#sometimes u just gotta let go of all the pressure u put on urself and go all loosey goosey with it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jungshookz · 3 years

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this is a little heavy so feel free to skip by !! i promise i won’t hold it against u<3

i just need some big cee-ster advice bc i’m having some relationship troubles://

it’s a long long story but to sum it up- rekindled a relationship at a time where we were both kinda down on life, we could talk to each other abt our struggles and relate, fast forward a couples months and it feels like i’m the only one who’s moved on to a better place. I still offered my full support when he needed it, but right now i’m his only form of any support system and it’s starting to take a toll on me. He has friends but apparently they’re only good for getting out the house to get drunk or high. it feels like his problems are becoming my own and i need to fix it for the both of us in order to keep the relationship stable. there’s some finer details that kinda add to the mess but right now i’m just at a lost of what to do with myself in this situation, i’ve never really dealt with something like this before.

hello hello!!! i know u sent this in a couple of days ago and i have been trying to come up with a somewhat decent response because i do want to help but i also don’t want to make a mess of things so!! here are some words from my brain that you certainly don’t have to listen to but i hope will still help you in some way :-)

i had a friend who was in a very similar situation! obviously there are some differences but lemme explain it real quick!! basically she had dated her partner for about three years and after the first year of university we were talking and she said that she felt as though she had grown and matured and he was still acting like the person she had met in high school and that she wanted to end things but he was going through some personal things and she was his only form of support at the moment but the relationship was starting to stress her out and she felt like she was responsible for him and she wasn’t dating him?? ultimately she broke things off and he took it preTTy hard and i remember she showed me all the screenshots of their conversation and he was like i don’t know what to do without you / i can’t do anything without you / you’re the only one that’s been there for me / please rethink this and when i reached out to him (he was a mutual friend too so it was a little sticky because it felt like i had to choose sides and i.,.,,., panic very easily under pressure :DD) he explained to me that i had to do whatever it took to get them back together and i’m realizing now i’m going off base a little so let me rounD back to my main point:

a relationship is a two-way street! it should be a mutual give and take situation and the two of you should be supporting each other and you should be happy to be there for each other and provide a sense of comfort whenever needed! you shouldn’t be this support-flavoured juice box that he can just grab and suck the life out of whenever he needs it!! (YUCK bad metaphor also kind of a gross metaphor but u get it) as you mentioned, the relationship is starting to take a toll on you and you feel like his problems are becoming your own and that just!! doesn’t sound like a relationship to me?? i understand the worry about him not having anything if you leave him but honestly,.,. not in a mean way or anything.,, that’s not?? really your problem?? ick i know that seems pretty harsh and selfish but sometimes u have to be harsh and selfish because you can’t spend 24/7 picking up the pieces of someone else’s mess and constantly worrying about the next mess they’re going to make! everyone has their own issues but the only person who can really patch everything up is yourself!! you can’t just dump all of your problems onto someone and expect them to fix it for you even though they’ve done it for you in the past... to feel as though you have to actively do things to keep the relationship afloat sounds very draining and sometimes ya just gotta put urself first

obviously take my advice with a grain of salt because i am certainly not a relationship expert and most of the words that come out of my brain are stupid most of the time but i really hope that you figure it out!!!!!!!!

sending u love and a six pack of support-flavoured juice boxes :-)

#answered #ask cee

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littlebabycrybtch · 3 years

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bro..... im sooo tired of ppl being whiny freaks about ppl liking fictional shit ‘~too much~’. like bitches are literally fully convinced if you prefer acting out certain ideas in fiction but not irl, thats not your normal preferential boundaries but rather your brain is a mental illness BOMB and you need to be fucking hospitalized for being imaginative and having autonomy. like yall if its not taboo or smth shut uuuuhp man you’re not ‘concerned for their health’ or w/e you’re fully just tryna get away with being a nihilistic asshole who lacks sympathetic reasoning skills. listen to me. fiction is valuable. the thoughts we have on it are important. the personal lack of value you happen to put on a media is next to worthless. its not a fuckin waste of time dude, creators are people, who live in the real world, they experience it and have ideas through it and about it, they form and tweak their ideas while still definitely existing in the real world, and then put that back into the world with a new angle and new perspective, to share with other people definitely encountering it in , you guessed it , the real world. thats not disconnected. its not nothing. these things do not magically appear from fairytale land, they are created. stories mean smth, people tell them for a reason, its ok to feel smth for any story, why would we even tell them if not with the intention to impact others emotionally somehow i mean??? fiction does not Just affect reality, it is valuable to real life society, it is a functioning thriving part OF reality.

