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dunkshotdreaming · 6 years

Text

Demon Hunter

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None

Word count: 5k (oneshot)

Synopsis: Maybe Ken’s been watching just a little too much anime.. maybe.

(A/N): Reposting this as a tester. I want to see if I can fix the gif issue I’ve been having with my drafts/posts lately💀 Side note, I’m not currently on my desktop tumblr so I’ll try to add the Read More option when I wake up and turn on my laptop, sorry for any inconveniences!

🎀

I was just at home, laying on my plush sofa when I noticed my phone light up. The notification was from none other than my boyfriend, Ken, and I couldn’t help the grin that came upon my face.

“Hello?” I answered the call.

“Baby! I miss you, can I come over? I’ll buy food~,” he chirped.

“Yes Ken, of course,” I chuckled, “you’re always welcome. I was just watching reruns anyway.”

After a bit of more mushy conversation, I left my spot on the couch to tidy up the house a little before his arrival. He’d driven over soon enough, greeting me with a bear hug the second I managed to open the door, kissing all over my face as I dragged him inside just enough to shut the door behind him. Something stood out to me however, it was his jacket.

“Babe, uh, not sure how to tell you this.. but I think you bought the wrong size,” I joked.

“What, the hoodie?” Ken asked as he pointed to the red, front zip hoodie he was indeed wearing.

“It looks almost twice your size, why didn’t you just get one that fits?” I tugged on the white strings of the hood playfully. “Or did you just want a baggy sweater?”

“Actually,” he drags out the word as he slowly unzips and removes the sweater, “it’s for you.” Eyeing him with a curiously raised brow, I silently urged him to continue. “You know how you’ve been obsessing over InuYasha recently, sweetheart?”

“Of course love, why?” I have a good idea why, but I’d love to hear his explanation for this. So I kept baiting him to speak up.

“When we were watching the show last time, InuYasha gave Kagome his robe to protect her,” Ken relayed.

“So is this supposed to be the Robe of the Fire Rat?” I had to contain a giggle that was dying to burst.

“Kinda,” Ken gave me a lopsided grin, paired with his adorable eye smile. “You seemed to find it cute, so I wanted to recreate it.. like our own little insider.” His voice trailed off as suddenly his face drops.

“Ken, what is it?” I worriedly tug at his shirt. He looks down at me solemnly, placing the soft jacket over my shoulders and hugging me close. “Honey, you’re scaring the life out of me.. what’s wrong?” I crane my neck to look up at him as he smooths a hand over my hair.

Leaning down by my ear he whispers, “I’ll protect you, don’t worry.” I proceeded to freak out, thinking of what to do if there was a killer, or a robber in my house, or if there was a rapist on the loose or… When I realized what Ken was doing, it dawned on me that I couldn’t have been farther from the truth. This dork goes up to the closet in the hallway, and with a deadpan expression, pulls out of my old toy swords won at some arcade, warning me to stay behind him for safety.

Before I can begin to question his logic however, it all comes to light fairly quickly. “Hah, puny demon, you’re no match for me! What is it you want, the jewel shards? Come at me, then! Tessaiga!” And with that he unsheathes the sword.. at my yipping little Pomeranian, barking along excitedly for playtime. This grown, nearly six foot man, was pretending a puppy was a demon, fighting it to protect me, sweater and all.

After the shock had worn off from thinking there was any real danger, I watched my goofball of a boyfriend and fluff of a pup chase each other around the living room, smiling at their antics. It wasn’t long before I’d joined in as well, with my arms finally through the huge jacket sleeves, so it wouldn’t fall off my now dwarfed form. It was velvety soft, though perhaps a bit thick, and smelled of what I can only describe as Ken. His favorite cologne and something sweet, leading me to think he was probably eating candy earlier, which could partially be the cause for his extra hyper-ness today.

Somewhere along our silly chase, I nearly trip over myself, and he manages to catch me, tossing me over his shoulder with a hearty laugh. My poor dog now exhausted and laying in his bed, Ken carries me back to the couch, positioning himself under me so we could cuddle.

“You’re too cute for words, Ken Lee,” I mumble contentedly into his chest.

“But you still give me a run for my money, cutie pie.” I blushed at his words of endearment.

“Quick question. If you wanted to give me the sweater, why’d you wear it on your way over?”

“Because I wanted it to smell like me when I handed it over,” Ken paused, “ok that and I wanted to do the whole dramatic demon fighting stunt I pulled,” he confessed sheepishly.

“Dork,” I muttered with a grin plastered to my face, knowing he could feel it rather than see it as I was still against his shirt, leaning up to place a kiss on his lips.

“No hard feelings?” I felt him mumble against my lips.

“None whatsoever, my love. In fact, I’m beyond grateful you went through all this trouble.”

“It’s no trouble if it’s for you, my darling.” He grabbed my hand and kissed it tenderly, making my heart melt knowing Ken truthfully meant his words.

I playfully shoved his shoulder once he’d let go, resting my face in the crook of his neck, feeling elated. “Whatta day, I got my own Robe and you managed to unsheathe Tessaiga,” I joked.

“Does that make me your half demon?” He pulled back just to wink cheesily.

“Sure thing, as long as I’m your Kagome,” I winked back.

“But what if I liked Kikyo,” Ken teased, earning a glare before he laughed maniacally and apologized, hugging me tighter.

“Don’t think I forgot, you promised you’d buy food,” I pouted cutely, “how about we order Japanese?”

Ken snorted at my lame choice and pinched my nose before muttering “weeb” and kissing the tip. I yawned loudly, catching us both off guard. “How about we order after we take a nap?” Ken chuckled, asking if I’d stayed up late last night, to which I nodded. Busted, I had lost track of time because I ended up on the weird side of YouTube. That and reading click-bait articles, which I really should stop falling for.

With his beautiful, melodic voice, Ken sang me a lullaby, rubbing my back gently meanwhile. A soft tune and loving touch, sleep called out to me irresistibly. Engulfed by his scent and rhythmic heartbeat, I gave into the pull, and our demon slaying journey to Feudal Japan was put on hold. After all, even half demons need their beauty sleep.

🎀

(A/N): I really hope you all liked it, and as I’ve probably mentioned before, InuYasha quite literally showed me a whole new world. Bc withhout it I wouldn’t be the kpop/anime nerd I am today lmao

Wishing you all an amazing day~ Oh, and if you noticed any typos, feel free to point them out and I’ll fix em asap!

♥ Best wishes, as always. xoxo, Berry 🍓

#repost #testing testing #ken lee demon hunter #demon hunter #lee jaehwan #vixx #vixx scenarios #vixx fanfics #vixx x reader #ken #vixx ken #ken x reader #gender neutral self insert #reader insert #dunkshotdreaming

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elsaclack · 6 years

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This is really random but I saw a fic of yours about Amy being sick (I think the prompt was "Amy yells at the Vulture") but I can't find the full piece anywhere. Is it on AO3 anywhere? I love your writing and I completely understand if you just didn't want it out anymore. Just thought I'd ask! :)

i thought it was but i just went and searched my entire work history (including all 70+ chapters of those god-forsaken oneshot collections) and i couldn’t find it anywhere!! i guess i forgot to cross-post it back when i first wrote it, and it got lost when i deleted the original elsaclack. but i just scoured my docs list and found it buried in a random folder so i’ll repost it here and add it to the newest one-shot collection on ao3 :)

fun fact: this was written almost exactly 2 years ago!!! meaning that my writing skills have developed considerably since i actually wrote this. aka please don’t judge me if this seems like a sudden regression haha

also i wanna tag @phil-the-stone-art bc we actually developed the concept of The List together so she’s at least 35% responsible for this fic lmao

under the cut!

Amy Santiago does not get sick, thank you very much. She prides herself on her meticulous nightly hygienic rituals, on the cabinet full of multivitamins and minerals she takes on a daily basis in her bathroom, on the rigorous workout routine and diet she keeps herself on each week to maintain perfect health. She lives her life by a very tight plan (laid out in checklists and carefully organized in color-coded binders) that simply does not afford her any extra time to be sick.

