#you don’t understand her you also just love to crucify flawed young women and i’m fucking sick of it

[cowboycereal]

you actually have to take a class on rory gilmore and write an extensive thesis paper on the value of her character arc centering on making juvenile mistakes because she’s a young woman coming into her own for the first time and she’s not a saint or a demon but somewhere in between because she’s a complex person with flaws and positive qualities! yeah and once you pass the class you get a certificate and that’s when you’re allowed to talk about rory gilmore

#han.txt #rory gilmore #you don’t understand her you also just love to crucify flawed young women and i’m fucking sick of it #leave her alone!!!! picture me banging on the bars of my enclosure just screaming leave her alone!!! #gilmore girls

[luckycheesefoodie321]

ok...ok ok ok... ok... so I watched Mulan (2020)... spoilers + LONG POST (yo this took me an hour and a half)...

before yall scream at me for spending money on it, lemme just say i was fully intending to wait until December so that I would not have to give even more money to the Disney machine (especially in light of things that happened with John Boyega) nor endorse individuals who support police brutality or oppression... but my mum and sister nagged me to buy it so we could watch it now, and explaining the politics of supporting both Disney’s greed and the controversy around the lead actress and would’ve just frustrated us both so I paid for it -_- please don’t crucify me... 

also want to preface this by saying I am not Chinese (though I am Asian), and I understand that the 1998 film and this film have inherent issues, given neither were directed by Asian directors, let alone Chinese ones... so the representation of the Chinese culture is likely flawed (and likely straight up wrong) in many ways... additionally, Li Yifei has been shown to support the actions of police in Hong Kong, so just know I’m viewing her role purely from an acting and movie standpoint...

now that’s done... general rating for the movie

when compared to the original animated film (my favourite Disney movie of all time): scrapes by on a 5/10

movie that stands on its own as I watched it (just note I’m the type of person who can enjoy pretty much anything - even if I’m hyper-critical of it): 7/10 (I’m very generous but my viewing experience was nice)

if I break it down completely into its underlying faults and wash away the Hollywood sheen and the nostalgia filter: 4/10 for themes 8/10 for cinematography and the technical aspects... (this movie was gorgeous to look at and had some really fun camera work, sue me for enjoying the visuals)

Full SPOILER review:

For the most part, my nostalgia filter from the animated film, which I dearly dearly love, basically had me ecstatic anytime there was even a hint of a reference to the animated film (see: occasional notes from the songs), and also sorely disappointed when the acting or the general pace pulled the fun or the emotion from key points (see: A Girl Worth Fighting For being abruptly cut off upon seeing the carnage would’ve been so much more impactful because they actually showed the bodies in the 2020 version but instead we got this kinda funny convo referencing the lines completely separated from that scene)...

The biggest issue I have with the film is that Mulan was naturally skilled from the beginning and was told to suppress her abilities.. making her OP from the beginning undermines the 1998 journey where we see every step of her development both in physical ability and her emotional struggles... then through her wits, intelligence, and strategy, as well as being on par and even better than her fellow soldiers, she manages to defeat Shan Yu and makes us feel her “Hero” status is very much earned... so it takes away from what the 1998 film tried to show in suggesting Mulan could just OP her way to victory at the drop of a hat.. and also implied her being dishonest about her true identity was her primary flaw? idk thematically they were trying to be super empowering of women and the capability of women, and the boxes women are forced into according to society... but then suggest Mulan was always inherently gifted/had a special power and that is why she succeeded, while the other soldiers worked hard and effectively achieved the same goal (albeit in a less flashy manner)... so the message gets very confusing...

i felt that Xian Niang (was that her name?), the Witch, had a lot of potential, but I was also really concerned they introduced her to make sure Mulan had a female enemy to defeat, and Shan Yu/Bori Khan was a minion of this female enemy... so in that sense I’m glad she served as a foil to Mulan... I would’ve liked the parallels more if the “being your true self”/”bring honor to us all” theme wasn’t so muddled... Mulan was accepted while XIan Niang wasn’t because they both had powers, but then Mulan convinces her to take the noble path and so Xian Niang died for her? idk there was a better way to fold her into the story...

Shan Yu/Bori Khan was about as much as I expected from him... I think he matched Shan Yu for skill, though idk about ferocity or intimidation power, though the actor was decent enough... but I did enjoy his and Mulan’s fight... less impactful because he didn’t even know about her and how she was the one to take down most of his army...

didn’t mind that Mushu was missing... fondly referred to the phoenix as Mushu (though I understand there may be cultural missteps in a phoenix being the spirit/ancestor/guardian)...

