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bvnnyholly · 6 months

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the evans and their favorite arctic monkeys album (gn!reader x the evans)

note: this only consists of tate, kit, kyle, jimmy, jpm, rory and kai— their seasons are the only ones i've watched LMAO. they're also the only ones i think would listen to the monkeys.

CAUTION: opinions, slight mentions of intercourse, mentions of being impregnated, cursing, and ahs spoilers.

tate langdon - favorite worst nightmare

-he's definitely a big fwn guy, alex turner wrote 'do me a favor' just for him I JUST KNOW IT. the album title fits him too.

-he found out about arctic monkeys through you when he was looking at your spotify playlist. he found the band name a little bit silly so he played it but to his surprise, he actually liked it.

-his favorite songs have to be brianstorm and d is for dangerous.

-he probably also like 'humbug' and 'whatever people say i am, that's what i'm not'.

kit walker - the car

-not so sure about this but considering that he works at a gas station, 'the car' kinda fits him and it also sounds kinda old and funky so i think kit would like that

-he probably listens to arctic monkeys when you play it in your record player. he wasn't really a big fan of it at first but he grew into it and the band reminds him alot about you so he really likes it now.

-his favorite song is probably 'i ain't quite where i think i am' and 'body paint'

-he also likes tranquility base hotel and casino and plays it after a long day at work

kyle spencer - whatever people say i am, that's what i'm not + humbug

pre-death

-he definitely likes wpsia and relates to it.

-he discovered it at a frat party and liked it. he probably listens to them after class. you both became friends because you also liked the monkeys.

- his favorite song has to be 'riot van', 'certain romance', and 'mardy bum'

-he also likes am because who doesn't

franken kyle

-humbug is his favorite because of how slow it is and how it's not as fast paced like the other albums.

-he listens to arctic monkeys when you play it and cuddle with him. you play it so much while you guys cuddle to the point where he associates the band with cuddling.

-his favorite songs are 'secret door' and 'cornerstone'

-he also likes tbhc because it's calm, he gets jumpscared when 'she looks like fun' plays though. he also likes 'i wanna be yours', the calm stuff basically.

jimmy darling - am

-jimmy definitely likes 'am'. his hair is also just as musty and covered in hair gel like alex in his late 'sias' and 'am' era.

-he heard 'am' through the local radio and really liked it. he sings 'r u mine?' for you in one of his performances on the freak show, and you absolutely love it.

-one of his favorites are 'do i wanna know?', 'fireside', and 'snap out of it', but absolutely despises 'why'd you only call me when you're high?' because he says "the lyrics are too real".

-jimmy stays loyal to his beloved 'am', probably because he doesn't know other albums exist, you're trying to get him into 'sias' though.

james patrick march - tranquility base hotel and casino

-james adores 'tbhc', he thinks the storytelling and the story itself is genius. but even how much he likes it, he wouldn't be caught alive listening to it (probably because he's dead).

-he first listened to the monkeys when you asked him to play something that isn't jazz. you forced him to spin one of your records, so he picked 'tbhc' because he found the title intriguing. he loves it but would never admit to you.

-'star treatment', 'one point perspective', and the title track are always on repeat for him. he thinks 'golden trunks' are the two of yous' song.

-james probably doesn't explore the arctic monkeys much, he listened to 'the car' but it was too modern for his taste.

rory monahan - suck it and see

-assuming that rory lives in california, he would definitely listen to "sias'. he also fits the album's aesthetic very well.

-you both discovered arctic monkeys at a record store. he picked 'suck it and see' as a joke and because he's a borny little shit. to his surprise, he ended up liking it though.

-'black treacle', 'piledriver waltz', and the title track are his favorites. you'd both debate on which one is better: the 'sias' version of 'piledriver waltz' or alex turner's version, he always defends the 'sias' version for some reason.

-he probably listens to the other albums but not as much as he does to 'sias'.

kai anderson - am

-he doesn't listen to 'am' that much, he doesn't listen to music that much in general. he thinks it's something sacred and should only be listened to when doing something holy, like creating a messiah with your sister through your gay boy toy twink cult member.

-he discovered 'am' through the internet, and plays it typically when he works out or attempting to "create a messiah" with you.

-he only listens to 'do i wanna know' because it's average republican behavior—he also only listens to mainstream music so like it's the only song he knows.

