#so anyways i probably won’t deactivate my account but if this post is 3 months old and i haven’t posted since it’s because i deleted the app | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

put-a-lil-alright-in-the-world · 4 years

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big boy announcement time

hiya, y’all! this is a post i’ve had scheduled for about a month now because otherwise i feel like i’ll be a little coward and back out. but, deep breath, here goes.

i’m going to be going permanently inactive on this blog, starting tomorrow. it sucks, but this website is taking up a lot of my time and i really do have to focus more on my school stuff and extracurriculars, and that’s kinda tough when i’m also spending hours on here. my fic will hopefully continue to update, but it’ll be exclusively on ao3 (find me at @maketheworldalittlecolorful on ao3!)

i won’t be deactivating my blog, though, because i want my hc lists and other writing to remain in one place in case anyone wants to peep em (here’s hoping!)

i’m gonna miss you guys a ton! seriously, it’s been a lot of fun here, and i’ve really liked writing for and interacting with you all. this is an insanely talented fandom, and i’m really happy i had the chance to be a part of it. if you wanna message me, i’ll be checking asks and messages for the rest of the day!

thank you to the people who encouraged me to actually write stuff and made me feel like my contributions were valid, and thank you SO MUCH to the people who made their own contributions! i literally read every fic i could find, and there are some crazy talented people here. and if you’re someone who’s still writing a fic that i’m reading, i promise i’ll keep following it on ao3 (@daydreaming-jessi i will forever be addicted to i’m a bunch of broken pieces!)

and...what would a final exeunt be without a couple of hot takes that i’ve been keeping inside for a while? so lemme drop em here now that any sort of harassment i receive will be falling on deaf (or rather, inactive) ears:

calling those who criticize the glorification of pedophilia “fascists” and “nazis” is actually really harmful. it turns “fascist” and “nazi” into buzzwords that you use to attack people who disagree with you, and considering the resurgence of fascist and nazi ideals in recent years, is just not in good taste.

“Libel” and “Defamation” are synonyms, and also probably don’t mean what you think they do. sorry.

Simulated CP (e.g. drawings of child porn) is actually illegal and the only reason that people aren’t calling the police on those who create it is because of the anonymity the internet provides. it’s the same reason that you can post on here that you use illegal drugs, but you probably won’t get arrested for it. it’s not about the legality, it’s about the fact that there’s simply no way for us to provide an address when reporting.

your past can explain, but not excuse your actions, especially when they are harmful towards others. a past of abuse or neglect or anything else should never be wished upon others, but you also can’t use it as a blanket statement to justify anything you want to do or say to others. especially as an adult, you need to seek healthy ways to deal with your past that don’t involve attacking teenagers online

beetleb*bes may not all be pedophiles, but they all glorify pedophilia. if you are writing or drawing romantic and sexual interactions between a minor and an adult in a positive light, you are glorifying pedophilia. and if you do so, don’t get mad when actual pedophiles suddenly seem to be really comfortable around you.

graphic descriptions of sexual acts are not a clever response to genuine criticism. sorry.

and, finally, if you’re an adult who spends your days attacking kids because they disagree with you on fandom discourse, you should a) stop immediately because that’s harassment, and b) seek help because that’s just not healthy. i think y’all can probably guess which adult woman i’m referring to here. and if you are her and you happen to be reading this, just know that i honestly found your constant harassment funny (albeit a little sad). i didn’t post your asks because unfortunately you and your negativity don’t deserve a place on my blog. i cultivate a happy space, and i’m sorry that that angered you as much as it apparently did. you don’t have nearly as much power as you think you do, and outside the context of fandom you’re just a sad woman who spends her time harassing teenagers online. sorry.

anyways, that’s the tea, as the kidz say. if you disagree, feel free to send me an anon or whatever, but i’ll likely never see it on account of the whole “leaving this website” thing. i hope y’all do get a chuckle out of it if this ends up on that godawful receipts blog.

sincerely, though, i will miss you guys. i hope you guys enjoyed some of the stuff i wrote, or my awful memes, or anything else i brought to the fandom. i also hope i have some sort of legacy here, even if it’s just with starting all of my headcanons with “ok so”. i’m sad to be leaving, but it’s on to bigger and better things for me, and this blog is just taking up so much of my time. you’re all so cool, and keep on keeping on.

yours,

remy <3

#i'm gonna miss you guys #but there are things this kid must do that simply cannot happen when i'm spending hours a day on here #<3 #and i say this for the last time....#remy speaks

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ifishouldvanish · 5 years

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Font Recs/Typography Tips

@weatheredlaw was looking for some font recs and I was kinda planning on doing a font rec/typography tutorial post thing anyways, so here goes:

(I got carried away!)