I also didn’t mind they removed the power imbalance between Shang and Mulan and had her love interest be a fellow soldier...I really liked Yoson An’s character actually...but the romance element was significantly dialled back, so we didn’t get the bisexual icon that is Li Shang... also Li Yifei’s emotional acting was normal but not outstanding... so her feelings for Honghui didn’t really register much except for that first time they chat in the barracks about girls, and right before she goes home... (just me being pouty about him not joining the Imperial Guards to Mulan’s home and presenting himself for matchmaking... though I understand it was to keep focus on Mulan’s journey, not her love interest)...

while it probably wasn’t the intention of the 1998 film, the positive portrayal of gender fluidity, the specific empowerment of trans and bisexual individuals through Mulan and Shang (bc let’s get real, he was just as attracted to Ping as he was Mulan), all did not ring in quite the same way in the 2020 version... again I’m not part of either community, so I can’t say for sure, but this is what I read from it...

overall the fun was taken out, with the songs... I would say this is probably on the higher end of Disney Live Action adaptations, there were some fun moments and funny dialogue even, and I didn’t mind that they were trying to do something different, unlike some of the others which made it note for note the same... but ultimately the biggest flaw of most of the adaptations are that it removes the fun and the levity in lieu of a more serious tone... 

I accepted no songs (I was hopeful and then pleasantly surprised when they did pay some minor homages through the score to the original’s songs)... but the fun moments were meant to be intentionally undercut by the reality of the war... there’s a reason A Girl Worth Fighting For was cut off so abruptly in the 1998 version... it was the moment where these trainees (all of them young and having never experienced battle or war before) suddenly realised the severity of the situation before them, and it was in that moment they accepted their fate and duty to protect the kingdom...

the 2020 version just kind of had them walk through the carnage without any real build up... the grand battle sequence with the avalanche was pretty well done, the overdramatic “Hua Jun died but Mulan lived” scene notwithstanding.. i didn’t mind that Mulan volunteered to expose herself rather than be forced half-naked into the snow by the Chancellor dude... didn’t like Honghui got the “you listened to Hua Jun, why is Hua Mulan any different?” line... the “I believe in Hua Mulan” was kinda goofy, but I could see what they were going for... it was kinda undermined by the Commander saying “you dishonoured your family and this regiment but hey, you’re brave and loyal kid”...felt very patronising...

I’m not gonna lie, I kinda loved Cricket... he was adorable and I had half a heart attack when I thought he’d died... 

DIDN’T REALISE MING NA WEN MADE A CAMEO UNTIL I CAME ON HERE...so that was nice..

still pissed they didn’t even put the drum beats for “I’ll Make a Man Outta You”...they were using drums during the training sequence too so would’ve been real easy to do so AND THEY DIDN’T...they did it for “Bring Honor to Us All” and “Reflection”...idk why they couldn’t even give us that much of my favourite Disney song...

again, cannot emphasise enough how gorgeous this whole movie looked...and there were so many fun camera work moments... the visuals had me dead on the floor ya’ll...

idk what else i have to say now...

tl;dr I enjoyed the experience of watching it, but hooooo boi the film is flawed as hell...

#mulan #mulan 2020 #long post #spoilers #mulan 2020 spoilers #disney #spoiler post #movie review

[sheikah]

Tbf to Mirri, dothraki pillaged her entire village, they raped their women, killed their husbands and children. This was done as Jorah pointed out, to collect resources to go to westeros for the throne. Dany intervened but her solution was to get these women who had been raped by the dorthki to marry their rapists. Mirri took revenge, her reaction to drogo and drogo's baby is not entirely based on nothing. This is a complicated situation, we can't just ignore the suffering of Mirri's village.

Who said we should ignore their suffering? I’m saying a meta defending Mirri by implying she and Daenerys, Daenerys–not the Dothraki as a whole, not Drogo–were equally wrong in this scenario is ridiculous. Mirri’s suffering was profound, unjust, and cruel. She was also an adult and highly intelligent woman who looked at a young girl who tried, again tried, to help her and decided to kill that young girl’s husband (which I get–that’s righteous vengeance imo, but in doing so she also left Daenerys--another woman who is a cog in the patriarchal system--alone without protection) and unborn child. Sorry, but my pity for Mirri ended when she killed Rhaego and did it with a smile, taking great joy in Dany’s suffering. Dany executing Mirri in kind (life pays for life) was justice imo and I’m glad she did it. I stand by that. By doing so she took a powerful stance in front of her remaining people and punished someone who murdered the only family she had left. And Mirri committed that murder not out of self defense or necessity, but out of spite and with sadistic glee. Sorry guys, but I’m not going to shed a tear for Mirri Maz Duur. She killed Dany’s baby, her only remaining family, and then caused Dany a lifetime of pain afterward by telling her she was infertile and leading her to believe that she could never have a family again. That is its own sort of cruelty, and cruelty she leveled at the person who didn’t hurt her, and did the best she could to save her. 

