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gg-astrology · 4 years

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Can you tell us 10 things about you? and about ur friends irl? How u met them/ how long u know them/ what u like to do with them? This is gonna sound nosy but how's ur love life hdjsks LISTEN YOU'RE LIKE MY DREAM BEST FRIEND AND I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU AND ACT LIKE WE'RE TOTES HOMIES OKAY IM A VIRGO SUN PISCES MOON smh a girl is cURIOUS AND (platonically) IN LOVE WITH YOU 😖❤❤❤❤

Hey there!! 💕💓❤️ Oh wow!!!! 💕💓❤️💕💓❤️ Don’t worry this is fine!! I’m actually -- like, really happy and giddily flustered you’d want to get to know me!? 💕💓❤️ I’m really flattered and really grateful/touched aaaaaaa only virgo/pisces deserve rights, my current wife is also a virgo/pisces this is obviously some kind of synastry destiny (jk *wink wonk?*)!! 💕💓❤️thank you for caring about me!!! 💕💓❤️💕💓❤️💕💓❤️💕💓❤️

Yeah sure!! 💕💓❤️I can tell you more things about me!! 💕💓❤️

Disclaimer? I think it’s good for the audience to know where I’m coming from and who I am? I just think transparency/knowing who you’re talking to is important because knowing who I am, can also help you and me see where my flaws are and where I may be coming from! 💕💓❤️ Or what I provide, but where I might miss my mark somewhere, y know? 💕💓❤️ Not to say you have to judge me, I just don’t see the point in not just being who I am and saying yeah I can see where I took the L there. It’s just-- better? for future endeavors as well? So here we are?

More about me? In sections?

10 things about me?

I’ll start with this since it’s the shortest!

This may come off as totally random but I do better in colder climate than hotter ones -- even though I currently live in a tropical island

I used to live in the US!

I actually have a designated place where I go to sit, open up my laptop and answer asks from tumblr. I sit outside my little patio and stare out at my garden, and then answer qs from here!

This means I’m always subjected to the Wild Life coming at me unexpectedly sometimes, but my cat also visits me at my table! So it balances out!

My favourite drink is milk but I like plant-based ones, or rice milk? Or the lactose free ones! They’re delicious!

Cherries are my favourite snacks but I usually get them once every 3 months -- so the result is I don’t tend to snack often. This is by design of me trying to Not Snack + using my pickiness to weaponize against myself and my eating habits.

To unwind I watch cat/animal videos on youtube before I go to sleep - it’s not very effective because I have to keep my eyes open to see, plus I always end up making cooing noises at the screen -- so I’m not sure when if it’s actually making me sleepy or not. But it’s working so far so I’m continuing to do it.

I have very specific knowledge of certain things in very acute details + link/resources of further studies on the topic, but otherwise I have 0.5 braincells most of the time, just a lot of Forbidden Knowledge.

I have a folder of cursed memes and that’s all you need to know about my sense of humour I think?

Love life?

I am currently single! 💕💓❤️ Gf application is always open! 💕💓❤️ However, I’d like everyone of you to know I’m a 95 liner and I will not accept applications from those born after 98′ 💕💓❤️

Although I’m bi + had ex-bf before... I am (as of right now) on the fence about men personally in my personal life (disclaimer) because I’ve got a week of quarantine, thus I haven’t been doing the do and can think clearly for once. I am contemplating. Men. And the necessity in life. Y know?

Although my love life is free!! I am not excused from the occasional panic of having a crush (annually). I’m lucky enough to go through it just once every year, but every time it happens I am an absolutely clown + always in turmoil. It’s what happens when you’re a sag venus who can’t control your p***y brain. Luckily, my crush just have to insult me or make me explain things from my past and then I’d be too traumatize to crush on them again. It’s quite effective, and works out best for all of us! 💕💓❤️

I’ll refrain from talking about my ex because I know I have a habit of recounting the good and being mushy. Even if we ended it on rocky terms. So! I’ll save everyone from that. 💕💓❤️

Friends (expanded, clarifications?)

The ones I mention on the blog are usually

taurus/taurus,

cancer/cancer,

leo/libra,

leo/cap (x2),

virgo/sag,

libra/aries (x2),

scorpio/sag,

scorpio/cap,

sag/taurus,

pisces/scorpio,

pisces/aqua,

Oof that’s alot.. This might be better to outline in a timeline format... so leo/libra, scorpio/sag, libra/aries and partially virgo/sag are whom I grew up for the majority of my childhood-teenage life! 💕💓❤️

They obviously made a very big impact on me! 💕💓❤️ They’re with me through thick/thin, leo/libra (sag rising) is the extrovert of the bunch. He’s one of my best friends, close guy friend, most of the time I too find him a little exasperating because he’s.. well its his problem so nevermind, but he’s also very endearing! 💕💓❤️ If it wasn’t for him-- well, there’s also another leo I thought was very endearing in a little brother kind of way. So leos to me have a very positive influence in my life, they’re very cute especially when they ask for your attention. I think they are like puppies/kitties when they are needy, and their blatant way of just being themselves always makes me feel refreshed + I admire them for it. In the end, I’m totally heart-eyes endeared for Leos! 💕💓❤️

Scorpio/sag is also my best friend! 💕💓❤️ She’s a taurus rising, and she’s so sweet, kind, chatty and very open/friendly to people! 💕💓❤️ Her, my cousin (who’s also a scorpio but a scorpio/pisces), and quite a few of my other best friends who are scorpios - actually made me realize they’re not like what they’re usually describe as. Maybe that’s just me? But I think they’re very sweet and comforting to be around, not to mention they’re quite supportive and willing to listen when you’re having a tough time with something!! 💕💓❤️The pillar of support and one of the few rare people I don’t mind interacting with (actually crave interacting with them) because of just how chill they are, I wish more people recognize that in a scorpio! 💕💓❤️

Libra/Aries is one of my longest childhood friend, probably from birth! 💕💓❤️ He’s a supportive big brother type figure. But he can be very silly and he doesn’t hold himself so seriously most of the time! 💕💓❤️ Whilst he’s very understanding and quite nosy with others, he tries to be subtle/sleek but he isn’t! I think he’s very endearing when he wants to be, and he deserves someone who loves him lots as well 💕💓❤️ We reunited for the first time in 6 years the other day? And I think we both ended up crying a little and holding hands because we miss each other alot! 💕💓❤️ It was very nice, I think he’s much more emotional (just suppressed) than what people realize! 💕💓❤️ He’s very caring though - like willing to talk you through your problems and make sure you’re taken care of, back on your feet, but also willing to smile scarily at people who’ve hurt you and actually take them to court/yell at them for you. I think its very sweet! 💕💓❤️

Virgo/Sag is someone I hung out with for a short period of time, but kept in contact with periodically throughout my life because we ended up going through similar majors/path in life! 💕💓❤️ She’s someone who’s very caring, wants to take care of you, when she’s endeared by you she makes sure to dote on you often! 💕💓❤️ Actually, she’s born a day after Namjoon I think? But that’s not the point, the thing is - she’s my virgo/sag and when she’s not by my virgo/sag she’s super cool and I can see that many of our friend respects her/think she’s very mature + she’s the Shit! 💕💓❤️ I really admire her too and I think she’s super cool, but more than that, I love how caring and tender she is. She’s the best 💕💓❤️

These are the people I grew up with, and then I went to college and met/lived with Scorpio/Cap + Pisces/Scorpio+Aqua.

