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because-i-am-barely-even-human · 3 years

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4 times Buck and Eddie pretend to have sex to get rid of someone + 1 time there's no need to pretend

prompt

1) Shannon Diaz

You see, the first time it happened it was totally an accident and misunderstanding (not that Eddie complains how the things turned out in the end).

Shannon just showed up after leaving Christopher (and him) a few years ago. And it seems like she not only wanted to see Chris but expected to get back together with Eddie like there’s no bad blood between them. And that was a firm Nope. No, he does not want to have anything to do with her. He’s not sure he wants to let her into Christopher’s life after her abrupt leave. For Christ’s sake, she didn’t even call to check how their son is doing! What did she expect? A warm welcome? He ranted about this to Buck.

So, the second time she shows up, unannounced, might he add, Buck is conveniently at Diazes’ house. Both of them just came back from 24 hour shift. Chris is at Abuela’s still. So when Shannon comes over she did not expect the half naked guy to open the door to her (technically) husband’s house. He looks like he just came out of the shower and before she can say (yell) anything (like “who the hell are you and what are you doing here undressed like that?”) Eddie comes from down the hall in only a fucking towel.

Eddie: Cariño, who’s there?

Shannon is speechless. She knows enough Spanish to understand this. In all the time that they were together Eddie never called her sweetheart. And by the looks of it she does not need any context here, it’s pretty much obvious what they were doing.

She leaves abruptly without a word, forgetting to ask after Christopher. It is obvious that their marriage is officially over.

Both men quickly guessed to what conclusion she might have came. It was hilarious. And incredibly convenient for Eddie. Buck didn’t mind the assumptions at all.

2) Taylor Kelly

The second time it happened because Buck panicked. Taylor Kelly was at the station. Eddie is not a fan, Buck is not as well. She shamelessly flirts with Buck ignoring the fact that he looks extremely uncomfortable because of her attention. The reporter just does not get a hint. Buck hides in a locker room, that’s where Eddie finds him. He’s freaking out and practically begs Eddie to help him to get rid of Taylor. And Diaz is totally on board with that (not to mention that he might have sought Evan with familiar suggestion).

Eddie just finished working out which helps to reinforce their act. His hair is sticking out like someone ran their fingers through it. And he’s flushed and sweaty, perfect. Buck, though, doesn’t look convincing. So Eddie has some ideas™. They’ve been friends for a few months and they got close quickly. Some might say they ended up real close. They liked to kid around and were shameless and sometimes had no boundaries concerning each other. It felt natural. So Eddie gave Buck some hickeys, both of them giggling the whole time while doing it. Buck gave Eddie some too, you know, to make it look real.

After the dynamic duo’s impromptu departure and then their sudden appearance, firefighters of 118 took a note of how Taylor Kelly was pissed and acted even more bratty than before. She stopped chasing (because that’s what it looked like) Buck and left station with her crew soon after. The team sighed in relief.

No one said anything about hickeys because everyone is used to Buddie’s weird behavior.

3) Abby Clark

The third time, Buck was a bit oblivious when it happened. After Abby came back to LA, and with a fiancé no less, Buck was moody. Not because he missed her (that ship sailed a long time ago), but because he was annoyed and pissed at her behavior. He talked at length with Eddie about his abandonment issues and how Abby contributed to it.

She wanted to talk. Buck did not. Abby kept calling Buck a few times a day but he never picked up.

Then one evening, after a long shift, Eddie and Buck were hanging out at his loft. Evan was a bit distracted at the moment. You see, his bad leg was hurting so Eddie was giving him a massage, it was a normal occurrence. So when Abby fucking Clark called again Buck wasn’t mindful of what kind of sounds he made or what he was saying while answering.

Eddie: Is this ok?

Buck: Of course it is! Fuck, don’t stop, Eddie.

Buck asked what did she want and please, stop calling me, I’m busy.

Abby was mortified. She finally left Evan Buckley alone. Her apologies were too late and not needed anymore.

Though Buck was oblivious at first, Eddie certainly knew what he was doing and how did it sound to Abby. He was a little bit petty, so what? Plus when Buck realized what did they sound like they lost it again. It was like that time with Shannon. When they told the team about it they lost it too, for different reasons though.

4) Ana Flores

The fourth and last time it happened, it turned real.

Eddie was seeing Ana for a few short months, frankly speaking, he didn’t know why he asked her out. She was pretty (not completely his type tho) and nice at first, then she started to act snobbish. They had nothing in common, and she creeped him out after their math date™ or whatever the fuck she tried to turn it into. Ana was pushy about being intimate when he hadn’t felt any sort of attraction to her. He thought maybe it was because she was practically a stranger and they needed time, but she was adamant on getting into his pants and he noped right out of this, because fuck if he was going to let someone to pressure him into doing anything he didn’t want to.

He told Buck about this shit and he suggested to break this thing off and fast, this is not healthy.

So Eddie broke up with Ana the morning the shooting happened after she snooped around on GoFundMe site. Evan was aware of the break up.

So imagine Eddie’s frustration when he was getting discharged and Ms Flores thought it was a brilliant idea to show up and try to convince him to start over.

Eddie got the message from Hen that Ana was coming to his room at the hospital (let’s say Hen was there restocking the ambulance when she noticed her). Buck was trying to help Eddie dress into sweatpants when the door opened and Eddie had a second to come up with their usual plan of making people to fuck off. He put his hand on Buck’s neck and quietly asked him to play along.

Ana determined to make Edmundo see reason and get back together was quite shocked at what she saw. Evan (his best friend, she should have known) was on his knees before Edmundo who definitely wasn’t wearing pants and moving his head quite enthusiastically, while Edmundo looked down with the dark eyes and the hottest expression on his face (she wished he looked at her like that). She should have known this was the reason he was so harshly refusing to get intimate with her. Edmundo was fooling around with Evan this whole time! How many times did they do this behind her back? How dare they?