1. A NOTE ABOUT ORGANIZING FONTS

Okay so... first of all-- I highly recommend using FontBase to manage your font files (It’s free and it’s available for Mac, Windows, and even Linux). The reason being, that as you install more and more fonts on your computer, the font menu in Photoshop will start to load really slowly. Which gets really frustrating really fast.

FontBase lets you organize your fonts into neat lil folders and activate/deactivate them as needed with a click, so you can keep the Font Menu Bloat at bay. There’s also a premium version (aptly called ‘Awesome’) that costs $3 a month and has some nifty extra features, but that’s neither her nor there. Yes, I throw three of my hard-earned dollars at them every month.

Also? If you have a work computer and a home computer, you can install FontBase on both systems and point it to a Dropbox or Google Cloud folder so that your font collection always stays in sync across both devices. 👌✨

2. WHERE TO FIND FONTS

Google Fonts So... Google Fonts is technically a webfont CDN, but all of the actual font files are available for free download from their Github repo. Alternatively, you can use FontBase to sync them directly to your computer. Which is nifty.

What I like about the Google Fonts library is 1) there’s some really NICE, high-quality font families available, and 2) it’s easily searchable.

So pop on over, play with the search filters, and if you find something you like, grab it off the Git Repo or sync it via FontBase.

League of Moveable Type It’s a free, open-source font foundry. How cool is that? The selection is pretty small, but there’s a lot of typographic staples to be found, and the quality is top notch 👌✨

Free Design Resources FDR is a great site for all kinds of design resources, but their font offerings are the most impressive. Particularly, it’s a great place to look for handwriting, script, or any other kind of ‘display’ fonts. 99% of them are demo versions of not-free fonts, but really that just means they don’t include special characters, which lbr you probably don’t need anyway.

Creative Market So as the name suggests, Creative Market is a marketplace for design resources. AKA the stuff ain’t free. HOWEVER, every week, they offer six products for free download-- a mix of fonts, textures, photo packs, etc. So create an account (it’s free) and keep an eye out for the weekly freebies.

Design Cuts This is another site that isn’t really free, though they do have a small selection of free stuff. I figured it’s worth mentioning because a lot of the fonts and textures I use, I buy from here. Every month (or two weeks? Or something?) they compile a bundle of about 20 products (be it typefaces, texture packs, or filters/actions/etc) and offer it at a massive discount (usually $30). Their stuff is always really great quality, so if they release a bundle that feels worthwhile to me, I bite. (As of this writing, they actually have bundle of some textures, fonts, and other assets available for $2)

3. A PRIMER ON DIFFERENT KINDS OF TYPEFACES

So most people are probably already aware of the categories of Serif, Sans Serif, and Display fonts. But you can split Serif and Sans Serifs up into further categories.

Here are four kinds of Serifs: Humanist, Transitional, Modern, and Slab.

The most immediate difference between these types of serifs is the stroke widths.

If you look at the modern/didone serif Bodoni, the horizontal strokes are hairline thin, and the vertical strokes are very thick. Modern/Didone typefaces are characterized by this extreme contrast in their stroke widths, and typically have a perfectly vertical axis (meaning the narrowest parts of the strokes are at the exact top and bottom of the letterform, as illustrated by the green dotted line). These features give them a bold, modern, and stylish feel.

The humanist serif Minion has the least contrast in its stroke widths, and has a diagonal stress (again, see the green dotted line). These features make them easy on the eyes and well-suited for paragraphs of text and small font sizes. Humanist typefaces most closely resemble calligraphy, and thus have an elegant, classic feel.

Transitional serifs are, well... transitional. They have more stroke width contrast than humanist serifs, but not quite enough to be considered modern/didone, and may or may not have an angled stress. Their ‘voice’ is more neutral, academic, and timeless.

Slabs Serifs, as the name suggests, are kinda blocky. The stroke widths are generally very solid and consistent, and the actual serifs (or ‘feet’) are... y’know. Fat blocks. It makes these typefaces feel more casual, more down-to-earth, approachable, and perhaps playful? A lil rebellious, even?

So with that out of the way, here are some different types of Sans Serifs: (There’s a point to all of this, I swear.)

Unlike Humanist Serifs, Humanist Sans Serifs actually have the most contrast in their stroke widths. In the above image, this is most apparent on the lowercase ‘a’. Again, this feature makes humanist sans serifs easy on the eyes and optimal for paragraphs of text. Compared to other sans serifs, they tend to have a more casual and approachable personality.

