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phemon · 3 years

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Wow, okay this is out of left field. After *checks last fanfic* jesus, 3 YEARS of not posting any works I come out from the shadows with a new fanfic.

Weird thing, it’s not Undertale, it’s Hololive shipping. Yup, that new trend that I still do not understand completely (basically streamer but Live2D face-tracker anime girl?). I got into a ship from the 1st gen (specifically Amelia and Gura, and a bit of Kiara and Calliope)

For the record, I don’t condone the act of shipping ACTUAL PEOPLE together, but the AmeGura art and actual things they’ve done together is too cute to pass up. I hope that whomever enjoys this ship enjoys what I have to offer (and two more sequels are planned in the very near future. In fact I’m most likely going to start writing them after posting this)

For context, it’s my take on the “ending” of a series of works called “From Ame to Same” by FinnGalaxy on Ao3. They will be properly credited there when I do post it on Ao3. In a sense, it’s technically fan-fanfiction lol

Also, the title is a reference to the stellar Friday Night Funkin’ mod Smoke Em Out Struggle, which I was listening to the entire time I was writing this.

Enjoy.

Gura never thought about what happens when you’re about to die; but she realizes now that it doesn’t really matter. She’s seen multitudes of colonies, societies and cliques rise and fall, all while she watches in the background, wondering if it’ll ever happen to her. She’s never known another of her species long, so she has no clue of the lifespan of an Atlantean. All she knows is that it has taken way too long; but it’s finally happening.

She’s finally dying.

She hasn’t heard from any of her friends from the old times in a long time. Ina was the first one to suddenly disappear. She mentioned something about meeting the Elder Ones during her last stream and hasn’t been seen since. Of course, Calliope happened next when she lost her human body. Gura used to commune with Calli whenever she had time off from her reapings; but those occasional communications also ceased for whatever reason. Gura felt no ire, she’s sure Calli had her reasons. She never met her in the human world again, so Gura concluded she wasn’t able to find another body to occupy. Kiara was last seen flying through the air aimlessly with no plan, and Gura expected she needed some time alone. A lot of time, apparently.

And Amelia. Gura kept telling herself that that fateful day when her sunshine left her that final letter was not the last time she’d see her; but she knew she was lying to herself. Gura kept on making excuses like “Oh she’s probably jumping the time streams, searching for the answer to longevity and she’ll be right back when she’s done.” but lying to yourself for over 1000 years straight gets old. She only wished she could’ve kept the letter Amelia left for her, but like everything on this damned rock, nothing lasts forever and has decomposed. She didn’t think much of it anymore, she knows her memory’s not going anywhere.

Gura picked a quiet, serene place to die: an abandoned beach. Nice place to watch both the sunset and the ocean. She remarked that she gets to see her two favorite places that remind her of her two favorite things: The sea, from whence she came; and the sun, representing the place she left her heart, with Amelia.

No-one was around to spend her final days with, as she never kept anyone close to her since her first friends. No need to form any relationships if they’re just going to dissolve once they die, she figured.

“Stupid Ame.” Gura muttered to herself, hugging herself closer to keep warmer. “Are you really not going to meet your wife ONE time before she dies? You really are cruel, you bozo...”

“Hey, you’re still badmouthing me until your last dying breaths? You pain me, sharky.”

“Great, now I’m hallucinating her voice right before I die, what a pai-” Gura stops halfway and whips around to find an all too familiar figure standing in front of her. “A-Ame?”

“Long time no see, Gura.” Amelia remarks nonchalantly as she walks up to Gura. She pushes her back down as Gura stands up to greet her. “Stay down, save your energy right before you die, right?”

“I.. I don’t get it. Why are you back? HOW are you back? Why are you back now?” Gura has so many questions she doesn’t know where to start.

Amelia heaves a grunt and sits beside her. “I suppose I do owe an explanation, huh?” Amelia ponders a moment before starting again. “Well, your memory’s still sharp, right? Do you remember why I left in the first place?”

“Of course I do!” Gura almost shouts, but realizes she doesn’t need to raise her voice when Amelia’s right next to her. “I remember everything in that goodbye letter you wrote. Lots of cheesy lines in that, BT-dubs” Gura jokes which Amelia chuckles back at. “Sorry I couldn’t keep the letter; paper only lasts for so long.”

“Hey, I’m not the only one with the cheesy lines. I got your letter from Calli, she was somehow able to find the right me; despite me time-jumping all over the place.” She pulls out a small piece of paper. “Decomposing doesn’t matter to a time-traveler, so I still got mine. Anyways, I left because I wanted to find a way to be forever with you. And suffice to say, I didn’t find it.”

“Yeah, I gathered that when you left me alone for 1000+ years.” Gura commented dryly.

“Can it, shorty.” Amelia bit back. “Well time-traveling back and forth multiple times without resting took a massive toll on my body, and I was informed by Calli,” Amelia mutters “figures” under her breath “that I had only a few time-travels before it would be it for me. I pondered going back to see you one last time and dying in the timeline I met you guys.”