And yeah, Ms Flores never entertained the thought that she might have been the problem all along and she had some creepy vibes (many of her exes can attest to that).

Embarrassed and angry that another one of her relationships ended in disaster, she stormed away.

The thing is that during their little play Buck actually slipped Eddie’s boxers off, not that Eddie minded. They promptly forgot about Ana or anything else.

----

If someone’s interested in writing this, please tag me when you’re done.

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sterekgala-blog · 6 years

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A rec list will be posted every day with a few of our favorite Sterek holiday fics, and a masterpost of all our rec lists will be posted on the 31st. Requests are always welcomed!

New Year’s Countdown Rec List #12

Sweeter Than a Cherry Pie by kitsunequeen || 5k

When Cora asks Stiles to be her pretend boyfriend for a New Year's family dinner, he figures he can do a friend a favor. When he hooks up with an incredible guy, Derek, the night before, only to wake up alone in the morning, he supposes he can handle that too. But when he shows up at Cora's house and Derek turns out to be her brother, well... that's a bit of a bigger problem.

Soooooooo much misunderstanding and my heart feaking loves it!

on the right track by HalfFizzbin || 1.5k

Stiles is stuck on a broken-down train instead of dancing with Lydia at a swanky New Year's Eve party, which sucks. OR DOES IT?

(Basic premise blatantly ripped off from Boy Meets World 3x10, “Train of Fools.”)

I love boy meets world too much not to rec this loveliness

Imagine Me And You by callunavulgari || 16k

“My name,” the kid tells Derek, sounding amused. “It’s Stiles. I figure if I’m going to wrestle a complete stranger for a pumpkin the least I can do is offer my name afterwards.”

“Stiles,” Derek tries, testing the way the name sits on his tongue. “I’m Derek.”

“Derek,” Stiles breathes, like he’s testing the weight of the name too. He grins, bright and blinding, which Derek guesses means that he likes the sound of it. “I’d offer to shake your hand, but since we almost got to second base a minute ago, I’d say we’re past that point.”

This is a cute fic and it includes a bunch of different holiday events like halloween and christmas and new years and all that awesomeness

New Year’s Eve by bibliosexual || 2.5k

Really cute tumblr fic about our fav dorks in the HP universe during the most wonderful time of the year

Jingle Bells by BansheeLydia || 5k

They were the exact opposite of each other. Derek hated Stiles’ loudness, his confidence, his vocabulary, the way he moved his hands when he talked, his stupid jokes and his smirk and his insistence that modern was the way forward, trampling over anything traditional about bookstores. Stiles hated Derek’s arrogance, his quiet disdain, his snobbish, stubborn, stick-in-the-mud attitude that he was right and his way was better, he hated his refusal to even acknowledge that Stiles’ bookstore worked for a lot of people, and he hated how attractive Derek was because sometimes it made him hard to focus on how much he loathed Derek’s scowl.

Stiles and Derek are rival bookstore owners, but that might change when Stiles finds Derek alone on Christmas Eve.

RIVAL BOOKSTORE OWNERS!!!! DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY IDEA HOW AWESOME THIS TROPE IS?!?!? I NEED MORE OF THIS RIGHT FREAKING NOW!!!!

New Year’s Kiss by AJ2000 || 1.5k

I may have squealed while reading the fluffiness that is this tumblr fic

But In Case I Stand One Little Chance by mikkimouse || 8.5k

Stiles's Jeep breaks down in the middle of the snowstorm. He's rescued by his high school crush, and as the cherry on top, is trapped in a cabin with said crush until the roads clear.

Fuck his life.

I wish I had Stiles’ luck to be honest XD

Five Times Derek and Stiles Wanted the Same Book (And One Time There Were Two Copies) by mikkimouse || 3k

"Hey!" Stiles yanked the book back, but the other guy had a firm grip on it. "What are you--"

He trailed off when he set eyes on the leather-clad god with a glare that could strip paint off a car who also had hold of the book.

Stiles gulped, but he didn't let go. "Hey, dude, I had it first."

Those powerful black eyebrows bent down further. "Like hell you did."

This is honestly one of my favs, it’s just so adorable

Snow Place Like Home by blacktofade || 2k

In which there are snowball fights, werewolf snowmen, and itchy ugly sweaters from Stiles' grandma.

This is literally just too cute

Let it snow! Let it snow! (but please let it stop eventually) by relenafanel || 20k

Stiles grew up with his bedroom window overlooking Derek's bedroom, so when he returns home for the holidays he's surprised to find a stranger in his nerdy neighbour's bedroom.

Only, he's not much of a stranger.

It is Derek Hale, the guy who is going to be his new step brother, if the rumours are true.

Perfect mix of so many tropes!

Red Against the Snow by Ember || 35k

Little Red Riding Hood isn’t just one story. People are mistaken about that. Hell, Grimm wasn’t even original about it. The first guy to publish it was actually Charles Perrault, a french writer who wrote shit for the Louis XIV’s court. And damn, there was nothing subtle about it. Stiles is trapped for the holidays in the cabin of a strange man/hermit named Derek. A strangely friendly wolf befriends Stiles during his stay. It's up to the teenager to find out why Derek has secluded himself from society, what the feelings he's beginning to have means, and what the connection between the mysterious man and the mysterious black wolf is.

I love this story so damn much I can’t even put it into words it’s just such a masterpiece

Bet On It by IDreamOnlyOfYou (lauren3210) || 8k

Stiles is an RN and Derek the attending trauma surgeon at Beacon Hills Hospital. They're constantly arguing, much to the amusement of their colleagues, who ultimately decide to take bets on when the sexual tension will finally explode. The only question is, who will win the jackpot?

