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ramblian · 4 years

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Jericho Thoughts

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhh

okay so. i’m rewatching jericho. i first watched it sometime around 8th-9th grade, I think maybe somewhere in the first half of 2014. I basically remembered this: the main character was the black sheep of the family, he came back to town, and atomic bombs destroyed most of the US, and the show was about the town dealing with the aftermath. the guy from continuum and one ep of flashpoint played a character i liked named dale (eric knudsen) who liked a popular girl who ended up befriending him, and the asking-for-flowers flashpoint ep guy was the responsible brother. Someone used to be a teacher. The main character looked like Skeet Ulrich, but i didn’t know who that was, just the name.

turns out the main character WAS Skeet Ulrich, and 2 characters (heather and emily) used to be teachers, and i apparently forgot almost all of the major characters. I’ve been rewatching it with the knowledge of which characters die, so that’s good. the show is really good, and it’s really intense. I’m almost done, and it’s tough to keep watching both because it’s so intense and because i know a character i like is about to die tragically.

watching this show makes me so TENSE. i think it really got bad when goetz showed up and i knew bonnie’s death was coming up. i’ve been watching the same episode for like an hour and i started 6 minutes in from another viewing. i don’t know why i’m so stressed. well actually i do it’s because things in this show are AWFUL but i know that no one dies after bonnie.

i also really like that the plot is very much what drives the show. romantic relationships somewhat matter (eric/april/mary, dale/skylar, and stanley/mimi in particular get screentime, while jake’s relationships with emily and heather are there and meaningful but not something that drives the story or gets a lot of attention. dale and eric’s relationships have also been less important in season 2) but they are regularly sidelined while the character deal with the latest crisis. characters have backstories that aren’t always super expanded on, like johnston’s chaotic neutral dad or stanley and bonnie’s parents, because they don’t have a meaningful impact on the plot- how mimi grew up isn’t going to change how the Greens deal with food shortages.

also, i love that it’s a post-apocalyptic show where there’s a lot of fighting and lawlessness and not once have they used rape as a plot device. the closest it ever came to being mentioned was when maggie, a survivor pretending to be military to get towns’ supplies, said that ‘out there, men only want women for one thing’ and that’s IT. i respect that so much. way too many shows and books and movies are like ‘things are bad... and we can only express that through rape’ but this show never does

also the grey morality is very well done in season 1 (the bad guys are clearer in season 2). characters fight and do shitty things because everyone is just trying to survive. Constantino was wrong to start a war with Jericho, but i also understand where he was coming from. Ravenwood ransacked New Bern and left them with almost nothing, and Jericho never bothered to warn them. There were some people considering not honoring the deal to repay the windmills in food. New Bern was on the brink of destruction and Constantino tried to get the resources for survival where he could, by force. The thing with the refugees too. There isn’t really enough food for everyone, and it’s true that Jericho’s been getting a lot of refugees when it’s barely managing to sustain its own population. Some of the refugees have been stealing from them, and sometimes you have to make tricky decisions to survive. But the refugees are also probably going to die if they get sent away, and understandably they cannot accept that. they’ve been stealing food to prepare for this possibility, and they are willing to be violent to secure their place because jericho is much better off than just about anywhere else and they don’t want to die. Roger gets in a fight with Gray and accidentally shoots him, but then actively chooses to hold him at gunpoint and refuse him medical help unless he guarantees the safety of the other refugees. That’s obviously awful- but he’s also trying to protect the lives of the 50 innocent people he brought here. In the end, the refugees get to stay because some Jericho residents volunteer to share their rations, but Roger does not because he obviously committed a terrible crime. He’s not a bad person, but of course he can’t just be forgiven and integrated back into Jericho like nothing happened, and he accepts that and leaves with only a gun from Jake to protect himself because at least the others and emily will be safe.

also that emily and roger’s relationship wasn’t made meaningless in order to further her relationship with jake even despite their history as high school sweethearts.

oh god i just watched the scene where stanley’s talking to bonnie in the morgue and it’s so well done and i’m just in bed crying- not sobbing or anything, but plenty of tears. i don’t know what the last show to make me cry like this was; i’ve been watching so much youtube that i haven’t been watching a lot of hard hitting shows lately i guess. Barry was extremely Fucked Up, that might have made me cry, but it might not have- it had me fucked up for weeks, but i don’t know if i cried.