Which is why, when she wakes up one Tuesday morning with a head stuffed full of cotton and violent shivers rolling down her spine, she gets up to start her usual routine in spite of the fact that she feels like she hasn’t actually slept in three weeks. Jake’s still snoring on the other side of the bed, another hour away from getting up to haphazardly dress in whatever flannel he can find lying on her bedroom floor that doesn’t smell too dirty, and he doesn’t even stir at the sound of her shuffling footsteps or running nose.

She drags herself into the bathroom, shuts the door, and flicks the lights on. Her reflection honestly makes her jump back an inch or two; she’s never seen her skin quite so pale, or bruises beneath her eyes quite so dark, or her lips quite so visibly dry and cracked. She reaches out to grip the edges of her sink and realizes that her arms and hands are trembling, and when she leans a bit more weight onto them she notes that her knees are quaking beneath her.

All in all, not a great start to the day.

She presses on, though, ignoring her running nose and congested head and general exhaustion. The shower helps a little, but not much.

When she shuts the water off, she hears Jake moving around in her bedroom, and her heart skips a beat. She hadn’t even realized she’d been in the shower that long. “Jake?” She calls as she wraps a towel around herself. Her voice is coarse and rough.

“Hey,” he knocks lightly at the door. “You okay?”

“Yeah - yeah, could you, um…there’s a binder out on the dining room table, should say something on the cover about that case I was working on last night -” she clears her throat and winces at the sharp pain that responds “- could you grab it and put it in my bag?”

“Sure,” he’s quiet for a moment and Amy’s left to gently rub at her temples with the heels of her hands. “Are you sure you’re okay? You sound awful.”

“I’m…I’m fine.”

But she’s not. Her knees are still quaking and vertigo has suddenly set in and she’s swaying, reaching out to grab the tiled edge of her shower. Her hand slips against the wet surface and she falls forward, shoulder banging painfully into the tiles.

The door swings open and Jake bursts inside in a panic. “Ames? Oh my God!” She suddenly realizes that she’d sunk down to a crouching position upon falling. He kneels next to her, gently pulling her away from the shower and letting her lean heavily into him. Her head falls against his shoulder, forehead pressed to the crook of his neck, and she hears him tut. “You’re burning up, babe,” he says quietly.

“I’m fine,” her voice fails half-way through and she ends up finishing in an unconvincing whisper.

“You’re not going to work today,” he tells her.

“But -”

“You almost fainted just now, Amy. You’re staying home sick today.”

She tries to argue but he pulls her up off the ground, keeping his touch firm and steady should gravity leave her again, and her voice completely dies on the way out of the bathroom. He lets her whisper weak arguments as he steers her gently toward the bed, humming and nodding along as he pulls fresh sweatpants up her legs and eases one of his academy shirts over her head. He pushes back on her good shoulder with just enough force that she lays down and pulls the comforter up to her chin. Her eyelids flutter closed when he presses a kiss against her forehead.

“I’ll tell Captain Holt where you are,” he says quietly. His hand finds hers against the mattress, fingers twisting through hers. “Get some sleep, okay?”

She’s asleep before he even gets out the front door.

A few hours later she’s roused by the sound of her phone vibrating on her bedside table. Sunlight streams in through her window and she squints, disoriented, fumbling around with semi-numb fingers for her phone.

From: Jake PeraltaHow u feelin? Miss u at work. Charles says he’ll bring u goat soup later lol

It hurts to even swallow, and Amy has to work really hard to keep from whining at the splitting headache igniting behind her right eye.

To: Jake PeraltaFeel like garbage. I haev a headache. Im afraid to get out of bed for meds. Miss u too

She waits five minutes for him to respond, and when her phone remains motionless, she closes her eyes and lets it fall against her chest.

Precisely twenty minutes after that, she hears her front door open. It closes again and she hears footsteps crossing her living room and it only just hits her that someone is in her apartment when those footsteps cross the threshold of her bedroom.

“Hey, hey, don’t get out of bed,” Jake says soothingly. Amy falls back against her pillow from her struggling half-sitting up position as Jake drops a plastic grocery bag at the foot of her bed and perches on the edge of the mattress beside her. He replaces her phone back on her bedside table with one hand and smooths his other palm over her forehead (and she only just then realizes that she’s sweating) and grimaces. “You’re still burning up,” he says, running his fingers through her hair just above her forehead.

“I’m fine,” she whispers, and the words slip out between two wet coughs.

He frowns and gently scratches his short nails against her scalp. “I brought Advil,” he says, casting an absent glance over his shoulder at the bag he brought in, “and stuff to make soup. It’s the recipe for Nana’s matzoh ball soup.” She raises her eyebrows beneath his palm and he grins down at her. “Don’t tell Charles, but it’s literally the best soup you’ll ever have and it’ll cure your dumb cold in twenty minutes or less.”

“Promise?”

He leans down and pecks a kiss against her forehead. “Promise,” he says when he leans away. “I’m gonna go make some and bring it in here and you’ll be back on your feet before the end of the day. Peralta Guarantee.” He winks.

She sinks down into the mattress as much as she can when he stands up, opening her eyes only when he comes back in with two Advil tablets and a glass half-full of water. Within minutes she begins hearing pots and pans knock around in her kitchen, and through her cloudy mind she registers that her stomach is rumbling in irritation.

“Alright,” he announces from her doorway. Her eyes split open and he’s carefully balancing the soup bowl on top of her dresser. “I’ll help you sit up, don’t move.”

He pulls her up with one hand and waits until she’s sitting up steadily before hurriedly stacking her pillows up behind her. She breathes a sigh of relief when she leans back, not realizing just how much of a strain sitting up is until that moment. He hurries back to where the soup is still steaming and carefully brings it over to her, the tip of his tongue appearing at the corner of his mouth for how hard he has to concentrate on not spilling any.

He nestles it in her lap, and she smiles, because he looks so proud of himself and he’s really so adorable.

Jake stays with her until she finishes the whole bowl and then he takes her dishes from her and quickly rinses them out in her sink.

“I’ll be back after work to check on you and to finish cleaning that, okay?” He calls from her doorway.

She hums hoarsely and fades out of consciousness.

An hour later, Amy wakes up feeling half-human. Her head and throat still hurt and she still can’t breathe out of her nose, but her brain doesn’t feel quite so fried and her limbs don’t feel quite so weak anymore.

Jake was right - the soup really did help.

Not as much as Nyquil would, but…still.

She kicks the comforter off and moves to sit up, and her phone suddenly falls into her lap from her chest. She pauses, staring at it, trying to remember when it ended up back there. She has no new calls or texts, but when she unlocks the screen, there’s a new note pulled up.

Things i want t odo to jake in bed

Amy feels flames engulf her face that have absolutely nothing to do with her fever. The list has twelve items on it, each one raunchier and riddled with more spelling errors than the last, and by the time she gets to the end of the note she’s covering her face in embarrassment. She’s got just the vaguest memory of typing it (and it’s really more of a dream of a memory than anything else), but none of it will solidify into more than just faint snapshots in her head.

But the more she rereads it, the more heat begins building in her body - heat from the mental images, heat from the germs ravaging her body, heat from the thick comforter still draped over her legs.

She has got to go get some Nyquil.

Santiago Determination blazes through her as she drags herself out of bed, shoulders set and jaw clenched as she pulls one of Jake’s hoodies over her frame and slides her feet into her rarely-worn flip-flops. Part of her feels guilty, knowing that if Jake was the one home sick she’d insist on him texting her anything he needs so that he would stay in bed and recover faster, but she brushes it off as she grabs her purse.

What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, right?

