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#you never know when it’ll be the last time
nu-suave · 9 hours
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WHAT IT'S LIKE DATING SATORU
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word count: 992
a/n: hi. i wanted to write satoru being emotionally vulnerable so-!
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The thing with Satoru is that, despite popular belief, he doesn’t know how to be casual. If you’re in a relationship with him, he’s not going to be casual about it - once you get to know him, it’s not hard to tell that he’s cripplingly lonely. Letting someone into his life? Consider yourself lucky. Seriously. Dating him comes with a lot of vulnerability on his part. The last person he’d let this close was Getou, and it took months of flirting with him before he opened up about the man. He doesn’t have anyone to talk to about his desires, his insecurities, he has no one to be truly vulnerable with before you; it takes a long time to start dating because of it, but when you finally get there the gates flood open.
If you thought he was affectionate before you started dating, you’re in for a surprise. Any reservations he had previously (of which you didn’t even know he had) very quickly evaporate. It doesn’t take long for his favourite thing at the end of the day to become draping himself over you, head on your shoulder and arms wrapped loosely around your torso as he discusses his day. If it’s not that then he’s reclining on the couch, head cradled on your thighs as he looks up at you as you’re on your phone, watching in content silence. He’s seemingly always got a hand on you, and you consider it just a quirk of his until he quietly confides with you one day, voice thick with sleep, that he’s terrified he’ll find you not real; that you, the fragile tenderness he shares with you, the happiness and content Satoru associates with you, will not be there - either by a fiction of his imagination or something crueler, death or abandonment or any number of awful things.
Satoru loves physical intimacy - not necessarily sexual in nature, just the constant reminder that you’re there with him. He finds himself unwilling to let go of you, like it’ll shatter that intimate bubble he nurtures every time you’re together, private or otherwise. 
“Satoru, I can’t move,” you say, more a meaningless complaint than an actual accusation. He’s accosted you in the kitchen when you’re in the middle of making dinner, swooping  in after his day at work to demand your attention. As per usual, his head is nestled in your hair, one hand spread at the curve of your waist as the other sits innocuously on your shoulder. You turn towards him - forcing him to loosen his grip even as his hands slide to settle on your hips - to press a kiss at the corner of his mouth. “If you’re going to crowd the kitchen, you might as well help me cook. Grab a pot for me?”
“I’m only here to do chores for you,” he whines, lips pulling up into his characteristic smile. He’s lost the blindfold, and the bright, piercing blue of his eyes light up his pretty features, giving him a more boyish look than his typical fashion. “Be honest, do you even like me, or am I only here to be bossed around?”
“Of course I love you,” you say plainly. “Don’t play dumb. Aren’t you supposed to be the strongest? Surely you can boil some water.”
“You misuse my skills,” he replies, pressing a kiss to your temple before moving to do as asked. He never actually puts up a fight when you ask him to do things; you could even say a part of him thrills at the notion of you bossing him around the kitchen, indulging in the mundanity that Gojou Satoru, the Strongest, is very rarely allowed to experience.
Whenever you reciprocate his affections - reach out first, lean into his side, ply him with sweet words and even sweeter actions - his heart feels it could burst out of his chest. Whenever you initiate anything, whether it be tugging him closer before you fall asleep or suggesting ideas of where to go out to eat, a part of him is newly thrilled and flustered each time. He’s not used to this tenderness, this reciprocity. He treats it in his heart like something delicate that he’s terrified of losing, and ecstatic to experience over and over.
He tries to keep things relatively light-hearted, tone constantly dipping into teasing or playful and veering away from solemnity. It’s his way of preserving this bit of peace he has, shuttering his heart away from the almost inevitable breakdown of your relationship. It takes you a while to pick up on it, but once you do, you’re quick to call him out on it.
“Don’t do that,” you scold, and for once you sound genuinely annoyed. “You think I can’t tell when you’re trying to play it off? You need to tell me when these things upset you, Satoru. I’m not a mind reader.”
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs, the apology sweet on his tongue, “I’m not used to having good things stay in my life. Can you blame me for trying to preserve it?”
You huff, letting him pull you closer through your linked hands. His fingers lace through yours properly, flexing and unflexing against your own. “The best way to preserve our relationship is to be honest with me, Satoru. I’m not going to be upset with you for being bothered by things.”
Even then, he’s painfully concerned that he’s misreading things. He tries not to make it obvious, but he can’t help it sometimes. Satoru reaches out to pull you closer, he’ll text you something dumb just to see your reply, and he’ll call you at the end of the day just to hear your voice. Sometimes, he needs something more than that; voice thick with exhaustion, fingers tangled into your hair, he’ll whisper the words into your skin; I’m not misreading things, am I? You really love me?
Of course, you reply every time, how could I not?
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hysteria-things · 15 hours
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NATE'S TREEHOUSE
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: nate’s official treehouse tour!
just a silly little post🤭
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𝐈 — NATE’S TREEHOUSE
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the outside of his treehouse! almost two decades old, yet it’s still hanging in there.
𝐈𝐈 — THE PROJECTOR
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you guys practically lived out here on summer nights. watching a ton of movies off an old projector until the early morning. (even if you guys got yelled at to go to bed)
𝐈𝐈𝐈 — ENTRYWAY
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right when you walk in there’s a jenga table that later you guys *cough* matt *cough* grew to hate. on the bright side, nate still has your arts and crafts hung up!
𝐈𝐕 — NATE’S ROCK COLLECTION
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as time went on, you collected rocks to give them to nate. meet stone, pebble, rocky, and dwayne “the rock” johnson.
𝐕 — PICTURES
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two photos from the collage wall that hold the most memories in nate’s heart. pictured left to right: chris, nick, matt, nate, and sls.
𝐕𝐈 — INTERIOR
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nothing changed about this. same layout, same furniture… everything. who knew you’d lose your virginity on that couch?
𝐕𝐈𝐈 — MEMORIES
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the old TV setup that’s still standing and proud. you guys celebrated his tenth birthday up here, hence the birthday cards! he also always kept a brush on sight for you — he knew how picky you were about your hair getting tangled and messy. last but not least, the board games on the ground. nate gets hit with a bit of sadness whenever he sees them because you guys didn’t know it’ll be the last time playing those games all those years ago…
𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈 — LOCKBOX
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personally nate’s favorite addition. the lockbox where your and nate’s polaroids go. it’s strictly for his eyes only.
𝐈𝐗 — THE BUNNIES
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pretty self-explanatory! nate’s bunnies: bb and snowy :)
𝐗 — GOLDFISH
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nathaniel the goldfish that you guys won at the fair a year ago. he didn’t want it, but you insisted he’d keep it. you came up with the name to be funny, but he didn’t find it funny at the time. however, he kept the name because he can never say no to you…
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0asisbliss · 3 days
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Yandere HXH headcannons
A/N: No specific order. Phantom troupe and other characters are separated though.👍🏾💞 Tysm for 300 followers guys!!!🤍
Characters included: Chrollo, Shalnark, Uvogin, Feitan, Nobunaga, Pakunoda, Phinks, (Phantom Troupe) Kurapika.
Warnings: Dark themes, choking, kidnap, mentions of murder, torture, gore, Feitan being his own warning, Non-con. NOT PROOFREAD
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Phantom troupe:
Chrollo:
-`♡´- You’re special you’ve caught the mysterious man Chrollo Lucifer’s attention.
-`♡´- Keeps you a nice little room with no windows. Plenty of light though. Cute little lamps, posters of band you like or a anime. Fluffy blankets. You know you won’t be uncomfortable with him at all.
-`♡´- Yes the room might be all fine a dandy, but where you are located is a whole different subject.
-`♡´- As we all know Chrollo just doesn’t stay in one spot, but you will. He places you in a comfortable little cottage in the middle of nowhere. Even if you were to find a way to escape it’ll be hard find civilization.
-`♡´- He makes sure to check up on you every week, and if not evey week, every month. Chrollo knows that he’s not able to stay with you for long periods of time, so he make sure that your stocked up on every type of food you want. Water and supplies that will last you a while. In that case that’ll you’ll rarely run out of anything.
-`♡´- When Chrollo is there with you. He’s clingy. Not so much in a physical way more of a “Where are you going now?” Or “Why are you always getting up and leaving me. (Name)?”
-`♡´- Yes he gives you your freedom, but don’t get to happy. He has eyes everywhere. You can go outside, but he almost is always watching you.
-`♡´- He’s one of the people on this list that constantly has you under surveillance.
-`♡´- If you do decide to have the balls and leave. Once he finds you he will strip you of everything he gave you. Your no longer staying in the nice cottage he placed you in, you get any food that he gives you like it or not, and you going with him everywhere 24/7. No brakes. If you decide to be hostile that’s when Chrollo has to inforxe punishments.
-`♡´- Punishments can include spankings, restriction of food, No baths, etc. Anything that could make you dislike him for a while, and show you not to do it again.
-`♡´- Chrollo could never want to physically hurt you. He’d only do it if you decided to escape, and you run.
-`♡´- The only thing he’d do is break your legs. In order for you not run for a while.
-`♡´- Will not force himself on you unless you want it. He doesn’t want to scar you for life he just wants you to love him.
Danger level 4/10. Probably one of the most chill and nice ones on this list.
Shalnark:
-`♡´- I’m sorry for you really. He’s a meanie. Dressing you up in clothes he thinks looks cute on you. Mocking you when you say you don’t want to do something. When you beg, and cry for him to stop doing something he just continues.
-`♡´- He also treats you like his personal doll. Something that he can play with.
-`♡´- Shalnark most likely has you placed somewhere he visits often, or at his own home. He also has you chained up unlike Chrollo who lets you roam freely.
-`♡´- He is another one that is on the go very often, but he’ll stay with you if he has the opportunity.
-`♡´- He also the clingy type. He leans more on the physically side than any one else on this list. Randomly hugging you from behind, kissing your neck when you two are on the couch, threatening to stick a pin in you if you decide to fight his affection.
-`♡´- He one of the people on this list that like when you do domestic duties. He even buys you cute little aprons, and other supplies to help out.
-`♡´- He tells you ahead of time when he’ll be arriving home so you can greet him like the good little darling you are.
-`♡´-Will drug you if you become to hostile or try to fight him. He sees it as a win win situation. You’re calm but also vulnerable to him.
-`♡´- He’s a pervert :(. He gets in the shower with you . He’ll randomly take his clothes off and jump in with you offering to wash your back and clean your face. He expects you to do the same with him, and if you don’t suggest or ask he’ll get pissed off and take it out on you.
-`♡´- He’s also one of the ones on the list that will force themselves onto you. He’ll do it while you unconscious though. At least you’re not struggling as much. 
-`♡´- When he’s doing while you re conscious he’ll mock you. He’s thinks your tears are so adorable.
-`♡´- He will kidnap you he won’t try to give you freedoms. Although he will give you access to social media. You can play games and even have a phone.
-`♡´- Don’t try to contact the police or any friends. He’ll know and you can’t do that anyway. He’s already ten steps ahead of you with that. He either locked all access to that or he disabled it.
-`♡´- Danger level 7/10. Will stick a pin in you if you piss him off enough.
Uvogin:
-`♡´- Awe man. He’s not as bad as you might think. He’s at heart a real sweet heart. Though he has audacity to act like your in a perfectly normal relationship he has his moments where he snaps back into reality.
-`♡´- You most likely go everywhere with him.
-`♡´- Uvogin is very clingy for his size. It doesn’t matter what size you might be. He is larger than you.
-`♡´- He takes you everywhere he goes. He another one on this list that thinks you feel the same way about him. Honestly it looks pretty sad when he realizes from time to time that you actually hate him.
-`♡´- If I could give you any advice it would to never try to escape. He another one on this list that will lash out, and hurt you physically. He does not care how much it hurts he will choose to punish you if you upset him enough.
-`♡´- Even though Uvogin has his moments he knows what boundaries are. He gets it. If you’re not in the mood right now he’ll back off.
-`♡´- For punishments he won’t just lash out on you randomly. He’ll only punish and harm you if you give him a reason.
-`♡´- He actually loves you. He wants you to be happy not just comfortable. He’ll try to ask you if want something or if there something particular that you might be looking at.
-`♡´- He gives you freedom to wonder around the town you two are currently staying, or even travel somewhere.
-`♡´- Like Shalnark you can have a device or devices of such. He won’t lock or block any number on your phone. He won’t even go through it.
-`♡´- Uvogin’s mere appearance is enough to tell someone to fuck off. And if that doesn’t work he’ll just simply kill them. It’s your fault anyway you couldn’t keep your mouth closed.
-`♡´-Honestly if you just don’t do anything to piss him off you’ll be fine.
-`♡´- Danger level 6/10. Not really dangerous unless you provoke his anger.
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Feitan:
-`♡´- He’s the worst person to be stuck with on this list. Most people headcannon Feitan to be a Sadist but I think he both a Sadist and Masochist.
-`♡´- He just plain awful. He finds ways to toy with you when he’s bored. He’ll take down to his torture chamber, and take a finger nail or two off, and maybe a couple of teeth out.
-`♡´- When he’s not doing that he’s violently fucking whenever he feels like it.
-`♡´- Feitan loves you. He’s going to do things you don’t like. Feitan hasn’t felt this kind of love for anyone so he’s going to think of you as a threat. Something that is getting his head. You cloud his thought 24/7. It irritates him.
-`♡´- “C’mon pretty want to see your face.”
-`♡´- Worse part about this is that he has that shit eat grin on his face the whole time.
-`♡´- Sometimes. Just sometimes he’ll unchain you and let you roam around the house.
-`♡´- He keeps you in his room chained to his bed. Only when he get bored and takes you to the basement or when annually lets you walk around the house after dinner is when you get let your legs breathe.
-`♡´- All in all Feitan is a danger to society, and you.
-`♡´- My advice to you is to escape, and don’t get caught. If you do he won’t kill you, but you will have zero limbs. Sorry. :(
-`♡´- Danger level 8/10 he’s not that bad, but just be careful what you say. And follow every single one of his orders.
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Nobunaga:
-`♡´- Nobunaga is delusional. Wants you around his 24/7 will never let you go. Want some space? Wheat is that again?
-`♡´- Will pout like an immature child if you don’t give him what he wants. He one of the people in this who will expect you to have sex with them sorry.
-`♡´- Will show you in physical affection how much better loves you.
-`♡´- He also one of the few you can manipulate very easily. Nobunaga is blind with his love for you. Simple kisses or hugs that you give him willingly instead of the one-sided affection that is usually there will leave him feeling like you actually love and care for him.
-`♡´- Will force himself on you. Actually cares if you cry. He’ll stop or if he doesn’t stop he’ll go slower. He also wants you to enjoy yourself. He can be a little selfish when it comes to pleasure, but if you ask him nicely to give you more attention he’ll be more than happy to give it to you.
-`♡´- Very nagging. If don’t give him your attention 24/7 he’s gonna be pretty pissed. He’ll drag you to the nearest bedroom, and show you how much attention he wants.
-`♡´- He will never physically hurt you. Punishment can include taking away baths or Tv privileges. (I know 😭)
-`♡´- If he does end physically harming you it’ll be spankings. Not as hard as Chrollo might be.
-`♡´- Danger level 5/10. He’s very good at finding you if you ever try to escape. So don’t.
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Pakunoda:
-`♡´- She constantly gets you gifts etc.
-`♡´- She keeps you in a nice ass penthouse that she lives in. You can roam around you can even go outside, but she sometimes prefers you just go out with her. At least she goes out pretty often.
-`♡´- She likes it more when she’s making you happy rather than uncomfortable.
-`♡´- She’s also another one that’s overly clingy
-`♡´- She’s sweet, but she’s the type to kill on of your friends to show you she means business when it comes to your behavior. Don’t worry she’ll make it up to you by getting you your favorite animal. :)
-`♡´-Can’t outsmart her, and don’t even try to think of plans to escape. She’ll find out every single plan and tell you to not even think about it.
-`♡´- Won’t physically hurt you, and can’t bring herself to do that ever.
-`♡´- Doesn’t like it when you hostile or when you get angry. She’ll do her best to calm you down.
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Phinks:
-`♡´- He’s sweet, but he’ll still beat your ass if you fuck up enough.
-`♡´- He’s sorta like Uvogin when it comes to patience. He has a very short patience span.
-`♡´- He wants you to be happy of course, but he also wants you to obey him. You have to always be self aware of your body language and attitude around him. He notices everything literally.
-`♡´- He clingy but in a suffocating way. You get up to get water and he is constantly asking where you’re going. You’re better off stating it before you get up.
-`♡´- Piss him off even the slightest and it’s back to the basement for you.
-`♡´- He likes it when you approach him first about things. If you want something just ask, and you’ll most likely get it. That all depends on you behavior though.
-`♡´- You’ll be fine. Just make sure you stay out of his stuff. He probably won’t tell you he’s a troupe member unless you find out.
-`♡´- Danger level 6/10 just because he’ll break your legs if you piss him off enough. Not the worse on the list though.
Probably one of the most delusional ones on this list.
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Kurapika:
-`♡´- Probably one of the most delusional ones on this list.
-`♡´- Because of his lack of social skills he probably won’t be aware of you liking him.
-`♡´- He probably the only one on this list that wasn’t stalking you beforehand and actually knows you in ways you didn’t know he did.
-`♡´- He won’t exactly kill his rivals. The only time he’d go out his way to kill them if they threaten or harm you.
-`♡´- Will most likely not have you in any harm. Unlike other people on this list.
-`♡´- Wants to have children in the future with you if you would like it.
-`♡´- Won’t force you into anything, and won’t make you be anything you wouldn’t want to be.
-`♡´- He likes the way you say his name so he’ll get you to say it multiple times a day.
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ladykailitha · 24 hours
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Never Hold Back Your Step... Part 6
Yay! Another Boy with a Bat! In this we have Steve and the rest of the seniors finding out if they graduate and Steve getting squicked at his own pool.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
****
Things began to improve between Steve and Nancy but Eddie was still keeping an eye on her. His hackles were up now, and he had no intentions of dropping them any time soon.
Steve was glad that swim season was up and that the basketball team had done so badly their losses far outweighed their wins. And while he was upset he wasn’t starting spring training with the baseball team, it was nice to spend his afternoons with Eddie.
He could see that Eddie was really struggling with his homework, but whenever Steve asked, his boyfriend would blow him off. He was fine. They would graduate together. Just Steve wait and see.
During that last free period of the day, Steve began work on his next comic. He kept it short like he did the other one. Just the part about the junkyard and the dogs. Maybe the next comic would deal with the tunnels, but not this one.
Steve sketched out the RV, changing it from the bus it actually was. He actually enjoying find out ways to hide the details of his experiences into the comic.
What was even better was that he was pretty sure it would even take the smartest members of the Party a couple of pages to figure it out. He had taken out his pen to start inking the page when he felt someone knock into his elbow just as he was about to put his pen to the paper.
He looked up to see a couple of members of the junior varsity team, walking past, snickering.
It had been awhile since he had been a target of someone’s bullying and wondered where the hell it had com from. The idiots were wearing their letterman jackets allowing Steve to read their names. Carver, McKinney, and a couple of others.
Steve shook his head. Billy was a bad influence on the team, and maybe now the coach would see that. Considering how badly they lost this season with the asshole as team captain.
He looked back up at the retreating backs of the juniors as they laughed and whispered insults about Steve as they made their way out of the library.
He knew all too well how they treat people like them, verses outsiders. And now that Steve had thrown his lot in willingly with the outsiders, the other members of the team were going to be trouble.
Billy could call them off, but Eddie’s status as drug dealer wouldn’t faze that lot. They were the church boys. The sanctimonious assholes who would be straight edgers if they liked the violence, but were too soft to get their hands actually dirty.
He looked down at his drawing and sighed. These assholes didn’t know what pain actually looked liked. Still in their ivory towers, looking down on the masses and turning up their noses.
Steve flicked back to an earlier page of the hero and his little brother walking down the railway tracks and ran his fingers over the two figures. He hadn’t colored it yet, but he knew the trucker hat would be red. For the bond the boys shared.
The bell rang and Steve gathered up his stuff. He shouldered his backpack. Just then there was a tap on his shoulder.
It was the librarian, Mrs. Locke.
“Next time, you’ll be meeting with Mr. Cole and handful of other students to know if you have the credits to graduate,” she said, handing him a paper with the information he would need.
“It’ll be here at the library,” she continued. “But be sure to get here in plenty of time because the tables will fill up fast.”
Steve nodded. “Thank you, Mrs. Locke. I’ll try to get here as soon as I can.”
She nodded and let him go. Steve hefted his backpack again and made for the parking lot, a sense of dread pooling in his stomach.
****
Steve sat at the same table as Eddie, Janice and Marty. They all greeted him with quiet murmuring. The whole room vibrated with nervous tension. Mr. Cole was going to tell them their future and fuck if that wasn’t the most terrifying thing in their young lives.
Steve envied them.
For Eddie though, this was his second go round and that fear of failure radiating off the older teen in waves.
Mr. Cole walked into the library and whispered something to the librarian. She nodded curtly and walked back to her desk.
He sat on an empty table and pulled out three stacks of folders. A large stack of about twenty or so, a much smaller stack of about five, and a stack of two.
Eddie gulped and Steve took his hand under the table.
“Thank you all for being here,” Mr. Cole began. He hovered his hand over the first stack. “These are all of you who are graduating without a shadow of a doubt. You have the credits as of now to graduate. Congrats.” His hand moved over to the next pile. “This is those that as long as they pass their classes by May 15th, will graduate. But it is dependent on you passing those classes.” His hand landed on the final two folders.
“These two aren’t passing,” he continued grimly. “Do not pass go, do not collect your diploma. For those two, you have three options. Repeat your senior year. Take your GED that will at least be equal to a high school diploma. Or you flunk out of high school. Walk away from formal education for good.”
Steve stared at the second pile with a growing pit of dread pooling in his stomach.
“I will call each of you by name,” Mr. Cole said, “and will talk to you away from your peers. I’m not here to name and shame and if you really want to know you can wait until graduation.”
There was a little bit of grumbling, but mostly from the assholes no one liked anyway.
“Steve Harrington.”
Steve gave Eddie’s hand a squeeze and got up. He followed Mr. Cole to what the students called the Stacks. They weren’t really stacks of books, but it was a set of tables for study that were surrounded by bookshelves to make it secluded. Guys liked to take their girlfriends back here for a little alone time.
“Hey, Steve,” Mr. Cole greeted. “I was happy to see your grade climb back up after your concussion made them take a nose dive.”
Steve nodded, keeping his fingers crossed behind his back. “I tried as hard as I could.”
“Well it really paid off,” Mr. Cole said. “Because you have more than enough credits to graduate.”
Steve stared at him in shock as his guidance counselor handed him his file. He flipped through it and sure enough, he already had all the credits he needed. In fact, he could have graduated early if it wasn’t for Mrs. Hall.
“Thanks to you,” he breathed.
“They aren’t the best grades,” Mr. Cole admonished. “But they are good enough to get you across that stage.”
Steve nodded and handed the file back to him. He walked back to his table.
One by one all the kids were called and while there were happy kids and wailing tears, it was hard to tell the graduating from those that weren’t.
After everyone had been called and told that they could go home, the four of them sat at the table, waiting for everyone else to file out.
“Valedictorian!” Janice crowed. “I made it, baby!”
“I’m graduating too,” Marty said. “Barely. I just have to make sure I don’t fail Mrs. McDonald’s final and I’m good to go.”
“Eddie?” Steve asked instead of giving his own news. Because his didn’t matter. Not when his boyfriend, the best and brightest person Steve had ever met, (and yes that did include Nancy Wheeler) was curled up on himself, staring at the table.
“No, man,” Marty said, “not again...”
Eddie just nodded. “I was doing the work. I was turning it in. I thought the grades I was getting back were enough, but they weren’t.”
Steve wrapped his arms around him and just let Eddie’s tears soak into the collar of his shirt.
His poor beautiful Eddie. He wished he had done more to make sure he graduated.
But now it was too late.