anyway the scene with stanley and bonnie in the morgue is so good. Stanley talking to her like she’s still alive the way they always did for their parents, and talking to her sign language bc that’s her language. Telling her to say hi to their parents. Letting her know that mimi is still alive, that she succeeded in protecting her, and thanking her for it. Still joking around a little even though he’s obviously heartbroken and just being so genuine with her. Neither of them deserved this.

wow can’t believe heather is a fuckin bootlicker, knowing that the government is extremely corrupt and that she and beck are destroying new bern and choosing to continue to work for that government.

oh beck just has to be some sort of a stupid son of a bitch. absolute goddamn buffoon. siding with the govt, arresting jake in the shadiest way possible in the middle of a crowd, choosing to torture jake (which if he knew a goddamn thing like hawkins did he would know was ineffective), and then thinking that after everything this town and those rangers have done to protect themselves and their loved ones that it was just going to work out for him like the others aren’t going to come for jake immediately and efficiently. i liked beck well enough before but any fondness or respect for him is fucking absolutely gone.

at least eric is really getting to show off his leadership skills now. johnston’s dead, jake’s been arrested/kidnapped, hawkins is busy with other shit. eric’s always one of the second-in-commands but this is one of the few times he’s just plain in command.

“your friends have escalated this to a level i will not tolerate” right but you dragging jake to a fuckin blacksite to torture him was fine???? YOU ESCALATED THIS YOU DUMB STUPID SON OF A BITCH. you have really been given so many chances this season to not serve an evil government and try to protect these people and you’ve failed almost every time, huh? he’d also have to be some sort of an idiot to think that a clearly faked note with jake’s signature saying ‘this bad’ would stop anyone. god i haven’t escalated to hating someone this much so quickly in a long fuckin time.

love how beck is leveraging the entire town of jericho and choosing to oppress them in order to get the rangers to turn themselves in <3 i love punishing innocent people to use them against others just like goetz did last episode <3 what a good guy

i dont know why there are so many beck fics on ao3 because this man fucking sucks. like, can you imagine refusing a whole town food, power, and lights as a bargaining chip, blaming someone else (”don’t forget, you caused this”) and then still thinking you have the moral high ground? incredible mental gymnastics when will beck be in the olympics

heather: your actions are so blatantly terrible that i am just now beginning to consider not defending you to everyone. take responsibility for what you do

beck: hmm. no. my choices are jake’s fault

i know beck is probably going to ‘redeem’ himself by the end of the episode but i don’t fuckin care. too late for him now he can’t just say ‘oops’ and pretend he hasn’t done all of this shit. wild how his actions are now literally being compared to those of nazis during wwii and people still like this guy.

hey do you think beck is an idiot asshole or just pretending to be one for fun

commanding officer: go ahead and destroy everything in the area

beck: 🤔 is killing all those people wrong?

oof rip eric sure is rough when you have to ally with the guy who tortured you and killed your dad to protect ur city but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. also where the hell has dale been? i’ll let it go bc the show isn’t consistent on when he shows up and is a major part of town but in universe it sure is fuckin weird, and you know beck would have dragged him in for questioning too

oh wow beck finally decided to actually try thinking critically and addressing the obvious evidence about cheyenne’s corruption. that makes up for everything and i can stan now /s

‘i’m no longer taking orders from the cheyenne government. i believe it’s corrupt at its core. its actions are criminal’ oh so like everyone’s been telling you this whole time? the actions like the ones you’ve taken, not even at anyone’s command? idiot.

lmao i’m not as opposed to constantino’s methods as the show thinks i’m supposed to be. a revolution against a corrupt, oppressive government is not peaceful. it cannot be. the only good fascist is a dead one.

#jericho #jericho spoilers #in case this shows up in the tags and someone sees it or smthn

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flcwerstudies · 6 years

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cute tag!

pretty long post coming up!! Thanks to @cafedetude for tagging me!! im tagging: @hermiionegrcnger @studying-frenzy @belledoe @tiny-notes @theteadesk !! You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to ofc and if u want to do it and i haven’t tagged you go ahead!!