What I find so odd about the dark Dany crowd (not you, anon, just kind of sounding off here) is that they fixate on these deaths that are honestly cut and dry to me. They fixate on people like Viserys and Kraznys and Mirri and Randyll Tarly, people I’m frankly glad Dany killed. The masters in Meereen who crucified children, or who stood by and allowed the crucifixions, regardless of their personal feelings on the matter. The Lannisters and turncoat Tarly soldiers who sacked Highgarden without leaving any survivors, who looted the Reach and stole food and money from its inhabitants. People in the fandom speak out on behalf of these people all the time and I don’t understand it because to me Dany was clearly making the right call in these scenarios. But as much as I love and adore Dany and see her as a hero, I can admit that like any character, she has flaws. If people want to fixate on her flaws and the deaths of characters who maybe didn’t deserve to die, what about Mossador? What about Doreah? The arguments the antis choose to make against Dany just tell me that we don’t watch the show through the same lens to begin with and don’t have the same idea of right and wrong. 

#answered

[deilands]

The (Gas)Light of God

Before I begin writing this entry, I want to make it clear of my reasoning for composing a post of this sort. My audience is varied and some are people of faith and some are not. Some are questioning their faith and some have already walked away. I would not feign to call myself a spiritual scholar or philosopher but at times I have thoughts that run through my head that need to be put on paper. For some this may express thoughts that you’ve had before but haven’t really been able to properly attack them. For others, this may be offensive. In either case, understand that I am not attacking any individual personally. I am not trying to take anyone’s religion away from them. I am simply placing my own thoughts out into the ether. Also – one last note – I may edit this as time goes on to add to the length. But I wanted to get started at least.

Part 1: What is Gas-Lighting?

In 1944, a movie called Gaslight debuted. It starred Ingrid Bergman and Charles Boyer. In this story, a woman named Paula (played by Bergman) marries a man named Gregory Anton (played by Boyer) after a whirlwind romance. They are in love and they are happy and Gregory persuaded Paula to leave her home and move with him far away from her community to London where she knows no one.

Things quickly take a turn for the worse as strange things begin to happen to Paula. Things begin vanishing from around her. Paintings that were on the wall disappear, a personal broach that she had kept in a particular place vanishes, and all the while Gregory tries to convince her that she is the one causing the disappearances. She also notices that the gas lights in the house seem to be dimmer each day – except when she asks her husband about these things, he convinces her that she is just seeing things. Slowly, but surely, unable to trust her own senses – she begins to go crazy. Gregory’s end goal? To have her institutionalized so he can steal her family jewels.

Gas-lighting is now known as a number of behaviors used to control a victim by making them doubt their own reality. According to “Turning up the lights on Gaslighting” by Kate Abramson, gaslighting “is a form of emotional manipulation in which the gaslighter tries (consciously or not) to induce in someone the sense that her reactions, perceptions, memories and/or beliefs are not just mistaken, but utterly without grounds—paradigmatically, so unfounded as to qualify as crazy.”

It’s important to note that this is not usually done consciously by the abuser but as part of a grander unknown scheme that exists within their head.

I want to posit in this journal that the Christian god can, if not constrained, become an amazing element of gas-lighting and as a result can damage people in a way much more profound than from a traditional relationship.

Part 2 – It’s YOUR Fault

Instead of building from the minor examples of how the Christian narrative tends to gaslight believers, I want to start from my largest supposition and work down.

According to Christianity, the reason that the world is corrupt - that sin and death exist, that children die by the millions each year, and that enumerable atrocities both man-made and natural happen is due to one thing. You.

You are the cause in some way of this insidious destruction which leaves so many to mourn. You are the reason that God sent his only son to die on a cross. Every time you think of someone lustfully you nail again Jesus to the cross. Every time you are angry without cause at your brother, you stab another nail into his hand. After all – if mankind wouldn’t have sinned in the first place, none of this would have ever happened.

But that’s ok. God forgives you. He loves you. Just don’t do it ever again.

I want to pause and post a few of the traits of a person who is feeling the effects of gaslighting:

1)  You feel the need to apologize all the time for what you do or who you are.

2)  You never quite feel “good enough” and try to live up to the expectations and demands of others, even if they are unreasonable or harm you in some way.

3)  You feel like there’s something fundamentally wrong with you, e.g. you’re neurotic or are “losing it.”

Most importantly, a person who is being gas-lit is being convinced that their own mental faculties and their own beliefs and their own story is somehow tainted and incorrect. They are convinced that they are the one in the wrong – that they can’t even trust their own choices or their own minds.