Transitional Sans Serifs will have little to no stroke width contrast. They maintain their readability at small sizes, and their ‘voice’ is very neutral, which makes them easy to use in a wide variety of designs. There’s a reason Helvetica is the go-to for many a graphic designer: it, along with many other Grotesks/Gothics, almost never feels out of place. They’re the chameleons of fonts. They’re versatile. Invisible. Carbon-neutral.

Geometric Sans Serifs, as the name suggests, are typefaces whose letterforms are based on geometry. O's and C's that are (mostly) perfectly circular, V's, W's and M's with sharp, consistent angles. They generally have very consistent stroke widths, but the harsh angles make them poorly suited to paragraphs of text. They feel modern, technical, and stylish.

4. CHOOSING THE RIGHT FONT

(We are now arriving at the point.)

Here are some questions to ask yourself before choosing a font:

How much text do I have?

If you have a lot of text, you’ll want something that’s easy on the eyes for reading. Aim for things with mild stroke contrasts and favor things with a diagonal axis. Basically, you can’t go wrong with a humanist typeface here-- be it serif or sans serif.

Now, for graphics and gifs, you’ll probably have a lot of text almost... never. But if you’re ever designing something that does (like a magazine spread, or a brochure), it’s something to consider.

How much space do I have?

Let’s say you’re giffing a scene and you gotta cram a long caption onto a tiny 278px wide gif. You could just make the font size super tiny, sure. OR, you could look for a font with a narrow character width. A nice, robust type family will usually include Condensed or even Super and Ultra Condensed versions of the font, which will be much better suited to that purpose.

In these cases, you’ll probably want to avoid geometric sans serifs since those circular forms are very wide, relatively speaking. But some geometric type families (such as Futura) do have Condensed varieties:

How large or small does the text need to be? (or do I want it to be?)

When your text is large, you can kinda go nuts and do whatever without worrying about anything getting hard to read. But there are two things to consider when you’re using a small font size, be it out of necessity or For the Aesthetique™--

stroke width contrast: At small font sizes, typefaces with consistent stroke widths are going to maintain their readability best-- so steer clear of Modern/Didone serifs, and tread carefully around Transitional Serifs. If you’re itching to use a Serif, you’ll want to look for a humanist/traditional/old style one. If you’re super attached to a modern/didone serif for a design (as I often am) understand you’re gonna have to compromise a bit and use a larger font size for it.

For sans serifs, both Transitional and Modern types will have nice, solid strokes that won’t get lost at small sizes.

x-height: A typeface's x-height refers literally to the height of the lowercase 'x'. But in more practical terms, it's the ratio of the heights of lowercase vs uppercase letters. If you plan on using all caps, this won't matter much (if at all), but if you will be using lowercase letters, a typeface with a more generous x-height will be easier to read at small sizes than a typeface with a small one.

Generally, Transitional/Grotesk/Gothic Sans-serifs will have the most generous x-heights (for example, see Helvetica). But x-heights vary a lot even within subcategories of typefaces, so be mindful of them!

Speaking of all these metrics... one of the things that makes the Premium version of FontBase well worth my $3 a month? The Super Search feature:

I can just... highlight segments of those histogram chart things on the right to filter out fonts that don’t have the contrast, weight, character width, or x-height I’m looking for. Like magic. #blessed

What ‘voice’ do I want to project?

I mentioned earlier how different styles of typefaces have different ‘personalities’. If you’re not sure whether to go with a Humanist or a Transitional Serif, remember that humanist ones tend to feel more elegant, more classic, more intimate. That Transitional ones tend to feel more objective, more confident, more business-like. Which makes more sense for your design?

After you’ve narrowed down your options with the above considerations, then you can start to be really subjective. Follow your heart. Pick whichever one has that certain je ne sais quoi. Or the one that has the ‘Q’ with the coolest tail. The one that just makes you feel a certain kinda way. Because it’s art. It’s design. Have fun with it.

5. SOME OF MY PERSONAL FAVORITE FONTS

So... my taste in typefaces is pretty conservative. I don’t really use handwriting, script, or display fonts. When I do, I tend to use them just the one (1) time and forget about their existence immediately afterward. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Most of these are tried and true Classics you may have already heard of, and some of them might even be default fonts bundled with your operating system. If not, be very careful looking for them, because it would be a terrible, horrible shame if you were to get your hands on one of the many freely available bootlegs of some of these typefaces... :/

With all these lined up together, you can get a better sense of how varied the x-heights can be from one typeface to another. For a particularly stark example, see Mrs Eaves vs Playfair Display, or Montserrat vs Neutra Text.