Scorpio/Cap and I actually hit it off since the first day? We were in orientation, and we’re both talkative I guess! But in similar ways. He appreciates my bluntness/sense of humour and I like that he’s sarcastic and the only one engaging enough to be around/paying attention to what’s happening. We went to a house party together and then had 1 class together the semester. After that, me and him decided we’d live together off campus (along with our other friend who fell through, I think he’s a Leo?) - whilst we lived together we share majors in the same division, on holidays or at night after class, we’d grab dinner together + walk there, or we’d eat at home and binge watch a marathon he’d pick together. 💕💓❤️ It’s really fun! 💕💓❤️

Both of us like cooking, so he’d make dishes/drinks and I’d do that and we’d coerced each other to hang out in the living space together. Basically, we’re there to force each other to socialize/hang out with people and also encourage each other. It’s very fun! But we also had moments where we’d buy each other dinner/go to art galleries/exhibit together. There’s more serious too of course, like talking about our problems or worrying about stuff. But I think I found someone who looks out for me/I can look out for him, be confidants for each other and not be embarrassed with each other. Besides this, he also found my p0rn collection and suddenly mentioned it when we’re on campus so now I can never unfriend him because he has blackmail material on me. I’m forced to be his friends forever now.

Pisces/Cap and Pisces/Aqua are my roommates after Scorpio/Cap - actually, Pisces/cap invited me to live with them when I was finding a place, it was very fortunate! 💕💓❤️ We’re all close friends because we live in the same hall during first year, plus me and Pisces/cap (and a Gemini friend) would get drunk + go to parties together so!! This is very convenient! 💕💓❤️

Actually.. Pisces/cap, me and Gemini friend.. I went with Gemini friend to buy his apartment with him (along with his friends, I’m good friends with them too) and Pisces/cap went with him to buy furnitures lmao! 💕💓❤️ And then me and Pisces/cap moved in together, although I didn’t room with them. I roomed with Pisces/Aqua whom till this date is my favourite roommate I’ve ever lived with! 💕💓❤️

It’s a little messy with Pisces/Cap but not in a? bad way? at all? Like we’re close friends who still talk often, but they did confess once over the holidays, and I turned them down (that was when I was about to move in) - we did make out along with pisces/aqua but like.. that’s... I guess that’s normal for college y know? We did a couple projects together for their class, like a comic about me and gemini friend, poems, photography, I drew them something. And I think they did have something with Gemini friend as well but! Gemini friend moved away on the last year so it never went anywhere there.

But these are all good memories we had together and it’s not like-- bad at all, I don’t ever think badly at them for it because it was honest to them/for them, it was their emotions and tenderness from the heart? I can’t ever look down on anyone for that or judge them for being true to themselves, I actually think they’re very brave to be able to heal themselves and process things especially involving emotions like that. I also think these are all precious and honest memories, being friends with them definitely helped me grow my EQ by so much. Without them, I’d be very close-minded today! 💕💓❤️

Pisces/aqua is my roommate for a long time, and I love them to bits too! 💕💓❤️ They have two cats, both I love so so much and would sacrifice getting up for very often! 💕💓❤️ More than that, Pisces/aqua is so smart and able to pick things up immediately! It’s honestly very admirable, how they pierce things together. Whether it’s tarot or astrology, they’re the one who got me into this actually? 💕💓❤️ It was their interest before it became mine through proxy or maybe osmosis lmao, but they’re quite judgey and sometimes have a ? idk, superiority complex/elitist attitude towards stuff sometimes? So I never really talked about it much with them because it can get really frustrating sometimes 💕💓❤️ I do love them lots though, I can be ignorant of a lot of things and really slow on the uptake, but they’re very nice and kind and patient with me - honestly they’re as patient as a saint sometimes with me. And I’m really really thankful to them for it! 💕💓❤️ They’re getting married this year to a Scorpio! 💕💓❤️

Taurus/taurus and Cancer/cancer are my college best friends. Actually we hang out outside of class too! 💕💓❤️ I celebrated cancer/cancer’s birthday with them and their friends/roommates and it’s really fun. Heres why it’s -- like, momentous. It’s because my college classmates are more like colleagues or co-workers, so we don’t usually have that kind of camaraderie outside of first year. Plus, we’re all kind of working or busy with our private life outside of class - so it’s hard to reconvene that with who you know in classrooms.

They like their private life separated from the college one, which is what I prefer as well. I really adore them though, since we have a major that usually makes us get little to no sleep and have to stay at school at night-till morning most nights (for programs on the computer or printing facilities, rip) -- they’re the one who would either stay up with me, working together at the same table and we can ask each other for fresh eyes on our work. Or they’d motivate me to go home and not be stupid to stay at school. Or they’d drive me home so they know I get back safely/on time. It’s just -- I adore them so much they’re very very good! 💕💓❤️

Taurus/Taurus is also a college best friend whom I befriended later on in the years, they’re really sweet! 💕💓❤️ We have more of a friendship where we spend time outside together, walking in the city trying out a new cake store or just going back to their place to play games or talk about what else we have going on in our lives. They’re really busy!! Since they’re involved in church activities, they travel to another town an hour away every sunday - their dedication to their work, school and church (AND spending time with their fiance’s family + fiance) is amazing! 💕💓❤️ They also got me my first job at the firm they’re working in, in our last years - I made sure they’re not too tired and get their work done on time so they don’t rush their finished project. Or give better advice if the teacher is making them fume. I really like them lots too, we had alot of fun together AND they’re a foodie! 💕💓❤️

There’s another Libra/Aries whom I knew from college, while I was still living with Scorpio/Cap - I was in another town/not the same town as the Pisces back then. But Libra/Aries was close and she’d come by often! We’d travel the city together, lay on the lawn, go to parks together or exhibit. They’re very proactive and we spend a lot of time talking about work and projects, personal interests, when we watch movies together - we’d spend time sitting in cafes after watching them to talk for hours/until closing about the movie ( ‘we have alot to unpack’) -- they’re a lot of fun to talk to because they’re just as intense about stuff! 💕💓❤️ And their interest is genuine, give good hugs, a little too loud for our cats but she means well! 💕💓❤️

This is brief recount of everyone, mostly focusing on activities we did together but knowing them as people obviously made a big impression on me! 💕💓❤️

Leo/Caps are people I met since I finished college/working now, they’re my two admins on the blog actually! 💕💓❤️So internet friends, but I really click with and they’re soothing + fun to be around when I’m home/anywhere! 💕💓❤️

Sag/Taurus is also another internet friend, I’ve known her for a year now? But man, every conversation is an adventure and she’s so fun to be around! 💕💓❤️ Also very sweet and an extremely kind person, in a fire sign kind of way. Which means a lot of gawking from me and very loud laughs. But yes! 💕💓❤️ Very good people! 💕💓❤️

I do have friends from work... but well we’re not close enough for me to actually consider them good friends/talk about them personally? They’re nice! But I have yet to form a more positive opinion about them - it’s positive and negative, so I’ll see who survives and come through as a person I’d like to hang out with outside of work. 💕💓❤️

To Virgo/Pisces anon:

Here’s my best friend application do I make the cut please reply 💕💓❤️

#about me #phew this took a while to answer!#virgo/pisces anon #are we best friends now pls tell me #anon #asks

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ingenves · 5 years

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ok its ya girl back at it, same deal ! if u wanna plot just HMU or LIKE THIS and i’ll come to you ! wes is my father & u can peep his pinterest board HERE !