humans have told stories since the dawn of our existence. it is literally all but an inherent species trait for us to imagine things, its tied to each and every one of us, and to reject ‘fantasy’ as smth worthless to human life is frankly just fuckin wrong and weird of you. bitch we are Supposed to get outside the box, the fandom ppl you cringe your pants over arent thinking abt fake shit too much, you guys very often just arent exercising abstract thought and imagination enough, which actually hurts your ability to engage with it critically in all the ways its meant to be. if you dont see the value in fiction its because you put in no effort to form the analysis skills. in other words, you idiots dont get the hype bc you’re too stupid to get how you're supposed to compare a book to the real world it came from. ‘uu but cmon not everythings valuable what about [tumblr designated cringe media]-’ 1. ok! somehow you havent come to this conclusion yourself yet but thats not real, whatever ppl get to enjoy is not all abt you, your bias means less than dirt to others outside of hivemind social medias, you can keep it to yourself, ppl shouldnt care about it bc it means nothing outside of ur own space, its literally funny to me that you’re so elitist you want me to cater my interests to you, Your Standard Of Quality Isnt Universal, 2. ranking the values of fiction is the waste of time here, if you compare mlp to pride and prejudice ill dissect your teeth, different emotional impacts from tragic to funny to Just A Vibe are all able to be assessed as ‘valuable to somebody else so leave well enough alone’ if you dont have 2010+ funnyman brainrot disease that makes you incapable of reflecting on anything you can find a way to joke abt first.

i mean seriously like. whenever randos start engaging with medias you ppl dont like or in ways you dont get, the strawmans yall make up to get to be cringe culture vultures abt such benign shit, and almost Always at the expense of neurodivergent people with a deeply rooted undertone of extreme ableism might i add..... its just so selfish. u have a brain ok, you’re manipulative but we both know you dont Actually think ppl automatically default to being a waifu obsessed incel rotting away at their basement computer, stagnating their social skills and straying further and further from reality with each passing day, a poor disturbed wretch that you just HAVE to save from themselves, all bc they say they. prefer fictional porn or w/e to having sex irl. buddy thats not a big deal, theyre normal, just different from you. theyre fine, you’re just uncomfortable. as a functioning adult you’re gonna have to try and recognize that sometimes that feelings gonna be 100% on you, and you cant always just lie abt the validity of it to make ppl feel obligated into agreeing with you. this is gonna be one fragment of their personhood and your self obsessed brain imploding over how unrelatable that is doesnt fucking matter, grow up bitch like. how detached do you have to be to think thats so unstable or morally wrong.... its just a completely inconsequential preferential decision that only affects them and isnt a wrong choice at all cuz nobody has to get their dick wet if they dont wanna for any reason ever and thats gotta be that tbh.... and it kills me cuz they still inherently experience the real world and are capable of thinking abt it critically,,, even tho they... masturbate to drawings or w/e the fuck ppl think is unhealthy ???? like? imagination is just fun we dont need to moderate it anymore than we moderate other fun activities i mean lol ksdjfsd this is the DEFINITION of ‘just vibing’ no one FUCKING cares and it deosnt fucking matter the way you desperately try to make ppl think it does just so u get to be loud abt ur shortcomings as a decent understanding person.