****
Steve threw Eddie a pool party to make him feel better about not graduating again. Something that Steve really shouldn’t have done if he wanted to avoid the question.
“Come on, Stevie!” Eddie called from the side of the pool. “The water is fine. Stop being the babysitter for two seconds and enjoy your pool, babe.”
The kids still didn’t know they were a couple, but they had gotten used to the endearments that Eddie threw out on a regular basis. They all got nicknames and endearments. Max was Red, Dustin was Dusty, Lucas was Strider and so on. So they didn’t even bat an eyelash at his use of ‘babe’ to describe Steve.
Mike rolled his eyes and scoffed. “Steve never gets in the pool. If he wasn’t on the swim team, I would have had assumed that he can’t.”
Eddie got out of the pool and Steve’s eyes trailed down his torso, following each drop of water as they ran for his waistband. Eddie smirked as he got really close. Steve closed his eyes to block out the dirty thoughts that went off in his head like church bells, loud and deep.
Vaguely behind him he could hear Nancy hissing at Mike, but he couldn’t hear what she said over the rushing in his ears of the blood traveling southward the closer Eddie got. He gulped heavily. Eddie cupped Steve’s cheek tenderly and Steve leaned into the touch. He didn’t care who noticed their casual affection. He was starting to shake like a leaf and not just from the way his boyfriend looked like sex on legs, either.
Quietly as though it was a secret between them Eddie said, “Is this about the comic?”
Steve’s lips quivered as he nodded, his eyes still closed. “They all know except...” he waved vaguely at the Corroded Coffin boys.
“Do you want me to kill Mike?” Eddie asked with a grin.
Steve fought to tamp down on his answering smile, but it broke through anyway. “I think one death is enough.”
He paused with a frown and looked behind Eddie where apparently everyone had gathered. In that brief moment, their silence had made Steve’s answer as loud as if it had been had been a shout.
“Shit, man,” Mike mumbled. “I’m sorry. I forgot.”
Steve’s shoulders slumped. “It’s not a big deal. I still swim. Just not here. And I act as lifeguard for everyone. It’s fine. Honest.”
Nancy chewed on her lip, wrapping her arms tightly around her waist.
Jeff winced. “Yeah, I think we all forgot that Barb vanished from here. Not that we forgot about her,” he added waving his hands at Nancy’s dark glare. “It’s just so easy to forget it impacted more people then you’d think.”
Nancy nodded and let herself be comforted by Jonathan.
Steve pushed Mike into the pool causing a large splash and suddenly the tension was gone. The laughter and fun returned. He breathed a sigh of relief and Eddie wrapped his arm around Steve’s waist.
He leaned in close, “You gonna be okay, babe?”
Steve smiled. “Yeah, I guess it’s good they know,” he said, indicating the Corroded Coffin boys. “So I don’t get freaked out and hurt someone.”
“You’d never,” Eddie soothed.
Steve smiled warmly at Eddie and Jonathan and Nancy shared a knowing smile. He bumped Eddie’s shoulder with his own.
“Where did you learn to swim?” Steve asked turning back to sit sit on his lounge chair.
Eddie grinned. “Wayne taught me the first time we went camping up at Lover’s Lake.”
He sat down in the V of Steve’s legs and lifted one so that it was on his lap.
“How old were you?” Steve asked, basking in the attention Eddie was giving him despite the two of them not being out to Steve’s ducklings.
Eddie hummed for a moment as he thought. “I guess I was about seven or eight. My dad was in jail for the first time and my mom needed the weekend to recoup after an especially long week at work. So Wayne offered to take me camping for the weekend. Back when was he was young, wild and free.”
Steve bumped him with his knee. “Which he doesn’t regret exchanging for you a second.”
Eddie blushed. “No, but with me it meant taking a responsibility he never planned. He could have found someone, settled down, had a family of his own. I could have had nieces or nephews if I hadn’t been dumped on his doorstep.”
Steve sat up and turned Eddie’s chin toward him. “And you would have been lost in the system and hurt far worse then if he hadn’t taken you in.”
Eddie smiled. “You just want Uncle Wayne all to yourself.”
Steve laughed. “You caught me!” He began to tickle Eddie’s sides, causing the other boy to jump and squeal.
“Fiend!” Eddie cried as he scrambled off the lounger to get away. He leapt to his feet and then grabbed the lounger and flipped it.
Steve let out a squawk of surprise and landed on the cement with a thud and a laugh.
Dustin swam over to Gareth, figuring him to be the least scary of Eddie’s friends and whispered. “Are they always like this?”
Gareth scoffed. “No.”
Dustin sighed. “Oh thank go–”
“Sometimes they’re worse,” Gareth bit out, before wading back into deeper waters.
Dustin looked over at the pair of them, cocking his head thoughtfully to the side. There was something more to their friendship, but he couldn’t quite place what it was. Then Max splashed him and suddenly the thought was gone.
****
As for why it doesn't bother Nancy? That's because it's not her pool. She can go home while the sun is still out. While Steve has to hear the lapping of the water day in and day out. Has to see it in the dead of night, like the night Barb disappeared.
Tag List:
@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @emly03
@spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie
@chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @danili666
@goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
@justforthedead89 @vecnuthy @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690
@anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
@cinnamon-mushroomabomination @dragonmama76 @scheodingers-muppet @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt
@useless-nb-bisexual @angels-of-hades @mugloversonly @y4r3luv @greeniebean911
@birbsauce @acingthecounts @cryptid-system @counting-dollars-counting-stars @kultiras
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lunajay33 · 1 day
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Change Part.6
•🎀🩰🩷•
Summary: Y/n is a loner but loves ballet but her family doesn’t have enough money for her to dance at the studio, Daryl is a redneck who hates people and prefers bikes, until one day these two run into eachother and their lives change drastically, will Daryl toughen her up? Will y/n soften Daryl? Or both? How will things go when people start coming back from the dead
Pairing: Young Daryl Dixon x f!reader
A/n: This is going to be a series, it’s gonna start with how they met eachother and their lives before the apocalypse, eventually it’ll blend with twd story line!!
Part.5
•Masterlist•
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It had been a week since the incident with the walker, Daryl refused to let me go out alone again and I didn’t blame him I didn’t want to be alone either it was too risky, it wasn’t just my life in danger, I had a baby to worry about and I refused to leave Daryl alone in a world like this, I rolled over in bed admiring his sleeping form, his hair all crazy, I love him so much and the fact that our family was just about to begin tore something from me that I always dreamed about
“Mornin” he grumbled as I ran my hand through his hair
“Sorry did I wake you?”
“Nah I was up a while ago just waiting for ya”
“Mmmm” I didn’t know if it was the pregnancy hormones or what but my mood was at an all time low and I didn’t wanna drag Daryl down too
“What’re ya thinking about” he asked as he squeezed my hip
“Nothing”
“Angel I know ya like the back of my hand, I know when yer over thinking”
I sighed hating that he’s always been able to crack me out of my shell he shown me time and time again that I can trust him with anything, he’ll we’re having a baby together why shouldn’t I tell him
“Just been thinking where my family are now, I know I haven’t talked to them in like a year but I still wonder if they’re even alive”
“The last time you talked to them they called ya a selfish slut, ya shouldn’t worry about them, all they’ve ever done was hurt ya angel, we got our own family now, one that’ll love ya more than they ever could” Daryl wasn’t much of a big speech kinda guy but when he knew I needed comforting he pushed that side of him away to be there for me
“Yeah I guess you’re right, like usual” I said laughing as he pulled me closer so I could lay my head in his chest
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I was sat in the living room curled in a blanket reading the new twilight book hearing the rain patter against the windows, the smell of a roast in the oven that Daryl had put in, right when I got to the part where Edward was leaving Bella the phone rang, Daryl at my side handed it over scoffing at the caller ID
Caller ID: Jackson L/N
“This can’t be good” I sighed clicking answer and putting it on speaker
“Hello?”
“You need to come home” not even a hi or nothing
“Why? None of you have bothered to contact me in months what is it this time?”
“Dad lost his job, mom and dad need money for rent” I could see the anger written all over Daryl’s face
“Jackson I have my own life now, I can’t be helping you guys out ever time you need money, I have bills of my own and I don’t wanna waste my money on people who don’t even care about me”
“Are you serious right now?” He asked enraged
“Why can’t you help, you’re the one that got that football scholarship, I had to work my way through university and I’m still paying off student loans, plus Daryl and I have to pay for our house and car and motorcycle”
“You know what this is done, you’re out of this family for good this time, mom and dad should’ve gotten rid of you when they had the chance you selfish slut” the phone disconnected signalling he hung up
I looked at feeling my chest tighten, I never wanted this I was never the golden child in their eyes, I only ever felt like I mattered when Daryl came into my life
“He’s lucky this was over the phone or I’d beat him into the ground” Daryl groaned rubbing my legs over the blanket
“Why am I never good enough for them?”
“Ya got that wrong Angel, they ain’t good enough for you”
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As I sat outside eating breakfast Daryl and Merle got ready for the day, Merle was going to Atlanta with some people from the camp and Daryl was going out hoping to find a deer he’s been tracking for a while
“I gotta go now Angel” Daryl said as he stung his crossbow over his shoulder
“But I don’t want you to go” I whined getting up to wrap my arms around him
“I know but I’ll be back later this evening just try and stay around the other, don’t want another problem like last week” he said placing a kiss to my cheek
“Fine just promise me you’ll be safe out there, that you’ll come back to me”
“Promise”
He picked up some extra arrows and disappeared through the tree line
“Ya got him wrapped around yer lil finger don’t ya” Merle mocked
“Come on Merle can’t you just be happy that he’s happy, I know you don’t like me much but you’re my family now and I’m yours, plus I’m carrying your niece or nephew can’t we just be cordial for once” I said exhausted from his constant bickering
“Don’t matter ta me ya got knocked up, ya made my brother soft and yer gonna see ya ruined his life” he picked up his weapons and left the camp site leaving with the Atlanta crew
“God when do I catch I break?” I sat back down in the camp chair not noticing someone sit next to me until they talked
“You okay sweetie?” It was Lori
“It’s just Merle, always a pain in my ass, just been thinking about what’s gonna happen now with the baby and everything I’m just scared” I looked at here to see if she’d give me advice but here eyes were wide
“What?” I asked confused
“You’re pregnant?”
“Yeah, I guess we never really mentioned it”
“You know when I found out I was pregnant with Carl, I was a wreck I was young and scared and didn’t know what to do with myself, but the moment I saw him curled up in my arms so little without a care in the world, I knew what I had to do to protect him from harm, everything will be okay” she smiled patting my back
“Thanks, that’s help a bit I just wish it wasn’t in these circumstances”
“How far along are you?”
“About 4 months now, I’ve been taking my prenatals and everything”
“Well I’m always here if you have questions about the baby or changes you go through, but I have to go cut Carls hair”
Something clicked, maybe since this was a new start for Daryl and I and with the baby in this new world maybe I needed a new look, something to liven my spirits
“Umm Lori, would you be up for cutting my hair too!” I asked as I ran up next to her as she walked towards her camp
“I’d love to”
I sat next to Shane as Lori worked on Carls hair, he couldn’t stop complaining but it was adorable
“One day you’re gone wish you had her cutting your hair” Shane said laughing
“Doubt it”
“Trust me Carl, one day you’ll crave to be have these moments again with your mom, it may not seem like it but you will” I said seeing a little smile on his rosy cheeks
“Alright you’re all done” Lori said as she swiped off his extra hair on his shirt
I sat down in front of her as she wrapped a towel around my shoulders
“Alright how short do you want it?” My hair was down to my mid lower back
“How about just below my shoulder”
“That’s quit a chop”
“Well I need it”
She held my hair back and it a split second it was chopped, she straightened out some uneven pieces and it was done
“Well what do you think?”
“It’s really nice Mrs. Dixon!” Carl said with a beaming smile
“Well thank you but you can call me y/n sweetie” he was adorable I hope my child is as sweet as him
“It suits you perfect dear”
“Thank you! I should go clean some clothes done at the quarry, if you need anything I’ll be down there!”
I spent most of the evening down at the quarry cleaning and scribbling mine and daryls dirty clothes, laying them out on some rocks to let them dry, meanwhile dipping my feet in the cool water helping to sooth my ankles that have been getting a bit swollen
I looked around hoping no one was near, I haven’t been able to get a good proper bath in a while so I stripped down my clothes leaving only my bra and panties, submerging myself in the lake floating belly up watching the clouds pass by just like the time Daryl took me here
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“Daryl Dixon did you drag me out here just to see me naked?” I asked smirking as he started taking off his shoes and pants
“Come on it’s nice out yer gonna love it” he said as he was stepping into the lake
I bit my lip feeling that thrill shoot through me, I stripped to just my panties and bra, I walked over taking his hand
“Aren’t you going to take your shirt off?”
“Ya sure?” I knew he was embarrassed about his scars but they weren’t his fault
“You know they don’t bother me, I love you for you, not what happen to you” I said squeezing his hand reassuringly
He lifted it over his head and threw it back over to my clothes pill
“Come on Dixon show me how great this’ll be, better not let me drown” I laughed as I dragged him in
“Still can’t believe yer my girl”
“And I’ll be your girl until you’re sick of me”
“Never”
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“Well well well what do we have here?” I heard behind me as I pulled on my clothes after drying off
“What do you want Ed?” I groaned feeling that touch of fear he instilled in the women of the camp
“Showing yourself down here for the whole camp, you’re asking for it” he said stepping closer
“Leave me alone Ed”
“Ya ain’t got your man around who’s gonna stop me?”
“Don’t you touch me or you’ll be sorry”
He stepped closer squeezing my jaw now face to face
“Like I said ain’t no one gonna stop me” he said as his other hand started to wander down my arm
Before he could get any further he was ripped away Shane throwing him to the ground
“Touch her or anyone else again Ed and I’ll beat ya to death I swear, come on y/n” I gathered up all the clothes I washed and ran to Shane’s side as he lead me safely back to the camp
“Thanks, I didn’t know anyone was around”
“Ain’t your fault, Ed’s one sick man you stay away from him, stay with the group until Daryl or Merle gets back”
I sat down next to Amy folding up the laundry still to shaken up to have conversation that’s when a car alarm was ringing around the quarry, the group was back and it felt a little better knowing Merle would be here while Daryl was gone, Shane shut off the car alarm and others filtered out of a cargo truck
Lori and Carl had their moment with their “back from the dead” father and husband which was incredibly heart warming but then I realized something
“Where’s Merle?”
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Please please please give me some ideas for this story going forward🩷 How should I incorporate the ballerina story line into the new world??:)
Taglist: @pinchofthetwd @bigbaldheadname @strawberrykiwisdogog @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @l0kilaufeys0n7 @deansapplepie @severelykinky @tesfayera @daryldixmedown @secretsicanthideanymore @mordilwen-of-mirkwood @secretsicanthideanymore @superbowlisgay @pollito-chicken @minnie-min @writer-ann-artist @twisteduniverse5 @heidiland05 @lettersfromyourlove
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godslino · 4 hours
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IN BLOOM | jisung first date series. second chance lovers.
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pairing: jisung x fem!reader word count: 13.2k genre: childhood friends au, angst, fluff, songwriter!jisung, florist!reader warnings: swearing, minor character death, grief/loss (nothing to do with any of the members!) summary: it's february. the tulips are in bloom. jisung is back.
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chan | minho | changbin | hyunjin | jisung | felix | seungmin | jeongin · · · ♡ series masterlist · · · ♡ taglist · · · ♡
a/n: *taps mic* hello?? is this thing on?? oh good. yes. hi. hello! it's been a while, as most of you can tell. thank you all SO MUCH for sticking around. if you've been reading my asks you'll know that march and april were rough months for me personally. shout out to my anons and mutuals who kept my spirits high and made my days brighter. uhhh, this was originally supposed to be a stand alone fic but i figured hey, what the hell, and made it into jisung's first date chapter. it's pretty heavy stuff. lots of feelings, lots of love. i hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as i did writing it! again, thank you so much for waiting for me. i'll be back soon with more updates! all the love <3
also thank you kenzie for being such a light during all of this. i hope all my screaming in your message was worth it!
“All of these had to be pulled.” Hyunjin huffs, dropping a few crates just past the doorway. 
“Again?” you ask, hands on your hips as you stare at yet another wasted supply. “I don’t understand, they sold so well last year.”
Hyunjin gives you a sad smile. “It’ll pick up eventually, don’t worry. I mean the holidays just finished and business usually slows down in the months after anyways.”
He’s being sincere, you know that. But there’s a part of you that also knows it’s a lot more than just the usual ebb and flow of sales. He’s being nice for your sake.
“Maybe we could try coming up with other ideas?” he suggests, because Hyunjin is nothing if not kind. Always willing, always finding a way.
He moves past you to grab a fresh pair of gloves. The ones he’s wearing are dirty, pollen-stained and ripped at the edges. 
“You’ve always been really good at basket arrangements. We could try to make some for Valentine's Day. Different sizes, maybe? The big ones will probably do well for online orders since they’re more optimal for things like office deliveries and stuff like that.”
You hum in approval. “True. I mean, I was kind of worried we would have to skip out on deliveries this year since we don’t have the manpower to handle all of that, but I think Jeongin’s been looking to pick up hours around here again. He said something about his program giving them a month of independent study, so he’ll be home for a bit.” you say, scribbling down a reminder in your notebook. “I could ask him to help with driving the truck in his free time?”
Hyunjin lights up– he always does when Jeongin is mentioned. 
It’s been a lot quieter ever since he left for college. There were so many tears and so many hugs that were met with countless 'you guys are dramatic's in return. But it’s hard to not feel sad when people leave town; when they decide the borders lined with apple trees and rice fields aren’t enough to stop their dreams from blooming into more than what’s capable of being pursued here.
That, unsurprisingly, is something you know all too well.
“Can’t believe he’s driving.” Hyunjin laments as he wipes his floral scissors with a rag. “I used to spend my days changing his diapers and spoon feeding him redbulls– but now? Driving? My baby is all grown up.” he fake sniffles. “By the way, I’m gonna take my fifteen after I’m done snipping these tulips.”
You snort, bending down to take the crates of wilted flowers to the back for disposal. Hyunjin moves to help but you shake him off.
“Sounds good. Also, don’t let Innie hear you say that. I’m about a thousand percent sure he has the strength needed to throw you into the dumpster with one arm now.”
“My baby would never do that to me!” Hyunjin calls out as you round the corner, bumping open the back door with your hip. 
February brings a lot of rain in Jeju. Today is no different; fat drops landing on your head as soon as you stumble out into the alley behind the shop. Footsteps heavy on wet brick, you curse under your breath as you run as fast as you can to the dumpster.
There’s still a few supply boxes from yesterday’s shipment laying around. You meant to bring them in, but you were so exhausted that it slipped your mind while you struggled to make sure everything inside the shop was figured out.
Scrambling, you haul them in one by one, shoes squeaking against the floor as you alternate in and out, soggy cardboard pressed against the front of your apron. 
Hyunjin’s on break. A necessary one at that. You can’t bother him, especially not when he’s done enough by taking on more responsibility both as a physical worker and a newly actualized business partner recently. A few stacks of boxes and wet hair seem like a fair trade off for what he’s had to sacrifice in the past year now.
“Idiot,” you mumble, cursing yourself for carelessness. Your slip ups have been more frequent lately, evident in the way you constantly forget things and can’t seem to push away the haziness clouding your mind. 
If it weren’t for the timing of it all, you’d blame it on the weather. The gloominess. The overcast skies probably have some sort of hand in your lack of clarity. Shrouded.
But it’s February. And in Jeju— it rains.
By the time you make it back inside, you’re drenched. 
“You look like you just got dunked in a pool.” 
You frown, ringing your hair out into the trash bin by the door. It’ll definitely take time to dry off, both your hair and your clothes are soaked through.
Hyunjin watches with an amused look, arms crossed as he leans his back against the counter.
“Might as well have. It’s insane out there.” you sigh. “How was your break?”
You look up to find that his face has gone unreadable.
“Yeah, about that…” Hyunjin trails off, voice suddenly smaller than before.
“Everything okay?” 
“Yeah, yeah it’s just–” Hyunjin chews at his bottom lip.
You push past him into the supply room to switch out your apron just as he says, “Do you mind if I leave a little early today?”
You scoff, turning to face him. “Hwang Hyunjin,” you scold, lips twitching when he visibly startles at your tone, “You don’t have to ask me that. We’re partners now, remember? We run this place.” 
He shifts on his feet, still unsure.
“Besides,” you huff, tying a knot behind your back, “We were friends way before that, too. You don’t have to be all proper with me. Of course you can leave early. It’s slow today, I can take care of it.”
Hyunjin sighs after contemplating for a second. “Are you sure you’ll be okay, though?” 
When he stares at you for a moment too long, you know the real reason for his hesitation. It makes something twist deep in your gut.
Guilt, maybe, amongst other things.
“Of course.” you shrug, doing your best to seem nonchalant. 
Hyunjin’s ability to read people is kind of intense, a little scary at times. You happen to be one of his favorite subjects in that regard.
“Have fun. Tell Minah I said hi.”
He pales, sputtering around words as he struggles to say something. It’s cute, his plump lips opening and closing, eyes wild.
“I’m not going to see her! I’m–it’s just a movie! How did you—God, you’re so annoying. I should’ve made you trim the tulips. Hah!”
You giggle. “It’s funny that you think I wouldn’t know, especially with the way you love to actually make yourself look busy whenever she stops by to say hi.”
“I am busy.” he mumbles, looking away. “I just emphasize it a lot more when she’s here.”
“Sure,” you roll your eyes, “Let’s go with that.”
He whines a couple more times, trails after you around the shop and laughs when you swat him away with a rolled up newspaper that’s used for wrapping vases.
It’s loud. Easy. Hyunjin is a gentle reminder that normalcy still exists in your day to day, even if it’s hard to find. 
When he finally decides to leave, he lingers for a moment, triple checks that you’ll be okay. You roll your eyes for what feels like the millionth time today, but deep down you’re grateful. 
“Love you,” he says, one foot out the door. “Call me if you need anything.”
You shake your head, ignoring him. “Love you too.” 
And then he’s gone, a skip in his step as he heads down the sidewalk, leaving you with nothing but freshly-trimmed tulips and the sound of rain. 
“Herb snips, shears, tape…” you mumble, scanning the supply shelf. 
There’s not much to do in-shop right now. Almost all the arrangements have been tended to by Hyunjin already, his specialty being his keen eye. That’s why he handles the appeal of the shop, leaving you to figure out all the logistics. Learning it all was easier said than done.
In reality, it was never your intention to take over the shop at all. 
“When I die,” your grandma would always say, ignoring the way you groaned and begged her to stop bringing it up, “Sell this place. Use the money for something worthwhile. A trip to Greece, maybe?”
“Nana,” you would scold, glaring at her where she stood next to you, trimming a batch of roses.
Wrinkled hands that still held all the skill of youth. Fingers moving at a speed others could only ever dream of having– you included.
Your grandma handled flowers with the same amount of care she did everything else. It’s no wonder that when they grew they would lean in her direction, drawn to her like they would be the sun. 
“I’m not selling this place. It’s too special, too important. A vacation only lasts so long, Nana. This is forever.”
She would smile, turn petals over in her hand. Sometimes the marigolds would match the glow in her eyes, a testament to the belief you harbored as a child that she had the ability to sprout blossoms from her fingertips.
“The one thing you shouldn’t do, my dear, is rely on forever. Because that, too, is uncertain.”
You wish you hadn’t been so hard headed. Wish that you would’ve believed her, taken the time to listen, cherished the moment a little bit longer instead of relying on the promise of tomorrow.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Your grandmother was a wonderful woman.
She’ll be with you in your heart, forever.
Oh, what a lie forever is.
The shop stays empty for the rest of the day. There were a few passersby, all of whom simply stopped to scan the arrangements along the windows before giving a polite nod and carrying on their way. 
Realistically, the shop has no problem with attracting customers. It’s a sight to behold: mid-floor to ceiling windows with various displays, hanging baskets of winding greenery, countless arrangements that fill the shelves and add a pop of color, and a wide assortment of flowers for each season. 
