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mbat · 5 months

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before i pass out for the night. since my brain is back on dan and phil as if its 2016 or something i need to put this out into the world. this isnt some sort of important life changing post, just a personal funny thing

so when i was 13 and fixating on dan and phil, i read a lot of fanfics. like, i guarantee that even after all these years that, if i had the statistics, that fandom was the one i read the most fanfics for and constantly. i couldnt tell you what nearly any of them were about, and i have a feeling that many of them are probably lost to time by now. i also dont know if i need to mention that yeah, a lot of them were shipping, and yes ive long grown out of that. (the dnp fandom is actually what made me grow out of that)

anyway all this to say that over the last 6 years after i stopped fixating on dan and phil, one fanfic stuck with me and i just. i think about it every once in a while. its been over half a decade. it wasnt a groundbreaking fic, i dont remember any quotes or specifics, just the premise as of at least the first few chapters. idk why it stuck with me

it was literally a fic about. if the world had gotten to a point where almost every child was born as like, a science baby instead of a natural baby, and phil was a science baby, but dan was a natural baby. and there was somehow this like, thing where the science babies would bully the natural babies for some reason idek, and this was a highschool setting and i think dan was a new kid in school. and what gets me about the fic is that dan was some small shy scared kid and phil was some mean jerk bully. and how wild that is compared to how they are in real life

this isnt me trying to find the fic or the person who wrote it or any of that, this is literally just. i remember this fic at least once every few months and i needed to get it out of my brain somewhere

#there are few fics that i remember several years after i read them the first time. this is one of them #depressingly. some of the fics that are on that list are most definitely gone by now #there was one in the vt fandom i still think about 6 years later that i loved. but the person who wrote it hated it :[#the others that are on that list off the top of my head are the hlvrai mermaid fic and the hlvrai alien weed fic #my brain latches onto the most random fics to remember forever lol #my post #dan and phil #<- tagging for blog purposes. not because i want people to see this #if you see this post. good for you i guess ajfjshd #bur seriously if you know the fic/author of what im talking about. i mean itd be neat to find it again. but dont bother them yknow #its also wild how thats like. such a dystopian novel premise. not in a bad way just a neutral way #i love the premises that people come up with for fanfiction. like. ANYTHING can be a fanfic premise and i find that so magical #i had a fanfic premise that was originally meant to be a dnp fanfic that ive long since changed to be an original thing lol #and its... a weird premise lol. at least i think so #anyway since this is the bottom of the tags and no ones going to read this. i gotta say i have so many thoughts on dnp fanfic culture #and my personal relationship with it which i think. my personal relationship with it was heavily influenced by me being like.#transmasc + mlm but not knowing either yet and how wild that is to look back on #its why i love that one meme pic thats like. 'straight girls who fetishize mlm look like this in 5 years' and it shows a pic of jessie #jessie from breaking bad sorry the tag length ran out #but anyway im not gonna make full posts about that. just wanted to mention it somewhere lol

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cherry-shipping · 6 months

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i love my friends selfships........... sorry im wine drunk as fuck so im all kinds of mushy rn. but anyway sincerely honestly truly i love my friends selfhsips so anyway if youre my friend ACTUALLY not even my friend just a person in general. and you ever EVER!!!!!!!!!!! want to gush about your f/os or talks baout your s/i lore. god god god i cant even begin to describe how happy that woud make me. if i dont know who the f/o is i cant give you much about personal interpretations/headcanons but it still makes my stupid lame ass day to hear about them.......... so anyway. sorry for being a loser ive just always loved selfshipping and self inserts

#as a kid i would make self inserts for all the kids in my class if they asked............... like really #i had a friend in middle school (never had more than 1 at a time) and we had a comic together #where i drew us as candies..?? or something ? and anyway it was popular in our grade and sometimes people would ask for me to make them #characters in the comic as well #and it made me so happy. i made one person have an intereat in a game called socker which means sugar in my language BUT also sounds like #soccer which is what he liked doing during recess....... can u believe how clever that is for a 9 year old. i was wildin back then tbh #anyway. i just love self inserts and selfshipping Maybe mor ethan anythnig in the fucking world TBH. and my friends are swag too #cherry chats #grargh. if u want me 2 tag alcohol just lmk LOL #and for the record if any american is reading this or anyone from any other country where the legal drinking age is higher than mine.....#i swear to god im old enough to drink. im committing 0 crimes right now. or like 0 alcohol related crimes i guess #im pirating music...........?? if that counts?????#wah. i forgof what im talking about . sorry LMFAOOOO

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firendgold · 9 months

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Since I saw that you're doing the violence ask game can you answer 22, 25 and 7??

I sure can.~

This one got long af though, so another readmore.

(still choosing violence)

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

This is another one I've answered already, but tbf... it was yesterday. So I can pull my second favorite part of canon instead so you don't have to re-read an older answer.

