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macbetha · 3 years

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So very excited to share this! It’s a playlist for my upcoming Free! fic, This Heart of Mine, the rewritten sequel to Eyes Wide Open All the Time. You can listen to the playlist on YouTube; this list simply helps define who or what a song represents to me. This list also includes some lyrics that you may want to pay special attention to. I recommend reading the lyrics by themselves before listening to the playlist. Mind you - some of these lyrics only act as symbolism. Some mean more. Some songs have connections. Some don’t. ;) *go girl give us nothing* List below!

THIS HEART OF MINE: PLAYLIST GUIDE

Theme: Bring Me The Horizon feat. Halsey - In The Dark (MTLT / amo version) Oh so tall, it broke the fourth wall Guess our fairytale had a few plot holes Don’t you know you’ve lost control ↳ Honorable Mentions: ✧ grandson - Bury Me Facedown When I go into the ground I won’t go quietly I’m bringing my crown I won’t get tired Set the town on fire Thinking that they’ve won It’s only just begun ✧ Lorde - Everybody Wants to Rule the World ✧ Ry X - YaYaYa ✧ Rihanna - Goodnight Gotham

CHARACTERS

✦ Haruka ✧ WDL - Monster vs Angel Got my own monster Nobody but me Got my own angel I would never call him enemy He’s the good god I need But both of the sides Fight for me ✧ Mumford and Sons - Broken Crown I’ll never be your chosen one In this twilight How dare you speak of grace But in this twilight Our choices seal our fate I’ll crawl on my belly till the sun goes down I’ll never wear your broken crown ✧ Lia Marie Johnson - DNA Dark as midnight 6 Pack Coors Light You don’t look the same Past my bedtime Blue and red lights come take you away I won’t be like you Fighting back, I’m fighting back the truth Eyes like yours Can’t look away But you can’t stop DNA

✧ Cat Power - Sea of Love Come with me, my love To the sea, the sea of love ✧ Al Green - Love and Happiness (side note: this if my favorite song of all time) Love and happiness Something that can make you do wrong And make you do right