⌈ chris pine, cismale, he/him ⌋ hey, is it WESLEY BIGELOW that you’re looking for? you know, the THIRTY-SIX year old CARPENTER. typically i see them hanging around GRISTOL DOCKS so you could try there! i hear they’ve been in living in PRINCETOWN for THIRTY-SIX YEARS. gristol wouldn’t be the same without them, right? anyway, whenever i see them they make me think of waking up before dawn, an old rowboat sitting in still water & a kitchen full of fresh produce.

tw: car accident & illness

this mans has lived in town his entire life!!! his parents, william and rose bigelow owned a historic farm . willy & rose were high school sweethearts, a shotgun wedding joining them together after rose ended up pregnant with their first child at the age of 19. while rose’s parents were furious with their daughter for being so reckless, william’s father was more than happy to offer them a place to stay and lend a hand taking care of the baby that would soon be on the way.

despite the circumstances, wes was never treated as an accident or a mistake. he grew up in his grandpa’s farmhouse with a loving family. the bigelow family followed some pretty traditional gender roles. wes’ dad and his grandpa would wake at the crack of dawn and work out in the field until sunset while his mother hung around the house to take care of him, doing laundry, making dinner, taking him to the park, everything.

from a young age he was encouraged to help out on the farm but being the mama’s boy he was, he was far more eager to help his mom out with the cooking and the laundry. he was close with his grandfather as well, the two always working on little projects together like building a tree house, birdhouses, his own bee house………………….a lot of houses

but wes was never rly close with his father. william wasn’t much of an emotional or talkative guy, usually just sitting there in stern silence and working the day away. a bit of a scary guy despite not ever doing anything scary?? he’s just an ominous guy that doesn’t rly seem impressed by anything so wes never rly knew where he stood u know.

the one time wes ever really felt close to his father was when they would take little weekend fishing trips together, even though they didn’t really speak. just the fact that william took his time to teach wes how to do everything and didn’t get mad or frustrated when he lost a lure or let a fish go by accident was enough to like…..send the message. that was his way of showing his love u know.

the second bigelow child was welcomed when wes was a kid and while at first he was jealous that his new baby sister was getting all the attention, having a baby around the house was kind of fun. she’d make funny faces and funny noises and he grew to love her pretty quickly. he used to always say that his baby sister was the best thing that happened to him. when she got older, he taught her how to make mud pies and how to play pranks on grandpa who was a rly good sport, all things considered.

car accident & death tw !! the winter of ‘94 would prove to be the worst winter of wes’ entire life. on the way back home to pick up a christmas tree from a nearby farm, the family’s old pick up hit a patch of black ice and ended up flipped into a ditch. it was a bad wreck. luckily his grandpa and sister were safe at home during the time of the crash, but wes and his parents weren’t so lucky, his mother being the unluckiest of the bunch. they were stranded in the middle of the road for two hours before anyone showed up for help and by the time they arrived, it was too late for rose, who got the worst of the injuries. doa at the hospital while wes and his dad walked away with mostly minor injuries. that year, there was no christmas tree and no presents. christmas dinner was replaced with takeout and no one said a word.

illness & death tw !! not long after rose passed away, grandpa bigelow got some bad news. lung cancer that no one really saw coming. just a few months after the diagnosis they were having another funeral for another member of the bigelow clan.

it was a tough year, but they got through it. wes did his job to step up and do all the things his dad couldn’t do; all the things his mother taught him. he expected all of it to make his dad more closed off but it had the reverse effect and for the first time in his entire life, wes and his father had heart to heart conversations.

jump forward to high school and things finally felt like they were back to normal. william wasn’t dating yet but he wasn’t being all that anti-social, either.

wes discovered quickly he was the kind of person that other people liked and he was quite popular??? he made good grades, played football, dating the coolest girl in school (in his own opinion ofc), everything kind of fell into place for him in high school

and then after high school he…………didn’t rly know what to do asdj;fdksgfkdlj he never went to college and decided work around town doing odd jobs and saving some money so he could go off and travel and live his life as a young person craving adventure.

he was gone for abt a year or so before coming back home & he’s just been here ever since, doin his thing

started working with a family friend in his shop, doing what he loved and building things n working with his hands u know and hasn’t stopped doing what he loves ever since

he owns his own shop now & builds custom furniture

the….personality section has Arrived

he’s quite the Charming guy but he talks WAY too much

definitely the kind of guy who will just…..talk about himself non-stop without even realizing it ?? he needs to get his Ego in check even after all these years smh

buT he’s very good at making conversation and is rly a friendly guy!!!! will talk and joke with anyone just because……why not ?? it makes his day when ppl talk to him so he will talk to u even if u dont feel the same way

highkey the kind of person to start up a random conversation w a stranger in the grocery story just because

lowkey uncomfortable with feelings and still isn’t super great at expressing emotions and his thoughts but ya boi is trying his best

but he’s rly good at picking up on signals. he can’t express his own emotions but he’s like….pretty in tune with other ppl

a very platonically affectionate guy. loves hugging his buddies and telling them how much he loves & appreciates them

and now for the lil extra tidbits

he’s got two dogs. a german shepherd named mulder & a pomeranian named scully sfddgfhgfg and he strategically uses his dogs to flirt w ladies when they’re out on a walk LMAO

he’s got a 6 year old daughter named aspen with a woman he is no longer dating ( im prob gna put this as a wc on the main so if u want this....hmu???? ) but they are still v close and spend a lot of time together & he loves aspen more than anything :’)

he’s very much a Dad. dad jokes all the time. endless shitty puns for everyonE

the man loves a turtleneck. he can’t keep his hands off a good ass sweater u know ??

he loves to cook and is v good at it, since he’s been cooking his entire life. he is the self-proclaimed kind of bbq and honestly???? he’s always throwing lil bbq parties & they are a hit :/ u know he be winning contests w his grilling bro

obviously.........a handyman. the house he lives in now, he built himself after tearing down the old on. he built himself a nice big deck and everything so he can have a nice place to host bbqs and everyone will come compliment him on hard work and enjoy his fantastic recipes

he runs his own business building & selling furniture!!!! need a shelf installed??? give him a call. dog chewed up ur table leg??? give him a call. house burned down???? give him a call he’ll build u a new one.

what’s better than this ??????????? guys bein dudes

he rly likes going to the movies. lowkey loves disney but pretends he only cares bc his daughter likes it but……….u know he knows the words to every song

tragically heterosexual ://///////

he loves strong coffee & he loves beer & occasionally he loves a good book & a nice game of chess

did i mention he is such a dad bc………..he is such a dad

someone hold his rough sandpaper ass hands

#gristolintro #ok i yam off to bed now ashdjf #will b lurking mobile for a bit tho !!

