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#this is so funny love and light <3
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world's most annoying man is not allowed outside due to his inability to shut up
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amaranth · 2 years
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swordheld · 6 months
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hi! your blog is one of my favourites and i absolutely adore reading your thoughts. my grandfather recently passed away and it feels like i lost myself with him. how do i continue living after this? there is this constant weight on my chest and it feels like an emptiness has made a home inside of me. how do i go on when it feels like the world crashed on my shoulders?
hello, love! this is so very sweet and kind of you, and i hope you're treating yourself gently and kindly right now - there aren't words for a loss like this. that heaviness is difficult, and hard, and painful. it's okay if things don't feel okay, right now, or even soon - i think that's something that a lot of the people i know that have gone through similar grief feel: like they should be able to get back to a relative 'normal' in a [insert far too short period of time].
but it's okay if it hurts. that's where i'd like to start. you're allowed to feel that emptiness, that world-crashed feeling that goes beyond words, beyond time. don't feel like you have to rush this to feel some sort of better. things get easier with time, i promise you this, but sometimes painful feelings are important to feel, too. cry, scream, feel your emotions. they're a part of you. grieve.
it's perhaps a little silly, but when i think about death i always think about a couple of space songs: mainly drops of jupiter by train and saturn by sleeping at last. there are perhaps others that speak to the emotions better, but these two have always hit something a little deeper for me, and are popular for a wide-reaching reason.
and while personally i don't know much about grief like this, i do know a lot about love; and i think they're a lot of the same thing.
the people we love are a part of us, and this is why it takes from us so deeply when we lose them, because it does feel like we've lost a part of ourselves in the wake of it. but it's because they were so central to our experiences of living - our lives, that the separation introduces a hollowness - a place where they used to be. a home that now goes unlived in.
an emptiness, like you said.
but just because they're not here physically, doesn't mean he's not still there, in your heart, in your life, your memory. you can hold him close in smaller ways, as well: steal a sweater, or cologne/scent for something a little more physical and long lasting for remembering. hold onto the memories you cherish, the things that made you laugh, the ease of slow mornings and gentle nights. write them all down, slide a few photographs in there, go through it and add more when you miss him. keep them all close, keep them in your heart.
you're not alone, in this. he's still there, with you, it's just - in the little things.
he's with you in the way you see and go about your daily life, in doing what he liked to do, in the ways he interacted with the world that you shared with him. the memories you recall fondly when the night is late or the moment is right and something calls it into you like a melody, an old bell, laughter you'd recognize anywhere.
but i think, perhaps most importantly above all others - talk about him. with your family, your friends, his friends, strangers; stories are how we keep the people we love alive. the connections they've made, the legacies and experiences they've left behind, and so, so many stories.
how lucky, we are - to love so much it takes a piece of us when they go. grief is the other side of the coin, but it does not mean our love goes away. it lives in you. it lives in everyone who knew him, in the smallest pieces of our lives.
the people we love never really leave us, like this: they're in how we cook and the way we fold our newspapers, our laundry, in the radio stations we tune in to and the way we decorate our walls, our photo albums. they're in the way we store our mail, organize our closets, the scribbled notes in the indexes of our books. the meals we love and the drinks we mix, the way we spend time with one another. they've been passed down for generations, for longer than history - and we are all the luckier for it.
think about what you shared with him, and do it intentionally. bring him into your life, like this, again. whether it's crosswords or poetry or sports or anything else. if one doesn't help, try another. something might click.
i hope things feel a little easier for you, as they tend to do only with time. i hope you find joy in your grief, even if it is small and hard to grasp at first. know that your hurt stems from so much love that there isn't a place to put it properly, and that it is something so meaningful and hurting poets and storytellers have been struggling to put it into words and sounds that feel like the fit right for eons, and that it is also just simply yours. sometimes things don't have to make sense. sometimes they just are - unable to be put into words or neat little sentiments, as unfair and tragic as they come.
but i promise it will not feel like this forever. your love is real. and perhaps, on where to begin on from here - i think it's less on finding where to begin and just beginning. and you've already started. you've taken the most important and crucial step: the first one. wherever you go, after that, from here? you'll figure it out. you always have, and you always do. it'll come, as things always do. love leads us, as does light - and you're never alone in your hurt. in your grief, your missing something dear to you. i think if you talk about it with others, you'll find they have ways of helping you cope as well - and they have so much love of their own to spare, too.