There's two moments that tie: one in year 5 and one in year 6. Year 5's moment is a nice warm-and-fuzzy "the trio are such good friends" scene, in the midst of Umbridge torturing Harry with her quill:

It was nearly midnight when Harry left Umbridge’s office that night, his hand now bleeding so severely that it was staining the scarf he had wrapped around it. He expected the common room to be empty when he returned, but Ron and Hermione had sat up waiting for him. He was pleased to see them, especially as Hermione was disposed to be sympathetic rather than critical. “Here,” she said anxiously, pushing a small bowl of yellow liquid toward him, “soak your hand in that, it’s a solution of strained and pickled murtlap tentacles, it should help.” Harry placed his bleeding, aching hand into the bowl and experienced a wonderful feeling of relief. Crookshanks curled around his legs, purring loudly, and then leapt into his lap and settled down. “Thanks,” he said gratefully, scratching behind Crookshanks’s ears with his left hand. “I still reckon you should complain about this,” said Ron in a low voice. “No,” said Harry flatly. “McGonagall would go nuts if she knew—” “Yeah, she probably would,” said Harry. “And how long d’you reckon it’d take Umbridge to pass another Decree saying anyone who complains about the High Inquisitor gets sacked immediately?” Ron opened his mouth to retort but nothing came out and after a moment he closed it again in a defeated sort of way. “She’s an awful woman,” said Hermione in a small voice. “Awful. You know, I was just saying to Ron when you came in . . . we’ve got to do something about her.” “I suggested poison,” said Ron grimly.

Just seeing the trio bounce off each other is soothing (especially after reading days or weeks worth of fanfics where they all suddenly hate each other or were never really that good of friends or whatever). Harry's gratitude and stubbornness, Hermione's caretaking and forethought and plotting, Ron's voice of reason and necessary dash of humor... all perfect. Also, just... Harry is so used to going things alone, toughing things out by himself. It's heartwarming and sad that he still doesn't expect Ron and Hermione to do something as simple as waiting up for him to get back from hellish detention. Also also: Crookshanks curling up with him. ^^

Year 6's moment is just between Harry and Hermione:

Hermione stopped dead; Harry had heard it too. Somebody had moved close behind them among the dark bookshelves. They waited and a moment later the vulture-like countenance of Madam Pince appeared round the corner, her sunken cheeks, her skin like parchment and her long hooked nose illuminated unflatteringly by the lamp she was carrying. ‘The library is now closed,’ she said. ‘Mind you return anything you have borrowed to the correct – what have you been doing to that book, you depraved boy?’ ‘It isn’t the library’s, it’s mine!’ said Harry hastily, snatching his copy of Advanced Potion-Making off the table as she lunged at it with a clawlike hand. ‘Despoiled!’ she hissed. ‘Desecrated! Befouled!’ ‘It’s just a book that’s been written in!’ said Harry, tugging it out of her grip. She looked as though she might have a seizure; Hermione, who had hastily packed her things, grabbed Harry by the arm and frogmarched him away. ‘She’ll ban you from the library if you’re not careful. Why did you have to bring that stupid book?’ ‘It’s not my fault she’s barking mad, Hermione. Or d’you think she overheard you being rude about Filch? I’ve always thought there might be something going on between them …’ ‘Oh, ha, ha …’ Enjoying the fact that they could speak normally again, they made their way along the deserted, lamplit corridors back to the common room, arguing about whether or not Filch and Madam Pince were secretly in love with each other.

Very, very cute scene showing Harry and Hermione getting along casually, something we're not often treated to even in canon. A frankly disturbing amount of fans (particularly fans of A Specific Ship I Will Not Mention Here) have bought into the propaganda that Harry and Hermione aren't really that good of friends just because during GOF, when he'd just experienced his first ever schism with a close friend, Harry privately confessed to missing Ron and enjoying the things he did with his male best friend more. The trio is not "Harry and Ron, then Ron and Hermione". It's "Harry, Ron, and Hermione"; all three of them are necessary pieces of the whole. Harry and Hermione's friendship is different than Harry's with Ron, but it's no less valuable, and not any weaker, or else Hermione wouldn't have stayed in that damned tent.

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

Every bit of discourse about Sirius not getting a trial. We know. The injustice is the point. The cruelty is the point. The POINT is to show that wizarding Britain is glitz and glamor and not all that fair to its marginalized peoples and underclass, you nimrods. Frankly, the fanfics that purport to 'fix' it by giving Sirius his "restored Lordship" or a bunch of seats on the Wizengamot or immediate "wizarding guardianship" over Harry or some unnamed hot babes for him to fuck on or off-screen are very... shallow and unsatisfying. Either that or they give him a bunch of money, though this would at least be on brand for the Ministry. But like... yeah. I'm tired of this complaint always going in the same direction and not being a gateway to Greater Commentary On The Series and the World. Because it's not like Sirius and/or Harry become the type of people who rebel against this ideology. If anything, they embrace the pureblood nonsense in a lot of these fics and are just mad that Sirius was the target that one time. Gaaaah.