5 times one of the guys try to push Derek and Stiles together, and the time they worked it out all on their own.

I love it when the only people in the entire fic that don’t notice Stiles and Derek are totally in love are Stiles and Derek XD

Cupboard Love by mklutz || 32k

He’s carefully balancing the sandwiches and the two biggest tupperware containers he could find that both had functioning lids when the front door opens and he almost drops everything right there in front of the stupid fountain.

If that’s Derek Hale, he’s definitely not a mountain man.

This is probably one of the darlings of the sterek fandom and it has every right to be, everyone should read this absolute perfection

Thirteen Days of Christmas by Ark || 6k

Derek is looking at Stiles like a little help here? and also like he hasn't seen Stiles since the summer and can't stop himself from looking. Derek's very good at looking. Has always been good at that.

What does he think of Stiles's new, scruffier hairstyle, the way he's finally filled out all the lanky with the freshman 15? Can he see the lines of Stiles's new tattoo snaking along his collarbone, showing at the seam of his t-shirt? Can he smell that Stiles isn't a virgin anymore? Can that be sniffed?

Stiles comes back from college and Derek is all hot and bothered by his new found sexiness ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

until the clock strikes midnight again by decideophobia || 5k

Derek stumbles upon a test then, towards the end of the magazine, and before he realizes what he’s doing, he’s reading out loud, “Are you good in bed?”

Stiles drops his pen.

FIREFIGHTER!DEREK AND NURSE!STILES!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH

1|| 2|| 3|| 4|| 5|| 6|| 7|| 8|| 9|| 10|| 11|| 12|| 13|| 14|| 15

Submit in your favorite winter fics here so they can claim a spot on our countdown list! Any winter fics, old or new, are welcomed!!!

#Sterek #sterek fic #sterek fanfiction #stiles stilinski #derek hale #christmas #new years #holiday fic #rec list #new years countdown #sterek gala

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typing-dreams · 6 years

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back to the start

so I really love this little profile I have. I think I have 20 followers top, and thank goodness no one that I know in real life. I can write in English without feeling a know-it-all because it’s not my first language. for some reason, writing in some other language when it’s not your first one seems snobbish and fake. but, truth is, I love writing in English. it makes me think twice about what I am writing. also, since I am studying totally in English, it just feels natural. anywhere else this would have come across as snobbish, fake, and again, back to the know-it-all.

it must be a pretty stressful period for me if I am just vomiting words in English. I must be struggling a lot, so much in fact that I feel the need to switch to another language and just write down some thoughts, because honestly, they are becoming too much. or too many, it depends on the point of view I suppose. that phrase was too long, should have stopped somewhere there. oh well.

what feels so heavy? what is that too much? in Italian we have this little saying that I love: the drop that made the vase overflow. it is just so powerful.

let’s proceed with some semblance order, shall we?

last week, this guy I barely knew from our local volleyball community (which is part of the max championship in Italy for volleyball, but still, since soccer exists, it feels like neighbourhood even if the other team is thousands of kilometres apart. BUT I will not start ranting about that now, and here). again, this guy I barely exchanged two words with answers my instagram story. I answered laughing, because really, it was the only possible way, and he writes again. I don’t remember about what, but it doesn’t matter. no, what matters is that then he wrote again. and again. it went on the whole morning, from work, to lunch, to uni, to home. at the end of the day he bid me goodnight.

two noticeable things here.

1. I usually tire pretty fast if I’m talking about nonsense. always been a pragmatic girl, if we talk it must be about something. and the fact that I don’t remember a single world about it, other than HE gave me his phone number and HE carried on with the chat, proves that it was, in fact, chat about non sense. idle things, little nothings, so many ways to paraphrase this, I love writing in English.

2. let me ask this as a question: do you usually bid goodnight to people you just met? I’ll answer honestly: yes, if it’s late enough and we’re tired and the conversation led to that. it did. goodnight, no kisses, no smiles, just that. what’s strange then? nothing, for now.

but going on, the following morning I wake up with a good morning. and a reference to the instagram story that started it all. and the conversation began again. bla bla blas really. I don’t grow tired of it, which when I stop for a second and think about it strucks me as strange, but hey, maybe finally... evidently, it must be the same for him, because he writes of everything and anything. what did he have for lunch, was the salad good and what was the lesson about? he bids me goodnight that night too. and good morning, and goodnight, and goodmorning and...

“what do you say? should we grab a bite somewhere? when you’re free?”

this was the third day. he mentioned something about coming to my grans to steal a bit of cake, it was my fathers birthday, but not seriously. that question was just that, but a question it was. almost shy, and it felt like a wind of spring (don't think this exists in English, “ventata di primavera”, Italian, a bit of freshness to put it simply)

crap, I must accelerate, dinners almost ready.

ok, so, I sort of avoid answering that question, mainly because it seemed too much and too soon for my standards, but also because apparently, we were both busy people, and there was no space to meet until next week. and the conversation goes on and on, so much so that I tell my mother. I’m usually pretty enthusiastic when these things happen, it’s just that good feeling that I get to feel sadly very rarely. but, this time, even my imagination wanted to be careful, to go slowly. please let this not be another asshole. I have started cataloguing those assholes per month.(with my friends, we call them human cases, but I don’t know if it makes sense in English. basically they are assholes, but with many different problems too, usually in their head. nobody’s perfect, definitely not me, but it’s like I have a radar to detect the worst ones out there.)