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? there must always be more milk than cereal, but that amount must not exceed a certain amount do you get me? when i scoop my cereal there has to be proportionate amounts of milk in each scoop, consistently, until i have finished my bowl. my mind is a strange and lonely place.

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? yes! its so refreshing and i feel like all your lethargy just evaporates... i love taking walks in the winter around my neighborhood in the evenings.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? spoons, lipsticks, i once used another book to bookmark a book, hair elastic, my contact lenses case, compact mirror....im a mess, i know

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? tea: scalding hot with lots of sugar and some milk. coffee: lots of milk, so much sugar

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? no? i just want my braces off!!

6: do you keep plants? yess

7: do you name your plants? yes! i am currently growing two wild roses and I’ve named them Calliope and Polymnia.

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? journaling, writing, reenacting musicals and dramatic renditions of songs?

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? yeah ofccc it keeps me sane

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? back and side

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? CAROL THE LESBIAN LIBRARIAN // mary walks by // too many to list here tbh

12: what’s your favorite planet? mars! and also venus

13: what’s something that made you smile today? my friends

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? a hurricane flew thru the entire place, empty wine bottles on the ground, beanbag chairs, stacks of books and movies, maybe a cat and a dog lazing around on the couch

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! there’s a gigantic cloud of alcohol wayyyyy out in outer space that could produce over 450 trillion pints of beer

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? give me all the pasta. i love all pastas.

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? im ok with my hair color now

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. GETTING A CAPUCHIN MONKEY AS MY PATRONUS ON POTTERMORE

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? yes! i rant a lot and i sort of write down reflections? on my day and things. its really emo and angsty lmao im 16 pls

20: what’s your favorite eye color? brown eyes. so gentle. so sharp. so kind but so cruel. so ambiguous!

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. my tote bag from myanmar! the straps are falling off but i love it so much

22: are you a morning person? depends on if i slept early enough

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? sleep, watch a movie, watch youtube, read

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? absolutely not. it always pisses me off when people are like ohhh you can tell me anything??? no i can’t????

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? my friend’s house lmao

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? my peach converse! they’re so pastel and they seem weird but converse generally go well with a lot of things

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? i don’t like gum tbh

28: sunrise or sunset? both

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? sticks his tongue out when he’s concentrating and its so cute i die everytime

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes but i will never ever go into detail with anyone about this lmao

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. i love socks, i like wearing weird socks except for toe socks, people who sleep with socks on are Immune to Heat and Not Afraid Of Dying?? no white socks get nasty real quick and they’re so bland, i love socks i have this grey pair with french bulldog faces allllll over it and i wear them all the time and even though people can’t see them i still get happy and tell people about my dog socks.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. HA LMAO we had just watched a scary movie so obviously we turned on my little pony and watched that for two hours

33: what’s your fave pastry? cupcakes! anything tbh i have an enormous sweet tooth

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? my dad used to go on a lot of business trips and he came back once with a huge stuffed bear from switzerland and its so fuzzy its still on my bed. it’s name is Fred and it wears overalls and it has brown fur!

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? yes to all!!

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? paul anka lmao he’s not a band but ya know

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? clean

38: tell us about your pet peeves! wHEN UR JAMMING OUT TO MUSIC AND THEN SPOTIFY JUST STOPS WORKING?? people asking me if im mad when im just being quiet and then making me mad by continually questionning me, people who will ask dumb questions (yes, there are always dumb questions. google is free and im not going to tell u the homework, it’s written on the board quite clearly u moron), racist/homophobic/ableist/ generally offensive and disrespectful people

39: what color do you wear the most? grey and navy��

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I have mismatching earrings that my grandmother got me for my birthday!

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? Fifteen Dogs by Andre Alexis!

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! the starbucks on center street it’s very Starbucks, exactly what you would expect, but I always sit in the corner spot near the windows

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? My family!

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? sitting in the sand in shell key, florida. my feet are in the water and i am watching my family swimming. I am very sunburnt but my mind is completely blank in a good way

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? absolutely

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. ofc they used a baby lion as their mascot. it’s simba-lic.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? there’s this food in korea that’s just stir fried rice with soybean sprouts and the sprouts..... aw god....they refuse to be bitten in half and it’s so gross i hate it sm

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? darkness! and no it is different today!