She blames her scattered brain on the matzoh ball soup later. She blames her compromised detective skills and her lack of attention to detail and her general disorientation on the soup. Because under normal circumstances, no matter how sick she truly is, she would definitely have noticed the Vulture browsing the low aisles of the bodega around the corner from her house immediately upon walking through the front doors.

But as it is, she doesn’t, which means that he gets a visual on her before she’s even aware of being spotted.

She’s so busy perusing the medicine section toward the back that she doesn’t notice him stalking around the shelves, doesn’t feel him peeking around the Doctor Scholl’s cardboard display, doesn’t hear him mutter at a mother and daughter to get out of his way as he follows her ambling walk down the aisle. She isn’t aware of the danger until he’s basically on top of her.

“Yo, Santiago,” he says, his voice low and curdling. She winces and turns slowly, and he’s leaned against the shelves to her left, leering down at her. A handcart hangs between them; it’s full of at least thirty boxes of condoms, she realizes when she glances down. Her stomach shifts unpleasantly. “You look homeless.”

“Get out of the way,” she whispers hoarsely.

“Aw, what’s the matter? Peralta got you screaming so hard every night you lost your voice?”

Heat bursts through her cheeks and she glances back, meeting the scandalized look on that same mother’s face with an apologetic grimace. “Shut up.” She snaps as fiercely as she can.

He smirks, because her voice only comes in bursts. “Damn, you really let yourself go, didn’t you?” His eyes rove her body and she’s suddenly very keenly aware of the fact that she’s not wearing any underwear beneath her sweatpants. She can feel her face blossoming.

“Whatever.” She turns away quickly and digs her phone out of her purse, cursing when she hears the Vulture following her down the aisle. She dials Jake’s number quickly, and he answers after just two rings.

“Hey, is everything oka-”

“I need you go come to the bodega by my apartment,” she whispers. She can feel her hand trembling again and she curses whatever part of her thought it would be a good idea to do this on her own.

“Wait, what? Why are you -”

“I thought I could walk over here and get what I needed without you, but -” she winces at the sound of the Vulture’s laugh, loud and obnoxious behind her. “But I ran into someone and I need you to come save me.”

“Santiago, look - they do make extra-small condoms! Should I put a whole box in for you and Peralta or is that too many?”

She hears a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line. “Is that the Vulture?” He asks quietly.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes. Do not faint.”

“I’m doing my best, but please hurry.”

Amy starts pacing up and down the aisles, doing her best to block the Vulture out. He trails along behind her, alternating between making lewd sexual innuendos about random items on the shelves they pass (“Everything’s a sex toy if you try hard enough,” while pointing out a plastic broom) and insulting her general appearance (“Y’know, you were much sexier before Peralta dragged you down to his level of ugliness. Just make sure your ass doesn’t get as fat as his”). It’s around the time they make it back to the medicine aisle that he turns to making fun of Jake himself.

“I still can’t believe you’re with that loser,” he laughs as Amy finally swipes a bottle of Nyquil off a lower shelf. She stands up slowly, gripping the shelves above her firmly, as a wave of vertigo hits her once again. “You’re hot as shit usually - not right now, obviously - I bet you could sleep with any guy you want.”

She clenches her jaw and tries to calculate how long it’s been since she hung up with Jake.

“I bet the sex is really boring, too,” the Vulture continues. “I bet it’s all missionary and full of, like, eye-contact and shit. I bet he tells you he loves you because you don’t make fun of his tiny weiner.”

“Okay, y’know what?” She snaps, and suddenly her voice is half back. “First of all, there’s nothing wrong with missionary if you do it right. Secondly, you’re full of crap if you really think eye-contact is boring. Third, you’re right, he does tell me he loves me, because he actually loves me, you sexist pig. And fourth, he’s not tiny.”

“Whatever. He’s a joke, just like you, and I bet the sex sucks and you’re both so bad at it that you can’t even tell that it sucks.”

She knows people are staring, but her brain just isn’t functioning right. She yanks her phone out of her purse and quickly scrolls over to her list. “Jake’s the best sex I’ve ever had, okay? In fact, he’s so good that I made a list!” She shoves her phone in his face and scrolls quickly, grinning in manic triumph at the dumbfounded look on his face. “I made a list of all the things I want to do with him because he’s so unbelievably good. You wish you were as good as him.”

He is, for once, speechless. Amy locks her phone and steps back, smug grin on her face. The Vulture’s eyes flicker to something over her shoulder and she sees the spark of recognition in his face; when she turns, she feels her stomach drop down to her toes.

Jake’s standing at the end of the aisle, looking just as dumbstruck as the Vulture. She gasps, and the sound comes out like a ragged squeak. His mouth is hanging open but his brows draw together at the sound.

“Ja- Jake,” she says hoarsely.

This seems to snap him out of his stupor. His mouth snaps closed and he immediately begins striding down the aisle toward her and there’s something new in his eyes - smug and barely-contained glee, maybe - when he throws his arm around her shoulders. “Hi, honey,” he says, laying a kiss against her temple and pulling the bottle of Nyquil from her grasp. “Let’s get you back in bed.”

“Yeah, well, you’re both a couple of losers!” The Vulture shouts after them. Jake twists around and flashes his middle finger at him and grins into Amy’s hair at the sound of his splutters. “I’m buying thirty-five boxes of condoms!”

“You’re amazing.” Jake murmurs once they’re outside of the store. “But next time, just call me instead of trying to go get stuff on your own. I really don’t mind doing it for you. That’s what boyfriends are for.”

She sinks into the passenger’s seat of his car and sighs in relief; her body is already aching from the exertion of just a lap around the bodega. She feels Jake slide in on the driver’s side, feels the engine roar to life beneath her and the air conditioner tickle across her face. The car lurches a little when he puts it in drive and then his free hand finds hers and interlaces their fingers.

“I’m sorry about…that.” She whispers once he’s pulled away from the curb.

“It’s fine, but I really mean it about calling me next time, okay? ‘Specially since you almost fainted this morning and everything, like, what would’ve happened if you’d fallen and hit your head and they took you to the hospital? They would’ve called Manny and it would’ve taken him three hours to get here and -”

“Wait, no, they’d call you,” she interrupts. “Manny’s not my emergency contact anymore. You are.”

He turns his head toward her and stares.

“I changed it two years ago, Peralta. Way before we started dating. I just figured, y’know, since you’re my partner and everything, you’d be able to get there the fastest. And, besides, that’s not even what I was talking about. I meant…the stuff I said to the Vulture. The list.”

“Oh,” he shrugs. “I don’t really care. The guy’s an ass. I could hear him yelling all the way from the front doors. Besides, you weren’t lying.”

He squeezes her hand a few times in quick succession and she snorts. “So you’re…not mad? About any of it?”

“I’m more curious than anything else. Do I get to look at the list, too? Or is that just between you and the Vulture?”

“I can’t stand you.”

She does let him see it once they’re back to her place. He reads each item carefully three times over without ever saying a word, and then stands and grabs his laptop and a notepad off of her dining room table. When she asks what he’s doing, he responds with a muttered “research” and then promptly tells her to finish her soup.

The night passes in a haze that has nothing to do with the cold or the soup or the medicine, and the next morning she wakes to the sounds of Jake’s congested voice explaining through chest-rumbling coughs that neither he nor Amy would be making it into work that day.