✦ Makoto ✧ The Oh Hellos - Soldier, Poet, King There will come a soldier Who carries a mighty sword He will tear your city down Oh ley, oh lei, oh lord ✧ Labrynth - Still Don’t Know My Name I took your heart I did things to you only lovers would only do in the dark I made you a god Priests, popes and preachers would tell me I did wrong ✧ The Civil Wars - Devil’s Backbone Don’t care if he’s guilty Don’t care if he’s not He’s good and he’s bad and he’s all that I got Oh lord, I’m begging you, please Don’t take that sinner from me ✧ Sleeping At Last - Make You Feel My Love (Cover) I could make you happy Make your dreams come true There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do Go to ends of the earth for you To make you feel my love ✦ Sousuke ✧ Angel Haze - Detox You dance in a cage with some rats in it I’m about chemistry, you just react to me God might turn us to ash, baby I might just taste your last stars tonight We were gods in a world that did nothing but doubt us But fuck it, I got us, from the dirt with the flowers Put in work in the shower ✧ Kaleo - No Good You better start runnin’ When you hear the man coming It won’t do you no good Kiss your baby goodbye Come on love, it’s all right Heaven knows they wanna break you apart ✧ The Oh Hellos - The Lament of Eustice Scrubb Brother, forgive me We both know I’m the one to blame When I touched the water They told me I could be set free ✦ Rin ✧ Halsey - Young God (Lullaby / Music Box Intro, Live from Webster Hall) Running, running, running And we’ll be running, running, running again ✧ SZA - Good Days Tell me I’m not my fears, my limitations I’ll disappear I gotta keep from losing the rest of me Chasing a fountain of youth that’s in the present I’ll await my armored fate with a smile Still wanna try, I still believe in good days ✧ Lola Blanc - Angry Too Does it get your blood boiling? Does it make you see red? Cause it gets my blood boiling It would eat you like poison if you knew what I knew I don’t wanna drink the venom they made me I don’t wanna be controlled by the past But boy, if you were me Could you really blame me? ✧ Kendrick Lamar - u And if this bottle could talk: I cry myself to sleep, everything is your fault Because you shook as you knew confinement was needed I know your secrets Don’t let me tell them to world About the shit you thinking And the time that you - I’m ‘bout to hurl I’m fucked up But I ain’t as fucked up as you ✧ Halsey - More Wooden floors, little feet Flower bud, concrete A little screen, a photograph Mine to take I still believe it won’t be like before I’ve loved you for all of my life ✦ Nao ✧ Johnny Hollow - Worse Things Anger grew like ecstasy And Leda threw the swan on me There are worse things, perverse things You should answer when the phone rings There are worse things I could do ✧ Young Heretics - Bones of a Rabbit You play with wolves But you sleep with the bones of the rabbit You have conquered cities And torched the mighty sea You may keep yourself afloat But you cannot outswim me ✧ Phantogram - Black Out Days (Future Islands Remix) Hide the sun I will keep your face out of my mind I’m hearing voices all the time And they’re not mine Haunting my mind ✦ Natsuya ✧ Gang of Youths - Achilles, Come Down Remember your virtue Redemption lies plainly in the truth Where you go, I’m going When you jump, I’m jumping There is no me without you Today of all days See how the most dangerous thing is love ✧ Florence + The Machine - Cosmic Love The stars, the moon They have all been blown out You left me in the dark ✦ Ikuya ✧ Penelope Scott - Cigarette Ahegao So like, I guess I call it the sophomore slump Always crying and always drunk A few dead, more gone, the rest well on their way Thanks! I hate it Everyone that I love is stuck Because this, that, the other, and the state fucked up We covered it in a class that I’m about to fail ✧ 100 gecs, Laura Les, Dylan Brady - Money Machine Tell me what's the deal, I've been trying to go to bed I've been up for days, I've been trying to get ahead Said it all before, and I'll say it once again I'm better off alone ✧ Halsey - Clementine Through a breakdown or a blackout Would you make out with me Cause I don’t need anyone I just need everyone and then some ✦ Hiyori ✧ Florence + The Machine - Seven Devils Holy water cannot help you now A thousand armies couldn’t keep me out I don’t want your money I don’t want your crown See I’ve come to burn your kingdom down ✧ Michael Buble - Feeling Good (Cover) It’s a new life for me This old world is a new world And a bold world for me Freedom is mine And I know how I feel I’m feeling good ✦ Asahi ✧ Sam Henshaw - Broke If I wasn’t broke Would you spend more time with me Like you said you’d do Tell me what I’m supposed to do Cause the only thing I need Is to be loved by you ✧ Mikky Ekko - Smile Smile, the worst is yet to come We’ll be lucky if we ever see the sun ✦ Aki ✧ Aly & AJ - Church I did bad things, can’t you see it on my face? I get caught in every lie I need redemption for sins I can’t mention For all the things I can’t reverse For all the places where it hurts ✧ ZZ Ward - Ghost Here the devil call out my name I’ve broken promises, burning flame God knows, darling God knows I gave Now the truth cuts like a knife ✦ Nii ✧ Of Mice and Men - My Understandings Keep in mind that I’m a sore eye With blurry vision ✧ Neoni - Outlaw They say that I’m wanted Hear the whispers in the street You better start running Cause nothing scares me Faster, faster You’re the one I’m after You built a fortress But I’ll never kiss the ring I’m my own king