And, and. Every bit of discourse about Dumbledore leaving Harry at the Dursleys and/or the sacrificial lamb throwaway line by Snape, especially because 99.9% of people discussing it either haven't read the books, haven't read them since the first time and desperately need a re-read, have only seen the movies, are parroting opinions from some other wrong person on the internet, are all read-up but blatantly ignoring what Dumbledore and Harry say (and don't say) over what they THINK they mean, or some other lovely form of ignorance that leads to the same long-debunked takes being re-introduced as GASP-DID-YOU-EVER-CONSIDER soundbites over and over and over and OVER again. I'm so sick of it.

I get it, JKR's a TERF, you don't want to re-engage with her work, and you don't have to. You don't have to give her any more money. Hell, you shouldn't, ever again. But please, fucking make sure your knowledge is correct and not fandom telephone when it comes to Harry's childhood and Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. I'm not-even-lowkey sick of some of y'all at this point.

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because of how the fandom acts about them?

I... don't have an immediate answer for this, so I'm going to have to think about it. To you it's only going to take me one line, but for me it'll actually be like... an evening or something.

...

Okay.

This is difficult because (to use the exact terminology) I can't think of a character I've come to hate because of how the fandom acts about them. I definitely have characters whose most popular fanon versions are so irritating or repulsive that it has caused me to look more critically on the real versions of them, though. I guess maybe I'll list those here.

Fleur came to mind first. She seems (and can be) very shallow and haughty in canon at first, but shows compassion and hidden depths in all three of her appearances. She has some veela hair in her wand from her grandmother, and a deep devotion for her younger sister. However... many fanfics (especially harem fanfics or flowerpot fanfics) paint her as either this femme fatale who uses her "veela allure" at will and Cannot Fathom the idea of a man who can resist her (and is thus more vulnerable to falling in love with such a man) or as a super-powerful witch whose family is basically running Magical France (since of course, she is the only French character we know, so why wouldn't she be the most influential person there? /s). Basically, the "foreign" version of what people do to fanon Daphne Greengrass. Ironically, the best fanfic portrayals of Fleur I've seen are the ones that keep her shipped with Bill (with a few flowerpot exceptions, see A Beautiful Lie by MaybeMayba as the prime example), or ship her with Hermione or Ginny... which is sad because I love me some ship variety. (And I still think Bill/Tonks would've been rad as hell.) So I don't dislike canon Fleur, but fanon's "over-attention" to that possible veela heritage and the weird implication that Harry was just "forced" not to notice this perfect woman in his life, rather than just noticing her beauty and not being interested, rubs me the wrong way and disinclines me from including her in many of my own works.

The Bones family is next. Yes, both Amelia and Susan. Susan isn't as bad (I think she has... two lines in Order of the Phoenix? maybe?), but as with most "mostly undefined" HP girls, the personality the fandom has given her (the super sweet politically-savvy Hufflepuff girlfriend of "just do independent!Harry with Lordships and pro-Ministry propaganda and plenty of Wizengamot meetings between Hogwarts classes") is one I've seen so many times it has come to negatively affect my view of the real girl, even though I think the way she calls Amelia "auntie" in canon is adorable. As for Amelia, fanon likes to make her either the Only Sane Man in the Ministry or the leader of the sane faction, who magically is able to fix or ignore all the corruption in said Ministry and can railroad through whatever decisions Harry needs done once he needs to Do Political or Pureblood Stuff Outside of Hogwarts--provided, of course, he's been nice enough to Susan recently.

The closest actual answer to this question I have is Tom Riddle. I didn't like him in canon by any means--I'd probably say I was neutral toward him, just seeing him as "the young Voldemort before he did his magical girl transformation". But fanon kind of acts like he and Voldemort are... two different people? There's these pervasive ideas that either Tom could've been "saved" if Certain People Just Did More (to stop him sneaking around and bullying and murdering???), or that Tom wasn't really so bad when he was gathering up supporters, murdering his family members and the few people who trusted him, and generally going around Becoming the Dark Lord--it was just when he made the switch that he became bad. And like... no. I can't buy that. Even in fanfic, I can't get fully behind the idea of a sane Tom Riddle who was Doing Good until he got sidetracked Oh Nooo. He wasn't. I believe Voldemort was saner before he tried to kill a baby and it backfired, but I don't think there was ever a point where he could have been saved. At every fork he made the wrong decision--to soothe his ego, to feel powerful, to feel special, to feel better than others and make them feel that way too. Tom Riddle's a prick. If anything, we should've seen him squirm a little more before he died.

The last one stings, because it's a character I adore: Hermione. Hermione is a very polarizing figure in canon and always has been, I get it. But what particularly hurts me about her fanon portrayals is that they are VERY SELDOM accurate, or even balanced. Either the author sees her as Their Wife and so she is perfect and never does any wrong and basically becomes the main character of the fic (even if she is not actually the main character), or they overinflate her flaws and use it as a reason to hate on her and bash her to oblivion. There's rarely an in-between. I'm not sure which one is worse. If you held my feet to the fire, I might say the former because a character without any flaws or one who takes over the entire narrative and doesn't let other characters breathe is not fucking interesting to me in the slightest.

