Dan and Phil play Dream Daddy
MEET DILDDY LESTOWELL
I loved this video! I was dying of laughter in the first fifteen minutes and just had to make timestamps. Very very long under the cut.
0:00 Phil is wearing his rainbow zebra shirt! Being his best self.
0:03 Wow was that second “daddies” necessary Phil? (Yes, it was.)
0:42 “Cause you know Dan and Phil they like to have the raw naked-”- Dan
0:45 “Immersion”- Phil
0:46 “They just like to go in-”- Dan
0:47 “Are you saying we’re going to have to be blurring some things-”- Phil
0:48 “Bare. What?”- Dan (what?)
0:58 “Give me that Daddiest graphics.”- Phil
1:00 “Oh it’s like Yuri on Ice.”- Dan
1:10 Phil will be a long haired vampire in ten years. Yes, something to look forward to.
1:25 “Phil, don’t do your chin like that, you’re fine.”- Dan (damn fine)
2:07 “Is that your best dad voice?”- Dan
2:14 “Do you wanna be Dad?”- Phil (sass)
2:15 “Phil, everyone wants you to be Dad.”- Dan (the honest truth)
2:34 “Moving house? Oh my god!”- Dan (omg!)
2:45 “Coordinating the headband with the nails.”- Dan (noticing the important stuff)
2:46 “Definitely.”- Phil
2:53 Phil’s yawn, wtf was that? Sounds like a dog.
2:55 “Are you American now?”- Dan
2:56 “I don’t knowww.”- Phil (poor frustrated Phil)
3:03 “Build that Dad!”- in sync
3:30 “Dilddy! No?”- Phil (Dan’s face)
3:36 “Yeah sure. Let’s not think about that anymore Phil.”- Dan
4:04 “Thor. We just made Thor by accident.”- Phil (always with the Thor)
4:07 “Ah the bun hair.”- Dan
4:08 “Man bun.”- Phil
4:09 “That’s very like modern dad aesthetic.”- Dan
4:12 “That’s quite Dil-y”- Phil
4:13 “That’s the most Dil-esque, I think.”- Dan
4:19 “Heart eyes.”- Phil
4:20 “SENPAI!!!”- Dan
4:30 “Can you just have heart eyes the entire game?”- Dan (are you asking for permission Dan?)
4:31 “The whole time.”- Phil
4:32 “Is that just going to ruin the game?”- Phil (no.)
4:33 “Would that be slightly distracting?”- Dan (well, yes.)
4:58 “Noman Rose.”- Phil (has a bit of a Roman nose)
5:10 They love the lips, sassy mouths
5:39 “He banged it on some kind of exercise equipment.”- Phil
5:40 “Wrestling another dad for territory.”- Dan (sure)
5:45 “Yes!”- Phil is excited by facial hair options (and I’m excited for him)
5:50 “More people should have black hair and blonde beards.”- justifying your ginger eyebrows Phil?
5:51 Dan has to think a second before agreeing
5:55 Hunger Games aesthetic, okay.
6:00 “I asked you yesterday if you’d grow a full beard. If you wanted to. Like what’s your answer to that question?”- Phil (I’m going to cry.)
6:04 “What in like twenty years?”- Dan
6:05 “Yeah.”- Phil
6:05 “Yeah, sure. I’ll give it a crack.”- Dan
6:06 “Do you think you’ll ever have a full beard?”- Phil
6:09 “Ever?”- D
6:10 “Ever.”- P
6:10 “Yeah, maybe in like ten years when I finish going through puberty.”- Dan
6:13 “I kinda wanna try.”- Phil wants to try a beard, people! And it might be a different color than his fringe. I see.
6:15 “This is the best part!”- Phil on clothing
6:19 “Can’t you just like have nothing?”- Phil (for underroos apparently)
6:22 “Captain America! Yes!”- Phil (nice six pointed star)
6:25 “Egg nips. I mean totally, I can see that.”- Dan
6:31 Phil saying “Daddy Dil” kills me
6:35 “Cats! With a suit jacket.”- Phil (we have a winner)
6:43 I agree with Dan about that pattern, it reminds me of party centers, roller rinks and tour busses. Phil with the Saved by the Bell reference.
7:00 “Goals. As the kids would say.”- Dan
7:26 “Be that dad. The dad you always dreamed to be.”- Dan
7:28 “Now do we get to date some dads?”- Phil Lester asking the important questions.