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abyss-mal-blog1 · 5 years

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current mind-space//word vomit

it’s amazing how much can change in a few days, but it hasn’t been a week since my finals ended and i already felt so different. i have been doing f45 everyday this week (if not then some kind of workout, but i’ve really been into that recently). i am feeling so much better now without deadlines, sometimes i don’t know if i function better under pressure or not. i guess not, but then it’s amazing how much i can do and achieve under pressure. i need the right amount of pressure, and this semester it has been a little difficult for me to get around that.

last friday was kinda my last day of finals, i just had an essay to submit, and i am disappointed in myself and my work ethic because i submitted it at 9pm, went to my cousin’s (disappointing) party, and then professor emailed me to say that she cannot read Pages format (seriously smh @ my tardiness!!!), only got back at 1am that night and sent my mediocre essay. i am a little sad about it because i know that is not my 100%. idk why but college so far has just been a series of 80% effort. this paper was an interesting one, on airbnb, on the sharing economy, it’s a performance studies paper where i analyze the hospitality platform in terms of host-user relationship, parasitism and (attempted) to talk about free online labor. it is a little too late now but i kinda want to work on it again and like, submit for feedback. maybe ill ask taylor.

last saturday was kinda meh, i agreed to go to a *social* kinda event at a bar/club at chelsea, held for Asian-ivy-alumni-people that yanlin invited me too. it was at up&up and honestly a little...i didn’t enjoy it at all. the music sucked, the people were either too dorky or gross or old or weird, and the whole time i just kept saying to myself, “never again”. they said it was open bar but they only served absolut, which was shit. and then my friend’s two friends were...i feel sorry that this was their first clubbing experience. at the beginning my reaction was look at all these ivy alumni! get hitched with one of them for ~da connectsx~ (and nothing else) but no kidding i was actually interested in talking to them just to get to know what people who graduated from ivies are up to, and what are they doing at such events...and are they actually enjoying themselves because it was really kinda gross. met my friend’s friend who seemed like a really smart engineer (he asked for my number the next day lol), and a german dude at the bar who didn’t want to get me a drink. all i needed that night was a drink.....(i’m glad i didn’t drink tho because recently drinking has made me feel all kinds of bad) we had ramen after at ramen-ya (most probably the worst ramen and charsiew i’ve had but what can we do at 3am and my friend wanted noodle and soup...)

on sunday i KNow i should have left my house earlier to workout but i didn’t. i was angry at myself that i didn’t. instead, i stayed at home and emotion-ate. i must have eaten more green bean soup than my stomach would have liked. what else...avocado? i remember..two bananas? god. this was the day i felt like i was n’s boyfriend because i had to do what she wanted to do. i know i had agreed on going, but at that point i really wanted to go thrifting or something. i mean when i got to central park it was fine and things were good but the whole day just felt like i was kinda pulled into doing something that wasn’t my first choice of plans, not that i didn’t enjoy myself lying under the sun at the park. it just felt like i was accompanying someone. i was half an hour late to meet her as well, and half heartedly got a burrito-wrap at newsbar. if you think about it it is really kinda funny, we’re just buying food and taking the subway to this grass patch 50 blocks away. we didn’t walk much, we literally only stayed at a little grassy slope overlooking the baseball pitch. anyway we went to a dance class after (the class was an hour long but i felt like n had asked me about when and what time we should book the classes for more than an hour by text so i just got really sick of it) i rushed home and got dinner with my uncle who’s in town for my cousin’s graduation. i was surprised that he chose the same japanese restaurant again, after dissing it half a year ago we ate here. the omakase was crazy and it cost 230 per person. (for the most expensive set) it was also kinda dumb because you aren’t allowed to order a different omakase set from anyone else - everyone on the table has to order the same - because of “timing”. i wonder if this is how it is in japanese omakase etiquette, but in any case it really earned them a hefty amount because my uncle decided to get 230 for all of us. qiyang didn’t like and said qiqi had bad taste, hahaha. the food wasn’t bad, i mean it’s japanese fusion, but the prices were way too steep for the taste. anyway enough about the food, during the dinner i think we talked about many things though. i kinda wanted to talk to my uncle individually because i think he is the only one who knows about ah gong, but he was sick, and i could tell he was exhausted. my aunt got a little impatient because i didn’t arrange plans to take their furniture and they were going to throw all of them away and it was actually the first time i’ve seen her get so worked up - but at the same time trying to control her emotions - because she was talking to me. i could tell she was annoyed though but i tried not to take it personally, and arranged it tomorrow.

arranging the moving stuff was kinda last minute, i was walking to the library for work one day and i saw a truck that said MakeSpace. i assumed it was a kind of moving company and so i looked them up. they seemed to be pretty okay in terms of their services and so i decided to try them out. confirmation and setting up an appointment went pretty smoothly, except for the part where the guy i think his name was joseph, asked me to give my credit card details over the phone. idk why i did that! i stopped though, and asked him why, to which he replied he wanted to key in with the coupon code. this service has so much gimmicks within the first 2-3 minutes on the phone he was already telling me about how the first pick up is free, and that he will deduct 100$ off the first month...when people give you discounts too easily it just feels like a ploy and a thing they give to everyone, it’s not anything special and it’s probably calculated inside whatever we have to pay. anyway, i was just thinking it would be cheaper (assuming the maximum that i would have to pay is ~$500, as i confirmed with them on the phone yesterday), it’d still be cheaper than starting an apartment lease now and going through the trouble of finding two subletters.

well. idk, it’s also easy to have things all moved in, i have to find a place to store my perishables!

moving is so much work, and storing things. this reminds me of my paper on airbnb and about the digital nomad lifestyle. it is interesting though, that this is what it has become. but the homogenized aesthetic is something i really cannot stand, in airbnb, in coffeeshops around the world..i am sure you know what i’m talking about. a new york times writer did something about this - he termed it “Airspace” - and apparently it originated from Brooklyn. I guess that’s where the art/avant-garde stuff started. well. keep a look out im gonna write a blogpost about that

moving on

nat came to sleepover on sunday night and a few days after because the school kicks you out of the dorms you pay so much for right after your final ends. i forgot if we did something fun but i probably just fell asleep.

on monday i think i went to f45 and did cardio at Dumbo with Gi. he seems like a pretty nice trainer, the first time i went it was him and another girl Bertha (i think my first f45 was last tuesday) and i felt like i had two personal trainers with me - Gi was cheering me on and Bertha was doing it with me. it felt like such a good workout, one of the best ive had in a while. then work, where i arranged the movers stuff. i also realized i bought the wrong date for my flight ticket as my friends and had to buy one more...............