#em answers #brooklyn nine nine #amy santiago #jake peralta #jake x amy #my b99 fics #god i've been writing for b99 for a Really Long Time #sos #Anonymous

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slvertongues · 3 years

Text

i forgot who tagged me but i got tagged a while ago so thank you friends <3

this works as a quick about questionnaire i might just add it as mobile nav lmao

1. Why did you choose your url?

wanted an url that would include both louis and mark, neo worked bc nct mbrs are called neos so yeah

2. Any side blogs?

a bunch yeah, neolouis was actually my first one actually and the one i'm most active on beside my main. i have one dedicated for the colour purple and another aes one but it’s mostly gold jewelry and pretty people lmaoo

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

about 6 years now

4. Do you have a queue tag?

yeah, it’s à la queue leu leu

5. Why did you start your blog?

it was supposed to be my rant/personal blog but i got into louis around nov 2019, so i just turned into a louie thing bc i didnt want to clog my main

6. Why did you choose your pfp?

made it bc the HQ pic was released and it caught my eye right away, my best icon ever actually, and purple and orange my brand

7. Why did you choose your header?

my favorite interview + my favorite color + reference to fearless and otb yeah she's perfect *gives myself a pat on the head for making it*

8. What’s your post with the most notes?

too lazy to look for the link rn but it’s my og purple and yellow gifset of the gq undercover interview, my favorite child

9. How many mutuals do you have?

~60?

10. How many followers do you have?

feels like just me and the friends kmjlhkgv but on this one more than i should have lmao

11. How many people do you follow?

110

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

who hasn’t?

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

no comment

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

does indirecting someone for supporting reposters count ???? if not, yeah no, i avoid confrontation

15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? scroll

16. Do you like tag games?

yeah but i never know who to tag djjddj

17. Do you like ask games?

yeeah, i actually prefer these to tag games

18. Which of your mutuals do you think are Tumblr famous?

autumn definitely jzjdjdjdufu, and others to some degree for Opinions lmao

tagging @louislesbian <3

#tag games #lee's bs #*mnav

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briteboy · 7 years

Photo

(circumstantial name by @earnoodle)

IT’S FINALLY TIME FOR THE POST YOU’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR (or maybe just that one anon)

there’s a LOT in here, newer questions are generally first so if you asked something a while ago and you’re only interested in that, scroll towards the bottom. also doing wcifs separately (errr i’m gonna try my hardest to ok don’t crucify me)

this mass anons post includes topics ranging from Very Sweet Things Said To Me That I Don’t Deserve, nitpicking stranger things, crying over ramona, lou theories, Cillian Is A Fucking Creep theories (true), and completely unhelpful reshade advice

let’s f0cking do this

You're right, apart from carrying his stupid brain, Santi's head didn't do anything to any of us. I apologize for anon.

I'm pretty sure I said that already but I love Rooney and Santi's relationship so much I literally have no words for it

ME TOO LIKE IT’S JUST SO PURE TWO NOT-KIDS SCARED OF THE ADULT WORLD TRYING TO FIGURE THINGS OUT WITH THEIR WEIRD BRAINS TOGETHER ;__; i love them

YO i didnt know u were a demigirl!! im a demiboy nb Buddies

hell fuckin yeah dude!! we are starting a demi club

Ok but like I really want werewolves. Like I know it sounds stupid but we have vampire and while yes I love my bat babes, I want a giant pupper friend. I have story written out and plans for a cabin to build. Now I’m waiting for EA to give me my big hairy babes.

DUDE i want more supernatural stuff too, mostly witches like I NEED MY WITCHES AGAIN!!! ts3 witches were so good. i didn’t like ts3 werewolves much but i feel like they’d be super cool in ts4, knowing how the vampires came out. i NEED it

hihi! i've been very quietly (??) following your blog for some time now and i just fawn over your characters way too much ?? anywho, i've been wanting to start my own little simblr story but ,, i'm not entirely sure where to even start? i have so many stories that i'd love to get out there, and i have the means.. butt, how did you go about starting out?? so sorry this is so long but i look up to you a whole ton!!! ty ily! :-)

i’m the (??) lmao that’s me always but ahdhghdfkshg thank you so much!!!!! i’m so glad you love them, it means the world to me ;-; and listen, that was me, i had no idea how i was going to do it because i’d only seen ts3 stories up to that point and i thought there was like a set Way to tell stories but i had no idea what i was doing so i was like y’know what...i’m just gonna do it how i feel comfortable doing it and i’m gonna figure it out as i go along. so honestly try to roughly plan out what your stor(ies) will entail and if you get stuck on planning and can’t figure it out, just jump right into it, try to make a few scenes or get the ball rolling somehow, even if it’s just random posts (i mean that’s all my blog was until i decided to commit to santi’s story.) it’s always gonna feel weird and awkward at first, but you’ll get comfortable the more you do it and it’ll figure itself out, trust me!

I read through most of your story posts the other day and now I’m rereading it again just to torture myself some more (and maybe catch up on some posts I may have missed). I honestly don’t think I’ve come across a sims story that’s so beautifully written & includes such evocative pictures as yours. I’m really at a loss for words, it’s all so stunning. & after a nearly two-month long creative block, it’s planted the smallest seed of inspiration in the back of my mind, so thank you for your art.

AHHHH AHSDHKGKDSJG WHAT!!!!! it’s always crazy hearing that 1) people actually care about my stuff, and 2) that it inspires them. like i really cannot believe that, stilL!! thank you so so much, i’m so happy you enjoyed it (as torturous as it was, lmao) it seriously warms my heart that you’re getting your groove back in the creative world, that means more to me than ANYTHING!! good luck with your art or whatever you decide to do with that inspiration!

can i pls have your editing skill please and thank you

i owe most my editing at this point to reshade so honestly get reshade and u will probably become better than me

o added u on animal crossing and when you added me back i was so happy,, your little person is sooo adorable ((:

OMG!! thank you!! everyone’s person on there is adorable i cry i love them all so much i’m so mad tho it won’t let me add any more friends!!! it probably cuts off at like 100 friends or something STUPID

First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love your photos so much. I'm legit about to just ditch sims 3 for 4 now because of your amazing posts. 😖

LMFAO no but really THANK YOU I LOVE YOU!!! if you can manage playing both i admire u, i’ve invested too much time and effort into ts4 to ever fully go back to any other sims games tbh

The new patch made my game unplayable! I'm crying, I miss my doggos...

NOOOOO!!! hopefully by now you’ve found a fix, i’m prayin for u

long time listener, first time caller yoooo. i like everyone love your stories and your sim aesthetic so so so much and just tbh i was offended on your behalf about that ask from that person wanting to novelize your stories. like you were way too nice. this is your intellectual property and it's fucked up that someone would think it'd be okay to duplicate it as long as they used a different medium. this is prob a bad one to repost just wanted to you to know you're an awesome, singular voice

omfg lmao this is a radio show now *z100 voice* tellem why ya mad euhhh first of all i can’t believe someone even ASKED that, i’m in shock because like what this is so foreign to me. people want to write about MY characters WHAT! like that alone...takes a long time to process. and like i know i should say no but then i feel mean but they’re also my creations so like idk. it warms my heart that you feel so strongly and would stand up for me like that i’m cryin thank u for calling in i love u

I JUST FINISHED YOUR ENTIRE STORY AND I'M NOT OK WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE PUTTING ME THROUGH THAT SHIT IT'S AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER AND I FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE ABUSED MY (NON EXISTENT) INNOCENCE WOW

I’M SO SORRY U HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT ALSO I APOLOGIZE FOR STEALING YOUR INNOCENCE I NEVER MEANT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN OSDAFKJDSK BUT THANK YOU FOR READING I’M GLAD YOU ENJOYED IT EVEN IF IT HURT YOU!!!