This especially hurts because I am a huge Harmony fan and like 60% of bad Harmony fanfics are always the same fucking tropes/plotlines. Hermione is unironically referred to as The Brightest Witch of THE Age (incorrect, not what Remus said. he said "the brightest witch of your age I've ever met", basically meaning she's unusually smart for a fourteen year-old girl). She's treated like the next female Dumbledore who has all the answers (even about stuff she wouldn't know) and often guides Harry's every move.

And speaking of Dumbledore--the same girl who is supportive of him in canon and (after Harry) is MOST likely to recognize Dumbledore as a human who can make mistakes is ALWAYS turned into a Dumbledore Skeptic Who Has Been Suspicious of His Motives All Along, and who will do whatever it takes to get her boyfriend away from his manipulations... by taking manipulative!Dumbledore's place. That's right. This version of fanon Hermione ALWAYS becomes the same thing the author is supposedly railing against, because Harry becomes her mouthpiece, spends all his time with her to the exclusion of anyone else, and can't have a single meeting or meaningful scene with any other character unless she is also present.

Haphne fics do this too, but I swear they got it from bad Harmony fics and it makes me so mad. For once, I would love to read a Harmony fic where Dumbledore is portrayed accurately and both Harry AND Hermione are equal, independent partners who don't have panic attacks if separated for more than five minutes. Especially because as a child Hermione never struck me as the kind of person who even would get married or have a serious relationship distracting her from her Great Work!

But yeah. That last one hurts the most because I love Hermione as an individual, as the very important third of the trio, as a potential partner for Harry (though this isn't the right blog for that!), and just as an iconic character.

I... think that's all? Yep. Thanks~!

#kosondroom #thanks for the ask!#fireandgoldposts #the golden trio #ironically I try not to use that tag much but I need it here #Harry and Hermione #I'm sure you can guess which ship I was talking about. I'm sure the whole world could #genuinely begging fanon Sirius(es?) to actually start dismantling the corrupt pureblood politics instead of bending over for them #as I've said many times by now I reeeeally just want to read new and better ideas in fanfic #and my job is hella stressful I can't be out here writing all of them myself #I sound like such a ''my canon right or wrong'' person in most of these asks lol. in actuality I love ignoring Certain Large Swathes #I just find certain ascended fanon tropes/headcanons in the HP fandom in particular to be either boring or aggravating #and thus I would like them to go away once and for all or for us all to Grow Beyond Them #how many times do y'all think I've read incorrect Obscurial!Harry takes? take a wild guess. you won't be in the ballpark #actually if you are a sane fan side note do not go on Quora answers. it will piss you off every day #me as usual saying ''stop making up shit to be mad at Dumbledore about 2023 there's already enough in canon''#make HP girls more unique and complex 2k23 #I'm tired of reading the same OC girl but with a canon name and a different house tie #''she said boomerly'' lmao #this is making me want to either sit down and write another time travel fic or finally sit down and write a harmony #choose violence ask game

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sailforvalinor · 9 months

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#oohhh girlies in my phone I’m really in it now #I went to talk about this in the tags last night but then I rambled so much I HIT THE TAG LIMIT LOL #but um basically I got re-acquainted with a boy I was friends with when I was nine only to discover that I still have a crush on him???#MAYBE??? I DON’T KNOW????#I genuinely don’t know if I actually do or if I’m just thrilled to find a guy I can talk to like a normal person who doesn’t make me want #to dig a hole in the ground and hide (this is not a dig at the menfolk I’m just nervous around guys my age for some reason)#it’s such a rarity you know???#I just I don’t know aaaaaaaaaahh #I don’t often find people that I’m on the same wavelength with like that. like a kindred spirit thing #and like one thing is he IS a year and a half or so younger than me which is slightly awkward now but won’t be in even just a year or so #my family (in their usual fashion) have tossed him up to me as a potential option multiple times this week and I haven’t been as adverse as #I usually am to their suggestions so like. I think they can TELL haahahahhahahaha #like it doesn’t matter I guess because I’m going on an exchange program and I won’t see him again until next year anyway #but it’s been two days and I can’t stop thinking about it #also the other thing is I don’t have his number but my brother has it and like I’m not going to ask for it because a) my brother would make #fun of me relentlessly and also b) what would I even do with it I’m not that brave #I am perfectly content with just being friends for the moment but I don’t want to let that friendship atrophy in the whole year we don’t #see each other but!!! I’m too awkward!!!#but. anyway. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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sunbackeddog · 11 months

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I haven't drawn in literal years but the brain rot is making me so full of bees. Sketches I'm weirdly proud of below

#im not going to tag these but they're referenced from some rugby clubs #determinedjockeypress #even tho its not printmaking itll go under my print tag which is just gonna be a catchall for now #personal #i guess lol

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rubberbandballqueen · 11 months

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had one of them "quarterly work meetings" just now and what i have learned is that i am severely lacking in the genre of social script that dictates how to behave when first joining a group of people you will be working with regularly from that point on