-as i said, mainstream music type of guy, so definitely only am.

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arcticmonkeysaf · 6 years

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Translation of Alex Turner’s interview in ICON magazine

Alex Turner, leader of Arctic Monkeys, the biggest rock band of the 21st century, and perhaps its last hope

"What the hell is this?"

We've just arrived at the location of our interview with Alex Turner, leader of Arctic Monkeys, who is absolutely awestruck. It's the first floor of the Bethnal Green Town Hall Hotel in London, an ancient Edwardian building with touches of art deco, converted, of course, into a hotel. In a room of the first floor, a photoshoot has just taken place.

"Well, I don't know, I think the people are getting married," says the press agent, attempting to explain some of the excitement it's provoked in Alex being in the space, without getting too carried away: we still have a job to do. Alex begins to run through the hall, the site of council meetings of the Bethnal Green since 1910, when the building was constructed. Nearly all civic government buildings in Spain are smaller, and certainly not as lovely as this place.

The writer of Fake Tales of San Francisco has already seated himself in the chair we suspect belongs to the mayor.

"What do you want? A fine or a wedding?" he jokes.

The press agent leaves, but the leader of the band formed in the era when teenagers no longer wanted to form rock bands can't keep still. He runs between the benches until he's standing in the spot meant for the speaker.

"A hundred pounds! Look here's £100!" He procures two rosy £50 notes. I suggest to him that we should keep them. He laughs. I decide not to insist. I say instead we should start the interview, after all we are here to talk about Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino, the sixth album by the band, not to get married or chat. He stops laughing. It's a shame that Alex Turner becomes such a timid person, careful and cautious, when the tape recorder starts. Before he assumes the role of frontman of the group that launched AM four years ago and made it the best selling vinyl record of the 21st century, he permits himself one last question.

"Would you get married here?" We look around - myself still thinking about those £100 - while we get cozy in two benches in the last row. I answer no, that's it's all very interesting, but not at all romantic.

"I agree. Motion denied," he decides.

Rising to fame in the middle of the last decade, Arctic Monkeys have become a phenomenon thanks to a handful of songs a friend converted into mp3 - they say that they, despite being part of the digital age, had problems even turning on a computer - which soon began to spread on the Internet. It was the raucous, intelligent, and British response to The Strokes. Seeing them on the stage in those early days, before the premiere of their debut album, Whatever People Say I Am That's What I'm Not, which would see the light of day in 2006 and would become the fastest selling debut album ever in Britain within in its first week of release, was a tremendously peculiar experience. Four kids at 3 a.m. making a spectacular noise in the Sala Razzmatazz in Barcelona, but who could barely reach the bar counter to order a drink.

More than a decade has passed and they've recorded four albums more. A brilliant sequel (Favourite Worst Nightmare), another risky, rapturous and rocking (Humbug, recorded en the California desert with Josh Homme), a delicate and underrated return to pop (Suck It and See) and a million-dollar beast, a sex-soundtrack record called AM. And then, they stopped.

"When we stopped touring in 2014, nearly everyone in the band was about to get married, or having kids, or another kid. The end of those concerts was much like the end of another chapter. We were all 28 or 29 and it felt like everything was about to change. During this neverending tour I thought that record would be with me forever. It was the longest tour we had ever done. Now I think we extended it because we knew that when it ended it would be the end of something bigger than just a series of concerts. I expected everything to change, well, I felt that even though the numbers said the opposite, in the end we had less than we started with," remembers Turner, about the final days we would see the band together in public.

Now all living in the U.S., each of the band members went on his own path. Alex returned to The Last Shadow Puppets, a band loved by Arctic Monkeys devotees. There Turner splits responsibilities with his friend Miles Kane, a guy with impeccable taste but with terrible ideas. In 2016 the pair played the mainstage at Primavera Sound, where they were the headliners. That performance was grotesque. The image of Turner, who looked like a mix between an actor in Rebeldes and a finalist in an Elvis impersonators competition, had only a semblance of Arctic Monkeys of AM. In that context he made a bit of a joke of himself. Compared to the boy who, as an adolescent, was rejected by a second-hand clothing shop in Sheffield because he was too shy, it had gotten out of hand.

"That was..." His words are halting, he speaks very slowly, he leaves sentences unfinished and even stops a joke short if he finds the punchline isn't as funny as he'd thought. "I think what I wanted to say with that image and that attitude have been said. It's over."

