youve heard of sex flowers get ready for the flower that makes you into a celestial shoujo herione complete with particle effects you cannot turn the fuck off and creates a wifebeam so powerful it can incapacitate and maim and keeps making you burst into tears and fall on your ass which makes the wifebeam More Powerful and you also cannot turn this off either.
and is also still, sort of, a sex flower
from one of my favorite fanfictions, Celestial Afterglow by elanor_pam, a fic that defies description in the best possible way
lmao guess whos activated ✨blathering oaf mode✨ again (clue: its me)
(cut because length and spoilers, read at your own peril)
so this post got me spiralling into detective mode again and yes i know douglas suggesting it might have been war/pollution but i have certified trust issues™ and i dont believe that for one darn second
BUT
i also don't think it's a kiss. lemme explain horrifically
so i took another look at the two frames we have of The Leaked Smooch™ and the background has a lot to be desired (if you take into account that the boys are taking up most of the frame (duh), plus already fairly average quality video PLUS compression from when i captured it)
but i think we can safely rule out that The Leaked Smooch™ doesn't happen in the theatre here, mainly because even though the quality is bad, the glasses in the Smooch™ are crowley's modern ones, not the ones we saw him wear in the 1941 flashback in s1, plus his hair is differently styled... so yes can pretty confidently say this is not the kiss we are looking for
so i wanted to pinpoint what era the theatre bit is actually set in, and therefore i set about identifying the theatre in question. turns out kids that im not a good researcher (despite it literally being my job) so it took FUCKING AGES but i eventually found set photos of the boys entering a theatre, specifically the hippodrome in bo'ness:
now this was a turn-up for the books, because that's crowley's 1941 costume right??? id recognise that iconic fit anywhere. az's costume is trickier to pinpoint bc he wears the same damn thing but pretty sure this is a match to the church scene:
so we know from s1 that we have the church scene yada yada, and crowley offers aziraphale a lift home... which we know he accepts given that the s2 trailer gives us the ✨Dinner of '41✨ scene:
the other bit however to this puzzle is that there ALSO a set pic of aziraphale at the hippodrome in his magician's outfit. given the frame from the trailer where he looks like he's about to brick it going on stage, surrounded by lovely burlesque girlies and dame siân phillips in period dress, AND there were extras on the set dressed in ww2-type army uniforms, so i think it can be fairly surmised that this bit also occurs in the 40s
so my thought process is that we're getting two separate scenes (kinda) from the 40s, we have the church bit from s1 plus the Dinner of '41 scene as its own entity, but then, like
aziraphale is doing his magic act as a side hustle to this burlesque show? and crowley turns up to watch him, hiding out up in the box?
if we follow this completely made up narrative ive just come up with, aziraphale, im assuming, finishes up and gets changed into his normal clothes, and then goes up to this box to meet crowley?
to this end, i captured and slowed down the bit in the opening sequence where aziraphale and crowley (sorry douglas, not buying it) are in the box... and-
now to my eye, the motion of them in the clip looks like they are dancing? i don't have the source to hand but we've had it confirmed that a choreographer was brought into s2, not impossible az would go up to meet crowley after his magic act, whilst there's still something going on on the stage, and the two end up dancing or something? and az bless his heart gets spooked from that?
im reasonably convinced that this might be the origin of the 'you go too fast for me' line - something happens and ultimately aziraphale gets spooked given that he's only just realised he has Feelings for crowley, and so my boy fucking legs it (a lil post i made a while ago about this exact scenario if you'd care to peruse)
other thing to note:
there is a figure that is lurking behind aziraphale and crowley in the box, which looks like it moves specifically in sync with crowley, so it could be a shadow, or someone/thing is in the box that they aren't aware of 👀 so maybe this thing (?) witnesses it all? whatever went down in the box?
so in my addled feral mind, ive come up with a speculation that even as im breathing life into it sounds unhinged and so implausible it's hilarious -
i put to you, members of the jury, that something was meant to happen in that box, and it didn't... that something being that crowley makes a move of some kind - kiss, dance, hug, declaration, WHATEVER - and aziraphale was meant to accept it/reciprocate/idk, but didn't.
and that fucks with the plan, and for lack of better terminology creates a nexus event (lmao thanks loki) which in turns starts screwing with other events, somewhat like i theorised in this post here tehe
are aziraphale and crowley, essentially, the earth's endgame? idk about u but ive read enough angst fics to know that it's not inconceivable that crowley and aziraphale's mere existence may have been part of god's plan to represent free will on earth, defend humankind, and give balance and meaning to it
so what would happen if aziraphale essentially rejected that? did the most human thing possible and resisted the plan? idk i feel at this point i am just writing a fic and this will all be ludicrously incorrect bUT half the fun is torturing yourself over your own theories right 🙃
I ran so fast lmao, reverse Pip belongs to @blues-sues once more!