as an aside, here is the song (northern star by dom fera) i was listening to when i wrote this, for no other reason more than it makes me think of connections, and love, and how we hold onto the people we love and how they change us, wonderfully and intrinsically. it's a little more joyous than the others i've mentioned, and plays like a story, and it made me think of what is at the core of this, love and stories and i am here with you, and maybe it'll bring you some joy, if you'd like it. wishing you all my love and ease 💛
#q&a.#birdsong.#wishing u gentle ease; the death of a loved one is near inexplicable to put into words and i hope you take care of yourself gently <3#i hope this will make u laugh: when i was a tiny child in middle school there were times i would go outside in my tiny suburban cul de sac-#in the rain and sing along to my lil ipod nano and i only remember doing this to drops of jupiter. can you imagine going out to get the mai#after a long day of work and you just hear this kid singing train in the streets. in the RAIN.... it makes me laugh like i really.#i really thought i was so cool and deep and emotional ghjkd but i find it v funny that i only remember it w/ that one train track.#and saturn just. it's my fav s.a.l. song for a reason. that slow violin opening? the piano coming in gentle and easy?#it feels like light. like hope. like something new - a dawn after the long dark. that beautiful things can begin again even where#it hurts. and there is nothing more human than a sentiment like that.#how rare and beautiful it is to truly exist. what it is to be alive and get to be here and live with other people. with those we love.#i think your grandfather was so lucky to be able to know you. to have you in his life for the time you had together.#i'm no spiritual person; but i like to believe when you're thinking about him? he's thinking about you too.#the second law of thermodynamics (physics nerd mode) is that no energy has ever been created/destroyed since the beginning of the universe.#so it has to go somewhere - it's that carl sagan quote of 'we're all made of stardust'. because we are. we used to be stars; planets; etc.#i think it's why i think of these space songs - because they're a part of everything; once more; when they go. us and everything else.
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jackfuckingtwist · 4 months
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We shall triumph. Our time together does not end here.
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mattodore · 11 months
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let me hit your cigarette, the taste of you
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small-spark-of-light · 6 months
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day 23 was to pick a color palette and stick to those colors(with some blending allowed)
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little-lost-canary · 1 year
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Uhhhh I feel this speaks for itself. Sorry?
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skitskatdacat63 · 1 year
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2009 Chinese Grand Prix - Sebastian Vettel(ft. Mark Webber & Jenson Button)(not pictured: Parc Fermé )
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ssstrawberryflowers · 7 months
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well this morning as I woke up from a 4 or so hour night of sleep i had the brilliant idea of trying to fight Gabriel in 3-2 on Violent while listening to a youtube video, with no in-game music, relatively low in-game master sound and without having actually beaten him (on Violent) after having spent over three hours and a half exclusively trying to kick his ass a few days ago.
so. uhm. yeah. drew how it felt (while also remaining as vague as i could as to not upset anyone lol)
this was both surprisingly hard but also relatively quick? in a weird sort of way? idk girl
screenshots below if you care lol
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the 3h30 hour attempt proof (i quit at fucking 3 am my wrists were sore as fuck)
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the one successful attempt (was surprisingly quicker than expected)
so uh. yea. laughed really loudly when i did beat him and when he called me an insignificant fuck again. 11/10 will do again.
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thedeadthree · 7 months
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-`. WHAT FORM OF LOVE IS YOUR OC?
TAGGED BY @corvosattano, @chuckhansen, @jillvalentinesday, @leviiackrman, @jackiesarch, @marivenah and @nightbloodbix to take this quiz!!! thank you !!!! ❦
TAGGING: @flymm, @bloodofvalyria, @griffin-wood, @dekarios, @lavinet, @gortash, @fragilestorm, @dameayliins, @risingsh0t, @moonmothers, @cptcassian, @marivenah, @faerune, @mrdekarios, @queennymeria, @unholymilf, @florbelles, @jendoe, @jackiesarch, @adelaidedrubman, @theviridianbunny, @yennefre, @vanoefucks, @katsigian, @yennas, @fenharel, @full---ofstarlight, @baldursgate2, @druidgroves, @anoras, @lavampira, @bg3, @grapecaseschoices, @sstewyhosseini, @gwynbleidd, @shadowglens, @quickhacked, @malefiicarum, @minaharkers, @envergothash, @feypacts, @themalkavian and you!