The real issue lies in your inability to sell. Most people regard the place as being good for nothing more than window shopping and the usual photo-op.
Business has slowed since your Grandma passed; since you took over as the sole owner and were suddenly face to face with the task of making decisions in the shop’s best interest– both integrity wise and from a business standpoint.
“I know, I know,” you say around the pen cap between your teeth, “You used to be the brains around here, not me. I’m not creative enough for all of this, you know? No matter how much I try to be.”
You look up from where your notebook lays open, dozens of scribbles for arrangement ideas and planning. The picture on the wall stares at you, unmoving, eyes as bright as marigolds.
“Don’t give me that look.” 
She stares. A gaze that holds all the answers while also saying nothing at all.
“Ugh.” you groan, leaning your palms on the desk.
You allow your head to hang forward, defeated, exhaustion flooding your bones. 
Just as you’re about to speak again, to complain about yet another thing that probably has her rolling around in her grave, the bell at the front counter dings.
The clock on the desk reads 6:55pm, five minutes until close. You hadn’t even heard anyone come in.
“Be right there!” you call out, rushing to grab your apron from where you’d thrown it on one of the chairs. 
In your haste, the box of seed packets you’d been inventorying goes tumbling to the floor.
“Fuck,” you mutter, bending down to pick everything up. One more thing to add to the list today. 
Off-kilter. Disoriented. Exhausted. 
You sniffle a few times, blinking against the sting behind your eyes as you stand up to put the box back in its place.
One deep breath, a shake of your shoulders. Just enough to chase it all away until later. 
“Sorry about that,” you say cheerily, pushing past the hanging beads that separate the front of the shop from the back. “How can I help you?”
There’s a stranger, his back turned, attention focused on a batch of tulips. Freshly cut. White, blue, purple.
You realize, belatedly, that you’d forgotten to grab your apron in your haste to clean up the seed packets. Another slip up. Nana always prided herself in her apron, wore it like a badge of honor, raised you to do the same.
Just as you spin around to grab it, the stranger says, “It’s okay. I just, um, I wanted to say hi.”
You freeze. There’s a long moment where his voice rings loud in your ears, reverberates against the walls of your brain until it travels through your blood, the feeling like wildfire in your veins until it settles deep in the pit of your stomach. 
Slowly, you turn, heart clamoring in your chest, threatening to stop altogether as soon as you come face to face with the one person you never thought you’d see again.
Because there, at the front of the store, is Jisung.
Jisung, with wide eyes and parted lips. Jisung, with hair that still curls at the ends and falls in shags around his face. Jisung, broader, more actualized, now grown into his features but still undeniably soft around the edges. Jisung, with thick framed glasses pushed up his nose and silver hoops dangling from his ears. 
A stranger. But undoubtedly Jisung. 
“You look…nice.” he says, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly with his free hand.
Three words is all it takes. Ice turns to fire. The blood that had drained from your face returns with the blaze of a thousand suns, anger burning your throat. 
You reach forward, grab the remote for the neon Open sign and click the power button. Jisung watches in confusion.
“The shop is closed.” you manage on a shaky breath.
Jisung sighs, something heavy. “Listen, I’m—”
“The shop–” you try again, louder, “–is closed.” 
Jisung stares. His eyes are still the same velvety brown; big and round and just as you remember. 
There was once a time where the sight of Jisung in your Grandma’s shop made your heart sing. A soft tune, the thrum of a thousand harps, a song only for him.
His heart-shaped smile as he helped her hammer some of the shelves onto the wall. The sound of his laughter whenever you’d enter a sneezing fit from accidentally rubbing your face with a gloved hand. His rosy cheeks, burnt from the wind whipping past his face as he ran on foot to make sure you were okay the one time an angry customer smashed a vase on the floor and you called him crying.
But now, seeing him here, a stranger in a body you once knew like the back of your hand— it feels wrong. 
“I…” he trails off, registering the way your fists are clenched at your sides. 
“Okay,” he resigns, licking his lips. “I, uh– have a good night.”
He gives you one last look, bottom lip pulled tight between his teeth, and then slips out the door. You watch his retreating figure through the glass panel, dark gray skies muting the sound of your rattling heart.
It’s February. The tulips are in bloom. Jisung is back.
And in Jeju– it rains.
There’s an apple tree in the middle of town where Jisung told you he loved you for the first and last time. 
Off the corner, a few minutes down the road from where your houses stand a mere five hundred feet away from one another.
Your grandparents were farmers. Your grandma started her floral business a few years before you were born, a dream she always had that your grandpa urged her to pursue once he decided to sell the animals to a younger, more capable couple that could take care of them. 
Jisung’s parents, new residents on the island, looking to settle down and start a family. 
That’s how it happens. Yours and Jisung’s story, two authors of the same book, destined since the start.
Jisung was born on the same night your mother left you at your grandparents’ doorstep. One note, an apology, is all you’ve ever known about her. Your grandma never cared to indulge you. You’re glad in a way. She provided more than enough love to make sure you never felt an absence in her wake. 
The townspeople used to say you and Jisung were soulmates. Something about the heavens knowing he would need a friend, hence why you were delivered that night. From that moment on, the two of you were inseparable. 
Attached at the hip, you and Jisung grew up together. First steps, first birthdays, firsts for everything under the sun.
Jisung was there in the morning to walk with you to school and he was there at night when the two of you tucked into bed, sleepovers a regular occurrence, both of you counting the pale green stick-on stars dotting his ceiling until you fell asleep. 
Jisung was always around. He held your hand and walked with you to the nurse’s office the first time you got stung by a bee. He wiped your eyes when the boy you liked told you he only ever saw you as a friend, your first rejection. He sat with you under the stars the night your grandpa died, your face tucked into his neck as you stained the collar of his shirt with tears until you were too tired to cry. In the years that followed, he took care of you and your grandma like the two of you were his own. 
Jisung, for lack of a better word, was your first forever.
“You could come with me, you know.” 
Under the stars, real ones that time, Jisung had turned to you and offered the world. 
The air was cold. The apple tree was bare.
“It’ll be fun. We’ll be together, we’ll experience new things. I can do music and you can study all that history stuff you like to learn about. You know, nerdy things.”
“They’re not nerdy things, Ji. Don’t you know everything we have now is because of what’s happened before us?” you’d asked. “Doesn’t it make you wonder? Learning about the past helps us better understand the present, and ultimately the future.”
Jisung had hummed softly, an agreement. “I don’t care about the future, though.” he’d said. “I care about right now. You, me, this.” 
When you turned to look at him, he propped himself up on one elbow and stared down at you from above as the moon casted a halo around his head. 
“I love you,” he whispered, “And I want you to come with me.”
Jisung, with all the stars in his eyes and a heart full of dreams. Jisung, with the world at his fingertips and the ambition to make it his own. 
You, with all your hopes stuffed tight into a suitcase and chained to a boulder, thrown into the ocean. Sinking and sinking until it hit the bottom.
“I love you too,” you whispered back.
Images of marigolds flashed behind your eyes when you closed them, a tear rolling down your cheek. Jisung’s mouth was soft when he kissed it away, salt on his lips. Burning. 
“But I can’t.” you choked. 
Under the apple tree, Jisung told you he loved you for the first and last time. He promised that the distance would be no match for him, that he would traverse oceans to find his way back. He promised forever.
It was February. The tulips were in bloom. Jisung left to pursue his dreams with a guitar on his back and your heart in his hands. Your understanding of forever was shot at point blank. The bullet passed clean through you. 
And in Jeju– it rained.
“I think you should talk to him.”
The sun is out today. Perfect weather for another field harvest. The distributor had called you early in the morning to ask if you’d be willing to accept a drop off even though it’s the weekend. You’d agreed, calling in your most reliable help for the job.
“And I think you’re not helping.” you huff, snipping the head off another hyacinth.
“Agreed,” Hyunjin parrots from beside you, currently in the middle of putting together an arrangement, “This guy sounds like a total dick.”
Chan sighs from behind the two of you, his knees knocking against the legs of the desk when he swivels back and forth in the chair. 
Besides Hyunjin and Jeongin, both of whom moved into town after you’d already graduated, and of course, Jisung– Chan is your oldest friend. 
Chan was also a neighbor of yours. Three years older than you and Jisung, he was the one who acted as a role model for the two of you when growing up. Nowadays he helps his parents run the largest orange grove on the island during the day and DJs one of the clubs in the tourism hub at night. 
“Jisung’s not a dick, he’s just–”
“An asshole.” you finish, smirking when Hyunjin cackles. 
Chan sighs. Again. “Yeah okay, I’ll give you that one.”
“Listen, I know I’ve never met him, but isn’t it weird that he just, like, showed up?” Hyunjin asks, setting down his scissors. You continue trimming the hyacinths, listening halfheartedly.
“I mean, think about it. Dude disappears to pursue music, right? He’s gone for what– three years?”
“Four.” you correct.
“God, even worse.” he grimaces.
“But yeah, okay, four years. And then boom! He just strolls in through the front door without so much as a word during the time he was gone? No letters, no phone calls, not even a damn visit. Nothing! All so he can pop up and go ‘oh, you look nice’? Come on.” he scoffs, crossing his arms.
You wince, caught off guard because you’ve never really heard it phrased as bluntly as Hyunjin put it just then. It’s no surprise that he’s annoyed, having only just heard the full story thirty minutes ago. He’d been shocked, partly because you never told him and also because he just couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“Okay, yes, he was wrong for that. But isn’t part of you even just the least bit curious as to why?” 
You pause mid-snip, mulling Chan’s words over in your head.
The most frustrating part about it all is that you are curious. You wish you weren’t, though. Not when you’ve spent the past four years trying to convince yourself that you don’t need to know what Jisung’s been up to, don’t need to know if he’s been okay since he clearly held no concern for you in that regard anyways.
“What?” you ask when you realize that both boys are staring at you. 
“Well?” Hyunjin pushes. “Are you?”
You shrug. “No, not really.” 
There’s a total of five seconds that pass before Hyunjin is stomping over and hauling Chan up out of his chair, pushing him towards the front door as he protests.
“Out! Out, out, out, we have important business matters to discuss.”
“But we were supposed to get lunch—!”
“We’re taking a rain check!” Hyunjin fights back, shoving him out of the shop before he has a chance to answer. He drops the shade to cover the glass, Chan’s sad figure left alone on the other side.
You gape at him. “What was that for?”
Hyunjin scoffs. “You think you’re convincing? Think again.” 
He hops up on to the counter and gestures for you to do the same. When you do, he pulls you closer, grabs your hand in his, and pushes your head down until it’s resting on his shoulder. 
“Tell me the truth now,” he says, soft. “I know there’s more to it.”
Hyunjin’s warm to the touch. The heat seeps through the fabric of his shirt, igniting the skin of your cheek until you feel like you’re standing too close to the sun. A star. Hyunjin is a light in your tunnel.
“I am curious,” you start, “About him, I mean. I’ve– I don���t know. It’s been so long. I tried to pretend I didn’t care when I saw him, but the minute I looked into his eyes it was like I was eighteen again. Eighteen and happy and looking at someone that I always thought would be there, you know?” 
Hyunjin hums but doesn’t say anything. He squeezes your hand once, a signal to keep going. 
“I’m scared, though. Part of me doesn’t want to know.”
Hyunjin takes a deep breath. “What are you scared of?”
Through the gaps in the beads you can see into your office, the picture of your Grandma hanging on the wall. She stares at you, unblinking. 
“What if he tells me that it’s true?” you ask, lifting your head to look up at him. “What if he says that I was right, that he didn’t care? That he left and didn’t want to call because it no longer mattered to him? That he loves his life there and only came back to clear his own conscience?” 
“Oh honey,” Hyunjin soothes, pulling you into his chest. You hadn’t realized you were crying, that the anger and fear had bubbled over until there were tears falling down your cheeks, wetting the fabric of Hyunjin’s sweater. 
He lets you cry for a while. It’s nothing new; Hyunjin has seen you break down countless times. He’s been there through the worst of it, held your hand even in the aftermath. He’s picked you up off the floor more times than you can count, has grounded you when you felt like the world was gonna open up beneath you and swallow you whole. Salt of the earth, returning you to its core.
Once you’ve quieted into nothing more than shallow breaths and a few scattered hiccups, Hyunjin speaks again.
“Can you be honest with me?”
You nod, the hair stuck to your cheek with tears rubbing against his shoulder. 
“Do you love him?”
It nearly knocks the wind out of you. This concept, so foreign to you now, shoved to the back of your mind to make room for the things that matter most. Hospital visits, labor cuts, wage increases— none of it left any room for love, let alone the thought of someone else. Especially someone as all-consuming as Jisung.
Slowly, you inhale, breath shaking on the exhale. Hyunjin squeezes your hand to remind you that he’s there.
“I don’t think I ever stopped, Hyune.”
The silence stretches thin. The realization is dizzying. Years of suppressed emotions, of telling yourself and everyone around you that it wasn’t a big deal. The sad eyes of the townspeople whenever they’d see you sitting beneath the apple tree. The gentle touch of your grandma’s hand when she’d find you on the front steps alone, staring at the stars. The soft hum of the radio in the shop, set to a playlist of all the songs he’s written, the only reminder that somewhere out there he was doing well.
The final crack in the dam, its water pushing until it gives way.
“Then you owe it to yourself,” Hyunjin says. “You owe it to your heart to get an answer. Free yourself from this pain, love. Don’t let yourself suffer forever.”
Forever. That word again. No matter how many times you’ve tried to escape it, it always comes back.
“It’s gonna hurt.” he sighs, tightening his grip when you sniffle. “It’s gonna hurt so fucking bad, babe. But you can take it. You’ve got people who love you enough to stand in front of you and soften the blow from time to time. But you’ll be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”
He hops down from the counter and moves to stand in front of you, right between your legs. Placing both hands on your shoulders, he pushes until you’re sitting with your back straight and lifts your chin. 
“You deserve an answer.” he says, with conviction this time. “Okay?”
He lets his thumb swipe beneath your eyes, smiles softly. Unconditional— that’s what he is. Hyunjin burns brighter than any star in your sky, the heat wrapping its arms around you like it’s too scared to let go, to watch you freeze and die out like so many others. 
“I don’t deserve you, though.” you say, laughing wetly when he rolls his eyes.
“Shut up,” he chuckles, pulling you in for a hug, “You deserve everything and more.”
When Jisung comes into the shop two days later, you’re ready for it. 
Chan had talked to him. No surprise, really, not when he’s been letting him crash in his spare room ever since he figured out that he was holed up in one of the hotels out in the tourism hub. 
If there’s one thing about Chan, it’s that he’d rip the shirt off his back to clothe anyone in need. Housing a friend is nothing, especially when that friend is Jisung.
“I don’t know how much of a consolation this is,” he’d said nervously, watching as you regarded him with an expectant look, “But he’s pretty cut up about you not wanting to see him. Which, I know, is stupid. He is the one who fucked up. But I just– I don’t know. I’ve never seen him like this, I guess.”
It’s not a consolation, not really. Knowing that Jisung is struggling is far from anything you want to hear. 
Sure, there’s anger present. Anyone would be stupid to not feel the least bit frustrated with what’s happened. Years lost, time stripped away. But you’ve long since come to terms with it, the anger turning to sadness in the meantime.
“Also, he leaves tomorrow.” Chan smiled sadly. “He really wants to talk to you before then.”
Hyunjin left early again today to give the two of you space. Not before making a show of his own though, threatening to incite violence with his arms that are supposedly ‘shredded’ from years of lifting boxes filled with petunias. 
The shop is slow again, not many sales nor a lot of foot traffic. Usually when the sun is out there’s more to do; people to see, smiles to give. But there’s nothing, just the chirping of birds and the sound of cars rolling by. 
Maybe the world knows that this is what you need. The calm before the storm. 
Five minutes until close. You’ve spent most of the day pacing back and forth. Waiting. Anticipating. 
Chan had said Jisung planned on stopping by, trying again. You’d told him that was okay, and his eyes lit up. Too much hope, maybe, that something might come of this. 
You’re seated in the back office, staring at marigold colored irises when the front door opens. You hear it this time, ears fine tuned, waiting. 
Slowly, you stand, make your way to the front. You don’t realize you’re holding your breath until you pull back the beaded curtain and Jisung’s figure comes into view. 
He looks the same as he did the other day: curled hair, thick glasses, parted lips. His sweater, fluffy and striped, hangs off of his shoulders in a way that boxes off his tapered waist, one that you know is hidden beneath all the layers. The sleeves are way too long judging by the way it curls over his fingers. 
“Hi.” he breathes out, watching as you step into full view.
You blink. “Hi, Jisung.”
His name feels weird on your tongue. Bitter. It’s been years since you uttered it, forbidding yourself from the luxury out of fear that it would make his absence more real. Talking about him in the past tense always scared you off before you could even get the chance. 
“How– How’ve you been?” he chews on the inside of his lip.
You want to scold him, tell him to stop the habit just like you always would in the past. He’d make a joke then, tell you to kiss him so that he had something else to do instead. You would laugh, feign disgust, but in the back of your mind you’d wanted it more than anything. 
You’d waited for it, the day you could kiss him without warning and melt into his touch as he kissed you back. Another stupid bet on forever; the belief that you had all the time in the world for things to get to that point.
“I’ve been better.” you say, taking a deep breath. “What about you?”
Good, you think. He’s been good. He looks good. He doesn’t need this place.
“Me too.” he says instead. “I’ve been better.”
You don’t know what to say to that. Silence fills the room, heavy on both your chests. The anticipation feels like it might kill you before anything else does. 
“I’m sorry that–”
“Is that all you came here to say?” you cut him off.
“What?” he asks, confused. “No, I– no.”
“What, then? What is it you want to say, Jisung?” your voice is firm. He winces when his name leaves your mouth. “Because, honestly, I’ve waited all this time to hear literally anything from you, and if all that comes out of this is that you’ve ‘been better’ I might actually lose my fucking mind.”
The words tumble out faster than you intend. You can’t help it, not with the way anxiety has been bubbling over in your chest since the moment you woke up this morning. You could barely sleep last night, not when you were playing out every possible scenario in your head, the anticipation of it all making your sheets feel scratchy against your skin and the lumps in your pillow more discernible. 
“No, no, of course I wouldn’t do that.” he says quickly. “It's just that I didn’t know where to start. I don’t know how much you’ll allow me to say, what the boundary is here. I didn’t want to just barge in and demand you listen to me. You don’t owe me that. You don’t owe me anything. Not after what I did.”
What I did, his voice rings loud in your ears. He’s aware of it, of the pain he caused. 
He takes a step forward, and then another, again and again until he’s right up against the front counter, an arm’s length away. 
Your breath catches then, when you see him up close for the first time in four years, see the way he’s grown and changed with your own eyes. 
Stubble dotting his chin, laugh lines around his mouth, the dip and curve of the bow above his lips that you always loved. Brown eyes, soil and stardust. 
“Tell me what your conditions are,” he says quietly, “And I’ll give you every explanation I have.”
The sincerity on his face is blinding. Your stomach twists at the thought of hearing what he has to say, that same fear brewing in the pit of it. You take a deep breath, feel the phantom ghost of a hand squeezing yours and a crescent moon eye smile. 
“I waited four years for you.” you say.
“I know.”
“I trusted that you’d be back. That you would keep in touch during the time you were gone.”
“I–” his voice cracks. “I know.”
“You lied to me.”
Jisung tips his head back then. Swallows down a lump in his throat. Blinks rapidly at the ceiling, veins of ivy crawling along the expanse of it.
“I know.”
“So you owe me everything. I deserve that. I deserve answers.”
When he brings his head down to look at you, it’s unreadable. A mix of emotions that you aren’t familiar enough with anymore to decipher. Fear, guilt, sorrow. Hope, too. Maybe.
You stare at him head on, fully letting your eyes meet for the first time in what feels like an eternity. He holds your gaze, unwavering. Determined. The sight makes your heart clench. 
“Okay,” he says after a beat of silence. “Okay. I can do that.”
Despite the ever-growing mountain of things to address, you decide that the first thing you want to hear from Jisung is about his time in Seoul. 
You’re only human, after all.
Best friends from the start– you can’t stop yourself from wondering what life has been like for him. Jisung’s always been good at storytelling, animated in his features and gestures to the point that you’d be rolling around and clutching your stomach from laughter. It’s one of the things you missed the most, just talking and being present in one another’s lives.
The two of you end up at one of the diners down the road. The owners, an elderly couple, coo as soon as they catch sight of you.
“My flower girl,” the old lady, Mrs. Kim, greets.
“Mrs. Kim,” you beam, moving in for a hug. When you pull away, Jisung is behind you, hands clasped behind his back and feet together like he has his tail between his legs.
“Halmeoni,” you say, gesturing at him, “Do you remember Jisungie?” 
His eyes go wide at the nickname, and you try to ignore the heat creeping up your neck, avoiding his gaze and instead watching as Mrs. Kim blinks in surprise.
“Oh! Oh my goodness, our Jisungie? Honey! Honey, look, Jisung is here! Oh you crazy boy,” she scolds, rushing forward to hit his shoulder and pull him in for a hug. “Where have you been? It’s been ages!” 
Jisung lets out an oof! as her body slams into him, all of his anxiousness dissolving into laughter as he hugs her back. 
“Hi Mrs. Kim, how have you been?” 
“Me?” she asks, pulling him away to hold at arm’s length, “Nevermind about me! I’m old! How have you been?”
Good, you think again, a mimic of earlier. Jisungs eyes flit over to yours for the smallest of moments before he answers.
“Better,” he says. “I’m doing better.”
Once both Mr. and Mrs. Kim are done doting over the both of you, they seat you by the window.
The island is always beautiful on sunny days: trees swaying, golden rays painting the rooftops in hues of pink and orange, the indigo shimmer of the ocean off in the distance.
“So,” you say, catching Jisung’s attention, “Tell me about Seoul.”
He hums. “It’s busy. Stinks. Lots of people.”
“Dream come true, yeah?” you joke, taking a sip of your water.
Jisung chuckles. “You could say that, I guess.”
“I mean, it was yours.”
“It was.” he sighs, looking down at the table. “I don’t know. It’s nice. I met good people, made even better connections. I live in this one bedroom studio apartment just outside of Itaewon, so I’m close to where all the foreigners hang out. I’ve learned a lot, gained a lot of inspiration for my music.”
You follow along, staring at him intently. His mouth, still heart-shaped, twitches when he catches you in the act.
You clear your throat, glancing away. “Yeah, I’ve– uh, I’ve heard some of your songs.”
He raises his eyebrows, almost like he hadn’t expected you to say that. “Really?”
“Yeah. I mean, I hear them on the radio sometimes.” A lie. “It usually takes me a second to realize that it’s you.” Another lie. “But they’re good, you’re doing well.”
Pink dusts the tops of Jisung’s cheeks as he turns back to the window, clearing his throat.
He looks younger like this, like he’s still the same boy who would sit across from you all those years ago. Cherry-stained lips and a smile so bright it put the sun to shame.
He talks a bit more about his music, about how he’s with a good company that gives him creative freedom and enough support to pursue more if he desires.
His eyes light up when he tells you about his studio, a small room on the fifth floor of a building in the middle of the city where he does all of his writing. It’s equipped with an entire soundboard, full of instruments that he says he’s been able to get signed by artists that come in and out. Most notably, his guitar, the same one he left with. 
Slowly, like a flower blossoming, petals opening one by one, you feel yourself falling back into step with him.
Everything is so familiar: the curve of his smile, the tilt in his voice when he gets excited, the rumble of laughter when he recounts an embarrassing run-in with an A-list celebrity in the company’s cafeteria. He shares stories that fill your heart as the two of you fill your stomachs.
But with the ease comes something more, something you recognize as longing. You hadn’t realized how much you longed to be there through this part of his life, how you wished you’d been the one to answer a video call as he showed off his apartment the first day he moved in, his company badge when it was newly issued, every moment of happiness that you’d been absent for just as much as he was absent for yours.