Not so different
Mud and grit rubbed against his fur and skin uncomfortably in a way that made his skin crawl, the texture was unpleasant for him, though he was thankful he hadn't gotten too much of the mud in his wounds let alone his eyes. He felt his eyelid twitch in discomfort at the thought of it. A wet cloth didn't bring much comfort especially with the cold water it brought but it cleaned him off, slowly but surely.
Her aura flickered faintly in waves and rolls dancing and fading from his psychic sight, he didn't know the name of the color of her shape but it didn't look like the others, it felt fuzzy and softer making him feel a bit more safe and comfortable. The clean water splashed in its bucket as she dipped a new piece of fabric in, wringing it off and wiping away more of the mud he was coated in, the texture of grit on her own fingertips was unpleasant but she continues on, faintly they could hear others talking arguing about something that didn't concern them right now and he'd found he was getting a lot better at tuning out background noises even with his hearing being heightened.
Water droplets slid down his arm falling off of him into the sopping wet ground beneath, Muddy Water had certainly done its job. His head twitched and jerked as he felt a water droplet forming on his temple slowly sliding down to his eye sockets head twitching uncomfortably trying to shake it off, he wanted to paw at his face but his hands were still filthy and being cleaned off he could put grit in his sockets, the thought of a water droplet pooling in his eyes caused his twitching to increase.
He stilled feeling a hand move to his shoulder, water droplet still threateningly moving as his brow furrowed before a dry towel brushed past the side of his face slowly and gently up to his horn, and then it passed over his forehead collecting up the offending water droplet and any more moisture and then against the other side of his face to his horn on that side, his fur still felt moist but the thick droplets of water were gone and his anxiety began to lessen. It was a simple act but, used to having his discomforts being ignored it did bring a rush of relief.
He felt the wet cloth carefully return to cleaning off his arm of the persistent mud, cleaning the back of his hand and fingers. He swallowed quietly in thought, mouth opening and shutting again with barely a hum or croak.
".....tha….aank…" channeling his inner thoughts to be outer thoughts was harder than he had thought it would be, he could feel his temple already beginning to ache from the strain of projecting his speech, "yooouuu," it was something of a breathy exhale despite not being pushed through his lungs, he couldn't even recognise his own voice but it should have been enough. Judging by the stilling of her hand he must have heard her and it wasn't for naught.
Unfortunately he could not see the smile nor the mouthed "you're welcome," before she returned to cleaning off his hand cleaning grit from between his fingers gently. His mouth twitched awkwardly and he felt his eyebrows furrowing as he wondered why she wasn't responding to him, was he not really worth it?
As she cleaned his hand the frown on his face was noticed, as was the subtle attempt to pull his hand away from her wanting to pull away and just dunk the clean water over himself and hope that it got the dirt off and he could be alone. He felt her squeeze his digits gently and he stilled just a little as he frowned to himself before she moved his hand which was strange. He allowed it though. His damp digits made contact with skin. She was warm as she put his fingers carefully to her throat she could feel his knuckles under her chin, he wasn't sure what to make of it until he detected the texture difference.
Without her guide his finger tips traced up and down a small section of her throat feeling over the scarred tissue compared to the unscarred tissue, he stopped on the scar tissue slowly feeling across one way and then feeling across the other feeling the size of the scar. He pulled his hand away slowly and touched his fingertip to his own neck feeling the scarring there before moving to put his fingers back, attempting to find her scar again and with some guidance his fingers bumped against her scarred tissue once more.
She couldn't talk either, just like him except humans don't have telepathy. He tilted his head a bit as he stared forward without seeing as though looking at her, her hands took his and moved his touch away but he felt her softly pat the back of his hand and she squeezed his hand with hers once more and this time he didn't feel as though it was a weak attempt of crushing his hand bones. There was a quiet moment as she held his hand squeezing it softly with hers, the warmth seeming to travel up his arm through him before returning with a slosh of clean water and cloth to clean the mud from his person as it still uncomfortable caked his chest and other arm.
hi story time I have a lazy eye, which means that one of my eyes is REALLY BAD and just kinda turns off sometimes (aka its a lot weaker than my other eye and cant stay open as long, also means that sometimes if I'm overstimulated I can only have one eye open at a time)
so this eye will just kinda wander when it gets tired but currently the best method to get it to stop (and prevent permanent or long lasting damage to my eyes) is to close the bad eye so it can go sleepy sleep.