‘uuuuuu im sorry but thats unhealthy :///’ you sound like a goddamn maniac dude stories are not unhealthy having feelings abt them is not unhealthy thinking some anime bitch that was DRAWN TO BE HOT , IS HOT, is not UNHEALTHY and you clowns arent convincing anybody you ‘care’ abt that concept anyways !! im losign my mind here skdlsdfsd medias are literally DESIGNED TO DO THIS TO PEOPLE... WE’RE SUPPOSED TO FEEL THINGS FOR IT.... IT IS WHAT MAKES THE ART WE’VE TAKEN PART IN FOR CENTURIES, “ART”.... ITS JUST... HAVING IDEAS AND EXPERIENCING IMAGINATION..... whats wildly unhealthy actually is yalls toxic obsession with ‘harsh truth’ and validating your stupid ass cwinge feewings to the point where everything that gives your underdeveloped selfish ass hives has to be a matter of health and morals and whats ‘best’ for everyone. u dont know that shit!!!! ur a petty brat and im not ur mommy ok i wont baby you so u dont feel like the shitty whiny person you are, you need to grow and do better and think outside urself already, dont put the responsibility of making u feel right for judging somebodies benign hobbies on me. i wont bc its wrong and unnecessary. you’re not a savior no ones falling for that lmao you’re just a bitch girl xoxo get over it shit truly does not matter. let them write nsfw self insert fics instead of banging !!

to make it real do yall really not Get that basic consent kinda doesnt just mean ‘no when im not in the mood at the time’ but it means ‘no if i just dont fuckin feel like having sex ever for literally any reason at all bc i choose what i do’ and pressuring them, even with what your warped brain translates as the best of intentions, is inherently disgusting? especially with the ‘i know how to help you’ attitude like......... ohhh die soonly ew lmao! lay off this nasty shit already please it doesnt matter! stop trying to make it matter!! its not hurting you or them you stupid tumblr phd ass!! and like again yeah some media shits just truly gross but tbr now its like even That kind of shit, the Real social issues caused by Actually problematic media that ppl should discuss Genuinely without ulterior motives, is being used more and more rampantly as just a stepping stone to get to the needless mockery of other harmless things in the media they want an excuse to bag on.......... like a bitch cant just be grown and talk about problems at face value without getting a bully jab in. smhhhhh you all fuckin suck please just stop talking already. so anyways yeah being attracted to fictional characters instead of real people or w/e IS funny, funny how many boyfriends they have when u have none xoxo theyre having fun and you can die sad abt it they get to die 5 times in an angsty fantasy fic and be brought back with mouth to mouth by fuckin kakashi every time and then they go get lunch irl while ur updating tinder bitch ... different fucking strokes ig !

#long post//#i would like one free ticket to pop off please. thank you #can i cash it in immediately if you dont mind

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semercury · 4 years

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18. characters you want to wrap in a blanket and tell them they’re going to be okay?

oh gosh, so many ;^; i know part 5 in particular sent my maternal instinct into overdrive and i just aaaaa they’re all BABIES i want them to be SAFE and HAPPY and LOVED. WHY DOESN’T ARAKI FEED GIORNO??? HE IS HUNGRY! HE WANTED PIZZA!!! HE HAD ONE (1) BITE OF BREAD IN ALL OF PART 5!! PLEASE GET THIS CHILD SOME FOOD HE IS SO TINY IN COMPARISON TO ALL THE OTHER JOJOS!

legit just. all the vent oreo characters. fugo is an obvious answer. my son. he needs a blanket and some tea. he’s gonna be okay. it’s gonna be okay, baby. narancia is Just Baby. want to tuck him in. kiss his forehead. tell him goodnight and sweet dreams. mista is gonna be okay. like, u kno, sometimes when the ocd hits, u just gotta wrap urself up real tight in a blanket and pretend ur a baby bc swaddling legit causes a calming response, which is why you basically put babies in straight jackets. bro, i KNOW how hard it is. it’s gonna be okay. get yaself a blanket. u gonna be okay. trish, my GOSH has this girl been through some shit. grief is a hell of a thing and like? u don’t get over it! u just get used to it! give her a blanket and a strong shoulder! i love her. i want to tell her things will eventually be okay. one day at a time, hun. just breathe. things will eventually feel okay. we already went over giorno but like. give him food and a blanket. it’s What He Deserves. he doesn’t deserve any of that shit. let him feel LOVED. mom? cancelled. dad? cancelled. step dad? cancelled. i’m his parent now. my child now. bruno needs a blanket and some calming tea and like. some blood pressure medication. is this man okay? like is he okay?? can we please help this man to be okay? he was like, what, ten and was like “guess i’m an adult now” and took charge like hello?? let him relax!! please, he’s 20 and he’s going to die of a heart attack at like any minute.