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? there are scarce places to buy CD’s now but the last one I bought was Micheal Jackson’s Bad

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? bottle caps and paperclips and also pens i pick off the ground

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? my dad. any aretha franklin song

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? the spongebob one and the gif of the white man who blinks a lot....u know the one

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? i loved all of them and i want to be able to quote them in all of my speech but i dont think people have watched all of them

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? i was working on homework last night and when i was turning on my laptop to work on my project i met my reflection in the screen

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? been incredibly bitchy like damn.....i surprise myself and i really hate it

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? when people use weird shit as bookmarks, when they laugh with their eyes shut, laugh lines near their eyes, dimples, kindness, when they aren’t afraid of making eye contact with me bc i have weirdly intense eyes

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? it did not fit the mood of my day but yes i did reenact the lyrics

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? my friend diana is the wine mom but i am the vodka aunt. why?? she is infinitely more caring and kind and sophisticated and also wine gets u lowkey, calm drunk, while i, the vodka aunt, am caring, but i have a bit of a laissez faire attitude and go with the flow and ‘damn what the hell fuck it’ kinda vibe and vodka gets u sloppy shitfaced drunk with none of the sophistication that comes with wine.

59: what’s your favorite myth? icarus

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? i dont LOVE poetry but i like haikus they’re like clever one liners ha

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I gave my friend a notebook that i’d hastily made the night before and I have received a box of pads which in retrospect is not even a stupid present bc pads are expensive

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? i drink oj when i can

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? i organize them every month bc i am ridiculous and i can’t function if my bookshelf is weirdly organized

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? pale grey almost white.

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? my oldest group of friends (TNT lmaoooo) OR YOU KNOW callixtus from volunteering holyyy. you know those people who u meet and u immediately click with?? he’s on of them magical people and he was hella funny too i miss that guy to all hell

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? small roses! peach blossoms and cherry blossoms too. one huge ass hibiscus or lotus flower as a statement piece

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? cozy and sheltered. valid excuse for not going out

68: what’s winter like where you live? terrible but i love it kinda

69: what are your favorite board games? monopoly

70: have you ever used a ouija board? NO WHAT

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? barley, green or reallllyyyy black tea with loootss of sugar so that it makes your teeth ache

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yeah how’d you know

73: what are some of your worst habits? expecting everyone to be on the same page

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. dedicated and brash, loud and hilarious, soft, amazing, i love them a lot

75: tell us about your pets! i dont have pets!! T-T

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? studying BUT DONT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS OK

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? hateclub sorry

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? done my makeup for me while gossiping with me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? pale green and yeah i did. i chose it bc i love green! and the old color was boring and i didn’t like it

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. no edges at all, soft bovine eyes , shaking leaves, crocodile tears

82: are/were you good in school? yes! it’s a source of a lot of pride for me!

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? amsterdam by nothing but thieves omg

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? oohh nahh im not planning on getting tattoos im scared of needles

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? through the woods? i used to read a lot of them but you know i grew out of them

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? not especially no

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? the drop, double indemnity, back to the future, idk there’s a lot

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? the rennaissance! it was so extra and i loved it a lot

89: are you close to your parents? yeah

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. TORONTO-soaring skyline from the highways at night near the lakeshore, the lights from the condos are like stars and its ridiculous but i also loooooveee dubrovnik in croatia and hanoi in vietnam and kaunas in lithuania and kyoto in japan.....in dubrovnik the wind blows in from the shore and at night when the lights are on in the walled city the stone glows amber. In Hanoi in the old quarter, motorbikes flash by and there’s yelling and the smell of pork skewers and there’s old buildings and new ones, huge stalks of bamboo leaning up against the walls. In Kaunas the wind is so cold and sharp and the buildings are so clean and there’s that old fortress and the tower! it’s so beautiful. and Kyoto is old and archaic but so modern it hurts and the streets are too uniform and the houses creep me out a bit bc they’re so quiet.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? i dont think so

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? i will bury my pasta in cheese just you watch

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? my hair is one style fits all bc its short

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my friend!