SooOoOoOoo... that’s a wrap? I guess?

Congratulations 🎉 you now know way more than I’m guessing you wanted to about typography.

#tutorial #typography

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ladyakahiko · 7 years

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So something happened to me a couple of weeks ago, and I’ve been searching for the correct words to use to express it. I have a very busy week ahead of me and I’d like to get this all out of my mind so I can focus on the tasks ahead. However, before I get into this, a little backstory is necessary. This is going to be VERY long, so bear with me.

Summer of 2008--I was taking a biology class at my local community college. There was a quiet guy who sat in the back of the room, looking rather awkward. Sometimes he didn’t have partners for his labs. I honestly felt kind of bad for him, so I made an effort to reach out and have a conversation when our class went on a field trip to Kensington Park. Nothing major, just little niceties and general small talk. I didn’t really think anything of it at the time.

Fast forward to winter of 2009--our group of friends in community college always spent time hanging out in hallway next to one of the auditoriums in the main student building. We had our laptops out and we were planning a huge spring break trip to Canada (because we were all at least 19 but not yet 21 and wanted to go there to drink). Many people also hung out in this area, it was a popular spot for all the nerdy gamers. While planning the trip and asking who was in, lo and behold the guy from my summer biology class comes up and says “I would be interested, here’s my number.” None of us really hung out with him that much, aside from the random rounds of Super Nintendo (we had TVs from the A/V department hooked up back there) or some Settlers of Catan. We thought it was a little creepy that he invited himself on such flimsy terms, so we didn’t call him.

Moving ahead again, to the fall of 2009. Many people from our central group of friends at community college transferred out to Western Michigan University. Some ended up coming the same semester as me, others waited until later. I was really excited and enjoying my orientation with new friends, when suddenly I see him--community college guy. He greets me, saying “wow, we’re both here, what a coincidence, huh?” I kind of nod in agreement, but feel slightly creeped out nonetheless.

This time let’s go a little further forward, to spring of 2012. There was a big group of us nerds who all always spent time in the main floor lounge of our dorm building. Community college guy was among them, but I didn’t think anything of it. He enjoyed playing Magic: the Gathering which we often were playing, so it just seemed natural for him to be around. But right before the end of the school year, I had a crush on one of my good friends from this group. Long story short, we liked each other, things got complicated, other girls entered the picture and there was a big dramatic night at one of the local clubs that we were all out dancing at. The next morning, I get a text from community college guy, saying: “well now that (crush) is out of the way, would you consider dating me?” I was extremely pissed off by his tactless attempt to pick me up THE DAY AFTER something so horrible happened. I told him no and firmly expressed my shock and anger, but he comes back with “but we both came out to Western Michigan from our community college! Did you ever think that maybe it’s fate?” I nearly threw up, and worried about what exactly his intentions were for coming to WMU in the first place...

A few months later in the summer of 2012, he asks me out again. I’m feeling very exhausted by his attempts so I say, “fine. One date.” Thinking that if I act like an uninterested bitch the whole time, maybe he’ll get the message and finally leave me alone. He responds back, “okay, when can you drive to (town) to meet me?” I still lived in our college town to work over the summer, he went home. He asked me out and then expected ME to drive nearly two hours to come meet him. I was furious and told him there was no way I was going to do that. In retrospect, caving in and saying yes that one time was probably a disastrous idea...

Go forward one more year to spring of 2013. College graduation ceremony, we made it! I’m there with my best bro Stephen, and we see (guy) in the crowd too so we invite him to join us. We all joke around through the ceremony and make fun off our exes who also happened to be graduating on the same day. After the ceremony we go back to our old dorm building to take pictures together. (Guy)’s parents are beaming and seem overly excited to be taking pictures with me in them... I think nothing of it though and just focus on my post-graduation plans.

Move on to the fall of 2014. I’m in Japan! I made it! My childhood dreams were finally coming true. I posted information about applying for the JET program and other ALT dispatch companies for any friends who might be interested in the program. (Guy) shows interest, asks me a few questions, and to proofread his application essay. It was pretty terrible and I didn’t have time to fix every little thing, I figured he didn’t really have much of a chance of getting here to Japan anyway since he didn’t study anything remotely related to education or Japan in his university days. I gave him what help I could and was not at all surprised when he didn’t get an interview.