He seems to share the same sentiment then, when he sets down his fork and stares at his empty plate. 
“You run the shop now,” he says, “How’s that been?”
You purse your lips, nodding your head slowly. You knew this conversation would happen, that it was coming.
“It’s good, I guess. Been almost a year now since, uh, it was left to me.” you shrug. “I’m not alone though, Hyunjin is a big help. I don’t know what I’d do without him.”
Jisung noticeably bristles. Eyebrows pulled together, staring more intently at a crumb on his plate. It looks like there’s a lot he wants to say, like he can’t find the words to say them.
So, naturally, you do it for him. 
“I assume Chan told you so I wouldn’t have to, by the way.”
He looks up then, as if he wasn’t expecting you to address the very obvious elephant in the room.
“He did, yes.” Jisung says after a while. His voice is quiet, gentle, like he’s walking on eggshells. “I– I didn’t know how to bring it up. I assume you’ve heard it all already but– I really, really am sorry to hear about Nana.”
The way her name sounds coming out of his mouth turns your mind to static.
Suddenly you’re in the hospital again, monitors beeping, hands as soft as petals cradled in your own and wishing that you could bury your face in a familiar neck as you cried and watched the marigolds wilt. 
“I don’t need an apology for that.” you croak, blinking back tears. Jisung is somewhere in your periphery, your vision blurry around the edges.
“It wasn’t sad. Her life, I mean. It was full. Of love. Of light. She left this place happy. That’s what she told me, at least.”
You take a deep breath. “So don’t be sorry about it.”
Jisung sniffles, and the sound shoots straight through your chest. 
“I know. I just– I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I should’ve been. I had no idea that–”
“Nobody did, Jisung. Don’t punish yourself for that.”
He sees it then, when you finally meet his eyes, the acceptance. You’ve come to terms with things a long time ago, have fought tooth and nail to come out on the other side of all the guilt and resentment and grief alive. Scathed, but alive nonetheless.
“You’re right.” he sighs, wiping at his eyes quickly. “She’d probably yell at me for saying that.”
You laugh, suddenly, the noise startling him. Jisung looks at you like you’re crazy.
“I think she has a lot more to yell at you for than being sorry that she died.”
The bluntness punches a chuckle out of him, and you giggle at the thought.
Your grandmother was always such an outspoken person. She always said what was on her mind, speaking it loud. There’s no doubt that if she was here she’d be berating Jisung, smacking him upside the head before pulling him into a hug and cooking his favorite meal. Tough love, but still, love.
“She would’ve loved to be able to see you.” you say once your laughter dies out, the air a bit lighter between the two of you. “She always wondered if you’d grow your hair out without her around to nag you about keeping it short.” 
He reaches up to run a hand through his curls, the strands falling around his face in a way that has your heart stammering in your chest.
“Well, clearly I don’t know how to listen.”
“No, you don’t.”
Jisung smiles softly. “Maybe I’ll cut it now. You know, since I’m here. And because I know she’d want me to.”
You watch him carefully, searching his eyes. For what, you don’t know. All that’s in them are stars. 
“Yeah,” you say quietly. “You’re here.”
By the time the two of you leave the diner, stomachs full and enough bags of extra side dishes hanging off of your arms to last you at least two weeks, courtesy of Mrs. Kim, the sun is almost fully set. 
The ocean is calm, the evening breeze just barely brushing the surface of the tide. Jisung walks in step with you down the street, one side of his face cast in a glow from the sun’s fading rays. 
“Do you think you’d maybe want to stop by the arcade that Old Man Park runs? Just for a little?”
You snort. “Why? So I can embarrass you?”
“Hey!” he puts a hand on his chest, offended. “I’ll have you know that I let you win all those times.”
“How do you let someone win after spending hours practicing while I worked at the shop?”
“I was being nice!”
“Uh huh.”
“Don’t believe me?” he grins. You try not to look, afraid of how bad your blood pressure might spike from the sight. 
“I’ll have you know that I’m one of the best Kart Rider players in the PC Bang scene back in Seoul.”
“Jisung,” you scold, “That’s a computer game. These are coin-ops. There’s way more skill needed.”
“No there isn’t!”
He knocks his shoulder against yours, tucking his chin to his chest to hide his smile when you try to fight back.
It’s easy. Nice. There’s a soft melody echoing in the dust-covered chambers of your heart. You still know all the chords.
Old Man Park’s arcade is a few doors down from the shop. You stop there to drop off the food, spare a glance in the mirror hanging in your office to fix your hair.
Your grandma’s picture stares at you from the other wall, eyes bright.
“Love you,” you say, kissing the skin of your fingertips and pressing it gently against the frame.
Jisung is toeing at a few rocks on the sidewalk when you walk back out. He doesn’t see you, too busy with his eyes casted down at the concrete, hands shoved into his pockets. 
It’s still hard to believe that he’s here. Flesh and bone. For a long time it felt like he was nothing but a distant dream, someone who only existed in the memories that you kept locked deep within your heart, the key somewhere on the streets of Seoul.
“Ready?” you ask.
He looks up, his glasses moving when his cheeks round into a smile.
Something passes across his face– a myriad of emotions in just a fraction of a second. Hesitantly, he holds out his hand. Long, delicate fingers.
You stare at it, swallowing roughly around the butterfly wings flapping inside your throat. 
The one thing you shouldn’t do, my dear, is rely on forever. Because that, too, is uncertain.
Forever isn’t promised. But even then, there are things you know for sure:
It’s February. The tulips are in bloom. Jisung is here. Living, breathing, in the flesh. 
So you take his hand, watch as relief floods his features, and let yourself feel.
The wind in your hair, the calluses on Jisung’s palms, and the warmth radiating out of the smile that threatens to split his face into two.
And with that certainty, the two of you start walking. A silent agreement to focus on the now.You. Him. This.
“God, I can’t believe everything is only one coin.”
You laugh, watching as the multi-colored lights cast a glow on Jisung’s face. 
“Stop acting like you don’t remember this place.”
“I don’t!” he argues, smiling. “We stopped coming here, what, in middle school? Once Chan hyung started driving? We would always ask him to take us to the other one out in the big town!”
Chan’s first car was an old Camry with leather seats and enough room for the three of you to pile into after school. Used, but still with enough juice to satisfy three young kids who felt like they were on top of the world.
You used to sit in the back, the wind whipping your hair every which way while yours and Jisung’s hands lay side by side in the middle seat, pinkies brushing but neither of you willing to take it further. 
“Oh, shit!” Jisung gasps, letting go of your hand as he runs up to the space invaders machine. 
“Here we go,” you sigh, following after him. He’s like a kid in a candy store, face filled with innocent wonder and joy.
“Aren’t there, like, I don’t know– things better than this in Seoul?” you ask as he shoves a coin into the game.
Jisung turns to look at you with a devilish grin. “Obviously,” he says, “But I can’t beat anyone’s high score over there. Here though? Ha! This place is ancient. I can finally be at the top of the leaderboard in something.”
“We’ll see about that.” you mumble, the noise of the game booting up drowning you out. 
Jisung sticks his tongue out when he focuses really hard on things. It’s cute, the way the end of it sits between his lips, spit-slick and parted just a little bit.
He’s glowing, probably because of the lights, hues of red and green and blue flashing across his face. But then again, Jisung has always shined brighter than anything. 
The game beeps to signal that he has one life left. He grunts a few times, his fingers tapping the buttons madly as his other hand handles the joystick in a frenzy of movements.
When it ends, he groans, throws his hands up in defeat.. 
You shake your own head knowingly, watching his eyes bug out of their sockets as soon as the leaderboard appears on the screen, the 8-bit letters blinking at him. 
“You’re joking.” he laughs in disbelief, turning to stare at you. “Please tell me you’re joking.” 
There, on the screen, is your name. The highest score. Jeongin and Hyunjin’s names sit just below you, respectively.
“What was that again about finally being able to be at the top?” you mock him, smirking.
“Since when did you get good at this?”
You shrug. “Had to find something to do in my free time.”
“No,” he says, rolling up his sleeves. “Nuh-uh. No way. This is not happening. I will beat you.” he holds out his hand for another coin, to which you roll your eyes and place one in his palm. 
“You might as well give up now. We’ll be here all night.”
“In your dreams.” he scoffs, assuming his position as another round loads onto the screen.  
Jisung has always been competitive. It’s one of his more hidden characteristics. 
It persists still, you realize, as you watch him burn through the styrofoam cup of coins that Old Man Park had given the two of you. Free of charge for old time’s sake.
Fort-five minutes. All he’s managed to do is bump Hyunjin down to fourth.
“Ugh!” he groans, kicking the machine lightly with his foot. 
“Look at you throwing a tantrum.”
“I’m not throwing a tantrum.” he pouts. You raise an eyebrow.
“Okay fine. I’m throwing a tantrum.” 
“Thought so.”
“Can you blame me?” he asks. “This is, like, our first date. And I’m sucking. Hard.”
“Our–” you stop, eyes wide. Jisung mimics you, almost like he didn’t mean to say what he did. 
Heat rushes to your cheeks. Your mind goes blank. But the world doesn’t end. Time keeps moving. Jisung is still here.
“I didn’t–”
“I like the sound of that.” you say quickly. “Of this being our first date, I mean.’
He smiles. Slow and sweet like molasses. Blinding.
“And the fact that you suck.”
The moment is shattered, his resulting whine echoing throughout the arcade.
“Come on you big baby,” you laugh, grabbing his hand. “I know a game you can beat me at.”
He lets himself be pulled, pretending that he’s upset, but you can see the smile tugging at his lips when you lace your fingers together.
The feeling is still new, this ease you have with him. The wounds you sported all those years are still healing, some more fresh than others. But with each laugh that comes out of Jisung’s mouth and shared glance, every note that your heart sings, you can feel them beginning to fade. A balm to soothe the burn.
The Pac-Man game is situated in the back corner of the arcade, right next to the jukebox. It used to be your favorite, because Jisung would always use his own coins to play songs for you while you tried to score higher than twenty-five thousand points. 
When you get there, he frowns. “The only game you think I can beat you at is Pac-Man?” 
“I don’t think,” you say, grabbing a coin before shoving the cup into his chest. “I know.”
The game boots up instantly, and you smile softly to yourself when Jisung moves wordlessly behind you, slips a coin into the jukebox.
“Play something good, Jisungie.”
He freezes. Out of the corner of your eye you watch him stare at you for a long moment. And then he smiles. Stardust.
“You got it.”
In a matter of seconds, Lovers In A Dangerous Time by Bruce Cockburn rings throughout the arcade, the speakers on the ceiling fighting past the static.
An old song. The same one your grandparents would dance to in the mornings, eggs on the stove and love in the air.
Your grandma used to say it was written for them, because when they fell in love the war was at its peak and she didn’t know if he’d ever come home. 
After he passed, she still played it, except those times it was Jisung who twirled her around and painted a smile on her face as you watched from the same spot you grew up in. Always there.
Jisung, Jisung, Jisung. 
When the game starts, you try your best. It’s hard. You’ve always been terrible at anything involving quick decisions. Focusing on everything at once isn’t easy for you, that much is still true. 
“Shit.” you mumble, the top right corner of the screen reading ten thousand points as the ghosts run into you.
Jisung lets out a low whistle. “Harsh.”
“You wanna go back to space invaders and waste the last of our money?” you raise an eyebrow. 
He holds his hands up in surrender. “Sorry, sorry. Go ahead.” he says, holding the cup out for you to take another coin. 
You try a couple more times, failing each and every one. You can tell that Jisung is growing more and more amused with every attempt, and the smugness radiating off of him is starting to rub you the wrong way.
“If you’re so good,” you say after a particularly sad attempt, turning to glare at him. Jisung has his lips pulled tight to stop himself from laughing. “Then why don’t you try?”
He chuckles then. “I’d rather help you, if you’ll let me.”
“How are you supposed to do that? We only have one coin left.”
Jisung doesn’t say anything. He puts the cup down, the last coin held between his fingers. You watch as he slips it into the machine, move to get out of his way once he’s done, but he stops you by grabbing your hand and spinning you back around, his fingers placed over yours on the joystick. 
With your back flush against his front, caged in by his arms on either side, Jisung takes a deep breath.
“This okay?” he asks right next to your ear, the curls on the side of his head brushing your cheek when he leans down to get a better look at the screen.
Warm. He’s so warm. The material of his sweater only worsens the heat, and the faint scent of vanilla makes your head swim.
It’s more than okay. Great, even. It’s Jisung. Everything and more.
“Yeah,” you say, letting him control your hands as he flicks the joystick. “It’s okay.”
The hair against your cheek moves when he smiles. “Good.” he says, and then hits the start button.
The game begins but you’re barely processing what’s happening, too aware of the feeling of his body pressed against yours. 
A firm chest, different from what’s observable on the outside, what with the fluffiness of his sweater and soft features. His arms too, encasing you, the bulge and flex of his biceps every time he moves.
It’s all so intoxicating, so much so that you don’t even realize you’ve beaten the highest score in the system by the time he loses his last life. 
“What?” you blink. “What the hell?!”
You laugh, spinning to face Jisung who’s grinning from ear to ear. In your excitement, you jump, flinging your arms around his neck. He’s surprised, but catches you nonetheless, circling his arms around your waist.
“Holy shit how’d you do that!” you squeal while he swings you around, feet off the ground.
“Magic, I guess.” he chuckles. 
The closeness of his voice brings you crashing back down, suddenly aware of what position you’re both in. You pull back quickly, clear your throat, and watch as his face falls from the loss of contact.
It’s been a long time since you hugged Jisung. The thought transports you to that day four years ago, standing under the apple tree, the future uncertain. Forever promised.
Things are different now.
“Sorry,” he backtracks. “I didn’t– um, I wasn’t trying to–”
You cut him off by throwing yourself at him for a second time. Intentional. Breathless. Tired of running and acting like it’s not the thing you want most in the entire world.
Jisung doesn’t react until he feels your face against the skin of his neck. On instinct, he hugs tight, hands around your waist, breathing in the smell of your hair.
“Hi.” you whisper against him. 
One word. Simple. However the weight of it sends a chill down his spine. It feels like home. 
He tightens his hold. A silent understanding. The two of you never had much of a need for words anyways. 
“Hi.” he whispers back.
The apple tree is much bigger now.
Long, thick branches, a wide trunk, a slight tilt in its shape.
It’s bare. The season is long gone. But it’s okay, because it means that the view of the stars isn’t blocked when you and Jisung lay beneath it.
It’s the same but it isn’t. There’s gaps– periods of time where the two of you grew separately. There are moments and memories tucked away that neither of you know about, whole lives to discover. 
But even so, it feels right. His arm wrapped around you, your head on his chest. The stars and the moon. You and Jisung.
It’s nice. Perfect, even. But there’s a conversation that needs to be had. One that can’t be put off any longer.
“Ji.”
“Hm?”
“Can I ask you something?”
Jisung shifts beneath you, tightening his hold. The grass is damp. Neither of you care, too caught up in each other to stress about whether or not it’ll stain.
“Of course.”
“Am I ever gonna see you again?”
He takes a deep breath. “Yes.”
“You said that last time.”
“I know.”
“So what makes this different?” you ask, sitting up. He watches you carefully, eyes trained on every movement like he’s scared you’ll get up and run away.
When he realizes you’re waiting for an answer, he sits up too, pulls his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around his legs. 
He doesn’t say anything, just wordlessly reaches into his pocket. Silently, he hands whatever he grabbed to you. A guitar pick..
It’s white, a marbled design. Golden flecks infused into the lines. There, on the front, is a singular marigold. When you flip it over, you’re met with a tulip. 
“Do you remember that one time, when you called me crying at midnight because Nana told you that she didn’t know if she’d be able to afford school in the city?”
You nod silently, still turning the guitar pick over in your hand. 
It was one of those nights where the rain was relentless. Monsoon season always tagged on to the tail end of the school year, bringing with it a more intense gloominess than usual. 
You’d been angry. Stressed. Irritated that other kids at school were making plans to go to the mainland for college and you were stuck helping your grandmother trim foliage and wrap vases in newspaper.
“You told me that you couldn’t do it anymore.” Jisung whispered, staring up at the sky. “That you were tired of being here. That you needed to get out.”
You remember. Jisung had walked through the rain to show up at your window. Had climbed in with muddy shoes and sat on the floor of your room with you until the downpour stopped and your tears dried.
“And I said that I would make it happen, that I would invent a way to live amongst the stars so you could be as far from here as possible.”
“So what?” you ask, looking at him. “Did you finally do it, then? Is that why you came back?”
“Don’t be like that.”
“No, Jisung, I’m gonna fucking be like that.” you scoff, rising to your feet. 
There’s a fire in your veins, stoked until the embers are burning hot against your throat. Too good to be true. You should’ve known that there was no explanation left for him to give.
Jisung scrambles to his feet. “It wasn’t like I wanted to–”
“Oh like hell you did.” you say, turning to face him. “Four years, Jisung. I waited four years and you just– you come back and decide to tell me about some make-believe bullshit to save yourself and feel less guilty about the fact that you left.”
“It wasn’t make-believe to me,” he argues. “It was real. Everything I said was real. I left and I tried for years to make something of myself so I could come back here and get you.”
“Oh so it’s my fault? I made you leave, is that it?”
“That’s not what I said.”
“So then say something else!” you yell. The stars rumble, threatening to fall out of the sky. “Say something else, then, Jisung. Why didn’t you call? Huh?”
“Because I–” he stops, licks his lips. “God. Fuck. I couldn’t face you if I had nothing to show for myself, okay? It wasn’t fair to you for me to leave you behind just so I could fail.”
“Ha!” you laugh, running a hand through your hair in disbelief. “So you decided to go radio silent instead? Decided to not only leave me alone but let me suffer and wonder about where you were because that’s so much better than telling me that you were struggling, right? Great choice, Jisung. Really.”
He blinks a few times, watching as you pace back and forth in the grass. 
Anger bubbles deep in your gut. This whole time, he knew. It was a conscious decision. Jisung deliberately didn’t contact you because he chose not to.
“Did you ever even love me?”
The words tumble out before you can stop them. Jisung’s entire body goes rigid, his face falling and eyes hardening within a fraction of a second.
“Watch what you say.” he says, his voice low in his chest.
“I wouldn’t have to if you’d just be honest.”
“I’m trying.” he pleads. His eyes are glossy. Big and round behind his glasses. Illuminated by the moon. 
“I fucked up, okay? I prioritized myself and the way I felt over you and fucked everything up. But I tried. I tried so fucking hard. And I’m sorry it took me so long but I wanted– no–  I needed to make sure that I had everything figured out before I came back. I promised I would.”
“No, Jisung, you promised me that–”
“I’m not talking about you.” he says then, taking a deep breath. “You weren’t the only one I made promises to back then.”
Before you have a chance to speak, Jisung says, “I promised her. I told her I’d get you out of here. That I’d give you a life that you deserved, because she knew she couldn’t.”
You drop to your knees when the first sob hits, the force of it racking your body so hard you feel like you’re drowning. Jisung catches you on the fall, holds you up, lets you bury your face into his neck like he had so many times before.
“She told me you believed in forever. She wanted me to give that to you. I’m sorry it took me so long.”
Jisung lets you cry. He holds you through the storm, your wails as loud as thunder and tears as heavy as rain. Four years in the making; the sky and the earth colliding until the dirt and layers of sediment give way to the molten core that’s been hiding beneath the surface all along.
Pain. Grief. All of it pent up and leading to this moment. 
“You should’ve told me.” you cry, beating a fist into Jisung’s chest. “You idiot. You fucking idiot. You should’ve told me.” 
Jisung pulls you in closer, takes each hit as long as it means that it’ll soften the blow on your heart. He whispers apologies in your ear, runs a hand through your hair. 
When it quiets again, the worst of the storm gone, he shifts so that your head is in his lap, his legs crossed and tucked beneath him. A few stray tears wet the fabric of his jeans, your eyes focused on the field of flowers across the street.
“I won’t ask you to come with me.” he says after a long while, when your breathing has evened out. “I know that things are different. You have a life here that you’ve made for yourself, responsibilities to bear as well.”
He pauses to push a few strands of hair out of your face. His fingers are gentle against the skin of your cheek.
“But I promise it’ll be different. I spent too long away from you, was too selfish for my own good. I won’t disappear again. I’ll call every day. I’ll visit. You’ll get every part of me that I kept away from you all this time, and I’ll get every part of you in return.”
Your heart thrums. The thought of having what you’ve wanted for so long. Of having Jisung.
“And when you’re ready, when you feel like you can’t do it anymore, there’ll be a place for you.”
His voice is firm. Confident. More sure than he’s ever sounded before in his life.
When you turn to face him, he’s already staring back. Jisung, with all the stars in his eyes and a heart full of dreams. Jisung, with the world at his fingertips and the offer to make it yours.
Under the apple tree, Jisung leans down and kisses you for the first time. Twenty four years later, soft and slow, his lips a perfect fit against yours. A starboy and his flower girl. His glow is so bright it makes blossoms sprout from her fingertips.
Soft curls tickle your eyelids when he pulls away to rest his forehead against yours. You reach up to run a hand through them, smiling softly when he presses a kiss to the tip of your nose. 
“I love you.” you say first this time. 
He reaches out a hand, closes it over your fist that’s still clutching the guitar pick. A marigold and a tulip, both working together to make a perfect harmony. 
“I love you, too.” Jisung whispers back. “Forever.”
Jisung stops by the shop early to say goodbye.
There’s less tears this time, less of a reason to be sad. But still, when he wraps his arms around you, vanilla filling your nose and curls against your face, you feel your composure crumble.
“Every day.” he says, repeating the same thing he did all night. “I promise. Morning and night. Also at lunch. Oh, and on your days off. Matter of fact, you can call when you’re on the toilet too.”
The last part earns him an elbow to the ribs, his laughter bubbling up and out of his throat as he tries to dodge any and all subsequent attacks.
He kisses you stupid before he goes, Chan rolling his eyes from his car out front. You flip him off blindly, Jisung’s lips still attached to yours, earning a loud honk in response.
When he leaves, the shop is quiet, the only sound being the buzzing of your phone as Jisung blows it up with text messages the second the car pulls away.
You’re too busy replying, giggling to yourself when a slew of cute emoticons start appearing one by one, that you nearly fall over out of your chair when Hyunjin bursts through the door.
“Jesus Christ Hyune, did you have to–”
“What the hell are you doing here?” he asks, breathless. 
“Uh,” you blink, glancing round. “Working?”
“Is Jisung not on a damn plane right now?”
‘I mean he’s on his way to the airport. Chan is–”
“Chan hyung told me that Jisung wanted you to go with him.” Hyunjin says, brow furrowed.
You sigh. “He didn’t want me to go with him. Well, okay, he did. But I told him I can’t just pick up and leave. He knows that. Nana left this place to me and–”
“You are so stupid.” Hyunjin sighs. 
“Excuse me?” you ask. You stand up, crossing your arms as you walk closer to the counter. 
“Come on. We have to go.”
“Go where, Hyunjin? I’m not leaving to–”
He cuts you off, places an envelope on the wooden surface. “And I am not letting you stay here and pretend that this is what you want.”
“What is that?” 
“A plane ticket.” he says, pushing it towards you. “To Seoul.”
Your mouth opens and closes, lost for words. Hyunjin is already moving around the counter, pushing past you with an expression the most serious you’ve ever seen on him.
“Hyunjin I– I can’t– where did you even…?”
“Chan hyung has a friend.” he mumbles as he begins pulling stuff out of the office. Your planning notebook, your apron, the picture of your grandma off the wall. All of it thrown into a small box he managed to snag from somewhere off to the side.
“His name is Seungmin or something. Met him out in the tourist hub. Dude’s super rich with tons of miles and apparently owed Chan for a drunken night where he needed to be escorted to his hotel. So thanks to him, you’re leaving.” he explains as he grabs the box with both hands and starts walking towards the door.
“Wait.” you stop him, watching as he turns to regard you with a look that says his patience is running thin. 
“I told you I can’t leave, Hyunjin. This place is where I need to be.”