Now Turner sports long hair and a beard which has been the object of controversy among his fans, who even launched a Change.org campaign for him to shave it.

"There's a lot of scrutiny around our next step, I know. We've always tried to be discreet with what we do, where and with whom. It's normal, but I don't think we do it on purpose. In this age, it's hard to keep secrets. With this record we tried and even just getting to the studio, the sound engineer goes and posts a picture of us. Everyone is so crazy these days, they act like they're Columbo. 'I saw this, I spotted that guy...'" explains Turner when asked how it's possible that a band as big as his, who will be the headliners at Primavera Sound and at MadCool, has managed to make sure that, even with only a month left until the record's launch, no one knows absolutely anything about it.

"I don't know if not getting involved in social media is something we do on purpose to protect the band, but it helps," says Turner, introducing the topic of being offline. "Maybe it's not in our DNA to expose ourselves. I've put so much into the music that I don't know what more I can do with that. I can't open a Twitter account because I think everything's there, in the songs. I'd make a fool of myself if I started tweeting. See, social media doesn't bother me, truthfully, but when you become the version of yourself you've created in the virtual world there's something there that allows people to do their worst against you. And you can also do your worst against them. The consequences of that I can't even imagine, but I don't want them."

We've had to listen to Tranquility Base in a version that downloads and is scheduled for automatic deletion the next week. The band have asked us not to ask anything personal, days after an encounter Alex had with a journalist from The Times. There is no single before the release, but there is a new logo for the band's image. The only photograph of Turner is the one taken by a guard in an airport days before this meeting and which has reactivated the fierce debate with respect to the Sheffielder's beard. It's a record release like the ones before, but Turner hardly seems like a global superstar. I tell him that one time I interviewed Beyoncé and they sat me at one end of a massive table and told me that I shouldn't even think about touching her, and that, on another occasion interviewing Chris Cornell, I had to go into a hotel room that was completely dark and had to confirm that the voice answering my questions was actually the grunge singer's.

"Would you like some water?" Turner interrupts, and, before I can respond, fills my glass.

During the hours after our meeting, the first new photo of the band is made public (they look as though they're dressed for a wedding in December of 1972 in Iceland) and they publish the details and tracklisting of their latest record, which was recorded in Paris, London, and Los Angeles, where the band members now reside. But what most strikes me is the first line. "I just wanted to be one of The Strokes, now look at the mess you've made me make," sings Turner on “Star Treatment”, a gem of a song that marks the tone of an album destined to confound all those who expected something bombastic, expansive, and hormonal. The LP has songs with titles as fabulous as The Ultracheese, Batphone, or The World's First Ever Monster Truck Front Flip. Imagine Richard Hawley going on tour with comedian Andy Kaufman and performing only in Sheraton hotels located in state capitals, or Scott Walker in the pub, singing after a Sheffield United match. It's deliciously decadent and promises to polarize the opinions of millions of their fans. Is [Turner] nervous? And, more importantly, is he confident?

"Let's see, I think I remember feeling a bit like that with this last record. I wasn't sure if it was the right album. Are we going down the wrong path? It always happens. When I showed the first songs to my manager, to the people from the record label and my colleagues, a lot of the reactions were 'It's very unique.' I thought it was unique, but not that much. I doubted whether it was the right record for the Monkeys. So, Jamie came to my house and stayed with me for two weeks while we recorded. His enthusiasm for the songs confirmed to me that it was the right choice. If this is what comes out of me, that's what it is. I think we can do what we want to do, it's our band. So there's no reason to worry about whether it's a hit or not," he says about a record that, from time to time, evokes loneliness.

"Yes, a little bit," concedes Turner. "There's always been something in me that has made me isolated in life. But until now, I don't know why, I've avoided touching upon that on a creative level. The words passed through a very long process of refinement. It's been complicated getting here. For example, that first line about The Strokes. I fought hard against it, I wanted it but I didn't want it. I thought, "Hell, I'll leave it, because I know I'll change it because it's impossible that I'll end up saying this nonsense." And it got to a point that I thought, "If I feel like this, why not say it? I should be honest."

#alex turner #arctic monkeys #tbhc #tbh&c #tbhc spoilers #i know it's been traslated but have another #lmao #i nearly threw my computer against a wall while typing this up so #mine

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