tuesday was the same f45 in the morning, and the bobst after. didn’t really get much work done at bobst. oh i also viewed a 3BR flex at 160. hella expensive and small, and dates didn’t work out anyway. also the broker who brought us to view the apartment was a very nice tall french man and his name was jean-francois which i couldn’t pronounce and asked nat but still called him jean as in jeen instead of john. this is why i have to learn french. you’re embarrassing. i also went to the itp/ima spring show with shubham which was super cool. there were many cool ideas, and i just wonder if i could create something like that. i didn’t get to see all of the exhibits which i regret, but i remember a few notable projects. one was an installation made with keyboards that randomly clicks, but when you hold your phone up it’ll stop. it’s made using 3d gestures. there’s also one at a gallery for surveillance, this team had a thing they call facebox, and it’s literally a box, that when you open it has a webcam that would capture your face, find you on facebook, and print out an invoice/receipt on how much you have earned for this giant tech company. what else...an AR project that when you scan a food, it shows you where the food comes from. nat said that she would love it if menus have something they could scan and then have pictures appear in ~holographic~ format, or maybe in the nearer future something on your phone that shows you a picture of the picture of the food. but isn’t it a surprise tho? sometimes the fun’s in the surprise, you read the description, you know what are the foods you’ll eat, leaving room to imagine or be surprised by how the chef puts it together! anyway, went for dinner with nat and jenny - got vegan shwarma (definitely wasn’t worth $14) and went to get crepes with will after.

wednesday we were gonna go to the dmv but we weren’t prepared. nat also needed to get her passport and she was lazy. wow the number of times i mentioned her, it feels like she’s my boyfriend at this point. talked to famz, sister, and beatrix. am currently considering if i should even go to beijing or just go straight home. fuck. went to bobst for work but no one was there i was just really sleepy. viewed an apartment at 55 morton (it’s a nice quiet residential street that seems to be tucked away from the loud cars and bars and people) then i went to f45 again-varsity!!! cardio!!!, walked across brooklyn bridge (a little regret although i wanted to walk, but my bag was heavy and there were too many tourists to brisk walk)

also the reason for this is that after my soba/miso/salad/shrimp dinner last night i was just watching a bunch of netflix shows and it was probably the caffeine from puerto rican roasting company - the barista made me a chai cappuccino with almond milk (3 SHOTS!!!)

me and nat couldn’t sleep, i really think i slept for an hour. i watched so many different shows, yoko and john’s documentary, while we were young, anthony bourdain, i was seriously flipping through all the shows and alternating between amazonprme and youtube and netflix and i even tried watching peaceful cuisine and making the brightness lower and had the sleep mode on and wow i just couldn’t sleep

so yeah the birth of this word vomit

i am going to create more things

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cannedapricot · 6 years

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Christmas Shopping with! Yoon Jisung

another installment of the chirstmas collab with @alliwannado-w1 and @jihoonslattee ft. toy store worker! yoon jisung!!

jisung works at a toy store in a mall on the second floor

and he loves it

he loves seeing children’s faces glowing in happiness after entering the store

he loves helping children find the perfect toy

jiSUNG’S JUST FULL OF LOVE FOR WHAT HE DOES

when children start throwing tantrums, jisung’s the first person to rush over

the child stops crying after 5 seconds because thE FACES JISUNG MAKES TO CHEER THEM UP ARE LEDGENDARY

co-worker! sungwoon swears that jisung would marry his job if he could

everyone who’s ever visited this specific mall knows of yoon jisung

i mean, he’s the resident sunshine who glows so brightly whenever he smiles that everyone in the mall stops to wear sunglasses

he’s also the reason why every kid ever wants to go to that one toy shop lol

the boss wanted to make jisung the mascot at one point but jisung was like,

“oh no!! i’m probably going to scare people away from the shop haha!”

and that’s how sungwoon was forced into being the mascot because he was “smol and fluffy”

jisung never lets sungwoon live because of it

“oh look!!! sungwoon’s on our poster again!!11!111″

“...TEAR IT DOWN”

chirstmas is jisung’s favorite holiday

part of it was because of the snow and quality family time

but mostly it was because mORE SMILEY KIDS WOULD WALK INTO THE SHOP

CHEEKS RED WITH COLD

AND EYES GLEAMING WITH EXCITEMENT

the shop has this thing where the staff can wrap your presents for you

and everyone h a t e s being put on gift wrapping duty

because its??? so??? boring???

they’d much rather do something else

aka find a corner where the boss can’t see you and go on your phone smh

so when the boss calls a meeting and announces that the gift wrapping duty is back!!!

all he gets are groans in response

except from jisung though

he puts his arm straight up and with sparkling eyes, he says

“I VOLUNTEER”

“uh ok i guess jisung’s on gift duty for the fourth year in a row”

but daniel and jaehwan are also selected for different shifts

jisung nearly has a heart attack when he hears that jaehwan’s also on gift duty

beCAUSE THAT BOY CAN’T WRAP GIFTS FOR SHIT

so jisung spends his lunch break teaching jaehwan how to wrap a gift properly and prettily :’)

jaehwan tries to learn because he doesn’t want to deal with screaming kids if he wraps their gift shittily

it doesn’t turn out as perfect as jisung’s but it’ll have to do :’’’)

jisung’s also the only person who happily wears the santa hat uniform addition

jiSUNG’S WILL HAPPILY DO ANYTHING FOR THIS SHOP

HE LOVES THE SHOP WITH HIS WHOLE HEART SIDVBIS

even if the pay isn’t as high as other jobs, jisung’s content :’)

he’s such an angel i love him

you worked at a local kindergarten!

you’ve only been working for a couple of months but the kids there absolutely adore you!!

you’d step in the classroom and everyone would rush over to hug you

the kindergarten once had a popularity vote among the teachers and you ranked first even though you were new :””)

everyone wanted to be in your class

and the other teachers are lowkey offended

it was a tradition every year to bring the kids on a trip to the mall for them to write small wish lists to send to santa :’’’’’)

the kids were thrilled obviously

“sCHOOL TRIP TIME WHEEEEEEEE”

it took a while for them to calm down

but they eventually did

you’ve never been to the mall in this area,,, so you’re kinda scared that you’re gonna get lost or lose one of the kids etc

you tried getting out of it

“hey uh cough cough minhyun? cough”

“yeah?”

“sneeze i think i’m down with a cold”

“oh no!!!111!!1!1 would you like to take a few days off???”

“yes-”

“is what you think i’d say right? too bad we’re already low on staff as it is we don’t need another ‘sick’ one”

THERE GOES THAT PLAN OUT THE WINDOW

you knew that there was no point in arguing anymore :’)

on the day you were a nervous wreck

you had planned to go around the mall yesterday but that didn’t happen

thanks to your close friend suddenly dropping by

yoU WERE SWEATING AND YOUR EYES WERE DARTING EVERYWHERE

EVEN THE KIDS THOUGHT SOMETHING WAS OFF

“miss y/n? are you okay?”