✦ Gou ✧ Melanie Martinez - Lunchbox Friends We can be friends if you wanna be But only till the clock hits three I don’t want no lunchbox friends, no I want someone that binds the ends, no Come to my house, let’s die together Friendship that will last forever ✧ Maroon 5 - Come to the Water Come away little light Come away to the darkness Away from the life that you always knew Come away little lamb Come away to the water To the arms that are waiting only for you ✦ Isuzu ✧ Jessie Reyez - NO ONE’S IN THE ROOM Spent my whole life being graded, being told I’m not enough Being told go find the one and sit and wait for death to come I don’t want to I need to talk to God There’s things I just don’t understand Like who am I when no one’s in the room EMI - Bad Friends Yeah, I got some bad friends No you cannot have them If you wanna talk to them You talk to me, yeah We don’t fuck around with just anybody, yeah

✦ Takuya ✧ Imagine Dragons - Ready, Aim, Fire Off in the distance, there is resistance Bubbling up and festering Here in the casing Shaking and pacing This is the tunnel’s light Blood in the writing, stuck in the fighting Look through the rifle’s sight ✧ Billie Eilish - you should see me in a crown (acapella) Bite my tongue Bide my time Wait till the world is mine, ocean eyes Count my cards Watch them fall Blood on a marble wall You should see me in a crown I’m gonna run this nothing town Watch me make ‘em bow One by one ✦ Kinjou ✧ Urban Country - Knife and Stone Tell me, have you ever seen a mirror Mirror in the middle of the forest Just waiting for the rain or the crown I’ve been up for thirty days Someone point to lost and found Ain’t no blood in the temple Just a knife and stone

✦ Mikhail ✧ Elsie Lovelock - Friends on the Other Side (Cover) The cards, the cards The cards will tell The past, the present, and the future as well I got voodoo, I got hoodoo I got things I ain’t even tried And I got friends on the other side I hope you’re satisfied, but if you ain’t Don’t blame me You can blame my friends on the other side ✦ Ryuuji ✧ elbow - Grounds for Divorce I’ve been working on a cocktail Called Grounds for Divorce Down comes him on sticks but then he kicks like a horse There's a hole in my neighborhood Down which of late I cannot help but fall ✧ Mumford and Sons - The Enemy I am not the enemy It isn’t me, the enemy I came and I was nothing So why did you choose to lean on A man you knew was falling? ✦ Nadia ✧ Halsey - Castle (Orchestral Version) They wanna make me their queen There’s an old man Sitting on the throne Saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut I’m headed straight for the castle

THEMES: GROUPS

✦ FREEBIRD ✧ Kaleo - Way Down We Go Oh father, tell me Do we get what we deserve They will run you down Down till you fall They will run you down Down till you crawl Till you can’t crawl no more And way down we go ✦ ROUGH RABBIT ✧ Imagine Dragons - Who We Are Up on the mountain Down in the king's den It's who we are Doesn't matter if we've gone too far Doesn't matter if it's not okay Doesn't matter if it's not our day ✦ DIAMONDBACK ✧ Florence + The Machine - Bedroom Hymns This is good a place to fall as any We’ll build our alter here In the wine, the women, the bedroom hymns Such selfish prayers, I can’t get enough I’m not here looking for absolution Because I’ve found myself an old solution

✦ HONEYBLADE ✧ Megan Thee Stallion and Normani - Diamonds I love me this much My pear-shape all dripped up He want me to be a little more lady-like? Come through with my girls and beat your ass on ladies night ✦ BLOODHOUNDS ✧ Angel Haze - The Wolves Nothing left out there for me I left my fucking heart out at the sea This shit sounds like the danger zone I’m the big bad wolf Gonna take the throne

THEMES: PAIRINGS

✦ Makoto + Haruka ✧ Phoebe Bridgers - Smoke Signals One of your eyes is always half shut Something happened when you were a kid I didn’t know you then and I’ll never understand why It feels like I did ✧ Radical Face - Welcome Home Peel the scars from off my back I don’t need them anymore I’ve come home ✧ The Track Team - Heart Chakra ✧ Blackmill - Redemption ✦ Sousuke + Rin ✧ Kaleo - Bang Bang (Cover) Seasons came and changed the times I grew up, I called him mine He would always laugh and say: “Remember how we used to play? Bang, bang.” ✧ Zayn - Good Guy I’m not a good guy But I know you’re mine (bang) I know you’re mine (bang, bang) ✧ L'Orchestra Cinématique - Crazy In Love (Instrumental Cover)