95: what are your plans for this weekend? study and work on projects and homework and stress and nap and have dinner with a guest

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? no updates. we die like men.

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? isfj-t, aries, ravenclaw

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? sometime in september? it was nice!

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. put your head on my shoulder by paul anka....there’s a lot and im really lazy sorry

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years in the future, just to see where I end up

#tagged #ask games #nice!#tagged games #tag games #about me

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too-queer-for-you · 7 years

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Title: What We’ve Been Hiding-Secret Project and More! Rating: G Word Count: 1277 Summary: A description of a video in which Dan and Phil finally answer long asked questions and reveal the truth. Read on AO3

dont @ me about this being unrealistic that’s why I made it a fic and not a theory

“I still can’t believe we’re actually doing this.” Dan said, as he sat down next to Phil, smiling. Phil shrugged back at him.

“It’s time. But yeah, I understand how you feel.” Phil turned back to the camera after nodding at Dan. “Hey guys! So, there’s something we need to tell you. We’ve been working on it for a long time-”

“I’m sorry, I think I’m the one who’s done most of the work, actually.” Dan interrupted, glaring at Phil playfully.

“Well, maybe. But it wouldn’t exist without me, so it’s both of us.” Phil said, trying not to get distracted. “Many of you have guessed that we have a secret project in the works, which we do, but we’re going to talk about that later. First, we have something to tell you.” Phil said, his heart fluttering with nerves and excitement.

“I should add, that we’re only doing this because we’re tired of the rumors, and the theories, and the questions-”

“You’re only mad because I was the one with the secret wife, not you.” Phil said smugly. Dan rolled his eyes, and turned back to the camera, before lifting his left hand, a thin ring with black stones clearly visible. Phil was beaming.

“Yes, for God’s sakes, we’re together, stop asking about it.” Dan said, an air of obviously feigned annoyance and disinterest in his voice.

“Dan, don’t be mean, open up to them!” Phil said, pushing Dan over. He simply looked at Phil.

“Excuse me, I am Daniel Howell, face of nihilism and disinterest. I don’t open up.” Phil smirked.

“I’ve got experience that would say otherwise,” He said, tongue sticking out of his teeth as he grinned. Dan opened his mouth in shock.

“Are you-” He stood up. “Are you bloody kidding me? In our coming out video, you’re the one who makes the sex joke? Who have you become, Phil Lester?” He said, dramatically storming out.

“Dan, come back.” Phil called, knowing he would, looking at the camera knowingly as Dan sat back down. He cleared his throat. “Anyway. We’re finally telling you this upfront because we’re engaged, and we didn’t want to keep having to take on and off our rings, only wear them at home, all that stuff. It’s tiring.”

“Phil, show yours!” Dan prodded, smiling, his fake dramatics faded. Phil raised his left hand to show a ring in a matching style to Dan’s, with turquoise stones.

“I’m sure a lot of you guys are wondering why we’ve kept it secret for this long. And that’s a hard question to answer. I don’t really know how to, honestly.” Phil said, thinking.

“Look, I know a lot of people watching this have been closeted, or maybe you are right now, and you understand. To have this thing, which is actually so fundamental to who you are as a person, but know that there are people out there who aren’t okay with it, it’s scary. And we just weren’t ready. We have been loosening up in the past year or so, being less scared to touch each other, because we didn’t want this to come out of nowhere. And we-we get so many comments and messages from you guys, saying you’re gay, or bi, pan, or ace, or trans, or nonbinary, or a million other things, and that you don’t have anyone you feel like you can tell, that you feel alone, and that we’ve helped you feel less alone. And we realized we could be doing more. And we were ready to do more. We felt sturdy enough in our relationship, in our careers, that we felt it was safe to take the risk. So that’s what we’re doing. And I hope, to any of you out there who might be struggling, that we can help you more. I have been where you are, a teenager struggling with feelings you don’t think you should be having, watching a video of some guy you barely know for hope. I got lucky.” Dan’s inspirational tone changed, to one more urgent. “I got lucky that the guy I was watching messaged me back. I got lucky that he wasn’t someone who wanted to take advantage of me. You hear these stories today of creators taking advantage of their fans when they’re young, and I’m honestly disgusted by it. What I did, going to meet this guy who was five years older than me that I met on the internet? That was stupid. I lied to my parents about where I was going, and it was stupid, because you don’t know what might happen. Please, be careful.” As Dan was speaking, Phil had turned towards him and place a comforting hand on his back, nodding, then turned back to the camera, clearing his throat.