#i think mostly my coworkers are all people who are fairly neurotypical and so they like. Know how to do this stuff i guess #n so i'm kinda just standing there. like a vampire. needing to be invited in for lack of practice w/these scripts #n like i briefly mentioned this in the tags of a post on my other blog yesterday but like i notice smth similar in my chem lab #it's like i'm missing the first scene of a script to a play but have the rest of it memorized blocked n ready to go #as Soon as i know that my entrance isn't like a disruption of the expected flow i'm fine!!! i can do that shit!!!!#and more recently i've been learning n mastering the opening scenes to the play of 'making online friends'#which is different from real life bc online friendship is asynchronous. realizing now that's why online/irl friendships differ sometimes #n this is also why i tend to be more actively inviting at the start of smth new like a class or semester #bc those are the periods when the ~flow~ is setting itself n if i can manage to integrate into *that* i'm good i can do this #but i don't know how to *slip in* to an existing current as an active participant. i just know how to observe n absorb #bc it's ~personal sharing time~ (lol) but like obviously being Neurodivergent(tm) i misread a lot of cues growing up #n so now the goal feels like 'transition seamlessly into thing so that you're not a despised disruption'#which is why i've become so grateful to the kinds of people who make active efforts to include new people #like. thank you communications majors. i love you communications majors. i owe you my life communications majors.#bc it's so!! 'i promise i'm not snubbing you it's just that my direct instructions were to work Here so even though you are three feet away #'literally on the other side of this wall i'm not gonna come out n initiate conversation w/you bc those are Implicit Instructions'#'/Individual Expectations that i'm too afraid of reading incorrectly but if you come talk to me i will be normal abt it i promise'#the worm speaks #like pretty frequently these days i find myself thinking abt that one post that's like #'yeah back in the olden days being a good host was a learned skill n it involved these sorts of specific things'#'like matching up n introducing guests to each other by saying 'this is x this is y you both like turtles :)'#like i feel like that's the Spirit of icebreakers these days but even if you have interests in common w/someone across the circle #it can be kind of awkward to cross the room afterwards to talk to them so you just end up talking w/whoever's nearest or no one at all

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szkicel · 1 month

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I’m working on a pinned post, where I want to include a short description for each of my major project so it’ll be easier to navigate my characters, bc a big shock - I also have projects that aren’t about bugs lol (tho you know damm well that I will try to implement them somehow anyway jhbdjhbd)

I thought about also mentioning minor projects that I have in the background and which aren’t that well developed yet, but ngl the list is literally like „a hamster metroidvania” or „dystopian central europe” bc they’re THAT underdeveloped, so I decided I’m not gonna bother unless you ppl will ask me to talk about it lol

#my posts #rambling #the few minor projects that are more developed past the one line summary I might just include under the major ones #bc while I do have a minor side project about a cozy postapo game and I don’ work on it actively right now #I did make a whole map for it with a lot of npcs and where they live and what each little town is like so…#I guess it deserves the same kind of mention as metalhero/stage heroes lol #what I do know is that I have 3 projects that I need to make before I die and the rest is also very nice but not as impactful #to me personally as these 3 (even if some of my „lesser” projects are as old as one major game project while definitely #older than my thesis which I only started working on in 2022)#ok this rant in the tags is probably incomprehensible to anyone else who isn’t me anyway so i’ll stop lmao

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the-100th-witch · 6 months

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Bloop just me rambling about my life

im driving 2 hrs away tomorrow for a bridal event (super excited for that aaaa) and then driving an hour to have coffee with friends on sunday (where we are all together minus one since she's going to school in a different state) then going to my grandma's as I drive back after. So a very busy weekend! But it's gonna be great!

so im just chilling today and doing some light tasks. I'm gonna have to go to bed super early tonight bc i gotta get up tomorrow and shower/put on my makeup and be out of the house at the latest 9am (but im hoping maybe 8am since traffic can be nuts)

im hoping my car doesnt fuck me over during the trip lol driving an hour is one thing but for some reason 2 hours is scary haha it's been going ok for the last few months (aside from the bumper half falling off)

bloop life rambling under readmore bloop

none of the bridal group is on tumblr (i think?) and they dont know me really but just in case haha under read more!

i was told that it's just gonna be me and one other person of the bridemaids attending. I'm glad im able to go (especially since in the past my jobs ran Tue-Sat with Saturdays being my busiest days) bc man that sucks! I don't know the other bridemaids super well and I understand life happens but idk just kinda sucks that you can't go to an event with the bride that already paid for your spot. But that's just me. I guess some of them knew right off the bat they couldnt go and then some others told her last minute. Again, i get that life happens but damn...

I guess that means I get to hog the bride's attention (along with the other bridesmaid who is super nice) loool~ I'll make it fun for her and we're gonna have a blast! The bride and I have been friends for 10 years! I'm kinda glad I didn't take on a new job just yet when I was laid off.

I had to move my test date again bc my mom needed my help with something on that day that she couldn't reschedule (nothing serious but it's important and hey, i dont mind kinda putting off that math test LMAO) so I rescheduled for November (after my friend's wedding). I'm getting mostly 40/50 on the practice tests (like 38/50 and 44/50 but I'm hitting my goal of at least 37/50 which is what I need to pass the damn thing) so I'm golden.