anyway, stop digressing, he mentions going out daily, but not insistently, and then, the genius. you see, we have two friends in common. one is my best friends, and she comes to the sport place where the volley matches are so the guy and her know each other. but he also knows my best friend’s boyfriend, so it came naturally to organise dinner with them included in the equation. it made me feel a lot better, because the first time alone... it’s not my forte let’s just leave it at that. great, so on with the conversation, not so smoothly because really, it looks like he’s not interested in anything other than soccer. no Harry Potter, no marvel, no books, no movies, no music. apparently he works and he plays soccer. stop. but I tell myself not to worry, because the topics will come, we will create them without even noticing. fast forward to Tuesday, the day before the dinner. I was at uni, law lesson (yeey) when he writes me: I have to ask you something, when do you get out of there? suuuuure man, no anxiety here eh? don’t worry, nothing serious, it’s just a long thing and I didn't want to distract you. nice. pity that lessons have a break, I inform him of such, and he starts writing.

it goes like this, pretty much

- ok so it may seem trivial but just answer “yes” or “no”, it’s just for me, forgive me in advance

(again, I’m not a ball of anxiety, nooo) so I tell him to just ask because I’m starting to get nervous. and here he goes

- I just wanted to understand what this dinner means to you, you know, if there is a second meaning behind.

stop. here is where I remind you, that HE did it ALL. he started everything, from the very beginning. My mind starts spinning around trying to see where I went wrong, where was the mistake, because really, the change was so abrupt that I had a neck-hake. so I ask him what it means a second meaning? of course we are not going out like after a match, (YOU HAVE BEEN FREAKING WRITNG ME FOR A WEEK FOR GODS SAKE), we are going out to get to know each other. why are you asking this?

- just wanted to clarify that I’m not looking for anything more than being friends really.

now, I must point out that I tend to vomit words when I’m upset (really? did I need to specify given what you are reading? no), and god, was I upset. he writes me, he asks me out, he organises and HE FRIEND-ZONES me even before we officially see each other for the first time. what the hell. so I send an audio that perfectly shows that I’m upset, tells him I have to go back to lesson, answer “ok” to a question I don't even read and proceed to ignore him.

I ask for the opinion of 4 girls, those people that are a jewel and I couldn’t live without them seriously so I have the desperate need to see what they think about it. all of the answer, in less mild tones: well, he is very much confused. add insult here and there. more or less everywhere. I love my friends.

but then my mum comes. I cannot hide a single thought from her. she just seed through, it’s always been like this. so I vomit again all the conversation, and what happens?

she hugs me and confronts me.

she starts telling me that I lash out, that I get angry and upset too easily, that I keep everyone out. the problem with my mother is that she tells the right things (it is true, I know my faults, they are plenty and these are certainly included and spot on) but she tells them in the wrong way. and she repeats the concept. and before I know it, I am crying, the ugly crying, because really, it was the last thing I wanted to do, and she goes on and on in listing out why I am wrong.

ten minutes after my mind is a circle of those faults, I just am damaged. I am a wrong girl, with a stone instead of a heart, with no kindness in my blood. let’s be clear, she didn't tell me this. but she told me those above, and these are just a natural continuation.

now you’re exaggerating, you’ll tell me. well, no, not really, because my last boyfriend was when I was 13, then high school started, I got fat, and I was wrong because of that. when I got less fat, I didn't want to go out, because obviously in my mind I was still too fat for that, so all the first three years of high school are out of the window. (for those not Italians, that means from 14 to 16/17). And she is always there, not telling me once that I was pretty. I was a teenager, my mind was a very dark place, I was surrounded by black.

By miracle, I came out of it, sort of, when I changed swimming group. there I met a guy that I had a crush on for two years straight. is it a crush if it lasts so long? I don’t think so, but I refuse to think it was more. so a crush it was. the problem is, when he leads you on, and then goes back. on, back. on, back. and one night, at two in the morning, he has the brilliant idea to inform you that he has a girlfriend. IN FREAKING TURKEY. he met her in Cambridge last summer, they were trying the long distance. not a chance, but here go two years of my life.

so hearing my mother saying those things, goodness did it hurt. I never cry. never. I can count the times I cried since I was 10 on one hand. three of them were because of my mother. fat, asocial, stone-hearted.

how did it end? we got out, had fun, nothing special but nothing unpleasant either, and since his request was “just friends” I bid him goodbye with my hand. you know the little emoji, that one.

the following morning doesn’t write, so for lunch, for the first time, I start, by asking him if he’s alive. yes he is, struggling to get the hamburger to stay down, pretty busy. the end.

so here I am, three days after, in need to process everything, because really, I didn’t want him to be the asshole of may, but apparently he is. and now my mind feels a bit lighter, finally, even with finals coming up and the fight with my mother still in the air.

I am damaged, I know I am. my family history for what concerns relationship has very few success, a lot of failure, so I am quite resigned. but maybe I am still hoping (god knows how, because I certainly don’t) for someone to see something else, something more than a heart of stone. so if someone hears this wish, since my “name” is typing-dreams, please please please...

#vomiting words

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fandom-imagines-stories · 7 years

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Always You Three- Year One

Pairing: Fred Weasley/Oc

Warnings: None

Word Count:2645

Summery: Andromeda Malfoy was the pride of her family, that is, until she was sorted into Gryffindor. Who better than Fred and George Weasley to help her navigate five years of being shunned by her father? But when the Triwizard Tournament arrives, her father devises a plan and Andy is thrown into a world of deadly challenges, friendships becoming something more and dark family secrets.

“Hufflepuff!” The sorting hat shouted and the table decorated with yellow and black erupted with applause.

“Andromeda Malfoy.” Professor McGonagall called out my name and I straightened my robes. As I strode confidently up the steps, I could hear people scoffing and muttering amongst themselves. Everyone knew which house I was going to be in. Every person in my family had been in Slytherin during their years at Hogwarts, except for one, but no one ever talked about him.