7:58 Phil’s second child syndrome
8:13 “No mum’s must exist in this universe!”- Dan (okay Dan, interesting justification)
8:35 “I was just given a bin bag and some sticky stars to say I was a ‘wizard’. Yeah.”- Phil (dang that’s cheap, Lesters)
8:43 “Princess Dragon!”- in sync
8:45 Dan would watch a scaley fairytale movie
9:05 “I wish I had a horse phase.”- Dan (I’m glad I did)
9:09 “Or a Horse Prince phase.”- Phil (he’s not over it)
9:11 “Oh we all had that.”- Dan
9:20 “Why aren’t we going to McFridayz?”- Phil
9:50 Adoption +1
10:00 Kangaroo existential crisis
10:19 “Hit me.”- Dan
10:25 “He knows what to do.”- Dan (getting really into it)
10:30 “Yeah. Then what?”- squeaky over dramatic Dan
10:35 “And then he ran away with a kangaroo.”- Phil (there are two types of people in this world)
10:44 “Just look him up on Facebook! Or did he die?”- Phil
11:02 “The old house!”- fake crying Dan
11:05 Hawaiian backstories, driving distraction
11:15 Hydration: “I can get behind this.”- Dan
11:22 Phil, waving your hands in the air where Dan sneezes is not going to keep the germs away. Maybe if you both actually covered.
11:33 Everyone does bicep curls in this Daddy themed universe
12:12 Dil Howlter house without the owl slide is no Dil Howlter house at all.
12:44 “Dogs!”- Phil
12:48 “CLICK!”- Dan
12:55 Dog to person ratio should be the highest thing on the agenda for any neighborhood
13:11 “Side quest!”- Dan
13:11 “Dog quest!”- Phil
13:12 “Dog time! I’m here for some cute drawn dogs.”- Dan
13:16 Woofing song to the tune of the Katamari theme!
13:27 “What is this idyllic pastel utopia that they’re living in right now? Honestly.”- Dan
13:30 “Where’s the diseased pigeons?”- Phil (London summarized by Phil)
13:47 “DOGS! (toddlers) NOT INTERESTED! (dogs) INTERESTED!”- Dan
13:52 Panting puppies D&P
14:05 “A corgi! Of all the dogs!”- Phil (this is the only reason Phil agreed to play this game)
14:14 “Delet this doggo.”- Dan
14:20 Second “Bork!”
14:26 “Oh god this is the cutest dog. Can we just do dog adoption simulator instead?”- Phil (I’m sure you could)
14:30 “Pet the dog!”- Phil
14:58 “Woah! Irish father of my children!”- Dan
15:13 Gruff and slightly offensive leprechaun
15:18 Puppy role play ;)
15:25 Phil saw the aubergines come out.
15:35 Phil apologizes for “Dilddy”
16:05 Dan loves the freckle representation.
16:22 “Oh my god it’s a Dad Child Proud Of Brag Off”- Dan (very Undertale)
17:33 “Bam. Amazing.”- Dan, “Slapped.”- Phil
19:55 “I’m torn though, cause he has a corgi.”- Phil
19:57 “He has a corgi, but-”- Dan
19:58 “Can we not just date him to hang out with the corgi?”- Phil
20:01 “Can we date him, adopt the corgi and then break up with him?”- Dan
20:04 “Yes!”- Phil (a good plan)
20:33 “I mean let’s just get our own corgi. Let’s adopt a corgi.”- Dan (a better plan)
21:07 Dan would read horse fan-fiction.
21:36 Chocolate coffee beans btw
22:11 “*Sigh* Why would people sit next to you, they always do that though don’t they?”- Dan
22:26 "Am I being helpful or am I cluttering up everyone’s life?“- Dan
22:44 "Oh my god!”- Dan
22:45 “Another Dad.”- Phil
22:46 “With the ta- the glasses, the hair, the piercing.”- Dan (tattoos)
22:49 “Good layering. On the outfit.”- Phil
22:51 “Definitely.”- Dan
23:00 Dan doesn’t like the “too cool” vibe.
23:13 Husky voice ;)
23:38 Dan would not be able to hold a conversation with this guy in real life. Probably because he sounds too much like himself.
23:48 Iced Tegan and Sara (yay!)