I think right after I pass and start getting all my ducks in a row I'll begin job searching (obviously) but also planning my next move (either I move out in the middle of 2024 and if that's still in cali or in another state and then i got to see get a different car etc etc). I kinda labeled this year as a recovery year lol like 2020-2022 were pandemic years for me and 2023 was just straight up "Recovery from the pandemic years". It was nice to finally slow down and take my time to refocus my goals and plans.

I really do think, though, that I want to move out of this area (and the state entirely) since it's been touch and go. I dunno what it is with Cali and I know moving to another state isnt a magical fix-it-all but I've out grown it here (plus the outrageous prices holy shit) I'd miss all my friends but I guess that's what video chatting is for lol and it gives my friends a reason to visit another state haha!

Labeling 2023 as a Recovery year kinda helps my "guilt" also. Like it was outta my control I was laid off (esp since everyone and their mom has been laid off this year) but ive been working since i was 18 and going to school so to have all that and then go to nothing at age 30 it was kinda of a shock. Of course...no one planned on a global pandemic either lol life's funny that way.

Either way I'm not out of the woods quite yet but im also not in a totally bad spot. But man i cant wait to pass this test and start sub teaching just to do something lol

#personal #rambling #i was getting everything ready for my trip tomorrow and thinking about the whole year of 2023 so heres my brain rambles #geez i was laid off in feb and now it's oct but ive done a lot of things ive put off due to work (like health and teeth things)#so im glad i took this year off to do that #i didn't think it was gonna take almost a whole year but that's just how things roll i guess #thank god i didnt just dive into a random job though i fell like that was just not a good idea #especially since ive done that pretty much all my life bc of that random guilt of being unemployed #like yea i wanna work and most ppl would say just get a job and then keep looking for your dream job but damn dude #im the type to get swept up in my job and it throws me off #i think though since ive been doing some soul searching and healing im not gonna fall into that trap again #but i mean im not hurting for cash right now esp since ive been house/pet sitting every month so i thought meh just keep studying #and house/pet sitting which is kinda a job lol #oops i rambled in the tags haha #ive been staying off tumblr to get my stuff done so ive built up my rambles lmaooo

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icewindandboringhorror · 10 months

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misc. daily life photos again .. for the every once in a while that I collect enough over a few months to actually make a photo set out of them lol

#Not sure how to caption every photo because you can unfortunately no longer caption photos so that text appears #under them when you view them. you can only add photo descriptions (which is more about literally describing #the image for people who can't see it or etc.). I wish they had the ability to have both captions and descriptions as both are useful for #different functions but it seems they took captions away entirely so. I guess I'll have to just number every picture and then talk about th #em in the tags or soemthing?? SO.. starting from top left to right --#image 1: blackberries BUT also if you look close.. there's a tiny little bug on them lol #image 2: little water droplets on the back of a leaf that looked cool.. love anything with tiny water orbs #image 3&4: a spiky fuzzy sort of caterpillar outside on a yardwork glove.. small friend #image 5: THIS is such a bad slogan!!! what a lie!!! I personally would LOVE to have a sandwich party! in fact I would rather attend a #sandwich party than a pizza party because it would be fun to sample a wide variety of sandwich platters with all different meats and chee #& breads & ingredients & etc. !! now I just wish I could go to a cool sandwich sampling party w a full buffet of various mini sandwiches :#image 6: a chicken sandwich I made myself at home. with swiss cheese >:3 #image 7&8 : HHRGH it's a CAT and also bubble tea!!! AND is pastel teal! but alas.. it was like $20 and I didnt want to pay that but now #looking back on the photos slightly regret it lol. I think it's more because it's a brand name since the cat is some popular cat like hello #kitty or something. I didn't really notice that until later lol. I was just thinking 'OMG A CAT!'. I love all cats. brand or no brand lol #image 9: my single once a year trip to the drink place that has really nice garlic noodles. this time with beef? which was good too. And #the typical drink order of pina colada smoothie (i think it's coconut pineapple and strawberry?). plain matcha bubble tea (favorite and all #I ever get from anywhere). and a strawberry smoothie thing. I also usually get a coffee bubble tea but the place is like 50% of the time ou #of coffee for some reason so. hggh.. Which I know is like everyday food for some people but. I get food from places SO rarely that it's al #ays an event to take a picture about lol. Just cooking at home 99% of the time makes those trips for fancy food more special I guess #Id rather save the money/dont have much in the 1st place .& also am still a freak who hates using apps/dislikes shit like ubereats or etc.#I would literall NEVER get food delivered to my house under any circumstance unless I was dying alone inside on hospital bed rest with no #support system and no transportation and having food delivered to me was my last possible option. otherwise. if I want something so bad #I can just leave the house to physically pick it up myself without involving a middle man to the process and paying more. .. ANYWAY ghjgjh #image 10: BOY in BOX.. playing a new boardgame and he sits inside! rip to my big beautiful son. I miss him.#UpWords is a fun game though. It's similar to scrabble except you can stack the letters? interesting #Okay. that's all the pictures! Also for the record I do think it's a good thing to have image descriptions! I wasn't complaining in the sen #e that I wish they would get rid of them and bring captions back. more just I would like to have both preferrably. I liked being able to #caption things on the occasional post like this where the layout is better suited towards it.#photo diary