I sat down on the stool and the professor placed the hat on my head. Before it even touched a single black hair on my head, it seemed to know its answer.

“Sl-” It silenced itself. “Now wait just a moment.” I swallowed. What did it mean wait? “You long to impress your family, but there is a certain spark within you that I simply cannot ignore.” These words were only heard by me for the tables were still alive with anticipation and chatter. “Indeed, you would thrive in Slytherin, but even now, as you hope to live up to your family’s name, you know that you have always been different. But where to place you? You are quick witted and you excel in studies, but you are also loyal, no matter what your family’s past. I can tell that you will stand up for what you believe is right, and though you are afraid, you will even stand against those you love, which is a great act of courage.”

“Get on with it!” A student shouted receiving a fit of giggles, but a cold glare from McGonagall.

“Gryffindor!” The hat’s voice rang through the hall and the room went silent. My heart plummeted. There must be some mistake. I am Andromeda Malfoy, a well raised pure blood. I was born to be a Slytherin. McGonagall, seeming shocked herself, ushered me off the stool and called up the next first year. No one cheered as I cautiously walked to the Gryffindor table. The only sound was the light clapping from the head table.I lifted my eyes from the ground and saw Headmaster Dumbledore smiling at me, his gaze wise, yet curious. When I found a seat, the other students gave me a look and quickly scooted away. I held my head up, pretending I didn’t need their approval.

Later that night, I read a letter from my mom, realizing that she would want to know what house I got into even though she shouldn’t have to ask. I should have been sitting in the Slytherin common room, snickering with other Pure Bloods. Instead, I sat sniveling in front of the fire while everyone else was asleep. Or I had thought they were all asleep.

“Crying on the first day?” Exclaimed a voice.

“Bad sign.” Responded another. I turned to see a red headed boy sitting next to me.

“Definitely.” I glanced to my other side, gasping as I found the same boy. They both laughed.

“Twins.” I grumbled. I looked over both of them. “Ginger, musty old robes: you two must be Weasleys.”

“Snobbish.” One remarked.

“Robes in pristine condition.” The other noted. “Aha! You must be a Malfoy.”

“My father told me to stay away from your sort.” I said in a tone that made me realize why they thought I was snobbish.

“Your family and our family don’t get along.” The boy on my right explained. “I’m Fred by the way. That’s George.”

“I’m Andromeda.” I announced proudly, wiping away the wetness on my cheeks. Fred snickered. “What?”

“Nothing. It’s just a long, Malfoyish name.”

“Well…” I thought for a moment and remembered the name Draco used to call me when he was young and couldn’t pronounce my name. “How about Andy?”

“I like it.” The twins nodded in agreement.

“Okay Andy,” George started, his expression softening. “Why are you crying?”

“Oh… I just- I have to tell my parents I got sorted into Gryffindor.”

“What’s so bad about that?” Fred wondered.

“Every member of my family was sorted into Slytherin except for one, and he’s in Azkaban.”

“Well if it makes you feel better, almost everyone in your family is in Azkaban.” George joke and Fred kicked him. “Ow! What was that for?” I giggled.

“What are you two doing out here anyway. Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

“George and I like to think we’re nocturnal.” Fred grinned.

“Pranks are fun during the day, but it’s at night when the real fun happens.” George added, rubbing his shin.

“We should probably get to bed.” I glanced toward the clock.

“See you tomorrow?” Fred asked.

“I won’t tell my parents if you don’t tell yours.” I grinned mischievously. They both smiled and answered at the same time.

“Deal.”

* * *

The chaos that ensued in the next few weeks was more than I had expected when I became friends with the twins, but it was just as perfect as I had hoped. They always made me laugh, trying especially hard to cheer me up when my mother said that my father might be ‘to busy’ to write me at school. Even my younger brother Draco stopped writing me letters. At first I was devastated, but the twins often encouraged me that I was brave in writing them myself that I was in Gryffindor and they said that if my family couldn’t see how wonderful I was then it was their loss. This didn’t completely make me feel better, but it did help.

Their first big plan for the year, was to break into the horribly stiff Mr. Filch’s office and see what he had collected from students over the years. I, of course, was skeptical, knowing that if we got caught, everyone would know that we were friends. But they insisted that I come with them, it would be like some kind of initiation into their two-member club.

We started after the sun had gone down and everyone, including the twin’s overly pompous brother Percy, had gone to sleep. Lee Jordan, Fred and George’s other best friend, also came along, more than willing to be the distraction to get Filch away of his office.

“So here’s the plan,” Fred whispered, laying out a small map they had drawn. “Lee will go to the library, and open the screaming book in the restricted section.”

“How do you know that there’s a screaming book in the restricted section?” I wondered. “Don’t you need a teacher’s note to get in?” I almost said; “Don’t be dense. You can’t get into the restricted section without a teacher’s permission. And you couldn’t possibly have gotten that.” But then I remembered that I was trying not to be a total prat now a days.

“Ah, young, innocent Andy, you have so much to learn.” George sighed playfully.

“We broke in on the second night.” Fred answered. “Looked around a bit- found some pretty interesting things.”

“I’ll go and make a ruckus, making sure Filch will be one the other side of the castle when you get in his office.” Lee chimed.

“While Filch is in the library, we’ll get to his office from this corridor.” George pointed to a hallway on the map. “The three of us will look around and take anything worth taking.”

The four of us snuck out of the common room and down the hall, Lee going in the opposite direction.

“Don’t forget to get out of there before you can get caught, or you’ll get detention for a week.” George warned.