Not long after this, I’m planning my trip home for Christmas 2014. (Guy) begins to message me asking when I’ll be free during my visit. I say that I have many people to see in Kansas and in Michigan, so I probably won’t have time to see him (a gentle way of saying that he’s not high enough on my priority list to get time with me). He then continues on, he wants to know the dates I’ll be home, when I’ll be visiting Kalamazoo, when I’ll be in my hometown, etc. He’s REALLY pushing to see me. Finally, I just lose it and send him a very strongly worded message about how I’m not interested in him, how I’ve said no multiple times, and that will never change. I then blocked him on every social media outlet we were connected on.

When I’m actually home for Christmas 2014, he calls my US phone on several occasions to try to reach me. His number was still saved so I ignored it each time. At the end of this trip I was finally able to permanently deactivate that phone so he couldn’t contact me anymore.

Move ahead to some time in 2015--he makes a new Facebook account and tries to add me. I immediately block him and report the account to Facebook for harassment. Of course Facebook does absolutely nothing. I tell mutual friends who are connected to him to keep an eye on him and let me know if he posts anything creepy related to me or Japan.

In late 2015/early 2016 my best bro tips me off to the fact that (Guy) is still trying to apply to be an ALT in Japan. I freak out and contact my inner circle of friends in Japan and let them know the story, and ask them if they would have my back if this guy ever showed up. Most of my friends thought I was overreacting and just told me some BS things to calm me down. I could feel how annoyed they were with me, and I was frustrated that they didn’t seem to take my worries seriously.

Now this. This photo. A screenshot from a few weeks ago, when I looked at my phone for the first time that morning and saw (Guy)’s name there. Shocked didn’t even begin to cover it. Before I blocked both accounts, I looked at his Facebook page to see that he is STILL attempting to apply as an ALT, with a caption “I will apply every year if I have to!”

I’m at a loss of what to do. This has been going on for NINE YEARS. No one seems to take me seriously when I express how scared and worried I am. Everyone assumes “oh there’s an ocean in the way and he can’t possibly get accepted to Japan anyway.” But what if he does? He’s not giving up on this. I have nightmares sometimes about meeting him at an ALT welcome event in my region, and in the dreams I just always freeze. I don’t know what to do.

Saying “no” didn’t work. Going across the world didn’t work. Will this even stop when I’m married? Is marking myself as the “territory” of another man the only way to stop (Guy) from pursuing me? Or will he wait around in the shadows, hoping that my relationships go sour so he can spring in the next day again?

I have so much good going for me in my life in Japan, I don’t want it to be sullied by this worry anymore. There’s seemingly nothing I can do because he’s not physically stalking me, and online forums only tell me to “go talk to the person.” I can’t go the JET office or any other ALT companies and tell them not to let someone into the country. I’m powerless to stop him from finding me if he gets to Japan.

By posting this, all I want is for my fears to be warranted. I want someone to take me seriously. I know there’s probably no way for me to wave a magic wand and make this all go away, but on days when I’m worried or when I have another new Facebook account of his staring me in the face, I just want someone to wrap their arms around me and tell me that I’m okay. Tell me that I’m not alone in this. Just offer me a hug and a shoulder and a place to take refuge. That’s all I want, and all I need <3

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jumpsitehq · 6 years

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100+ [REALLY] Cool Funny Quotes That Will Make You Laugh

Looking for a quick laugh at the end of a stressful day? A few short but funny quotes will definitely tickle your funny bone and beat away your blues. We’ve compiled a list of 100+ really hilarious quotes that you can send to anyone you know. We also have a great collection of Good Morning Wishes.

Really Cool Funny Quotes

1. “You are 100% unique and special – just like everyone else I know.” 2. “You’ll never get out of life alive, so don’t take it too seriously.” 3. “A day without sunshine is no different than the night.” 4. “What makes a successful woman? A woman that can spend more money than a successful man makes.” 5. “Make sure you know your facts so that you can distort them later.” 6. “You wouldn’t sit for a month if you could kick the person responsible for your troubles in the pants.” 7. “I might be a drunk, but when I am sober, you’ll still be ugly.” 8. “There’s no fun in agreement; it simply kills the chatter.” 9. “I’m on my way – although I don’t know where I am going.” 10. “Why is a woman’s mind cleaner than a man’s? She changes it often.” 11. “Who’s the best person to borrow money from? A pessimist. They won’t expect it back anyway.” 12. “The right speech is like a skirt: short enough to create interest and long enough to cover the areas that matter.” 13. “Coincidence is God’s disguise.” 14. “Einstein said there is a difference between genius and stupidity – genius has limits.” 15. “Education is the only thing that interferes with learning.” 16. “I want to live poor, but with a lot of money in the bank.” 17. “Why paint pictures that make sense when the world is in disarray?” 18. “Money doesn’t make you happy. I was happy when I had $80, and I am happy having $90.” 19. “I have my own opinions, but don’t agree on them, or they may change.” 20. “Old people always poke you at weddings and say “you’re next.” When I go to a funeral, I am going to poke them and say “you’re next.”