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ecoamerica · 22 days

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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cryptidapprentice · 7 months

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man,,,

#marine myths rambles #in the tags #dating app diary #i feel so bad bc now that i AM getting matches on these freakin apps i have to Talk and Make Conversation and ideally Meet Up and its like..#suddenly i am Not In The Mood actually. to talk OR hang out. n i feel BAD bc these seem like nice ppl!!! who id love to at least befriend!!!#(i have bumble n im not listed as looking for anything particular so friendship is in fact an option)#or maybe even smthn more!!! but like. idk why suddenly as soon as i get a match its like '...oh. hmm. idk if i wanna talk actually' 😭😭#like if i had to guess id say its my gd OCD avoidance response thats making me not wanna do the Hard Thing (Talking) but its also like...#...do i rly wanna meet My Person this way?? CAN i rly meet my person this way???? like so much of my whole desire to date someone is like-#-getting along suuuuper well as friends n being able to click personality n humorwise n shit n THEN im like 'oh id love to date this person-#this person'* im not retyping all tht lol #but being on an app kinda takes tht away for me?? ig im just not made for like. online/internet dating :V #bc i think that Click has to be like. In Person for me to reach that point yk?? like i could click w ppl online n be friends fine!! but like #if we meet in person and that irl interaction isnt like the online interactions (which its usually Not just bc of the nature of Online..)#and we dont Click the same way... its like... man... i dont think we can be romantic partners WHICH I FEEL BAD ABT bc its like.#i dont wanna lead anyone on... so it sucks if we click online but i dont feel that same Click in person 🥲🥲#idk maybe im just not emotionally ready to date?????? ugh ig ~24yrs of being single'll do tht to a person 🥲🥲#feel free to dm me w like. advice or smthn if u read all this n have smthn to say 🤷🏽‍♀️ i cant guarantee ill respond (bc im shy 🥴)#BUT ill def read n consider ur words i prommie (also sometimes i dont respond bc idk what to say 😖 but im not ignoring i see u n i hear u)#(not in a creepy literal way. in a figurative way.)

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misterradio · 1 year

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i like that the LMW page for the works says "no sources indicate how much of the movie has been produced" bc like. yeah wikipedia says about 10 minutes were made but i have no idea how true that is and there is no source. sad! the wikipedia page leaves things to be desired. (i havent seen it in a while so maybe it has changed)

also on the topic of the works im glad to see in the youtube comments ppl are saying they'd love to see it completed (and with its old style sensibilities too) bc ME TOOOO!!!!! but seeing youtube comments abt the movie isnt enough i wish people would post abt it online where i can see or draw fanart are whatever o__o GRRRR GRRRRRRR RGRRRR GRRR

i'm also glad the person who got the script said they are working to make a documentary of it and collect more images like concept art and stuff because that would be. SO monumentally cool bc as far as i know there isnt really concept art online. just thinking abt it is making me excited WAAHHHAHHAHUHUHUUhh

okay this post got long cuz i figured i'd put this train of thought in one post instead of like 3 okay bye

#original nonsense #personal #worksposting #the works movie #i made a personal tag for this movie when i posted abt it a lot at once but what if ppl wanna see those thoughts. so main tag it goes.!!!#as main as it can be in its current form i guess lol.#idk if me wanting to see fanart is me wanting there to be a fandom. i barely know what counts as a fandom tbh.#BUT i wouldnt MIND. if i saw other people talk about it and maybe even. see fanart. O__O #see people talk abt it on TUMBLR I MEAN. not that its easy to find anything abt this movie in the tag 'the works'.#i wnder if people posted abt this movie more; how would the people who worked on it feel about it?#idk if anyone conected with it has seen my fanart but honestly i would be very shy. O__O #but i would also love to talk about it with them. i dont know how to approach that thooooouuuuggghhh...#i did ask mr heckbert if i could use images from his website on my now nonexistant wiki and he said yes which feels crazy to me.#i think he was the most obvious person to find online... ms allen has a website but no obvious contact info.... womp womp

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pierregazly · 7 months

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let's show the world ꨄ carlos sainz smau

carlos sainz x wife!reader

warnings: hateful/mean comments, cyberbullying

in which carlos has to make it clear to the world how much his wife means to him, and how strangers on the internet know nothing about them or their relationship.

f1drivernews

liked by username, username, username, and 11,209 others

tagged carlossainz55 and yourusername

f1drivernews it appears ferrari driver carlossainz55 and wife yourusername spent the summer break in style, rumours have it that the resort they stayed in ibiza was almost €7500 per person a night. sainz and his wife have been notorious for staying in extravagant hotels and resorts during both summer and winter breaks. the lifestyles of the rich and famous continues!

view all 399 comments

username oh the things i would do to be a millionaire

username just be like yourusername and bag yourself a rich husband, constant flow of money lol

username that's a polite way of saying just be a gold-digger and you'll be set babes

username lol the fact b4 he met her carlos used to spend breaks with his fam and friends??? has no one told him how much of a red flag this is???