I've been up all night and it's now 11am. I'm completely binging on your stories bc I am in LOVE and need a Molly in my game asap. Do you think you'll ever upload her?

omG my freaking story inciting insomnia i’m so sorry for ur sleep schedule first of all, but at least that makes you identify with santi even more omg tho ;___; (how many times will i say ‘omg’ i wonder) i don’t think so because she is so dear to me and makes my heart ache, she is just so special, i dunno if i could ever release her into the wild like that lmao. i haven’t even shared her with my friends (not that i really ever had a reason to) but like yeah. maybe in the future that’ll change but right now, no, i’m sorry <3

To change the topic: Idk if you watch stranger things but I only managed to get to episode 3 of season 2 before I stopped watching lmao it was so bad and Billy (a certified Cunt) ruined the whole show for me

YEAH I DID! omg. i have a LOT of issues with this season (mostly in how badly they tried to retcon nancy and everyone else not caring about barb’s death, how bad the writing was in the realm of nancy and steve breaking up and then her and jonathan getting together...holy fuck it was so uncomfortable with that 40 yr old conspiracy theorist guy i couldn’t even enjoy my ship getting together lmao) also ur right, max and billy honestly did not offer anything to the story...like i loved max too but what was the point...billy acted like their presence and the reason they had to move was so dramatic when it was really nothing...unless they’re saving that for season 3 but like. the whole situation with billy was so anticlimactic. he was like a walmart version of henry from IT. like boohoo ur dad’s an asshole and then he beat up steve. good character arc. i liked max standing up for herself but really...that whole thing was so lackluster, i didn’t care about it at all. ALSO I HATED THAT THEY DIDN’T LET MAX AND ELEVEN BE FRIENDS!! i’m sure it’ll happen in season 3 but like c’mon...that would’ve made the max character feel a little more important to the story. anyway yeah fuck billy and i don’t get why everyone is lusting after him or his actor they’re both ugly! thanks for listening

I just got the sims 4 + city living and I’m so excited! I was really inspired by your stories and style in general... I was wondering what packs do you have and also what are your favourite sims 4 hairs? I’m having trouble finding ones and I love your style!

YAY I’M EXCITED FOR YOU!!! omg aww it warms my heart so much when people say i inspire them because i never anticipated that kind of response, thank you so much <3 hmmm i think i have all of them except glamour stuff and fitness stuff. and pretty much all the hairs i download are here or here. (or the subsequent ‘tf’, ‘cf’, ‘tm’ and ‘cm’ tags as well, according to age)

UHM a 19 year old and a 13 year old? Poor baby Lou... Also youre a brilliant writer i cant

😬😬😬 stay tuned ajasdhjhjsahd thank you so much!!!

My stan levels for you have increased so much? like thanks for being a good ally, clAps for femmesim!

lmao thank you, i don’t really deserve praise tho i’m just passing on the knowledge of those patient enough to teach me. just trying to do what i can with my privilege u know. ily

How do you have teeth showing in so many of your pictures of Lou and Molly, do you PS them in?

i’ve gotten this question before and it’s usually just the poses used! i do have some lipsticks that have teeth on them but i mostly use them for just rooney.

Honestly, a fight between Santi and that new guy (srry, forgot his name while typing this) would be so hot. Like, I hope Santi would win but like just watching Santi fight him for Lou would make me happy!! Also, I live for your stories💞

omG i’m about to call up vince mcmahon they both need to fight on smackdown it’s gonna happen. they’ll both be shirtless too ok and THANK YOU ILY

boi poc can be PREJUDICED against white people but there is no such thing as reverse racIIIIIIiiiiIIIIIiiiIIIIsm

Lemme just say that you must be feeling so stressed rn. I love you and your simblr!!! Your posts light up my day!! <3333

OMg kind of. this week has taken A Lot out of me and i really just want to chill at home and play my freaking GAME but obligations. u know. here’s hoping i get a day off this week. i’m mad i’m probably gonna miss gianni’s birthday too (it’s on tuesday) and i wanted to do something for it!! i’ll probably do it late like i did last year too lmao i’m so sorry baby g ANYWAY u didn’t ask to hear about any of this...thank you for this sweet message i love you <3

why,,,, are people... coming to your blog to discuss race you are a fucking simblr WHAT

the real question is why do people go to you like its your job to educate them lmao like theres so many resources out there

SHAWDY u aint wrong reverse racism is literally a joke i am so sorry you have to go through all of this keep stepping on white feelings we deserve it

I was wondering would u consider Asians to be POC?

yes

I just finished Strange the Dreamer and it was fucking amazing. I cried so much and I laughed and I sat in absolute amazement at the world Laini Taylor has created. 100/10 would recommend

ahhhh i really need to read it apparently!! i’m like 10% away from being done with a dance with dragons (and then i have to wait for the next book like a peasant HURRY UP KING GEORGE) anyway this one is definitely on my list!

omgomg!! I just met this girl in my class who has eyes just like ramona's!!! But like instead of being brown w/ a little bit of blue, they were blue w/ a little bit of brown!!! Dude I was so shook I rlly didn't think ppl had eyes like that!

OMG!!!! that’s amazing! and yes heterochromia is a real thing haha. i’ve only met one person with it and he had the same color combo as ramona too, only his was full heterochromia, not sectoral.

*me in the background screaming* nO yOU LEAVE HER ALoNE baD-DAD-MaN!

ME TF TOO

every time i read some of your stories i get an ache in my heart that doesn't go away until i either cry or sleep so interpret that as you like

OMG ;_____; ok me too tho my heart literally hurts thinking about my characters sometimes...mostly santi...i hate him (no i don’t :{ )

hey uhh idk if you've answered something like this before but do you have a spotify or something bc your music taste is GOLD

THANK YOU!! you were the first person to ask about this haha and hopefully you saw my answer to the other question about it! i just made one and it’s here!

hi hi ! i’m seeing all the drama on da blog and i really want to read the whole story but i can’t get to it on mobile so i was wondering if you could link the beginning and tell me what the best order to read it in is ( i’m so confused because i’ve seen sm people y’all about a parallel story so idk if i’m being dumb !! ) i hope this isn’t any inconvenience also your sims are so beautiful sjajsjajs

hey on mobile the link is just: http://femmesim.tumblr.com/tagged/story/chrono i would honestly just recommend that order haha, it makes things simpler and it encompasses ALL story posts, or posts that give context. there are parallels in my story, lou’s is kind of a parallel of santi’s, only different...well...you’ll see. but yeah sorry this is so late! and thank you!!!

TU HISTORIA ES TAAAAAN BUENA POR DIOOOOS (YOURE STORY IS SOOOOO GOOD OMG) <3 <3 *OO* *cries in spanish*

MUCHAS GRACIAS ENCANTADORA PERSONAAAA <333

lou is wendy right? i mean, a wendy complex is someone who is overly mothering to partners, and lou is already a mother and ik that doesn't really count as foreshadowing but it seems like it could be a link to me. it'd make sense too, considering guys that go after younger girls (ew) are usually immature ie peter pan complex. it'd make the most sense that those two go together then.

heheheheh that is a VERY good observation...that’s all i’m gonna say!!

This has nothing to do with what's happening in the story rn, but whatever. I was wondering if you were going to mention lou's struggles with being a single mom and the stigma surrounding single motherhood? As a single mother myself I'd really enjoy seeing you take on the issue. Personally, my biggest problem was overcoming the generalizations people put on you when you're a single mom. People always assumed that I that I was stupid and uneducated because I had my son when I was 17.

yes! that will definitely come up. i will focus a lot on her struggles as a single mom. so far i’ve mostly just peppered in some stuff about money troubles, and that will come up again, and the issues you mention will be pretty central to her character as well. i’m sorry you have to endure that, it’s not fair. people don’t even realize how strong and dedicated single mothers are.

when you say Peter Pan, do you mean the Disney stuff or the og creepy stuff?

i mean the general themes of the story and how that translates into a peter pan complex: boy who never grows up, feels like he fits in more with younger people (haha...yikes), read the message above because that anon described the other half of the equation better than i could

Wait, hold up. That dude is cute but I feel like he’s coming onto Lou way too strong. I have a bad feeling.. Lou is like 13 there and he is 19 I mean I’ve seen bigger gaps between people, but she is not legal yet.. Where are you going with this? 🤨😅

yyyyyyep that feeling is warranted! i am going a way i don’t think you guys expect me to go...i think you’ll be very confused at the end of this part lmao. that being said, i’m not putting any of this in for shock value or to romanticize inappropriate relationships like this. (i’m probably going to be repeating that a LOT for this story but please just keep that in mind)

Hey mom wanna hear a fun as hell story? I just got back from the ER bc I fell on my razor after showering, and practically cut my nipple in half. (I am in so much pain hELP)

OMFG NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR POOR NIPPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M SO SORRY I HOPE IT FEELS BETTER PLEASE UPDATE ME ON THE NIPPLE STATUS

U gotta watch sense8!!! Apart from the v awkward sex scenes it's v good, has a lot of representation and shit Just watch that shit show, u won't regret it (And if you do I cut your throat oops)

i’ve heard it’s good! i remember when it first came out and everyone was like Wow The Representation so honestly anything with diversity has already got me hooked pls don’t murder me.

