know what, I think I'll take the job. Titanic is a wonderful ship and the other officers seem like nice chaps."

Murdoch: *having a mental breakdown*

Lightoller: *pranking everyone*

Pitman: *makes confused noises*

Boxhall: *slams face into the wall*

Lowe: *aggressively pressing buttons*

Moody: *running around screaming*

Wilde: ......

Wilde: "This is fine."

#titanic #titanic officers #henry wilde #william murdoch #charles lightoller #herbert pitman #joseph boxhall #harold lowe #james moody #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Bride, to Phillips: "I love laying my head on your chest when you're sleeping, so I can hear you breathe."

Hichens, to Rowe: "I recorded you snoring, so you can hear how fucking loud you are and why I can't fucking sleep!"

#titanic #titanic officers #harold bride #jack phillips #robert hichens #george rowe #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Lightoller, very drunk:*points to Sylvia* "That's my girlfriend, suckers!"

Murdoch: "Your wife, Charles."

Lightoller: "My WIFE! EVEN BETTER!"

#titanic #titanic officers #charles lightoller #william murdoch #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Captain Smith: "If you were given a box containing everything you ever lost from your childhood, what would be in it?"

Boxhall: "Ah, my happiness. Can't remember the last time I saw this."

Moody: "My dignity! Wow, it's been forever."

Lowe: "Oh, my will to live. I didn't really miss this, but whatever."

Pitman: "I was thinking a pen or something, but are you guys alright??"

#titanic #titanic officers #captain smith #joseph boxhall #james moody #harold lowe #herbert pitman #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

so I read a book the other day, "the watch that ends the night" by allan wolf, that just made me really love the Titanic officers (or, the fictional versions of them, that is). and like. this. this is exactly the content I want of them.

you may have seen me taking over your notes section for a couple hours as I dove through your entire collection of incorrect quotes, but I'd just like to say, I quite enjoyed reading your posts, thank you for sharing them <3

That's wonderful, thank you so much! I'm really glad to hear that you enjoy my posts, and also content about the Titanic officers in general. There're not many people out there who know about them, so I'm always happy to find another person who loves the officers just as much as I do <3

[titanic-officers]

Watching a scary movie

Lightoller and Moody: *curled in a blanket burrito with just their eyes visible*

Lowe and Boxhall: *shoveling popcorn into their mouths with eyes glued to the screen*

Wilde and Pitman: *trying desperately to keep cool, but are halfway into Lightoller's and Moody's lap*

Murdoch: *flails wildly when scary things happen and accidentally kicks everyone at least twice*

#titanic #titanic officers #charles lightoller #james moody #harold lowe #joseph boxhall #henry wilde #herbert pitman #william murdoch #incorrect quotes #funny

[titanic-officers]

Bride: "Ugh, I'm so tired.... I couldn't sleep last night...."

Rowe: "You know, if you can't sleep then that means someone was thinking about you."

Bride: "Who on earth would be thinking about me at 3am?"

Phillips: *gay panicking at 3am*

#titanic #titanic officers #harold bride #george rowe #jack phillips #incorrect quotes #funny