username girl since when is a driver spending their break with their WIFE a red flag???

username €7500 PER PERSON???? aint no way that was carlos' idea lol what a joke

username i'd be so embarrassed to be yourusername like what does girlypop even do??? other than mooch off her husband ofc

username she's actually very successful in her own line of work? not sure what you're alluding to but yeah

username she could be the top 10% of whatever she does and still not be as successful as carlos, hop off hunni

username guess f1drivernews was too nice to post the hideous closeups of yourusername... girly's not looking too great nowadays poor carlos

carlossainz55 has posted a story

liked by yourusername, landonorris, username, and others

replies

landonorris your mrs told me she got a hole in one, how's it feel to suck carlos

yourusername 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

username bet you paid out of your ass for her for this round of golf too smh

username embarrizzing sorrrrryyy carlos

yourusername has posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and others

replies

carlossainz55 thank you for dinner amor, you spoil me as always

username girl delete this rn this is so embarrassing

username loool ur not fooling anyone sweetie

username red nails for a golddigger? typical babes

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, scuderiaferrari, and 2,343 others

tagged carlossainz55

yourusername i'm amazed by you every single day, even more when you come back to our room stinking of champagne 💗

view all 187 comments

landonorris no special post for me?? you told me i was ur son the other day and this is the treatment i get ? emancipation right now

landonorris before you say it, i know that's a big word for elmo. thanks.

alexandrasaintmleux im still obsessed with that jacket 🫶🏻

username you looked so pretty this weekend! carlos is so lucky

carlossainz55 always more special when we're both coming back smelling like champagne hermosa

username i think its like so childish u deleted 75% of ur followers like u wanna be in the public eye but dont want what comes with it??? weird but alright

username im so over you honestly carlos deserves better

username ur acc the worst wag like yikes

f1gossip

liked by username, username, username and 75,903 others

tagged carlossainz55

f1gossip the streets are saying carlos was in suzuka alone this week, his wife of two years yourusername reportedly took a flight home instead of following her husband along to suzuka after the singapore win... trouble in paradise? 👀👀

view all 4,870 comments

username omg it's happening

username FINALLY GOOD RIDDANCE

username my man is back on the market!!!!! time for someone prettier, hotter, better, basically anyone opposite of his wife lol byeeeee

username ur all insane, she has her own job??? she can't follow her husband to every end of the earth

username waiting for the ig stories 'we've decided to split amicably, please allow us privacy'

username LOOOL i bet it's gonna say that word for word!!!! not like we'll see hers tho cause she locked us all out

username this acc made my day ahhhhhhhh

yourusername has posted a story

viewed by landonorris, carlossainz55, alexandrasaintmleux, and others

replies

carlossainz55 amor what's wrong??

yourusername i just dont understand why people have to be so mean.

landonorris carlando to the rescue dont worry y/n

carlossainz55

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 1,399,402 others

tagged yourusername

carlossainz55 this last week has been extra special for me, to know it is the anniversary of the first time i met my best friend, and that she was able to be with me when i lifted the trophy in singapore is a wonderful feeling.

but to see all the ignorant, unkind, and hurtful comments that are regularly directed at my wife has put a negative twirl on this time. my wife, to me, is the most beautiful woman in the world. she is kind, and loving, and has given up the world for me time and time again. no one knows our relationship more than her and i. many of you speak things that are so ignorant and false it is disgusting. if you are one of these people, please know, you are not a fan i find myself caring for.

i beg those who continue to speak poorly of my wife, to think about how your actions can harm others. thank you. and to yourusername, you are the most important light in my life. i cant wait to see you amor.

comments on this post have been limited

landonorris 🧡🧡

charles_leclerc be kind always!

yourusername te amo, always and forever.

carlossainz55 has posted a story

liked by yourusername, landonorris, username, and 55,399 others

replies

yourusername i didnt even see you take that photo... ur so cute ily

landonorris tell her i got 50 of the flowers for her

username omg i love that book!!!! y/n has great taste what a queen

username i would die to be ur wife, but i would also die to be y/n's wife so lol

ahhhh this is the smau part 2 i promised to my last carlos written story! thank you to the lovely person who requested it, i hope it's what you wanted! please let me know what you think, i hope you all loved it 💗

taglist

@leclercdream @myescapefromthislife @princessria127 @iloveyou3000morgan @love4lando @asfaraslifegets @decseptapril @somanyfandomsbruh @fangirl125reader @imagandom @motorsp0rt @jspitwall @sarahedwards16 @glitterf1 @christianpulisic10 @carlandonorri-s @smoothopz @eugene-emt-roe @epitios @ihrtdan @myloverjk-blog @glow-ish @goldenmclaren @mercunty

if your name is bolded/striked tumblr wont allow me to tag you! ive tried multiple things, but it's unfortunately giving me a very hard time with a few people. im so sorry! please let me know if you'd like to be added to the list!!

#carlos sainz #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #f1 x reader #f1 x you #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x you #f1 smau #carlos sainz smau #carlos sainz imagine #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 #formula 1

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