He huffs, places the box on the ground in front of him. His hair falls in waves around his face, a shimmery dark brown beneath the rays of the sun poking into the room. 
“Can you be honest with me?” he asks. 
You nod, slowly. 
“Do you love him?”
Hyunjin watches you with careful eyes. Reads you like a book, something he’s always been good at. You don’t doubt that it’s written on your face. Star-kissed cheeks and eyes as bright as marigolds. 
“So much that it hurts, Hyune.”
Hyunjin smiles, eyes watery. “Then you deserve to go. You deserve your chance to be free. Don’t worry about this place, I’ll take care of it.”
The familiar sting of tears sits behind your eyes. Your heart swells full of love for this friend, this light, this beacon of unconditional love in the shape of your best friend.
“I don’t have clothes.” you manage to say around the lump in your throat.
Hyunjin shakes his head, tears spilling down the bridge of his nose. 
“I’ll send them to you.”
“There’s a lot to do around here for just one person. What if you need me?”
“I’ll manage.” 
You round the corner quickly, throwing yourself into his chest. He catches you with ease, wraps his arms around your body as the both of you cry into each other.
“I’ll miss you.” you say weakly.
Hyunjin’s throat bobs against the top of your head. “I’ll always be here in our little corner of the world.”
The two of you stay like that for a while. Hyunjin’s warmth seeps into your skin, lights you ablaze. By the time he pulls away, his hands on your shoulders, you feel like you’re floating. Unreal.
“I don’t have a way to get there.” you say quickly, glancing at the clock. 
Jisung’s plane leaves soon. The airport, the only one on the island, is a thirty minute drive. You’re at a disadvantage the more time you spend not moving. 
“Don’t worry,” Hyunjin chuckles. “I’ve got that taken care of.”
You open your mouth to ask him what he means when you’re cut off by the sound of honking from outside. Confused, you run to the door, your jaw dropping as soon as you realize who’s waiting for you.
“Hurry up people we don’t have all day!” Jeongin calls, his upper body hanging out of the window. He’s parked outside in a beat-up truck, arms waving wildly when he spots you.
“Innie!” you scream, pushing through the door to run at him. He jumps out of the truck just in time for you to barrel into his chest, laughter loud in your ears as he spins you around. 
“You’re here! Oh my god I thought you weren’t coming for another two weeks.” you say in disbelief once he puts you down.
He looks older, more sophisticated. His hair is rusted and falls past his ears, the ends just barely touching his shoulders. 
“Yeah, well,” he shrugs. “I figured I’d show up earlier. You know, see you before you leave, catch up with my parents, help Hyunjin break into your house. The usual.”
“Help Hyunjin break into my what–” you say, but you stop when your eyes fall on the small suitcase in the backseat. Your own bag, the one that’s been sitting in your closet untouched for years now.
“For the last time,” Hyunjin says from behind you, carrying the box in his arms. “It’s not breaking and entering if I have a key. Which, by the way, I told you would come in handy one day.”
He sets the box down next to the luggage and dusts his hands on his pants. When he turns to face you, he’s smiling, eyes disappearing into crescent moons.
With tears threatening to spill once again, you stare at the both of them, your heart bursting at the seams. “I love you guys.”
Jeongin grimaces, opts for getting back in the driver’s seat as you laugh. Hyunjin rolls his eyes and ushers you inside of the truck.
“Yeah, yeah. Save it.” he says. “Right now, you have a plane to catch.”
The airport is crowded. 
There are tons of people everywhere, some saying hello and some saying goodbye. Hyunjin explained the gate system to you before you left him and Jeongin on the curb, and you keep glancing down at your ticket to make sure none of the information has changed in the past thirty seconds since you last looked. 
Thankfully, your gate isn’t far. With twenty minutes to go until boarding, you can feel the sweat building up beneath the hand that’s curled around your suitcase handle. 
It’s scary thinking about the fact that this is it. That you’re finally leaving. 
It’s bittersweet, too. There’s an excitement in the pit of your stomach as well as a feeling of dread in your chest, both of them meeting in the middle somewhere. 
You let your eyes scan the crowd, searching for wavy hair and thick-rimmed glasses. However, the first thing you see is the familiar neck of a guitar, strapped right on to a back that you would know and recognize anywhere without warning.
Jisung is seated near the gate, his eyebrows furrowed and lips set in a pout as he glares down at his phone. You realize that he’s probably wondering why you won’t answer, why all of his emoticons are going ignored. 
Quietly, you come up behind him, reach into your pocket, and say, “Excuse me? I think you dropped this.”
Jisung startles, his eyes falling on to the guitar pick being held out in your hand. Slowly, he lets his gaze follow upwards, wide-eyed and shocked.
“What– what are you doing here?” he asks. 
You place the pick in his hand. “I'm on my way to Seoul. There’s a guy there that I’ve been trying to find for a while.” you say. 
Jisung catches on quickly. “Oh, really?” he asks, moving over so you can sit beside him. “This guy must be pretty great if you’re leaving for the mainland.”
The rain starts hitting the tarmac outside right as you sit down. “Hm, yeah. He is. He really likes the stars. He says that he found a way for me to live in them, too.” 
He laughs, the sound making your stomach flip. “Sounds like you’re excited.”
You nod. “I am. He promised me that we’d do a lot together, experience new things. Apparently he’s gonna write songs and I’m gonna be a nerd.”
Jisung snorts and reaches across to link his hand with yours.
“He’s really lucky.” he says, leaning over to plant a kiss on your lips.
You smile into it. “So am I.” you whisper into his mouth, your heart stuffed to the brim with flower petals. 
And when Jisung smiles back, his other hand coming up to cup your cheek and give you another kiss with the force of a thousand suns, you feel the key you’d been searching for finally click into place. 
Salt of the earth. Soil and stardust. A boy who glows so bright that his girl sprouts blossoms from her fingertips. 
Forever isn’t promised. But then again, with Jisung by your side, there are things you know for certain:
It’s February. The tulips are in bloom. In Jeju– it rains.
And no matter what, despite all odds, you and Jisung will always find your way back to each other in the place where marigolds grow.
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spaceyaceface · 2 days
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hello lovelies <3
I think it’s been pretty obvious, but I haven’t been active the last few months. I had been struggling with my mental health for quite a while, and came to realize being so heavily involved in fandom wasn’t doing any good for me. So I took a big step back to figure things out. Thankfully, I’m doing a lot better now.
I’ve gotten a couple messages asking if I’m planning on coming back or being active in the fandom again—so I thought I’d make a quick post about it. I so appreciate all of you who have thought about me and messaged me, it means more than you know. I’m so grateful for the friends I’ve made in this fandom. I couldn’t love you all more. That being said, I don’t plan on being heavily involved in the fandom any time soon. I really don’t want to regress to where I was and lose the progress I’ve fought hard to make. But I won’t be gone completely—I’ll be popping on every once in a while to reply to messages.
Lately, I’ve been wanting to finish Safety. If I do do that, it’ll be slow so that I can make sure I’m prioritizing the things in life that I need to. But it’s something I’m proud of and would like to see complete. I cant promise anything, but do know it’s on my mind.
I’d just like to reiterate this: thank you. Thank you for being there when I needed you. Thank you for supporting any work I’ve made and thank you for being such a wonderful group of people. I love you all. This community is filled with some of the most creative and passionate people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing, please NEVER stop that.
I’ll be around here and there. Be kind, find happiness, and take care of yourselves. Love you ❤️
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anklebitingbrat · 16 hours
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mdni ! 18+ this is inspired by Pencil Skirt by Pulp :3
It’s Tuesday at 5:48pm, he was over. Fiancé out of town on a work trip made this easier for you both, but the goodbye later on was hard, a lingering “I’ll see you soon, yeah?” would always fall from his lips as he stood in the hall. He would always be back, be back for you.
Anakin wouldn’t let you change from work, pencil skirt still on, blouse unbuttoned but still tucked in, he took his time, relishing in the moment. He would sit back on his knees, looking at you, slowly beginning to move the hemline further up, never breaking eye contact, a sense of teasing, a sense of power over you.
“You still miss me even when you’re with him?” it was hardly a whisper, he wanted to ask if you still loved him. You did.
“We shouldn’t be doing this Ani-” you reply, stating the obvious and dodging his question, but of course you did.
He liked when you said this, when you put up a fight. For the past 22 months whenever you would find each other again, you made a point to say this, to clarify just how wrong this had been.
But Anakin liked that it was wrong. He liked that you knew it was wrong, and still did it.
He has you bent over now, his hands running down your arched back, back up towards your hips, memorizing this feeling, he never knows when it’ll be the last. When you finally marry someone else, when you finally move away.
“Anakin, this isn’t right.”
He doesn’t care, he doesn’t care because that matters in this moment is how wet you are, how you respond to him.
He’s been teasing his tip at your entrance for over a minute, slowly dragging himself back up your slit, collecting your slick on the head of his cock. He always loved how responsive you are to him.
“Anaki-”
He knew you put on this show of regret because he liked it - loved it - he loved when you’d tell him to stop. But he needed you to shut up, finally. As he thrust into you, he felt his conscience disappear.
Picking up his speed, he forced his hips into the back of your thighs, already coated in your arousal made this easy. His hands had a harsh grip on the skin of your hips, leverage to angle into you deeper, to hit you cervix, so when he’s long gone you still feel him. Anakin would always say this was a “parting gift,” “something to remember him by” when your fiancé gets back.
“Shut up, tellin’ me stop but you’re the one who begged me to be here” his voice was seething with anger, every word punctuated by his harsh and unrelenting pace.
He would let one hand go from your hip, slapping the side of your thigh, you were just so pretty all bent over in front of him, especially like this, especially when he could feel you pulsing around his length, a creamy ring forming around the base.
The anger from his comments was never towards you, he could never blame you, god, he still loved you, he still wanted you, but that diamond ring on your finger kept glinting in his eye and he couldn’t help the rage he felt.
“Pretty ring on your finger, baby, too bad he can’t make you cum, that’s why I got you bent over right now, huh?”
“You gonna call me up like this when you got kids”
“You gon’ keep on creaming on me like this forever”
He knew you couldn’t respond. Your inner guilt, but mostly because your face was pushed into the bed, soft moans being pushed out in tandem with his thrusts. But he didn’t like that.
Bending at his abdomen, never letting up on his quick pace, he’d reach around your neck, pulling you up. Your blouse open, your back to his bare chest. His mouth just behind your ear.
“Answer me” he would demand in a growl.
You could hear his pants, you could hear the desperation lacing each labored breath he let go, he wanted this just as much as you did.
But this was too messy, it was too ugly to keep going back to him like this. Your lack of response was irritating him, the hand on your neck moved to your jaw, and he craned your head towards the engagement pictures on your nightstand.
“Look at that picture and tell me we’ll always do this” your head buzzing from a lack of oxygen not even realizing his other hand was between your thighs, rubbing quick circles on your throbbing clit.
A ragged breath came from your mouth, “Yes, Anakin - yes.” You meant it, but it came out in sobs, you hadn’t meant to sound like that.
That was all Anakin had to hear, he pushed your head back down into the mattress, noticing a small tear rolling down the bridge of your nose, he loved you. He loved your body, your face, your hands, you, how wet you got, how you made him forget reality.
He wanted to make you forget about the man who put a ring on your finger. It should’ve been him. But, it wasn’t, so if this is how he got to spend his life with you, he was fine with that.
His hand landed back on your hip, other hand still toying with your throbbing bud. He had moved one of his knees up for a better angle, you’ll feel it more this way, and he wanted to show you a good time. He would die here if he could, he had to let you know.
He was high and drunk on you, he didn’t mean to let it slip, but it did.
“I still love you-”
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back2thebasics · 2 days
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Gojo X Reader - First post!
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MDNI - 18+ - Fem Reader x Satoru Gojo
Gojo x Reader - Bad Reputation
Synopsis: You're tasked with being a publicist for Satoru Gojo. For most the job would be a dream come true but you dread the job because of his recent behavior. Nights out partying till 3 am and leaving with random women. You decide to schedule an in-person meeting to discuss his recent paparazzi pictures and his declining reputation. 
I drew the fanart myself and I will be posting it in a separate post.
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He’s late as always. You watch as he casually strolls into the small restaurant without a care in the world. He wears a pair of black designer sunglasses and a mostly black outfit to match. It's a stark comparison to his icy white hair which is perfectly coiffed. He spots you and smiles wider in that cheeky grin that you have grown accustomed to. His long strides bring him to you in a few steps.
“Wow, look at you today. You're all dolled up. Is there a special occasion?” He teases and pulls out the chair across from you then plops down into it somehow remaining graceful. 
“These are just my professional clothes, also you're late. I've been waiting an hour for you. Where were you?” you ask, hiding most of your impatience.
“Sorry I was busy. I had to drop someone off.” He replies.
“Please tell me you were discreet about it.” You scrunch your brow knowing the answer already.
“Does it matter? You're the one who told me last week that I have a reputation as a womanizer.” Gojo’s piercing blue eyes barely visible beneath his shades. 
“Yeah but if you want that sponsorship to choose you over the other candidate, you're gonna have to clean up your act. They're looking for someone that is marketable to a wide audience not some playboy who is out clubbing every night.” You let your emotions show in your tone a little more. 
This man will make you go gray early with the way you have been juggling his public image. Despite everything you have gone through for his career, you found yourself thinking about him more than you should. 
“Alright whatever you say, darling. I'll tone it down but only on one condition.” Satoru leans forward propping his elbows on the table.
“What do you want?” You ask skeptically.
“Go on a night out with me. Not for work but just for fun. The rules are no thinking of work and if you hate it then you never have to do it again. I'll be good, but only if you let loose for one night. So what do you say?” Gojo quirks his head slightly waiting for your response.
“So just one night and you'll stop all the partying and the hookups? It seems way too easy, what's the catch?” You scrunch your brows not buying a word.
“Catch? There's no catch. I promise. Come on it’ll be fun. Think of it like a work trip, but it's all fun and no business. Sounds like fun right?” He tries to convince you flashing his perfect white teeth in an arrogant smile.
“Fine but no funny business okay, and I'm not leaving after the bar closes. I decide when it's time to go.” You set your terms. 
“Deal.” His smile is blinding.
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A few nights later…
You enter the club with Satoru following behind you. Of course he picked the most popular spot in the city. You have been to clubs before but you prefer the chill atmosphere of a nice bar instead of extremely loud music and sweaty bodies grinding against each other. You dressed up for the vibe of the place. A small tight black dress and heels paired with a full glam. If there are gonna be pictures of you two in the press at least you will look good. It is inevitable but after tonight he has promised to tone it down to make your job easier. All you have to do is get through the night. Should be easy right?
Gojo walks over to the VIP section immediately after the bouncer nods you in and lets you skip the long line outside. I guess being this famous has its perks. You feel a strong hand on the small of your back. You look back to see Gojo smile down at you and nod over to the bar. He leans down to say something in your ear so you can hear him over the music.
“Can I get you a drink, darling?” You feel his breath against your neck and it sends tingles down your spine. You blush and look over to the busy bar where there is another line forming.
“Yeah I guess one drink wouldn't hurt but it looks pretty busy we might have to wait a while.” You reply into his ear which is at a perfect height with him leaning down. He pulls back and smiles with a wink before continuing to lead you further into VIP. 
Hidden away in the back of VIP is a second bar that is way less busy and looks to have all the top shelf liquors. He leads you to a set of two leather armchairs on the left of the bar. He sits down in one of them and then motions for you to sit as well. 
“Shouldn't we go order?” 
Right as the question leaves your mouth a gentleman dressed in an all black suit approaches both of you carrying a tray. He sets down a carafe of ice water and a set of empty glasses.
“What can I get you and the lovely lady tonight Sir?” He questions seeming to know Gojo already. He must be a regular here. 
“I’ll take a whiskey on the rocks.” He motions to you for your order.
“I’ll take a mojito.” You tell the server 
“Perfect, I will be back with those drinks in a minute.” The server goes to the bar and gives the order to the bartender. 
“So are you having fun yet?” Satoru starts the conversation. He sits leaning back in the chair his leg crossed like he owns the place. 
“Yeah, this place is nice.” You lie 
“Be honest with me. I can tell when you lie you have a horrible poker face you know.” He jokes looking around the club to the dance floor where an ocean of bodies grind to the music.
“Okay fine, you want me to be honest. Its too hot in here and I feel a little self conscious. I don't know its stupid. Nevermind.” You try to brush it off
“Self conscious? You look hot right now.” He flirts. 
“Satoru, stop your my boss, it's weird for you to say I'm hot.” Youre caught off guard by the unexpected compliment. Why is your heart racing suddenly?
“What? I can't say the truth? You are looking stunning this evening not that you don't look good everyday.” Gojo remains cool as a cucumber while you look more like a tomato from the harmless flirting. That’s all this is right? The server returns with the tray of drinks and places them down on the table next to the water. He leaves with a polite nod and you pick up your drink gulping it down needing a little buzz. Satoru takes a sip of his whiskey and sets it back down. He looks over at you with a look you've never seen from him before.
“Follow me I know somewhere less crowded.” He stands taking his drink with him. You do the same and don't have time to question anything before he walks towards a set of double doors. Once inside, you see that it's a pool room set up with 2 pool tables and some couches near the back. The room is completely empty and much cooler in temperature than the rest of the club. He grabs a pool cue from the wall and turns to face you with a cheeky smile.
“Have you ever played before?” He asks handing you the cue and grabbing one for himself. 
“No, I've never played. I don't know how.” You reply truthfully. You have no idea how to play and lying won't help you.
“That's okay I can teach you.” He says like it’s no big deal and then he walks over to you and stands behind you. He positions you and instructs you how to shoot but you can't focus with how close he is to you. You feel his strong chest pressing against your back and he gently cradles your arms to show you the proper hand placement. You know your face is probably beet red but you nod along to his explanations trying your best to listen to the rules of the game. 
After playing a couple games and him winning both of them you both sit on the couch to finish your drinks. You've been nursing your drink so you don't feel different from when you walked in.
“For a beginner, you're pretty good. Not everyone can keep up with me so that's a sign of natural talent.” He laughs leaning back into the leather sofa and taking a sip of his Whiskey. He has also been drinking slow which is surprising given his recent history of nights on the town.
“Or a sign that I have a good teacher.” You wink at him letting go a little.
“You're right, it's all about how well you listen to instruction.” His tone takes on a flirtatious tone.
Your eyes meet his, he has ditched his usual sunglasses tonight. His crystal clear eyes search yours like he is reading your thoughts. You hope he can't because it would be very embarrassing for you.
“So do you have a boyfriend?” He asks casually still keeping his eyes on you but they start to roam a little as he looks down at your body. You feel your cheeks heat more and you break eye contact. You try to control the flutters in the pit of your stomach at the inquiry.
“No.” Your answer is simple and softly spoken.
“That's good.” His reply is the same
“Why would that be a good thing?” You ask a little breathless from the way your heart rams into your chest again and again. 
“Because then I don't have any competition.” He smiles at you but his eyes are heated and his gaze still roams over your body.
“Woah wait a minute, I'm not some toy that you can play around with Satoru. If you brought me here to use like one of your hookups, then you've got it all wrong.” You stand up quickly the flutters dying out at the thought of being just another one of his conquests that he will drop off at 5am.
“Is that what you think of me? That I am just some playboy incapable of feeling something for someone without there being sex involved?” He asks quirking a brow. He sounds almost hurt that you see him that way.
“No, but I am your publicist I didn't exactly think you were flirting with me when I asked you to meet up so you could clean up your act.” You grab the wine glass and chug the rest of the red wine. 
“Why do you think I suddenly started acting out and bringing attention to myself when that wasn't an issue before?” Gojo chuckles downing the rest of his drink as well. He looks off pensively.
“What? So you did all that to get my attention. Trust me there are other ways to do that! I dont know a text or email would have done the job.” You pace in front of the couches running your hand through your hair. The last 2 month's worth of stress pushing down on you, the late nights trying to get bad paparazzi pictures off the internet were just the tip of the iceberg. 
“That's lame and so not my style. I must admit the first time was an accident and then when you called me and got all mad at me I just thought it was… I don't know cute.” He watches you pace his eyes following your movement. 
“Cute!? It was not cute, I’ll tell you that. It was stressful and infuriating to see pictures of you drunk with some random girl leaving a club every night. Do you know how hard it is to get paparazzi to delete stuff like that? I had to pay off so many people. Yeah sure it was with your money but still!” You vent not even caring that he is your boss anymore. He put you through this so he gets to sit here and listen to your rant.
“Another thing that got me hooked was seeing you get jealous. Although you might not admit it to me. Every time you would call I could hear it in your voice.” Gojo looks amused but you can tell he is being serious.
“I am not!” The lie leaves your lips and as it does, the realization hits you. You are jealous.
The silence confirms it.
“Fine. Maybe I am a little jealous but what does it matter? I'm still your publicist.” You grumble crossing your arms in defiance.
He stands up towering over you and he walks over to you standing close enough that you need to tilt your head up to look at him. 
“Then I'll just fire you. Simple as that.” Satoru says it like it's the simplest logical answer.
“What? No! You don't have to fire me. Just tell me what you want.” You look up into his ocean eyes searching to see if he is joking, but it is the most serious you've ever seen him. He usually has a laid back nonchalance to him but not right now. His heated gaze and the way he leans into you intently the tension between the two of you is electrifying.
“I am interested in you and I have never been this intrigued by someone before. So if you will agree I would like to see where this goes.” Gojo looks at you with desire and yearning. You can see that he has been thinking about this a lot. 
“Okay fine we can see where this goes but I am going to be honest I don't know where to start.” You look away feeling embarrassed. You don't have a lot of experience and especially not in situations like these. Does he want to go on a proper date or skip all that stuff? 
“Maybe we can start here.” You feel his hand gently grasp your chin as he turns you towards him to look at him once more. He leans in and has to bend down to accommodate for the height difference. Your breath catches in your throat and threatens to leap out of your chest. He gets closer and the instinct to close your eyes takes over as his lips finally meet yours. There are instant sparks and something inside you snaps. Your lips press together and the kiss intensifies as he gently swipes his tongue across your bottom lip. You can't stop the moan that comes from you and he pulls away smirking.
“We can slow it down.” Gojo looks like he is holding himself back. The thought of stopping makes your stomach twist. You want him too.
“No.” The response is rushed and breathless.
Satoru pulls you in for another kiss. This one is more hungry and intense than the last. You let out another soft moan and his hands slide down to cup your ass. The hem of your dress is near the tips of his fingers and if he wanted to, he could pull your dress off in one quick motion. Your heart skips a beat at the thought of that happening. He pulls away again and his face remains inches away from yours.
“Should I lock the door?” he asks his voice low because of the close proximity. 
You simply nod not wanting to fumble over a response and ruin the moment. You have had sex before but something about Satoru Gojo is different. 
He makes you feel shy and flustered. As he turns to go lock the door, you watch him saunter away with his usual walk but a little more rushed. You admire his wispy white locks that you resisted gripping when you were kissing. Your gaze travels down his muscled back towards the narrow hips that make his shoulders look bigger. Then you stare at his butt a little, his tight dress pants make it look so cute and you think about how he would react if you tried to grab it. The thought makes you smile and you don't notice how quickly he has turned around because he catches you staring at his ass.
“Are you enjoying what you see beautiful?” He taunts teasingly as he strides over to you.
“Oh, my god I was definitely not checking you out.” You laugh trying to play off the embarrassment. 
“Oh, you definitely were.” Gojo reaches you and his body backs you into the nearest pool table. He boxes you in and places his strong forearms on either side of you. He leans down and your heart rate picks up
“So where were we?” He asks in a sultry voice,
“I don't know you tell me.” You reply with a slight challenge.
He responds with actions instead of words and he pulls you into another passionate kiss. He slides his large hands down your body and then when he reaches your ass he surprises you by lifting you up and setting you down on the edge of the pool table. It adjusts your height difference and he no longer needs to bend down to reach your lips. Now that you are the same height you lace your arms around his neck and the previous urge to run your fingers through his hair overpowers you. His hair is so soft and fine that it feels like silk and you hear a low rumble coming from Gojo when you gently grip it in between your fingers.