“So. There’s that sorted. Onto the secret project! The one other than the wedding, I mean.” Phil said, smiling.

“That’s the one that I’ve done significantly more work on, by the way.” Dan added, a lighter tone to his voice now.

“Hush. A lot of you have noticed that we recently followed Faraz Osman on twitter, a documentary director. Yes, there is going to be a documentary. But it’s not going to be following us around for a tour or anything. See, doing what we do, there’s been a lot of footage and photos over the years that you guys have never seen, because they revealed too much. As far back as 2009. We saved them, because they’re nice for us to look at, but we’re ready to share it with you now. So we’ve sent all of it to Faraz and his team, along with videos that are actually posted from before we thought about privacy. And they’re putting together a kind of story of Dan and Phil. We’ll tell you stories we’ve never told before, answer questions we’ve never answered. Show what life was really like inside the glass closet.” Dan laughed.

“Yeah, heart-eyes Howell exists because I’m an awful actor. If we tried to cut it all out, there wouldn’t be any videos. We were never fully hidden.” He said, grinning, before his grin faded. “And I’m specifically going to talk about what happened in 2012. I’ll give more details in the documentary, but I was struggling, and I took it out on a lot of you guys, and that was wrong. And I’m truly sorry. We’re doing this for those of you who have believed in us for years, supported us for years, some from the very beginning. Also to those of you who are newer, because support is support, and we are grateful.” Phil was smiling at him softly, then turned towards the camera.

“Because I know you’re all wondering when you’re going to see this, it’s going to be released at the beginning of next year. It’s not going to be on YouTube Red, it’s not going to be in theatres. We are doing this to thank you for everything. It will be absolutely free, and will go on my channel.” Dan started speaking immediately after.

“And because I’m the one who did all of the work for it, there will be a wedding video, full of vlogs of preparations, suit fittings, tastings, and the actual ceremony. And that will be on my channel. It’ll be posted the day after the documentary.”

They looked at each other, love apparent in their eyes, before turning back to the camera, nodding an acknowledgment, and covering the lens with their left hands, rings sparkling as they approach. The screen goes black. A photo of their left hands together, rings matching, appears with a simple caption.

“Thank You.”

#phanfiction #phanfic #phan au #coming out #engagement #hey people who follow me and aren't into phan just ignore this and let me be trash #my shit

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sparklemybuttercream-blog · 7 years

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She’s Your Daughter - Jack Maynard Imagine

A/N- can you do one were jack’s girlfriend gets pregnant at nineteen and shes scared of telling him as he just started his youtube channel - so she leaves him without telling him - 3 years later she goes shopping with her daughter who’s just turned three (Evie) she starts playing with her toy but doesn’t notice her mum has moved and she starts panicking, she bumps into conor and the rest of the boys, conor and jack calm her down and help her find you but there both shocked in the outcome

Positive. It says positive. I can’t deal with this? This has to be wrong but it cant be. All 3 tests say positive. I’m nineteen and pregnant. How am I meant to cope? I don’t know what im doing with my life. How am I meant to tell Jack? He isn’t ready to be a father, he has just started his career he has no time for this. Do i tell him? But what happens if he leaves me? What happens if he wants nothing to do with me? I dont understand how this happened.. well i do but we used protection i’m on the pill. I cant even think straight.

*** 3 years on ***

“Mommy Mommy”

“Shh darling im trying to drive”

3 years had passed and I couldn’t imagine life any better. I decided to keep the baby as we created a life and now I have a beautiful baby girl who’s just turned three. Evie was my world and the best decision i made. My relationship with Jack didn’t last though. That’s the main thing that changed. I had to break up with him he wanted to move to London but I couldn’t do that at the time. I saw the dedication he had towards Youtube and i didn’t want to interfere. We left it on mutual terms yet we haven’t spoken since.