I'm calling it now. He's Fi's dad. and he's a FUCKING CREEP!! Bitch you are 19!! LOU IS 13!! BACK THE FUCK OFF YOU PERV!!

no spoilers or anything but honestly i’m with you @ cillian die

Are they gonna fucc, o no

right now? no. that would be Very Bad

bABY ITS COLD OUTSIDE

oh same

Hi ! Your lastest edit (graveyard girl) is truly amazing, how did you make that bokeh behind her ? 😱😍

thank you so much!!! it’s reshade (with matso DOF)!

You've probably got this question a lot of times but i can't find the answer for it. What reshade do you use?

i gotta add this to my faq, it’s one i created myself but i started out with this one (it totally doesn’t resemble that one anymore but i think it’s a good starting point)

how do you make good looking male sims? mine always look the same and kinda girly..

hmmm longer faces, prominent chins and jaws, smaller eyes, bigger noses...generally yeah

What do you mean 9 + alt?

you gotta turn bb.moveobjects on and then press alt + 9 when an object is selected to move it upward. so what i did with those poses i made was, i selected a teleporter and pressed alt + 9 until it was at a spot i liked on the roof. that’s why releasing those poses would be tricky, ‘cause every build is different so there’s no set way to place them, you just kinda have to play around with them

You mentioned GoT so naturally, I have to chime in and express my love for Jon. Honestly, he won me over ever since the first season? I'm at season 5 now and people have already warned me so now i'm silently weeping, waiting for something to happen to my precious bby help

JONNY BOY!!!!!!!!!!! i loved his emo ass since the beginning but his arc with qorin halfhand (was he in the show??) was probably the best arc in book 2 and then his book 3 arc was just...SO GOOD, SO MUCH happens to him and i just felt like i was watching my son go through it all...i love that boy so much ;-; i’m almost at the end of the last book and i’m scared for him because of the one spoiler i know lmao and you’re at that point too so GET READY we’ll go through it together ok

So there's this game I'm playing where someone talking about another character says 'maybe you can break him from his ouroboros of self-fladulation' (I know I probably butchered those spellings but I'm not a bright egg and autocorrect isn't helping rip) and tbh it made me think of Santi. (Also I'mma scream of you get this reference jsyk)

OMG THE FACT THAT YOU THOUGHT OF HIM ;-; and it’s okay u are the brightest egg in the bunch to me. I’M SORRY I DON’T GET THIS REFERENCE BECAUSE I’M NOT A VIDEO GAME PERSON BUT I’LL PRETEND I DO KNOW WHAT UR TALKING ABOUT anyway yes santi is currently in the process of breaking his self-flagellation and embracing the oneness of the ouroboros (as opposed to letting the cycle repeat itself until he’s worn down to nothing)

do you have any favorite pose creators?

answered

do you have any tips for taking good screenshots in game? like how to get the good angles and good quality? i play on ultra but i think when i zoom in and then use the arrows on my keyboard to move around, the pictures gets less clear and looks kinda blurry. how should i do this?

well if you’re already using ultra, there’s not much you can do lmao. sims 4 is just bad with textures in general. it also depends on the objects as well, some are better quality than others. if i zoom in far on a sim’s face, i generally know there will be some pixelation and i can clean that up in photoshop with topaz clean and the smudge tool. i am very reliant on photoshop sometimes lmao. it sounds like you already have the basics of taking good screenshots, it’s just sometimes you have to fight and work with sims 4′s less-than-hd quality.

burn it down by daughter reminds me of santi & i'm in pain

ouroboros!!! death! birth! death again! birth again rinse repeat! also santi breaking the cycle because third time's the charm

The tattoo is an Ouroboros. It originated in Egyptian iconography, and it symbolizes recreation. My boy's recreating himself, I'm so proud.

ouroboros, the dragon eating its own tail. it's a sign of eternal renewal

i saw the post of child molly and just started BAWLING i miss her what the fuck she's my fave character i'M CRYING

ME TOO BICH!! ME FUCKIN TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just read all of A Serious Case Of The Novembers so far and theres still tears on my face. some of the best stuff ive read in a while, great job on everything

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! ALSO I’M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU CRY

every time you write about molly and her in heaven it makes my heart swell, like the characters were answering asks and someone asked her what heaven was like and even though it was so small short lil answer it still pulls at the heart strings, basically what im trying to say is that your writing is so good! <3

omg ;_______; me too, i feel like she has such a simple way with words and although her descriptions of heaven are brief, they are also complex and beautiful, and even just writing it chokes me up ;-; thank you so much tho i’m so glad you like it!!

Molly: out Molly tatto: also out

why did this remind me of this post:

How did you edit in the fire in the last post? Looks cool

i searched things like “bonfire” and pasted parts of it that i wanted on the pic to make it look more realistic, then put a layer mask on the pasted pic and erased the edges and stuff to make it blend in better. the sparks and stuff i added by pasting it onto a new layer and changing the blending mode to screen!

idk if you have every watched grey anatomy but Lou's backstory is starting to remind me of Jo (Jo is a character from the show) like Jo was in a abusive relationship and she is married to the guy but she cant get divorced or he will come and find her. So like if Lou didn't tell Fiona's dad he was a dad and Lou was married to him and cant escape the marriage (cause abuse), plus it would explain Lou's kink with being choked ;) full circle *god-like heaven music with tiniest violin is playing now*

ooh no i don’t but that’s interesting and i’m excited you even made a connection like that! i will say that it’s not lou who likes to be choked (the very opposite actually lmao) but otherwise the situation does kinda fit. i’m the violin

I have a freakin bio pre ap test tomorrow on photosynthesis and i have no idea what it is im going to fail save me

I’M ANSWERING THIS VERY LATE BUT I HOPE YOUR TEST WENT WELL!!!!!! *spongebob voice* photosynthesis

last time I installed reshade I couldn't get it to open the controls or shaders or anything in game :///// any tips?? I love they way reshade looks too!!

hmmmmm well i know the control panel opens when you press shift + f2, and then you check the boxes of the effects you want on them. i haven’t heard of this problem so i dunno what other advice to give i’m sorry :{ if it’s your first time installing it, you might have to wait a little to get it to load up.

Da puppy is so cute!!!

That dog and Romona are so adorable, I might cry

Ramona's cheeks are so big im in love

NAJKSDJGKJSD THANK YOU i love her and her chubby cheeks ;-;

OMG TOTORO IS SO BEAUTIFUL I LOVE GHIBLI UGH FKSJFJANFB

SAME!!!!!!! if i could only watch ghibli movies for the rest of my life i’d be totally fine with that

THE DOGGIE HAS EYES JUST LIKE RAMONAS IM GONNA FUCKIGN CRY

ME FUCKGN TOO!!!!!!!!!! it was fate (aka me creating the wolf pup to look just like her shh i am fate)

Hope I'm not bothering you but i wondered if you knew how to make Tamo sims eyebags work on a toddler? Do I just click in s4s to work for toddler on the "age and gender flags" when looking in My CC or do I have to do something a little more than that please? Thank you.

for any skin detail or makeup, you have to go into s4s and open the package up, go to one of the tabs (honestly i don’t remember which one because i don’t have it open rn lmao) and you’ll see the different age groups and you check the box for toddler. and then save it of course. (there’s probably a better guide on how to do this somewhere lmao)

Hey :) Sorry to take up your time, I was wondering if you use win7, win8 or win10? I'm trying to decide on one and people seem to have very strong feelings about it. Also what web browser do you use? I've used Firefox, but I had some problems on CC websites. Thanks<3

i use windows 10 because it came with my laptop lmao i honestly don’t know much about windows systems at all!! and i use google chrome because it’s never failed me (even though windows keeps pressuring me to use the new internet explorer called “edge”)

i just finished all of novembers in a sitting and 1. i'm Sobbing, 2. your music taste is bomb

THANK YOU!!! my music taste is like one part indie shit, one part rap and hip-hop, twelve parts emo middle school bands

what is the size of the original unedited screenshot?