“I know. I’ll see you guys back in the common room.” Lee grinned before continuing toward the library. Fred, George, and I made our way around the castle, checking every corner in case Filch or another teacher was patrolling. Soon, we found Filch’s office, but halted at the sound of an angry meow.

“Mrs. Norris!” I exclaimed in a whisper. She scurried off. “I hate that cat.”

“We better hurry before she brings Filch back.” Fred turned to the door and tried to open it, but it was locked. I sighed and pointed my wand at the lock.

“Alohomora.” The lock clicked and opened. The office was cluttered, despite Filch being a neat-freak. A large trunk sat behind the desk, with a large lock on the front. I tried the spell again, but nothing happened.

“There must be an enchantment on it.” I groaned, defeated. “We better get back to the common room.”

“Or….” Fred’s eyes sparkled and I knew he was going to say something I would regret. “We could wait for Filch to get back and get the key.”

“Are you crazy?” I almost shouted. “If Filch comes back, they’ll send a letter to our parents, and I can’t get in trouble.”

“If you want to go back, go ahead. But there’s gotta be some good stuff in here if he had it enchanted.” I thought for a moment, and for some reason, my curious side over powered my logical.

“Fine, we’ll wait.”

“Fred, go be look out, I’ll find somewhere for us to hide, and Andy look around and see if there’s a slight chance he left the key in here.” George began to search the room for any dark corners or tables to hide under. I rummaged through the desk until I came across a large piece of blank parchment.

“Hey George… why would Filch keep an old piece of paper?” I questioned.

“I don’t know, but that looks like a map.”

“A map with nothing on it?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Or a map that can only be revealed with magic.” He tapped his wand to the paper.

“Mr. Prongs would like to advise amateurs like the Weasley twins and especially a Malfoy to leave the pranks and raiding to the professionals.” I read out loud. “It’s just some stupid paper made to insult people.”

“No, it’s a map. Whoever this Prongs was must have put a spell on it.” George concluded. “There must be a password or something.” Fred peaked his head in the door.

“You two better hurry up. I can hear footsteps.”

“We’ll just have to settle with this.” I put the paper in my robe pocket and pulled George behind me.

“But we didn’t open the chest.” He whined.

“We’ll have plenty to do while we try to figure out how to use the map, now let’s go!” Fred ran behind us as soon as we could hear Filch’s shouts. We ran through the dark halls and up the moving staircases until we lost the strict caretaker. We found the fat lady’s portrait and said the password, and despite her sleepy protests she let us through.

“I don’t know about you two, but I’m exhausted. I’m going to bed.” I took the paper out of my pocket and handed it to them.

“You’re not going to help figure out the password?” Fred looked at me with his big brown eyes and pouted.

“Did you guys find anything?” Lee asked sleepily from the couch.

“The trunk was locked and Mrs. Norris found Filch before we could get it open.” Fred lied.

“That’s too bad. I’ll be in bed if any of you need me.” Lee shuffled upstairs and I began to follow him.

“Why didn’t you tell him about the map?” I wondered.

“It’ll be our secret.” Fred smirked. I smiled and went up the stairs and dreamed of mischievous red heads.

That school year I learned how to levitate a feather and how to make a cure for boils, but none of that compared to what I learned from Fred and George. They taught me that some rules are meant to be broken and that being a Pure Blood wasn’t really anything to be proud of. Instead, I took pride in getting the best score of my class in potions. Professor Snape even seemed to like me.

During the year, about a month after we found the mysterious map, Fred and George were taking guesses of the password, and the map seemed to be helping them figure it out by lighting up whenever they were getting closer to the answer, they used the right set of words and the Marauder’s Map revealed itself, showing the entire grounds of Hogwarts including secret passage ways that we often used to get around. It also showed everyone in Hogwarts, with their names and a pair of footprints that moved as the person moved. It helped us know where Filch was and which route to take to avoid him. With the map’s help, we only ever got caught twice throughout the school year. Like the time we enchanted some of Professor McGonagall’s books to soar across the room and land on the Slytherins. We got two weeks of detention, but luckily she didn’t write to my parents.

But as the year came to an end, I realized that I would be going home to a family that was disgusted by me. As the train moved forward through the vast valleys, Fred and George joked around with Lee, and I would fake a smile whenever they talked to me, trying to hide the tears brimming my eyes.

“Hey,” Fred tilted his head so he could see my face, “It’s going to be okay. George and I will write every week.” I shook my head.

“We can’t write.” I said sadly. “ It’s too much of a risk, someone will read them.”

“Well I can’t go the entire holiday without talking to you. We’ll just… come up with code names.” Fred got out a piece of paper and began to brainstorm. “We can be just like the Marauders.” We all thought for a moment.

“Well it has to do with animals if we are going to be our own Marauders.” I pointed out.

“What about bird brain over here.” George pointed at Fred and Fred threw the quill at him.

“Well, what about Little Red for our little fox?” Fred suggested, looking at me.

“Where’d you get fox?” I wondered.

“You’re sneaky.” George noted. “Remember the time when you snuck into Hogsmeade right under Professor McGonagall's nose?”

“And you’re one of the wittiest people I know.” Fred added. “Besides the two of us, of course.” I punched his shoulder.

“So it’s decided. Little Red it is.” George concluded, writing down the name next to mine.

“Now what about you two cackling hyenas?” I joked.

“Hyena,” Fred mused, “I like that. How about-” The train jerked to a stop.

“Hold that thought,” I said, standing up. “I should get out of here before Percy shows up.”

“What about our names?” They asked at the same time.

“You’ll think of something.” I gave them a smile and hurried out of the compartment. I pushed passed as I exited the train and made it onto the platform. I searched through the crowd of people, looking for familiar heads of light blonde hair.

“M-miss Andromeda?” A small voice said from behind me. I turned to find Dobby, our house elf, standing timidly between a group of students.