“o-OH YEAH I’M FINE TOMMY”

WIPES SWEAT

after herding the kids into the bus, you tried to make a run for it

but minhyun catches you with his signature “where do you think you’re going” smile on his face

then proceeds to fling you onto the bus

upon reaching the mall, the kids immediately screamed to go visit the toy store

having no choice but to do so, you bring your little group of kids towards the toy shop on the second floor

while looking at the map you have on your phone lmao

you let out a sigh in relief when you reach the store without anything happening

you tell the kids not to wander off by their own and stick close together

entering the shop, you catch a certain worker’s eye 👀👀

i mean you would catch my eye as well

it’s not everyday someone walks into a shop with 10 kids around them

but of course the shop expected your kindergarten to visit this time of year

and that particular worker slides up to your party while in the lego section

“hi! i’m jisung! is there anything you’re looking for?”

you were about to respond but the kids responded before you could

“wHERE ARE THE BARBIES???”

“BRING ME A STUFFED BEAR PLEASE”

p a ni c s

“i’m so sorry- n O EMILY STOP CLINGING ON THE WORKER’S LEG”

jisung lets out a hearty laugh,

“don’t worry! i’m used to it”

anD BOY WAS HIS LAUGH ATTRACTIVE

is it getting hot in here or is it just jisung? 👀👀

jisung squats down to the little girl’s height and talks to her in the s o f t e s t tone

and you think that’s he’s possibly the cutest man you’ve ever m e t

“miss y/n!!!! stop staring at him!!”

buoVOUVODUV???????

jisung’s draws his attention from the little girl to look at you

yOU GLOW BRIGHT RED

“I WASN’T- UH- I WAS LOOKING AT THAT STUFFED RABBIT BEHIND YOU YEAH”

AND JISUNG CHUCKLES AT YOUR OBVIOUSLY FLUSTERED FACE

deciding not to make you glow any more red, he says,

“hey, i’ll help you deal with the kids today yeah?”

“OHMYGOSH THANK YOU SO MUCH”

BECAUSE

FINALLY

SOMEONE WHO KNOWS THE MALL WELL

“i’ll go tell my boss!”

he doesn’t

he tells sungwoon to cover for him

“heY YOU TOLD ME TO POSTPONE MY DATE TO WORK HOW COME YOU GET TO-”

covERS SUNGWOON’S MOUTH

“it’s not a da t e”

sungwoon rolls his eyes

“sure ok”

and so jisung joins your party!!

y’all look like a cute family with 10 kids :’)

throughout the day, jisung’s interaction with the kids and his funny personality made you feel like melting

was it possible for a man to be this adorable??

you didn’t know but,,

jisung was also melting for you too :’)))

so when minhyun calls you and says that it’s time to leave

jisung doesn’t want to let you go

neither did you tbh

so as you herd the kids into the bus once again, jisung pulls you back for a moment

“hey,,,, uh,,,, have you done your christmas shopping yet?”

“not yet!! i’m planning to do so this sunday”

“oh!! great!! um,,, i was wondering if you wanted to do it together? sunday’s my day off too,,,”

hE WAS AVOIDING EYE CONTACT AS HE ASKED YOU AND YOU WERE SQUEALING INSIDE

“yES! I MEAN-- sure!”

and then jisung looks at you with the whole galaxy in his eyes

his cheeks were flushed but you had no idea whether it was because of the weather or because he was flustered

“REALLY???”

you reply with a smile and a nod of your head

he then digs through his pockets for a pen

and asks you to write your number on his hand

the pen was in the shape of a giraffe

minhyun screams for you as soon as you finished writing the last digit

“i’ll text you!!”

jisung yells as you run towards the bus, waving at him with a huge smile

he does

and you two don’t stop texting until sunday

“y/n! over here!!”

you rush over to the waiting jisung

“i’m sorry did you have to wait for a long time?”

he smiles and claims that he just got here

and you two head into the mall

as soon as you two step in, you guys were surrounded by couples who were also christmas shopping

and it felt awkward for the first time since you’ve known jisung

clEARS THROAT

“so,,, y/n, where do you want to go first?”

you randomly point at a stationary store

and you two exit a few minutes later

with a bunch of bags in hand

“i knEW WE SHOULDN’T HAVE GONE INTO THAT STORE”

hOLD IN YOUR TEARS Y/N, YOUR WALLET WILL BE O K

jisung laughs

“THIS ISN’T SOMETHING TO LAUGH OVER”

“sorRY”

HUFFS

and you two continue your raid of the mall

exiting a new shop with more bags each time :”)

at one point y’all entered a furniture shop and accidentally walked into the beds section

the worker there mistakes you for a couple and smirks at you two 👀👀

yOU TWO SUDDENLY REALIZE WHAT THE SMIRK MEANT

AND HURRIED OUT OF THE STORE

y’all also entered the toy store jisung works at

and jisung’s co-workers are all staring at you two

especially sungwoon and jaehwan who followed you two around the shop talking loudly about how jisung was boyfriend material

“DID YOU KNOW JISUNG IS GREAT AT COOKING RAMEN???”

“OH REALLY???”

“YEAH WHOEVER MARRIES HIM WOULD BE LUCKY”

JISUNG WAS SWEATIN G

WHY ARE HIS FRIENDS SO EMBARRASSING

“y/N LETS LEAVE THE SHOP”

“what- i haven’t finished-”

PUSHES YOU OUT

but doesn’t forget to buy you a gift from the shop

after wandering around the mall more, you two end up in front of the giant christmas tree

the lights casted shadows around

and you turn to face jisung, finding him looking up at the tree with those stars in his eyes

then he turns to face you with that huge smile of his

and bOY HIS FACE ILLUMINATED BY THE LIGHT WHILE HE SMILES HNNNNG

then he suddenly pulls out a rabbit soft toy

“merry christmas y/n! here’s your present!!”

this was the same rabbit you had claimed to be staring at while you were actually staring at jisung

“you were staring at this the other day right?”

yOU BURST INTO LAUGHTER

jisung thought you were laughing at his gift :(

“IM NOT LAUGHING AT THE GIFT, I’M JUST LAUGHING BECAUSE,,”

“because??”

“I WASN’T ACTUALLY STARING AT THE RABBIT, I WAS STARING AT YOU,,,,, THANK YOU ANYWAYS THOUGH”

and yOU SNATCH THE RABBIT FROM HIS HANDS

TO HIDE YOUR REDDENING FACE

jisung’s face lights up at this

“y/n?”

“yes?”

“what do you think about today being our first day?”

“??first day??”

“yeah, as a couple”

STATIONARY SHOPS MAKE ME GO BROKE OSFDGBOSB

also this was lowkey kinda shit,,,,, jisung’s actually a ray of sunshine in human form and i love him so much anyone who says he’s ugly can come fight me

#im serious about yoon jisung being the light of life #i love him so much #wanna one #yoon jisung #produce 101 #christmas shopping with! yoon jisung #broduce 101 #wanna one scenarios #kpop #kpop scenarios #mmo #mmo yoon jisung #yoon jisung scenarios #wanna one imagines #wanna one aus #yoon jisung imagines #yoon jisung au

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samanthasroberts · 5 years

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Vanderpump Rules Season 7 Episode 3 Recap · Betches

What’s good, Sexy Unique People? It’s your favorite recapper, Sgt. Olivia Betchson, here. I’m here one whole day early to recap Vanderpump Rules season 7 episode 3, which got moved to a new day for some reason. Smh, you think you can depend on something, like you have been doing for the past FOUR YEARS, and then they go changing it for no discernible reason. Is it so much to ask for my show to be on at a consistent time? Is it?? There’s so little I can rely on anymore in this world.