21. “The worst place to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.” 22. “Name the presidents? Don’t they have their own names?” 23. “I am not me. I am drunk.” 24. “I’m selling a parachute. It’s been used once and never been opened; there’s a small stain.” 25. “How many people work here? Only about ½ of them.” 26. “I refuse to answer any question I don’t know the answer to.” 27. “Temptation is the only thing I can’t resist.” 28. “Money is the key to happiness. Worst case scenario, if you have enough money, you can buy the key.” 29. “Everyone should accept who they are. Except you. You’re crazy.” 30. “The worst two minutes of my life were when I tried to be normal.” 31. “May your Monday be short, and your coffee be strong.” 32. “There will come a day when young people make fun of the old you.” 33. ““Just kidding” is the one lie I keep telling that all of these fools keep believing.” 34. ““Nothing is impossible.” Well, I do a great damn job of doing nothing most of the day – and I get paid to do it.” 35. “I was about to have a battle of wits with you, but it’s not right to have a battle with an unarmed man.” 36. “Procrastinate is a game, and I am a “pro” at it.” 37. “This will be known as the era when smartphones were created and started the race of the human zombies.” 38. “There are two things that I see every day: stupid people and stupid people on smartphones.” 39. “It’s all fun and games until the cops are called. Now, it’s a game of hide and seek with, hopefully, no winner.” 40. “Killing people is wrong, but we kill people that have killed other people because killing bad people is accepted.”

41. “I think it’s time I go take a hot shower. It is just like a normal shower until I get in it.” 42. “Math has completely taken over my life. Here I am, trying to make more money, lose more weight, divide my time while multiplying it, and I am completely lost half of the time.” 43. “If the world didn’t suck so much, we would float off into outer space.” 44. “There are three times when you can’t hold a person to their word: when they’re drunk, when they’re running for office, and when they’re in love.” 45. “Everyone thinks that no one in the world thinks that they’re important until they stop paying their bills.” 46. “It’s easy to admire the patience of the driver behind you, but impossible to admire the patience of the driver ahead of you – step on the gas already.” 47. “How can anyone say that they’re perfect when we all have a crack in our ass?” 48. “Everyone says that they want to save enough money to live comfortably for the rest of their lives. I have enough money to life comfortably – until the end of the week at least.” 49. “Every morning that you wake up, you want to make the devil say “oh crap, she is awake.”” 50. “They always say that silence is golden, but I found out that duct tape is silver and it seems to work just as well.” 51. “I would pay attention if I wasn’t so broke.” 52. “When you think about it, friendship is kind of like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but you’ll be the only one that can truly feel it.” 53. “You will find a lot of people who are willing to help you move for a slice of pizza, but only your best friend will help you move a dead body.” 54. “The only one that will lay your life down for the country is yourself – and your local politician.” 55. “In business, tomorrow is always the busiest day of the week.” 56. “There is only one person that you have to check your calendar for before scheduling an appointment – death.” 57. ““You’re one in a million.” Big deal! There are still 6,000 other people in the world that are just like you.” 58. “Alarm clocks only ensure one thing: that you wake up in the morning having a heart attack.” 59. “I would rather try to smell the number 9 than try to understand what you’re saying.” 60. “Want to know the truth about parents? Parents hire babysitters that are trying to act like adults, while the adults go out and try to act like a bunch of teenagers. It’s a never-ending cycle of trying to be younger and older.”