“On one hand, I’d be happy that you did return. On the other hand, you dying in my arms...” Gura thinks of the possibility and shudders. “So what you’re saying...”

“Yup, this is my last time travel. I went forward in time and found out when the last Atlantean Shark died, and figured it was you. Only hard part was finding out where you decided to die. Thank the stars you didn’t decide to sink to the bottom of the seabed alone.”

“And you figured that I’d want to die somewhere with some memories.” Gura concluded and Amelia nodded. “You recognize this place? We went on many midnight strolls down this beach.”

“Well the landmarks are certainly different from our time as Hololive members, but the geographical position is similar.” Amelia comments, looking at the surroundings.

“Yup, still our special place.” Gura smiles and intertwines her hand with Amelia’s. “So, now that you’ve explained why and how you’re here, I can finally say what I’ve been wanting to say.” Gura places her head on Amelia’s shoulder. “I’ve missed you, Sunshine.”

“The feeling’s mutual, sharky.” Amelia squeezes the shark’s little hand. “You know, I expected you to look radically different in 1000 years. But you’ve barely changed, save for a couple lines around your eyes.”

“I look the same because my heart left with you when you disappeared.” Gura gets up and whispers into Amelia’s ear.

Amelia turns several different shades of red. “Okay, how many years did it take you to come up with that corny ass line?”

“Couple hundred.” Gura jokes, then returns to her position beside Amelia. “I suppose when I arrived at Hololive I was already an adult. And you...” Gura sits up slightly to get a better look at Amelia’s form. “You still look the same as when you left me. What, you didn’t find the secret to immortality but found eternal beauty instead?”

“Well, by my own personal timeline, I say it’s only been a couple years since I left you, so I guess I haven’t changed mu-” Amelia attempts to explain how old she is but is cut off by Gura.

“Ha, trick question! You’ll always be beautiful in my eyes.” Gura faces Amelia and gives her a toothy grin.

And tomato red goes Amelia again. “I should NOT have left you that long if all you were going to do is come up with cheesy one-liners.”

“Damn straight!”

“Which begs the question.” Amelia shuffles into a more comfortable position and stares at the slowly descending sun. “Apart from coming up with the one-liners, what HAVE you been doing for over a millennium?”

“Oh, I’ve got a bunch of stories to tell you, Ame.” Gura starts, preparing her vocal chords. “But they’re going to take some time.”

“Wow, you’ve sure been on some adventures, Gura.” Amelia remarks, not shifting from the spot they’ve been sitting for the past couple hours. The sun has been slowly descending past the horizon and is minutes away from plunging the surroundings into twilight.

“Well, we’re not going anywhere, Gura. Let’s hear them.”

---

“I’ll always say this, they will never top the time I spent with you guys.” Gura stretches and lets out a big yawn. “Think it’s about time for me, how about you?”

“Thinking about the same, Gura.” Amelia feels the most tired she’s ever been, and that includes the massive amount of time-travelling she’s done. “Let’s hope we’ll meet again once we go through... Whatever the hell happens when you die, huh?”

“Oh please. Now that you’re back by my side, you’re not leaving it, alive or not. Afterlife or whatever it’ll be, I’m making sure we’re never separated.” Gura struggles to keep her eyes open.

“I’ll hold you onto that, sharky.” Amelia gives her wife’s hand one last squeeze. “From now on...”

“Until forever...”

“‘Till death do us part.” They say in unison.

...

“Wait, we’re dying right now. Maybe we shouldn’t’ve said that.”

“Don’t ruin the moment, dork.”

#hololive #fanfic #amegura #amelia x gura

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awed-frog · 6 years

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Hi! I realized something the other day (I'm really slow wth) My parents have the same age as Dean, lit (I know weird but wathever) and my mum is homophobic (I'm bi, sad story lol) and she watches the show with me. The thing is that I annoy her with Destiel and she gets really angry (at some point she started disliking Cas, imagine that) and she looks for back up in my aunt for example, peolple her age. But me? My friends know that I'm bi, one confessed she thought she was too 1/2

2/2 and one of my bf ships Destiel really hard too. And it made realize of just how difficult it must be for Dean to “came out of the closet” if he is bi (I’m sure he is but till it becomes canon…) I mean, it’s not easy for me, it’s not easy right now for a lot of people but I’m positive that it’s better than before. Dean and people his age had it worse I think and it opened my mind to how much he must have struggled, how possible it was that Jhon could have hit him for that, oh too long 2/3

3/3 Bc before realizing this? I was like “Jhon beating hip up for this? no way. Maybe if he caught Dean while drunk and half out of his mind, but sober and knowing exactly what he’s doing?” And i must sound really stupid sorry, bc now it happens this too but it’s just WOW poor Dean, I wanna hug him. Also Charlie is a champion, and those married hunter couple 😢 Why do people do this (Also, if you have more idea of how it used to be, could u tell me? Correct me if I’m wrong?) bye ❤

Hey there! Sorry you’re having some trouble with your mom, here’s to hoping she’ll grown more accepting with time!