This week picks right back up at Pride, after James has called Katie fat. He yells at Katie to “lose some f*cking weight” before storming off and telling some guy that Katie can go f*ck herself. Way harsh, Tai.

Scheana is talking about how she doesn’t know if Hope hooked up with James. Which is fair because the only people who know that for sure are Hope, James, and God. And still Scheana gets sh*t for this very uncontroversial opinion. It may be besides the point that James cheats on Raquel a lot, but also, why is this anyone’s business? Scheana is the only one who actually likes and wants to be friends with Raquel, so she’s realistically the only one who is in a place to tell Raquel about any cheating rumors. Everybody else isn’t doing this out of loyalty to Raquel but a desire to f*ck up James’s life. You heard it here first!

Lisa arrives at Pride dressed like she’s going to the Kentucky Derby.

No further comments at this time.

Raquel comes back up to Kristen and Hope and steals Hope away for a second. Raquel asks her to tell her what really happened at Coachella. Hope claims that Coachella is only the tip of the iceberg and she and James were sleeping together for THREE YEARS!! Oh and I’m sorry, this Coachella incident was not at this past year’s Coachella, but it actually happened two years ago.

Me:

I’m sorry, hold the phone. So you mean to tell me that this alleged incident happened years ago, and we’re only just hearing about it now? Hope sat on this information for TWO YEARS?? And she’s bringing it up now as if it’s somehow relevant and current information? Seems extremely suspect. How can you even begin to verify something that happened years ago?? Also, is Raquel really meant to blow up her relationship over something that may or may not have happened two years ago? I’ve gotta say, this is not Kristen’s best work. Try coming through with receipts from this calendar year, hmm?

Stassi calling James an emaciated muppet literally made me spit out my drink. Speaking of said emaciated muppet, James is literally full-on in white Kanye mode. He’s f*cked up, slurring, wandering around and trying to order a pumptini. It’s not good.

Lisa pulls Raquel aside to basically be like “come get ya mans and make sure he doesn’t have another sip of alcohol.” Yeah, that will end well. When has anyone in the history of alcohol successfully stopped a drunk person from doing something stupid? Never. So Raquel confronts James again about the rumors, and all he does is call Hope a f*cking whore. Hmm, so she’s a whore for not sleeping with you? Reminds me of middle school when some girl called me a slut when I hadn’t even kissed a guy yet. Just fun misogyny things!

We leave this with Raquel saying she wants to stay with James for the Instagram exposure.

Raquel and James are trying to put together furniture while discussing the train wreck that was the day before.

Ok so James’s story is that he and Hope hooked up two and a half years ago, before he was with Raquel.

Me:

Right after this, Peter calls James to un-invite him to his birthday. I kind of wonder what Kristen had to blackmail him with in order to get that to happen.

James: Well Tom’s drinks don’t taste like alcohol so it snuck up on me. Raquel: Mmm, no that’s not it.

Yeah no, that’s not what happened here. This is wild because I’ve never even heard Raquel speak this many words before, and I legit have met her in person. I’m into this, though. She says she doesn’t want James to have another sip of alcohol ever again. I’m not going to hold my breath waiting for that to come true, because I don’t wish to asphyxiate. Still, I can respect that she has a more realistic perspective of addiction than Scheana.

Some lady with a pageboy cap shows up to SUR to ask Lisa if she could give her brother a job. OK so it looks like we’re getting another Instagram model added to the cast… who’s probably going to date Scheana. Let’s just hope this guy shows up to the interview wearing pants and that he brings his resume.

Speaking of… Scheana shows up to Peter’s birthday party with Adam, which surprises no one. I’m glad they’ve finally taken their Instagram relationship public. The real question is… can he hang a TV in under 7 minutes?

Stassi is like, annoyed that Scheana doesn’t want to speak on rumors she doesn’t know about (aka James hooking up with Hope). Oh here’s the Stassi I knew and hated from season 5—the one who is only friends with people so long as they agree with her on all things and hate the same people she hates. That’s not loyalty, btw, that’s blind devotion!

Stassi and Ariana are finally joining forces to throw one birthday party. I would have commentary on this, but I knew this happened over the summer so I no longer have anything to say on the matter. Is Instagram ruining Vanderpump Rules? The title of my next think piece.

Ariana: Stassi just kept following me around and being nice to me so I gave up the energy to be bitchy.

Relatable.

Katie, Brittany, Stassi and Ariana are having a girls’ night and not inviting Scheana. Ariana is kind of being a mean girl by being like “yeah well I haven’t seen Scheana lately, it’s on her to work out her issues with Katie and everyone” rather than sticking up for her supposed friend and trying to get her an invite. Who has no loyalty now?? (I keep referencing this because later on this season, Stassi will come at Scheana for her supposed lack of loyalty.)

Jax and Brittany are going to a cheese shop because they’re starting a beer cheese company. a BEER CHEESE COMPANY. Literally watching Brittany act like beer cheese is a novelty you can’t get anywhere but her Meemaw’s basement is f*cking ridiculous. I’ve had beer cheese in Atlanta. I’ve had it in New York. Go to any artisanal brewery and you can probably find a beer cheese dip that comes with a soft pretzel. Damn, now I want a pretzel.

Brittany is going to invite Raquel to girls’ night, basically because she’s been cheated on by her boyfriend too. Let’s also invite Khloé Kardashian and Cardi B to this girls’ night. It’s Cheaters Anonymous up in this bitch.

Jax re: Raquel: Why would you want to be with someone who literally everybody hates?

LOLLLLLLLLLMFAOOOO IS THIS A JOKE?? Pot, meet kettle who everyone hates.

Jax has started his job back at SUR again. Again, what’s it like to have literally no consequences for your actions? MUST BE NICE.

Wait a sec, did Schwartz just call Katie his girlfriend? Yes he did. THAT’S YOUR WIFE! Or have you forgotten?

Schwartz goes to talk to James about calling Katie fat and the convo goes as follows:

Schwartz: Katie isn’t fat she’s sexy and luscious James: I know man Schwartz: Say it. I want you to say it.

You want another man to call your WIFE sexy and luscious? Weird flex, but ok. In predictable Schwartzy fashion, he doesn’t get mad at James or really give him any consequences for what he did. Maybe this is why Kristen has dubbed herself the Karma Police?

It’s girls’ night, and Ariana is SERVING in this see-through red lace number with a red thong. Everyone looks amazing, I’m really loving this. Looking at these outfits has cleared my skin, hydrated my body, and filled up my bank account.