61. “I got the best compliment today. I walked out to my car and found a note from someone that says “Parking fine.” They must have really admired my parking job.” 62. “Everyone says that I lack ambition, but I did a few researchers to get that information.” 63. “Home Alone is the best movie to watch backwards. You’re shown a story of two men that are helped by a young kid that put out traps before he cleans them up and gets yelled at by his parents.” 64. “Don’t you miss the old days when you liked someone and all you had to do was chase them on the playground?” 65. “I never get into fights with ugly people – they have nothing to lose.” 66. “You can push a person to do anything – but make it through a door that says “pull.”” 67. “I am a writer, and the hardest part of the day is not getting distracted by the Internet. The other 1% is all about inspiration.” 68. “It’s an enigma. You see only happy singles when you’re dating and happy couples when you’re single.” 69. “I’m not fat. Nature is just saying that I am so good, there should be more of me.” 70. “Sarcasm is a natural defense mechanism against stupidity.” 71. “Being stupid in love means you’ve fallen so head over heels that you got brain damage.” 72. “What’s the one thing every successful student has? A Facebook that is deactivated.” 73. “Facebook isn’t a diary where you only post your life’s disappointments and failures.” 74. “Falling on your face is good for you as long as you keep going forward.” 75. “Stress can only come from three things: family, money and family with no money.” 76. “Love is kind of like a fart; if you have to force your love, it’s probably crap.” 77. “Staying positive is easy when all you keep doing is falling on your face.” 78. “Relationships that don’t end well all start the same way: he is so different. But they always end with: “he is just like the rest.”” 79. “There is no difference between a bully at school and upper level management at work.” 80. “The only good women that exist are all already taken.”

81. “You never want to argue with a fool because he will be doing the same thing.” 82. “Thank God you’re not intelligent. At least you never have to act.” 83. “Everyone calls it schizophrenia. I just think of it as having my own social network with the people that matter most to me.” 84. “The large print has a way of giving you everything you could possibly want, while the small print has a way of taking it all away.” 85. “The moment that scientists find the center of the universe, there will be a lot of people that are upset that they’re not in it.” 86. “I have left my past behind me. P.S. If I owe you money, I have already moved on.” 87. “Fools are the only people that seems to live forever. They just don’t understand dying.” 88. “Love is the hourglass that fills up, and quickly pours out taking all of a man’s money.” 89. “Financially, I am not ready for Christmas. But I am ready for all the presents I will get.” 90. “Men have a life that is amazing. First, we believe in Santa Claus, then we don’t believe in Santa Claus, and then when we have kids, we are Santa Claus.” 91. “The best way to explain intelligence is to sit down and point out all of the idiots.” 92. “The beautiful women that play hard to get are the same ones who pray the hardest to get a husband.” 93. “Rich men aren’t stupid; they are the only ones that will get another man to spend their minutes on them.” 94. “Bank accounts are the true evidence of how badly I can manage my finances.” 95. “There are many ways to argue with a woman, but none of them work for me.” 96. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder – until they say something stupid, and you have to punch them in the eye.” 97. “Best friends are the only people that cheer you on when you’re angry and try to get you to punch someone else in the face.” 98. “Having two children made me realize that I need to hire a referee.” 99. “Being a women is a tough job; we always have to deal with men.” 100. “I have lost a lot of things in life, but the one thing I miss the most is my mind.”

101. “My parents would be so proud of me if Facebook and Twitter were all school subjects.” 102. “Everyone says life is short, but who took the measurements?” 103. “The saying goes, “no matter how hot she is, there is someone tired of dealing with her sh**.”” 104. “You become very good at fractions when you grow up with siblings.” 105. “I may be the oddest person among a group, but I am the gold tooth that shines the most.” 106. “Women are just like telephones. They love when you talk to them and hold them, but if you press the wrong buttons, you’ll be disconnected.” 107. “I would pray for strength, but I am too afraid I will throw you out of the window.” 108. “You know the way I look at chocolate cake? That is how I want people to look at me.” 109. “Geniuses can’t answer the questions of a stupid person.” 110. “You may not like my sarcasm, but I don’t like your stupidity.” 111. “People that know the least about you always think they know the most.” 112. “I am not single. I am in a long distance relationship with someone that lives in my future.” 113. “When life gives me lemons, I patiently wait for the person that has vodka to come along, so we can have a party.” 114. “You can be the smartest person in the world, but you’ll never be able to convince a stupid man that he’s stupid.” 115. “I am the best person in the world at keeping secrets. I will forget what you say two minutes from now.” 116. “Dating an ex is like failing a test that you already have the answers to.” 117. “There’s always a person that thinks you’re flirting with them when you’re just being nice.” 118. “There’s one advantage to exercising every day: you’ll die healthier.” 119. “You can keep rolling your eyes, so hopefully, you find a brain back there.” 120. “If you can’t find a problem, look in the mirror and stare it right in the face.” 121. “Women must get so tired with putting on two faces in the morning.” 122. “Sometimes, the other person is an idiot and doesn’t take the first step to forgiveness.” 123. “Laughter is the best medicine until they put you on medicine.” 124. “True friends are those that never judge another person while they’re alone.” 125. “Facebook is a game that everyone plays with a face of caring and compassion although they don’t really care.” 126. “Good friends are the friends that never let you make a stupid decision while you’re alone.” 127. “I will be there the moment karma hits you in the face – just in case it needs a little help.” 128. “Politicians have a way of promising the world while taking away every last penny you have.”