His large hands grip your hips and he pulls you in even closer until you are pressed up against him and you can feel something hard pressing against your lower stomach. You moan into the kiss and slide one hand down from his neck to his crotch once you reach your target your hand lightly rubs over it over his pants and he nips your bottom lip before pulling away. He pulls back far enough so he can look you in the eyes and he looks conflicted.
“If we keep this up. I- “He huffs, cutting himself off and then he continues.
“I don't want you to think this is just about sex.” His tone turns more serious and his eyes search yours to see what you're feeling.
“I didn't mean what I said earlier. You're right, I was jealous when I saw you with those girls but I pushed it away because I thought the feeling was stupid.” You reply telling him the truth.
All those photos you saw and all the times you wished you were the woman in the picture with him. Now that fantasy was coming true.
“You know I never actually hooked up with any of those girls in the photos. I only escorted them home because they were too drunk.” Gojo tells you and from his sincere expression you can tell he isn't lying.
“So you were just being some hero all along making sure women got home safe. Here I was stressing that you were going off the rails.” You can't help but laugh.
“I’m not a hero for doing the right thing, I'm just a responsible owner.” He replies casually.
“Owner? You own this place?” You question shocked. You knew he had a few properties in the city but he didn't mention he owned clubs. 
“Yeah this one and a few others you have probably already seen me leaving. All for work purposes. Did I have a drink or two on the job, of course, but I wasn't there to party like you thought. Was I going to tell you that? Absolutely not. All because of those phone calls I'd get from you the next morning where you’d scold me and use your cute little annoyed voice. I'm sorry it caused you stress, but I didn't know how to get you to talk to me more.” Gojo smiles at you and he looks almost nervous. 
You making him nervous gives you the confidence to say what you're thinking without restraint.
“You know, it’s funny, because I used to fantasize about being one of those girls. I would imagine what it would be like to be with “The Satoru Gojo” and I would think of all the things you would do to me. I always repressed those thoughts thinking I was delusional for thinking about you that way.” You recall the nights you stayed up tossing and turning over your confused feelings for your client. 
Satoru grasps your chin and smiles devilishly at you.
“Is that so? You've been thinking about me. What do I do to you in these fantasies?” He questions you teasingly, and it sends a new wave of heat through your body.
“You see me on a night out and you order me a drink then you kiss me and we fuck in the bathroom of the club or your car.” You tell him exactly what you picture in your mind.
“Well lucky for us being the boss comes with a bit more privacy.” He jokes and leans in again.
You kiss him with need and undo his pants and he gently lifts your ass to pull up your tight black dress. You help him by lifting your ass a little so he can successfully take off your dress. You're left in a black lacy set that you chose to go with the black satin dress. You're happy you decided on a matching set tonight not thinking anyone would see it especially not Gojo. He admires your body and pulls down his pants leaving him in tight black boxers. He unbuttons his shirt his eyes tracing over every single inch of your exposed skin.
You take your turn admiring his body when he finally peels off his shirt to reveal sculpted abs, and a broad muscled chest. You can't help but touch as you place your hands over his warm chest. His beautiful ivory skin, decorated with beauty marks like the finishing touches to an artist's masterpiece. 
“There are no words for a sight like this. You are absolutely breathtaking my darling.” He glides his hands over your thighs which are parted around his hips. He suddenly seems to get an idea and you watch as he lowers himself to kneel in front of you. You still sit on the edge of the pool table so his face is now eye level with your lacy black thong.
“How about I help you relieve some of the stress I caused in the past 2 months. It's the least I can do.” His confident borderline arrogant cadence turns you on even more. 
“Well, I guess you're right. I would like compensation for the gray hairs and the frown lines I will develop soon.” You joke but run your fingers through his hair and he makes a low humming sound in his chest as he slowly pulls your thong down your thighs. He looks you in the eye and you keep your hand gripped in his hair as he reveals your soaking wet pussy. Gojo grips the back of your knees and in one swift moment he scoops you up so your bottom half is dangling off the pool table being supported by his strong grip on your thighs. You let go of his hair and lean back on your elbows on the soft velvet table and watch as he kisses your inner thighs trailing down to your core. You enjoy the sight of it and feel your pussy getting even wetter. He finally reaches your dripping slit and licks a trail from the bottom of your opening to your clit. You gasp and let out a soft moan.
“Mm, you taste so sweet beautiful” He looks up at you with sparkling blue eyes and you grip his hair a little tighter.
He goes back to your core and focuses on your clit sucking it gently and flicking his tongue. Your eyes roll back and your head falls back as you release a breathy moan. He keeps the suction from his lips around your clit and teases a finger at your entrance. He enters it slowly and your hips squirm enjoying the slightly larger size than your own. Your moans grow louder as he begins to curl the finger hitting your g spot just right. He increases the suction and speed and it tips you over the edge. You've never come this fast in your life and your legs begin to shake uncontrollably. You ride the orgasm and he doesn't stop until you're coming down from the second wave. 
“Does that feel better? I love seeing you come for me.” He praises you looking at you with the most satisfied smirk. 
“I want you Satoru.” Your response is breathy and comes out as a plea. Your throbbing pussy aches for him. 
You sit up and he stands up so you can see the thick outline of his large shaft through the tight black fabric of his briefs. You help him pull it down and off and you watch as his large cock springs free of the restrictive material. 
Your mouth almost waters at the sight of it and you make a mental note to return the favor later. He surprises you when he picks you up and you wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him giggling a little when he walks the both of you to the nearest couch where he puts you down. His large body hovers above yours as he lines his tip to your slick entrance. He enters nice and slow and you feel as he fills you inch by inch until his full length is inside you. 
“Fuck, you're so tight baby.” Gojo readjusts himself and then slowly pulls out to push back in. You're not used to someone his size so there is a slight discomfort but it only lasts a few thrusts and then it’s replaced with pleasure. You moan as he picks up the pace slightly and gently squeezes your tit with one hand while the other keeps him from crushing you with his body weight. He leans back and you watch him fuck you slowly. Then he slowly increases pace looking into your eyes. 
“You are so pretty when you’re under me moaning on my cock.” He praises you his heated gaze admiring you. He takes both of your hands and pins them above your head with one hand. You feel a rush of pleasure as your pussy clenches.
“Satoru fuck that's so good.” You moan out.
“Oh you like that beautiful. I felt your tight little pussy grip my cock.” 
“Yes I love it so much.” You reply feeling hazy from the pleasure. Gojo teases your nipple with his thumb and index and the slight twinge of pain when he plucks sends a rush of wetness to your already soaked cunt. He grunts taking on a fast slightly rougher pace. He pumps into you holding onto your legs so he can spread you wide for him. He reaches down with one hand and rubs circles on your clit with his thumb. Your moans get louder and needier as you climb up to the peak of another orgasm. It crashes into you just as strongly as the first one and you see stars as he pounds you through the toe curling climax. Once you're finished, he does not stop. He fucks you hard and fast, pounding into you. You feel yourself building to a third orgasm, Satoru's pace does not slow and his hand returns to your clit. He pushes you to climax once more just as he reaches his own. He pulls out swiftly to cum on your abdomen. You watch as he releases, and the sight is magnificent. Gojo leans forward to kiss your forehead and then he peppers kisses down your face until he reaches your lips where he gives you another deep passionate kiss. He pulls away and quickly walks over to a bar cart in the room containing a few cloth napkins. He grabs a few and returns to you to clean up your stomach. You watch as he cleans you attentively making sure to clean it properly. He helps you put on your underwear and dress before he dresses himself. 
“Now I'm sure you're already aware about the paparazzi waiting for us outside. I will hold your hand the whole time just close your eyes for the bright flashes, and I'll lead you to my car.” He tells you caressing your hair.
“Oh, trust me I came prepared for that. That was also part of my fantasy.” You joke and he laughs and gives you a kiss before leading both of you out through the back where a small crowd of paparazzi stand in the back alley. 
The flashes are blinding but you close your eyes and let the strong hand guide you. You trust him and while he leads you to his car. You remember seeing those pictures of him in this exact spot. Now you're the one leaving the club with him and as the camera flashes surround you, you can't help but smile.
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no-phrogs-in-hats · 2 days
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Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea
Regina Mills x Fem!Reader
A/N: Hey bitchessss here's chapter 3!@#$%^ Don't expect a full come-back. I'm just high asf rn and wanted to write this small chapter for you pookies<33
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Chapter 3: I’m a Troubled Teen (Going Up North to be a Lady-In-Waiting)
Many years ago
The Enchanted Forest
“Your highness, the King and Queen request your presence.”
Oh, God.
It was never good when your parents “requested your presence”. Most of the time it meant you had done something wrong. The last time this had happened, you had jumped off the side of a royal navy ship in your underclothes and satin slippers. 
You shut your book and set it down on the side table in the library, standing up and dragging your feet as you followed one of the advisors. When you approached the door to the “good parlor”, as your mother called it, he knocked three times. You thanked him and after he shut the door a tense air thickened around you.
Your brother, Eric, sat at a chess table with your father while your mother sat by herself in the loveseat practicing her embroidery. 
“What?” you said.
Your mother smiled. “We just wanted to know where you were.”
You looked around awkwardly. “I was in the library…Why did you ask for me?”
“We wanted to spend time with you,” your father said. “It feels like we haven’t seen you in ages!”
“What’s the real reason you asked me here?” you asked.
Still partaking in her embroidery, your mother smiled and looked up at you from the sofa. “We have some news…You remember King Leopold, right?” 
“Sort of.”
“Well,” your mother said, continuing, “his wife, Queen Regina, is looking for a new lady-in-waiting…and they’ve asked for you.”
Your stomach sank. “What?”
“It’ll give you a chance to observe how a kingdom runs,” your father said. “And, it forms an alliance between King Leopold and our kingdom.”
“But–But, Eric is next in line!” you protested. “Shouldn’t he be doing the observing? He’s going to be ruling this kingdom within the next few decades, but instead he’s out on a ship sailing a–”
“Enough!” your father shouted. “This decision is final! The ship sets sail in a fortnight. Queen Regina, King Leopold, and Princess Snow are already expecting your arrival. I won’t hear any more protests from you. It’s time you learn some responsibility and this is the best way to do it.”
__________
Present Day
Storybrooke
You knocked softly on the door to Regina’s home. Waiting a moment, you glanced over to see a sliver of her finger parting the fabric curtain in the front window, just in time to see it quickly close again.
The deadbolt in the door clicked and the door cracked open slowly.
“Hi,” you said quietly.
Regina seemed stand-offish. When the door opened further, you could see it in her eyes that she had been crying.
“Can I come in?” you asked.
She nodded and let you in. You had only been in her home a handful of times–mostly dropping off Henry after school–but it was still as beautiful as you remembered. Instead of admiring the dark hardwoods and the tall ceilings, you focused on her–and now you were admiring much more.
There were still tears in her eyes and wrinkles sat scattered over her navy pantsuit. Everything was becoming so clear in this short amount of time–every dream, every vision, the vague images of your parents in your head. A part of you wanted to yell at her. She took so much from you, but, god, it was hard to be mad at her.
“Um, Regina,” you murmured when she closed the door. “I just wanted to say–”
And there was that feeling–her lips. They encased yours so perfectly. You could feel her strong hands grasp your biceps as you leaned into the kiss. You took a few steps back, bracing yourself against the wall when Regina pulled away. “What?” she huffed. “You wanted to say what?”
You searched her eyes. “Nothing, it can wait for later,” you said, grasping at her shoulders as your lips met again for the first time in 28 years.
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dashnite · 1 year
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Found out today (right now) that my childhood friend had a heart attack in the early morning hours and did not resist. I’m currently on my way to the wake.
He was literally my first crush. He was this blond teen w green eyes and just as awkward as I was so we bonded immediately. He hyperfixated on Sherlock and learned how to play the violin because of him.
My last memory of him is getting wasted in my room and playing the violin for me to sing and doing absolutely terrible. He was a sweet, shy and caring guy and I will feel his loss with all my heart.
I love you, Vinicius. Sorry I wasn’t around in the past few months to remind you of that.
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zainmalik · 4 months
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hobisexually · 1 year
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#y’all I’m exhausted#my cat keeps going on the litter box but not doing anything#and I think she just doesn’t like the stuff in it and the box is too small so I ordered a new one but it will take two days to get here and#I don’t know what to do!!!!!!!#and I keep waking up when I hear she gets on it in the middle of the night in stress checking whether she’s doing something#and she isn’t#and I keep having nightmares of her dying and having to tell her owner she didn’t last a week with me and she never should’ve brought her#last time she went on it was what? Sunday early morning?#its Tuesday it’ll be fine#but you know?????????#I also had to leave her behind for the first time today because I need to go to work#I stretched it by one day by working from home yesterday but yk#im so FRANTIC and I’m so stressed and my supervisor is leaving on holiday for three weeks so I’m in charge of the big stuff suddenly#which I’m not stable enough for atm at all I shouldn’t be in charge of anything in this state of mind#also apparently my dad is hurting a lot over not speaking to me and yeah my man same but ?????? what am I gonna do huh#it took me a WHOLE month to feel normal again after the disaster that was December we can’t keep doing this#I cried in the middle of a fancy restaurant last night#and then as if that wasn’t bad enough had to have a talk with my mum about racism and body image and religious trauma and how she can’t keep#getting in the middle of my dad and me and then it spiralled into a conversation abojt how my dad impacted HER#and how the divorce was hell for her for a reason because the emotional abuse was. hm.#and hearing that! also how much weight she lost then which I always thought was because she was sick but no it was him#very difficult to hear#fuuuuckkkkk meeeeeee y’all#and I can Feel my brain going around in circles like it’s anxiety central and I can’t stop it atm#shit man.#UGH#I HATE THIS SOMEONE KNOCK ME THE FUCK OUT#@ [redacted] go ahead honestly
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lilgynt · 1 year
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OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. i forgot to update about so many life events
#personal#it’s important cause this is how i keep track of MY life#you know how much i’d forget without my tumblr personal tag#ANYWAY.#MY OLD WORK PLACE SHUT DOWN#i found out when filling up information for my new job and i looked up the address and oh my god i could puke that’s so fucking funny#LOVE that the manager who groomed me was like ur made a huge mistake leaving… last time i visited oh my god#i am sad about jimi tho he was my favorite and im still in love with him :( i do know his twitch streaming channel tho#oh and my brother apologized ? kinda?#i guess he could tell i was stand off ish during thanksgiving#and also side note damn i cannot win thanksgiving i bring up my issues there’s drama i don’t do shit there’s drama#anyway he bought me a tank full of gas and was like i understand i can’t buy forgiveness and this isn’t me trying to this is just me saying#i’ve been a dick. it was a longer speech about how he’s ready to put this behind him if i am but he gets if i’m not#i didn’t know how to respond bc it’s like okay are you doing this just to move past the issue or like. do you find anything wrong in ur#actions. and he never answered me on whether he likes me or not#so i was like okay. appreciated and left it at that#he chilled in my room his last day here and we just chatted a little#it still had this odd feeling of like my views of our relationship have permanently changed but he seems exactly the same and i can’t tell#if he felt any change or if i’m just by myself#it does suck that it feels like it’ll never be like before again and it feels like. like that’s my fault#like if i could just be normal and move on we’d be fine but i’m still upset and. gg and audrey emphasize that i’m just not taking his shit#anymore but it still feels like my fault#very funny how kept buying me things tho like 30 buck discount on a car thing smoothie food tank full of gas#that was a little funny.#also super sweet how upset everyone is i’m leaving. i already had to make plans and promises to visit its very sweet at work#but also oh my god i’m so glad i’m leaving i worked a full day black friday and that was fine but post closing i could kill my manager#some dude PUSHED his way through the door and the attendant holding it and her only response was that’s fine#and he was there till fucking 9:21 also i was the only cashier scheduled past closing and no one made an announcement till like. five after#we closed thankfully the other cashiers stayed cause there was a shit ton of people like no shit! but her being like that’s fine set me off#sooooo bad
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bjurnberg · 5 months
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My work boots are the most expensive shoes I’ve ever owned.
Also the most comfortable. I chose them after trying on several different brands and comparing lifespan vs usage vs comfort - I needed them for a physically demanding job, not the weekend hiking trails. I could have easily chosen cheaper boots that would have lasted long enough to be worth their low price, but I know the Sam Vimes Boot Theory and knew weaker, less comfortable boots would make my life harder in the long run.
So when the outside edge of the heel started wearing down after three years of heavy use I went to the shop I got them from and said “hey this is a common problem for me with how I walk but now it’s affecting my ankles and knees and I don’t wanna have to buy a new pair, is there a way to fix this?”
The salesman at this very fancy upscale boot store said “oh yeah, there’s a shoe repair place that can give you some heel guards - it’ll keep the rubber from wearing out.”
So at 8am this morning right after my 9hr shift ends I went to the shoe repair shop and it is the most hole-in-the-wall, is-this-a-real-business-or-a-mafia-front, am-I-gonna-get-shot tiny cinder block cube I’ve ever seen in my life. I grew up plenty poor and love me a good hole-in-the-wall business, but going from upscale store to this cash-only repair shop gave me whiplash. Wasn’t expecting this when a guy who wears three piece suits to sell boots said it’s the best place to go.
The skinny kid behind the counter looks somehow 16 and 25 at the same time, but when I tell him this place was recommended he smiles and says to hand over my boots. I hand him the vaguely warm foot-smelling boots, and stand in my socks in the 3’ square entryway surrounded by every color leather polish you could buy and watch as he turns my boots around in his hands, sizes up a crescent moon bits of plastic, and unceremoniously hammers tiny nails through them before handing them back.
The heels are perfectly level again. I can walk without almost rolling my ankles. They don’t clack loudly on the pavement or feel different. This is gonna fix my knee pain. It cost $10.
This kid had every tool he needed within arms reach, worked fast and smoothly, I was in and out the door in less than 8 minutes, and it only cost $10.
I didn’t think anything could cost only $10 anymore. I’m so used to hyperinflation prices I was spiritually thrown back to the 1400’s visiting the cobbler in town square. This kid might have been that cobbler and just decided to never die.
I’m still reeling from the whiplash, and gobsmacked at the price, and thrilled I didn’t have to go buy new, worse work boots (cuz I don’t have that kind of money for a second pair, I’m expecting these ones to last a decade) and it feels like I just experienced one of the rare little chunks of magic that floats around our world.
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gorejo · 5 months
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▸ ▸ the longer you keep it up, the harder you’re getting fucked :p - gojo satoru
synopsis: you make a bet, but your boyfriend is the one that needs to fulfill it. catch is, if he succeeds then you'll get half a grand, but if he can manage till his birthday, then you'll get even more. and before he settles on the bet, Satoru warns you with one promise he knows he will fulfill. because the longer the bet goes on, the harder you'll be getting fucked when he succeeds.
content: 11k words (what in the world). afab!/fem!reader, she/her pronouns. minors do not interact. half of gojo's pov mixed with yours, reader calls him baby girl, explicit smut — fingering, cunnilingus, creampie, squirting, unprotected sex but only because reader allows and satoru asks for permission, pet names (sweets, princess, babe), explicit language. Satoru gets morning wood and an erection during his meeting. Megumi and Tsumiki almost catch him in the kitchen, Satoru imagines reader in a dress, mentions of masturbation, satoru has a private album of photos/videos, soft!dom satoru, he cums multiple times — inside and on readers breasts.
happy birthday to my lover boy!!!! 🎉 (i posted this on his actual bday, but it got booted from the tags.... )
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Satoru felt his vein pop. 
He should’ve known by the way you approached him, called out his name with an unusually cuter ring to his name — the one that left him usually helpless in your palm — to hear it, he’ll sacrifice the world. He should’ve known something was up your sleeves, when you pulled at the bottom of his shirt, playing with the hem as you looked up through your lashes.
Normally, he’ll never reject your advances nor your desires, especially when you were being this cute, but for this? 
Sometimes he needs to put his foot down — because you must be out of your mind.
How cruel of you to even ask him. Were the eight years of not being able to fuck each other not enough for you, that you just dared to ask him? 
“Absolutely not.” his voice was curt, short of the usual chime whenever he responded to you.
“Why? It’ll make it that much more exciting when December comes around, ‘Toru.” you hugged him tighter, looking up at him in hopes that it’ll get him to give in — it always worked. 
He had too, especially when almost half a grand was on the line. 
“It’ll perfectly align you know? since it’ll be your birthday then, as well…” you seduced while riding on your toes to have him look at you. 
“Do you want me to die?” Satoru cupped your face as he looked straight into your eyes, his large palms pushing your cheeks together, “and we’ve tried it, and guess what happened then?” 
“Well no…” your voice muffled through pouted lips, “b-but it’ll be different now! You’re older!” your grip loosened around his shirt, disappointed that he wouldn’t give in.
“If you know, then absolutely not,” he scoffed while letting go of your cheeks, his hands immediately finding your waists, pulling you closer to him, utterly offended you would even dare to pull back from him.
“and no it’s not. I failed then, I’ll fail again now. I’ll probably fail even worse than last time.”
“It’ll be so quick, the month will honestly fly by!” you quickly retorted, leaning your body onto his. 
“So you’re a liar now,” he crooked a brow, looking down at you with his jaws clenched from trying to stand his ground. Knowing he didn’t have the guts to really tell you no, especially when you looked so determined to succeed over something that had no means of any health benefits but potentially drive one insane — the experimental group? him — eight years prior when he tried the challenge.
conclusion: no nut november was unapplicable to one named Gojo Satoru.
Groaning into the crook of your neck, his breath gently ticking your skin, “I wanna be inside you all the time.” your boyfriend tended to always such perverse and ludicrous words with ease.
“D-don’t you think you’ll be so proud of yourself? We can do pilates or meditate together instead —” your voice stuttered from the sudden mesh of his lips on your skin and the gentle breeze of his breath coating your neck. 
Annoyed that you were continuing with this, Satoru lightly nibbled on your skin, smirking when he felt you jolt in his arms, “I’m perfectly content with who I am now, princess. How much more perfect can I get?” he peppered kisses up your jaws and softly kissed the edge of your lips. 
“... we can meditate together, become one soul and mind, through the art of sex. It’s good for you. You know like my cock inside you? How harmonic, how wonderful, how … much more rewarding can that get? Maybe we can finally try some new positions? Like those Kamasutra positions, Suguru sent me. He said that shit works. ”
“But ‘Toru —” you whined, the once animated chirp of your voice dissipated to nothing but disappointment and sadness at your boyfriend’s refusal to comply.
“Why are you pressing this so much?” Satoru furrowed his brows, absolutely confused as to why you would willingly be abstinent for not just one day, nor even a week, but for a goddamn month and a couple of days on top of it? 
“B-because…” you lightly bit onto your lips, hesitant to spill the truth. 
— flashback to a week prior.
“Say… have you and Satoru ever tried… you know… being abstinent for a bit?” she asked while twirling her straw around the rim of her glass cup. 
“Well,” sighing while resting your cheek on the palm of your hand, your body leaning onto the coffee table, “we did try once in college,” humming with a light gleam to your voice, “but he failed within that week.”
“I see…”
“What’s up?” You kindly smiled, questioning her motive of asking, “are you and Suguru okay?”
“Yea, we’re fine! A little too good, I would say,” she laughed, a light glimmer of her eyes sparkling just where the sun radiating above you both, shining down warmth to excite you for the words she was just about to say, “just wanted to fuck with him, a bit you know?”
“How so?” intrigued with her sudden confession, biting your lips in thoughts of maybe – just maybe – you felt the same. 
“November is falling soon, wanted to do the classic no nut challenge,” she shrugged before crossing her arms with her elbows resting on the table, “ wanted to see how far he could last…” rolling her eyes with a sigh, “he’s always so… so full of leisure. always teasing me when I know his nuts are about to bust.”
Giggling in response, “Well, if this makes you feel better, I have to get Satoru off me, or else he’ll cry.” Shaking your head, “you know, for being so similar to one another, they are weirdly so different.”