View this post on Instagram

Don’t forget there’s a new #pumprules tonight at 9pm!

A post shared by Katie Maloney-Schwartz (@musickillskate) on Dec 16, 2018 at 1:51pm PST

Meanwhile at guys’ night, Jax comes riding in on a motor scooter. All I could think about was:

Jax announces he and Brittany are business owners, and claims they’re getting patented and whatever. I doubt that. Have you even filed an LLC yet? I’m not saying Jax is a liar, but a brief Google search for “Meemaw’s beer cheese” only pulled up a Bustle article.

Brittany tells everyone that she invited Raquel to girls’ night and you can see the group calculate whether they should throw their drinks in Brittany’s face or jump out the window.

It’s so rich that Brittany is inviting Raquel out to tell her that her boyfriend sucks. And yet, she’s still with Jax and is now pledging to be with him FOR LIFE, so?? The cognitive dissonance is astounding. Jax buys tampons one time and all of a sudden we’re meant to believe he’s a completely new person?

I can’t believe Kristen is telling Raquel that James has a really shitty temper. Spoken by the woman who punched James in the face??!? Kristen should get a gold medal in mental gymnastics. F*ck it, they all should.

Katie: I feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone where monsters are allowed to do and say whatever they want without consequences.

Yeah, welcome to 2018, bitch. Where have ya been?

We end this episode with Katie going to talk to Lisa to tell her about James calling her fat during Pride. I’m actually here for this Katie because Lisa is saying “James’ language is unacceptable” but not actually vowing to do anything. *Whispers into the void* just like when any high-powered man gets called out for unacceptable behavior. So Katie basically tells Lisa “it’s him or me.” You can tell Lisa is PISSED to not be calling the shots this time. Maybe if these men ever faced consequences for their gross behavior we wouldn’t have to resort to ultimatums! I mean, has anyone else ever thought about how the only person who has truly gotten fired from SUR and never gotten her job back has been Kristen? I have to wonder why that is…

And it’s possible I spoke too soon about this season being good, because this episode was kind of a bore. I tried to make this recap as exciting as I could, but putting jokes into this uninspired episode is like trying to inject life into a corpse… or into Giggy’s hairless body. Boom! And with that, I’m out of here! See you guys next Monday, because I’m pretty sure Bravo is f*cking with us yet again by changing the time of this show. For the record, I DO NOT SUPPORT THIS!

Images: Trae Patton / Bravo Media; Giphy (4)

Source: http://allofbeer.com/vanderpump-rules-season-7-episode-3-recap-%c2%b7-betches/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2019/02/23/vanderpump-rules-season-7-episode-3-recap-%c2%b7-betches/

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adambstingus · 5 years

Text

Vanderpump Rules Season 7 Episode 3 Recap · Betches

Lisa arrives at Pride dressed like she’s going to the Kentucky Derby.

No further comments at this time.

Me:

We leave this with Raquel saying she wants to stay with James for the Instagram exposure.

Raquel and James are trying to put together furniture while discussing the train wreck that was the day before.

Ok so James’s story is that he and Hope hooked up two and a half years ago, before he was with Raquel.

Me:

Right after this, Peter calls James to un-invite him to his birthday. I kind of wonder what Kristen had to blackmail him with in order to get that to happen.

James: Well Tom’s drinks don’t taste like alcohol so it snuck up on me. Raquel: Mmm, no that’s not it.

Ariana: Stassi just kept following me around and being nice to me so I gave up the energy to be bitchy.

Relatable.

Jax re: Raquel: Why would you want to be with someone who literally everybody hates?

LOLLLLLLLLLMFAOOOO IS THIS A JOKE?? Pot, meet kettle who everyone hates.

Jax has started his job back at SUR again. Again, what’s it like to have literally no consequences for your actions? MUST BE NICE.

Wait a sec, did Schwartz just call Katie his girlfriend? Yes he did. THAT’S YOUR WIFE! Or have you forgotten?

Schwartz goes to talk to James about calling Katie fat and the convo goes as follows:

Schwartz: Katie isn’t fat she’s sexy and luscious James: I know man Schwartz: Say it. I want you to say it.

View this post on Instagram

Don’t forget there’s a new #pumprules tonight at 9pm!

A post shared by Katie Maloney-Schwartz (@musickillskate) on Dec 16, 2018 at 1:51pm PST

Meanwhile at guys’ night, Jax comes riding in on a motor scooter. All I could think about was:

Brittany tells everyone that she invited Raquel to girls’ night and you can see the group calculate whether they should throw their drinks in Brittany’s face or jump out the window.

Katie: I feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone where monsters are allowed to do and say whatever they want without consequences.

Yeah, welcome to 2018, bitch. Where have ya been?

Images: Trae Patton / Bravo Media; Giphy (4)

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/vanderpump-rules-season-7-episode-3-recap-%c2%b7-betches/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/183010553612

0 notes

allofbeercom · 5 years

Text

Vanderpump Rules Season 7 Episode 3 Recap · Betches

Lisa arrives at Pride dressed like she’s going to the Kentucky Derby.

No further comments at this time.

Me:

We leave this with Raquel saying she wants to stay with James for the Instagram exposure.

Raquel and James are trying to put together furniture while discussing the train wreck that was the day before.

Ok so James’s story is that he and Hope hooked up two and a half years ago, before he was with Raquel.

Me:

Right after this, Peter calls James to un-invite him to his birthday. I kind of wonder what Kristen had to blackmail him with in order to get that to happen.

James: Well Tom’s drinks don’t taste like alcohol so it snuck up on me. Raquel: Mmm, no that’s not it.

Ariana: Stassi just kept following me around and being nice to me so I gave up the energy to be bitchy.

Relatable.

Jax re: Raquel: Why would you want to be with someone who literally everybody hates?

LOLLLLLLLLLMFAOOOO IS THIS A JOKE?? Pot, meet kettle who everyone hates.

Jax has started his job back at SUR again. Again, what’s it like to have literally no consequences for your actions? MUST BE NICE.

Wait a sec, did Schwartz just call Katie his girlfriend? Yes he did. THAT’S YOUR WIFE! Or have you forgotten?

Schwartz goes to talk to James about calling Katie fat and the convo goes as follows:

Schwartz: Katie isn’t fat she’s sexy and luscious James: I know man Schwartz: Say it. I want you to say it.

View this post on Instagram

Don’t forget there’s a new #pumprules tonight at 9pm!

A post shared by Katie Maloney-Schwartz (@musickillskate) on Dec 16, 2018 at 1:51pm PST

Meanwhile at guys’ night, Jax comes riding in on a motor scooter. All I could think about was:

Brittany tells everyone that she invited Raquel to girls’ night and you can see the group calculate whether they should throw their drinks in Brittany’s face or jump out the window.

Katie: I feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone where monsters are allowed to do and say whatever they want without consequences.

Yeah, welcome to 2018, bitch. Where have ya been?

Images: Trae Patton / Bravo Media; Giphy (4)

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/vanderpump-rules-season-7-episode-3-recap-%c2%b7-betches/

0 notes