We were taught as Christians from a young age that we can’t trust our own hearts. They are, after all corrupted by sin. Our own decision making is flawed. I’ve sung many songs about Jesus being more and me being less because when it came to who was better, the person I was wasn’t good enough and could never be good enough no matter what I did.

It was all filthy rags.

But let me ask you a question. Who is more powerful here? If the Christian God existed, wouldn’t he be?  If God is unable to create a perfect being who lives perfectly and does perfectly then doesn’t the blame fall not on man but on God? If I place a chocolate cake in front of a two-year-old and walk away after telling them not to eat it and they do it anyway – who is really to blame? Is it me or is it the two-year-old?

If God were to be the creator of the universe and were to give mankind all of the traits that express themselves as what Christians call sin and then expect them not to fall prey to those devices and THEN when they do – blame them for HIS mistakes… is this not gas-lighting?

Part 3 – Who are you to question?

Even as a Christian, the most disturbing story that I ever read in Scripture has to have been the story of Job. Imagine this – God and the Devil are hanging out up in heaven and the Devil says, “Hey, God, I betcha I can make Job curse you.”

Of course, God being all-knowing says, “Uh, I don’t take bets. Especially when I know what happens in the end.”

No. No. No. I’m sorry. That’s the way it would have happened with a compassionate God.

Sorry. God, sometimes having a penchant for gambling, tells the devil, “Sure. Go ahead. Take your best shot.”

So, the devil does. He kills and he maims and he disenfranchises Job among his friends. He destroys the life of this guy so that he and God can settle a bet that God (according to Christian doctrine) already knew the answer to.

And in the end? When Job deigns to question what the crap happened?

The perfect response from a Gas-Lighting Creator. “Who are you to question me?”

Imagine telling this to your kids. You take away everything they hold dear. I’m not talking about grounding them to their room. I’m talking about killing their favorite kitten, shredding their beloved teddy-bear, burning all of their clothes, and destroying every last thing that they hold dear. Why? Oh – because the neighbor bet that if that stuff happened your kid would hate you.

And when your child – who has been better-behaved than any child could be, asks you why? You tell him, “Who are you to question me. I’m your father. I give and I take away.”

You’d be arrested for child abuse. How many people have questioned God when their child got sick or their job got lost only to be told by well-meaning individuals, “It must just be part of God’s plan. He knows.”

That, my friends, is gas-lighting.

Part 4 – A glass of cognitive-dissonance anyone?

I think the most difficult part to recognize in all of this is that it happens slowly and methodically. We are taught by the church that we are horrible people and only believing in the God of the Scriptures will save us. We feel accepted because the words sound nice on the surface and we are hurting so much. A person doesn’t get into a relationship with a narcissist because they are mean. They get involved because that person shows all of the best things.

I can heal your hurt. I can take away the pain. I can help you lose the guilt and the shame. I can bring you joy and happiness. I can show you love.

If. And this is the truth that reveals the lie. If you will follow my commands. If you will become a slave to me. If you will let me invade your life and change your friends and isolate you from all of those people that aren’t like us. If you will give up everything – your mother, your father, your sister, your brother – to follow me. Then, I will do these things for you.

What is even more insidious is this. I don’t believe that there ever was a Christ that was crucified. I don’t believe that there is a Jehova Jireh waiting to provide if I do all of the right things and pray the right prayers. What I do believe is that a group of people, searching for answers – and eventually for power – created an amazingly powerful institution that convinced people that they were inherently evil in and of themselves.

It convinced them that they couldn’t trust their own hearts.

It convinced them that their conscience was seared as with an iron and their faculties were controlled by desires that were not proper. It told them not to question because questioning was pride. It told them to accept that all things happened for the better. “I’m only doing this for your good.”

And even more so it had a potion for all of this. Eat of this body, drink of this blood and all will be well. But is it well? Has he lived up to his bargain? Or does he simply ask for more. And more. Do you feel confused as children continue to die while prayers are lifted when the God of Mark says that you can heal the sick? Do you feel hurt while you have to explain why God was ok with the Israelites raping women?

I can’t.

It doesn’t really seem to have gotten any better to me and I want to tell you something important.

YOU ARE GOOD IN YOURSELF. You don’t need to be justified or sanctified because, let’s be honest – If God needed to let us commit atrocities so that he could send his son to die to appease himself. . . if he needed to create mankind on this little blip of a planet in this tiny solar system in a galaxy that is only one of millions of others just so that he could be worshiped? Damn. That’s the greatest gas-lighter I’ve ever heard of.

I’m sorry if this post seemed hard. I’ve heard stories tonight and they break my heart and in that I am angry.

#Religion #deconversion #faith #gaslighting #atheism #agnosticism #Christianity #anger