When Evie turned one i decided our life in Brighton had come to an end, I packed our bags and moved to London. My parents told me I should find Jack and let him know but seeing how well his career was going put me off. He didn’t need this. There were days when i wanted to contact him only because Evie looked so much like him and there were days when she would ask where’s daddy. Obviously it would break my heart but it was for the best.

We were currently on the way to do some shopping in Westfield to have a little girly day and to also stock up on some items for the apartment. I liked our little outings they were special i wanted to make Evie’s childhood as memorable as possible. Pulling into the car park, i turned to my little girl to see her sat there playing with her toys.

“Darling do you want to walk or go in the pushchair?”

“Walk! Mommy I want to walk!” I laughed smiling how she was already becoming independent.

“You have to stay by my side at all times then no wondering off” I opened her car door undone her seat beat and helped her down onto the ground.

“Im a big girl now!”

“You are love” I smiled at how cute she was being. I took her hand in mine and made our way to the shopping centre. After going around a few shops I finally gave in to Evie as she wanted to go to the toy section in the final store we were in. And that’s when i had the worst panic ever. One minute she was by my side, the next she wasn’t.

***JACKS POV***

A successful day shopping with the boys had come to the end. Even though i wasn’t planning on buying anything i probably brought too much. Heading out of Westfield, Conor noticed a little girl crying on the floor looking hopelessly around.

“Aw guys we cant just walk past and pretend we never saw her” Conor mentioned looking at the child.

“It would be a crawl thing to do” We headed in the direction to the crying girl. Me and Conor knelt to the ground making sure she was ok. She looked up at us with tears still forming in her eyes.

“I lost my mommy”

“It’s ok, we’ll help you find her” Conor smiled trying to calm her down. “What toys have you got here” While Conor tried to distract the little girl, I turned my head to the rest of the boys who were chatting between themselves exchanging looks.

“Jack?” Caspar asked.

“What mate?”

“That girl looks so much like you” Oli continued with them all looking at the child then back to me.

“Don’t be stupid” I mean how could it be my child. I’m not in a relationship, I make sure to cover up when with someone.

“Bro they have a point” Conor spoke up not taking his attention off her.

“You could have a child with someone you don’t know” Joe joked but I wasn’t laughing.

“That’s just ridiculous, I would know if i had a child or not” I faked laughed knowing for sure this kid was not mine.

“It’s just weird how she has the same but smaller features as you” Josh added taking in the detail of the pairing. For a moment Jack didn’t believe it. But then a recognisable sound reached his eyes sending him into a state of shock.

“Evie!” A women shouted running over to our direction.

“Mommy!” Evie lifted herself up running straight to the women who instantly picked her up.

“What did i say about staying by my side?”

“Sorry mommy”

“Y/N?” Conor said in confusion. I was probably being rude for staring but none of this was processing in my mind.

“Y/N as in Jack’s ex?” Caspar asked wanting to clear up the confusion which lead with the rest of them. Y/N just nodded clearly in the same shock as i am. The boys jokey comments about ‘Evie’ being mine started to sound more realistic at this time but i didnt want to believe it.

“You have a child?” Conor asked not knowing what else to say.

“Erm yeah, Evie she’s 3″ Evie turned around to face the boys again smiling waving her toy around. She was 3. Me and Y/N broke up 3 years ago. Surely she wasn’t mine. It cant be. If it isn’t mine then Y/N cheated but i full on know well she isn’t the type. This cannot be the reason why she broke up with me can it? All this time i thought it was because she wasn’t ready to move London. But she had nothing holding her back? Then it clicked. The only thing to be holding her back would be this.

“Shes adorable” Mikey said trying to overcome the awkwardness.

“Thanks, she’s my little princess”

“She looks so much like Jack” Josh said without realising what he said earning a punch in the arm from Joe. Silence filled all of us almost confirming the truth. But am i ready to hear the truth?

“About that” Her tone of voice softened, almost scared like. I glanced to look at Y/N and her eyes found mine right away. I’ve known this girl since the beginning of high school and when i saw her look. I knew.

“She’s my daughter?”

Part 2 :)

#jack maynard #jack maynard imagine #conor maynard #joe sugg #thatcherjoe #josh pieters #Oli White #Mikey Pearce #Caspar Lee #buttercream squad #youtuber imagine jack

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