abbacchio is a tricky one. bc yes, i want to wrap him in a blanket too and tell him he’s going to be okay. but like. he won’t believe me. and he’s not missing a parental figure. his issue is with himself. and if i wrap him in a blanket, i’m not shielding him from his demons, bc he is his demons. so instead i throw a blanket at his face and tell him to get therapy. bc i need to stop being a free therapist for everyone, even fictional characters. sorry buddy, ur getting the boot from me i guess. bc no amount of external love will help him in the end. like i’ve said it before, at least in passing, but like. all the rest of them got put in bad situations and had bad things happen to them. abbacchio was most responsible for his shitty outcome. we can blame the corrupt system, but ultimately he’s the one who took the bribe. and i can love and comfort these damaged people and attempt to make up for the bad things that happened to them externally (which i know still ultimately won’t help. it never has. i can’t fix people, no matter how hard i try), but it’s even harder to do when it’s all internal. he needs to come to terms with himself. but like. he still gets a blanket. (and i suppose in the very end, he did come to terms with it. he got his blanket and knows it’ll be okay.)

this went place. i’m very sorry jflkjdsl.

#ask #auralime

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taegiiseok · 6 years

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god okay so this is going under a cut because I have some things to say and the recent allforbts thing has kinda prompted me into word vomiting finally abt it but it’s been on my mind for a while and I’ve just rlly gotta say these things so,,, don’t mind me I just need to ramble. For some emotionally charged bangtan related rambling pls read more

Now I’ve been an army for a while now, I’d say a dedicated stan since early 2016, and before that I was just aware of them as a whole but I stopped paying attention to kpop for a while there and it was unfortunately during their debut days,,, I always wish I had started paying close attention again sooner because these boys changed my life. And I don’t say that lightly,, I mean it with every ounce of sincerity I can muster. They made me happy, and they made me realize that just giving up isn’t the answer when u rlly want something. They let me know that they’re unafraid to be sincere with their feelings so I shouldn’t be afraid of being sincere in mine either. They literally opened my eyes when I needed it most and I’m forever grateful for that,, and I cannot express properly just how much respect and love I have for these men because of that. They’ve put so much of themselves into their music and into their careers and even when things weren’t picking up as quickly as they wanted they still pushed and carried on and idnskskns NO WORDS CAN TELL U HOW MUCH THOSE EXAMPLES MEAN TO ME. Their honesty and strength give me strength and I just,,,, I LOVE THEM. TO END THIS RAMBLING BIT HERE,, I rlly rlly love them. I’d do a lot for their happiness because they’ve given me the tools to take back some of my own happiness and there’s rlly no way to show u,, or them,, all the gratitude I feel for that.

SO NOW THAT THATS OUTTA THE WAY & we’re clear on all of the above,, I now want to say that I have a deep love for my fellow armys that are truthful on why they stan and that feel a deeper connection for the boys other than just on a shallow level. If ur here for the right reasons and u just want to show the boys support in any way possible, I support u !! I love u and I would love to speak abt the boys with u if u ever need a friend ! Wanna talk abt how much they motivate u ? Let’s do it up boo ! Wanna speak abt mental health issues ? I know abt those on a personal level babe ! U just wanna cry abt how cute one of them looked on a certain day ?? Come my way,, I GOTCHU !! I am an open ear and there is always an open door to my inbox and messager if any of u ever want to talk because I care abt ur well being. I care abt u. I care abt the boys and I care abt my fellow armys because at the end of the day we all are striving for happiness and peace of mind in this world and why not have an open heart to that ?? At least, that’s what this fandom was originally abt. Being here for bangtan and being there for our fellow armys.

