thegirlwhofellfromthestars

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

irl shit is probably going to kill my activity on this blog but at the moment i'm currently rotating all of the potential high-strung brotp Emotions that could result in interactions between renegade!hal and kara

#renegade hal jordan #kara zor-el #hal & kara #lucia.txt

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

alright. here's a masterpost of most of my stupid horny dms i have sent to friends about renegade hal jordan under the cut. some of these get pretty... detailed. you have been warned

#not safe for wombats #renegade hal jordan #...i'm so sorry. #lucia.txt #if you are curious as to why i alternate describing him as having a dick and having a pussy #it's because he's got a case of schrodinger's gender to me. i hope that helps #one of these days i might end up sending something that reads like the eggman rant from the sonic real time fandub #if you're curious one of my friends DID say something like 'yeah. he looks like a slut' so. i feel validated :)))

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

hal: so she's a robot that sings?

kara: nope, she's a voice synthesizer.

hal: a. a what now?

kara: she's a voice synthesizer! it's this program called vocaloid that you can use technology so you can make these pre-recorded voices sing what you want. there's a bunch, but miku's just the most popular one.

hal: so... she's not real? she's... what? huh?

...on a much lighter note, i've been thinking about kara talking to hal about vocaloids. he sees her miku keychain and asks about it and then she explains exactly what vocaloid is in intricate detail. i'm pretty sure hal wouldn't quiiite get it being in his 40s but he's taking her seriously and listening for real which is important

#special thanks to my buddy archimedes for tolerating my yelling about this in dms #lucia.txt

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

happy purim, y'all :) i wrote brotp fluff to celebrate! please read on ao3 here (it's restricted to ao3 users only, so if you have an account make sure you're logged in!)

#lucia is typing... #hal & kara #hal jordan #kara zor-el

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

(repeating through gritted teeth) i am cringe but i am free. i am cringe but i am free

#lucia does an art #green lantern #oc x canon #kyle rayner #yuki kimura #(that's the girl's name) #the joke here is she's 4'9" and a (jenna marbles voice) 32 year old ladyyyy #i can't believe i finally got around to posting art here and my first piece is an oc x canon shitpost

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

...i. if i get enough /incriminating evidence/ i MIGHT make a masterpost of all my very, VERY crude horny dms that i've sent about renegade hal

#lucia.txt #the purpose: shits and giggles

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

sinhal thoughts you say 👀also another renegade hal lover, someone with taste

i would LIKE to write sinhal because they are the source of so much brainrot, however i need to marinate it. i'm still too new to green lantern and too self-conscious about my characterization abilities to do so just yet.

and yes! renegade hal is a really cool iteration of the character who i like a lot :) (side-eyes the unimaginably horny messages my poor friends had to put up while i was screaming about him)

#answered

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

the day i unleash all of my sinhal brainrot upon the world at once will basically mean its over for all of you

#lucia.txt #i have Ideas. #i have Thoughts. #i just need to spend 12342343 years marinating them in my brain #and also constantly flipping through comics and glancing back at my word doc muttering #'would he fucking say that'

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

update: i crossposted it to ao3 here

still can't stop thinking about kara accidentally referring to hal as "dad", even in a more low-key context and how something that could usually be played for comedy is nothing sort of devastating.

maybe kara's having a bad day - the sort where her chest is tight with frustration, every little minor convenience makes her fingers twitch, the sort where the schoolwork and reminders of the ordinary life she has alongside her life as supergirl is smothering her, all the missed phone calls from the friends who only know her as linda danvers. she's snapped at people throughout the day, blurting out a tired little, "i'm sorry" when they frown or look at her in shock. every little reminder of when her ill temper leaks through the cracks is like a stab to the side. i should be doing better, she thinks to herself, everyone says it's okay, that i'm still only a kid. but i don't want to be just a kid. i turn sixteen in september.

she runs into hal and waits for him to say or do something - anything - that will make that horrid little knot of agitations that's formed in her chest tighten further. but he sees the sting of bitterness to her dark blue eyes, the way she's trying so hard to twitch her lips into a solemn but neutral expression. hal must know and keeps himself at arm's distance; they've both had their fair share of bad days aplenty. he only walks away after giving her a slight nod through the green of the mask he wears, leaving her be.

hal comes back a few minutes later with a small cardboard box of juice and hands it to her. apple juice - her favorite, no pineapple or fruit punch on the label to be found. just plain apple juice. she tears the straw off the back and pushes it through, taking a a sip. the rush of sugar is a balm, even if only a small one. the barest hint of a proper smile stirs upon her visage for the first time in a while today. after a few engrossed sips:

"thanks, dad."

her smile vanishes.

they both stare at each other with the depth of something fathomless - horror, maybe, or some sort of flooding, viscous mess of all sorts of feelings. she remembers for a moment the way her father back on krypton would wordlessly give her comfort on bad days - drape a blanket over her shoulders as she stared out at the openness of dark red sky before departing, ensure she had a small snack even as she sulked alone in her room. and hal...

well, kara remembers he only told her a little bit about his father. but that is enough for her to know.

she takes a deep breath, the smile on her face not quite so genuine this time - moreso some sort of crumpled, uncomfortable mimicry of the real expression. "sorry about that. it just sort of slipped out."

"it's fine. sometimes things like this happen."

"still..." the words coat her mouth, fuzzy under the apple juice she'd been drinking. "thank you for doing that. i've been having kind of a crappy day today, and it helped."

the sting from earlier still persists, hal's face settles into a fixed, solemn look. "no problem," he says. "i'm glad i could help, even just a little."

#lucia.txt

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

shout out to the friend of mine who had to deal with my absolutely unhinged horny rants renegade hal jordan in our dms.

#if you know you know #lucia.txt #not safe for wombats #...yeah i'm using that tag #for that sort of subject matter

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

still can't stop thinking about kara accidentally referring to hal as "dad", even in a more low-key context and how something that could usually be played for comedy is nothing sort of devastating.

maybe kara's having a bad day - the sort where her chest is tight with frustration, every little minor convenience makes her fingers twitch, the sort where the schoolwork and reminders of the ordinary life she has alongside her life as supergirl is smothering her, all the missed phone calls from the friends who only know her as linda danvers. she's snapped at people throughout the day, blurting out a tired little, "i'm sorry" when they frown or look at her in shock. every little reminder of when her ill temper leaks through the cracks is like a stab to the side. i should be doing better, she thinks to herself, everyone says it's okay, that i'm still only a kid. but i don't want to be just a kid. i turn sixteen in september.

she runs into hal and waits for him to say or do something - anything - that will make that horrid little knot of agitations that's formed in her chest tighten further. but he sees the sting of bitterness to her dark blue eyes, the way she's trying so hard to twitch her lips into a solemn but neutral expression. hal must know and keeps himself at arm's distance; they've both had their fair share of bad days aplenty. he only walks away after giving her a slight nod through the green of the mask he wears, leaving her be.

hal comes back a few minutes later with a small cardboard box of juice and hands it to her. apple juice - her favorite, no pineapple or fruit punch on the label to be found. just plain apple juice. she tears the straw off the back and pushes it through, taking a a sip. the rush of sugar is a balm, even if only a small one. the barest hint of a proper smile stirs upon her visage for the first time in a while today. after a few engrossed sips:

"thanks, dad."

her smile vanishes.

they both stare at each other with the depth of something fathomless - horror, maybe, or some sort of flooding, viscous mess of all sorts of feelings. she remembers for a moment the way her father back on krypton would wordlessly give her comfort on bad days - drape a blanket over her shoulders as she stared out at the openness of dark red sky before departing, ensure she had a small snack even as she sulked alone in her room. and hal...

well, kara remembers he only told her a little bit about his father. but that is enough for her to know.

she takes a deep breath, the smile on her face not quite so genuine this time - moreso some sort of crumpled, uncomfortable mimicry of the real expression. "sorry about that. it just sort of slipped out."

"it's fine. sometimes things like this happen."

"still..." the words coat her mouth, fuzzy under the apple juice she'd been drinking. "thank you for doing that. i've been having kind of a crappy day today, and it helped."

the sting from earlier still persists, hal's face settles into a fixed, solemn look. "no problem," he says. "i'm glad i could help, even just a little."

#lucia is typing... #i guess. this isn't typed up all tidly on microsoft like usual lol #dcu #hal jordan #kara zor-el #hal & kara

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

today i am thinking about how sasakure.uk's "*hello, planet." hits a liiittle too close to home with how it could connect to kara's grief at being one of the last of her kind

#lucia.txt #kara zor-el #dcu #...having a normal one out here #(LIES. when am i EVER being normal thinking about kara)

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

...on a much lighter note, i've been thinking about kara talking to hal about vocaloids. he sees her miku keychain and asks about it and then she explains exactly what vocaloid is in intricate detail. i'm pretty sure hal wouldn't quiiite get it being in his 40s but he's taking her seriously and listening for real which is important

#kara being a miku stan is the hill i WILL die on #kara zor-el #hal jordan #hal & kara #kara: well the first JAPANESE vocaloids were kaito and meiko from crypton future media #hal who's still not quite sure what vocaloid is: (nodding sagely)

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

some thoughts about aspcts of hal and kara's relationship with regards to their relationships with their parents specifically and how that'd effect their interactions

disclaimer: this is largely me unintelligbly rambling and based off personal interpretation and stuff i remember, as well as me incorporating some headcanon in how i portray kara's family in particular (though i'll definitely alert people when we go into headcanon territory). also tw for discussions/mentions of child abuse.