(But even if she doesn’t, remember that has nothing to do with you - she can choose whether to be tolerant and kind, while you can’t choose whether to be bi or not, so the ball is in her camp.)

As for Dean - yeah, he’s more or less my age, but he moves in a background that’s vastly different from mine - I’m sure other people (maybe @bert-and-ernie-are-gay or @mittensmorgul or @thejabberwock?) could tell you what it was like to grow up in the States around that time, and how queer people were perceived. All I can tell you is that in my corner of the world, being gay was something people expected you to keep quiet about - in my school, only one kid was out, and five other had that kind of ‘we all know but they never said anything so we pretend we don’t know and maybe we’re wrong’ status, and I know life had its ups and downs for them. Some people were really antagonistic (it was mostly boy on boy banter that was the problem, and I know that the worst time for gay kids was P.E., because here everyone is expected to shower together, so a vague ‘Tom looks sorta gay, haha’ can quickly turn into a ‘Hey why is that f*ggot staring at me now I’m naked’ and then all bets are off), and most people didn’t really care one way or the other, but still - the trouble is, you grow up in a culture where you don’t really have positive representation of any kind - gay people were either men dressing up and wearing feathers in funny movies or hospital patients dying of AIDS in sad movies - even for someone like me, who grew up in a weird household and read all kind of books, it was difficult to imagine a gay person being - a normal person, you know what I mean? Someone who’d have a relationship one day, and a house and a whatever job and would fight over whose turn it was to wash the dishes. And for kids with conservative parents, things were often much harsher, as I wrote here. Plus, even in the 1990s, AIDS was a big concern for most of us, gay or straight, so that was a problem as well - the illness was no longer perceived as a ‘gay’ illness (which it never was, by the way), but the fact we were bombarded with messages about the importance of condoms and safe sex, even as kids, played a role in our general understanding of sexuality (our own and other people’s).

For me, personally, the consequence of this climate of silence and diffidence in how we approached the matter meant that I considered my crushes on girls to be ‘just a phase’, or something like ‘I want to be like her’ rather than ‘I want to be with her’; whether this prevented me from seeking out romantic connections with women, we’ll never know, but since I’m insanely happy with the relationship I have now and am deeply in love with the man who shares my life, it’s not really a problem for me. That said, yeah, it doesn’t really surprise me to see that the more openly we discuss the subject and the more we respect what we feel, the fewer people identify as straight - in the UK, 49% of young people are not straight, and to me that’s a figure that makes perfect sense. We generally fall in love with souls, not bodies, so the more open-minded we are about such things, the more our potential to form relationships with anyone broadens. And, of course, as we’re heading into an age where AI will be a thing, it’s likely our understanding of what a suitable partner is will change a lot over the next few decades.

As for Dean Winchester - as I said, I’m not an expert, but this is a guy who grew up in a very different - and often hostile - environment. Unfortunately, the US is still a country where members of the LGBT community face significant risks - risks teen!Dean would be very familiar with, since half his job as a hunter-in-training was going through the newspapers looking for cases. For instance, in 1993, when Dean was fourteen, there was the murder of Brandon Teena, and the year before, Allen Schindler was killed - since he was a soldier on duty, it’s likely John would have discussed that sooner or later, and the wider ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ issue. And, I don’t know - I don’t see John as homophobic, exactly, but still - he would have considered his kids’ legitimate wish to form a relationship with someone an annoyance at best (I wonder if Sam or Dean ever sulked when they had to move because they’d lose touch with a crush or a girlfriend, for instance - they must have, right?) and an irrational luxury at worst (a partner can distract you or get targeted by enemies, as John knew from experience), and as for Dean being bi - objectively, men are more dangerous than women, and there is a significant risk a predator will pretend to be gay to trap you and hurt you, so I’m thinking this is the reason John would have objected to Dean’s choices, if nothing else. Furthermore, we’ve seen how conservative the hunter community is (or used to be) - I think John would have agreed with the adults I met growing up - would have said that okay, whatever - if Dean wanted to have fun with a man, who could stop him, right, but he’d better be careful and he’d better be private about it and ‘Jesus, let’s hope the kid doesn’t like it up the ass’ because, whatever, people have been having trouble with this particular thing for the past three thousand years and that’s not likely to change any time soon. So, yeah - I think there’s a good chance Dean took a long time to even understand he was attracted to men as well, and there’s a possibility that his acceptance and understanding of himself was muddled by the fact he was abused at some point, and turned tricks later in life - personally, my headcanon is that his experimenting years happened during the Stanford era, when he was mostly alone, and since then he’s not really thought about the whole thing a whole lot - partly because he’s always with Sam (and Sam can be very judgemental), and mostly because Dean’s got zero time for any of that stuff, and a lifespan to match - we know he thinks he shouldn’t have any relationships at all, for a bunch of reasons, and that honestly breaks my heart.

Poor guy. I really, really hope he’ll get his happy ending - God knows he deserves it.

#ask #dean winchester #dean meta #kid!dean #the 90s #gay teen #lgbt issues #guys please feel free to pitch in #it's important that kids learn about history #and i'm really not qualified to answer this question

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