“Hey… do wanna make a bet?” her eyes gleamed, and her face contorted in excitement as she anticipatingly nibbled her lips.
“A bet?” 
——
“... I made a bet,” you mumbled while playing with your toes, you couldn’t help but wince at the scoff your boyfriend gave you.
“A bet? Like money? Didn’t know you had a gambling addiction.”
“Satoru, I’m being serious.”
“I am too,” clicking his tongue against his teeth while running his hand over this hair, “So you’re telling me you made a bet… and that has to do with Suguru and his girl because…?
���Well… it was to see who would last the longest,” nervously pursing your lips as you watched his vexed expression.
“...Are you serious?” your boyfriend deadpanned.
“Mhm…” you nodded, “very serious.”
“How much?”
“Five…”
“Five dollars, youre joking —” 
“Five hundred for the winner and an extra two hundred if you can last till your birthday…”
“And why is there an extra incentive for me?”
“Because… she didn’t think you’d be able to survive even a week, nor did Suguru when she texted him. Both thought it would be an easy win.”
"that dickhead," deeply sighing with his eyes firmly closed, “did you at least bet that I’ll win?” His fingers wrapped behind your back as he tiredly looked back at you.
“Of course!” you smiled, giggling while snaking your arms around his neck, “I know my boyfriend will win.” 
“you're lucky that you're cute,” Satoru crinkled his nose with a smile, “but, do you genuinely want to do this?”
“Mhm, Imma treat my baby girl out,” reciprocating the crinkle while lightly pinching his cheeks, giving him the softest smile as he slowly loses his resolve. 
“your baby girl, you say?” Satoru raised a brow while running his fingers against the plush of your lips.
“My own and only,” giggling while lightly prancing on your toes. 
Slowly releasing a deep breath before clicking his tongue against his teeth, Satoru accepted your proposal. “Don’t get mad at me when I push you off for being needy,” your boyfriend smirked while pinching your cheeks, “and no more special good morning wake-up calls, even if you beg, I won't give it to —"
Heat immediately radiating to your face, your heart thumping increasingly at the remembrance of Satoru’s cheeky morning relief — in between your thighs, lips kissing your inner skin as he trekked his way to your cunt that looked just so pretty for him.
“I’m the one that always pushes you off, stupid…” you softly murmured, “but yes! I just want us to succeed at least once, and plus… don’t you want to beat Suguru?”
“He’s the least of my worries, princess. Because I’m going to make you regret ever making this bet,” he softly threatened, his smile masked with a hint of depravity in his voice.
“Because the longer I hold on,” giving you a wink as he pushed you towards his room, “the harder you’re getting fucked when I win, angel.”
“W-why are we going to —” your lips were pressed upon his, your voice melting into the dichotomy of urgency but also ease as you drowned in his touch, “ ‘Toru!” moaning his name, chest huffing as you clung onto with your fingers raking his hair as your bodies dropped to the bed, “we s-still have to run errands.”
“Fuck those,” Satoru groaned into your neck, caving his face into the crevice as he pulled down his sweats, the bulge of his cock nodding in his briefs. Kneeling on the edge of his bed, his fingers fastidiously pulled your shorts off, throwing them onto the floor, urgently pulling your cute panties off to the side. Exposing your hardened bud as he placed a tender kiss on your clit, now wet with your juice,
“Your silly bet doesn’t start till tomorrow, so open up, gonna make full use of what’s mine.”
— Day one.
The morning felt oddly nice, a little too nice when the mornings were usually cold and dull. The winter breeze was just right as the leaves swayed by its lead, and Satoru was sleeping soundly following the rhythm of the wind gently blowing outside, with his limbs intertwined with his lover. Without a worry, as he slept with his breath steady, and chest rising and falling in a calm motion, from outside looking in, the view would've simply been a couple soundly sleeping during the early mornings. 
But underneath the sheets as both slept peacefully was his cock rudely poking at your inner thigh, his length pressing deeper in as he shifted in his slumber, lips murmuring what he was dreaming. 
Usually, it would be routine. Satoru would wake up first, reach over to bring you close as he wrapped his arms around your body, and then he’d take some time to admire you while you peacefully slept in his arms. Ten minutes thereafter, is when the suffocating discomfort of his dick became too unbearable, and the throbbing of his cock would prod him to anticipatingly lick his lips while making his way down the sheets. With his lips pecking small kisses down your body while his hands gently massage your curves, he’ll quickly station himself in between your legs, softly pushing your cotton panties to the side with his index finger. 
Hearing you shuffle and innocently moan out in your sleep, he’ll tenderly comfort you with a slight gruff to his morning voice, “shh baby, just sleep… it’ll feel good.” With his vacant finger spreading out your folds, the sticky sounds of your cunt slowly became more viscous the more he played with your pretty clit, the bud hardening with each stroke of his finger in and out of your pulsing hole.
His goal wasn’t to wake you, but for him to taste you just enough so that you’ll wake up in bliss, totally unaware of your boyfriend’s servicing actions. And just before he’ll dive more aggressively to taste your cunt, Satoru always placed a sweet kiss at the base of your pussy before caging your thighs around his arms, softly blowing on your exposed womanhood as he felt you stir in sleep. His voice was soothing as he eagerly licked his lips with a smirk, he cooed, “no need for preworkout if I can eat this every morning.”
But today, despite the morning feeling too nice, Satoru woke up frustrated to the core. He did his usual cuddling session with you in his arms — guess that made him feel better seeing you twitch your nose and softly snore. Cute he thought, would be nice if he could eat — 
Instead of anticipation, his cock painfully ached and his mood turned sour the moment he felt the usual nodding of his dick to have some action. 
Usually, he was excited to start the day. Not because he was enthusiastic to go to work, slave his life away to his family corporation, attend those god-awful meetings, and sign the mountains of files that his secretary ordered to finish. 
No, he woke up solely with the intent of eating you out — end of story, final discussion. If sleeping was the only avenue for him to enjoy having a taste of your morning cunt, he’ll go through mountains and sign those papers if he had to — hell, he’ll even stay overtime if he was guaranteed.
But, he couldn’t. At least for a month, he wouldn’t be able to. 
Sex the day before was good — too good. With a balance of carnal urgency as he bullied your abused cunt with his aching length, meshing with some time to wind down in pillow talk or while he sovereigns every ounce of your body with his lips, only to repeat the cycle of fucking like rabbits with the sheets damp and body sore from prolonged sexual intercourse. sex was still so fucking good. 
But today? Yea...
“Fuckkk,” Satoru groaned, throwing his head back onto the pillow with his arm thrown over his eyes, his hips mindlessly moving upward in a pensive desire to fuck you. 
“ ‘Toru?” your voice softly croaked, totally unaware of the frustration your little bet caused him, “you okay?”
“Mhm,” he immediately swallowed you with his arms, his lips pressing delicate kisses on your naked shoulders but keeping a mental note to not have his dick too close to your ass — that was dangerous territory.
“Are you leaving soon? Stay a little longer, I’m cold,” your voice was slurred, while your consciousness slowly slipped into another stage of sleep.
“I can’t sweets,” Satoru grumbled, his hands mounding your innocent breasts, “not when I’m like this,” his breath tickled the edge of your lobes, just fanning against your jaw while the control of his hips was no longer in his jurisdiction but of a mind of their own as he dry fucked your ass, “fuck baby… Are you sure you wanna do this? 
“You p-promised, ‘Toru…” you responded with your back snuggled close to his bare chest, the heat of his body making you feel safe despite the raging thoughts that were blaring in your boyfriend’s mind. 
Getting out of bed was hard, but getting himself to work out despite his cock stubbornly staying tortuously erect was even harder. The moment he pulled himself out of the sheets, he knew today’s workout wouldn’t be of his fancy as he drank his preworkout making his way down to his basement gym. 
And yes, sure as hell, today’s morning workout was a bust. 
— Day two. 
“They say starting is always the hardest, ‘Toru,” your voice, innocent yet ignorant of the turmoil he was going through, was soothing as you brushed your fingers through his hair, his face plastered on your breasts as he contemplated the existence of his life, “why don’t you join me for some pilates? A lot of couples come together!” 
No, it’s not. And whoever came up with such a quote was a complete fuck, because Satoru could rebuttal it to his grave.
First, starting wasn't always the hardest. Getting over your nerves, or mustering up the courage to start wasn't difficult. Maybe it’ll apply to life circumstances like applying for that dream job or starting out a new hobby. But for Satoru, once you’re hooked, absolutely addicted to something, that’s when it’s the hardest. 
Because like a dog conditioned to expect food after a stimulus, the same applies to sex. If he sees you blatantly walking around in those shorts that he just loved to watch you prance around the house in, he'll easily break. Where your cheeks just lightly land outside the rim of the fabric – it was adorable when you reached up the cupboard, exposing a hint of your belly and your ass jiggling when you jumped on your tippy toes. Like a starved animal, his cock would answer with its length pooled with blood, his stomach knotting in flames while his azul eyes dilated at the sight of you.
It was so easy — you made it so easy. Pushing you onto the countertop, getting you when least expected as he smashed his lips with yours while muffling your little yelp — your call of surprise but his invitation for more — was so, so easy. It was exciting, thrilling, utterly fulfilling his primal desires to just swallow you entirely as you clung onto him while crying out his name, your nails scratching against his back while his cock pistoled itself into you, nestling deep inside as he pumped out his seeds, shooting straight to your womb. 
It was glorious, so divine when he felt his cum leak outside you. The warm clumps of his ejaculation thudded against the kitchen floor while he huffed out deep breaths with his head resting on your shoulder. It sent shivers down his back when you embraced him in his arms. And when he was lucky, you’ll look at him with desperate eyes, pulling more out from him as you whisper in his ears, a voice that almost strips all air from his burning lungs as you palm his length and swirl your thumb over his leaking head,
“I think you’ve got a little more in you, right ‘Toru?” 
But instead, currently, with his head leaning against the shower wall, Satoru stood under the cold shower trying to cool off his cock. It’s almost laughable how his dick nods up and down as if it mocked his misery.
“You think it’s funny bastard,” Satoru groaned, voice spiteful that even his own body seemed to have betrayed him. 
— Day three.
Kissing shouldn’t hurt. Right?
He was at least allowed to do that, right?
Maybe not when the kids were around. But an innocent kiss to show just how much he loved you, should be good, right?
Or so, that’s what Satoru’s sex-deprived head concluded when he saw you cleaning the dishes, softly humming an unrecognizable tune.
“I was going to do this, baby…” he lowly groaned into your skin while his hands snaked up your shirt, fingers immediately going to unclasp your bra while his lips trailed up your neck, his hand placed around it for eventual better access to your lips. 
Oh how he wished to press you down onto the counter, push your cute little skirt up your waists while he measured the length of his cock to see how far he could fit himself inside you before ramming himself in — how admirable would it be to hear the synchronized moans coming out from you both simultaneously.  
But he couldn’t. Even if he didn’t agree to this stupid bet, he wouldn’t — no, you wouldn’t allow it, not even dare let him touch you when the kids were around.
Huh? But to his surprise, he could feel you reciprocating back by pushing your ass onto his cock. Soaking in every touch and affection he gave you; just maybe he wasn’t the only one craving, barely surviving through this absurd bet, despite only being the third day.
It was three days too long.
Treating him out? Fuck, that was his job, not yours — well, occasionally he did allow you to buy him some ice cream, but even in that, too, he would rather buy it for you. 
“You know we don’t have to continue —” he tempted, softly whispering into your ear, his bulge pressing against the valley of your ass — erection hard enough for you to feel over your clothes.
“But the bet,” you whimpered when his slender finger pinched your nipples, “it’s o-only been a full two days though,” your voice radiated barely of a whisper.
“Shhh, let's fuck the bet,” Satoru’s hand inched its way down your tummy, gliding to satisfy the aroused coil blooming in between your legs, “this is all so silly, princess. We can be fucking like normal? Enjoying each other, come on, let me make you feel good, yea?” your boyfriend’s voice was laced with an amorous note.
“M-maybe we could just call it qu —” 
“What are you doing?” Megumi blankly asked, holding his finished plate of food while standing in the middle of the kitchen, staring at you both with unimpressed eyes, “are you trying to eat her or suffocate her?"
“Ooo Gojo-kun’s in loveeeeee,” Tsumiki chirped, “that’s what Papa does when he’s with his girlfriend!”
“Fuck, we’re never having kids.”
— Day 12.
“So, you still on that bet?” swirling the fizzling drink, Satoru asked before taking a sip of his sugary mocktail — a drink he confidently orders despite the odd stares he gets from the bartender. 
“The bet about not fucking?” Suguru sounded nonchalant about it. It was exactly twelve days since starting and why the hell does he look so smug about it? Fucking bastard… always so full of leisure when he was crawling, begging for scraps to simply survive.
“Yea, I guess,” the raven hair smirked, his tone taunting as he questioned Satoru, “surprised you’re even taking it this far, thought you would fail after the first hour with your horny ass.”
“What’s up with you and your girl both thinking that fucking is all I think about,” Satoru rolled his eyes, pursing his lips offended.
Suguru simply just stared back, the look of his eyes alone sending Satoru a million words as to why he knows fucking is all he thinks about. 
“Rude, it’s not always…”
Shrugging, Suguru brushed it off, “Sure, whatever you say.” 
“Okay… maybe like 90 percent of the time, no — 80 percent.”
“what an addict, I feel sorry for your girl, gotta tell her to run away when she can,” Suguru teased, pulling out his phone to text you, “like, how do you even concentrate at work?”
“It’s called multi-tasking, a trait only the elite have. clearly, its something you wouldn't know about."
“You know what Satoru?”
“What?”
“it still shocks me how so many entrust their careers with you, slaving their lives away to corporate for an elitely dumbass of a boss,” looking at his bestfriend with the kindest smile while tapping his shoulder, “don’t you think?”
There was no fucking way, he was going to lose to this prick of a best friend. 
— Day 14.
Satoru wondered how he ever survived without you. Call it sentimental, call it deprivation, but one thing for sure was that he wanted you — and it very badly. 
Shaking his leg, annoyingly biting onto the edge of his pen, it frustrated him that there was nothing else that could fathom to take space in his brain besides you. He exercised a hell lot more than his usual regimen and cut off on caffeine so that he could try and knock out when he got off from work.
He even tried doing those meditative breathing techniques that he searched for on the web. Said it was to calm your mind and soul. But god fucking dammit, being in silence made him even more hyperaware of his circumstance.
He can tell you are struggling, as well. He’s felt your touch linger on his body longer, trailing down to areas that you shouldn’t be trying to touch as your voice entranced him out of his free will. 
As much as he wanted to throw in the white flag, and dump this shitty little bet over, he was two weeks in. Despite the last two weeks being an absolute shit show, it gave him an incentive to keep going. Why? Because one, you wanted it; second, because he could prove Suguru wrong that sex is, in fact, not the only thing he thinks about.
Gojo-san, hopefully everyth…
But my god, was waking up in the morning a struggle. It’s almost as if he’s forgotten the taste of your cum coating his lips, droplets dripping down his chin on days when he ate you out a little too hard. The pure ecstasy of being in your arms while your pussy fucked him dry.
The painful yet glorious tug of his hair when you screamed out, “‘Toru right there! D-don’t stop! Ngh fuck harder! Go harder!”
Reciprocating your needs, he’ll burrow his face into the crook of your neck, the weight of his body pressing your thighs down to your chest as he caved his member fully into you, the weight of his balls slamming against your puffy folds while your nails painted red along his back, “f-fucking shit… c-can I, princess? can I cum inside?”
Gojo-san? 
Despite the years, Satoru always asked for permission. He would rather live dickless than know he spilled his seeds without consent. 
Your hot breath stingy his ears covered in sweat, you mewled out, “Yes! Yes! ‘Toru hurry —” 
Gojo-san… are you okay? 
“What?” quickly waking from his daydream, his pen still in his mouth as a table of his subordinates worriedly looked at him with eyes all rounded from shock. 
The infamous Gojo Satoru, the heir to Japan’s richest conglomerate, who has a keen eye for detail and business strategies looked like a deer in headlights in front of his staff. 
“They’re waiting for your executive decision, sir,” Ijichi whispered, covering his mouth with a file, “you seem awfully pale, sir. Is everything alright?”
“I’m sorry,” Gojo cleared his throat, closing the folder as he prepared himself to make his way out, “ l-let me just read through the presentation once more, and I’ll relay my decision later. Good work everyone.” 
Satoru was never one to get annoyed easily. Frustrated? Yes. Even the clicking of his dress shoes tapping against the graphite floor, a sound that he’d never noticed during his career at this office, irked the hell out of him. Hell, even the obnoxious chime of the elevator ticked him off. 
“S-should I clear out your schedule, Gojo-san?” Ijichi broke the ice while he followed behind his boss.
“No need,” Satoru’s answer was curt.
“B-but sir, you don’t seem to look —”
Raising his voice, “Don’t make me repeat myself, Ijichi —” only to catch himself with a deep sigh as he brushed his styled hair back, large palms gripping the edge of his table as he leaned forward, “sorry… didn’t mean to sound harsh, guess i’m just a little tired, that’s all.”
“My apologies sir, I’ll organize your schedule accordingly.” Ijichi stated before taking a bow and making his leave. 
“That’ll be nice, thanks.”
Sitting down on his chair, throwing his head back while closing his eyes, Satoru frustratingly moaned out with his thighs spread out, “I must be going crazy, I’m not some horndog teenager…”
But inside his pants was a bulge, a boner that hadn’t gone down ever since the start of his meeting.  
— Day 17
“Fuck,” a lowly growl resonated throughout the room — desperate and sinful — the depth of his chest expanding with each staggered breath that he took. Clenching onto his bed sheets and shoving the wad of saliva down his throat, it burned from the tension of lubricating his dry throat. 
Licking his lips, and furrowing his brows, Satoru pulled down his sweats, freeing his restrained manhood. When the tip of his head smacked against his lower abdomen, the pain of the cold air encapsulated his poor cock that lay barren on its own, Satoru’s hiss littered his skin with goosebumps when his groans soon turned into desperate whimpers while he vulnerably lay in bed with an erection. 
Before all this, it was easy for him to release. Simply envisioning you while he fucked you senseless, or looked through his private album of photos and videos he’s taken of you. It wasn’t a common occurrence for him to fuck his fist, but hey, when push comes to shove, Satoru wasn’t one to deny masturbating — especially, if he could cum to you in mind. 
Normally, he’ll rest his back against the backboard, topless and with gray sweats — that you'll argue was your favorite because it accentuates his cock and makes him look sexy. If his girl likes it, why not flaunt what he has?
Getting himself in the mood didn’t require much. When he felt his cock pooling with blood, constrained in the restraints of his brief, Satoru would pull down his sweat with a grunt while his member sprung forth. 
Sweetly palming his length, and applying just the right pressure, he’ll start by going through past photos and eventually ending up with videos. Zooming into your sweet lips, hearing your whimpers while he fucked you from behind, watching you play with his fingers on a date, to seeing your breasts giggle with every force of his cock slamming inside you — he loved it all.
Stroking his cock, while bucking his hips forward, desperately moaning while he envisioned just how adorable you would look trying to palm his member. A grip so easy for him to hold with one hand, while you struggled even with two. How soft your tongue would feel around the edge of his leaking head, while your hands carefully fondled his balls, lightly pulling on the sac as you fisted his length, looking up at him through the whisps of your lashes. 
It drove him senseless when you would call his name with a little purr, pulling him closer to you as you spread out your legs to invite him in. It drove him mad when he’ll feverishly press his lips on yours, stifling your cries as he pounded into you. The only sounds resonating from the room were erotic slaps of sweaty skin and your muffled cries.
It didn’t take long for him to cum. give and take fifteen to twenty, but it was nonetheless a euphoric expression because every session made him pulse and huff, desperately desiring more. 
If you had asked to abstain from sex, maybe that would've been easier to manage. At least he could relieve himself solo. 
But, completely stripping himself of the option to simply cum was cruelty on its own.
And no different from a prepubescent boy, Satoru lay in his bed with his cock raging with his tip a fiery red. 
But unlike a teenager, that would get boners out of simply nothing, Satoru couldn’t relieve himself of it.
— Day 19.
Surprisingly, Satoru woke up feeling refreshed. He swore he slept agitated and exhausted especially since this past week you’ve told him, “no more sleeping in one bed together, Satoru.”
But this morning, he felt rejuvenated and light. Maybe not nutting did actually work —
… Did he? No, fucking way. 
Quickly shredding off the sheets, his eyes barely adjusting to the brightness of the room, Satoru checked his groin and examined his hands for any signs that he might've masturbated in his sleep. 
Nothing — spotless. Miraculously, he didn’t even wake up with morning wood. 
With another thought springing to his head, Satoru fastidiously reached for his phone — face id unable to recognize his morning face with the white bird’s nest of hair he had on his head.
Google search history: 
Can my dick break from not cumming?
What are the symptoms of a broken dick?
Reading that there was no correlation between not nutting and its health benefits, and receiving the assurance that one’s dick cannot simply “break” from not cumming, Satoru felt reassured that he, in fact, did not have a broken dick and that maybe he was finally getting the hang of it. 
Surely, there’s always a light at the end of every tunnel.
And maybe he’s finally found his. 
— Day 19 - 11:34 pm
Nope.
Wrong. So so wrong. Most utterly wrong.
Satoru was in fact very wrong of the presumption he had in the morning. Because he was not getting the hang of it. Especially not when his cock was bulging in his sweats, while he was frustratingly lying wide awake during the crack of dawn.
If he could just touch his dick, stroke its length with the perfect pressure, he knew he’ll fold. 
Only if he could. 
It was arguable that he could. 
But the look of disappointment you’ll give him, with the cute pout to your lips when he tells you he’s failed, he would rather die than come to you as a lousy prick that just wanted his dick sucked. 
So, sighing while trudging off his bed, guess it was time for another cold shower — fourth one of the week.
— Day 24.
“Sir, it seems to me that’s you’ve lost some weight.” 
“I’ve been hitting the gym more lately,” Satoru chuckled, the veins of his forearms angrily bulging, clearly visible on his pale skin. 
“There’s been talks…” Ijichi stumbled on his words, unsure how to bring it about to Satoru.
“Talks about?” Satoru questioned, barely taking the time to look at his secretary as he was focused on signing his documents.
“That maybe you’ve broken up with…" Ijichi couldn't even dare say your name in the same sentence, " or —” 
“Yea?” Satoru put his file down, a smirk growing on his face as he twirled his pen around his slender fingers — guess those flirty good mornings and looks from his staff made sense.
“I’m no expert…” clearing his throat, hoping he wouldn’t offend his boss, “but I’m here to listen if you have any trouble with your relationship.”
“I’m glad I’ve got such a trusted advisor,” the man pushed back on his seat, resting his arms on the sides of his chair, “but don’t mind me, just haven’t been able to let off some steam, that’s all.” 
“Okay…”
“And breaking up? Ijichi you’ve been there when she broke up with me.” The man hummed, reminiscent of the days when he was heartbroken and lifeless, “We’re fine… just trying out something new, I guess.”
— Day 29.
It’s been a little over two weeks of sleeping separately. Dates have been cut to sole dinners, and going over to each other’s places was prohibited — at least til the bet, as per his lovely girlfriend. 
And weekends were the hardest for Satoru. 
Typically before this all occurred, weekends were his golden days. He was able to do whatever he wanted when he wanted it with you. Whether it be going on a shopping spree, or taking you out of the country for a short getaway, you were always involved — his common denominator. 
Surely, he was able to still enjoy those with you, but it was rather difficult for him to keep his hands off you. 
He still doesn’t quite understand why committed to this stupid bet in the first place. It wasn’t something he placed for himself, but guess… guess he just wanted to prove to not only you but also himself that sex, carnal lust, wasn’t the only thing that kept him in this relationship. That even though he’s been waking up with blue balls, and his mind driving him insane, you were worth more than that — not that you would ever get disappointed with him for failing, in the first place, but still. 