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-`. LOVE THAT HEALS.
your love is healing. it burns you with every bit of your soul, but you choose to heal, nevertheless. you are so, so so strong and i hope you know that. i send you peace. i send you calm. i hope things will become better for you in time, just as you have made others better in time as well.
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-`. LOVE THAT LASTS.
love unconditional, love unfailing. you love no matter what happens because you believe in the best – of you, and them. it will hurt and it will fail you, but this love tastes so sweet – you can never believe that it bitters sometimes. the way you choose to love unconditionally is incredible.
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-`. LOVE THAT PROTECTS.
you love so fiercely, with every fibre of your being. maybe you were wounded by love in the past ; such that you choose to love and love and love so wonderfully that the next person who comes into your life never doubts that they are loved by you.
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-`. LOVE THAT STRENGTHENS.
you make sure that people know that they are loved, and you give them strength when they need it the most. this is an ability that is rare; the love that you hold speaks wonders of yourself. i hope you're doing alright. isn't it exhausting always being the bigger person?
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-`. LOVE THAT CALMS.
this is sweet. i hope you know that you make others feel at ease around you. you're a gem, a blessing, a treasure – and you should know it. it's comfortable loving you. it's a privilege to be around you and to be let into your world.
#only if you want to of course! <3#oc: anasyana an enaviryn#oc: tissaia thorm#oc: vaermina vanthampur#oc: amavet aerasume#oc: virthac vyuthurim#as always ash i owe you my life for the worlds cutest banners!!#leg.tagged#leg.ocs#tissaia and love that lasts oh the way i am CRYING RAHHHHH#holding her gently in my HANDS wrapping her in a blanket and making her fresh pastries MY BAAABY OH POOR BABYYY !!!!!!!#amavet and virthac and the EXACT answers i knew i felt in my SOUL they would have oh we love to see it <3#yana and love that heals WHEEZE murder muffin bbg !!!!!!!#shhdkah shes the one who IS THE PAIN *wheezes* BUT THE WAY HER ANSWER HIT ME LIKE A TRUCK !!!!!!#the way i was thinking haha funny until i read it and then it HIT ME !!!!! uquiz taking me out with these answers AGAIN!!!!!!#'it burns you with every bit of your soul' LIKE YOU WOULDNT BELIEVE BESTIEE!#(btw YANAGORTASH REUNION HAPPENED AND UHHHHH THOUGHTS THIS AND THE REUNION I HAVE THINGS ON THE BRAIN !!!!!!!!)#tissaia the one who became an urchin when she was whisked from moonrise the one who was left at last light the one who had grown#so accustomed to people coming and going that the old fear of them leaving was replaced by expecting those she holds dear to leave after sh#becomes attached !!!!!!!!! the one who gains a love that lasts with her friends HER SISTER and a lover in gale A LOVE THAT LASTS#crying crying screaming sobbing BABY BABY!!!!!!!!#vaermina wounded by love in the past by her own family by partners BABY GIRL YOUR EVERYTHING TO MEE#oust your mother as grand duke thwart your brothers marry that disney prince warlock you DESERVE IT POOKIE#VIRTHAAAAC they are the sweetest soul the cutest cutie THEYRE BABY THEYRE MY SWEET BABY BABY only the loveliest for kar OFC!!!!!!!!! <3#the calm to their fiery dynamic theyll have theyre my BABIES#AMAVEEEET *dizzy*#'i hope you're doing alright. isn't it exhausting always being the bigger person?' WHEN I TELL YOU I SCREAMED#using ams fc for now for this until i can fix his beard jksnkdnad#AND TY TY FOR THE TAG DEARS OH I MISSED DOING TAGS SO STONKIN MUCH#a small handfull of the tadfools bc the silly balduring gates game has the braincell *giggles* <3
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fullscoreshenanigans · 5 months
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What's your favorite official art outfit (POSUKA AND ANIME, DOESN'T MATTER.) on the trio that isn't the standard GF or bunker uniform?
Mine is definitely Ray's Halloween outfit.he rocks it!