1920x1080

For reshade when your first install and select the reshade you want to use do you have to edit the settings? Cause last time I tried to (I didn’t know what most of the things meant lmao) but it kept saying error or something so I couldn’t play the game so I ended up taking out reshade

do you mean the preset you want to use? i mean no you can just play with that preset, you don’t have to change anything about it. i’m not sure what you mean but i followed this guide for setting it up

Will you ever share your preset?? Or maybe a preset made be you??

i’ve answered this before but the answer is Maybe

Hi!!!! How do you make the rays of light you have in your photos?? THANK U BBY <3333

that’s actually in my editing tutorial but here you go <3

is reshade only available on windows + do we need to pay for it

yes and no

Hello love! I was wondering (and maybe it's a dumb question, idk) but what life span setting do you use? I would assume you turned off aging for your story but maybe I'm wrong ;w; Thank you!!

i do actually have aging off ‘cause i’m a coward lmao even in the ts3 days when i wasn’t doing story stuff and literally just playing i had it off for the most part and just aged sims up when i wanted because i like to be in control of Everything (aries)

I really just wanted to say that I’m new I your tumblr but your stories are amazing and I love them so much!!! Keep doing what you’re doing💞👏🏼

hey thank you!!! you are so kind and i’m glad you’re enjoying everything!!

In your reshade settings where have you set it to save your SS's to and which key please? I can't find mine after setting it to desktop/screenshots :(

i just set mine to ts4′s screenshots folder because it’s what i was used to and it works for me haha. hmmmmmm did you copy the exact address or whatever it’s called of your folder’s location and then paste it into the reshade box? try doing that with another location and see if it works. if anything you can do what i did ‘cause it worked for me

ok SO i came across this music video for this like spanish/english speaking indie band called The Marías and the song was déjate llevar and literally everything about the music video reminded me of rooney and gianni

OMMMGGG i love this so much, i cry @ music suggestions and this is so them ;-; i think i’ve heard of this band before actually!!

a little life is going to fucking ruin you,,, just a warning

great! i look forward to it

can a steal ur talent

have it i don’t need it

What app are you using to make them cool edit things??

i tagged it but it was doodle face

omg Strange the Dreamer is so freaking amazing! It’s literally one of my favorite books of all time; You’ll love it. The writing is absolutely delightful

you guys are really singin the praises for this book!! i have so many dang books to read i swear

#nonsims #saviorhide #anonymous #sunny answers #it is done and i never want to see another anon message again #i retire

46 notes · View notes

nobravery · 7 years

Text

Not Meant To Be

a Shawn Mendes Imagine.

Requested: No.

Author's Note: Okay lmao this is actually a repost bc I'd deleted this because it sucks and I edited it a bit given that Shawn had moved to his condo etc, and mostly because some things didn't make sense lol. So here's the very first imagine I'd written about this guy we call Shawn Mendes. One more time you'll note that some terms in italics aren't translated, some were intentional (at the beginning the y/n was meant to come from the UK, but I had to change because of the French I couldn't translate rip), others not because there are precisely some expressions I couldn't translate in English (I don't know the equivalents in English). In conclusion, I know that I've probably misconjugated a lot but I don't care I've never really understood how to use the tenses in English lol.

WordCount: 2,551

Tuesday, August 15th. Half past eleven.

Actually, for these two last days, they had been staying at the Mendes’ household, because Shawn wanted to spend some time with his family. What could be more natural? At this precise moment, both of them were standing in the room, alone. They just ended what they were doing. Shawn had written some lyrics and had sung a bit, as regards y/n, she’d been working, preparing herself for her next year at University.

Without knowing why, she was staring around her now. First of all, the sofa where she sat so many times. Even without being sat on it she could smell the scent of the leather. It was a smell she never forgot. Then her look drifted towards the dining-room. It was made with wood. A good quality wood. The well-put chairs were too.

She truly loved this house. It was like hers.

However, suddenly, his voice obligated her not to be in trance anymore.

« Listen, y/n, I don’t mean to seem brusque, but we need to talk. About something serious. »

The young girl started instantly.

« Okay, I’m listening to you, she mumbled, taking her handouts. »

She was just thinking about his voice she just heard. Her favorite melody. It was as pleasant as the sound of the waves while you’re on the beach or even the sound of the raindrops crashing on the windows while raining. His voice always appeased her.

Shawn took a deep breathe before trying to make a proper speech.

« I don’t know where and how I should start. Look, I really love you, I–

– I love you too, Shawn, what’s the p–

– No please, let me talk first, listen to me carefully until the end. You’ll talk after me. »

y/n answered with a nod. She continued to stare at his pretty hazel eyes which were beautifully shining.

« I love you. I’m a hundred percent sure. I know what I feel for you. You’re very special, you’re full of qualities, you mean a lot to me. Really, you’re really perfect to me. I… I… Look, right now I feel as if I made you waste your time, I feel as if I was a very bad boyfriend because I’m never here for you while you need strong and solid support for you new year at Uni. Both you and I are leaving tomorrow and won’t see each other for awhile, I won’t be able to fly to France for a moment. I already miss you even though you’re still there with me, in my own house, and I don’t want you to suffer from my perpetual absence. So, all of this things hurt me. y/n, you need someone who’s always alongside you, someone who could give you more than I would be able to, you know? You deserve happiness and not suffering because of me, because you’re always waiting for me and because I’m never beside you. You deserve to be with someone who’s always there for you and not a poor guy who’s even not in the same timezone as yours. You follow? I… I feel as if I wasn’t the one that you need, y/n. My life is insane, we are worlds apart. I’m not meant to be with someone right now. I’m not the one who can love you in the way you deserve. »

He interrupted himself.

« I don’t deserve you. You deserve better than me. You deserve the best. »

y/n said nothing. She hadn’t moved an inch. Her eyes were examining the floor.

« You… you wanna break up? she said calmly.

– That's… that’s I was trying to say, yes. »

She swallowed, without talking more. She simply put her numerous handouts onto the table again.

« Please, y/n, say something, Shawn beseeched her, only noting the oppressive silence. »

She licked her bottom lip, trying to find something coherent to say.

« Come on, we need to talk together about this. »

She just sighed.

« So… it was bound to happen, right? You know Shawn, you won’t believe me but yes, you are the only one for me, the only one I want. This might be crazy uh… I don’t want nobody but you… You’re the only reason why I wake up each morning while my studies are literally killing me, the reason why I continue to revise properly for the sake of having a nice job later. I just need you, and no matter if you’re always on tour, I have a life too, I have my classes, my revisions, etc–

– Maybe it’s okay for you. It’s what you say. But I’m not. I’m not okay with the fact that you are so far from me. That I always must leave. That I can’t see with my own eyes how you are daily. That you’re living your life thousands of kilometers away from me, leaving you alone. I’m sorry, but I’m not a proper boyfriend. I can’t. I can’t stand that. And I know you enough to tell you that you deserve better than a ghost boyfriend.

– It doesn’t matter to me. I love you. I was told that quelqu'un qui sait attendre en vaut la peine, someone who can wait is someone who’s worth it.