SO LONG STORY SHORT to stop myself from majorly fucking up my eyes I have to make this face
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• JACK SAYS...
*wakes up in medbay after blacking out* wuh… where am i… *sees cracked visor* ahhhhh ahhhh… *imposter eye starts to glow* shoot ah what am i gonna do… *hears footsteps puts eyepatch around my visor*
BISEXUALITY PRIDE METER: 500%[ ████████████████ ] If You're Proud To Be A Bisexual,
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now that I've hacked both my 3DS and Vita I can say, while all the people who take the time to make guides online have been nothing but kind and helpful, there is such a difference in expectations between the two communities lol. When I wanted to make custom themes for my 3DS there were so many community-built tools available for the computer to help you put things together while having basically zero technical knowledge. I try to do the same for my Vita and the guides I do find are like "anyway so obviously you know XML" and just go from there like they haven't already lost me
ok for real I know they were limited in their options for explaining Stiles’ actions because DOB didnt come back but like SERIOUSLY. I have so many questions and complaints and not even all of them are Stydia related….. spoilers obviously
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Uhhh I can’t figure out how to add a read more on mobile sorry folks hopefully this is a good enough buffer !!!!!
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Did…. Did anyone bother to tell Stiles that Allison is alive?  are we meant to believe that nobody did?? or what’s worse, that he was told and he just didn’t come to Beacon Hills or call or anything?
On that note, are we actually supposed to believe — and I am not a Sterek girlie by any means, love and light to y’all but it’s just not my cup of tea — that Derek fucking DIED and there was a whole ass memorial service that Stiles just didn’t bother to show up to???? HELLO????
I mean it’s also nearing levels of ‘spn finale Dean Winchester ending’ stupid that Derek died in the first place, given that his whooooole character arc (by my book, anyway) is springing from the place of his trauma, and the way that he has blamed himself, struggled with guilt and loneliness and has been atoning for all of the pain of what he perceives to be personal failures the ENTIRE TIME, never letting himself get too close to people, never asking for help, and instead sacrificing for and nurturing Scott as the ideal alpha that he feels he couldn’t be… I don’t know. It just feels like a needless sacrifice to me, like there are so many ways that you can restrain someone and prevent them from moving from the place where you need to. Oh I don’t know burn them alive ?maybe? Which don’t involve sacrificing yourself and burning alive yourself, right in front of your son and the rest of your loved ones. I know again there are production factors at play, maybe it’s likely that they knew damn well Tyler H wouldn’t or couldn’t come back for another movie so they decided to kill off his character?? but suffice to say I was not happy with that at all (and not in the way I think it was INTENDED to upset me.)
Anyway, I know that Stiles needed to be absent because Dylan O’Brien was not a part of this movie, but if I’m being honest, I kind of would rather that Stiles had died ! Obviously I love Stiles’s character and it’s not that I want him dead at all!! it’s just. if they were going to fully send it, and they know he’s not coming back, and they knew that they were going to make up this premonition dream to break up Stydia and (poorly) explain his absence, then it would’ve done a lot better to make that separation as permanent as in life and death. The Stiles we know would never want to be separated from the people he loves as much as he has been now because of all of the external, real life factors. In fact, the season arc with the ghost riders proved to us just how far Stiles can and would go to be present! It was aaaactually a whole thing ! So, if I’m being honest… (1) the way that he and Lydia parted, (2) the way that he isn’t present or even mentioned in the light of his loved ones dying/being resurrected, and (3) again the fact that he wasn’t even at Derek’s memorial … it all feels like a silent character assassination to me. It feels like the mentioning of “Stiles” in this new canon contains less essence of Stiles than it would’ve if he had died. I know it’s easy to have a hater moment and make criticisms and piss and moan about how I would’ve done it better, and I know it’s not always as easy as it sounds… but JESUS CHRIST
Also congrats to the sterek girlies on your own personal y yo a ti moment……that jeep shit was CRAZY
not quite a love confession, but i feel like you would be a great person to go to a series of small and weird museums with
This is genuinely one of the best compliments I have ever gotten- anon, you GET me. I have an actual, literal list of weird museums I want to visit, and it grows every time i discover the existence of a new one. Hit me up if you're ever on the east coast of the US and we can make a road trip schedule, starting with the mothman museum in point pleasant WV. I'm a pretty damn good baker, so I am the queen of road trip snacks :D