...i feel like it's safe to say that hal has a really, really strained relationship with his family. we see during the parallax run his perceptions of his family versus the reality - a sort of thing about neglect and abuse and cracking under the weight of expectations while also feeling unimaginably trapped in your own childhood trauma. and a big part of his character arc is trying to grow and heal from it, but sometimes things just fall the fuck apart. while that has been retconned (and imo that's... an issue in and of itself), it's definitely the version i tend to go with because i feel like it means a lot and contributes a lot of understanding to the context of hal jordan, the character.

kara's relationship with her family is a bit weirder in that it's very much inconsistent across continuities. her original, pre-crisis parents were clearly very good, loving parents to the point they allowed their daughter to remain with her foster family because they didn't want to pressure her into choosing. later continuities tend to portray her family as outright abusive, while others tend to have her mother be the more strict one and her dad be the more overtly loving, laid-back one.

as for where my personal headcanon falls: i tend to have it be in the middle. while i think her parents' relationship with her isn't exactly perfect - in particular, that there's some stuff they're just going to struggle with for a long time, possibly forever, when it comes to kara's being autistic and how that might clash with kryptonian culture - and they'll make fuck-ups, it's not really a pattern of abusive behavior and they are truly well-meaning and care about her. i think between the two of them allura is probably the one who struggled on some level with really understanding some of the neurodivergent traits kara had and trying to resolve them rather than understand them, but not from a place of malice, and it wasn't extreme enough to the point that they couldn't try to talk it out.

"lucia," you're probably saying, "where the fuck does the brotp ever's interactions come into play?!"

WELL.

i think that sort of contributes to hal's simultaneous caution and understanding of kara's grief. while i think he's only really started to grapple with his own projections and downplaying of his own childhood trauma, kara's relationship with her parents had comparably less baggage than his but also the sheer weight and drasticness of what's happened is so awful. her parents, no matter how imperfect they were, are dead, and she loved them, and the fact that they're dead fucking sucks. in some ways, hal sort of feels like he's similar to kara's parents in the whole "trying to unlearn the stuff from your own upbringing and background that you took for granted".

so much of parallax's motivations are tied up in personal grief and that his concerns and fears and anger and upset were dismissed when honestly his desire to do something about it came from an understandable place. hal's already working on repairing his fuck-ups, and he sees this kid and thinks, "i really, really don't want her to go through the same things i did when i felt like her. maybe there are things she was taught about herself as a person that are wrong. i don't know, i wasn't there, but this is a kid who needs a place where she knows that it's okay to not be okay."

i think hal really knows how to communicate with kara better than he thinks he does - he probably second-guesses himself about it, with trying so hard to better himself as a person after what he did and wondering if it all means that much. but i think having an adult in the situation who'd try to reach out to her quietly - especially one whose experiences aren't wholly different than hers - leaves a tremendous positive impact on her.

this is all to say i need to draw or write a scene where she's sort of cranky and hal quietly grabs her a juice box of apple juice and she accidentally says, "thanks, dad" in response but it is played for all the gut-wrenching "OH G-D, WHY" factors it has.

#lucia.txt #i WOULD have drawn something for them or doodled something #but my hand is cramped up and sore after spending the entirety of yesterday drawing arknights fanart #you're all fucking welcome. have me yelling into the void #hal jordan #kara zor-el #hal & kara

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

to the multiple people who have been quietly liking the snippets from my hal & kara wip: hi, hello, how are you :) you now have explicit permission to enter my inbox and cry with me about them, i desperately need more people to yell with about the brotp ever

#lucia.txt

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

kara gets a hug (REAL) (NOT CLICKBAIT)

#lucia is typing... #dcu #kara zor-el #hal jordan #hal & kara

[thegirlwhofellfromthestars]

...i feel like this blog is very quickly going to end up becoming the "that one user who cries about brotp/platonic hal & kara like a broken record" all the time

#lucia.txt