– But I can’t wait. I can never actually. QED. »

Each of them were going round in circles. Him running his fingers through his rumpled hair in frustration, she looking up at him, finally drowning her look into his.

« Je… I’ve no more arguments, uttered y/n. If you think that it’s the best for us… It depends on you actually, so…

– I’m not saying that we can’t be friends though–

– I don’t know. Actually it’s more complicated that I had beforehand planned.

– What do you mean?

– Nothing. Let it down. »

She wasn’t looking at him anymore, but the floor, her hands in the pockets.

« As I’m gonna leave tomorrow, I assume that I have to start packing.

– Okay, retorted the Canadian sadly. »

y/n picked up all of her handouts again, then hastened to leave the room, ran up the stairs to get back to Shawn’s room where her suitcase had been put, with some stuffs she had unpacked. So she started putting her things away, as carefully as hastily. She tried to look impartial.

A few minutes later, she could hear the young boy climbing the stairs as well, and standing on the doorstep.

« Are you mad at me? he finally asked.

– I don’t know, honestly. There’s nothing else to add. It’s over.

– Hum, hum.

– We’re just not meant to be. That’s a fact. That’s life. We all do mistakes.

– Wait, are you saying that you and I, it was a mistake? Am I a mistake for you? »

The young girl sighed loudly, looking for something pertinent to answer.

« That’s not what I meant. Don’t be a fool please Shawn. Just… I hope for you that you’ll find someone who will be able to travel the world with you. Or another popstar I guess, I don’t know. As long as she’s a fully English-speaker, Anglophone… you know; car moi tu vois ça me saoûle tout ça, je– well I’m tired, I can’t take anymore, she corrected rapidly in English, with a clipped voice.

– I’m sorry, but really, you know that I– we made this decision for our own good. And we needed to talk to you about this.

– Fine. And we ended up by taking the decision together eventually.

– Hum hum…

– I understand you know, Shawn. You’re right. We’re not meant to be, as I said previously. We don’t live in the same world. »

While she was squatting down, y/n got up again to face Shawn who had got closer.

« Is your suitcase finally finished? he questioned.

– Almost finished. I just let some stuffs until tomorrow.

– Okay, so much the better. »

She sighed one more time.

« You know? After all we’ve done together during a short time, I’ve flown there for the second time especially for you, I came to your shows in Toronto and Montreal these days, the money I’ve spent to see you… And now we’re just saying that « it’s over ». I’ll need some time.

– I know, likewise. Look, I’m sorry again, I–

– No, stop talking, say nothing. It hurts us enough. Please. I just don’t realize for the moment. Just… I must admit that I’m glad you chose your career and not me. As I had told you when we started dating, your career is literally your life, and I don’t want you to ruin it now because of me. Just like me, you’re about to be nineteen, you’re young and you have a plenty of things to discover in your field yet. »

Shawn nodded in a sad way. Then he looked at his bed, next to them. The bedclothes were still rumpled. So with his eyes he analyzed the fine white sheets. He might bet that they were still impregnated with her sweet scent. Her delicious fresh lavender fragrance with a little touch of thyme. His favourite smell.

« When are you gonna leave? y/n carried on. »

The brown-hair boy didn’t answer spontaneously, thinking about all of this.

« At the same time as you.

– Okay, this is cool. »

He attempted to catch her look, but impossible. She was avoiding his.

« y/n, you’re mad.

– I’m not.

– Don’t lie to me, please even a blind would see it.

– Listen, I don’t know how I feel at the moment. It’s just difficult, I think you can understand, on est un peu dans le même bateau. Okay? she exclaimed as she was closing her backpack that she placed onto the bed, without letting up. »

But their conversation was interrupted when they heard the front door slamming downstairs. The Mendes family had just returned from shopping.

« We’re back! they could hear Shawn’s mother.

– I’m coming to help! yelled the French. »

Her gaze met Shawn’s quickly, then deserted immediately. Once downstairs, she saw Karen and Aaliyah who were putting down the groceries on the table. Manny just joined them after.

« Want me to help? y/n suggested.

– I can’t refuse, admitted Karen.

– Where’s Shawn? asked Aaliyah. I bet he’s still sleeping.

– Nope, he’s upstairs, he’s coming. »

Indeed, the latter appeared a few second not long afterwards.

« What did you do this morning? questioned the father.

– Nothing special, I’ve studied a bit, and I just packaged, y/n informed him.

– What about you, Shawn?

– I tried to write new songs. I’m getting to be inspired. »

He had a look at y/n who was staring at him… sadly?

« Well, ready for tomorrow?

– I’m kinda nervous as usual but it’s okay. »

Then Aaliyah had a glance at her brother as well as his girlfriend.

« You both guys look tired and preoccupied. Are you okay? »

The two who were concerned looked at each other, not knowing what to reply. But while they were still putting the groceries away, a ring tone rang out. Sauvés par le gong.

« Sorry, it’s mine, declared y/n, my parents are calling me. Excusez-moi. »

Wednesday, August 16th.

Pearson Airport, Toronto. Seventeen past one.

« Nothing forgotten? Karen asked the youngsters for the umpteenth time.

– Nothing, they simply answered in unison. I brought everything, added y/n. »

Shawn smiled sadly. She barely looked at him. And his parents and his sister didn’t suspect the tension there was between both the French girl and himself.

Some of Shawn’s team were there too. All of them were in the great hall and had some conversations with y/n and the young singer about the tour.

At a moment, the Frenchwoman looked at the time on her phone.

« Je dois y aller. I have to go, she simply said. »

She had a quick look at the guys then at Shawn, who was staring at his family talking with Andrew, his manager. She said goodbye to each of the boys, except Shawn who followed her joining the Mendes and Andrew, to say goodbye to them.

« Hope to see you again soon, Manny said to y/n. We can’t wait the next time.

– I hope so. I’ll come back, it’s sure.

– I’ll miss you, Aaliyah confessed. I’ll miss your French accent too I must admit.

– I’ll try to be back as soon as possible, I promise little girl. You can text me whenever you want. »

Then she said goodbye to Andrew as well as all of the crew was going to their terminal, for flight to Brooklyn.

Before y/n left on the other side, Shawn took her aside, even though the others and Andrew were beckoning him.

« Hey Shawn, both you and I have to go. »

He ignored y/n’s words, and put his hands on her cheeks. He looked at her lips, these famous lips that taste like mint. These well-shaped lips that were still his only few days ago. He wanted to kiss them, but he perfectly well knew that he couldn’t. Then he looked at her, gazing into each other’s eyes. Time seemed to stop. He had always had this impression. He just acted as if they were both alone in the middle of the airport, close to the boarding areas. He kept staring at her pupils. These beautiful ones. She still had this radiant look that made her attractive even more.

« I already miss you, you know, Shawn confided to y/n. »

She didn’t answer; she looked so neutral. So he removed his hands from her pinky cheeks, still staring at her.

« Can I hug you? he timidly asked.

– Yes, as you wish. Come there. »

He pulled her close to him, rubbing her back with his hand. She was wearing the black tshirt he bought her few weeks ago. A sign that she was still fond of him, maybe. A physical way to show it. A way not to forget him.

Then she pulled away, and kissed on his right cheek eventually.

« Give me some news when you have time, Shawn begged her.

– Okay. I’ll try… Ça ne mange pas de pain hein. Sorry but I have to go now, really. I mustn’t be late. I’m sorry. »

She was getting ready to leave when he hold her up again.

« I love you, y/n. From the bottom of my heart. »

She turned around, smiling weakly.

« Je t'aime aussi, Shawn. Adieu. »

And then, leaving Shawn behind, she was moving away more and more, walking to her terminal, ready for her boarding.

Author's Note: Sorry again if it sucks lol. Mostly with grammar and conjugation and English in general, etc. AND SORRY IF THE FORMAT LOOKS WEIRD. Thanks for reading.

#feedback is appreciated #shawn mendes #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes imagines #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes writing #mendes army

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