“Dobby?” I exclaimed. “What are you doing here? Where’s mom and dad?”

“Y-your father sent me to pick you up miss.” I froze.

“H-he what?” I stuttered. I hoped at least after an entire school year, my father would want to see me when I got back.

“He said he had business at the ministry to attend to.” Dobby seemed to notice the tears. “You’re mother s-said she wanted nothing more than to see you when you got back, but you’re father insisted she go with him.” I sniffed and nodded.

“Of course. He must be extremely-” My voice cracked and I held back a sob. Dobby reached up and took my hand.

“Let’s get you home miss.” He said sadly. I wiped the tears off my cheeks and held my head up high… just like a Malfoy.

#fred weasley #the twins #originalcharacter #malfoy #harry potter #hogwarts #george weasley

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recentanimenews · 5 years

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A Beginner's Guide To Dragon Ball

What is your great shame as an anime fan? What show has absolutely everyone seen but you? What titles in your backlog do you scroll over thinking you’ll watch it someday but never do? What series has your continued hesitance to engage with developed into an elitist disdain for? What colossal, inescapable anime will you never EVER watch?

Hello, my name is Danni, and I’ve never seen a single episode of Dragon Ball.

Let me explain myself. Growing up, there were few shows my siblings and I were allowed to watch on TV. It’s not just Dragon Ball Z that I missed out on. Name your favorite childhood show and I’ve probably never seen it. I did end up falling deep into the anime hole in my teen years, but I developed a habit of only watching short anime. My backlog was (and still is) massive, so I stuck to shows I could knock out in under a week. If it ran more than two seasons, I just didn’t have time for it.

Lately, though, I’ve started to change my tune. I’ve been watching JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure since season one and got pretty deep into My Hero Academia last year. I’ve had a pretty snobbish attitude towards shonen anime for awhile now, but I think I’m starting to see the appeal. I could start watching Naruto...nah, maybe another time.

Come to think of it, Dragon Ball Super ended pretty recently, didn’t it? I feel like everyone I know was freaking out about that final battle. I’ve also had this Dragon Ball FighterZ game for a month now, and it’s actually really cool. I know I’ve always thought that Dragon Ball Z can’t possibly be as good as it is long, but maybe it’s time I gave it a fair shot.

It’s settled then. I’ll try watching Dragon Ball Z. My favorite characters in FighterZ are from Super, so I guess I should watch that, too. Isn’t there also an anime that comes before Z? I hate starting a series from the middle, so I’ll watch that, too. How many episodes is that in total? 575? Great, this is gonna take me like six years or something. Ah well. I can always slip into the Hyperbolic Time Chamber to watch them. I don’t know what that is yet, but I’m sure I’ll find out soon. See you all in a year!

Wow, what a year! It’s been so long since I wrote all that other stuff before. That definitely wasn’t all a bit I just wrote because I hadn’t started writing for Crunchyroll a year ago. It’s been a whole eleven months since I started watching Dragon Ball, and it’s been about three weeks since I finished Super just in time to catch the new movie. I’m living in a post-Dragon Ball world now, and there’s a Goku-shaped hole in my heart that I don’t know how to fill. I have a deeper appreciation for this series now than I ever expected to have, and I’ve been itching to tell you all about it.

What can I say about Dragon Ball that hasn’t already been said, though? Surely its legions of fans don’t need me to tell them what they already know. Then I realized something. I can’t be the only one who hadn’t seen it. Somewhere, somehow, someone out there right now has yet to experience for themselves the joys of Toei’s crowning achievement. They’re probably sitting there right now asking themselves why they should watch it now after so long. Their thoughts might be clogged with preconceived notions about the series that couldn’t be further from the truth. Mine were. I’d like to right that wrong, so I’ve compiled a list of seven things I didn’t know until I saw for myself. This is the beginner’s guide to watching Dragon Ball.

It’s perfect for binge-watching

The biggest lie you’ll ever hear about Dragon Ball from both fans and critics alike is that there are long stretches of episodes full of attacks charging and nothing else. It was something I had always heard about the show and was warned about when I decided to check it out. I waited and waited for these fabled episodes and by the end of DBZ, I realized they don’t exist (Before you ask, no, I wasn’t watching Kai). To be fair, there are times in the show when a character needs to spend most or all of an episode charging an attack. This isn’t near as boring as it sounds, though, as there is always a battle taking place to defend that character and usually a B plot to cut away to.

Climactic battles do tend to drag on a lot in Dragon Ball, I’ll admit. So if you were a kid only able to watch at the pace of one episode a week, it would sure feel like nothing was happening. I watched the entire series at an average pace of almost two episodes a day, and that made all the difference. I was able to see battles play out over a few hours rather than a few months. If it ever got dull (which it did sometimes), I could just leave it on in the background and listen to some legendary voices shout at each other while browsing Twitter or playing on my Switch. Most of the time, though, my eyes were glued to the screen, anxious to see what would happen next.

It’s actually about martial arts

I’m honestly a little embarrassed that I didn’t already know this. My second-hand exposure to Dragon Ball had only ever shown me clips and images of people flying around shooting energy beams and fireballs at each other. It wasn’t until I saw FighterZ gameplay in action that I realized there’s hand-to-hand combat in the show, and it took watching the original series for me to learn it’s the whole dang focus. In fact, a large chunk of the series’ sagas take place in or under the guise of a worldwide martial arts tournament, most of which can be found in the original series. Speaking of which…

You can skip the original series, but you should still give it a shot

Everyone I know thought I was crazy for not simply starting with Z. I thought I was crazy for not starting with Z. I had been told over and over again that everything that needed to be explained from it eventually gets explained in its sequel. I had been warned countless times that it’s so far apart from what it eventually becomes. I knew all this, but I just couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d be missing part of the story if I skipped it. So, I took the plunge. Now, eleven months later, I’m here to tell you that, yeah, you don’t need it to watch Z and Super, but you should still watch it anyway.