23:02 Phil got the pun!
24:49 Couches (Starbucks sofa)
24:50 “Okay Amanda, wow. Life isn’t all about listening to cool music. It’s about enjoying the music that you like.”- Dan
25:00 Good lumbar support is important. It’s comfier than their couch. *giggles*
25:48 “Okay I’m about this.”- Dan (feeding kink)
25:50 “He’s got food!”- Phil
25:53 “Yes. Tick that box.”- Phil
27:08 Phil likes Mat’s awkwardness
27:10 Dan is on the fence: “I don’t know how to feel. Runs a coffee shop, bit of a hipster, is socially awkward, gives you banana bread. I think it’s looking mostly good.”
27:27 “Ohhhh.”- in sync (using 'baby’ in flirting)
28:00 “Wow. Are we adults? Cause we just moved recently.”- Yes Dan, you are adults.
28:08 “Do I smell bad?”- Phil
28:09 “Noo.”- Dan with a quick sniff, barely leaning in, he clearly already knew the answer.
28:16 They agree that the dark and mysterious stranger is the most intriguing part of the story. Stupid look at camera.
28:30 Acknowledging that they still have boxes
28:42 Pink duck, succulents and XBox 360 “Nice”- Phil
28:56 “Get the hell out of my life!”- Dan
29:00 “He’s too perfect already.”- Phil
29:08 “Robot. Robot. Robot.”- Phil
29:36 “Guffaw.”- Dan
30:13 Yeah, just move again guys!
30:28 Phil feels bad for kangaroo jokes earlier.
31:11 Phil likes the do over, time flipping, reset thing.
31:33 Louise story mention.
32:18 “What is that wink?”- Dan
32:30 “All of these daddies are mixed bags.”- Dan desk slamming returns
32:40 “He’s a bloody angel. He’s an angel.”- Dan
32:42 “He’s got a dark secret.”- Phil
32:44 “But also angels are terrible. Stop feeling bad by comparing yourself to an angel.”- Dan
32:48 “Dark secret.”- Phil
33:07 “Plot twizzle.”- Dan
33:45 “They are definitely possessed. I told you, dark secret.”- Phil
34:05 “Christie, Christian and Chris. Wow.”- Dan
34:08 “Evil.”- Phil
34:09 “Definitely.”- Dan
34:28 Exorcist
34:34 “Time for the nappy ding dong.”- Dan
35:01 “Bro”- Dan "Bro"- Phil
35:20 That look
35:22 “Old college roommate.”- Phil
35:23 “Just sayin.”- Dan
35:35 “River. Oh my god.”- Dan (good name)
35:42 Nice baby gurgling Dan
35:51 “Survived that hazing together.”- Dan
36:00 Phil enjoying the matching eyebrows
36:06 “Maybe they got that scar together, doing something, as roommates.”- Dan
36:30 “Copacabana.”- Dan
36:50 “Clearly we didn’t have the American college experience. We did the Smirnoff Slam.”- Dan
37:05 Jogging with baby imitation
37:12 “Wow. Dilddy is just every person probably on the internet and YouTube, in the community watching this.”- Dan
37:25 “Wow. So relatable.”- Dan (shush Dan, #relatable is your schtick)
37:30 “How is he so ripped if he never jogs though?”- Phil (umm you selected that body type and said he works out.)
37:37 “Bro brunch.”- Phil, “A bro brunch?!”- Dan
“Why do we never have bro brunches?”- Dan, “I don’t know”-Phil
“What the hell is a bro brunch?”- Dan, “I don’t know.”- Phil
37:52 “Jog on, Craig.”- Phil, “Jog on, Craig? Jesus.”- Dan
38:18 “I mean, there’s like, stuff in that, isn’t there.”- Yes Dan, they’re tomatoes.
41:01 “The blonde guy.”- Phil
41:10 Phil likes coffee shop guy. Gee I wonder why. Dan is unsure, too cool.
41:30 Dan likes the blonde: confidence, wants to make you happy, “that’s who Dilddy needs in his life, at this important time.” (Dear god Dan can you not?)
Phil still thinks he’s a robot with satanic children. Yep.
41:51 Gee Phil you don’t seem into it. (probably just tired, maybe headache)
42:08 “Thumb it”, tickle, etc.
42:45 “Get a dog.”- Dan
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