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The detailing in the second variation of the Alice in Wonderland outfits for Norman's 2022 birthday art owns mine entire ass:
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The eminence, the majesty radiating off of it with the shimmers and rainbows, their poses, Emma in pants with a dashing coat and vest combo. I can even forgive the Ray-blue Norman-green color assignment given their respective roles of Cheshire Cat and Mad Hatter. Love seeing them older with a flair of youthful impishness.
But I'm also partial to that Halloween art and the fourth light novel cover:
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Love how tranquil and laid back they look after everything.
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sysig · 1 month
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Getting up to trouble is his speciality (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#ZEX#The Captain#Mixed set! :D Lots of singular doodles - one-offs or ones that apply to a few different scenes#The kiss is random tho <3 I still haven't gotten to ZEX showing off his uniform to Zelnick! I want them to!!#Him seeing his Captain in his uniform was so lovely tho <3 I love Big Love and that was so <3 Hehe#Smooch ♥#ZEX does not eat enough ;; He eats like a bird and it's highly distressing#I actually wrote in my notes that I was surprised he wasn't hurting In The Same entry as when he was experiencing hunger pangs haha#It doesn't help that he tends to talk through meals rather than eat - he's so much more interested in making connections with humans!#As far as metaphors go - killing himself for the sake of trying to bridge that gap - I mean it's apt but ZEX please#I think it was while he was talking to Wally at one point that he framed the War in a very flippant light-hearted way which was funny to me#I don't think that's the descriptor most people would use haha#Swearing <3 <3 VUX terminology <3 <3#I want a VUX glossary of terms so badly hehe I've been slowly compiling a few here and there :3 Direct translation! The dream ♫#Him getting stressed enough to swear is very endearing haha ♪ What do you mean I'm endeared by everything he does don't be silly#The next one of me deeply enjoying when he's creepy is not proof of anything! Just because I Happen to also like that!!#I do really love when he's creepy tho agh <3 <3 The mental image of him as The Hunter - casually cornering and capturing his prey <3#In that instance he was interrupted pretty quickly but the setup was there!! And it was extremely good!!!#I love how huffy he gets as well haha ''All these humans interrupting my seduction attempts >O( ...Wait O|'' lol#And finally an exchange on the board between him and Scarecrow haha so many fun faces around!!#I love him being completely baffled by a non-mechanical construct it just short-circuits his brain haha ♥#He's so intelligent but there exists things unknowable!#The image of him tapping his pen is so Incredibly cute ah <3 Where did he learn such a thing! Does it translate from his VUX form to this ♪#Anything everything ♥ Learned or known! It's wonderful
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mellorine-dreams · 26 days
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Actually this panel from chapter 66 is so fucking wild like. What do you mean “I can’t handle lightning in more ways than one”. Have you tried to take him on in other ways before, Mephisto ? You’ve already said this much, you may as well spill the beans
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flosimo · 1 year
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Evil Jaskier!
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mattodore · 3 months
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...okay so the b&a of this edit looks a lot less impressive than i thought it would
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#i sunk like five hours into this edit all together i think... how......... like where did all that time go.........#well. skdfjnhdkjfhksdgghdfjknghkjndfkhdfkjhdknjfgh#river dipping#ts4#theodore doe#matthias evanoff#a burning house to live in#echthroi#ykw is so funny..................... i already have three other screenshots i want to edit 🧍#i just really love the way their sims look when they're in their thirties and the lighting in this room is so gorgeous#BUT! i'm gonna save that for later. rn i'm just gonna scroll and post some drafted reblogs and then read#i seriously used like all of my free time yesterday messing around in photoshop......... today i'm just gonna do next to nothing#<- person who knows they're incapable of not looking at their ocs every few hours <- i am definitely going to end up in photoshop again#anyway............................ good morning!!!!!!!! <333 i'm so happy i finally answered that ask last night like!! i'm really trying#to be more timely with my responses to people!! that said... i'm definitely behind on my activity again#and i still have mentions i wanted to reply to from last month. eek.#listen........................... Avoidant personality disorder (AVPD) is a mental health condition that involves chronic feelings of#inadequacy and extreme sensitivity to criticism. People with AVPD would like to interact with others#but they tend to avoid social interactions due to their intense fear of rejection.#thank you cleveland clinic definition of avpd <3
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naoiseart · 1 year
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Avast! A page of dubiously coloured Sonic OVA doodles...
They are everything to me <3
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