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roinish · 6 years

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Hi Everyone,I thought this would be a good place to tell you about my experience in wiping my facebook account completely and also deleting the account entirely.Now I am not here to tell you that you should or to argue with anyone about why. You will know if this choice is right for you, don't just do it because everyone else did because there is a lot of history there. I have actually been thinking about doing this for a long time and the reason I put it off for so long was that I still used Facebook to communicate with some of the lads who play in my band.I thought a bit of a guide and walk through of what I did would be helpful because wiping the account is anything but easy. There are a lot of little things that you need to do. The good news is a lot of this can be automated so lets begin. I am sure I could have sped it up further if I wrote some scripts but in this case I did not do so.I also know that you can just delete the account outright and Facebook says it will be gone forever after 14 days. But, to be fair I don't see any guarantee of that and I think a lot of other people like me might prefer to do it manually then close it. Again, up to you if you want to do this. Once you do this, this stuff is gone and it's gone forever!If you aren't sure then perhaps deactivate for a month and see if you can go without Facebook for a while.When I was doing this I did feel a bit sad because its a long walk down memory lane and I did feel a bit of doubt but I pushed through anyway because I knew I had my data and photos backed up.YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!Step 1Request an Archive and download all of your data. Once it's ready download it onto your computer or OneDrive, Google Drive and keep it safe. No point in losing all of your photos? Just remember this downloads "YOUR" data. It does not download all the photos that friends have taken and tagged you in. I'll get onto tagging later.Step 2First of all what I did was use a little program add on for Chrome called "Social Book Post Manager"Once this is installed you just have to go to your activity log and tell it to delete all of your activity from top to bottom. This will take a while, especially if you post a lot of stuff (which I did for about 2 out of 10 years). Now because there is so much you will likely find that stuff gets missed. So it's a good idea to run this again. AND DON'T FIDDLE with it while it's running. You basically want to clear the whole activity log down the left hand side. The Add-In will delete the basic data but it won't remove everything. Go into various sub categories. Use the utility as much as you can. It works on most of them. Also make sure you uncheck the "Review" box.Step 3Once you have used the utility you will have to get to the harder bit. This is basically going through the stuff people have tagged you in and removing the tag.NOW REMEMBER YOUR DATA DOES NOT INCLUDE PHOTOS AND CONTENT THAT OTHERS HAVE POSTED AND TAGGED YOU IN. You can't delete that stuff but you can remove the tag. If you want to download this stuff you will have to save it manually from your friends facebook account. There were lots of photos of me on stage posted by my band mates and I was tagged in them. I saved some of these manually. Go through and remove all the tags.Now I had some issues with some things being untagged so I sometimes had to click "Remove Tag" then select "This is annoying or not interesting" then click on remove the tag. Luckily there weren't many of these.This took me about 2-3 hours total. Remember use all the Activity log categories down the site. Things like "Posts your tagged in" "Other peoples posts to your timeline" "Photos your tagged in" Clear it all!!! Notes, videos you've watched, polls, search history. Wipe it CLEAAAAN!!Step 4Remove all app access to your facebook account. Any app like spotify or Nike+, basically anything you signed up using your facebook account with. You will need to strip this out of here. But before you do you might want to make sure you have a username and password to access it outside of facebook. You can achieve this by either signing up for a new account or doing password resets.Step 5Go into messenger and delete all your conversations, go into the Archive and delete all that from there. (There was a time when delete meant archive so they will probably be stuff in here too). I also went into Settings and "Ads" and deleted all the info they had collected on what I was into like video games, cats and music etc"Step 6Unfriend everyone. I know you're a little heartbreaker. Break all those friendships and finally I also went through and deleted all my other info (there wasn't much to be honest). Stuff like where I live, phone numbers, place I work etc which Facebook had picked up over the years.Step 7Delete your account. Go into settings and delete it (This takes 14 days). Just be aware that once it's gone, it's gone (apparently). Once you delete and it logs you out, don't log back in because it will ask you reactivate. So make sure you are signed out of everything, on your devices, desktops and browsers. Sign out of everything, then DELETE.Anyway I hope someone else finds this guide useful. If there is anything I may have missed out then let me know and I'll add it to the post.EDIT: Step numbering. via /r/LifeProTips

#IFTTT #reddit

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