The thing that will surprise you most about Dragon Ball is that it isn’t an action series yet -- it’s an adventure series. Loosely inspired by the classic adventure novel Journey to the West, the original series largely revolves around a young Goku’s quests to retrieve the seven Dragon Balls that can (presumably) grant any wish when brought together. Along the way, he encounters a series of villains who all seek the Dragon Balls for some nefarious reason, and Goku takes it on himself to stop them.

Admittedly, the original series takes awhile to get going. It’s incredibly dated in some of the worst ways, making the first half of the series a bit of a slog to get through. Still, though, it features the first World Martial Arts Tournament saga, which offered me my first glimpses at Dragon Ball’s potential. The latter half of the series kicks off with its second tournament arc, aka the Tien Shinhan saga, aka the moment I finally fell in love with Dragon Ball. It’s here that Dragon Ball offered it’s best action and most compelling characters to date in the show. It still sits as my personal favorite tournament arc in the series. Dragon Ball manages to keep the momentum rolling with great arc after great arc as it launches itself straight into Z. It has its fair share of flaws and isn’t altogether necessary, but it’s absolutely still worth your time.

The titular Dragon Balls aren’t lost for long

So when Dragon Ball’s first episode ended with Goku and Bulma beginning their quest to find all seven Dragon Balls, I got a little antsy. I asked, “Is this gonna be like One Piece where they’re gonna need over a thousand episodes just to find the Dragon Balls?” Turns out I was about 987+ episodes short on my guess there. It really doesn’t take them long at all to find Dragon Balls and make their wish, even if it doesn’t exactly go as planned.

Every time the Dragon Balls are used, they disappear for a full year. This means that most of Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z’s first sagas bounce back and forth between quests to find them and killing time until they can be used again. At some point in Z, though, the goal posts shift to a point where obtaining the Dragon Balls becomes completely trivial and they merely act as macguffins for resurrecting dead cast members.

Power levels don’t actually matter

If you’ve existed on the internet at all within the last decade and a half, you’ve likely seen the most popular Dragon Ball meme over nine-thousand times already. Between all the memes and chatter from fans, I learned about Dragon Ball’s power levels long before I ever saw them in action. Everyone has a power level and if your power level is lower than someone else’s, you’re guaranteed to lose. At least, that’s what I thought. As it turns out, power levels don’t actually mean that much in the grand scope of Dragon Ball.

They’re first introduced in the very first episode of DBZ supposedly with the rules I listed until Goku surprises everyone by actually raising his power level. The first few sagas in DBZ are filled with villains boasting about their power levels only to somehow be defeated by someone whose power level had been lower just moments ago. It doesn’t even take Goku half the series to defeat the highest power level in the universe, at which point the term has already become meaningless.

Super nullifies the concept even further by bringing back characters whose powers had long since been eclipsed and making them legitimate contenders. I wish someone had cleared this up for me much sooner. I had always figured that Dragon Ball fights were done deals where the highest power level always won. Who wants to watch a battle anime where the underdog never wins? Thankfully, Dragon Ball is all about the underdogs.

Goku is pretty cool

The hero of the story is cool. Big shocker, I know, but bear with me. If you only know Goku through clips of him fighting, of course it makes sense that he’s cool. However, once you actually start watching Dragon Ball, you kind of forget all about it, because he’s a massive goofball 99% of the time. He’s a dork from the countryside who only ever thinks about eating and fighting and doesn’t know what a kiss is despite having two sons and a granddaughter. He’s childish and naive, but when the chips are down and he gets serious, he gets serious. It rules every single time.

Get this, Dragon Ball is really good

Like, really really good. Don’t get me wrong, I had hoped to appreciate Dragon Ball when I first began watching it, but I never expected to fall this deeply in love with it. I spent nearly a full year watching every single episode of this series -- a series I had never intended to watch before. I spent literal hundreds of hours of my year bonding with Goku and his pals, and it hasn’t even been a month and I already wanna do it all over again.

Dragon Ball is a monolithic, world-renowned series for a reason, and that reason is because it’s freaking GOOD. Its cast is iconic, its art style is timeless, its action is to die for, and it only gets better and better as it goes on. Seriously, it’s been more than three decades since the show began and it’s still blowing minds at the box office. It isn’t a series that rests on its laurels and name recognition alone, it constantly one-ups itself with every iteration.

I know, there probably aren’t many of you out there who haven’t seen Dragon Ball and thus most of you won’t find this article very useful. That doesn’t matter to me right now. Because I know I’m not alone. I know there are people out there just like I used to be who at best think they don’t have time for Dragon Ball and at worst think it’s somehow beneath them. Even if there are only twelve people like that out there, I want all twelve of them to read this piece and rethink their prior misconceptions.

If that doesn’t apply to you, yet you’re still with me anyway, first of all, thank you. Second of all, I want you to think of the Dragon Ball in your life. What show do you think you don’t have the time for? What show do you think isn’t worth your time? If you’ve learned anything from me today, I want it to be this: that show might be your next favorite. You’ll never know until you sit down and watch it.

Are you a lifelong fan of Dragon Ball? A relative newcomer like Danni? Did you not even know it existed before? Let us know in the comments below!

-----

Danni Wilmoth is a Features and Social Videos writer for Crunchyroll and also co-hosts the video game podcast Indiecent. You can find more words from her on Twitter @NanamisEgg.

Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

By: [email protected]

#Anime #News #Latest in Anime News by Crunchyroll!

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