✦ Natsuya + Nao ✧ Cosmo Sheldrake - The Moss But have you heard the story Of the rabbit in the moon? Halsey - Colors Your little brother never tells you But he loves you so I hope you make it to the day you’re 28 years old

✦ Hiyori + Ikuya ✧ Elvis Drew - Where Are You I been trying to figure out where you from Is it the moon? Is it earth? Is it this place, where nothing is worse? Nothing can compare to the life we had My dear just grab my hand and let me take you To my wonderland ✧ Swae Lee - Sunflower Some things you just can’t refuse I’m not tryna lose

✦ Isuzu + Gou ✧ Snow Patrol - The Golden Floor I’m a peasant in your princess arms Penniless with only charm

#thomfic #free! fic #thomplaylist #thom

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macbetha · 3 years

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🂱 • this heart of mine

haruka tachibana

#thomfic

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caffernnn · 3 years

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I really have no idea about what will be happening in Thom. I’m just reading and enjoying the universe, but do you have any theories yet and favorite scenes? The “my hands are your hands scene” really stuck with me!

⚠️ WARNING: THoM spoilers through Chapter 5 ahead ⚠️

Ahh thanks for asking!! It’s been nice revisiting the universe and just taking in the little details (seeing the habits and cute lil domestic things that make up the daily lives of makoharu/sourin/Freebird now) but with things now starting to amp up in recent chapters, it’s time to start becoming a detective 😌

The “your hands are my hands” moment was such a striking/beautiful one (have you seen Ale’s art depicting the moment? SO good!), and it is also the scene inspiring one of my theories/predictions, if you can even call it that. I left a long comment on Ao3 talking about this on the most recent chapter, but there are so many signs pointing to Haru inevitably being involved in whatever conflict comes next. He’s made it clear that he is willing to stand down and try to remove himself from any conflict if that’s truly what Makoto wants, but there are so many little symbols and indications in the story already that make it seem like Haru doesn’t have a choice (and never really did). For example, as much as his actions affect Makoto, Makoto’s actions moving forward will also force Haru’s hand. We know that even though Makoto struggled to understand Haru and Sousuke’s sacrifice and draw towards chaos in EWOATT, he knew in his heart that he would fight for his loved ones (he thought as much before the battle in the outskirts; he told Haru as much when they were musing about their future together). He compared himself to Eve and said he’d pursue the temptations of the tree if he thought it’d make a difference, which feels like blatant foreshadowing. We know that he thinks about others too much and can be driven to the point of martyring himself until he’s drained empty if there isn’t someone there to stop him (his internal battles throughout ewoatt; his struggles with teacher burnout and care fatigue now). He’s already shown curiosity in looking further into Misaki’s situation, and I doubt he’ll fully remove himself from whatever is going on with Diamondback, now that we know Hiyori has him on his radar (who knows how much he truly knows about Haru; who knows what he learned since coming to Iwatobi; who even knows what was said between him and Makoto when he asked him for a cigarette???). I worry that even though Makoto is the one who told Haru that their fates are undeniably intertwined now, he’s going to forget that the sentiment works both ways and whatever he’s about to do next is going to throw Haru right back into the fray. And this is all only thinking about if Makoto gets involved in whatever iwatobi’s broken gangs have brewing. Even though they’re in peacetime right now, Haru is still Freebird’s kingpin and guardian, and any move made by anyone in his family now is going to doom him to act. He’s in a damning position of endless devotion to his family, and I think a part of him knows as much (almost falling apart at the thought of losing anyone else after the overdose incident; the way he couldn’t even give a definitive vote, like he knows he has desires but not a true choice in the matter).