That’s kinda what it’s always been abt in my mind and to see how toxic things have gotten in the last year ((specifically the last few months I’d say)) with streaming and voting and buying albums and singles to chart and whatnot like gUYS...... they just want your support ? They just want to make us happy with their music and performances because doing what they do makes them happy and seeing people LITERALLY try to guilt others into thinking they’re not real fans because they aren’t buying the title track fifteen times,, or they can’t afford to buy all 4 albums at least once, or they’re not promoting as hard as they can is 😣😣😣 SO BEYOND RIDICULOUS TO ME. It’s gross !!! It’s not right and it isn’t what bangtan are abt ?? These boys have always been sincere with us,,, always wanted to shoot for the stars but would always fall short and once they started gaining some real traction and reaching those stars they stopped aiming so high. The boys are happy! They have accomplished so much, and they never expect /anything/ from us as fans. They only wish for our happiness and support. They’ve said it time and time again and yet we still have people leading lynches against others for not voting on stupid polls ? For not hashtagging every tweet with a voting or trending tag for our favs ? For not being able to afford to buy albums or singles ?? Or hell,, some are even saying others need to put forth more of their effort to contact people they don’t know to let them buy singles for them ?? Really ?? It’s truly gotten so bad and I’m so sad whenever I open social media anymore 😔 people have lost sight of what the whole purpose of stanning a group even means & idk ,, it just breaks my heart.

If u only want to support bangtan by trying to break records they don’t even hope to break then go ahead but don’t shame others for not joining u. Let people be a fan and show support in their own ways and just know that even if some of us aren’t publically claiming to buy so many albums and so many singles,, we very well may be doing that on our own and out of the goodness in our hearts because we want the best for the boys that make our lives a little bit brighter. The recognition for awards and records just isn’t at the forefront of our minds because their music and happiness comes first, and so do ours. Its also not nice to pressure others into doing something they may not be able to do.

And at the end the day we all have our own lives and own narratives to live out,, and not all of those narratives involve intensively stanning a boy group we love 25/7. WE GOTTA WORK AND MAKE A NAME FOR OURSELVES BABES WE DONT GOT TIME FOR THAT AND THE BOYS UNDERSTAND AND SUPPORT THAT!! THEY DONT WANT ANY OF U,,, AND I MEAN //ANY// OF U PUTTING THEM BEFORE YOURSELF !!

It’s like they said in magic shop,, we gave them the best of them so we need to give us the best of us,,, and if that means putting urself before them sometimes ?? BLS DO OHMYGODBDJS TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF !! Break some personal records for urself !! Buy ur own mixtape fuxkdnsn IDK JUST ,,, loving bangtan is good and they’re amazing and I would love everyone to show their support for them but I say that because those boys want u to support u first. Don’t listen to people telling u you’re a bad fan because unless ur starting rumours and stalking them ur rlly not !! There is no such thing as a bad fan if ur just trying to show support for artists that u rlly love in your own way.

OKAY IM DONE. I HAD TO SAY SOMETHING BECAUSE THAT ASK RLLY SET ME OFF AND THEN I STARTED THINKING ABT THE LIVES AND LOGS THE BOYS HAVE DONE AND EVERY TOUR DATE THEYVE PUT THEIR ALL INTO AND HOW MUCH THEY GIVE US AND WHILE WE GIVE THEM BACK SO MUCH IN RETURN THEYRE ALWAYS SAYING ITS ENOUGH AND I JUST RLLY WANT TO REMIND PEOPLE THAT YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT IS ALWAYS ENOUGH !! YOU ARE ENOUGH !!

I LOVE U 💞

#personal #ish #idk #I NEEDED TO SPEAK

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