If he’s made it till now, he can survive till the end. 
But times like these... damn it was fucking hard.
“You want to come in?” you softly asked, playing with his fingers that were rested on your thighs throughout the drive home. 
“You tempting me?” Satoru glanced over at you, cheekily smiling as he pulled towards you to place a tender kiss on your lips.
His lips felt mildly chapped, unusual when normally they were soft and slightly glossy. The warmth of his mouth and the gentle strokes of his thumb rubbing against your jaw eased you into the kiss as he pulled you over to the driver’s side to saddle his lap.
But that was the extent to where his hands would be: cupping your face.
With his car parked on the streets of your apartment complex, and his windows tinted, it wasn’t an unusual rendezvous for him to shamelessly fuck you in it. And that’s what you presumed this make-out session would slowly turn into. 
Because fuck it. You’ve missed him. 
Missed the way he touched you.
Missed the way he held you in his arms.
Missed the way he just knew the parts of your body that made you squirm, right before pinning you in place with his strength. 
Missed the teases and affirmations he gave when he prepped you.
And my fucking god did you miss the way he rammed his cock into you, pistoling his cock inside as he held you down with his weight. Having him cum inside you? That was a bonus. 
“Satoru… let’s go inside,” you moaned out in the split second your lips disconnected, only for him to crash his mouth onto yours once more with a deep groan. 
Before he wouldn’t hesitate to strip you off your clothes, many times even ripping out the buttons when he was in the rush. He’ll smirk while not meaning his apologizing, “sorry, but i’ll buy you it, focus on me right now.”
It felt unusual to only be making out. You’ve craved him, utterly wanted to devour him. Wanted something more than just his tongue inside your mouth and stagnant touches of his fingers on your face. it felt suffocating to be unable to touch his bare body that was rudely still covered with his clothes. 
So without much thought, the burning knot burrowing inside, flaring in the pits of your stomach, had a mind of its own. your hands slowly made their way down his torso, gliding past his stomach. you've noticed he was much more muscularly defined than the last time you touched him. 
“H-have you’ve been working out mor — ahhh,” his hands pushed your face slightly to the side so that his tongue could easily access your neck. The padding of his tongue sliding along the valley of your neckline, and his hot breath sticking to your skin.
“Mhm, can you tell?” he whispered in between kisses, mindlessly running his lips to wherever they landed.
“Yeah, I can feel it through your shirt,” your fingers wrap around his belt, slowly unbuckling the leather, “and your chest feels more squishy,” your slight giggle was no more than a moaning mess when he immediately bucked his hips to cause friction against your throbbing cunt. 
“Gotta look hot for my baby,” Satoru breathed, “especially when it’s been so long since we’ve fuck… shit, you don’t know how much I want you right now.”
You finally got your hands to free his belt, unbuttoning his pants while unzipping his fly down, “how bad?” you taunted, your lips sneaky up to his soft spot — just under his ear. 
Your needy breaths and the sensual overload always set him off. And you were determined to let him succumb to it.
“So so fucking bad,” gulping down his spit, the viscous wad burning his dry throat, “it’s all I think about, oh fuck —” throwing his head back onto the headrest, allowing you to suck at his skin as his hands now firmly held onto your waist.
And just when you were about to feel his pulsating cock, salivating at how warm and sensitive it would be when you could finally get your hands on his member. To swirl your tongue down just under his frenulum while you lathered his length with your spit. Maybe they’ll be time to suck at his ball while you pumped his meaty cock, and run your tongue along the lines of his pretty veins.  
“W-wait baby,” his hands placed on your wrists. With his chest heaving, and hair frazzled, he looked at you with worry.
“Yes?” irritated that he would stop you — never had he stopped you.
“I don’t want you to make any decision that’ll you’ll regret tomorrow,” he confessed, softly looking into your eyes, while a small smile formed at his pretty lips, “I-i can take care of this at home,” slightly looking down at your hands just about to touch his groin, “and we have so much time to do it later,” he reassured while pulling your hands out of his pants, bringing them to your lips to kiss.
“B-but Satoru, I want —”
“I know princess, I know,” his voice mildly trembled, “you don’t know how bad I want you, it’s honestly torturous,” Satoru let out a forced chuckle. 
“Let’s just break the bet then,” you pouted, sinking into his embrace with your arms wrapped around his neck, pressing yourself deeper into his body.
“Hey,” he gently tapped your bum, teasingly playing with your mounds when he heard you whine, “didn't I say…”
“What?” you annoyingly spat out.
“that when I win this bet,” his hands pulled you away, leaving you at eye level with him as he rubbed his thumb against the heat of your cheeks, “fucking is all we’ll do,” he reminded with a slight chuckle. It was undeniable that your boyfriend did not mean what he said as a simple joke. The tone of his voice could sound comical, but the underlying incentive of his statement was nothing but that. 
It was admirable to see your boyfriend set his boundaries, doing his absolute best to honor the bet despite his pupils being dilated and cheeks rosy. The gruff in his voice when he called out your name and while he took his time to dress you up, were telltale signs that he too was at his wits. His wonton look of desperation was plastered over his face, even the slight tremor of his hands as he cupped your cheeks, one last time, to place a kiss on your forehead before leading you up to your apartment door, was nothing short of love. 
— Day 35.
Satoru woke up, took a shower, and had a cup of his pre-workout before heading down to his gym. He felt light on his feet, absolutely flying through his sets. the pebbles of sweat on his forehead felt worthwhile, and the strain of his muscles made him feel alive. 
He's been feeling good. his body was shaped just right — not too big but finely cut and carved to perfection. He's been putting more effort into his grind, and been more involved and fastidious at work with precision and strategy. while still being your dutiful boyfriend who sent thirst photos, of himself post workout, with a good morning text. 
He goes to work sharply dressed, with his shoes freshly oiled. The slight spark of his watch, peeping out of his cuffs, was the definition of the wealth he assessed. With his thin waists but defined chest, it wasn’t hard for people to know just what he had packed under his clothes. 
Satoru signed off on all his charts, attending every repetitive meeting, and joined in on important business deals with partnering companies. He made Ijichi’s life easier by working more thoroughly and leaving promptly.
The last couple of days of this newfound routine will soon come to an end. And the old will come again. Hopefully, he’ll be the victor between Suguru and him. Finally, a time when he could rub it in his best friend’s ego, that he was, in fact, the better of the duo. 
Sitting alone in his office, signing off his last document before calling it a day, Satoru felt a sense of pride and satisfaction. In only two days, he’ll be able to touch you again, make love, and comfortably be himself with limbs wrapped together under the sheets.
Soon, he’ll be able to enjoy the goodness of love — sex, being the much-added benefit. 
As he closed his final folder, leaning back on his chair, reminiscing about the past couple of weeks, it was no lie, the struggle of trying to keep his dick in his pants was no easy feat. Every morning was a mental battlefield of its own. But he’s grown to succumb to his desires and utilize that frustration in other aspects of his life — career, working out, meditating, daydreaming of his future with you and what he hopes to accomplish.
Sure, not being able to nut was tortuous – painful as his cock throbbed in his briefs every morning and with every thought of you. Not being able to even properly kiss you without being tempted to just have you face down on his whatever surface was near and fuck you good was even worse. Nothing has changed in how his dick reacted on its own, his thoughts still lingered in memories of how you would react when he would touch you at your sweet spots, how your body trembled when he inserted himself in, the warmth of your tight walls enveloping his cock. How good you tasted when you came in his mouth, body tense as he massaged your limbs. 
But he’s been good, though he wanted to throw this useless bet out the gutter and selfishly act on his own will, you were proud of him — told him every day when he dropped you off. And that to him was enough. 
Closing out his office, and walking to his car. Talking the elevator down while the clacks of his shoes echoed in the empty parking stall, where only his and a couple of other cars were present, Satoru couldn’t wait to get home.
To take a warm bath, and decompress while joining you on a Facetime call. These days, those sweet moments are what he looked forward to.
He felt the light vibration of his phone and immediately smiled when he saw the sender.
From: pumpkin <3
Babe have you by chance seen my favorite panties?  I think I’ve lost them or left them at your place ):
To: pumpkin <3
I wish I had them But we haven’t fucked at my place in a while …  … you sneaking behind my back? 😭
From: pumpkin <3
Awww I see! Those were my favorites  You’re ridiculous -_- It’s probably under your carseat or something.
To: pumpkin <3
I’ll get you the same pair (: Let me know when you get home, i’ll be home soon
From: pumpkin <3
Okie dokie sexy
Chuckling as he rolled his eyes, he mindlessly placed his phone on the dashboard and started his car. The rumble of his engine loudly echoed in the dark basement, and the lights of his dash could almost blind a person. He shifted his car to drive, and while he stepped on the gas pedal, his phone slid off the dash and fell onto the carpeted floor. 
Grunting as he reached over to grab his phone, he felt a soft fabric brush against the tip of his finger. That was odd. Satoru liked to keep his car clean. So he grabbed the dainty item and hung it on his finger as he registered what it was. 
Truly, god liked to fuck with him. Because on his finger was your missing laced panty. A memory of your last car sex with him before you slammed him with the “let’s not fuck, and you can’t cum till blah blah blah.”
“Fuck…” Satoru hissed, letting out a gluttonous rasp as he spread out his thighs in his seat.
And beneath his slacks was his bulge painfully starting to outline, the size of his cock so obvious despite the dim lighting of his car.
Clenching onto your underwear, he knew he shouldn’t but couldn’t help but unzip his pants and firmly hold his hardened cock, as he unfolded the memory of when he fucked you in his car.
Ten minutes later.
To: pumpkin <3
Ah babe, I think I’m going to get home later than expected. Heavy traffic 
traffic was fine. Satoru just has yet to leave the parking lot.
— A couple hours before D-day.
Dinner reservations were set for 7:30 pm, which meant he needed to be at your place by the latest 6:45. There were countless times when you’ve both missed the reserved time because either one, you fucked one too many rounds at home before heading out, or two, you fucked in the car en route to the restaurant. 
Satoru hoped he would stay sane tonight. All he had to do was endure a couple more hours and when the clock hit midnight, it was game over. 
But when you open your apartment door, it wasn’t a surprise his body moved before his mind could register.
Because when you open the door, giggling while innocently tilting your head to the side as you put on your earrings, the ring on your promised finger sparkling from the backlight, something snapped within him. And despite your lips moving, he couldn’t hear a word you said but the annoying, monotonous ring in his ears as his eyes sharply fixated on you while you made your way to wrap your arms around him.
No, don’t do it. Don’t come.
And in that moment, everything within him exploded.
Before you both even know it, he’s rushing inside your apartment, prying off his shoes while he pushes you onto the wall with his lips desperately smashed on yours. With your wrists caged in one of his larger palms as the other quickly stripped you of your clothes, despite knowing you were on a time crunch, you didn’t necessarily feel compelled to be on time — better, maybe not even make it at all.
“Satoru —” you yelped, only for your voice to morph into wonton moans as his lips suffocated your lungs from the air.
The sound of teeth clashing, hands hunting for more bodily warmth combined with the lewd whines that dissipated from each lips heated your core — just enough to push you onto the edge with your juices pooling in your panties.
His hands expertly slide down your stomach and to the crevice in between your legs. His fingers shove the fabric to the side, exposing your wet cunt that’s just so ready to be played with and touched.
‘Tor —” you barely managed to call his name, his mouth overwhelming with strength as he forced his tongue into yours. With teeth clashing and his hands desperately stripping himself of both your clothes and his, he growled while tugging your lip with his teeth, “I can’t fucking do this anymore.”
“O-our reservation!” you cried out, desperately holding onto him with a leg hooked around his waist, relying on his strength to stand on one foot. With his shirt hanging off his torso, hair now messy and frazzled while he littered your skin with kisses that left you begging for more. 
“Fuck that,” he growled, his breath sounding rough as he threw his freshly pressed shirt on the floor — one probably worth more than your rent itself. 
“It’s nothing new that we’re always late, princess,” he taunted, with his palm placed at the base of your jaw, cupping your cheeks with his left hand while his right unzipped your dress, smirking when it landed on the floor with a thud.
“I told you, angel,” cocking his head to the side as he swiped his tongue upward on your lips, his eyes piercing straight into yours, “ the longer I kept this up the harder you were getting fucked.”
“It’s not over till tomo — ahhh, ” you moaned when his fingers finally played with your folds, and eventually your clit.
“Sorry, I tried, I really did, baby,” groaning as his lips dragged against your neck, his teeth hungrily nipping at your skin while he rubbed circles against your hardened bud. The erotic sound of your slick swirling against his fingers was a combination of embarrassment but also ease – you shouldn’t so readily give in, but oh you wanted to get fucked so badly.
With his vacant hand quickly unhooking your bra and groping your breasts, Satoru kissed his ways down to harshly suck at your nipples, “ but goddamn, i think you’ll actually kill me with this.”
“From not having sex?” you pulled at his hair, both legs automatically wrapping around his waists as he sloppily kissed your mounds, the slime of his saliva coating your areolas to replicate nature’s greatest gem.
“Yea, because my nut’s seriously about to explode,” unbuckling his pants while shimming them down to his ankles, pulling one of your hands down to stroke his heated member, while he pushed your panties to the side, swirling his finger around your clit.
“Gotta take good care of my future children, you know? This is very dangerous, so so dangerous.”
“You’re being r-ridiculous oh,” you moaned out when he pinched your clit, his darkened eyes watching your every expression as he opened his mouth in unison with wonton looks. 
“Shhh pumpkin, aren’t you so cute, ” nibbling on your ears as his sensual breathing made your mind fuzzy and legs wobbly, increasingly more from the soaking sounds of your cunt being played with was ludicrous and naughty, “it’s always over when I say it’s over.”
Humming as he brought his wet fingers up to examine, “god, you’re soaked,” chuckling as he murmurs, “isn’t that fuckin’ cute.” the glimmer of his middle and ring finger enticing him more. “See, you want it too, no? Isn’t my silly girl just ready to be fucked.”
“yes, I want it. want it so, so bad—need it,” you mewled, letting out a soft whimper when he suddenly kissed you, grunting into your mouth.
“but let me release one real quick, ” groaning in between the kiss, "it’s a bit painful," as he palmed at his cock, “where do you want it, sweets?”
“Me…” with cheeks heated, you admitted.
“I asked where,” his words more strained and impatient as the pacing of his palms around his member was getting increasingly faster with more vigor.
And instead of answering, you pointed at the valley of your breasts, pooling your mounds together to catch every drop of his seeds on your skin. 
“Fucking god, I love you,” Satoru cock twitches in his hand, “get on your knees for me, princess,” he ordered before slapping his hardened length on your cheek, “ what my girl wants, is what she gets,” hissing while stroking his shaft, looking down at your sweet position — just ready to take his load. It’s not a surprise that Satoru cums fast, and he comes hard.
When he catches you eyes anticipating for his seeds, to cover you with his release, the knot that’s been burning inside him finally starts to snap. The pleasurable, deep coil of his cum shooting through his slit meshed with your desperate desire to have yourself plastered with every essence of him was enough to drive him off the edge.
“Fuck ‘mma cum, gonna cum so hard baby,” Satoru made a sound between a choked whine and sharp gasp, “gonna cum baby… i —i shit shit…” 
And he does, straight on your chest, splattering bits to the floor and some to your chin, barely making its way into your mouth — a whole fucking mess. 
Panting while he pulled out every ounce of his seeds, thickly splurting out of his sensitive tip, Satoru murmured under his hitched breath, “sorry baby, i—i don’t know what just happened there, fuck.”
“you made a mess,” you chuckle, smiling with a crinkle on your nose.
“Shit… sorry, let me just,” Satoru grabbed his shirt to help clean you off, “but damn such a waste,” you pouted. Annoyed that he didn't get to cum inside you, but also grieving for the loss of his precious seeds going into the trash. 
“It’s your fault,” he murmured, concentrating on cleaning every ounce of his cum off you, “if it wasn’t for that stupid bet, we could’ve done this every day, as much as you wanted,” mimicking your voice with a shake to his head, “but nooo, you had to just bet on my demise.”
“then let me feel you,” you murmur, “let me have you,” cupping his cheeks and brushing a thumb over the skin, his soft lips that you’ve missed so much, “fuck me, ‘Toru, I want you just as bad — so so badly.”
“Fuck you feel so good,” he groaned when he felt the tightness of your hole firmly wrapping a ring around his member. Rhythmically pulsing his hips, slowly gulping down his spit while he closed his eyes, trying his hardest to concentrate so he didn’t pull another quickie and cum prematurely. 
It was a couple hours after he came on your breasts, and a few sessions of sex thereafter that. After multiple positions and fucking in different spaces of your apartment, finally, you’ve made it to the bedroom. 
Feeling your soft walls pulsing and warming his length, just so tightly embracing his cock, inviting him further inside as he settled into you — his home, a place of refuge as he’s held so carefully not only in your arms but also by your cunt. 
He’s eaten you out. Fuck, you tasted so good. His starved appetite satiated with every sucking of your folds, and slobbering of his tongue against your pussy.
He’s watched you squirm and sprinkle the couch, squirting warm liquid while he fingered your cunt. 
He’s seen just how far he can enter when he measured the length of his cock magically disappearing inside you, making you relish in his reign as you shuddered with every impact. 
And he’s felt the warm gush of your cum coating his cock, making a white ring around his length every time he pulled himself out, only to slam it back in. Bullying your wet folds while he painfully swirled his fingers around your clit, satisfied that your cum meshed in with his prior ejaculations were stuffed deeply — fully — inside you.
Your hips buck in tandem with his, matching his rhythm but barely following his pace as he slams into you. His heavy balls slap against your swollen cunt with every thrust of his hips, mildly splattering remnants of his cum off your pussy. And as he buries his cock into you, going as deep as he can, with every thrust you can feel his tip kissing against that sweet spot in the depths of your caverns. your abused cunt continuously sucking him in and hugging around him, tempting him for more, as he groans into your neck, his lips now swollen and red. 
You weren’t entirely sure if he noticed, but you sure did. The throbbing of his cock tightly wrapped by your velvet walls, with every move of his body, made your insides churn into a symphony of pleasure, making you desire more for his cock to bully your cunt — especially when his head brushed against your sweet spot.
The friction of your body meshing with his feels sickening. The thick air of the room makes him feel lightheaded as if he’s being baited in between the realms of reality and another infinite dimension, teasing between the boundaries of possibly falling into an unknown abyss or comfortably landing straight home into your arms. 
It’s always been like that for him. Through all the years he’s been with you, he’s been the one that loved more, loved harder, loved desperately. He doesn’t hold it against you nor does he find fault in what type of lover he was. He just — just, doesn’t hate the idea of letting himself fall into your palm, his soul flourishing in your sovereignty. 
Heart lasciviously yearning for more.
“Right there ‘Toru,” you sob, “right there, give me more more” — of course it’s right there. He’s studied you front and back, but it wasn’t just right there. Because as his thumb finds your clit again, pressing desperate little circles to get you over the edge, he knows it’s actually right there when you squeeze on his cock, your eyes falling to the back of your head while your breaths start to stagger.
That’s — that’s when you cum again—harder than the last time, spasming around his cock and pulling him in as you squeeze around him. “S-satoru,” you gasp, “fuck, k-keep going."
But that — that was a shocker. 
Normally he’ll ride out his orgasm after he’s seen you finish off. But, strange… when he sees the needy glint in your eyes, the tremble of your lips as you used every ounce of your strength to pull him in while you cupped his face, your legs mercilessly bouncing with every thrust of his hips while your thighs were firmly pressed into your chests. 
Murmuring under your breath while you encouraged him to keep going, the invitation has him quickly falling into his own — hot, thick ropes of cum spilling into you, shooting in waves with every twitch of his cock, with every groan pulled from his throat that soon formed into sweet whimpers that he harmonies into your neck, while fucking his load into you and as you held him in your arms, purposefully clenching to edge him off. 
But still, it’s almost embarrassing how fast he cums. Even more embarrassing is how he’s currently withering in your arms, trembling from the aftermath of pumping his hot seeds into you, desperately holding onto you with his face planted into the crook of your neck. 
The way his cum spills out of you and coats his cock, it’s perfect and feels just right. Despite your eyes about to fall shut, you can’t help but think how perfectly he fits intertwined with your body, his slowly softening cock nestled just perfectly inside you as he slumps on top of you, panting from the prior tumultuous rounds of fucking like rabbits as he cages you in his arms.
It’s warm — not only inside you, feeling the clumps spilling out, but love. 
Loving him was warm. Loving him was right. 
Groaning on top of your body, “Don’t ever ask me to do this again.” You can feel his cock slowly start to take its shape again inside you, it was quick but the viscous lumps of his fluid quickly slipped out to make more space for his cock to fill you again.
More — he wanted more. 
“B-but I could’ve treated you out —” your voice was almost gone. You’ll probably get a noise complaint from your neighbors the next morning. 
“babe, the best way you can treat out your baby girl,” Satoru rasped as he fully slipped himself inside you again, eyes rolling to the back of his head for a short moment before carnally staring into your eyes, “is letting him fuck you whenever he wants —”
“Wait wait!” you covered his lips with your hands, cheekily looking up as you then cupped his face, amused as you watched the discontent growl plastered on his expression morph into a pout.
Grumbling, Satoru huffed, “That’s all I've been doing this past month —” 
“I said wait!" stifling his whine, pulling him closer to your bosom to place a kiss on his forehead, delighted to hear the small ring of your phone jingle in tune.
“happy birthday loser,” you cooed.
“You’re the worst for making me go through this,” he chuckled while caging you in, his arms surrounding your head as he brushed his finger against your cheek, his thumb lingering against your swollen lips that were softly smudged with lipstick, “but thank you, 'm getting older, but i’ll fuck you even harder,” he proposed with a wink.
“Wow…” unbelievable that he still had energy, “even with a month of no sex, you’ll still so horny.”
“Yea, because we gotta make babies now,” Satoru chirped, his lips making its way to your swollen nipples, sucking on the tips.
“Thought you didn’t want kids?” 
“Eh, I figured… having a little gremlin like Megumi or Tsumiki-chan wouldn’t be so bad.”
“Just admit it,” running your hands through his sweaty hair, “you like them a lot more than you’ll admit.”
Suddenly propping his head up like a groundhog, with spit trailing down his chin, he corrected, “False, I like them only to an extent because I get tabs on their dad.”
“Tabs about who he’s dating? Why are you going to sell that to the tabloids?” 
“Exactly, Tsumiki-chan always spill the tea, and plus that fart needs some action.” 
“Even though you’re my boyfriend, you really are something.”
“Eh, i’ve gotten better compliments,” he shrugged, his attention going straight back to your nipples.
“ ‘Toru… d-do you think Suguru made it?” a moan slipped from your lips while you positioned yourself more comfortably under him, getting yourself ready.
Letting go of your nipples with a sharp pop, “That fucker wouldn’t lie to me — oh fuck” your boyfriend released a gluttonous moan as he furrowed his brows, hissing while clenching his stomach from absolutely losing it right then and there, “d-don’t clench so suddenly like that.”
“Gotta keep up with the pace, baby girl,” licking your lips while cocking a brow. “So… are you going to fuck me,” clenching while you tugged his hips down to your pelvis, hearing him hiss on the impact made your guts tighten while you watched him melt from the pressure surrounding his heated length pulsing inside you. 
Using all your strength to turn your bodies around, now saddling your legs against his hips as you watched his stunned expression from above, it felt nice being in control. and fully sinking onto his cock as you started rolling your hips in repeated motions, in between wanting breaths, you asked,
“or am I gonna have to fuck you, pretty?” 
— next morning.
Ding!
From: Asshole
so did you succeed? 
To: Asshole
nah, fucked last night. you?
From: Asshole
nice.  but happy birthday, bro.
To: Asshole
thx so, you pulled through?
From: Asshole (5 hours later)
nah, we fucked the day after making the bet.  fucked again just now, too :P
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author's note: omg... first sooo sorry for the lack of editing on this. holy smokes, it was way too long and i didn't dare to read through all of this. but if you have, thank you! i greatly appreciate you
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