FAVORITE SCENE: loving the lighthearted moments so far, like Haru calming Makoto down before school, and Namiko and Misaki’s precious interactions. However, I guess I’m angsty as hell and my favorite chapter/moment so far is Chapter 3 (The Hanged Man P1). Left too many thought about that in the Ao3 comments as well, but part of my love for this universe stems from how it confronts the influence of addiction on others, and seeing how Haru confronts/copes with his own addiction while also trying to inject hope into so many others’ addiction stories hit me in a very personal way. It’s painful but realistic and as much as I love the whimsy and romance in Beth’s writing, I think I’ll always be most drawn and amazed by her moments of sobering realism and how she addresses overarching conflicts like addiction/poverty/etc. in her works.

Thanks for giving me a chance to ramble — I’d love to hear any of your thoughts, theories, and/or favorite scenes as well!! 💚💚💚

#would love to see theories from ppl who know more about tarot cards and the Garden of Eden story #the symbolism feels important but I honestly don’t know enough to make any substantial claims or theories #thanks for asking!#thomfic #thomfic spoilers #fic recs #long post #anonymous

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caffernnn · 3 years

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In honor of THOM releasing soon, I wanted to thank you for inspiring me to read EWOATT. I typically don’t read stories that deal with heavier topics, but because you spoke so highly of it and because Beth is such a good author I gave in and read it. It was truly amazing and I’m looking forward to the sequel! Before we get new content what was your favorite makoharu scene from the story?

🥺 oh wow this means so much!! I’m glad you gave EWOATT a chance and ended up enjoying it <3 it was one of the first AU fics (and @macbetha fics) I gave a chance and it completely changed my perspective on AUs. So much love for that universe 💙

⚠️ SURPRISE there are EWOATT spoilers beyond this point ⚠️

Picking out a favorite makoharu scene is harddd because part of the beauty of their relationship is seeing how much they grow alongside each other. The Halloween date/kiss in Chapter 9 is a staple moment because oh my god finally and I am so unbearably soft for all of the growth/tenderness that happens in Chapters 14/15 that builds up to Haru realizing he’s never felt so utterly accepted and safe with someone before. Soooo many cute little moments between them where they just get to be so goofy and young and normal in ways they never thought they deserved to be (like being absolute dorks over good-morning texts). However, my absolute favorite will always be Chapter 30.

If you couldn’t tell from my other favorite scenes, I am always a sucker for the Makoto-centric plot points and chapters (which has me so !!!!!! for THoM) because I’ve always been intrigued with the different layers of his character. Heck, I frat checked out the story after seeing some fanart of Makoto and his prosthetic because “what could possibly be the story behind that?” EWOATT explores a wide range of topics, but one of my favorite parts is how it deals with health and recovery. Chapter 30 is such an important chapter in my eyes because it is one of the hardest tests for the Freebird family, especially for Makoto and Rin. Throughout the story, part of the intensity and loyalty behind makoharu and sourin comes from their willingness to risk their lives and their sanity time and time again for the people they love. However, this is the part of their story where they have to be willing to live, to breathe, to fight in a way that doesn’t involve fists or guns or tactical deceit. The hardest part of ending the drug war and obtaining the “normal” life they dreamed of didn’t happen in the outskirts or in the final moments with Miho and Corro; it happened in every few minutes Haru struggled to breathe on his own and every hour Makoto spent trying to still be a teacher and a friend and a person amidst stale waiting room cups of coffee and taunting monitor beeps. You can probably find more of my thoughts in the comments section of those last few chapters (I’m sure I rambled about all of this before at some point during one of my rereads) but yeah, there is so much beauty in that chapter.

#thanks for asking!#happy birthday to Beth and THoM <3 #love getting to talk about this universe #ewoatt #ewoatt fic #thomfic #anonymous

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